When the sister says "who has a comfortable life after marriage" makes me feel so sad. Is she trapped in a bad union just for the sake of being married?
@Tippy2forU
4 жыл бұрын
I think so. That seems to be the norm. They don't seem to get married for love but convenience.
@jamixupjamdung447
4 жыл бұрын
Never knew other cultures were like this towards marriage etc.... Smh 💯
@Caramelpop86
4 жыл бұрын
Her sister is poor and trapped in a poor town. But she's married with kids. Which is sad because she think she's better than her single, lawyer sister.
@nightlongg4758
4 жыл бұрын
Ashley Reed I know lots of aunties like that. They think that they are better the you and will look down on you just because they are married and you’re not. Like you’re in a miserable/toxic marriage.
@kimroberts2704
4 жыл бұрын
You do realize that if a lot of marriages were arranged in the past. Sometimes it was a simple as two single people working in the same place. Times have really changed. Besides, look at the western divorce rate. Do we westerners really excel at picking mates and making it work?
@candycane520
4 жыл бұрын
Just want to let everyone know, Qiu Humei is now married to a German guy and lives in Munich. She’s currently trying to open a business.
@XxKikyouxX
4 жыл бұрын
Extremely happy for her, Best wishes in her family
@mj-yo7vt
4 жыл бұрын
So happy to hear it!
@JohnDoe-ht5vq
4 жыл бұрын
@@maellecatherinet373 No she doesnt because shes full of BS
@franceslock1662
4 жыл бұрын
candycane520 I hope he is good to her long-term and I wish her success in her business.
@tinawalker6770
4 жыл бұрын
Thanks for sharing that information cuz I was very concerned about her mental state. To have another female put you down like what that lady did to her was just very painful to watched. All I could say to myself was just marry a foreigner, get out. One her own parents are not on half of the level of education she is on, they will never understand how she feels. The only concern they have is for her to get marry and have a child. It doesn't matter if she is happy or being treated bad, because to them being marry and having a child is happiness. Thanks for sharing the story that she left the country and now married to a German guy. I was at ease and imagine how many women are going through the same thing. The men are more than the women yet still the men can not find suitable partners because they are looking for slaves not wives. If that is the case then there is no need for the females children to be educated since all they need a man and having a child. I'm glad and very proud of her that she stood her ground and not only that but left that looser who told her that she was not pretty and old. China has a very serious problem on line and I can see the future that most Chinese women will marry to foreigners whether they like it or not.
@krownzilla
4 жыл бұрын
"Who has a comfortable life after marriage?" Seems her sister is projecting her own miseries on Huamei. How dare she have a career and be a free woman while her sisters are stuck in their humdrum lives? She must be miserable like her sisters. A lot of people seem to think life must follow one pattern: school, work, marriage, kids. It's not a one size fits all. Anyone who dares to defy this pattern is immediately labeled as abnormal or selfish.
@Iexapro
4 жыл бұрын
krownzilla the way her sister was talking to her really hurt...could feel her pain.
@melteddarkchocolate000
4 жыл бұрын
It’s basically school work vacation adventure party marriage kids and a happy family life. Life can be this way you just gotta make it fun
@runninginsept
4 жыл бұрын
Snow Cream Not if you've had the misfortune of marrying a monster. They exist in human skin and you wouldn't know it till it's too late. China (and Asia in general) is additionally complex for its multitudes of culture, beliefs, traditions.
@hannaittihadiyah5264
4 жыл бұрын
Sadly, they often forgot the last part: dies.
@ericp1139
4 жыл бұрын
It’s social hazing. “I suffered through it, so you must too!”
@lara_xy
3 жыл бұрын
I feel so sorry for her when she visits her family and all they do is yell and put her down. The father is the worst, he says education made her stupid?? NO, she became wiser and realized she does not need a loveless marriage just to please her family.
@sammann3577
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/jo-iyailsYuDgqA in this video she gets married she has over came misogyny and her own expectation
@user-fz8su1dg1w
2 жыл бұрын
I've just seen the full documentary, it's a pity they don't show the rest here. She decides to get another university degree in France. Before leaving, she goes to see her family again and her father is so sweet and supportive, even her awful sister is really nice to her. Her father said some really touching things that actually made me understand him a lot better. He also said to her that she brings him honour. At the end of the documentary it said that after graduating in France, she got a job offer in Germany, where she now lives with her husband.
@eberemartins851
2 жыл бұрын
Hello 👋 that’s so true
@alphabeta3105
2 жыл бұрын
@@user-fz8su1dg1w she got married after all, ok. Let's see how many Western women will be alone after 35 since their men are being taken by feminine women from patriarchal countries. Why talk that way? Coz matchmaking agencies in the West are extremely hungry for men after 35 alongside the excessive number of single spinsters eager to get married. Yeah, super
@libertydrive4388
Жыл бұрын
They're trying to talk some sense into her, but the modern feminist brainwashing won't allow her to hear it. He's right, some of the biggest fools in the world have the most formal education.
@CowboySlut
4 жыл бұрын
"i have high standard" - a girl who literally just wants a decent guy with an education
@solointheburbs
4 жыл бұрын
Sad that basic standards are considered too high.
@Aetila
4 жыл бұрын
"I have high standards...the guy shouldn't spit on the street and he shouldn't hit me, that's it." :-)
@afreedahossain686
4 жыл бұрын
Benny C. she’s the ten here
@john-go9xy
4 жыл бұрын
@@afreedahossain686 in Fantasyland yes.
@consciouscrypto3090
4 жыл бұрын
@@john-go9xy More like she wants a 6 and she's an 8.
@Nicole-uc9ep
3 жыл бұрын
The interviewer is not being too straight forward. She's actually rude.
@virginiamoss7045
3 жыл бұрын
Way rude!
@daifukurinn
3 жыл бұрын
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that's normal with some Asian cultures. My parents are Chinese from Vietnam and the way I hear them talk amongst their friends, it's pretty rude. Like their friends will say, "You guys are ugly, how do you have pretty children?" or "You got fat" when they haven't seen each other in awhile.
@Chlo-ee
3 жыл бұрын
@@daifukurinn it’s still rude even if it is the norm.
@daifukurinn
3 жыл бұрын
@@Chlo-ee oh, it definitely is. Never denied that part. Lol.
@novakattila
3 жыл бұрын
This is normal in Chinese culture, and its not considered rude.
@annamackin9322
4 жыл бұрын
I'm fluent in mandarin and the women interviewing her in the beginning was so rude. She literally said that the women wasn't beautiful and was too old like wtf?? That women had a impressive career being a lawyer and she can enjoy life without being married.
@guguguro
4 жыл бұрын
@@kazual9206 aight imma head out
@jiayewang2777
4 жыл бұрын
@@kazual9206 Dude, if you're serious, I feel sorry for your family
@sceaserjulius9476
4 жыл бұрын
@@kazual9206 as a man, i approve.
@MP708
4 жыл бұрын
Right?! So rude! She is beautiful!
@zheng1437
4 жыл бұрын
She was only 32 at that time of interview.
@alieninthecaribbean
3 жыл бұрын
The good news is she moved to Germany and is in a happy relationship with a German doctor. Many women in countries where they have become more educated and have higher standards than the culture has raised men to have, may need to look outside their country as well to find the kind of partnership that is compatible with their level of intelligence, life-goals, and lifestyle. Many women (not just in China but in many parts of the world, including here in the Caribbean) DO NOT want their mother's, aunties', grandmother's and great auntie's type of marriage. They see how miserable their female relatives were. How can anyone expect them to look forward to that kind of life and select the kind of men with the same kind of mentality and expectations that made their female relatives miserable?
@bschuber
2 жыл бұрын
Is this really true? How do you know this? (And I don't know why I'm so interested, I really sincerely hope she finds a happy life, away from that societal pressure!)
@eddieraines8365
2 жыл бұрын
My thoughts exactly Bryce i would love to see the update on her status.
@marvin2678
Жыл бұрын
@@bschuber souds fake asf
@teatime3403
Жыл бұрын
@@marvin2678 If you search up her name you can see she moved to Germany and I remember seeing a photo with her partner a while back but I don't remember where I found it.
@mrt445
Жыл бұрын
I said this would be the outcome. If these women leave in preference for western men who are willing to marry them it will make it much harder for Asian men to find wives.
@theuglykwan
3 жыл бұрын
"For them, a girl with a degree equals a boy" They actually mistranslated this. What she said was "almost equal". That's important because they might have been better than many but the equality was still disparate and grudging.
@colearningrs
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah, the relevant phrase is "差不多" which connotes an inequality one is willing to overlook, rather than an equality. Thanks for pointing that out!
@songwithoutword
3 жыл бұрын
@theuglykwan Was that the only thing that was mistranslated? I really feel like as an English speaker I missed a lot of the details towards the end when she was with her family. Was the rest pretty well done?
@futo
3 жыл бұрын
Oh it isn't just the men who are imposing this, some mothers are like this, if you have a degree you'll never find a nice man, lol
@d11j09l92
4 жыл бұрын
This whole video is literally a beautiful, confident woman living her life alongside judgemental people who are jealous of her success. Get. Out. Of. There. I feel so sad for her. 😥
@wordzmyth
4 жыл бұрын
She did get out to Germany, around 2018 😄
@d11j09l92
4 жыл бұрын
@@wordzmyth Thank goodness.
@user-pp9df6ml6i
3 жыл бұрын
“You listened to me when you were a kid at school. Now you don’t.” That’s because she was a child. She’s an adult now. She’s capable of making her own choices in life. It’s not about you and what you want
@alterego157
3 жыл бұрын
I agree. But freedom comes with responsibility, and you have to live with consequences of your choices.
@cherie4665
3 жыл бұрын
Ikr. Asian parents are like that. It's impossible to reason with them because to them, you're always a child
@libertydrive4388
3 жыл бұрын
Her family makes valid points. She thinks she can find a guy later when it suits her. She’s almost too old now. Moving to another country will not fix that.
@carolinecherry2423
3 жыл бұрын
In Chinese culture, children are not supposed to have thoughts and opinions that differ from their families.
@LunakieCherrie
3 жыл бұрын
I wish her dad was as caring as mines, my dad nothing for me yet I wanna get married and settle down, I’m 19. This woman will realize she needs a man, you can’t stop biology lady.
@kata7628
3 жыл бұрын
She’s so lovely and strong and intelligent; she’s 20 years into the future compared to everyone around her. I hope she finds happiness and fulfillment, whether single or married. The people who are debating her looks aren’t seeing her stylish confidence, her humor and grace, the way her emotions and intelligence shines through her eyes.
@sharonhunt5256
4 жыл бұрын
She looks alot better than the interviewer.
@eboigbecharles6905
3 жыл бұрын
Hello how are you Am Erikmikael by name. Can I have your Email?
@JovhonteFirstOfHisName
3 жыл бұрын
What does that have to do with ur and how shes wasted her glory years
@abm5707
3 жыл бұрын
I saw it but I did not want to say 🤐
@alexandragriseltellovalenz1029
3 жыл бұрын
yes!
