You don’t defeat humanity. You lull it into apathy. You don’t cow humanity, you sooth it gently. You don’t anger humanity, you distract it with cute and cuddly. Guide humanity with a carrot on a string, and pray that they become blind to all else. The day that humanity wakes up, is the day that something dies. The day that humanity rises, something terrible is born. The day that humanity says no, the universe will bend to make it so. So sing them a lullaby and tuck them in tight, and kiss them sweetly goodnight, and keep them in the dream, or else
@thearnorianruby4681
Жыл бұрын
Or else you shall find great strife.
@christopherandera2039
Жыл бұрын
That is beautiful and terrifyingly 👍
@ADerpyReality
Жыл бұрын
That's why the internet creates ecosystems to aviod challenge and growth. Unless you seek it put in which case the algorithm will give you more to learn. The algorithm will reinforce whatever you started to take interest in it doesn't care. It's a machine for better or worse.
@guardianofthetoasters2323
Жыл бұрын
This... This gave me an inspiration to write something. About an alien civilization trying to delay the eldritch truth, the reality bending of a terrible God but instead of a God, it would be an entire civilization. Waiting to be awaken and bring ruin to the universe
@exumbra1399
Жыл бұрын
How interesting that the greatest persecution, the cruelest perverse atrocities have only driven certain religions to the peak of influence. Curse them, and they bless you. Attack them, and they simply go elsewhere. Kill them, and your own enforcers convert under your nose! The strongest Empires and monarchs have sought to bring them to heel, only for the king to find themself unworthy. However, under the opposite conditions of peace and tranquility, they become complacent, judgmental, and ineffective. It is truly under duress that the best of humanity flourishes. Do not flee from conflict nor stress! Instead seek the greater truths and follow them unto death. For we shall all arrive there one day.
@Iluvantir
Жыл бұрын
"Kicking and screaming and covered in someone else's blood is how I came into this world. I don't mind leaving it in the same way." ~ Old Viking saying... probably...
@queenbee8045
Жыл бұрын
Strangely that was my social media front page intro on every platform until I lost the love of my life.
@hervisdaubeny2591
7 ай бұрын
Conan, its conan the barbarian.
@someoneawesome8717
Жыл бұрын
Humans as a whole are physical embodiments of the phrase "apeshit crazy"
@Sean_XT
Жыл бұрын
Spite and rage, that is what has fueled humanity for millennia
@arandomboot598
Жыл бұрын
Don’t forget an intoxication of one’s choice
@THE--BROKEN--GOD
Жыл бұрын
That's why we made castles for and fortresses
@regialdamanita8392
Жыл бұрын
And it will continue to do so, for all eternity. Dues Vult.
@koathekid8255
11 ай бұрын
@@arandomboot598that just removes mental obstacles to spite and rage
@dragonriderabens9761
Жыл бұрын
4 words 4 words to sum up that speech: "RIP AND FUCKING TEAR"
@Amoth_oth_ras_shash
Жыл бұрын
as death breaths down the neck of the murder monkies.... the beast of war rumbles ,and hears them seeking its rage.... and offers it eagerly to fill their hearts and minds...
@britishneko3906
Жыл бұрын
if humanity was a single being it would be a being that has two sides eternal spite and eternal stupidity
@wincentwass5818
Жыл бұрын
I could imagine that the colony world had a very diverse culture with many languages and traditions so when they charge they sing songs of their native tongues, it would be beautiful to see a Russian a German and a Frenchman charge side-by-side and scream at the top of their lungs, a battle cry in there own language it’s poetic in the way
@Liethen
Жыл бұрын
Would be funnier if instead they had half a culture and 3/8ths of a language so that they charge the enemy singing a garbled mess of Russian, German and French, missing half the words sounding like a skipping phonograph
@wincentwass5818
Жыл бұрын
@@Liethen that would indeed be very funny
@damiennightmaresx7950
Жыл бұрын
i still want aa video of every language that exsists to sing not in any specific laanguage but i want them all to sing a song aat once and hear that creepy all powerful booming voice of chaos thaat you know is saying something but u can only hear what you understand and nothing else-
@riverraven7359
Жыл бұрын
Have you heard 55 days at Peking?
