BINGO - this is my Mom 100% - she also has a masters degree in counseling which made matters worse, because she threw the weight of being a "so called" psychological expert in our faces as children and it continued as adults. It affected all of us children, and she did it to my Dad as well. Who were we to question an expert? Not until I started trauma therapy did I realize how emotionally immature my Mother was due to her own childhood trauma. Even though I have healed, my Mom is 84 and still emotionally immature. She would not listen to my healing process, and turned the tables on me every time I tried to discuss something about my childhood so I quit talking about it. I was hoping by sharing my healing process with her, she might want to try to do some healing herself. Sadly she is too set in her ways. Thank you for the work you do - your posts over the years, and your book pushed me further in my healing than i ever thought possible. I set myself free in the process. I am currently waiting for your workbook to be released next month - my sister and I are both going to do it. and call each other each week to go over the work we have done - so I look forward to more healing.
@MagisterialVoyager
Жыл бұрын
My female parent is also well educated, has a PhD and a lecturer, so I really feel you. Not until I lived overseas for two years for my master's (thank you, scholarship!) I realised that she is actually really, really unhealthy, emotionally immature, and self-preoccupied from her own trauma. Yet, that is *her* job to heal, not mine, never was, and never will be, not anymore. Let's let our parents go and heal/recover!
@kaselynbriker2620
Жыл бұрын
Please help me I’m going through the same stuff and I’m crying while writing this I’m only 14 and she makes me hate myself I feel like I’m the most horrible person in the world please I need advice she’ll hit me or scream at me horrible things If I show her this video
@akatzmeow
Жыл бұрын
This video is EXACTLY my mother
@user-wn1bv9or2g
11 ай бұрын
@@kaselynbriker2620I’m sorry you’re going through that. I know it may not feel like it but please know you don’t deserve to be treated that way by your parent. There’s nothing you could have done to deserve that. Parents are supposed to love their kids unconditionally, and when you have a parent that makes you earn their love, chances are you never will feel like you did earn their love. I recommend focusing on your future, you deserve a life full of happiness and love and it’s not your fault you got a mom who is incapable or unwilling to be a source of those things for you. I know four years sounds like a lifetime right now but once you can move out, do it and don’t look back. You’re worthy and capable of becoming a happy, fulfilled adult.
@priscillajimenez27
11 ай бұрын
I knew a Peruvian woman who claimed to be a retired nurse in counseling or something and yet she babied her son and didnt want to teach him any life skills and didn't like the thought of him getting married and he was kn his early 20s. Knew a Mexican American woman who was a regular nurse and yet she didn't feed her four kids balance meals and yet would complain to her preteen daughter for being overweight
@marcusn.3762
Жыл бұрын
“Why doesn’t my daughter talk to me anymore?”
@Thesecretsauce2048
5 ай бұрын
Ding ding ding
@nft4751
Жыл бұрын
Whenever I tried to communicate how my Dad’s behavior made me feel bad or scared to him, he took it personally like I was criticizing him in a malevolent way and said, “Ohhh, I must be a bad Dad, then huh? I must be a bad Dad.” My heart goes out to all who have had to suffer through narcissistic abuse from one or both parents.
@ark007puma5
Жыл бұрын
minimalize communicate with them, dont react and respond everything that they try to get your attention..
@littlemainefarmer8173
Жыл бұрын
And you know… the answer was,” yes you’re being a bad dad. You’re being very selfish and I’m small and need you.” It’s really hard to hear that and know the self awareness and accountability is never there. It’s.. very frustrating. ❤
@tiahnarodriguez3809
Жыл бұрын
@@littlemainefarmer8173 It’s super frustrating that they’d rather blame and cause harm to their kid instead of listening and working on themselves to fix the problem. My dad got off on watching me shake every time he came into the room. He told me it made him made that I shook when we he came into the room, but not once did he try to be a better father. I shook because he abused me.
@nickpassion123
10 ай бұрын
My mom does this
@ExplosionMare
10 ай бұрын
I feel that completely, too. Even though he knows about my history with mental health, my dad STILL doesn't take mee seriously or takes it personally
@DJ-zd3gj
Жыл бұрын
Most parents are extremely arrogant and entitled, and will NEVER admit their wrongs, this way.
