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• We enjoy freedom, freedom though can be hard work.
• To be free to make choices also means we need to make them, and to make choices at times, requires effort.
• When we have made a decision to do one thing, we know perfectly well we could have done something else.
• As a result, our mind has become dizzy which leads us towards a destination of what we call, ambivalence.
• To be ambivalent, we want two different things which are completely different to each other.
• It is like a voice in our head that desires something different, but still wants things to be the same.
• Perhaps knowing we need to lose weight but continuing to eat. It is in essence, a simultaneous sensation of desiring and despising.
• When we are emotionally ambivalent, we are tied in two conflicting choices, but experiencing it in our feelings.
• It is when we are dually happy & sad, confused & concise, with hope and in despair.
• Ambivalence is sticky, it stays with us for a period where the more we ruminate about our choices it sometimes can be tricker to make change.
• Believe it or not, being ambivalent is quite a normal part of human nature, where the debate between the voices that murmur in our head can still be mentally healthy for us.
• There are though ways we can dually work through this journey and still be mentally sound.
• Firstly, when we talk about making better decisions, sometimes we get so caught up in the result.
• When making decisions we could also look at the process of how we made the decision in the first place.
• It is like a golfer who is lining up a putt, all they can do is literally read the green and hit the best putt possible and the result is then left for mechanics.
• The same goes for making decisions, if we put our best efforts into making a decision, by applying the appropriate research, identifying options and back up plans, the results can then take care of themselves.
• We are in essence putting our efforts into what we can control, and less on aspects that we cannot.
• Secondly, we can ask ourselves if we are in a state of mind that is able to make a decision.
• We can ask ourselves to articulate exactly what we fear?
• So we can be assured of how rational or reckless these thoughts are.
• Often when under stress we tend to concentrate our focus on smaller areas and will exaggerate its impact; or in other words, “all or nothing thinking”.
• When we are calm, we are better receptive to the wider environment, considering all facts and nuances in problem solving.
• Finally, it is to simply act. As we have already engaged our feelings, now it is a case of acting with courage and conviction.
• We can continue on the knowledge that we have guided ourselves through a process that has served us many times through our lives. We just may have never realized it.
• It is by understanding that ambivalence is part of being human, and while we are defined by our choices, if we allow this to take control of our lives it will only impact our ability to make positive changes in the first place.
• Sometimes we believe that decision making has a magical solution. The truth is, not all our decisions will be wise.
• Making decisions is in essence a process that is built on practice, whereby avoiding procrastination we can learn to become comfortable with our self-talk.
• As once we understand the true meaning of our indecision, we can then evolve into a better version of ourselves.
Негізгі бет Decision making process: Take Control of your Mind
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