The real red flag is someone that needs to drink to have a good time. If they make you feel bad about not drinking run don’t walk away.
@CourtneyRyan
Жыл бұрын
Agreed!
@brianwaller7383
Жыл бұрын
Yep I can easily enjoy my time watching a game, company drinking an ice cold Pepsi instead of beer
@michaelchambers7691
Жыл бұрын
You're a man. It really sucks looking like the common stereotype of men, even those who are alcoholics who abuse their family.
@larryknicks
Жыл бұрын
I remember being on a date and when she asked if I wanted a drink. I said not right now and the vibe died instantly and she became very distant.
@boris1387
Жыл бұрын
My fiancé drinks once every couple of months, I've never touched alcohol for 30yrs and I'm nearly 50. She's cool though and I'm always the driver for us anyway lol
@Abmarp
Жыл бұрын
I tell my boyfriend that he is the definition of « If he wanted to, he could »… not because he bestows upon me lavish gifts. But because he works hard and still makes time for me. He pays attention to detail and is sensitive to my needs. I love him. I’m so thankful for him and I am blessed to have him in my life. And I make sure to let him know.
@Wolf-Man88
11 ай бұрын
Nearly every point you said was my ex. That's good to know haha.. the first point about drinking, she didn't like that I wasn't much of a drinker. I've got a very personal reason as to why I don't drink and yeah I knew that she didn't like it. As for the other points, well... At least I know what to avoid for future coz my last relationship was traumatic and I'm still getting past a few things. Thanks again for your video 🙂
@BrentJohn
Жыл бұрын
One big red flag is constantly asking for money, especially with large sums of money. It indicates financial irresponsibility and a lack of respect for you as a person. I ended up losing over $500 to one former friend I had under the promise that they'll pay me back, but kept giving me excuses why she couldn't, and didn't even make an effort to do so. I later discovered that she owed another person over $5,000. I should've filed a police report against her for obtaining property by false pretenses. Let that be a lesson to you. Never lend money to anyone who doesn't make it a priority to pay you back.
@johndingo7527
Жыл бұрын
I dont drink because I use to be an alcholic. Im proud of myself for giving up, and not ashamed to admit it. There is not one person in this world that I would drink for.
@russellborrego1689
Жыл бұрын
"now husband" congratulations!!!
@lawrence31415
Жыл бұрын
Here's the summary, fellas. Proceed with caution: 1) She has a problem with you not drinking (A good woman is not going to force you to compromise your values) 2) She says, "If you wanted to, you would..." 3) She expresses criticism more than affirmation 4) She takes more than she gives 5) She's consistently inconsistent (This is a sign that she's not being serious about you) Here's one to add: 6) She mentions her exes way too soon (this will come up at some point, but it should not be during the first few dates) What other red flags should be added to the list?
@jamesmacharia1247
Жыл бұрын
Respect bro 🍻🍻
@sandoristar7597
Жыл бұрын
If she says : I could have whomever I want, but I picked you
@taWay21
Жыл бұрын
Yeah name dropping the ex is a huge red flag. Happened to me recently. Got the hell out of there as fast as I could
@lawrence31415
Жыл бұрын
@@taWay21 yikes, that sucks. But you probably avoided what could have been a bullet full of heartbreak in the long run.
@ferrari2k
Жыл бұрын
4 was the red flag with my ex.... Emotionally and in the bedroom, she was just like a black hole, rarely giving but always wanting attention...
@Ankit-hs9nb
Жыл бұрын
I used to think there is some issue with me but as I see more videos of Courtney I feel I am a totally normal human. Thanks, Courtney for making these videos.
@CourtneyRyan
Жыл бұрын
🤍🥰
@davidabarak
Жыл бұрын
The fact that you're watching videos from someone who's reasonable (gender isn't a factor; it just happens to be Courtney) mean you're not just totally normal, but are motivated to grow and understand other people. A lot of people aren't interested or capable of doing that.
@linnfuller5680
Жыл бұрын
Another red flag I've learned to watch for is someone who shows conditional love or affection depending on the other person's actions or attitudes. For example, a girlfriend who feels that you really love her only when you spend lots of money on her. Then when you don't spend enough money, she pulls back her attention and affection from you. This basically means you only get love when you make her happy first. Conditional reward is a big red flag.
@Bennysol
Жыл бұрын
Just got myself out of that situation. She was only around when I came up with a fun place to go to or when I had a party going on at the house. A casual date or getting something done and she always made an excuse as to why she couldn't make it
@danielbueno251
Жыл бұрын
A red flag I wanna add: if she's super receptive and nice to YOU yet either mistreats or ghosts other men that she doesn't like like that. IMO one of the many determining factors of a quality woman is how she treats those she's NOT interested in
@andersnielsen6044
Жыл бұрын
All this an adult man would do his research on even before he starts dating her.
@steelfanther328
Жыл бұрын
One of my ex-GFs emigrated to the US and married an American guy ... But after a while he divorced her because she was a communist ... There were too many red flags everywhere ... - Moscow, Russia
@keithupton86ku
Жыл бұрын
I love it😂
@JosueExplores
Жыл бұрын
I remember being sober for a year for personal reasons, and the girl I was dating was a heavy drinker. I didn’t mind hanging out at the bar with her and a Diet Coke, but she wouldn’t stop asking me “so you’re really not drinking??” I got tired of repeating myself after a couple of months and dipped.
@Dman425
Жыл бұрын
I'm sure you had no issues with dipping your thing in her though😂
@jedisentinel1499
Жыл бұрын
Then she did you a favor brother and not worth your time. Stick to your guns.