@FB-gt5eu
3 жыл бұрын
My hairdresser is bald, he's still a good hairdresser. Understand, the woman is doing HER JOB, and yes, she's OLD for the kind of man she wants, they can get younger, why would they choose her? Her carrer? no one cares.
@VanLe-ik1bo
4 жыл бұрын
I can relate to this on so many levels. I’m a Vietnamese 27 years old girl who has a bachelor in Business and an MBA with a thriving career in Adtech industry. I am considerably good looking, confident and secure. Yet, whenever I come home, my mom would say things like “you think you’re young and pretty but you’re not. You are getting uglier and arrogant. I couldn’t believe that you’re disappointing me by not having a bf at this point”. And she meant it. She guilt tripped me at every event possible, 4 times a day. I don’t care whatever anyone says about me, but hearing my mom said that I am the reason why she is sad makes me feel so uncomfortable. I don’t want to make her cry (yes, she cried because Im single by choice). But I also don’t want to date someone for the sake of somebody else’s projection of happiness rather than my own.
@indreamluo1981
4 жыл бұрын
As Asian we all understand that it’s the generation gap between elderlies’ traditions and youngsters’ modern attitudes. Hope there’s a understanding in between.
@dreamlover4128
4 жыл бұрын
You're 27 and secure. Why not move out instead if having to put up with her insults?
@Nylon_riot
4 жыл бұрын
"You are getting uglier and arrogant." I would respond: What I am is taking my money and all my free time and going on a fabulous vacation to see the world from first class why you sit around miserable with a man you can't stand.
@makeitcount2985
4 жыл бұрын
Your mom sounds toxic
@opajee
4 жыл бұрын
I'm 35 and totally understand what you're going through. I never regret waiting and not jumping into any relationship just to satisfy what others think I should be doing. Sounds like you have an awesome career and I just KNOW when you meet the right person everything, all the waiting ect. Will be worth it.
@Irie2286
4 жыл бұрын
Girl, run. That emotional blackmail, even if your family is "well meaning" is completely wrong. They supported you to get a career to be able to take care of yourself which is what you're doing. What were they expecting??? Seriously? You can be alone and happy. Singleness does not equal loneliness. Oh my gosh, I'm so angry with her family
@RaymondHng
3 жыл бұрын
You can rest. She's left the country and her family behind. She's gone to places where her family has never dreamed of going and doing things that they have never imagined of doing. twitter.com/HuameiQ/status/1228442159399022600 www.pbs.org/independentlens/blog/filmmakers-follow-women-in-china-trying-to-overcome-stigma-of-being-single/
@somethingsomething8405
3 жыл бұрын
god you people, life ain't that easy in Asia (or some other continents for all I know), you all are very closed up in your boxes if you didn't know such things are happening constantly everywhere else
@whatsilviadid3993
3 жыл бұрын
As a single woman in my late thirties, this video is hard to swallow. In the end, no matter how beautiful she really is, how smart and how hard she has worked for herself to even improve her old generation status, as a woman she is only valued for her uterus. Women deserve sooo much more than a society like this. God, The Universe or whatever you believe in, didn't create women to be slaves of men or to even be completed by a man. We are humans with our own rights and our own skills and that is not even a doubt in truly developed societies. Far too many people are unhappily married in this world with unhappy children for the sake of having them. I'm glad she found a partner and she is away from that toxic situation.
@House2017
3 жыл бұрын
This. All of this! :)
@alphabeta3105
2 жыл бұрын
Unhappy marriage almost always because of the poor choice made back in the day
@basculhonn
2 жыл бұрын
Sloppy seconds
@strnglhld
2 жыл бұрын
@@basculhonn Look at how you are dressed, are you wearing overalls??
@ellie-tk4jy
Жыл бұрын
@Gonçalo António clearly your mother had sloppy seconds because she settled for a disgusting man repulsive enough to create a child like you. She must have vomited everytime she fkd your stupid dad.
@BringMeThe0cean.
4 жыл бұрын
I could literally feel my heart sink with hers as that guy told her that he doesn’t want a wife stronger than him...who can make their own decisions on their own....
@rebekahmarie7665
4 жыл бұрын
If this was said in the UK, his face would meet the floor
@treelo11
4 жыл бұрын
He's so stupid like OK if you want to show off how strong you are then go do the housework.
@elviraflorence9268
4 жыл бұрын
gigi ! He is that type that I could flatly refuse him and leave him at instant
@letslearn3513
4 жыл бұрын
@@rebekahmarie7665 Is it against law for somebody to say that he doesn't want a particular person to be his wife?
@CozyGameCat
4 жыл бұрын
@lets learn Have you ever heard a woman say “I don’t want a man to make any decisions in our relationship. You tell me what you need and I’ll decide if you actually need it.”? Can you imagine the response? That’s what the response should be no matter who is in a relationship with who.
@Regina777.
4 жыл бұрын
"I don't want my wife to be stronger than me" Honestly wdf.. A marriage is a unit. Working TOGETHER. Not just one person having all the power...
@j_mokusei
4 жыл бұрын
words of truth
@jerryrichardson2799
4 жыл бұрын
Yeah, marriage should be a partnership.
@masync183
4 жыл бұрын
anyone who thinks of relationships like that isnt just a red flag, its a big bright blinking sign saying "do not marry me". whats also pretty sad is that its not even really his fault, thats just what happens when blatant misogyny goes unchecked and unquestioned, you end up with spineless dudes who literally fear their partner being an equal to them because they have been brought up to see women as lesser and to be equal to one would be to bring himself down to a lower level of humanity. i can see why he would want to be dominant, his (and so many other mens) masculinity is derived from feeling superior. that being said, it does seem like a new and much better form of masculinity is slowly becoming more normalized, the kind where men arent defined by what other tell them to be and instead decide to be their own person. imho, there are few things less powerful, less intimidating and less worthy of time than a person who defines themselves by what theyve been told they "should be".
@truffaut650truffaut6
4 жыл бұрын
He just wanted to decide what kind of tv they would have...that's not too bad😂😂😂
@RsZ789
4 жыл бұрын
XI I agree with you a marriage is a unit working together, but that doesn't meant they have to do the same job. Men and women look for different things in each other. Women tend to want men who are masculine, confident, financially stable and protectors and leaders for the family. Men tend to want young beautiful feminine women who can have children and manage a family. They each bring something to the table. That's how it been since the beginning of time and it's gotten us this far. Today's women want it all, a masculine successful man who wants an independent women who won't follow get husband. It doesn't work that way
@valsett3385
3 жыл бұрын
Asking for a man to respect women is not “high standard” it should be normal
@noelsmaison685
3 жыл бұрын
Exactly. But people have disrespected women so much that asking for respect is considered something huge
@lovelycute3298
3 жыл бұрын
I was thinking the same thing like isn't that supposed to be normal ? Educated and respectful
@aren1998
3 жыл бұрын
Her standard is not high tho imo
@julielee8697
3 жыл бұрын
well, that's our lives. and this lawyer lady's hometown is Shandong which is very traditional.
@JM-nt5ex
3 жыл бұрын
Not in most of Asia, Africa, or the Middle east.
@amyr9909
Жыл бұрын
I could not believe what I was hearing in the first minute! Huamei, if you ever happen to read this, that interviewer is so rude, wrong, and hurtful. You are strong and intelligent. You are beautiful. You are inspirational. I hope you never settle for anything less than what you deserve. I, a woman from across the sea, am looking at you so fondly.
@rebeccaa7471
4 жыл бұрын
Her parents wanted her to be highly educated so that she could be "like a man" or equal to them having a son. Then when she becomes empowered through that education suddenly they have a problem. Wanting progress while wanting to remain the same. Double standards for women everywhere.
@scalaronalto708
4 жыл бұрын
Hello Rebecca am Scala
@scalaronalto708
4 жыл бұрын
How are you
@randomperson-uy7kc
4 жыл бұрын
It's sad that this is reality. That's why I think cornavirus is doing us a big favor.
@YugeYun
4 жыл бұрын
Yeah it's the patriarchal society, ruled by men. It's sickening. My mom was the same. Their family wanted to have a son, but instead they got 3 daughters. She was the youngest and tried to be the boy, they never had. She is quite masculine and has been the head of our family. Highly educated and in high position at working life, but I still feel there was a part in her that was deeply hurt of her father making her feel, she was a disappointment just for having been born as a girl.
@AlexanderTheGreat1991
4 жыл бұрын
Feminism is cancer. Deal with it :D
@literallynothingatall8175
4 жыл бұрын
"I have high standards. He must be well educated and respect woman" If THAT is high standards in China, i feel so bad for the woman who are taken.
@jammienguyen69
4 жыл бұрын
Same. I'm Vietnamese What she thinks is a high standard, It's just the basic every body needs to be a real human
@MyNguyen-gv2ip
4 жыл бұрын
@@jammienguyen69 asa fellow Vietnamese I feel like at least standards in Vietnam is a bit better but unfortunately it still shame single people tho
@jammienguyen69
4 жыл бұрын
@@MyNguyen-gv2ipI think in Vietnam,there isn't a general standard for everyone, most woman want to marry someone at the the same level as them.
@MyNguyen-gv2ip
4 жыл бұрын
@@jammienguyen69 yeah, for women in their 20s their standards are more realistic but younger then that? Eh, not so much
@alisa9040
4 жыл бұрын
@@jammienguyen69 honestly, even in America, there's been research that shows when there's educational differences between husband and wife, they're more likely to get divorced. (If ever you want a fun research topic, risk factors for divorce is a great, easy to read and understand topic. And there's so much peer reviewed research on this topic!) So this feels more like common sense than anything else.
@phoenix5054
4 жыл бұрын
"Who has a happy life after marriage?" If marrying doesn't make you happy, why bother doing it?
@TDK2K
4 жыл бұрын
it's the mainland chinese brainwashed way of doing things.
@goldcherries
4 жыл бұрын
When you come from poor circumstances, you get married to strengthen your financial life. It's the western romanticism that seems to forget this reality. Not everyone can afford to wait for love. For those who make a marriage work despite not being madly in love, I salute them.
@phoenix5054
4 жыл бұрын
@@goldcherries She's got a law degree. WTF are you talking about?
@kerlylapaine7093
4 жыл бұрын
Edge one person being in a different circumstance than everyone else doesn’t change the culture.
@jewjewabrams4113
4 жыл бұрын
You do it for your country
@Kwizii
3 жыл бұрын
The dad says he did everything to support her, but I see no support at all, at least emotionally. He was thinking of himself and his status when he did all he did.
@sammann3577
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/jo-iyailsYuDgqA in this video she gets married she has over came misogyny and her own expectation
@user-fz8su1dg1w
2 жыл бұрын
I've just seen the full documentary, it's a pity they don't show the rest here. She decides to get another university degree in France. Before leaving, she goes to see her family again and her father is so sweet and supportive, even her awful sister is really nice to her. Her father said some really touching things that actually made me understand him a lot better. He also said to her that she brings him honour. At the end of the documentary it said that after graduating in France, she got a job offer in Germany, where she now lives with her husband.
