I would rather listen to Bill Burr's off the cuff riffing than most comics' carefully prepared material.
@akawilly
8 жыл бұрын
yup
@senseisprotege3632
8 жыл бұрын
me too
@larendaren
8 жыл бұрын
same
@brettbewley5798
8 жыл бұрын
That's why his podcast is my favorite, cause its usually just him. I actually now dislike most other podcasts that have multiple people on them. Even if its comedians I like, it always just ends up sounding like a bunch of annoying idiots talking over each other and laughing at their own jokes. Listening to one guy talk to himself for an hour is way more entertaining and gives you some insight on what they're really like.
@Wowreally42
8 жыл бұрын
lol yeah no comparison with most. He's just hilarious to the core.
@Herintruththelies
8 жыл бұрын
"Some fucking, half-a-tree individual..." I lost it.
@WalterLiddy
8 жыл бұрын
I love how the subject of a woman unbound by her wheelchair who scuba-dives with class just abruptly turns into a pro-gun rant in case of cgi dirty half-tree woman attacks. lol
@FirstLast-cf4mi
5 жыл бұрын
SPOILERS AAAH!
@user-ec2kd8sz3t
5 жыл бұрын
ikr, that's Billy Boy for ya.
@Drizzlybear1
5 жыл бұрын
Also the dirty tree woman is a ghost so the gun would be useless lol
@HannahViera
5 жыл бұрын
I read this before watching the video and it’s the best clickbait description I’ve ever read.
@pstark4
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah. Think about it.
@TheBoxingCannabyte
7 жыл бұрын
I carry a Glock 26 precisely because of my fear of tree-witches
@ElkinsEric
5 жыл бұрын
Joe Cannabyte same reason for my 1911.
@Wedge4Life
8 жыл бұрын
i laughed so hard when Bill's ADHD side-tracks him ... trying to say something nice about the Layyyyydeee and starts comparing it to a horror movie
@ashchaya7676
5 жыл бұрын
Bill may have ADD, but not ADHD. I think most people just add the H in there without even thinking about it.
@TheArtofAustenMengler
8 жыл бұрын
This LAAADDDYYYY!!!!
@trevisturner562
6 жыл бұрын
The Art of Austen Mengler love when he says tht LMAO
@SirNilzey
6 жыл бұрын
No fucking clue.
@adamkoyn792
6 жыл бұрын
One of his best "Lay-dee!"s for sure, lol
@bearifiablepau2095
5 жыл бұрын
Every time! xDDD
@kuruptkalhoon6033
8 жыл бұрын
goddamn did you have to add the mama scenes? i am alone in a 3 story house and its 2 AM
@shaolintiger88
8 жыл бұрын
7 days
@ancienttribes5310
8 жыл бұрын
Yeah, that shit was fucked. Creeped me out but also made me want to watch the movie. It actually looks kind of scary, which is rare for horror films these days.
@Tarkus2040
8 жыл бұрын
I hope you have more than a butter knife and an english muffin on hand.
@TheWayIRage
8 жыл бұрын
mind if I move in?
@SomethingSeemsOff
8 жыл бұрын
the movie was honestly pretty crappy :/ just an fyi
@mychaleg
8 жыл бұрын
Don't worry, I brought some air
@piggy201
8 жыл бұрын
"Tree lady dirty person" I'm dying...
@ihatewhatisaw
6 жыл бұрын
piggy201 half tree half human dirty individual
@vhscopyofseinfeld
5 жыл бұрын
That was the must fucking random tangent of all time 🤣🤣🤣
@medicinewest
5 жыл бұрын
@@vhscopyofseinfeld still funny as fuck tho
@ipellly
8 жыл бұрын
god damn allen you did it again great edit on this
@lucidstargirl
8 жыл бұрын
he's a fucking god with editing!
@LSDOvideos
5 жыл бұрын
5:50 "Semiotic assault rifle" Misspoken by Bill or does he have secret info on new metaphysical weaponry?
@kosmaslemo
4 жыл бұрын
he just put automatic and autistic together
@CHIEFS_DYNASTY_
7 жыл бұрын
I swear these edits make bills podcast 10000000% better
@wolffang489
6 жыл бұрын
Bringing a big metal wheel chair with you into delicate reefs is a good way to break something and get banned from a country.
