My husband is NT, and he gets me. We've been married for almost 30 years. I recently discovered my autism and, he discovered he feel in love for my autistic traits. He is very supportive and is helping me creat a safe accommodated environment.
@Simplyinfamous-yc4pi
3 ай бұрын
I was going about my morning routine. Then I stumbled upon this. I was always curious about who her husband was.
@Azzi0921
3 ай бұрын
47:45 Couldn't help noticing you rocking whilst you are talking & your husband is talking.🤭😊 I subconsciously do some form of rocking/fidgeting myself until I realise that I'm doing it.🤣😂
@katzenbekloppt_mf
3 ай бұрын
I am always happy when I see as I often do this myself. But watching this I just used my new arrived (not a week ago) STIMAGZ. Love them! First time in my life I ordered something directly from an US-company, but it was definitly worth it. Just a bit too loud outside maybe, but I knew before. So nice to finally know about why and that it comforts me and care for those needs and allow myself😊
@Azzi0921
3 ай бұрын
38:17 You hit the nail right on the head about relationships of male being neurodiverse and female being neutotypical. My last relationship ended on Feb 2020, and ex-wife in 2010 as an undiagnosed autistic adult male. Reflecting on these relationships after my diagnosis in June 2023 made sense of everything that neither of us was aware of.
@Pete_1972
3 ай бұрын
Jenn, the co-dependency made sense to me. I “chose” my partner because I felt he could take care of me. Emotionally that is. He took care of his adult siblings and parents. He got meaning out if this and maybe he saw I needed some help to get through life. It was a win-win for us I guess. 25 years later we are still together.
@duikmans
3 ай бұрын
Damn! Missed the live! Ours was also a NT-ND marriage. We got divorced after 25 years. Don't know how much me being ND played a role in it, guess I'll never know. On a side note: an omni-directional mic, as used in meeting rooms for web conferences, works wonders.
@Simplyinfamous-yc4pi
3 ай бұрын
Aww. They are too cute. I felt what she said as a single mom. When I had my first baby outside of marriage I thought I f ** ked up. I came from a high achieving family. Then 6 years later after my first I found a codependent. We co-parent well but the relationship was not good. We are really good friends. Now I feel I fucked up again because I have have two kids two dads. So much pressure on a woman. I do feel like I need to date someone older than me. I mean older. Haven't found it yet. They are generally already married 😂
@AuditingWithAutism
3 ай бұрын
Super good live! Your stories sound similar to mine and my partner from before: I met her when she was 19, barely pregnant, and I was 22. When the baby was born, I was there and have been ever since. (PS-I like your dad's sense of humor, Jenn. My dad told me a joke once, kinda like the Enya joke, and I laughed harder than I can remember) Happy Papa Day!
@annanicholson7923
3 ай бұрын
I found this so interesting, my husband has just recently been diagnosed with autism and during the process I started wondering if I might be autistic as well, l was diagnosed dyslexic decades ago so already neurodiverse. I find it interesting that my husband doesn’t give me processing time either, maybe because it was denied to him, he is learning to give me time. Only recently I heard about neurotypical and neurodiverse so I wasn’t aware l was just knew l was different. Maybe the fact that we are neurodiverse helps us understand each other better. We are both older than you so have lived many decades having no idea that we were autistic, also came from broken relationships maybe both our ex’s were narcissistic, so can relate to a lot of things you mentioned in this video
@mikaeljacobsson1437
3 ай бұрын
As a male with Autism and ADHD, relationships never made sense, based on personal experiences. I have no doubts now that those females i have been with were neurotypicals. They all felt way to emotional, clingy and demanding. It always felt like you had to give up who you were to be in a relationship. That nothing matter beyond the relationship itself, which to me is really stupid. I need to be me and to be with my interests and passions. I have always put that before anything else. I got diagnosed late in life. I was 40 but this priority thing has been there all my life. I have tried to be in a relationship but always ended up being bored/annoyed. To much trouble and work just for the "physical part". Maybe things would have been different if i had been with a neurodiverse female? I cant really remember ever meeting a neurodiverse female, whether its been in education or in work. Noone obvious but that i think has more to do with masking than there not being some atleast. It seems way harder for females to get the questions and answers they need to understand themselves. Maybe more common too that females mask? I have never masked in life. I have stopped interacting with people when they act strange around me.
@katzenbekloppt_mf
3 ай бұрын
Hm, I am an ND-woman that is very bad in relationships for equal reasons, don't want to live together, need a lot of alone time, don't want to compromise too much on certain things and prefer staying alone then beeing in a relationship that ferls not much more right then wrong. But I think I am not a standard and neither good nor bad, just me. And there are people with different needs and that's great, just doesn't fit with a person like me or maybe You. I don't want to be unhappy by supressing my needs, but also I don't want another person to do so.
