Conflict is eventually going to happen when a group of people works together.
Each of us stands at a fork in the road on how to handle it.
Standby to hear about the common causes of conflict and how best to handle it from a leader’s perspective.
Conflict cannot be avoided entirely, and attempts to do this will shut down a team.
Yet, we each have individual perceptions, often from our training and experience.
You should not feel that you have to be silenced or ignored; the team will lose out on valuable information.
The difficulty with destructive conflict is that it reduces cooperation by destroying trust
BUT, constructive conflict can increase trust in the team when two or more minds are productively opposed in solving issues or being creative.
The five most COMMON CAUSES OF CONFLICT are:
Faulty communication:
Attributing missteps without context:
Mistrust:
Grudges:
Personality clashes:
So here is the fork in the road I mentioned earlier. If you are viewing the conflict from a Task-related mindset, it is Constructive and has potential learning involved with it.
But if you view the conflict from a Person-related mindset, it becomes destructive and is potentially full of judgment.
Both can be explosive in the presence of:
Hurtful comments, unjust criticism, personal attacks, distrust, intolerance, and assumptions
Here is how you identify which fork in the road you may have taken simply by language or thought:
DESTRUCTIVE thoughts and languages are examples like:
You’re wrong, I’m right!
Why can’t you see that you’re wrong?!
You’re to blame for this!
I don’t need to listen to you!
What’s wrong with you?
I know the truth, and you don't!
All of these are the wrong approach. For a constructive conflict, try saying things like:
What is your understanding?
How do you feel about it?
What am I not seeing?
What was my part in this?
How can I help to resolve it?
Let me listen to your views.
What options can we think of?
How else could I look at this?
What’s the learning here for us?
The ease with which conflict is resolved in a team depends on the members' willingness to abandon conflict for cooperation.
This sometimes requires a willingness to admit you are wrong and move forward with solutions.
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