@wincentwass5818
Жыл бұрын
@@riverraven7359 before I posted this comment no. but I watched the movie a few weeks back
@NarwhaI95
Жыл бұрын
You must only fear death if you have not lived a life worth dying for
@Dr.Chibbins
Жыл бұрын
All you were missing from that speech was “NOT ONE STEP BACK!”
@TheRandyWanker
Жыл бұрын
Not a step back, we got Moscow at our back.
@niccatipay
11 ай бұрын
Order 227 is now in effect!
@someoneawesome8717
Жыл бұрын
"Our gender is WAR" I actually like that
@WinterKitsune9915
Жыл бұрын
Yeah
@lenartzsolt1177
Жыл бұрын
Same
@Maxxx5240
11 ай бұрын
“But what’s in your pants?” “Doooom!”
@bunnybootsink9258
Жыл бұрын
I love how he says ?#;@/?;¢$∆¶. He nails the dialect so perfectly.
@delphy2478
7 ай бұрын
rashiwawa
@GuukanKitsune
Жыл бұрын
"If this is to be our end, then we will make of it SUCH an end so as to be worthy of remembrance!"
@maloztoko7262
Жыл бұрын
"Everything that you thought had meaning: every hope, dream, or moment of happiness. None of it matters as you lie bleeding out on the battlefield. None of it changes what a speeding rock does to a body, we all die. But does that mean our lives are meaningless? Does that mean that there was no point in our being born? Would you say that of our slain comrades? What about their lives? Were they meaningless?... They were not! Their memory serves as an example to us all! The courageous fallen! The anguished fallen! Their lives have meaning because we the living refuse to forget them! And as we ride to certain death, we trust our successors to do the same for us! Because my soldiers do not buckle or yield when faced with the cruelty of this world! My soldiers push forward! My soldiers scream out! My soldiers RAAAAAGE!" - Commander Erwin
@donaldscholand4617
Жыл бұрын
From a previous story: (squad leader gestures with his thumb) "Bad guys, feck'em up!"
@michaelyoung7261
Жыл бұрын
And did they ever.
@smileandwave3250
Жыл бұрын
Sounds like the aliens went up against a damn banzai charge at Iwo Jima. O.O
@Zael_Moonblade
Жыл бұрын
Or the Marine charge in the Argonne Forrest of 1918...
@kyriss12
Жыл бұрын
This one reminds me of the story broken agro read. I still go back and listen to that one every now and again.
@samboyd1828
Жыл бұрын
when pushed into a corner, or when in a hysterical state, there's not much a single human couldn't accomplish. now spread that over a whole population and you've got an action that'll make God himself shit his bed
@alganhar1
Жыл бұрын
And what happened to those Banzai charges at Iwo Jima? Oh right, they failed, with massive casualties....
@alganhar1
Жыл бұрын
@@Zael_Moonblade Marines who used tactics the French, British and Germans had abandoned back in 1916 as they were too costly. The American officers refused to learn from the hard won lessons of their allies, because they had 'all the answers'. Turned out they did not. So they used tactics the British and French had stopped using years prior, because apparently the superior fighting quality of the American Soldier was enough to make those tactics work..... It was not. The British Army in the last 6 months of 1918, which was when there was actual significant American ground force involvement, captured more ground, took more prisoners, and captured more artillery pieces and machineguns than the Americans and French COMBINED..... There were a lot of brave men in that war.... many Americans call our leaders stupid for the 'waste' of life, and do not realise how stupid their OWN leaders were for failing to learn the lessons the British and French tried to teach them. Instead they learned the same way as the British and French did, through copious expenditure of blood.....
@larrycachota3289
Жыл бұрын
the speech really felt like captain erwins last speech from AOT
@kristjanmatanovic8722
Жыл бұрын
It literally was but somehow they plagiarised it so badly that it sounded worse then the original
@dave1411
10 ай бұрын
My soldiers RAGE!!