@now591
Жыл бұрын
most parents became parents by carelessly indulging in sex without thinking of consequences.
@km-vl5fz
Жыл бұрын
OR they will admit their wrongs and it won’t count or be accepted.
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
Many humans definitely struggle with denial! ❤
@DJ-zd3gj
Жыл бұрын
@k m If it’s sincere and followed by CHANGED BEHAVIOR, then I don’t see why it wouldn’t be accepted or how it would not count. 💁🏾♂️
@km-vl5fz
Жыл бұрын
@@DJ-zd3gj perhaps it’s easier to blame than to forgive.
@Ana-rb7ws
Жыл бұрын
Please do more skits like this. It’s so much easier to understand the dynamics this way rather than by reading or listening to a list of traits.
@Fractal-of-Venus
Жыл бұрын
Don't let the cycle repeat itself. We often pass on (unconsciously) what our parents passed onto us. The book parenting without power struggles has really helped me to be the best version of myself for my daughter and not just her, but for myself and people in general.
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
So very true, we will all continue to repeat these cycles until we become conscious to them. Celebrating your choice to do so ZenMetaLasaurus!! ❤
@A_Muzik
Жыл бұрын
I came up with a better solution. Never have children
@Fractal-of-Venus
Жыл бұрын
@@A_MuzikYou are suggesting to someone who already has a child, not have children...lol. I have been a mother for 12 years and wouldn't change it for the world. To each their own.
@DarkLightHuntress
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for stopping generational trauma. You are a blessing :)
@SusanaXpeace2u
10 ай бұрын
I will check that out. I have a good relationship with my 20 year old daughter because I learnt how not to behave from my mum, I didn't try to influence her choices or invalidate her or manipulate her. I listen to her and support her. We get on well. My son, at 17, he has become v aggressive and has told me i'm a bitch. Wanting to be the oppositve of my mother I kept communication open and asked ''why am i a bitch?'' hoping he'd give me something, some reason that could be discussed, but he just called me more names. He's with my brother now. I'm glad he's safe. I will google the book.
@svenskanorsk
9 ай бұрын
This was my mom. I don’t know how many times I heard the phrase “you treat me like dirt!” I was a little kid. That stays with you.
@theeclecticlifewithsam
Жыл бұрын
Wow. Spot on! Please do more content about emotionally immature parents. This is an area I'm learning more about in my own life. Everything makes sense now...
@thelordcomanderwhocriedwolf
Жыл бұрын
This exactly discribes my birthmother. Except for the "tiger-mom-thing", which was actually reversed because I am a woman. So while I was being denied a proper education, having a teenage life, my brother however was being pushed repeatedly throughout middleschool by her, setting ridiculous standards and being harsh on him and at the same time he was allowed to have friendships and relationships and going places. How she "helped" him with his homework, she simply told me off or ordered my brother to tutor me. One time she forced him to do an assignment on the computer that I had to do and I asked several times to make it. I had little to no acces to a computer and I was prohibited to go outside alone untill age 18 because my parents feared I would run away and ask for help. I am a Dutch native! By the time it was due and I still being refused to do my own assignment she ordered my brother to do it and forced me to watch. She also manipulated the school and healthcaresystem because she did not wanted me to graduate on the highest level I could and she also did not wanted me to work because I am female. My brother however had acces to almost everything and was allowed to study and to work and to go out with friends. Still my brother resented me for a lot of things we never discussed. He seemingly lived a free life, but I only can guess the severe sacrifices he had to make to "earn his freedom". He believed every lie our mother told him and he eventually broke off contact with me about six years ago. Can't say I blame him. I went no-contact with her and my birthfather about four years ago. No regrets. I still try to cope, grieve, and make up for all the lost years. I have no idea how to make a fresh start as a normal human being. Because after a lot of research and finding evidence, I found out that I am, besides being traumatised for +20/+25 years, a normal human being that is capable.❤️🩹
@domeatown
10 ай бұрын
1. You ARE a normal human being. You are reacting the way anyone would in this situation 2. You are a strong one, because you cut this away from you 3. You will be okay moving forward, because you have already succeeded twice
@lapislazuliphoenix
10 ай бұрын
❤ So sorry for what and how you suffered! 😢 I hope you're doing well and catching up on what you missed.
