Anything we don't like about ourselves we have to declare war on it We don't do anything about it we just declare war on it We got a war It's the only metaphor we have in our public discourse for solving a problem It's called declaring a war We got a war on poverty the war on crime war on litter the war on cancer the war on drugs But you ever notice there's no war on homelessness is there Nah No war on homelessness You know why There's no money in that problem There's no money in that problem Nobody stands It's true Nobody stands to get rich off of that problem You can find a solution to homelessness with a corporate swine and the politicians could steal a couple of million dollars each You see the streets of America begin to clear up pretty goddamn quick I'll guarantee you that I will guarantee you that Now so I got an idea for homeless You know what they ought to do You know what they ought to do Give the homeless their own magazine Give them their own magazine It would make them feel better for one thing That's a sure sign of making it in this country Every group in this country that makes it and arrives at a certain level has its own magazine You have Working Mother magazine Black Entrepreneur magazine Hispanic Business magazine In fact any activity any activity engaged in by more than four people In this country it's got a fucking magazine devoted to it Skydiving mountain climbing snowmobiling backpacking bungee jumping duck hunting shooting someone in the asshole with a dart gun jerking off They probably have a magazine for that I'm sure they have I know they have a magazine Walking Walking There's actually a fucking magazine called Walking Look Dan the new walking is out
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