@sammann3577
2 жыл бұрын
@@user-fz8su1dg1w awful sister stfu she choose career over marriage no man wants a career women
@user-fz8su1dg1w
2 жыл бұрын
@@sammann3577 well, she has a career and a husband. Her husband wants a career woman, and so do millions of other men - secure, self-confident men. Insecure boys want to turn their wives to servants to boss them around.
@sennataylor592
3 жыл бұрын
Her family is suffering, and now they want her to suffer the same. She’s just trying to find a partner who will respect her and treat her well. It’s not unreasonable at all. It’s frustrating when older generations refuse to recognize changes in society.
3 жыл бұрын
They refuse to believe it could be better.
@ToThoseWhoVanished
3 жыл бұрын
They r just jealous. The older know we have missed the chance for no fault on their part. Time changes, they can't accept it.
@lg7855
3 жыл бұрын
@Ed Vargas the male cope
@twoshakesofaratsass4748
3 жыл бұрын
@Ed Vargas Respect for one's choices is deserved, not earned. She doesn't need to be anything or do anything for her own life choices to be respected
@spectra4265
3 жыл бұрын
@Ed Vargas you’re COMPLETELY missing the point lol
@justalostlocal
4 жыл бұрын
"You don't care. You only do whatever you want." Yes, lady. She's an adult who's entitled to making her own choices in life. And you actually care? You guys are shaming her to get what you want out of her existence and worse under the pretence of love. The fact this family and many more in China are treating their daughters like resources makes me sick to my stomach.
@eep1542
4 жыл бұрын
From the conversation, i can tell that the family has traditional mindset and they worried about her being alone in the later part of her life. They worried nobody will take care of her when she is older and when she is sick. If she decided to be single, she needs to convince her family that she can take care of herself in her old age alone, eg save a lot of money, a good health insurance, or do proper planning for her old age. Otherwise the family will always be worried of her and will always urged her to get married so that someone can take care of her.
@IllinoisTrafficAttorney
4 жыл бұрын
It's complicated in part because families are the primary social safety net for elderly chinese people. In many ways, she may need to have children to depend on to support her in later years. She may be able to provide for herself but she is blazing a new path in her parents' eyes. To remain single and support yourself means that they have to worry about that because it is a calculated risk. Now, that being said, the way the government and society at large are treating women's fertility as a commodity in a post one child policy world is pretty messed up.
@truffaut650truffaut6
4 жыл бұрын
@@eep1542 like africa
@truffaut650truffaut6
4 жыл бұрын
I am sure she supports her family financially and she is saving for her old age. The family is backward minded.
@jackiemontrose1279
4 жыл бұрын
Ee P women take care of men not the other way around
@riceball1232
4 жыл бұрын
“I worked in the mud to support you” so that her daughter will do whatever they want her to do. Typical emotional blackmailing from Chinese parents. It’s so sad she’s so educated and can think for herself, but her family and relatives are just not on her level. She seems happy and fulfilled, and has definitely risen above her poor upbringing. Good for her and people really should let her be.
@sweetambitions2381
4 жыл бұрын
mambou ja She will never escape the parents though. Chinese parents like to lab we about how hard they work to raise their children and how those children are so ungrateful if they don’t agree.
4 жыл бұрын
Sweet Ambitions, But their problem is her being not married and childless. If she finds that out of china, will this still be a problem for them? If yes, they will just be trolling at this point!
@jingyuanchen1
4 жыл бұрын
All Chinese parents are masters of blackmailing and making you feel guilty in order to get what they want
@jingyuanchen1
4 жыл бұрын
Sweet Ambitions all Chinese parents repeats the mantra of “how hard I work for you” like robots but they will work same if they didn’t have kids...
@sayedarumi8736
4 жыл бұрын
Well said👍
@jesuscastellanos6718
2 жыл бұрын
She is educated, successful, and pretty. Most families would die to have a daughter like her.
@kay.lies002
Жыл бұрын
Amen
@NeyamStar
7 ай бұрын
Fr
@squ34ky
2 ай бұрын
Pretty? I guess the Mondrian inspired dress was..
@jkc877
2 ай бұрын
trust me her parents were not happy LOL
@VonGoldfinger
17 күн бұрын
Yes but we men don’t and that’s the issue.
@polarispolaris4927
3 жыл бұрын
Shouldn’t it be “left over men” if there’s 20 million more vs women?
@ROZYLAND2008
3 жыл бұрын
The real problem is that men are left over and the majority of them do not meet the bare minimum of the woman standers and men are lacking of many traits and means to attract a woman into marry him to win her and snatch her from other alluring men .
@fredrika27
3 жыл бұрын
That's the one chip policy back firing!
@EcoStar96
3 жыл бұрын
It's their way of trying to pressure women into marrying. shutting them down and making them feel bad about themselves so they settle for less out of fear and pressure from their families and communities. They use to praise the women for following the rule of the one child policy and called them basically warrior women for it. now they are "leftovers"
@ziljin
3 жыл бұрын
It's both. And clash of ideology. Probably the more poor and conservative families only wanted sons to work. While families who have daughters are okay with their daughters having an education and career. And then the leftover men are the less educated and less wealthy men who want housewives to take care of them. And the leftover women are more educated and wealthy women who want husbands with similar education and wealth. Two opposing extremes.
@IvanM272
3 жыл бұрын
@@EcoStar96 They dont need to settle down for less out of fear, they need because woman usually aims higher. Woman dont usually settle down for a low status man, THATS the problem with a woman that went after a career. When you say "settle for less" i hope you understand thats what basically every man does accordingl to your standards.
@ajbotte1003
4 жыл бұрын
He wants to be “dominant”, you dont have to give advice just tell me if you need something😳 ...she is better off without any of these men who will treat her like spare parts
@charlottexie9320
4 жыл бұрын
Totally agree with u
@qjtvaddict
4 жыл бұрын
The men are kinda oppressed they are programmed to do it
@ZombieNinjaTurtle
4 жыл бұрын
No wonder she's single. Who in their right mind would want to give up their freedom to an ugly disrespectful man like that
@MyNguyen-gv2ip
4 жыл бұрын
@@qjtvaddict I don't think "oppressed" Is the right word, it's just because they're taught that way from a young age and is expected to be "Manly" I think it's more about ignorant and insecurity
@MyNguyen-gv2ip
4 жыл бұрын
@@ZombieNinjaTurtle Ilmao she just doge a bullet
@RapidObsessor
3 жыл бұрын
also love how they're like "as a result of the one child policy, there are millions more men than women" without acknowledging that it's because of the one child policy that millions of baby girls were murdered or trafficked away.
@GotoMaki4Micah
3 жыл бұрын
its because if their view on woman and girls, having more babies wont fix that.
@greengirl4985
3 жыл бұрын
What??? I didn’t know that!!!
@selenaseibt306
3 жыл бұрын
I thought the same thing.
@alyssawoodman
3 жыл бұрын
@@greengirl4985 It happens in alot of places, even Canada. Gender selection through abortion.
@ahhh4117
3 жыл бұрын
Most countries actually have 51% women. Girl fetuses are more likely to survive difficult pregnancies. Women's bodies are designed to survive scarcity so nature produces slightly more girls than boys
@raebutler1407
3 жыл бұрын
I feel for her. I caught the same grief for not wanting kids. It just made me firmer in my beliefs and more distant toward anyone who tries to manipulate me to validate their choices.
@ilikechicken2657
4 жыл бұрын
There are millions more men than women yet they think she is “left over”?
@fromspace7
4 жыл бұрын
I like chicken I know right!! The country literally has left over men
@consciouscrypto3090
4 жыл бұрын
They say this term in the same way the first interviewer was telling this very pretty woman that she's unattractive. They want to make them low self-esteem so they'll accept inferior men as husbands and make more male babies.
@monikapadilla3949
4 жыл бұрын
I like chicken they are mind controlled with lies!!! I am Mexican and I was raised to served the men in my home. My mom knew I was abuse by my brother but she protected him over me. I screwed my mom and left the house at 19 moved to Europe... my brothers still as useless as before ... I am happily married but I took control of my life after 15 years of church slavery serving at myhusbands church. Now my husbands knows he is walking a fine line... I do what I please and I travel around without him.
@nanapearlpearl2696
4 жыл бұрын
I like chicken right lol 😂
@terrancemontgomery9470
4 жыл бұрын
Guys , she’s left over because the men in China want a woman in their twenties not thirties.
@Darcy1145
4 жыл бұрын
When he said he wanted to be the dominant one in a family I could see the disappointment in her face, it is clear to me that she wants a relationship, love and wants a family, but she also wants to be treated as a person not just a thing to own as most of the man wants her to be, she wants respect as a human being and the possibility to be herself. She is a strong woman in a world of weak men, and she is also very brave for facing what she is facing with conviction of her choices, without backing down.
@JaiNanette
4 жыл бұрын
You stated this perfectly!!! ❤️
@sqw8092
4 жыл бұрын
Watch your mouth!. We are not Sick man. You know nothing about Chinese Society! Don’t judge us by you standard
@MyNguyen-gv2ip
4 жыл бұрын
@@sqw8092 just because it's your society women have to chose men that doesn't respect them?
@matthiashenning5949
4 жыл бұрын
lol , the reduced totalitarian ccp mindset shows in every issue ( 'SQ W ' ) -- what a sick culture it has become . She should come to the West to live free and up to her potentials .
@samb123078
4 жыл бұрын
And maybe he will lose out of potential wives as a result. Same as the lady in the video will miss out on many willing men. It cuts both ways. Did her tears at the end of the video imply she was happy? I don’t think so.
@igeorgoudi
3 жыл бұрын
Gosh, there are still people that treat being single the same as a disease. Well... better being single than being in an abusive relationship .
@alterego157
3 жыл бұрын
Well, being an evolutionary dead end kinda is a disease for a society.
@roselee8942
3 жыл бұрын
@@alterego157 So it's better to suffer in an abusive relationship for the sake of evolution? Not everyone wants kids nor are they willing to settle for an abusive relationship.
@lobst
3 жыл бұрын
Yep the population is already too much anyways Lets go single gang
@channelneo7519
3 жыл бұрын
Exaclty. The wrong person will make a week feel like a decade.
@margaretjohnson6259
3 жыл бұрын
a friend of mine has never married, but she's travelled the WORLD. when she bought her first home i told her that being single was better than being in a bad marriage. if she got married she'd never be able to travel at will and most of her vacations would have to be tied to her and her husband's time off. i think she's had a much better life than i did. i loved my husband, but there were a lot of compromises.
@marilu19918
2 жыл бұрын
I don't see how she should be unhappy. She is all I've always dreamed for myself: successful, elegant and determined. She is brilliant! Definitely too much for a simple man who would look down on her with his obsolete way of thinking. She has worked too hard to be just be enslaved into a sad marriage, she deserves a partner that walks with her side by side.
@ninaelodie8016
4 жыл бұрын
This was painful to watch. I hope she remains true to herself. People tend to be resentful when you refuse to lower your standards or join their misery.
@MarksThinkTank
4 жыл бұрын
Very well said...
@minkavaliant7625
4 жыл бұрын
Awesome comment, you nailed it.