@lawrence31415
Жыл бұрын
I would definitely like to see a video about why you don't drink and your experiences with dating people who do, Courtney. That sounds like an interesting topic!
@waltermyers8891
Жыл бұрын
#boybye #byebye
@PaperRaines
Жыл бұрын
Sounds boring as hell to me. Who cares, drink or don't drink. If you're debating it, you're not compatible. Move, on Personally me, a woman who doesn't drink is a person who is really committed to arbitrary boundaries for their own comfort, and that's not something that's not attractive to me. But, it will be to another man, so ✌🏾👋🏾 🤷🏾
@MH-br3th
Жыл бұрын
Ohhh the not drinking one! I've never heard anybody bring that up, but I've experienced it a few times. Usually things will just fizzle out if that's an issue. You also want to avoid any situations where you're sober and she's not, for obvious reasons. Another one that I watch out for is women who are obsessed with their birthdays. Not saying someone shouldn't want to have a nice time, but I've seen some alarming behavior if things don't go her way on that special day... Also run run run if you ever hear the phrase "my birthday month" it's a red flag on top of a pile of red flags!
@alastairthegreat2887
Жыл бұрын
The "my birthday month" is definitely a massive red flag.
@bobross1829
Жыл бұрын
Ohh yes this one! If a woman is over age 25 and says it is my birthday month! It is a HUGE red flag
@mariadominguez7207
Жыл бұрын
Why? I mean i coukd be annoying but red flag? Maybe she really kikes her birthday
@asdax8311
Жыл бұрын
The red flags can be summarized as high investment with low return.
@Larry-hy5rm
Жыл бұрын
I have had women on dating sites say "if you really liked me, you would send me $50" or whatever. You can't buy peoples affections. If you can, you need to run away, lol 😆
@brianwaller7383
Жыл бұрын
I’ve gotten that and my rebuttal was “if you really liked me you wouldn’t ask for money”
@Abmarp
Жыл бұрын
Oh dear
@Larry-hy5rm
Жыл бұрын
@@brianwaller7383 Exactly, and they never heard from me again, lol
@wizeguy2388
Жыл бұрын
I recently met a girl who was my friend's friend and she said she was going on a date with this guy later, and said that he's been sending her money. My friend asked her if she takes it and she said "well yea, I'm not dumb". It's so crazy that in 2023 that women are insanely obsessed with money from men
@theartofwar1750
Жыл бұрын
Bruv, they are just using you. No women who is interested would do that.
@ArcSpidr
Жыл бұрын
Id definitely love a "why you dont drink" video! I think we all need more content that pushes back on drinking culture
@cityman2312
Жыл бұрын
Red Flags from my personal experience and observations. Real Red Flags - Warning signs in women that everyone should take seriously. (1) Cruel to animals (2) Trivialises sexual abuse in any way at all (3) Shows contempt towards disabled people in any way at all (4) Shows sadistic tendencies of any kind (5) Attacks her friends for no reason (6) Wants to have a baby on the first date (7) Pressures me for s3x on the first date (8) Touches me without permission (9) Is combative/aggressive (10) Is prone to sudden bursts of rage (11) Is disparaging about other women (12) Is disparaging about all men (13) Is rude to kids
@poeticeclipse
Жыл бұрын
this sounds like red flags in all humans hahha
@exothermal.sprocket
Жыл бұрын
The root sin of all of this is pride.
@josesantana770
Жыл бұрын
Prisons are full of people with most of these tendencies. Most of them are men.
@j.m.9047
Жыл бұрын
Another red flag that should be mentioned is if she airs out her dirty laundry online. It’s become more common place with the whole Jonah Hill and Bebe Rexha incidents among others. There is a woman I follow on Instagram who, through her Instagram stories, discusses potential red flags to look for as a means of educating women on potential narcissists/toxic men. Despite her vast knowledge on the subject, she consistently complains about how she is always talking to/going on dates with men who turn out to be narcissists or toxic in some way, claiming on many occasions how men are snakes or men are the enemy. Mind you, she is in her early forties
@theartofwar1750
Жыл бұрын
The not drinking thing is really interesting especially if you grew up in a culture where drinking is forbidden or frowned down upon like Muslim culture. A lot of girls on Tinder literally have in their profile that if you don't drink, then swipe left. Its sad that some people equate being social to drinking and don't know how to interact with people without alcohol. I've worked at companies where people literally could not communicate unless they had alcohol. While I participated, I hated it, and hated the people who made me do it. Its a sad existence IMO. My rule is to stay away from those who impose requirements on you. Besides, do you want to be in a relationship with a person who is a functioning alcoholic? If they look good now, they won't later!
@oza1302
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for mentioning the drinking thing. This, along with all (or most) of the points, comes back to, in part, living a relationship based on others experiences. Even before social media this was a thing and it’s only gotten worse. Ugh! Have a mind and value system of your own.
@FrostedSeagull
Жыл бұрын
Smartest Comments here !
@gregolonious
Жыл бұрын
If she's confused about what she wants, don't fly her to Paris, send her a link to a psychologist.
@kevinc1593
Жыл бұрын
@CourtneyRyan, I don’t drink either and found that even friendships can be miss aligned by this value. I’m okay with other making their choices (moderation being the key for me) and should be able to expect them to respect my choices.
@francisbonin1952
Жыл бұрын
4 and 5 were constantly happening with my ex girlfriend. It made the relationship feel like such a chore, it was horrible. Guys, if 4 and 5 keep happening, leave her, don't lose your time.