@phoenixkali
9 ай бұрын
I started thriving when I stopped listening to my mums(often unsolicited)advice. After a few years I stopped listening to other people’s unsolicited advice and I’m living my best life!😁
@gothica3605
10 ай бұрын
Thats exactly what my narcissistic mother said, WORD FOR WORD. I also noticed how her abuse got worse as i aged. I always had to deal with her rubbing everything shd ever did for me in my face. She legitimately claimed to do everything when she treated me as her slave. Id clean the whole house, cook dinner, wash the dishes and mow the lawn. Yet she would explode over having to clean the dining table once a week. It was like she took credit for my work and then called me lazy. The self projecting was uncanny.
@LindsayLoo-q5d
Ай бұрын
Sick mother . You did a good job . Sorry you went through this.
@bethbradley1986
Жыл бұрын
This is brilliant, hilarious and extremely accurate. Thanks for taking the time to write and perform these shorts. They go a long way toward reinforcing belief in myself and what I experienced as a child. It takes focused effort to choose to begin the healing journey, as well as thrive along the way.
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
So glad you're finding these helpful in reinforcing belief in yourself Beth, thanks for tuning in! ❤
@jnnfrcyy____
11 ай бұрын
This is exactly how my birth mother has reacted ever since I was born. She would blame everything on me and my siblings and would NEVER admit her mistakes. She LOVES to compare us with other people’s children and nitpick on us for our shortcomings. I am 25 now, and even today, I hesitate to ask her some basic questions because I am afraid of her lashing out. I had a terrible argument with her last night, and we almost threw things at each other. The feelings of disappointment, frustration, and anger from these 25 years came out all at once. She never even said sorry for what she had done to me and my siblings throughout these years, and from then on, I have decided to cut my ties with her.
@PaperParade
10 ай бұрын
I found out as an adult that this was the mother my own mom grew up with because she is still 100% this way. My mom was like this when I growing up but by the grace of God finally changed when I reached early adulthood and I got a sincere apology from her. She and my brother still have a lot to work out, but to this day I’m actually amazed at how much her apology has helped us heal our own relationship. She stopped being defensive and just said, “you’re right”. Powerful.
@dianatradex
Жыл бұрын
My mom was kinda like this, but luckily I've always been authentic enough not to need her approval. So we would argue alot because she was pushing me too much and I just didn't care, I did my own thing. Some things I did just to avoid "the penalty" that was her drama and disappointment with my grades etc. But in the end I just wanted to make myself proud, my inner child that is
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
Sending you (+ your inner child) Diana!! ❤❤
@sirenthomas4595
Жыл бұрын
THIS!
@bantuerverh607
Жыл бұрын
These kind of women need to be dawged out
@AspieGamer1986
Жыл бұрын
I was 13 and my mom stressed out singlehandedly raising me a struggling middle school student secretly diagnosed with Aspergers. She said to me "What if i drop dead in the middle of the street." I remember feeling a deep pit in the bottom of my stomach. That fucking hurt.
@Alusnovalotus
Жыл бұрын
My mother is mostly like this with the exception of being a tiger mom(?). She never pushed us to excel at school or sports, she was too busy putting our father (and pretty much any adult male in her life ((daddy/abandonment issues)) on a pedestal, while constantly comparing me to him “at your age”. Wonder where she diverged in this excellent example of immature parents?
@Vanity0666
10 ай бұрын
My parents put all of my siblings through school but refused to help me at all and would beat me any time they saw me eating food they didnt give explicit permission to eat after I put on weight from Narcolepsy type 1 onset and now they try to pretend it never happened while telling me how much better all of my siblings are
@TinySkySky
10 ай бұрын
Holy crap this is my dad. I learned at 18 that I will never receive approval from him and had many breakdowns. I have finally accepted it at 23. I am now married and plan on giving love and approval for my children especially bc I never had that from my dad growing up.
@ithseem
10 ай бұрын
This one-minute skit gave me more validation than my own parents throughout my short life (I'm 21)
@possum8822
Жыл бұрын
As a mama of a teen I’m doing my best to be a conscious parent and not repeat the cycle. When I get it wrong I apologise and try to do better next time. We don’t push our daughter to be the best at anything we just want her to follow her heart and do what makes her happy. One thing is for sure there’s nothing like being a paren’t to show us where we still got some healing to do.