@jannamwatson
4 жыл бұрын
Boom! Thank you for saying it!!!
@ohthechitchat
4 жыл бұрын
Nina Elodie well put.
@voodoomagic90
4 жыл бұрын
This is so true!it has unfortunately happened to me many times where other men and women treated me with scorn or mockery and made fun of me for being a woman with "high standards" and even gave unsolicited advice to lower my standards just because I refuse to marry for the sake of it and am not Interested in kids plus i want a man who's intelligent, respects women and animals and is open minded and doesn't want kids like me or a wedding ceremony. God forbid I mention this to others around me before everyone else thinks they know my body and heart and mind better than I do 🙄😑
@laela6289
4 жыл бұрын
I’m trying not to be biased here, but I don’t see how the interviewer told her that she isn’t a beauty?? She’s gorgeous, has a very symmetrical face, clear skin, a very nice white smile and a nice figure. Maybe beauty standards are different in China...
@AM-zr3pt
4 жыл бұрын
Kæla Brown right?! I couldn’t believe it when she said that... 🤦♀️
@Kayenne54
4 жыл бұрын
@@AM-zr3pt I can. It's only when WOMEN SUPPORT WOMEN worldwide will we get a change in the equality issues between the genders.
@erinnicole5748
4 жыл бұрын
That wasn't the interviewer. I'm fairly certain she was at a matchmaker place. Like online dating, but they have offices. That was the lady taking her info to try and match her with men. Asian cultures are known for being far more blunt. They say what they mean and don't worry much about hurting someone's feelings.
@Silkendrum
4 жыл бұрын
The matchmaker is trying to get her to lower her standards and expectations. That will make her job easier.
@lunarikariko981
4 жыл бұрын
@@Kayenne54 same. I live in a red state in the US and there is a lot of woman on woman shamming and hate.
@calilovett2063
4 жыл бұрын
"when people ask me about you, I don't know what to say". Man, your daughter is a succesful lawyer and she's smart, kind and gorgeous. Relax.
@Killjoy_Mel
4 жыл бұрын
It's bonkers. She herself said that her parents prioritised her education because an educated woman equals a 'boy' in the family, and still they'll verbally destroy her for not being a good daughter. Basically, this woman's fault was being born female. That's literally it. And that is goddamned awful.
@Leoo117
4 жыл бұрын
Her dad is so concerned with pleasing others, that he cannot even answer such a simple question honestly. Thats a stressful way to live. The problem in this instance is actually with him and his insecurities, and not his daughter. His ability to answer questions has nothing to do with her.
@TheProcrastinator6
4 жыл бұрын
Pleasing others, and the "what will other people think" mentality is everywhere in Asia
@rdal90
4 жыл бұрын
it seems like our family is very family-oriented so I'm guessing the families around them are the same so they don't care about her being a lawyer. I personally have never been impressed by a women education. Just be kind to everyone,and you have to look good,but that depends on the man.
@calilovett2063
4 жыл бұрын
@@rdal90 women don't educate themselves to impress men.
@sweett8214
3 жыл бұрын
This woman is a treasure and it’s sad her parents don’t even realize it.
@sarahaleem2611
4 жыл бұрын
She is crying as they can’t understand her, she is seeking for her happiness with the suitable man, which she still haven’t met
@MANMETR
4 жыл бұрын
Yes but they know this is typical liberal mindset that will lead to lonely old woman with a lot of cats. They just want her happiness as well.
@ratbastard6293
4 жыл бұрын
MANMETR how is this a liberal mindset?
@sarahaleem2611
4 жыл бұрын
I know how her parents are worry and confused, but People shall respect how True to herself she is, her vision is so clear, it’s defined, she is different than the rest, as she is honest, she seeks the happiness through a right man, not only to have a family and raise kids.
@MelaniaRose
4 жыл бұрын
It’s not easy finding the right man it takes time to build a relationship. It’s all about timing and not pressuring the wrong person.
@ryntintynvin
3 жыл бұрын
She said, “I have high standards, well educated and respects women.” That’s so basic, I would never call that “high standards”. I feel for her 🥺
@ljeans531
3 жыл бұрын
Lol, in China for women everything is backwards
@HaTran-sp7pf
3 жыл бұрын
That's probably because that they are high standards for China. It's like finding a bidet in any bathroom in America.
@sherij9847
3 жыл бұрын
Why feel for her? She’s coming from a perspective not seen as high from her culture.
@ljeans531
3 жыл бұрын
@@sherij9847 wdym? She wants to be respected for her value as an intellectual and not as a woman. I think that if she understands as she gets older it will be harder to date and she accepts that, it's fine. But to say her choices are wrong solely because people have a certain opinion about women her age is ridiculous
@nessyness5447
3 жыл бұрын
The bar for me is not just low, is in the underworld
@aristired6252
4 жыл бұрын
“You’re not beautiful in the traditional sense” I guess she’s not “traditionally beautiful” but my first thought when I saw her was “wow, she’s gorgeous”. Like she’s so beautiful. It’s kinda sad that some people only see one kind of beauty.
@UserFin
4 жыл бұрын
My exact reaction! When I saw her I went, “Wow she’s very beautiful.” Then I learned she has a good education and is a lawyer it amazed me even more.
@money12318m
4 жыл бұрын
China guys mind too shallow,modern days but old fashioned mind
@christ880
4 жыл бұрын
But it's ok when women do this cause its empowering
@aj-sz8mu
4 жыл бұрын
yep. i honestly dont know how else she could be made beautiful. like, do you want her to look like angelina jolie/western or something? she's beautiful, i guess thats my standard of beauty.
@jamiemohan2049
4 жыл бұрын
Ironically she would be considered as an attractive Asian person in the west. Most asians do not even qualify for their own standards.
@ThefiveElements29
3 жыл бұрын
We should do whatever makes us happy period. Life is too short to be living according to other’s people opinions, advice, expectations etc. I admire someone like her who stands out for what she believes. You go beautiful woman! pursuit your happiness and live your life as you wish.
@eberemartins851
2 жыл бұрын
Hello 👋 that’s so true
@JupiterSun-888
4 жыл бұрын
I found the interviewer to be so ignorant "you are not pretty" "you are old" etc... jeez. Is this an interview, or a bashdown?
@kikimeow5122
4 жыл бұрын
Mara that women is a matchmaker and outrageous,it’s painful to watch but is a true dilemma in china.
@prawncracker1847
4 жыл бұрын
chinese people are very straightforward and will point out things. its very normal to them. whenever i go back to meet my grandma she comments on my weight, on my face, on my everything. they dont think its rude and it honestly comes from a place of care even if it seems weird to non-chinese people
@thecollector5243
4 жыл бұрын
I think that was the interviewer from the match making agency.
@kathleenmcintyre4058
4 жыл бұрын
Poor woman! She's attractive, successful and intelligent. She should be able to live her life as she chooses!
@UniqueBreakfastTaco
4 жыл бұрын
2 out of 3 ain't bad...
@FALprofessional
4 жыл бұрын
I feel her. Being pressured by new social norms just so the Chinese government can undo the flawed policies of past.
@BG-it7hb
4 жыл бұрын
She does live her life as she pleases it's just that her family doesn't like her lifestyle
@fdm2155
4 жыл бұрын
Yeah, the idea that she should marry absolutely ANYONE just to be married is outrageous.
@condorX2
4 жыл бұрын
@@FALprofessional I feel bad for this woman because I believe staying single is the best. No nagging, no cheating, no screaming, no diaper changes, no heartbreak, no maintenance, no schedule, no shopping, no upkeeps, no argument, no custody battle, and no lonely divorce.
@Leelz247
4 жыл бұрын
"I don't want my wife to be stronger than me"--spoken like a man who knows he is a weakling.
@Darcy1145
4 жыл бұрын
I could literally see written all over her face "oh no, not one of those men again."
@aaronclay4665
4 жыл бұрын
thats not true, he just wants a submissive woman, he seemed pretty progressive for his upbringing (as they both said where he is from men are chauvinist) you people need to be as sensitive to the mans feelings as the woman's. she dont want a super alpha dominate male, he wont wanta super dominate woman either, you need to respect both view and not just cry for the woman she chooses that.
@lilianorubiano175
4 жыл бұрын
A man who has the need to say he doesn't want "someone stronger than him" just shows how weak minded and backwards he is. In a relationship if one partner does well, then both parties do well. Only men who have insecurities fear this, those who think they are not enough have their egos hurt. It's not about who makes more and all of that. It's about taking care of each other, loving and respecting each other, listening and absorbing each other's thought and ideas, because living with someone who's "submissive" who doesn't contribute to the health of your mind will get boring and unfulfilling.
@casswashwash1070
4 жыл бұрын
aaron clay he didn’t say he doesn’t want a “super dominant wife” he legit said his wife can’t make her own decisions....if that’s progressive then I must be light years beyond
@casswashwash1070
4 жыл бұрын
Leelz247 Wreak & crumbling
@mynoveladventures5425
3 жыл бұрын
I want to give this woman a hug. Her family was brutal. She didn't deserve that kind of treatment.
@RaymondHng
2 жыл бұрын
Qiu Huamei eventually moved to Germany.
@3hpleft
4 жыл бұрын
I want to hug this woman. She just wants to be herself and not dominated.
@whathe4633
4 жыл бұрын
So true! I seriously hope she remains the way she is and I believe she will find a nice man in her life, there is no need to RUSH when it comes to finding a soul mate.
@FixedFace
4 жыл бұрын
yeah, we all know how much whamyn love weak men. blows their panties right off.
@3hpleft
4 жыл бұрын
@Jor Dan Well if marriage is only for having kids and not about finding a person to love and charishe and be a good support system to each other. I don’t need it. nor do I want it I will happily take the title of old maid now.
@3hpleft
4 жыл бұрын
@@FixedFace We like men who treat us like fully autonomous beings. We want an equal not some who will dominate us nor that we can dominate.
@Aaron565
4 жыл бұрын
@@3hpleft impossible. men receive no benefit from being equal to women in a relationship, no benefit.
@laurefacon6497
4 жыл бұрын
She’s very intelligent and independent. That’s why a lot of men don’t want her, despite her also being very beautiful. I hope she never changes herself for the sake of others. This is what true beauty looks like.
@elvis4868
4 жыл бұрын
Nope her square jaw isnt attractive for an asian woman
@mr77617
4 жыл бұрын
Not true. Lots of men like these types of women you're just being too selective.
@mr77617
4 жыл бұрын
Usually those types of women need a higher class male so men who know that aren't attracted to her
@unpoc7863
4 жыл бұрын
Laure Facon You’re wrong, they dont want her because of the tradition in china, for the last time you guys have no clue what it’s like in china you all think China is like america with the equality but no women there are still in a bad position there men dont want her because she is old in their tradition.