@bobross1829
Жыл бұрын
I am friends with a woman who is fantastic looking, but single at 36 and she constantly posts memes like "if you do not make more money than me, look better than me, have more status than me, there is nothing to be attracted to." But then she also says that same kind of guy must take care of her and "be able to handle her". And she constantly whines about never being married. She is unable to see that her attitude is precisely why she is single. The guys she wants does not exist. Even if you find a super alpha guy that meets the wealth and looks criteria, they certainly are so attractive they have zero desire to take care of you and put up with your crap. Alpha guys do not need that kind of woman.
@jsalga
Жыл бұрын
For me it's not that she wants me to drink but just dealing with her makes me wanna drink😂🍺...RED FLAG with a BLACK FLAG....
@TheDanster4
Жыл бұрын
As a woman who doesn't drink, I definitely prefer a man that also doesn't drink. Maybe the only exception would be if he drinks on Thanksgiving, New Year's, or his birthday, but it still depends.
@kevinsamson1693
Жыл бұрын
What if he doesn’t drink at all
@nosywendigo592
Жыл бұрын
Or if he's really depressed, he needs to drink a six pack once in a long blue moon to get over it?
@TheDanster4
Жыл бұрын
@@kevinsamson1693 I think that's perfectly fine.
@TheDanster4
Жыл бұрын
@@nosywendigo592 I feel like there could be a healthier way to cope.
@nosywendigo592
Жыл бұрын
@@TheDanster4 definitely not truly healthy in the long run but for me, it cured my depression after I underwent deep sleep and woke up feeling refreshed. That or ice cream.
@TheBatman327
Жыл бұрын
Hello there from Youngstown! Congratulations on your marriage Courtney! God Bless! ❤
@CourtneyRyan
Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much ❤️
@drishy94303
Жыл бұрын
#1 for me is her having expectations / standards that she does not herself live up to
@SOULJAJOE010
Жыл бұрын
I don't drink either. But I would eat food if it just so happens to have alcohol in it, which is pretty much never. Main reason I don't drink is because it just doesn't work well with bodybuilding, at least for me
@ajtaylor8750
Жыл бұрын
Any woman that has a problem with a guy not drinking is probably an alcoholic herself, or wants to feel less insecure about drinking because she probably thinks it's not cool but doesn't want to feel lesser than for drinking. I'm not a drinker and don't find it necessary, but I don't judge women that do drink yet I have received backlash when I turn down drinks from certain people because they think that I believe I'm better than them.
@Bennysol
Жыл бұрын
I was at a bar a few years back. A girl came up to me and told me that her friend wanted to buy me a shot. I said that I drove so I'm not doing any shots tonight. I could go for a beer though. Without saying a word she got up and left. She went back to her table of 3 girls. They sat around for at least another hour but never got up or talked to anyone else. A part of me thought that maybe, just maybe, her friend was going to come back with a beer for me. But At that point in my life (26 years old) nothing surprised me anymore. And the result was what I expected to happen. Apparently a guy turning down a shot is a deal breaker for modern girls. In my mind if I was a girl and wanted to buy him a shot and he made the responsible choice would make me more interested in him. But case and point girls chase the bad guys. I'm 32 now. Have a 2,800 square foot house on 4 acres of land, 3 vehicles, tons of gardens, animals, and pets. Life is good.
@nykia31
Жыл бұрын
She's into astrology.
@didamnesia3575
Жыл бұрын
#6 she compares your masculinity to other men. Tell her to kick rocks and be with them
@whtshark691
Жыл бұрын
I'm not compatible with people that need validation by receiving gifts from others. I do give gifts to others and myself...but these are small, cheap, useful, thoughtful, meaningful and from the heart. I place more value on relationships that value the simple and the small, and I believe that people that want large, less useful, less thoughtful, less meaningful and not from the heart things... should work to get those things themselves. I value teaching children this from a very young age.
@Strive1324L
Жыл бұрын
I don't drink, and that's a GOOD thing. You avoid a LOT of problems. Drinking alcohol will ruin you, and cost you everything in the end.
@andersnielsen6044
Жыл бұрын
To me the biggest red flag in a woman is if she promise me something and then forget it or ignore that she promised it... And then makes defensive arguments like "I did not think that you remembered or that it was such a big thing"..
@michaeljjt1976
Жыл бұрын
I'm a bartender. And I don't drink. Really. (outside of the occasional taste of something I make) None of my friends have a problem with it, much like I don't have a problem with them drinking. It always bugs me how girls' dating profiles are so focused on alcohol, and it's always been a huge red flag when I meet a girl out and they need to know why I'm just drinking water (in a critical/condescending way). It's because I don't need alcohol to be social. It's not a crutch for me.
@theartofwar1750
Жыл бұрын
Similar experience. Weak girls hate strong men. It reminds them of how weak they are.
@YouTubehndl
Жыл бұрын
A real red flag is when she has guy friends. But you have guy friends too so yeah….
@LatimusChadimus
Жыл бұрын
Yeah but she's not bringing anybody alone, she is a normal healthy adult and not like the common basic woman you find outside everywhere
@YouTubehndl
Жыл бұрын
@@LatimusChadimus Courtney has said in the past that she has guy friends and that she thinks it’s ok. Give it 5-7 years and her relationship with her fiancé won’t work out
@lawrence31415
Жыл бұрын
A woman having guy friends does not necessarily make her a red flag. If, however, she is talking and/or hanging out with her guy friends more often than you, then that's a sign that she is not all that serious about you.
@marcosirsav3860
Жыл бұрын
Could you make a video about being friends with an ex or having a ex that's a bff.
@markcarr5142
Жыл бұрын
I enjoy have a few beers with my friends. Gives us time to just sir around and bullshit, catch up with how shitty our boss' are, what or wives and husbands are up to, and just cheers to our so called life. MY wife doesn't drink, and it's always been a sticking point with her. Just because I enjoy the company of my friends, doesn't mean I need to drink to enjoy their company.