@katzenbekloppt_mf
3 ай бұрын
Aww🥰 You two are a really sweet couple, Jenn! I was most of my life single and actually happily am for some years after I ended the last longest relationship. I need a lot of alone-time and after beeing unplanned single-mum für so long my stress-levels went even a lot lower, my will to compromise is also very low. And age gaps are very unimportant to me. I used to be the much younger one in earlier relationships (10, 15, 20 years) and later in that longest I was 14 years older. My dad was nearly 15 years older then my mother (and much cooler!). Oh, and I would like to be introduced to Your chicken one day😂🐔🐓🐣
@jaosandv
3 ай бұрын
I liked to listen to you both! More of this please. 🤩😎
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
Thank you for watching hopefully we'll get to do another one in the future
@Azzi0921
3 ай бұрын
23:34 You're not the problem, and it isn't a problem. Society is the problem.😢
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
Thank you
@InterDivergent
3 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing guys, great video.
@InterDivergent
3 ай бұрын
30:40 I had the exact same probs in my relationship, which ended in a messy divorce for me since unfortunately I only discovered my Autism 10+ years later. I recently apologised to both my Son and my X-Wife. Everything fell into place and made so much sense which was devastating for me to discover after the fact. Glad to hear that you guys have sorted it out during.
@Allthepills
3 ай бұрын
Bugger... I missed it
@solgirl9
3 ай бұрын
So many common scenarios with my husband and I too. 💕
@isabellammusic
3 ай бұрын
This was very interesting!
@joyduve-browning
3 ай бұрын
Wait..... So, I do have a 22 year old son who's also autistic and I'm autistic...... I've always thought something was off with my mom who's turning 60 does this mean she could be too? Because my dad's definitely not.
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
It's possible. The etiology of autism isn't solely genetic, but studies conclude a very large part of it is
@erikavaleries
3 ай бұрын
I’ve been the ND woman
@lauraburystedmundsyoga8231
3 ай бұрын
💚
@OldTimer1970
3 ай бұрын
Chickens
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
I mean.... I'll think about it....
@OldTimer1970
3 ай бұрын
@@NeurodiverJENNt you've had three minutes and...I prefer soft boiled btw.
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
@@OldTimer1970 I need 24 hour notice please
@OldTimer1970
3 ай бұрын
@@NeurodiverJENNt it's been weeks Jenn , weeks, it's the adhd, but I think you'll find ref in first member's video. lol we are getting chickens and you're the only chicken expert I will trust.
@joyduve-browning
3 ай бұрын
I'm autistic and my husband is not
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
Twinning!
@chrislyons5556
3 ай бұрын
Sup
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
Yo
@Azzi0921
3 ай бұрын
Just woke up in the UK on Sunday after finishing work at 11pm.🥱🥱
@jaosandv
3 ай бұрын
I was brought up beeing told that I had to look people in the eye, so I had to learn to do it. Im not god at it, but i try
@BuckeBoo
2 ай бұрын
I wish I caught this live. Wife and I are a NT/ND couple.
@heatherwilliams3748
3 ай бұрын
I also need a lot of alone time and struggle to find a way to tell my partner so. He's sensitive to the feeling of rejection so he takes things to heart and sometimes personally. It's tough. Also, because I so enjoy my alone time, when he's at work I miss him but not in the same way he misses me; he wants to come home and be near me and I'm enjoying not having to interact with anyone.
@vynedvyne59
Ай бұрын
❤
@nav_man9167
3 ай бұрын
The dynamic and stories you guys are telling sounds eerily like my relationship but in reverse (I'm a male, partner is a female). I always also used to get into a lot of trouble playing devil's advocate. She had a rough childhood and has codependent tendancies. Jenn, I remember you saying you are an INTP (per Myers Briggs). I'm an INTP also. My partner is an ISFJ. Two completely opposing personalities which explains a lot of the conflict we've had. I wonder what MBTI your husband is?
@NeurodiverJENNt
3 ай бұрын
You remember correctly fellow INTP. I just looked up ISFJ personality type. I think my husband was ENFP last time he took the test... The campaigner but in my head that doesn't fit him. Maybe I should ask him to take it again.
@nav_man9167
3 ай бұрын
I am such an INTP, I love trying to catergorise people into an MBTI type lol. Will be interesting to see if your husband is actually an ENFP. I feel like that personality would complement nicely in that even though he would be more emotional (and dare I say irrational), you two would be able to be all abstract and spontaneous together. Would be fun.
Пікірлер: 45