@Talon1124
Жыл бұрын
Story 2: The xenos are approaching the Find Out threshold...
@garysmith3037
Жыл бұрын
What I'm suggesting, honored council, is that we should start planning on ending this war and figuring out a way to make friends with the Humans....while it's still on our terms..
@devilcat9843
Жыл бұрын
You have one chance to make peace. "When we finally took the colony, there were no civilians to capture, except children too small to understand." Return these children to a human world immediately ALIVE AND UNHARMED, because if you don't nothing can save you.
@user-lp3cf5yn5b
Жыл бұрын
@@devilcat9843 I'm not so sure. I believe if we ever are attacked by an extraterrestrial threat and rise up to a point where we can at least hold our own against them there will be no peace until we win and draw at least half as much more blood than they took of ours.
@ianharrison5758
Жыл бұрын
@@devilcat9843 “Humans, remarkably, somehow have a simultaneously reactive and avoidant psychological relationship with their emotions, with some in the population unable to feel, while others are almost supernaturally good at reading the emotions of even separate species. This relationship with their emotional response makes it functionally impossible to gauge the reaction of the species as a whole to any major event. A blow that would destroy the psyche of many species, crushing their ego may simultaneously make some humans furious, others depressed, and worryingly, a large percentage of their population simply divorces emotional from their external reactions entirely. When in such a state, a human may say things such as “it is what it is” or the less intuitive “fuck it we ball”. Do not assume either if these reactions mean anything specific, as the only thing consistent in these individuals is that they bury their emotions internally and do not show outward signs of the subconscious emotional response all sentients have. It is advised to avoid putting a human in this emotional state because an act as simple as unintentional insult to their culture or species may yield no outward response, perhaps they may even laugh to diffuse the tension, while internally they may have already made the decision to “get it back in blood”, and you will not know there response until it happens. However, if there is one action one can take that will provoke a similar response in all of humanity not already deemed a threat to itself is any act that brings even perceived harm to their children. In their penitentiaries, it is often said that those imprisoned for crimes against a child will be brutalized in indescribable ways by humans that have already committed harm to humanity themselves. Murderers and Illicit substance distributors will risk their future freedom to bring justice for a child they do not know. I say this with no hint of sarcasm or humor, no one has ever found out what happens to those who wage war on humanity that target their children, as nothing is ever left to find. Entire empires have been erased from everything but history, and don’t think the humans stop there. We only know what they report in these scenarios, and as many humans see “snitching” as a dishonorable act, it is likely that many of the famous early civilization suicides taught in the galaxy were not just a species that flew too close to the sun. As a human would say it, they fucked around, and they found out”
@MiniCerberus991
6 ай бұрын
@@devilcat9843 "sir, the humans sent a message of run. apparently they found bruises on one of their chi... why is there suddenly a second moon?"
@OriginalUnjustifier
Жыл бұрын
Never has a Xeno heard a more terrifying phrase than 'Humanity, United'.
@jessep1257
Жыл бұрын
Those who run from death, stood still in life... the only true death is to have never lived.
@johnhall1161
Жыл бұрын
Hopelessly addicted to this site
@Mad_Overseer
Жыл бұрын
Same
@Jason-sm4oc
Жыл бұрын
You are not alone.
@mahimahi339
Жыл бұрын
im addicted to his narration like i am addicted to water and air
@vinnyganzano1930
Жыл бұрын
Yep me too.
@rangerdruid7036
Жыл бұрын
Me five. I listen to his stories as I am driving to work.
@scottwilliams846
Жыл бұрын
You picked a fight with the embodiment of *S P I T E*
@dadgod3615
Жыл бұрын
Humanity doesn't care if they win. They just need you to lose.
@diversezebra6754
Жыл бұрын
He was no soldier, but he was a fucking warrior. That is the best description of a human with nothing left but certain death. It is actually scary what humans are capable of.