@kevinsamson1693
Жыл бұрын
We’ll just make ur ur not pressuring ppl to drink
@mar4kl
Жыл бұрын
"She criticizes you for not drinking." - I've long said that if you meet someone at a bar, there's one thing you know about them right away, and that is that they like to drink. If you're not so enthusiastic about drinking, try looking elsewhere for a boyfriend or girlfriend. "If he wanted to, he would." - This strikes me as a variant of "If he really loved you, he would do X for you." Fill in the X with whatever it is that the person saying this thinks the guy should do.
@armandodelacruz3794
Жыл бұрын
Many people freak out when they find out I don't drink alcohol. Some of them don't hang out with me for the fact that I don't drink. The reason I don't drink is for personal reasons many won't understand. It's a lonely world for a guy like me who keeps his values and morals. I've seen how alcohol has destroyed people and I don't want to be in that category.
@dannyleo5787
Жыл бұрын
As someone who has seen alcoholism destroy a life, I can 100% vouch that this red flag is earned. It hurts more knowing you tried to stop it many times, yet the demon of trauma and psychological abuse is a strong swimmer, no matter how much one tries to drown it would always find its way… even to the end. I have demons too but I learned that I have to accept what I went through, what I still struggle to do. Only remedy that’s worked for me has been discipline, self control, be a man for a family he still holds dearly to prevent another horror that the world decides to through.
@andrewszymanski3578
Жыл бұрын
One part that I don’t agree with is that relationships are rarely 50/50. It should NEVER be that. There became this saying of happy wife, happy life. When it should always be happy spouse, happy house. That basically indicates that it is actually 100/100 with both giving 100% effort into the relationship. Because even if you split the household responsibilities, like chores as an example, it always seems to build resentment on one end at the bare minimum. It’s usually on both ends though.
@fitforfreelance
Жыл бұрын
These are great reasons not to hang out with another person, altogether
@colinh9294
Жыл бұрын
Hello Courtney, This isn't explicitly related to this video, but can you create a video on why the marriage, and child birth rates have decreased. I'd love to get a young female perspective on it. As I have read books by Jonathan Haidt, and Jean Twenge, but they are older. Im a Millennial and I'd love to hear a younger perspective. And perhaps you could bring your interview friends back for that video.
@poeticeclipse
Жыл бұрын
35 year old woman here. I'd say that more women want to make sure they're financially independent before they get married or have children. Relationships often don't work out... and if a woman starts a relationship with a man when she isn't secure herself, it's a scary position to be in if the relationship fails. We also have to consider economic difficulties the last 10 years, especially. That's hard on everyone. I think for a long time women felt like they HAD to procreate and didn't have a choice. It was the societal expectation. Women are now realizing if they don't want to, they don't have to. Being childless is a choice and it's totally healthy. This is especially true if someone in a couple struggles with mental health issues... and that's becoming more and more prominent as well.
@colinh9294
Жыл бұрын
@@poeticeclipse thanks for your detailed response, it was well thought out. I value your perspective, it features some thoughts that I have heard others echo. I am a 33yr old man, and I have a great relationship with my 35yr sister who informed me that in the past, marriage was more like a necessity, and a survival instinct for women, however now it is more of a choice for several reasons. 1) the world is a safer place now 2) younger females outearn younger men in the current world. (It is more of an intelligence, rather than a physical based economy.) Which has been the case for a while, however in the past a woman's earning potential was basically capped, or declined when they had children, whereas the man's still increased when they had an offspring. However, I would like to ask about the second point you made because that is the confusing part to me. Psychology 101 tells us that we are all social creatures, and interacting with others makes us happy. (It has to be in the physical world as various studies have shown us that the virtual world does not create similar emotions.) Are women truly deciding that they do not want relationships, marriage, and children because of potential financial struggles, when various studies have shown that being a part of a family, and overall unit makes both sexes happy? By the way this wasn't an attack, just trying to get opinions, as my sis and I have spoken various times about how the quality of a large amount of young men has stagnated.
@wayne.l.thompson60
Жыл бұрын
“You’re the guy, so you should (insert some unilateral expectation they have that keeps you completely invested in the relationship and gives them an excuse to easily exit the relationship when they’re no longer into it).” e.g., “You’re the guy, so you should always text me first.” “You’re the guy, so you should put up with my moodiness and soothe my emotions.” “You’re the guy, so you should be ok when I go out without you but when you go out without me, you’re obviously cheating.”
@WriterProfessor
Жыл бұрын
Another big red flag is a cavalier attitude towards credit and credit card spending. 💳 🚩
@Harikejn
Жыл бұрын
Important things: 0:23 First Thing - She Has A Problem With You Not Drinking; 1:58 Second Thing - If You Wanted To You Would; 4:44 Agree with that - We must a mature adult (either we talk about men, either we talk about women); 5:12 Third Thing - She Expresses Criticism More Than Affirmation; 6:02 Make balance between constructive criticism and positive reinforcement; 6:20 Fourth Thing - She Takes More Than She Gives; 7:57 Fifth Thing - She's Consistently Inconsistent; and 9:38 To summarize all the told here. Among the mentioned here things I might add few things such as: 6. Asking for gift cards (or credit cards at email), but not accepting to see each other somewhere in public; 7. Avoiding to give the answers, which sometimes is followed with either lying, or either doing a seen, or just simply not giving the answer at all about the crucial life things (I understand that there are things that you have to keep to yourself, but with crucial things, there shouldn't be no lying, or not giving the answer or answers). Courtney, that's your private thing why aren't you drinking. I'm a man who doesn't drink, and people accepted me for who am I. And that's quite normal, cause that's who you are in your head, and in your heart (being yourself I mean). How would they say in the series and movies: "That's the spirit." It's quite normal to be authentic, and that is for full respect. The authentic behavior can be used in any life situations, and also can be at either men, or women. That's who you are, and that's not lying to yourself. Be authentic, and everything will be OK.