@ziggyfreecloud3346
7 жыл бұрын
I'm British and I was more offended by *her* accent rather than Bill's.
@viperclive714
5 жыл бұрын
All these cunts scattering about
@senorpepper3405
2 жыл бұрын
Blimey
@MarkMarxonsBassChannel
8 жыл бұрын
This channel is the bacon of KZitem.
@letsbehonest4221
8 жыл бұрын
bacon rules..
@GARCIAJ1994
5 жыл бұрын
Not good for your body but good for your soul
@coolguy2418
5 жыл бұрын
It’s bad for you but it’s so good
@niandraladie2953
5 жыл бұрын
@Trent Michael Then why are you here, dweeb?
@SamUHells
5 жыл бұрын
Trent Michael ahhh I see what u did there, using big words to try and make it seem like your a high class snob who’s miles better than anyone who differs your opinion. Classic manipulation, bravo
@RandomDealer
8 жыл бұрын
"Two kids get lost in the woods and then they find this fuckin' creepy... woman..tree...dirty person. I don't know what the fuck it is." Fucking LOVE this guy.
@hen5799
8 жыл бұрын
butter knife + English muffin = lmao
@6ch6ris6
6 жыл бұрын
lmfao definetly getting a gun now
@jonq8714
8 жыл бұрын
1:19 Looks like one dude's girlfriend made plans for his saturday...
@steve9341
8 жыл бұрын
Sure does.
@letsbehonest4221
8 жыл бұрын
that poor bastard...lol
@chrisg7731
5 жыл бұрын
the chicks sitting around her definitely dont share her enthusiasm.
@FSquid
8 жыл бұрын
My main take away from this is that it's another example of how stupid ted talks have become. Weren't they supposed to be about innovative ideas in things like science, philosophy, economics, crime, etc? Now it's, "I went scuba diving in a wheel chair how inspiring!" This shit started when they began to have beat boxers and dudes that make their own bows on stage. Then they realized that pretentious high school show and tell gets them more views than people discussing complex ideas and here we are.
@promontorium
5 жыл бұрын
I hadn't realized it had become a joke until I heard Penn Jillette talking trash on it. Penn is so passive-hippy-romantic about most things so I knew something was up. The moment he said it, the guy he's interviewing admits hed had been asked to do a talk. He asked on what, and they said anything, they just needed to fill a slot and his name came up as someone who had given a couple speeches.
@lhaviland8602
4 жыл бұрын
@JeSSEbism 'CAUSE WE'RE JUST GONNA KILL 'EM!
@codyleslie478
3 жыл бұрын
Yea seriously! I watched a Ted talk about the history of internet memes.. and it was terrible!
@Monscent
8 жыл бұрын
Shouldn't it be alot easier and better for movement if she had lost the chair and had some kinda fins on her body instead?
@zoelynch9403
8 жыл бұрын
l know! I didn't understand that either. I guess she wanted to feel free whilst in the wheelchair?
@UrMomsChauffer
5 жыл бұрын
It’s all about her disability not impeding her lifestyle. How her disability actually gave her ability. Plus, I think she might not be able to support anything.
@bearifiablepau2095
5 жыл бұрын
It's all about bullshitting others into getting their attention. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
@JohnSmith-kz8yo
4 жыл бұрын
one person mini submarine
@lhaviland8602
4 жыл бұрын
I have a friend with spina-bifida who scuba dives. He does indeed go without a chair. No I don't have a clue why she did it this way.
@henmich
5 жыл бұрын
7:22 It made me laugh when Bill makes the comment about the shark getting a mouthful of metal and they cut to the clip of the woman shaking her head.. It seems more of a reaction to his comment than the scuba diving woman... lol
@nabetse1999
2 жыл бұрын
Lmfao superb editing
@SwaggyMcSwagSwag1
8 жыл бұрын
"All these cunts scattering about" I'm dead.
@senseisprotege3632
8 жыл бұрын
Wheelchair Shark Attack Survival Techniques and NRA-vs-a ghost! Classic Bill Burr.
@leqesai
2 жыл бұрын
3:43 This, ladies and gentlemen, is what a crowd of talkers looks like. These are not people of action. These are people who talk about action.