8 ай бұрын
"Though they take our lives from us, They cannot take the light from us! For those we cherish, We die in glory!" - from the 40K song Lamenters, by Stringstorm.
@Ibian666
Жыл бұрын
Excellent story. Always good to get some proper descriptions of the aliens, their mannerisms etc.
@chillobsidian9592
8 ай бұрын
I felt that Commander Erwin speech lmao. You can see the similarities. Well played.
@ElyonProject
Жыл бұрын
Erwin speech in a HFY? Aww yeeee
@geoshark12
Жыл бұрын
I seriously wonder what will happen when aliens see these stories
@nightrunnerxm393
Жыл бұрын
"Y'know what?" "No, what?" "Suddenly, writing our home coordinates into their wheat fields doesn't seem like it was such a good idea." "Yeah...I wanna keep the murder monkeys as far away as possible, too..."
@ignaciosindhu6779
Жыл бұрын
They would have to wait until Google Translate reach their language first
@geoshark12
Жыл бұрын
@@ignaciosindhu6779 you clearly have not seen dedicated game translators
@alganhar1
Жыл бұрын
Probably either nothing, or they will simply laugh at this genre of Sci Fi. HFY may be highly entertaining, but its also HIGHLY unrealistic. Anyone who thinks otherwise is fooling themselves.
@geoshark12
Жыл бұрын
@@alganhar1 the thing is we don’t actually know what would be realistic , and while i doubt its the case its just as possible as any other possibilities
@reebingreeber
Жыл бұрын
That speech is very reminiscent of Erwins final charge in Attack of Titan
@joelbell6075
Жыл бұрын
So, in summary, we Humans have the rage of a herd of wildebeasts of the African savanna.
@Virtualblueart
Жыл бұрын
I love these alien perspective stories. It's a fun exercise to try imagine how aliens would see us crazy apes.
@arizonabug6493
Жыл бұрын
I ADORED how you did rashafrashas name. Made me laugh every single time.
@andrewstrongman305
Жыл бұрын
Lol, what they'd just picked a fight with would be a humanity unified as never before by the alien enemy. Such an existential threat would be met with extreme prejudice, and if small colonial forces were able to adapt and win engagements just imagine what a united human effort could achieve...
@involuntaryanalysis
Жыл бұрын
Just imagine all the doomsday weapons we'd have stashed away for just such an occasion.
@zinoneus3733
Жыл бұрын
Anxiety ridden apes would like to drop a package within your area, courtesy from the outpost you attacked.
@platinumchromee3191
Жыл бұрын
Humanity: goes full warhammer 40k mode
@chriscelestino6662
Жыл бұрын
just wait till we bust out the geneva checklist
@andrewstrongman305
Жыл бұрын
@@chriscelestino6662 I don't understand your comment. If a civilian colony with minimal defences was wiped out by an alien civilisation, there would be no restrictions on our military response.
@RealArcalian
Жыл бұрын
Greetings Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo Pick a fight with Humans, you may win the battle, but you will lose the war. Also like what you did with the alien's name.
@Tiewaz
4 ай бұрын
The thing about the human's final speech...was talking about reinforcements not reaching them in time. Not that they weren't coming, but that they wouldn't make it in time. They took one colony. Those reinforcements know they won't make it in time. And those back home know (or at least believe) the enemy that took that colony is unlikely to stop at that one colony. If the reinforcements that arrive lose, they will send intel back. If that species wants to survive, they best gather up the surviving human children and hand them over to the reinforcements and apologize like no one has ever apologized before.
@PaulSherman-v3r
Жыл бұрын
The first thought that comes to mind? "Fuck with the Best? Die like the Rest!" The second is for another story; "Company Cook; "Death from within!"
@deus0rcinus889
Жыл бұрын
I got goosebumps listening to the speach from the human leader
@firedirewolf
Жыл бұрын
We got our posterior handed to us yet left an entire generation with PTSD so bad that they beg their government for peace just in an attempt to stop the nightmares, either that or he looked around the internet too long and it gave him a double dose of PTSD lol
@robertstoneking7916
Жыл бұрын
4chan would have left that war leader catatonic.