@qjtvaddict
4 жыл бұрын
unpoc umm old women have fertility problems that are expensive
@josue-pn6kk
4 жыл бұрын
I’m gonna be completely honest. The way these people treated her is honestly the worst thing I’ve ever seen. Literally the first thing I said when I saw her was “she’s beautiful” then it cuts to her getting insulted and called “not beautiful” because of her age and appearance. It’s sickening watching her family completely go off at her for reasons that are just selfish. This woman has the heart of a lion for doing this video and showing the world how they treat single Chinese women. ( I’m from the west so I apologize if I disrespected anyones ideology)
@paulallen579
4 жыл бұрын
You don’t disrespects someone’s ideology by voicing your own opinions on a case by case basis backing them up with arguments. You have nothing to apologize for, anyone who’s offended just can’t rationalize their own views.
@lauraswartz9023
4 жыл бұрын
Ugh! So difficult to watch. That was my 1st thought as well she is beautiful.
@nours4332
4 жыл бұрын
This is seen in other cultures as well
@pranavpavanify
4 жыл бұрын
I agree to all of your opinion but cultures are different around the world it will be harder for her when she ages she won’t have anyone to look after her. Unlike western countries such as US (i am a student here )Adults dont leave their house when they turn 18 or graduate from college in most of the asian country’s they are suppose to support them financially and take care as they as grow older and as people here in US dont take marraige seriously they marry divorce after some year have children out of marraige all of this is taboo in different cultures that’s why parent force you to marry as dont want your life to unstable or full of loneliness when you grow older. To put culture differences in perspective it is same as parents in US would force their kids to rent their own house and live separate once they they graduate from college or in some cases when they turn 18. This doesnt happen in China...Just putting down my opinion could be wrong or right doesn’t matter won’t lie it was sad to see this
@nnberlus
4 жыл бұрын
This isn't only in China. This is the case for many women all over the world, even in our so called progressive West. If a woman is educated and has high standards, she is told to lower them. If she ages or gets to a certain age as if that's not the natural cycle of life, she gets dismissed and becomes irrelevant. If she enjoys being single or independent, she is made to feel like she is selfish and something must be wrong with her. I can relate to her pain. I hope she knows how valuable she is. You don't need marriage to validate your worth.
@xixi7893
Жыл бұрын
I’m from China, and this is so true. I’m 29 I have my own career. My parents always tell me if I don’t get married before 30 then I’m an useless person and no man wants women over 30. she even tell me quit my job and go home and find a man get married ASAP. I disagree with that, I moved out from them, also no contact with them. Because they are ruining my life and my mental health. so sad 😞
@Xilladan093
Жыл бұрын
They right. U sleeping with chad
@Xilladan093
Жыл бұрын
@@annalisazucchi6745 sleeping around
@livliv2384
Жыл бұрын
@@Xilladan093 Shut up. I bet no woman want you.,
@StephenChowKINGOFCOMEDY
2 ай бұрын
I support you , i am not from China and i am single too. Why need to get married. That's nonsense
@jania8793
4 жыл бұрын
She’s an independent woman and that’s dangerous because she can do anything and everything. She doesn’t need a loser. That interviewer was just hating because she saw a successful woman who doesn’t need a man to make her stand out. She’s shining on her own🌟Period.
@mxchic05
4 жыл бұрын
Atash Hamasa 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 Facts!
@curryhousechicken
4 жыл бұрын
I think she is a butch.
@Andropov-l2w
4 жыл бұрын
you said period
@RsZ789
4 жыл бұрын
@E A well said EA. Women nowadays have ridiculous standards like wanting a man who is only above 6 feet and 6 figure income, which is a very small amount of men, and those men have their pick of beautiful women in their mid 20s. They won't settle for a 30+ "independent" woman who lacks femininity.
@curryhousechicken
4 жыл бұрын
Z B...shit. This is so true. You hit the nail on the head.
@randihigginbotham5070
4 жыл бұрын
In my 4 decades on this planet I’ve learned one very true thing. People who scream, yell, demand, force and berate those whom are living the life of their choosing, are truly the unhappy ones. And they want you to be unhappy too.
@rossei2467
4 жыл бұрын
True. I'll be 33 this year and still single. All my co-workers are married, most of them keeps pestering me to get married, and the very insistent that I marry are the ones whose husband had been cheating on them. It's like how dare you be single and content in life while I constantly woe about my philandering husband.
@mutiyangpilingbabae9207
4 жыл бұрын
@@rossei2467 Wow what a bunch of losers. Just continue to live your life. I guess they feel jealous about you they are not happy and they don't want seeing someone happy. There is a psychology term for that, but I forgot as of now.
@atropabelladonna3120
4 жыл бұрын
It's the good old "misery loves company" saying. If you lead a miserable or boring life and are not content with what you already have (be it your private life, work or even financial situation), that misery and frustration eats your soul and you want to bring others down with you too one way or another.
@taheeshab.4208
4 жыл бұрын
True.
@irene5298
4 жыл бұрын
“I don’t want my wife to be stronger” proof that men are not superior to women. If they were, they wouldn’t feel so threatened by a woman simply making her own decisions for herself. Mad respect for her for protecting her personhood. I also wouldn’t want to get married in such a conservative country.
@arrow5726
4 жыл бұрын
I agree. Disgusting a lot of men can be
@Melissa-wv5gm
4 жыл бұрын
Tommy gibstain who cares what men think
@ntobekososibo2042
4 жыл бұрын
"-proof that men are not superi-" Calm down, Patricia..
@nightfighter7452
4 жыл бұрын
Quiet, you're gonna make the incels mad
@TomTom-wn3xn
4 жыл бұрын
@Tommy gibstain Defends the incel while angrily stuffing another handful of chips in his greasy mouth
@ahleenpollock1250
3 жыл бұрын
“Start to consider your future.” ????? That’s EXACTLY what she IS doing. She’s assuring it’s not spent beside someone who doesn’t respect, validate, or support her.
@eberemartins851
2 жыл бұрын
Hello 👋
@kado4928
3 жыл бұрын
no single person should be “dominant” in a relationship, the 2 individuals should be equals and equally involved in the relationship. The bar was literally so Low: “respect women”, and he couldn’t do it
@meiji1815
3 жыл бұрын
🙄☹
@babawali3021
3 жыл бұрын
The potential husband being interviewed believes he should be "dominant" in the marriage? Oh please -- that's a deal-breaker right there, and you can see it in her face.
@eveningrice
3 жыл бұрын
I'm going to be honest with you, as it sounds like you may be quite young. Having a dominant person is not a bad thing. It depends on the dynamics of the relationship you are comfortable with. My wife and I for instance - we are both hard-working employed people, we both contribute to chores and family matters, there is no "dominant" person in terms of work or lifestyle - however my wife is definitely a more dominant person in terms of personality, and that is completely fine by me. All I'm saying is don't worry too much about this dominant/submissive dynamic, you just have to aim to be in a relationship with respect, love and dignity.
@eveningrice
3 жыл бұрын
Would just like to add - that the man in the video has got it all wrong - you don't ask for dominance, this is inherent. Only those who are weak demand dominance or power over others. Those who are natural leaders will earn the respect of their peers. He is a fool.
@theuglykwan
3 жыл бұрын
@@eveningrice I agree, when I heard what he said that he will make the decisions over tech etc I got the impression he was a really weak individual. Then again, my sister knew nothing about tech etc but my BIL needed to get her OK if he was getting a new phone.
@jotakyininoo2758
4 жыл бұрын
Her "high standards" are basically finding a good man that will like her and stand equal with her, not ABOVE or BELOW her. That's a reasonable standard
@kareldolezel1293
4 жыл бұрын
The problem is that she judges "her level" through her career, because that’s what she’s looking for in her man, but men don’t look on woman’s socioeconomic status when choosing their partner.
@user-xb1ol9bc9n
4 жыл бұрын
Oh dude, you don’t know Chinese man. At least in my parent’ generation, women are not supposed to tell men what to do on something, for example, women are not supposed to tell men how to drive while driving, not supposed to tell men how to see the directions. I also believe there are such men I mentioned above in the western countries, but the proportion should be much less than that of China, or many Asian countries. Just want to say how poor these men who can only get feelings of achievement by dominating their wives...
@what3vaaa251
4 жыл бұрын
It’s super rare to find such high standard men in China as a lot of them were raised as spoiled emperors.
@Chocolettino
4 жыл бұрын
Jotaky Ininoo Depends on the culture.
@spark300c
4 жыл бұрын
well if women have a good career the chances are not many men want her that her equal. instead its men that below her that want her. Its all about economic balance but women still go off patriarchy. If women want economic freedom they must be willing to date down.
@Caramelpop86
4 жыл бұрын
She's beautiful, smart and doesn't have to get married! I'm glad she left China. She is in France now and has a loving boyfriend who respects her!
@kool100500
4 жыл бұрын
Ashley Reed thank goodness , well deserved!
@charlene.n.m.
4 жыл бұрын
Thank God! She and others like her deserve so much more than this.
@skeezerina
4 жыл бұрын
that's so amazing! where did you find that info? I want to read about it!
@skeezerina
4 жыл бұрын
ah i see the link now :)
@廖卫扬
4 жыл бұрын
I don’t think where she is matters more than how she is. It’s not the country or government, but her family and environment, this could be happening in countries that ain’t China as well.
@billiebergmann8835
2 жыл бұрын
never married, never had kids - happy af that way - and literally no one questioned my decision ever, never felt pressure - guess i was lucky.
@KryaDiere
3 жыл бұрын
My 3 aunts kept trying to pressure me into getting married too (asian here), and I got sick and tired of it and I said to them one day: your husband slept with a maid, yours gambled all your money away, and you, if you forgot my family was the one who helped you when your husband went bankrupt, and you want me to go through the same? I'm fine being single thank you very much. And they never said a single thing about getting married to me again. 🤷🏻♀️ Tried being respectful of my 'elders' for years and I'd had enough.
@MsmissesOfficial
3 жыл бұрын
BLOOP. I bet they were like 👁️👄👁️
@Mirasagas
3 жыл бұрын
Dang! That's nearly accurate with my aunts and I'm Latino over here! Half of my family was pushing marriage and a bunch of my cousins my way. Mostly because I still looked so young. Shut that down flat because, ew, not going into incest, two I practically babysat most of the male family population during my teenage years (and saving money for college), and already intimidated them by completing a Graduate degree. Plus build my own business from scratch. I'm sure I have a handle on my life without marriage. Heck! My inspiration was my own single mother doing the same thing and she's happy being retired and traveling despite a pandemic! 😂
@lisamarieashby2523
3 жыл бұрын
Honesty is hard to argue against. Love that you spoke the truth and stayed true to yourself!!
@Tstopmotion
3 жыл бұрын
pretty much true for European women too and also for men... people who don’t marry are viewed as having something wrong with them... the only ones whi aren’t bothered about it are ones in a large family whose parents already have a lot if grandchildren.
@random_person_on_internet
3 жыл бұрын
@@Mirasagas you go girl😍
@readyintrovertone5808
4 жыл бұрын
"You only care about yourself"- she better care about herself, she only has herself in this world
@TheLetterK81
3 жыл бұрын
She's not caring about herself she's just caring about her career there's a difference she's clapped High standard men will go for a women much more attractive
@UbiDoobyBanooby
3 жыл бұрын
Just caring about herself will effect her family as they point out. The rest of her siblings will have children to take care of them in their lives der years, she’s goi g to have to depend on her siblings and their kids, overburdening them in a society that expects them to have their own families to take care of them.