@alexj5298
8 жыл бұрын
LAY-DEEEEEEEEEEE
@bearifiablepau2095
5 жыл бұрын
Every. Time.
@waltefg5867
8 жыл бұрын
I got a little spooked at the mama part tbh fam
@geneharrogate6911
6 жыл бұрын
Not many lookers in the audience if I'm honest..
@steedfairley190
5 жыл бұрын
Dav Dave who cares
@beethovenalexander
6 жыл бұрын
This made me laugh so much. Especially the image of the shark covering its mouth😂😂
@Sadd2Me
7 жыл бұрын
I’m not terrified, I’m informed.
@GAZAMAN93X
7 жыл бұрын
7:56 age didn't do Velma any justice.
@ryklatortuga4146
5 жыл бұрын
Jinkies!
@ozpoz645
8 жыл бұрын
Yeah, when a big dirty tree woman comes through my window is when I'll want a gun haha! Bill just changed my mind about gun control haha
@mutagenooze
8 жыл бұрын
LAAAAAAAAAADDDEEEEEE
@michaelwatkins9479
2 жыл бұрын
“But don’t worry, I brought some air!” Lmfaooo
@DillaDawg88
2 жыл бұрын
🤣
@NikolajKipsen
8 жыл бұрын
''All these cunts scattering about'' -Bill Burr 2016 Omg that shit was too funny!!
@boennekisnmakka7855
5 жыл бұрын
"Don't worry! I brought some air." I love Bill Burr
@raychambers3646
5 жыл бұрын
Bill I'm so glad you picked up some English dialogue on your visit to the UK,well done chap.
@rocknrolla53
8 жыл бұрын
Editing on the level of Bill's ability to go off topic! You're the best
@ThoughtinFlight
5 жыл бұрын
I did not have to see that tree mom shit. I am now broken. I would call mommy but that just makes it worse
@jml19221
6 жыл бұрын
The rest of the world worried about paying bills, making ends meet. Missing out on their true potential.
@abplusfive
5 жыл бұрын
More like a mermaid than a tree.
@gaurav007soni
5 жыл бұрын
you are a comic god Bill. Your talent is unmatched. your comic timings, your way of making a motivational - sad story into something funny... it's a gift i haven't seen in anyone else. 😂😂😂😂 take my money bill.
@fjnemo
5 жыл бұрын
Why is she wearing A DRESS in the ocean???
@mitchellcarlson1371
5 жыл бұрын
Bill Burr is a national treasure
@antoyal
8 жыл бұрын
Came for the story of empowerment, stayed for the reasoned defense of the 2nd Amendment.
@senseisprotege3632
8 жыл бұрын
"Had the balls...the ovaries if you will, to scuba dive! lmao
@_fameONE
8 жыл бұрын
"Don't worry, I brought some air."
@Ryan-ug9jm
8 жыл бұрын
thanks for uploading all these bill burr podcast bits dude your edits are awesome, makes his commentary even better
@generaljellyroll8737
4 жыл бұрын
Haha wtf. He uses a fictional monster to justify semi automatic weapons
@xixGoBL1Nxix
8 жыл бұрын
your videos are great!! you should try to reach out to Bill and see if you could officially do this for him, your editing compliments what he talks about so perfectly. It really adds to the humor of what he is talking about.
@1ColdFuture
8 жыл бұрын
holy shit, that movie looks scary and I never say that about NEW movies.
@christmas6666
4 жыл бұрын
Don't blow it. Count your money. Bring some air.
@jaysnow4074
7 жыл бұрын
A few things: 1) 8:05 Why is she wearing a summer dress while diving in the ocean? 2) 1:20 The blonde in the top right corner is cute 3) 0:41 the dude in the bottom right corner looks a little too interested
@phamtastic0
7 жыл бұрын
"don't worry, i brought some air" Gold
@cromlech6167
8 жыл бұрын
Do you think when Bill yells "LADIES" all muffled, he is yelling it at his wife because she is offended by him calling them bitches?
@cromlech6167
8 жыл бұрын
***** You're right, and it's kind of funny that she's so into him, when he is so blatantly anti-PC
@elchucofried5683
7 жыл бұрын
Cromlech616 no I think he does it to piss off the feminist
@dominiqswilliams3847
7 жыл бұрын
It's a Jerry Lewis reference.