@firedirewolf
Жыл бұрын
@@robertstoneking7916 would expect that was where he went at some point, but since he was looking for spiritual stuff, maybe not, not like anyone there probably believes in a higher power....
@Monster_Ink
Жыл бұрын
One heck of a speech! Thanks for the narration! For the algorithm!
@vocalsforever
Жыл бұрын
When you put up the sensor noise I just could not help but laugh thank you
@ArchonSG1
Жыл бұрын
Excellent performance. Hope the author continues the story
@westcoaststacker569
Жыл бұрын
Looks to be a one off. Click the link in the description to read more from that author.
@mondum4539
4 ай бұрын
Agro's passion in the narration is astounding. Thank you so much.
@jasperzanovich2504
2 ай бұрын
Ah, I thought that I knew the spirit of that speech. It's the "My soldiers rage"-speech.
@Embertine
Жыл бұрын
One of the few stories that doesn't make humans out to be better than other species in every way.
@Harry-lq5hu
Жыл бұрын
I struggle with the reality of carnage, war, and death humanity has visited upon ourselves. I struggle with the idea of losing even more of humanity against a foe not yet known. This story represents a version of the future I loathe to see. War is hell ! I pray for a future that moves toward spiritual grace for all, but I see that being prepared is a moral imperative for humanity.
@kennethhummel4409
Жыл бұрын
Oh look! People!!! HI, people!!! Live little fishies.
@ladyred9613
Жыл бұрын
Look People, a person! We should say hi! Hi! Hi!
@PewPewCricket
Жыл бұрын
You know what that means! FISH-
@kappitano6891
Жыл бұрын
loved the erwin smith speech
@sleiphnirdrawings
Жыл бұрын
The speech has the same energy as the Ride of the Rohirrim, chanting "death" while charging
@tomsawyer118
Жыл бұрын
Its 12:36am and I'm on my back porch 8 beers deep ready to fight god @18:00😂
@Darkxarcher
Жыл бұрын
COMMANDER ERWIN IS AN INSPIRATION FOREVER
@laughingdragon8858
Жыл бұрын
This is what I'm fecking here for!!! Good show man. HUMANS!FUCKYEA
@A-Literal-Goat
Жыл бұрын
“What the hell had they picked a fight with?” Spite incarnet ofcorse!
@ravenouself4181
9 ай бұрын
Can't pick a fight with Humans without expecting at least 50% of the population to fight back, make it 75% if Humans finally decide that they are in danger and need to fully automate their production lines.
@snidecommenter7117
9 ай бұрын
There is an expression: You can't beat crazy.
@Lord_Azrekahl
Жыл бұрын
This was a MASTERPIECE! Awesome job Agro! 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏
@crayonchomper1180
Жыл бұрын
don't pick a fight with the spiteful rage monkies, you will lose... eventually
@involuntaryanalysis
Жыл бұрын
...and the longer it ensues, the more spiteful we get. Like flechette rounds, and napalm spiteful. Both of which would give any species with an exoskeleton a particularly bad day.
@weroleoify
Жыл бұрын
Humans are the honey badgers of the universe
@deus0rcinus889
Жыл бұрын
Such a good reference
@Obligate.Carnivore
9 ай бұрын
I was saying i am awake now! Almost 5 years ago and someone tried telling me about woke! I am not woke! I am AWAKE! Come take
@ArronRatliff
Жыл бұрын
I fecking love this channel.
@jacobsilva6334
Жыл бұрын
Humanity Greets death as an old friend. Knowing there hour has come. Something the zino should know. Should fear
@macpurdy
Жыл бұрын
For the algorithm and the narrator.
@ericzaborskiy6491
Жыл бұрын
Rage against the dying of the light and my soldiers rage seem like they came from somewhere hmm ;)
@screen2529
Жыл бұрын
That was a very long and edited version of Commander Erwin's final speech
@deus0rcinus889
Жыл бұрын
Great story and great story telling!!