@citizengar
3 жыл бұрын
Got that right.
@xyzsame4081
3 жыл бұрын
@@TheLetterK81 She is attractive in my opinion. She did not talk much about her career - only that education was a way to get approval from the parents (who had 4 or 5 daughters so that was unusual. That it was tolerated then. They tried for a boy. And she talked about what she wants from a man - educated and respects woman. That blind date guy was something. It is interesting that they have such a shortage of women and still will not get the hints. Dude obviously thought he was a major prize. Well not so much he too has not yet found a woman to dominate over in marriage.
@finckoff879
3 жыл бұрын
there may be many men dating other men and at the end there is no leftover. And no much women dating women, and there woman leftover. Anyway, it is a damm heavy classification
@wy4553
4 жыл бұрын
My heart goes out for her, I hope she stays true to her values and not let others force her into a life she does not want.
@sceaserjulius9476
4 жыл бұрын
That just sums up u modern feminist women, do whatever they please, i mean look at the family in the video, they are genuinely worried abt her, they supported her and this is what she has to give back. an intelligent and cautious person could have thought this through and planned their life accordingly, but this is not the case with her, and almost all of you.
@Shahid4Bebo
4 жыл бұрын
@@sceaserjulius9476 You deserve the Male chauvinist title. It's her life and she can do what makes her feel comfortable. Didn't you see, the guy said he wants to dominate the family? I would have kicked him in the nuts if I were her. MEN DON'T GET TO DECIDE WHAT WOMEN SHOULD DO. Get that in your thick head 😂😂
@kerlongsjorlejov1945
4 жыл бұрын
@@Shahid4Bebo Just a question. Why do women than get to decide how men should act? I can't walk over the street without whistling a tune, I can't be out on my own without whispers and I am not going to help a lost child or approach a woman because I don't want to be convicted of a crime that I did not commit and would destroy my life. Julius might deserve the title Chauvinist, you deserve the title Can't Understand Normal Thinker.
@alierchiang
4 жыл бұрын
Wendy Lu I agree.if she doesn’t want to get married she doesn’t have to. Her parents are mostly worried about her having no one to take care of her. She should show them that the society has changed and she has enough to make sure a quality life when she gets old. I’m pretty sure she can find a good partner outside of that marriage market in rural China.
@jessiewang4201
4 жыл бұрын
Wendy Lu I agree, but she would have to pay incredible price to stay true to her values.
@karenflores4987
Жыл бұрын
The sister talked to her with so much resentment and anger. She is definitely projecting. Deep inside she wishes she was free as her sister. That she had the courage to choose her own path as opposed as what their parents wanted for them.
@hyun2njeru
3 жыл бұрын
Your child finished school successfully, earns a good living, and is genuinely happy; what more do you want as a parent, seriously?
@vonn2221
3 жыл бұрын
Her family cant even think that she always can adopt a child, marriage is not the only way to have child if they scare nobody will be with her in her old age (but i still doubt this idea, because from what i see around me, biological children or not ,one they reach adulthood, they will get marriage or even working far from their parents and some even have no time to take care of their parents. So it the end, she will be alone too)
@gayled3059
3 жыл бұрын
They have their societal ways/thinking.
@mermaidmoon2254
3 жыл бұрын
@@vonn2221 From what other people apparently have found it, she got married to a German doctor and lives in Munich.
@Charlie05155
3 жыл бұрын
She even made it to law school!
@sammann3577
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/jo-iyailsYuDgqA in this video she gets married
@prstori3707
4 жыл бұрын
Oh man, poor woman:( she literally lives free but her family and the society is killing her:(
@divyamuthyala6815
4 жыл бұрын
0:56 "Please don't think you're in a good position. You might think you look young, but you're fooling yourself." Wtf.
@xyzsame4081
3 жыл бұрын
I just saw the twitter status - and one commenter made it understandable for me. The (not very attractive) woman is a matchmaker, she wanted to undermine her self confiidence so she would willingly pay for her services. twitter.com/HuameiQ/status/1228442159399022600 - she is now an IP lawyer, she finished her studies in France and is now in Germany. Which would back up the claim in this comment section that she married someone in Munich (a doctor allegedly).
@goodreverend2k1
3 жыл бұрын
I think she looks good
@khoapham8286
3 жыл бұрын
I believe this is only a role-play where some of the real things are acted out. Anyway, I want to share what I know on this. In (East) Asia, women are traditionally expected to get married early, usually in their early 20s (say under 25) so if you are over 30 and single, you're likely to be labeled leftover, either silently or explicitly. I find this absurd, but it is what it is. Of course, new generations are trying to change that, but it's a deeply rooted mindset which will take a while to be changed.
@sandra5teen
3 жыл бұрын
that’s the first thing i noticed...super rude for a matchmaker to say😡
@naomioliveira4895
3 жыл бұрын
She did look hurt at that moment. 🥺
@Shantosh9550
Жыл бұрын
For those wondering, Haumei is now happily married to a German man and currently living with him in Munich.
@jf9979
4 жыл бұрын
That intro was very uncomfortable. So cruel. Classic case of beating someone down to inflate your own ego.
@ostrogoth
3 жыл бұрын
I don't think that was the case at all. Cultural differences might lead you to misinterpreation. In my experience, Chinese people have a tendency to be brutally honest like this. She is in a bad position of finding a Chinese husband, because of her age. That is a sad, but it is the truth. Left-over women is a phenomenon in China.
@yureiqiu2119
3 жыл бұрын
yeah this is merely cultural difference , westerners value politeness whereas chinese people are more casual and direct to everyone which is interpreted by foreigners as rude when i fact they are not being malicious at all.
@laurancestreet1874
4 жыл бұрын
I don't know wtf she's talking about, baby girl is gorgeous
@stickyanddaddy1569
4 жыл бұрын
Right!
@3hpleft
4 жыл бұрын
Her sense of style is stunning too.
@EMDF
4 жыл бұрын
Hear hear! She is a beauty. Don't listen to someone that is trying to put you down. They are just trying to take power from you. And nobody has time for that.
@ImprovementisGrowth
4 жыл бұрын
Laurance Street Yes she is. WTF‼️China screwed itself by killing off all those girl babies 20 years
@ZeeJayBay
4 жыл бұрын
@@ImprovementisGrowth They are making up for it by kidnapping and trafficking girls and women in neighboring countries to forcibly marry them to Chinese men to address Chinese male loneliness.
@ladygabrielle36
4 жыл бұрын
That guy was basically asking her to stop being a person if she married him. How gross!! Shes the one bringing home more money so wouldn't he want a better life instead for struggling on his meager salary?! Just gross.....
@mhnpl8140
4 жыл бұрын
Asian-traditional-man-ego thing ._. it's stupid but it is the pride of many (Asian) men 🤣🤣
@lordoftc
4 жыл бұрын
I mean he said it himself, he’s the product of a small ignorant town 🤷♀️
@blokeabouttown2490
4 жыл бұрын
Did he have a meagre salary? I don't think anything was mentioned about his profession or income. Maybe he earns more than her.
@ladygabrielle36
4 жыл бұрын
@Michal Blaszczak both sexes should reach for someone equal or higher because to go lower might give u a headache.
@nerf7674
4 жыл бұрын
ladygabrielle36 This mentality will likely cause you plenty of suffering. I hope you’re okay with that.
@periculumesse1525
2 жыл бұрын
The amount of pressure they put on her is ridiculous!
@s0fa274
4 жыл бұрын
She deserves so much better. She’s gorgeous and well educated, she doesn’t need to be dominated by anyone.
@yumu5460
4 жыл бұрын
This lady literally said “marriage market “ They legit treating marriage like it’s groceries.
@nerf7674
4 жыл бұрын
Yumu Are you an aspie by any chance?
@kazual9206
4 жыл бұрын
Because marriage is a social contract. Love marriage is a lie.
@sceaserjulius9476
4 жыл бұрын
Oh dear, you are lightyears away from reality.
@Powerfulpork
4 жыл бұрын
Because she went to the marriage introduction agencies in the first place, she want to put herself as a groceries first. It’s not like Chinese people don’t have love or relationship, but she is literally pushing everyone she met away instead of knowing each other first but saying all these requirements like she is requiring a service.
@sweetsoul3169
4 жыл бұрын
@@kazual9206 because this is how people has transformed marriage. Marriage is truly love when you love somebody you marry them i just dont understand why u put urself under pressure by following what society has transformes. Be creative and use ur intelligence
@KeepCalmAndCarrieOn1
4 жыл бұрын
Everyone talking about the rude interviewer but Jesus Christ her family is so rude and unsupportive and judgmental. Really gives my flashbacks to the trauma I had growing up too
@poodleman3356
4 жыл бұрын
oh cmon youre some spoiled american who thinks you know what it means to be a real chinese woman. Just stop, not everytihng is about you kid
@laevan2053
4 жыл бұрын
Ridiculousness, you spout.
@meriananizer
4 жыл бұрын
they are worried because the society they live in, they really support her in her career, but a career isnt everything. And people is like that in China , so i think she is used to that, but maybe she´s been listening the same soooooooo many times
@cynthiabiel7714
4 жыл бұрын
The family just waited till someone mentioned marriage and the frenzy began...Their worry is: Who will take care of her when she is sick or old.................that IS valid point...but the bullying is not loving............that one sister is hard to take.. her mother seems very worried.......I had a Friend from Hong Kong..( not even mainland China).....she left teaching and came to the US with her savings...began a life here.....she was about 30....I asked if her family worried...she said.... her mother only cared about the boys...............
@joesmith4546
4 жыл бұрын
Lord Lucan how is she spoiled? How is she causing the west to fall? How is she not listening to common sense?
@tatiananaugolnykh
2 жыл бұрын
I am 44 and a widow. Regardless of a physical appearance, who you are inside is more important than anything, even money. If a person is kind, it shows. This young lady is special and extremely beautiful in both ways. It's OK to be you regardless of society standards-cherish you, cherish life - you make the world beautiful !
@withyoctopus
4 жыл бұрын
She is a lawyer and the guy wants to choose her cell phones. Disgusting.
@Winterice666
4 жыл бұрын
Melanin Warrior Your ridiculous. I feel sorry for you. Maybe then better marry a child if you can‘t handle an adult woman?
@withyoctopus
4 жыл бұрын
@Melanin Warrior Women are people. We're more similar to men than different from them. You can find a woman who wants you to decide everything for her. Nobody takes that from you. Why are you so aggressive when somebody doesn't want that for themselves?
@healinggrounds19
4 жыл бұрын
@Melanin Warrior you can't handle a real adult woman. THAT'S why you'll be with a woman-child. Someone lesser so you can pretend to be Great.