@Mactakun
Жыл бұрын
Lmao number 6 is Indian scammers asking for gift cards over email
@Harikejn
Жыл бұрын
@@Mactakun The scammers are from India?! OMG, I didn't know that. Did you also experienced these hackers?
@wrongplanet1957
Жыл бұрын
Yep i dont mind drinking with you n starting with you, but one of us is not drinking n gonna get us home, but i hate to run into those girls i know and already shit faced, n then ready to talk , last call,
@ninjapirate123
Жыл бұрын
She uses social media too much could also be a red flag
@krink084
10 ай бұрын
A big one for me is punctuality. If a woman is consistently late, I start to feel that they don't value my time or the time we have to spend together.
@dedeborya9015
Жыл бұрын
I don't drink - I will have the coffee - no booze when I moto. Never, Ever. No gift shaming - no favor begging - no attention pandering - no clout blackmail / if she is more drama / nag than fun - she meets the curb / gets ghosted / gets nuked - Mirror and Match, with extreme compliance ... they find out quickly - it isn't fun. No- No- Drama, I don't like Drama
@dedeborya9015
Жыл бұрын
My RED FLAGS - Single Mothers, Tats, Smokers, Drugs, Nose Ring, Liberal, Feminazis, Rainbow colored hair, vegans, anti-gun, anti-motorcycle, 'pronouns' and Americans - all instant NO-GO zones for me.
@LatimusChadimus
Жыл бұрын
Yeah, Some cases, but these women are not worth it, the vast majority of modern women are common basic bishhes and they are most certainly not queens, and if she is going to play games the man she once will move on to a more pleasant woman that is not playing games
@robb4394
Жыл бұрын
#11 Nearly every woman you had on your channel didn't want a blue collar worker when you gave them the "would you rather."
@poeticeclipse
Жыл бұрын
Did you watch that video? Many of them said that blue collar guys can actually make a good amount of money and are great partners.
@robb4394
Жыл бұрын
@@poeticeclipse Yes I watched the video. The question was asked if you would take a blue collar worker who made more than a white collar worker and the overwhelming majority of the women wanted the white collar worker who made less.
@gc4644
Жыл бұрын
Has anyone ever told you you would make a great Morticia Addams?
@Frostyrnb77
Жыл бұрын
When she judges you on what you're eating and says ew. Huge red flag, as it shows she's judgmental and not willing to learn I'm someone who's never drank alcohol, smoke, rarely go to parties, and hate the smell of weed. I get rejected left to right xD
@jacobtani9785
Жыл бұрын
I haven’t been rejected yet for those reasons but I expect to in the future as the dating world is getting more picky and delusional by the day. So I can relate to u in a sense because I don’t like those things either.
@Frostyrnb77
Жыл бұрын
@@jacobtani9785 Amen! Usually I get rejected, because I'm Asian or a midget (5'9) in west coast. Its difficult mate, but there are other things too focus on
@jacobtani9785
Жыл бұрын
@@Frostyrnb77 I’m Asian and 5’6. I just probably haven’t experienced as much excuses as u that’s all.
@Bennysol
Жыл бұрын
I was at a bar a few years back. A girl came up to me and told me that her friend wanted to buy me a shot. I said that I drove so I'm not doing any shots tonight. I could go for a beer though. Without saying a word she got up and left. She went back to her table of 3 girls. They sat around for at least another hour but never got up or talked to anyone else. A part of me thought that maybe, just maybe, her friend was going to come back with a beer for me. But At that point in my life (26 years old) nothing surprised me anymore. And the result was what I expected to happen. Apparently a guy turning down a shot is a deal breaker for modern girls. In my mind if I was a girl and wanted to buy him a shot and he made the responsible choice would make me more interested in him. But case and point girls chase the bad guys. I'm 32 now. Have a 2,800 square foot house on 4 acres of land, 3 vehicles, tons of gardens, animals, and pets. Life is good.
@katenicholson4152
Жыл бұрын
Hey, that’s me!
@bijanthegr91
Жыл бұрын
I don't drink at all. This non-negotiable. The reason being it's a childhood trauma, and I can't stand people who drink excessively. If they're drunks, my anxiety and panic attack starts to kick in, and honestly I would bail from the situation. The rest of the red flags, glad you brought them up, and thanks to you, I am able to see any red flags and can act accordingly. Mostly I'll politely decline her and wish her a good day/night. I have absolutely no tolerance towards how rude she is. Which I do consider these Red Flags as rude and shows she's a complete waste of my time. If I want something serious, don't waste my time. Sorry if this comes off as Egotistical, these are my standards and I will not change it no matter how attractive she presents herself. Though, my other red flag that I am cautious about are certain aspects when evaluating a potential partner. One important factor is how she presents herself, both in clothing and personality. If she dresses provocatively, seeking attention rather than displaying seriousness. Moreover, it's concerning if she is overly flirtatious, overly attached to her phone, and appears interested in other guys during our date. Another critical point is the substance of our conversations. I'm looking for someone who can engage in meaningful discussions and hold my interest. Having a unique perspective is a huge bonus, particularly if she shares an interest in art, films, and books. On the other hand, if she can't offer stimulating conversations, she won't stand out from the other women I've encountered in the past.