@DamonCummings-yg7ds
7 ай бұрын
We dance with death for so long every human knows its song young and old weak and strong death is a friend we all know we don't fear her for she is a mother for without death life has no Purpose for death is only a beautiful being
@bobsterclause342
Жыл бұрын
Bor, you finally put the claims and points together. Thanks. I have to agree to. thanks. it was enlightening. So much better
@PervyAutomaton
11 ай бұрын
Good one, for once we are weak, but insane :D
@mattbrown5511
Жыл бұрын
Don't poke the homicidal Space Apes.
@gogogadgetextendosausage9097
Жыл бұрын
Bro why is nobody talking about that name in the begining and how absolutely spot on it was 💀💀
@dantreadwell7421
Жыл бұрын
Sheer bloody mindedness, that's how.
@dadgod3615
Жыл бұрын
Alien: give up. Humanity: nah.
@CHRF-55457
Жыл бұрын
Lol someone took Commander Erwin's speech lol.
@kennethmana3103
Жыл бұрын
TENNO HEIKA BANZAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
@thearnorianruby4681
Жыл бұрын
CoD: WaW was terrifying in the Pacific Theater. Edit: had to fix a "w".
@krystenshi1932
Жыл бұрын
My soldiers rage - aot
@quarry1030
Жыл бұрын
Ah yes, anime girls are space orcs 👍
@christiannelson3978
6 ай бұрын
what you fight is malice and wrath
@klappstock943
Жыл бұрын
For the Algorithm the story and the voice
@xandrobanasig679
11 ай бұрын
13:53 this speech of survival is the best I've heard
@theicyphoenix_7745
Жыл бұрын
that thumbnail,it has to be sarah kerrigan picture raynor was holding
@OGSontar
7 ай бұрын
Although it's been said, many times many ways, FAFO, to you!
@nicholashernandez4611
Жыл бұрын
Humans must be trained to be soldiers and warriors. When pushed, every human is capable of being ruthlessly effective killers. In the military world, humans are auto turrets and these xenos made themselves into valid targets.
@ricflouvensteiner3958
Жыл бұрын
The name was Roger Roger truly a clanker through and through.
@draconus15
Жыл бұрын
This one is amazing
@kerwinbrown4180
Жыл бұрын
Excellent
@merlinathrawes746
11 ай бұрын
What the hell did they pick a fight with? You truly don't want the answer to that question!
@colegraham782
Жыл бұрын
Loved it. Love this channel. Gotta mention though. Your pronunciation of "?@π#'}×/∆" wasn't my favorite while trying to commute to work. Had to laugh the first time tho. Near jumped out of my seat.
@containerbestellungtv7984
Жыл бұрын
Really, the Attack on Titan speech. 😂
@TheRealInscrutable
7 ай бұрын
I learned a new word today: edulcorate
@alejandrosigala3502
Жыл бұрын
All glory to humanity! All hail the God Emperor of Mankind! Destroy the Xeno scum!
@maxwellwelch3717
9 күн бұрын
The only part of this i cant believe happening is humanity not leaving the biggest, baddest one behind to watch the kids.
@anvekarakash
7 ай бұрын
reference from AOT & Naruto was cool...
@bad1cj
3 ай бұрын
I understand the need to have fun with the impossible names… I’d also like for my speakers not to be blown out. I’m disappointed.
@bananabreadguy7960
Жыл бұрын
Do you guys know a channel like this one but more on fantasy.?
@zinoneus3733
Жыл бұрын
I believe sometimes he does fantasy, one was called "humans are bad familiars", however sadly i dont, if you find one though come back here and tell me. Thank you :)
@twighasarived2145
Жыл бұрын
I had to stop listening to the story. Not because it was bad when the video was bad anyway. I was just reminded a little bit too much about how hard it is to survive on a day-to-day basis with mental illnesses, and how hard it is to be strong for so long.
@queenbee8045
Жыл бұрын
Sane
@queenbee8045
Жыл бұрын
After the wars I thought I was done with death… I was a fool.
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