@prettygurlrockx
4 жыл бұрын
Melanin Warrior You write all this and yet you called Withy Octopus arrogant and hoped that she isn’t married because apparently you think she is a woman who acts like a man. You said to someone else that they should “try acting like a woman” and then you threw in some talk about transgenders and homosexuals out of nowhere. Then you pull a complete 180 and start talking about how you think women are equal to men but your words so far have said other wise and it honestly feels like it was written by two different people. And all of this stemmed from a comment that called the man wanting to control everything about his wife, even down to her cellphone, disgusting which is apparently something you agree with as you said you don’t support when a woman lets a man make all their decisions for them so why did you even write your first comment in the first place?
@stinkybub9436
4 жыл бұрын
@Melanin Warrior Jesus regrets dying for ninnies like you. Go get a woman and get off the internet. Do manly things instead of yapping online.
@SuperAvocadoo
3 жыл бұрын
The moment her toxic family tried to play guilt-tripping on her, it made me rage so hard.
@birdieculture
3 жыл бұрын
Bullies were once bullied... Everyone is so toxic mannnnn
@PikaPluff
3 жыл бұрын
i wouIdn't say toxic but rather unforgiving to change from society's standards. its pretty hard to do, the onIy way to get out of that is for the person to prove them wrong.
@betc293
3 жыл бұрын
@@PikaPluff Or to grow away from it and to be the positive influence. Cause the reality is society isn't changing fast enough for us. I always tell people to build yourself up so people like that don't mess with your future and those around you who will be affected by them. People complain about those who are privileged but alot of privileged people built their own protections for a reason. Thats why I have a community of people around me who are willing to help those who want the help to get to place where those protections are a possibility.I just wish time wouldn't go so quickly.
@pinkylemonn
3 жыл бұрын
her family just so conservative coz they live around closed minded people which is stupid
@myrnaskogland1268
3 жыл бұрын
my reaction too, I think deep down, her sisters are jealous and marriage for them is a burden they must endure. Her sister said marriage is not comfortable state. The tradition of women as brood mares for the husband's family is the only thing important in a family. A wife has no right to personal happiness or kindness from her husband or his family. She is there to be a work horse, and bear sons and God help her if she can't. How her family got a way with more children is interesting. The state when she was born allowed only one child. A girl child was either exposed or sent to an state facility or was aborted . If your second pregnacy was discovered, an abortion up to nine months was forced on the mother. How they had 5 daughters and no one reported them, is very unusable . Now , China has stopped foreign adoptions, these children will wither away with the state]s blessing. These institutions are overwhelmingly female, if a child is disabled, they get rid of the child. The only boys are those with disabilities , unwanted as well. The hospitals have dying rooms for girl babies to be left to die. Government is unconcerned about that, but unhappy marriages with children is a must. How to change that, a crisis of no children and an overwhelming elderly population with no one to work or take care of them is going to happen, The society will fall apart. I do think there will be a solution unless they force a law that every single woman must be married to multiple husbands. Now there is a 2 children limit, how many men must a woman marry? each husband allowed 2 babies? 5 husbands , plus 2 each man=10 children way above the 2 limit. This idea don't make sense let alone a woman having to submit to the demands of 5 men and their families. In Tibet, a girl marries multiple husbands - all brothers, often much younger than her, she will raise them to marriage age and then start having babies. Oh joy, change your husband's nappies . That is such an appeal.
@PureBeauty511
4 жыл бұрын
She's gorgeous! Like actually gorgeous! And wiser and more self-confident than most people you will ever meet. China, if you're reading this, you are missing out on bringing wonderful people like this young lady into your hearts, homes and governments for the sake of outdated tradition and vanity. Get your heads out of your butts and actually learn what this video is trying to tell you. You want to be genuinely happy? Don't be afraid to live the life you want, and don't keep others from living their lives. They only get one.
@arrjee9474
4 жыл бұрын
PureBeauty511 I concur.
@tylerstevens1904
2 жыл бұрын
I've stopped this at 1:04. I'm astounded she's still putting up with this woman.
@Immaculate_he4rt
3 жыл бұрын
If the men outnumber the women by millions shouldn’t they be the “leftovers”? I’m sure the point has been made already but seriously.
@ExploreSoilLife
3 жыл бұрын
No human no mater what gender, race, class, color, ethnicity should EVER be considered "leftover". Seriously: your comment says more about you. That men outnumber women has nothing to do with the value of a woman who can think for herself and be self-sufficient. If anything she is to me MORE respected.
@Immaculate_he4rt
3 жыл бұрын
@@ExploreSoilLife you think you really did something there huh? I dont disagree that no human should be labeled a “leftover” but you’re clearly not reading my comment through the lens of someone who has experienced living in a patriarchal society as a woman.
@elizabethdacosta1182
3 жыл бұрын
@@Immaculate_he4rt I agree, it makes me sick to my stomach how they got to have such a huge male population aswell. All those baby girls aborted or abandoned just because they were female.. horrific.
@TheBLACKboard65
3 жыл бұрын
@HALLEY WENTWORTH - I've read a lot of the comments and this point hadn't been made. EXCELLENT observation!!
@i.cant.sleep.anymore
3 жыл бұрын
Men are fragile, so you know they would just call those unmarried men "bachelors"
@inuremaverick
3 жыл бұрын
It feels so uncomfortable to see her being pelted on all sides in this entire video; the hurtful rudeness of the interviewer, low-class men who want to downgrade an empowered woman like her into their personal maid, a family who can never be satisfied with her achievements, and a whole bloody law that dictates that she /has/ to get married because of the shortage of women (which practically came about because of this problematic male-supremacy system that they didn’t bother to dispel). It’s a relief to hear that she has immigrated somewhere else now. I hope she’ll have a fulfilling life away from these people who don’t see her value.
@melaniekeeling7462
3 жыл бұрын
Fun family
@taramoonshadow363
3 жыл бұрын
AMEN
@weskerredfield5176
3 жыл бұрын
There's no law in China that forces women into marriage. She has the right to remain single all her life. It's just family matters. Don't be so dramatic.
@s_spiritstar
3 жыл бұрын
@@weskerredfield5176 well, there is now major social pressure for that in China, so both you and the og commenter and not wrong
@FionaMarie1234
3 жыл бұрын
@@weskerredfield5176 oh good I was getting worried.
@katekursive1370
4 жыл бұрын
It's sad when it's about marriage and childbirth when it should be about mutually respectful and loving relationship.
@ceva7727
Жыл бұрын
As an almost senior women in India, I am sorry to say that what she experienced is what I experienced as a young person and sadly young people today continue encounter the same. It is such a shame. One can be happy only when we live like our true self. Everything else is noise.
@alyssabride8265
4 жыл бұрын
This literally breaks my heart. She is so beautiful. Smart and strong. I’m happy she got out of that village. There are so many places and people in the world with forward thinking standards. Male chauvinism is disgusting.
@colbalt95
3 жыл бұрын
But have nothing to say about female hypergamy...what's so wrong with a man that makes less than her as long as he's hardworking? Are they just useless irrelevant people? That's the purpose of the education...not to need a man do get a less dependable one I'd say.
@FB-gt5eu
3 жыл бұрын
she's old it's like saying: "you women don't want to marry a homeless man, female golddigging is disgusting" A 34 yo women, from a male perspective, is like a homeless man in yours.
@ayeyobro3748
3 жыл бұрын
@@colbalt95 she wants better and so should men. She wants someone that is extremely good in what they do and wants a good future. What’s wrong with that?
@louieg7676
3 жыл бұрын
Lol, you're actually blaming the men for this? The woman said she has "high standards" which probably means she wants a good-looking, well-educated and let's just say, rich man. Anything less and she's not interested. Well, guess what, those men she was searching for probably won't even be interested in her.
@omyaairi
3 жыл бұрын
I KNOW! 4:43 "As a woman, you don't have to give advice, just tell me what you need. I'll make the decision. I don't want my wife to be stronger than me. Suddenly making decisions alone..." Like oh, so you really think a grown woman cannot make decisions for herself? Like if your wife wanted birth control but you want to force her to have a kid you get to decide whether to let her take it? Women are people too and they can very well make their own decisions. This mindset of deciding things for women as if they are pets makes my blood boil.
@MS-cg1mj
4 жыл бұрын
This woman deserves respect and admiration. She is smart, beautiful and a fighter. I don't like the way she is being put down by the other women. Whatever happened to sisterhood...
@lalaaddas6363
4 жыл бұрын
It's ignorance.. The other sisters are " breeders" and she is an educated lawyer. They won't ever understand.
@limepointin
4 жыл бұрын
This woman's sisters are obviously very angry that she has had the choice, it seems very much 'I had to go through it, why shouldn't she?' frame of mind. If the sisters were truly happy with their lives they would be far more understanding.
@__-go9cj
4 жыл бұрын
@@limepointin 'youre no special just because you chose otherwise'. sad. really.
@fellforit
4 жыл бұрын
Women make up 50% of society, when society pressures somebody to do something, it's not all patriarchy.
@limepointin
4 жыл бұрын
@@fellforit I would say you were right if it weren't for the fact that in China virtually all of the percieved power is with the men.
@fredrika27
4 жыл бұрын
I have a PhD and am 54. When I was her age I, too, went through the same BS with my family. I totally understand what she's looking for in a husband. You see men act like they can believe women are equal, but once you're married, it's a different thing! You're the property of your husband and his family! It doesn't matter if you're a village pheasant or the governor of a province. That's how things are. Many men, not all, act entitled and are responsible for the breakdown of the family because they "want to be dominant!" Women aren't going for it anymore and are voting with their feet!
@eboigbecharles6905
3 жыл бұрын
Hello how are you Am Erikmikael by name. Can I have your Email?
@emmu3722
3 жыл бұрын
Totaly agree.
@fredrika27
Жыл бұрын
@Gymnocactus6 What you say is the truth. However, about 40 years ago, Prince Charles was basically forced to marry 19yo Diana Spencer. That was a lesson for the world: a) child marriage is no longer desirable, b) grown men who cheat on their child wives are despicable, c) bringing a mistress into one's house is horrible and d) men can no longer mistreat their wives while the public looks on with approval. The abuse of power by Charles is why his Coranation is so disputed. But you continue to be prejudice against older wives whom I will remind you get half leaving the younger wife with nothing. So much for the man breaking up his home for a younger wife! How's that working out for you with your poor attitude?!
@fredrika27
Жыл бұрын
@Gymnocactus6 In certain cultures that is fine because the man usually knows that if he divorces the younger wife or even kills her, he must repay the "Mitgift", face being shunned or go to prison. In many countries it is now forbidden to do such marriages unless the bride is OVER 30 as a June-December pairing is only making the wife her husband's servant. For those who have money, things are different because money brings privileges that a rich husband or even a wife can buy for hisself/herself. In Charles's case it brought privileges, adultery and mental abuse of Diana who was basically a child bride. That's why most authorities don't look favorable upon such marriages. That the royal family used public sentiment and the spectacle of a royal wedding to marry Diana off os abuse of their privilege. Then the family is upset that it didn't work out and blamed the daughter in law for her alleged poor behavior while their son got away with mistreating his bride. Hence why people are still upset today. What needs to happen is for men who have the most power to stop allowing and encouraging such unions because they have a perverted liking of young women, teens and girls. Address this issue and we will see most such unions go away because the men will have lost their privileges to do as they please. Unfortunately, the rich will do what they want because at their core many are debauched!