@scribbleem
9 ай бұрын
Damn you just described my relationship with my Mom 😢
@bananamanchester4156
Жыл бұрын
If I sent this to my mother it would be an act of war 😂
@latisha334
11 ай бұрын
I had this exact conversation with my mom yesterday. It’s like it’s impossible for her to understand someone else’s feelings and POV.
@Motherascending
Жыл бұрын
I enjoy your videos a lot and love their style... I would love you to do a series of showing good enough parenting... not impossible perfect parenting, but real life with parenting mistakes and repairs, and handling day to day parenting. 😀 thanks for your content thus far! X
@justiney8262
10 ай бұрын
Great suggestion!
@jessebusma5339
Жыл бұрын
fucking masterpiece. can't wait to send this to them.
@remi_ie
11 ай бұрын
Hurts a little how accurate this is to me and my mum, i love her a lot but growing up trying to comfort her regularly when she would be in these moods was hard. I still can’t seem to say anything to help and i end up normally just sitting there listening to her spiral. And you’re right I am super perfectionist and I do still struggle with doing things that my mum would disapprove of.
@fluxfaun5155
Жыл бұрын
I'm following your self-help podcast, and it's been really, really helpful- but I was wondering if you have made/are planning on making a video on how to healthily reconcile the anger and resentment that can get brought up during the healing journey while still maintaining a compassionate perspective?
@MagisterialVoyager
Жыл бұрын
I would love this as well! I constantly feel quite a lot of rage and resentment regarding, well, how unlucky I am to have such parents.
@daffodil1017
11 ай бұрын
Oh... hi mum 😅. Exactly me, except had my mental breakdown/burnout from over achieving as a teen and became chronically ill. Now disabled and forced to live with her 🙃. They never change
@paulblight7418
10 ай бұрын
This was my mom but I realized quickly that aproval was un obtainable. So I lost my sense of trust and accomplishment. But I did have a sense of duty which makes me a great caregiver and also un able to care for others without taking damage myself.
@sploomfussy
10 ай бұрын
this, except its almost as if my parents set me up for failure. I lived an incredibly isolated childhood, I never really allowed to go outside, and if i was, it was never alone. The school system failed me as well and it resulted in me being home more often than not because I couldn't keep up. My father wasn't really there for me emotionaly, and i had 'infinite freedom' inside the house when it came to how long i could game and watch tv for, which my father especially still holds above my head because ''at least we weren't as strict as your friend's parents!" . My mom is deeply traumatised and has always relied on me to make her feel better, but i never could. It's weird, because if I was even the slightest bit sick she would get me help. And at the same time, she preaches every second that she is in pain too, and that im not the only one who suffers whenever I mention how i feel. It's so conflicting. I've given up on the relationship w my father for my own sake; he's told me lately that he just thinks im a psycho bitch etc etc, so it's not worth putting energy in. At least my mother has been more aware and wants to fix things. Even wants to do systemic family therapy with me. However she still stands by the idea that I just need to let go of things and keeps trying to move me on and going '"Yes I did this, but you did ____'' as if our hurt is the same. I really can't wait to be free.
@MillenZaLPhA
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for giving me ptsd. Let the flashbacks begin.. again 🎥
@paulramoie4039
9 ай бұрын
I had this huge ephipany at 33 realizing all of these characteristics have been my mom this whole time but she leans to be sweet kind and whiny/needy but I saw it one day and the manipulation and I couldn’t unsee it. My entire family unit had ab explosive 🧨Christmas because I thoughtfully mentioned something that happened to me and everyone felt attacked and made it all about them especially my mother. Sigh. Healing and being emotionally intelligent and empathetic and naive is hard…
@user-ib1is7ny7r
Жыл бұрын
there was no need to secretly film me and my mom
@fartmagus
Жыл бұрын
maybe you should do a video about denial and how that passes on through generations!