@katejohnson5083
Жыл бұрын
I’m a woman and I agree with all of your points. Standards are good. Don’t settle.
@AnteGV1950
Жыл бұрын
That is this Internet generation...if you like someone, you will buy house for her, a guy on Tiktok did!!!total bs...they don't live on earth, they are online!!!
@wizeguy2388
Жыл бұрын
If she wanted to take me to France and buy me a fancy car, she would
@LatimusChadimus
Жыл бұрын
There are 7 forms of abuse, and, depending on the context, criticism can cover 3 of them
@seijicole8302
Жыл бұрын
You should cover things like this about women who have kids too. There’s a lot of horrible single mothers out here that dudes fall for and end up being used and taken advantage of.
@Bill_Riser
Жыл бұрын
Great video Courtney. In your last point you mentioned the phrase "Genuine Interest". I was wondering if you have a video delving into the subject of differentiating between a woman's genuine interest verses feigned interest? If not, I would love to see you go in depth on this particular subject in a future video.
@ImporovementhNation92
Жыл бұрын
I recently had a woman call me weird and a “alcoholic” because I didn’t want to drink or “get drunk” with her. Stated to her it’s not weird it’s my preference and I’m able to enjoy myself/ have fun without consuming alcohol and ended the date. To be honest it’s very discouraging to know it’s women out her like that and understandable why some don’t date anymore due to some behaviors these days. To end on a positive note, us men who are still looking, just continue looking for someone who is aligned with your values, morals and lifestyle. Most of all be patient and continue learning and growing into the best version of yourself.
@groth1m
Жыл бұрын
The “if he wanted to, he would” comment to me sounds like a form of gaslighting.
@nobodysperfect06
Жыл бұрын
I feel this changed my mindset and perspective on talking to or interacting with women, I read it on a forum, I thought the guy hit the nail right on the head. It changed my perspective and mindset on talking to women. A guy was asking for advice on how to get better at talking to women, and people used the word practice "It bothers and annoys, enrages me or pisses me off a lot when people use the word practice, because the way I see it, for women, there is no such thing as practicing talking to men, because women's lives are on autopilot when it comes to talking to men since puberty, due to all of the constant attention they've been getting since then, women are forced to, have no choice but to learn how to talk to men, and they gain it right away by doing nothing since they don't have to open their mouth first" I thought to myself, never truer words have been said or spoken. I thought that was bang-on right there. and i got a response from a dating coach on youtube, which enraged and pissed me off more, while I don't disagree with him, I just don't like how he said the brutal cold harsh fact of how different for men and women when it comes to getting better at talking to and interacting with the opposite sex. It makes sense and I like to believe there is far more advice for guys in the world on how to talk to and interact with girls then there is advice for girls on how to talk to and interact with guys. He said: "Don't worry about what other people don't have to do or why something is easier for them or whatever the comparison may be. Focus on you, where you want to be, what you need to do to get there and then get moving." That pissed me off more when I read that. Another reason why I don't like it is because it feels or seems like the way a guy talks and interacts with people or a guy's social skills, the way he behaves around others, has a much bigger impact on his attractiveness or ability to get a girlfriend then the other way around. As in, the way a girl talks or a girl's social skills doesn't impact her attractiveness or ability to get a boyfriend as much as it does for a guy to get a girlfriend. Men need to focus more on the behavioral aspect than women do when it comes to attracting someone it seems. The main reason why i hate that, is because guys, men, can unfortuneately be labeled creepy or weird in interactions or social situations with women, even if the guy, man, never meant any harm, was never trying to hurt the woman, the reverse isn't true though. And due to men always having been expected to walk up to women and open our mouth, it makes more sense for the man to need to practice but not the woman. If an interaction or conversation goes poorly or bad between a man and a woman,. It's always the guys fault, it's impossible for a woman to screw up a conversation or interaction with a guy, it seems. Yeah I'm not afraid to admit that there have been times in my life I have hated being born male due to how for all time men have had to do everything in dating and courtship and seduction, relationships, etc. I get more pissed off in and raised when people say us men are supposed to feel lucky or grateful for being born a man, or that we men have it better than women do in dating.
@Cee_Eff
Жыл бұрын
So true
@spicymickfool
Жыл бұрын
Red flags I look out for are typically subtle indicators of narcissism and toxic emotional problems. 1) If you describe a situation where a spouse mistreated her husband because of, say Borderline Personality Disorder, and her response is "BPD isn't so bad" and doesn't express sympathy for the non-BPD person. 2) If she is woke, decent sign of emotional issues. 3) If her literary interests include few works from before she was born or only fantasy novels. 4) A college degree which is non-STEM and non-Business oriented. I respect the Liberal Arts quite a bit, but they have been too politicized. 5) Prone to logical fallacies in defending a political thesis. 6) Poor relationship with father.
@oliverpetroski4205
Жыл бұрын
Huge 🚩 is when she demands sponsorship based "relationship" and wants standards which she herself is not filling them alone. For all we know those special romantic trips are faked, photoshopped or are sponsored by some travel company aka other person than her "boyfriend". Many of the so called influencers have been exposed as fakers already. What's sad is how many women nowdays are falling for the fake news.
@jacobtani9785
Жыл бұрын
I don’t drink, vape, smoke weed or cigs, do drugs, go clubbing, nor want or have any tattoos. If a woman is pressuring me to do these things, imma walk away faster than u can blink your eye. I don’t want to be like everyone else, I want to be WHO I want to be, NOT what u want me to be.
@nosywendigo592
Жыл бұрын
I think the same as you.