@SamBassComedy
8 жыл бұрын
Oh jeezus that movie looks insane.
@anthonymiller934
8 жыл бұрын
Eehhh.. It's okay
@chaosinorderrr
8 жыл бұрын
The short film its based on is scary af tho
@tpstrat14
8 жыл бұрын
the timing at 7:34 ... thought she was reacting to Bill. "no no no sir, that's not funny at all. Very offensive. You should be fined and ordered by the Supreme Court to make an apology video to both shark attack victims and the handicapped".
@garrettpayne5799
5 жыл бұрын
I love Bill's use of like 60's colloquialisms like "broad" or "egghead". I love it, it's awesome.
@eraldylli
8 жыл бұрын
"Don't worry, I'll bring some air." Hilarious.
@JoeLackey
5 жыл бұрын
Anti-gun folks would call the police, who would come with.....wait for it......wait for it.....guns.
@michaelkelly3365
5 жыл бұрын
Bill comparing a disabled woman to a horror movie character, classic.
@Deedo_67
5 жыл бұрын
What I don’t get is why the heck she’s wearing a dress to go scuba diving.
@SwissMarksman
4 жыл бұрын
a e s t h e t i c s
@mobus1603
8 жыл бұрын
What the hell is she proving by going scuba diving in a wheelchair wearing a dress? Wouldn't it be easier to just go scuba diving as a paraplegic without the chair? Wouldn't that still be a fun accomplishment? Only a chick would come up with some dumb idea like that. It's a stupid, illogical chick idea where she gets a lot of attention by doing it and it makes everyone feel all goody goody inside. Yeah, I get it, it's supposed to be a beautiful form of self expression, and it gives her a chance to tackle the odds once more, but that chair had to be enhanced to the point that it pretty much did all the work, and she just waved her hands around a bit to steer.
@gorilla82
6 жыл бұрын
She should do skydiving next and after that bungee jumping.
@Paulo_Dirac
7 жыл бұрын
I have no better definition of stupidity....scubadiving in a whellchair...that's the finest thing you could find...
@aaronveikley1454
8 жыл бұрын
"This lady had the balls....the fucking ovaries if you will, to scuba dive." LOL Using the movie Mama as pro gun propaganda is fucking classic.
@OMGKITTENMEWMEW1
5 жыл бұрын
This whole time I'm wondering why she doesn't just go scuba diving normally.. which I'm sure she probably covered in her talk.
@Akenne899
8 жыл бұрын
Yeah man this is great work Allenpalin
@allenpalin
8 жыл бұрын
Thanks, Adam!
@simonpeter5032
4 жыл бұрын
If a tree woman comes into my house, I’m using a chainsaw. Ps: *”Semi-autic assault rifle?”* Is that like Joe Biden’s AR14s?
@NewYorkBattleCat
8 жыл бұрын
this is fucking gold FFS plz make more!
@desertsand4797
5 жыл бұрын
Sorry to comment 5 years too late, but I'm a low level freshwater scuba diver who would love nothing more than to dive with this woman anywhere in the world. I am a single plegic who hides my limitations from other divers, this woman has no choice but to lay it all out and still has the ovaries to fearlessly enter another dimension, to say I am in awe is an understatement. Thank you Bill Burr for uncovering this woman, fan of your stand-up but double fan of your podcast unscripted rants. A true badass that says what he thinks,, so motherfuking rare in this world today because nobody has the balls, just like this woman who has the ovaries to kick everyone's ass who is scared of this planet and what it has to offer, maybe someday I can go dog sledding above the arctic circle in the worst blizzard for the last hundred fucken years with a woman this amazing. Only the creator of the universe can decide.
@ralpharreola3413
8 жыл бұрын
Goddammit... Freckles nails it... Im also terrified by the ocean... so much that I as a California native up and left to the mountain time zone. Im not scared of the ocean... but i am informed of it. Marine... you did it again.
@goondocksaints9597
5 жыл бұрын
Funny how some of those underwater scenes show the woman and the wheelchair bearing straight at the coral and then they switch to other footage. Trust me, if you've ever done any scuba diving along a coral reef you'll know that the local, state and federal government doesn't have a sense of humor when it comes to touching the coral. But here we see this woman heading straight for the coral and no sign of any control of her direction, I actually found myself imagining the sound it made when she hit the coral with her chair. Relax, I'm not campaigning against anyone at all scuba diving, I'm just saying that slamming into the coral didn't have to be part of the 'adventure' - the coral didn't have to be involved at all.