@fredrika27
Жыл бұрын
@Gymnocactus6 Read my reply!
@lifeinabottle7314
Жыл бұрын
The sad thing is that this is not a singular case but a lot of women in China face this problem.
@theaccentman93
4 жыл бұрын
Ah, the Asian parent guilt trip. Classic.
@Purrl1775
4 жыл бұрын
Very similar to the African tradition. One of my aunts was being pressured to get married at only 26.
@Alexander-od6fi
4 жыл бұрын
As an Asian myself, my parent's told me that cohabitation is normal and marrying at your 30's is a norm for millenials these days. Love them
@mykapooh222
4 жыл бұрын
I’m first generation American and 2, my grandmother has been saying since I was 23 that I’m not getting any younger and when am I going to settle down and have children.
@thien_vo
4 жыл бұрын
thadedede okay, but the single woman might end up taking care of her aging parents. Because the other siblings are busy taking care of their children and have their own lives to live.
@laobok
4 жыл бұрын
@thadedede Her children, who will in turn take care of her when she herself gets old. But home girl doesn't want that, so she'll just die alone, I guess.
@haleywilson520
4 жыл бұрын
Not a single person in this video treats this woman with respect.
@john-go9xy
4 жыл бұрын
Yes, that's how propaganda works. You make the country you target look like really bad people, despite all evidence to the contrary.
@at3222
4 жыл бұрын
@@john-go9xy Are you saying that there are no women who are not treated that way in China?
@at3222
4 жыл бұрын
@@john-go9xy I am from Iran, myself. Although born and raised in the capital city with a progressive culture, I can still see how women are blame targets if they stay single. I have to add that I am not advocating toxic feminism; although I am quite féminin myself, it just hasnt happened for me yet to meet a décent guy that.
@haleywilson520
4 жыл бұрын
Benny C. Propaganda isn't necessary to make me believe that women are treated badly in various ways all over the world. I know that's real.
@john-go9xy
4 жыл бұрын
@@at3222 in America too. And any other countries you can think of. Framing an entire country that way makes it propaganda.
@feralproud472
4 жыл бұрын
She needs to leave China for her own mental health and well-being. She's out grown her culture 💔 this broke my heart...such a talented, bright, beautiful, thoughtful soul, gaslighted in to feeling inferior 💔
@morb0yo
4 жыл бұрын
What they are not showing here is that she moved to France to finish her studies and now lives in Germany
@feralproud472
4 жыл бұрын
@@morb0yo Really?! You have just lifted my heart 🙌💖 thank you so much 💖
@Google User That has nothing to with either the video or the comment. Get out of here, incel.
@WrenMcNally
3 жыл бұрын
She is a lawyer! This video shows that she is looking for a loving relationship and does not want to settle for what society and the government is telling her to. Thus she is brave, and smart. It hurts me to see that her family and the dating platforms she is using are putting her down and trying to just get her married off. What parent would just want their kid to marry anyone, regardless of their happiness? You should want your children to be happy, not suffer for your pride. Be proud that your brave and smart daughter is succeeding in her career and be happy when she finds love. Her happiness is suffering not because of herself but because of you.
@roxyndra
4 жыл бұрын
This video's alternative title is: "How to Drive the Women out of your Country 101"
@Larindarr
4 жыл бұрын
or "how to decrease birth rate and population control"
@qjtvaddict
4 жыл бұрын
Apam Merlo don’t worry the same is happening to anglo Saxon countries
@nonneb1336
4 жыл бұрын
@@qjtvaddict Huh, so.... China + white nations would be the majority of the world.
@meanderer9705
3 жыл бұрын
China has more people than entire europe....wat r u talking abt🤣🤣
@ninaysandra3185
3 жыл бұрын
I am not a chinese but I know this situation. This woman did not fit in her community (or maybe we can say the community did not fit her). Now she could say she's happy, to have a career and meeting friends, etc. But wait for some other years, when almost all of her friends are married and shift their focus on their families. She'll be literally nowhere to go, especially when her family has bluntly rejected her. So, yes she made a good decision by moving to germany and married a german guy. She doesn't have to deal with poisonous words shot by people around her.
@kokocute123
4 жыл бұрын
“You’re not really beautiful” “You’re really old” “Please don’t think you’re in a good position (to marry).” Good lawd this interviewer! How obnoxious and rude of her! In what interview standard is this ok??? 🙄🙄🙄
@brianfong5711
4 жыл бұрын
She might be a matchmaker. Matchmaker = Tinder China Edition
@briancheng8243
4 жыл бұрын
That woman is a matchmaker, not an interviewer.
@conman1395
4 жыл бұрын
I've dated a couple Chinese girls and their mothers are just as honest. They say the same thing to me
@Boyro
4 жыл бұрын
@batsha She wasn't an interviewer
@tinahaynes696
4 жыл бұрын
The interviewer was a dog compared to the lady.
@Kotifilosofi
4 жыл бұрын
It's ironic there's the label "leftover women" in China when the millions of men are literally the ones left over.
@thatsrealroughbud...2394
4 жыл бұрын
Many Chinese men, due to "little prince syndrome" feel that no matter how ugly, old or uneducated they are, DESERVE a young, beautiful and subservient wife to wait on their every whim. THAT is why the term exists. There is a surplus of Chinese men who look at any woman over 26 and deem them unworthy, even if said woman is attractive, educated and successful and they in turn are an old, penniless cretin who picks their nose and ears in public, chainsmokes and hasn't seen a nail clipper in recent memory.
@larshofler8298
4 жыл бұрын
Because men can always marry younger women even in their 50s and 60s, but women usually dont marry at that age. So even tho there's a surplus of men, it's still women who are left-over. Some men would seek foreign brides from neighboring (and not so neighboring)countries
@sweetpotato3910
4 жыл бұрын
Many china men now married with virtnam cambodian and laos girl..🤔 is a good thing or not
@Kotifilosofi
4 жыл бұрын
@@thatsrealroughbud...2394 I think that has to do with how boys are favored in China, so men learn that no matter what, they're always been seen more valuable than women in the Chinese society. Which isn't them alone to blame. It just seems ironic, given the situation they're in.
@Kotifilosofi
4 жыл бұрын
@@larshofler8298 I wonder don't older people ever get married in China? I mean, being able to marry someone is different than being able to have children. Of course, if women aren't seen nothing but baby making machines, the society would give them "an expiration date". Anyhow, women older than 20-25 can bear children, so in any case the "expiration date" is a bit off.
@FeministEst
3 жыл бұрын
Aww it breaks my heart because I know exactly how she feels and my family doesn't harass me about marriage but they still treat me like a child because I don't have children and I'm 43. Society treats you like an incomplete person until you give yourself to a man and bear his children. Even if you manage to be self sufficient in a world that works against single women.
@eberemartins851
2 жыл бұрын
Hello 👋 that’s so true
@ztir6924
4 жыл бұрын
This label " left over women" and the pressure the society is putting against single women in China are just ridiculous! So what if women are still single at 27, 30 or even 45??!! Let them enjoy their lives at their own terms! There's more to life than getting married and having kids. Being single is not at all bad. It's freedom. Freedom to explore and drive your own life without the manipulation of others. Freedom to discover your own individuality. I hope this beautiful and smart lady is reading the comments here. I also hope she move out of China coz it's society is NOT ready for women like her. She doesn't have to follow the "herd", instead carve her own path away from this kind of mentality. I hope she was born in a country and family (like mine) where women are empowered and not treated like this. I hope the best for her. Note: I am not a Feminist. I just want all women in the world to live their lives, to decide for themselves freely, and be happy.
@austriad9309
4 жыл бұрын
If you had paid attention to the women who had kids and pretty much everyone else who was speaking to her they explained exactly why- she is only thinking about herself and has failed as a fully-grown adult. She never learned how to consider anyone else's existence and only lived for herself. I will say that men can fair much better with this and fix "it" along the way but the women- the gate holders to life? This is complete failure. Nobody cares about a woman's education. Nobody cares about a woman's job. Women are valued for their ability to bring life into the world and be caring for said life. You can try to manipulate this but it's basic biology and no amount of feminism will fully wipe this out. Men are valued for providing (which is still OK in women like this stubborn mindset because they still get to "win") and women are valued for bringing in life to the world. With all due respect, grow up. Women like this are inevitably stuck in a sick cycle after 25-ish years of age. They are too good for all the men who want them (relatively lower status for whatever reason- low self-esteem/lower education/etc) and all the men they want can, and will, do "better" than them- if not immediately, then in time because they are higher-value men. I will say this, I am glad she's not trying to marry anything with a pulse but it's still sad to see single women over 25-ish because all of their reasons of now wanting a man will be all for the wrong reasons and there's no fixing it at this point.
@3hpleft
4 жыл бұрын
preach
@Mrlovebomb
4 жыл бұрын
yeah.....…..now go make me a sandwich.lmao
@cryptelligence
4 жыл бұрын
For the love of all things holy, I hope that woman is NOT reading the comments. Or ever reads any KZitem comment ever again. Choose happiness.
@6Oko6Demona6
4 жыл бұрын
Freedom to discover her own individuality by working long hours for the corporation. Way to go.
@WeiYinChan
4 жыл бұрын
Update on her Twitter “Just an update of me, I have finished my studies in France and have moved to Germany. The movie was made from 2015 to 2017. I am happy that this movie touched people. Thank you very much for your warm messages!!” I’m glad she’s outta there!!
@lionessprowess3581
4 жыл бұрын
👏🏼 She has a better chance of meeting educated men in Western countries. Good for her!
@disappearintothesea
4 жыл бұрын
WeiYinChan omg!! Good for her! Women are not just for marriage
@universehasourback
4 жыл бұрын
wow this is exactly what i was thinking that she should move out.
@YuliAnna372
4 жыл бұрын
twitter.com/HuameiQ/status/1228442159399022600?s=19 That's her update tweet 😊
@neversayjello
4 жыл бұрын
white guys love asian women
@karenieeeee
4 жыл бұрын
i hate it when parents use the “i worked hard to feed you” excuse to make their children do what they want.. nobody told you to make kids edit: yall i love my parents okay, they’re good to me.. but i’ve seen other parents do that, and it’s Not Okay!
@jewjewabrams4113
4 жыл бұрын
Better be careful. They made you and they can end you.
@j_mokusei
4 жыл бұрын
@@jewjewabrams4113 Not really... My parent's parents and other relatives are being supported by my parents and they wouldn't be living decently without my parent's support. Currently my grandma made my mom angry and my mom decided to cut off their support until they beg her for it. Children can also end parents if you don't give them the same amount of respect and love that you expect them to give you.
@jewjewabrams4113
4 жыл бұрын
@@j_mokusei wait, when?
@j_mokusei
4 жыл бұрын
@@jewjewabrams4113 what do you mean?
@8scatterbrain8
4 жыл бұрын
Karen Heo emotional manipulation at its finest. that’s basically how the whole chinese social system works
@lilyho9808
Жыл бұрын
She is a strong, educated and wonderful woman. My heart goes out to her and I know a wonderful man will come.
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