@johngonzalez4298
Жыл бұрын
Have a wonderful day, Courtney! 🐪 ❤
@CourtneyRyan
Жыл бұрын
You too John! 🤍
@Michael.likes.horsepower
Жыл бұрын
She takes more than she gives… that’s every single girl I have ever dated. I remember asking the last girl I dated to pay for a couple dinners after I paid for the first 7 dates in a row and she was upset saying, “I’m not trying to keep score here” Duh, you’re not trying to keep score because you don’t want to point out that I’m paying for every thing we do while you expect a free ride.
@spencer_jackson542
Жыл бұрын
I would add #6 she asks what you want to have for dinner, want to watch on tv, want to do this weekend etc and no matter what the guy says, she goes "nah, I don't wanna do that"
@Ezilla82
Жыл бұрын
Yep, I'm good without drinking alcohol because lost my youngest brother 3 years ago from it. But yeah I do like to know what women do that are consider red flags from Courtney so that I don't end up losing my damn mind.
@robertfreestone414
22 күн бұрын
She asks very anxiously: "Hey! Who's your FRIEND!"[As Henry Cavill is signing your autograph book]
@machinesofgod
Жыл бұрын
I haven't had alcohol for nine years. I didn't have a problem, but decided to follow a spiritual practice from India. I would love to see a video on why you don't take alcohol. Thank you for the awesome videos! Courtney is the sister who os seriously looking oit fornus gentlemen 🙂
@annonymouslibertairian9120
Жыл бұрын
First. Proudly 14 months sober. My only regret is I didn't do it sooner. Secondly, because of my background and past, I do look at drinking/drinkers differently. And I can recognize a problem drinker from a casual drinker. And I know who to avoid.
@nerifterafrnam4682
Жыл бұрын
Keep it up bro, myself 4 years come mid November.
@katejohnson5083
Жыл бұрын
I prefer to date non-drinkers. But because the dating pool is limited, I felt I had to make room for “social drinking.” The problem is, this can be defined so many ways. What would you say are the biggest red flags that tell you if someone is a problem drinker? I recently met someone and they drink every time we go out. I realize I’m proving limited information, but should I be worried?
@petergorm
Жыл бұрын
I have asked myself this question; What exactly is it that I would need a woman for? I can't answer that question. So I am extremely content in my own skin. I am not trying to reel in a woman. To be honest, I am not interested. I have nothing to offer a woman, in the first place. For a lot of you guys, ask yourself the question; Why do I really want a woman arround, and what is that I can offer a woman. Is it really that important to have a woman arround? I think it is time to really think about why we want a spouse. Most people will be better of with a pet, and hopefully never reproduce. Like myself. Cheers, Courtney. You do your best, and I enjoy listening.
@Scott-e9v
Жыл бұрын
Men don’t need women, women need men. If more men realized this. There would be far less depressed men
@TheOnlyAndreySotnikov
Жыл бұрын
Ever-single men are 908% more likely to die of infectious diseases than their married counterparts. Though, it's just 3% of all deaths. And the study that claimed that was small.
@prussiansocietyofamerica
Жыл бұрын
Exactly! They are a poor investment. Show me a Woman who has ever demonstrated wanting a Man because they see him first as a friend and enjoy his company? No, it's never this! Instead, they will say they do not date "friends" and they have no qualms about telling you how much they want a "REAL MAN" who protects and provides and has ambition! Ambition also always means money, just like providing and protecting. They hope to perpetually guilt-trip Men into believing his Masculinity is founded upon his ability to provide and protect. But this actually only makes Men weak and deprives them of their health, well-being and happiness, they become slaves in the process. Real Men protect and provide for themselves FIRST. Whatever residual remains he has that he wishes to share with his Woman, that is a privilege she earns, not a right. This is the way it's supposed to be.
@tommygunn6901
Жыл бұрын
To me, if she says " I don't know what to tell you" especially during a difficult time. That to me is an indication she's given up
@AnteGV1950
Жыл бұрын
Girl, you are gorgeous!!!much love from Croatia
@CourtneyRyan
Жыл бұрын
Aww thank you!
@infinitymfg5397
Жыл бұрын
If she falls back onto slogans, catch-phrases, and canned talking points to defend the indefensible. For example. the response to something that is blatantly unfair should not be "protect and provide" regardless of the situation.
@tyronevonchadley
Жыл бұрын
Women's red flags Tattoos Has a problem with you not drinking Tattoos Piercings KZitem Dating coach Girls night out Masculine that would rival your grandfather. "If you wanted to you would" Flirts with every guy in the room. Low cut tops. Freezes eggs. Spits chat. Has Chanel bags. P's standing up. Expresses criticism more than affirmation. Tattoos. Navigates the streets well. She takes more than she gives repeatedly. 😮 Lack of effort and engagement. No emotional support. New piercings. Inconsistent. Zero commitment. Cats, wine. Cheers!
@kylefranklin5409
Жыл бұрын
Your content is absolutely amazing Courtney, im so glad to watch a modern women give a realistic perspective on dating in todays day and age.
@SirenaSpades
8 ай бұрын
Good video, but I would like to point out that many women like to encourage men to plan out the first date or even the first few dates. So women not planning out the very FIRST date, is not an indicator of what you've said here.
@farawayranger8489
Жыл бұрын
You describe my ex in all of your videos :D
@gunnyhatfield2459
Жыл бұрын
1. Covered in tattoos and nose rings. 2. All her friends are male. 3. Vulgar in speech, constant use of the F-word and other curse words. I don't have issue with curse words but when its every other word. What a complete turn off for me. 4. Has nothing positive to say about her friends and family, we have a friend who is seeing a woman, she will talk bad about someone to a group of us and when someone leaves from our group she will talk bad about them. Happens all the time. I keep my distance from her, because I know she talks bad about me and everyone else.