@korosuke1788
Жыл бұрын
Sounds like a cool concept but with a little more effort you might just go ahead and create a small submarine.
@b.f.skinner4383
Жыл бұрын
Billy’s impression of an English accent fucking kills me 😂
@thebandcoca
2 жыл бұрын
Good for her but she seems very pleased with herself.
@JamaaLS
8 жыл бұрын
this is the best channel ever
@aworthlessgoat
8 жыл бұрын
Why exactly did she need the wheelchair? Seems like she could have just gone scuba diving without it. It would have a been a lot easier to move around..
@TheBoards1991
8 жыл бұрын
"You're sitting there with a bread knife and an english muffin, and this fuckin' thing comes through the goddamn window."
@justme-hh4vp
3 жыл бұрын
I wouldn't say I'm terrified of the ocean, i'm informed about the ocean
@fallout3freak360
6 жыл бұрын
"I would love to hear what you have to say when some half a tree, half a woman dirty fuckin' individual comes into your house from the woods" - Bill Burr
@channel.3.
3 жыл бұрын
So glad Sue left her sunglasses on her head for her presentation. Not like she had plenty of time to prepare... she just came in from the parking lot at 2pm with not enough time to put her glasses away
@UhtredOfBamburgh
5 жыл бұрын
why is every person in that TedTalk basically the exact same woman except for the one hot chick who's taller?
@amitchell2009
8 жыл бұрын
Lol "I shouldn't say I'm terrified; I'm informed of the ocean"
@YungJ
3 жыл бұрын
This fuhhckin LAAAAYDEEEEE
@thelasticonoclast9467
4 жыл бұрын
She was cuba diving. You won’t catch me out there in the middle of that damn ocean cuba diving! Oh hell naw!
@chrissy9153
Жыл бұрын
I didn’t know where that meme came from and also god blessed us with Bill Burr
@JakeyFlake
6 жыл бұрын
But why would she need the chair at all when shes diving, surely its a liability.
@beautifulloser75
6 жыл бұрын
Flakey Jake she doesn't need it diving. She's using as just a "look at me" thing. Wheelchair bound people swim regularly even if she can't move their legs.
@KrisKomar
5 жыл бұрын
No the weird part is that she's in a dress like she just wheeled in the ocean off the sand. You know there's a team of people supporting this so that nothing goes wrong, so why isn't she also taking it seriously and wearing a wet suit or something?
@mikejarrett3297
8 жыл бұрын
As a disabled person i hate that look people give you like they are so inspired by the fact you can even get out the house, i'm not saying mrs austin isn't cos she is but i could be a complete piece of shit and they hear ohhh you lost parts of your spine to cancer and that look comes.
@praiseit6848
5 жыл бұрын
is there something more useless than "TEDx Woman" ???
@CaptainAwesomeVlog
6 жыл бұрын
Why take the chair underwater? She can scuba without it, and actually be more mobile.
@jffry24
5 жыл бұрын
Lmaoooooo A bread knife and an English muffin that was some funny shit
@TheNewRobin30
8 жыл бұрын
You're a god among men. Godspeed
@MagikFingers420
4 жыл бұрын
Cant find many female comments, just sayin....
@CarpeNoctem0100
5 жыл бұрын
"So anyways this lady is in a fucking wheelchair in the ocean" as if he didn't go on a 3 minute nra tree lady rant
@CS-rd6rn
5 жыл бұрын
Only 1 in 500 million or so people can go diving with their wheelchair.I feel envy, not admiration.
@metalmugen
7 жыл бұрын
Jessica Chastain is unbelievably hot in MAMA , like, fucking incredible.
@mindfuless674
5 жыл бұрын
That wheelchair underwater is funny shit
@shj.8798
8 жыл бұрын
wow...this man just made me believe swimming is the dumbest shit ever. "yeah don't worry i brought some air." like .. im so glad i discovered this channel.
@l3ertuz362
5 жыл бұрын
now I know why KZitem is now recommending me horror clips
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