@cfnaround1585
4 ай бұрын
Problem is, in my experience, women take feedback as criticism. No I’m just telling you something you are doing is bothering me.
@tehlaziness
Жыл бұрын
A scenario that needs to be added to the "if you wanted to, you would" point are women that actively prevent you from doing something for them, and then say this about the thing they prevented you from doing. My ex used to do that crap all the time. On top of almost every other thing Courtney talked about here...
@lilowoof
5 ай бұрын
As someone who uses the "if he wanted to, he would" phrase, I really like the example you used for it and how toxic it can be. My usage was for the fact that I was getting neglected/shunned and begging for change, and it helped me to detach from the bad relationship, and to leave. BUT if it was used to try and justify getting a paid vacation or expensive gifts? Nah man, you need to run from anyone who uses it for not important things XD
@davidjacobs7465
Жыл бұрын
A few more to note: 1) She has girls nights out. 2) Travels for work or is always working overtime. 3) Has no father or father figure. 4) All her friends are feminists and /or single (mothers). 5) Has guy friends and maybe even a guy best friend.
@bmcvay80
10 ай бұрын
If you wanted to, you would...... You're right. I don't want to. Maybe your entitled attitude has something to do with it. There's the door. I personally don't drink, not for any reason other than I just don't find it enjoyable. I may have one every couple years. Really just couldn't care less. If someone wants to drink, cool. If you do it excessively, no thanks. I'm not your designated driver. lol
@jamesdanton9033
Жыл бұрын
Yeah, but what if it's behaviour that is worthy of change? Just blanketly saying that you have no areas for improvement that other people might like is crazy. Everyone has areas where if they made changes people would be more likeable. I mean, you wear make-up for social approval, so...?
@ted-nelek-ne8tf
Жыл бұрын
Usually a person does not drink for one of 2 reasons A Religious reason -- related to their spiritual beliefs. A health issue -- related to their medical record in the past So God forbid Courtney, which one from the above describes your "Not drinking" situation? I have a feeling that in the past you may have took a drink or two or been drinking occasionally
@gajananjoshi404
Жыл бұрын
Yes, I loved this informative video Courtney Ryan ....
@bennero446
4 ай бұрын
These are copied and pasted additions that I left on lawerence's post down below, after he provided a 6th red flag statement from women. I figured it may be beneficial to post them up top here too. 7) She spends almost the entirety of your first few dates whining about her personal problems and pushing you to give her advice instead of showing any interest in you as a person. This is a major red flag, as it means she is just trying to use you as a personal therapist free of charge. 8) She tells you how much she loathes men and goes into extended rants about what assholes they all are. This is a ginormous red flag, because one type of woman to avoid are the fourth wave feminists, unless you happen to be a natural simp who enjoys being emasculated. It also indicates that she is primarily attracted to jerks and vents by taking out her frustrations on decent guys that show an interest in her. 9) If she immediately changes the subject or just giggles nervously whenever you flirt with her. This is a big red flag because it indicates that she may just be using you for attention and doesn't actually ever want to go "too far" with you. If your subtle flirtations make her nervous and she does not reciprocate, and she never flirts with you first, then you are likely just giving her validation until a guy she is actually attracted to comes along.
@johncoviello8570
11 ай бұрын
Guys (and gals), be careful who you settle down with. Even if you were into drinking when you were younger, met your significant other you might not want to drink and rot your brain when you get older. It can become a big problem if your long-term girlfriend or wife continues to drink like she's in her 20s and you have moved on from drinking heavily.
@dhanrajmohan701
Жыл бұрын
Public comment. I don't smoke and drinking because. I love my values. Serving the true purpose. What matters is moral values and respect and care about each other values.
@andrewnorrey1541
Жыл бұрын
No matter what a man does ALL WOMEN will look down their noses at them. They complain about where are all the good men have gone but never take responsibility for their own selfish actions when they nag and criticise them. Women in 2023 don't recognise a decent man even when he's lying in bed next to them. Example out & about the other day saw this gorgeous girl must be in her late 20's early 30's got everything going for her.. But then noticed she has 3 young kids round her arse.. What a waste of her life. What man would want to take all of that on and commit to a life of misery.. Men stay single and let women do their own thing. They will miss us in the end.
@adelakerr1633
5 күн бұрын
I don’t drink and I don’t have a problem if the guy doesn’t drink.
@bennero446
4 ай бұрын
One thing a woman might say that men often hear them say in regards to your relationship that is an extreme red flag is this: "I'm so confused!" If men ever hear that from a woman when she is discussing the merits vs. demerits for being your girlfriend, you need to run -- not walk -- away! If a woman really loves a man or at least has high interest in him early on, she will never claim to be "confused" over her feelings.
@marcwhite9234
Жыл бұрын
These are good red flags. But truthfully if one is observant both men and women will tell you what they’re all about through their words and actions. If they bad mouth their ex, they’ll eventually bad mouth you. If they’re disrespectful to their family and friends they’ll eventually disrespect you. If they’re on their phone all the time concerned about how their perceived by strangers, they’re unlikely to ever invest in your opinions or what you need. Listen to what people say, and then look at what they do. If they surround themselves with terrible things, that’s what they bring to the table. I once heard Samuel Thayer talk about edible and poisonous plants. Most people poison themselves by trying to make a poisonous plant fit the description of an edible one in their mind. His advice, don’t make it fit. So apply that to who you’re dating, don’t force it, don’t make it fit the fantasy you have in your mind. Reality, it’s better and wastes less time.
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