@gillian2325
10 ай бұрын
yea. i didnt care about approval, though; i just tried desperately to make the parents not depressed and see their own worth. at some point i realized it wasnt on me and it was probably never going to happen anyway. my parents are kinda sad inside
@ribbone33
11 ай бұрын
my mom is a mixture of this and an emotionally detached parent if i criticize her or try to point out something she did that was harmful or hurtful it becomes a "well i guess im just an awful mother then" situation that results in me having to soothe and comfort her and the problem never being addressed or if i refuse to do that it can turn into threats of being kicked out etc especially if alcohol becomes involved im 24 now and this still happens the only thing ive been able to put my foot down on properly was stopping her from dumping all of her trauma onto me because it caused me multiple mental breakdowns in my teen years and by "putting my foot down" i mean i just pretended i couldnt hear anything she had to say or would mindlessly agree or say whatever it is she wants to hear or completely remove myself from the environment but remember, your parent has done nothing wrong and you're the problem in those environments (this is said with intense sarcasm: you are NOT your parents therapist) we've tried to have her come to therapy with me but its never about her problems and the root cause being linked to her, its just about me not allowing her to behave in the ways she wants to sadly to the point where once im stable and on my own, i dont really want to have a relationship with her, and in the end i know itll be viewed as my fault
@robbarrell
Жыл бұрын
These are like super concentrated, punchy, powerful shots; hitting right in the reals…. Keep these shorts coming. I love em 🎉
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
Thanks for tuning in Rob, so glad you're resonating! ♥
@anushashashidhar7087
Жыл бұрын
The story of my life. 😔 Doing my best to heal from this and live an authentic life.
@yomaddy
Жыл бұрын
Story of an every Indian parents, isn't it?
@heartsandrocks
Жыл бұрын
If only they could actually say that last part and acknowledge it themselves 😭
@Sarah_H
10 ай бұрын
I'm called "argumentative" whenever I try to explain my view of things and whenever I go against my mom's solutions. And that bit about "getting no help around the house"; our house is, and always has been, a hoarding situation because mom is a hoarder, and whenever I would clear a space it would immediately get filled in again, so at some point I just stopped trying. Cue "you never lift a finger around here!" while she herself NEVER DOES ANYTHING TO LESSEN THE HOARDING SITUATION
@luchirimoya
Жыл бұрын
The way you summarized my entire 23 years of life and my relationship with my toxic dad in a one minute short 😭😭
@ErutaniaRose
Жыл бұрын
Finally got my parents to do family therapy with me. Hoping it goes well. Most of their issues are around not having or understanding boundaries--thus, not respecting mine or my siblings, and making us feel like burdens a lot. Also doesn't help that my Dad is a workaholic, and my Mum has depression, and all of us are neurodivergent.
@catrionabean
11 ай бұрын
Rather than sports or schoolwork she valued religion. So not only were the goals unattainable, they were also subjective and unmeasurable 🙌🙌
@Dionaea_M
10 ай бұрын
OMG my mom said ALL of these things and I could HEAR she saying the explanation part. Because I became obsessed with understanding her. She also rejected me because I didn't bring her satisfaction. She still says those things to me and I'm 27. And I still struggle to believe I'm able to do anything because I can only think of how this will affect her or bound me to her forever. I feel trapped.
@Marty656
10 ай бұрын
Ufff, story of my life. I kind of went my own way but still search for that approval. Thank god I don’t have kids because I’m the angry adult with low self worth that focuses on doing things for others and never feeling like it’s enough and feeling resentful. 😔 I was diagnosed as autistic at 36, live with chronic migraine and I’m only just waking up. I’m SO confused 😔
@kevinmcfarland6724
Жыл бұрын
It's like you watched my entire childhood... Am I on the Truman Show???
@CatwomanMeowz
10 ай бұрын
This channel is making me feel weird…. This is exactly like a window into my childhood with my own awful mother. So it’s a bit nice to know I wasn’t insane as a child, I just had an awful mother…. And she’s dead now thankfully. But each time one of these shorts pops up it’s like she’s back again. Like it’s HER, being channeled into these KZitem shorts. Makes my chest tight tbh.
@Mugruncher
10 ай бұрын
Ugh to this day I have to consciously correct myself when i find myself internally asking things like “but would my parents approve”? Because of course they won’t, because withholding approval to make me keep struggling for it is the POINT and why the best thing I can do is not care what they think, while forming my own values and morals
@ladyeloiseherbert2195
7 ай бұрын
Damn!! This is how I’ve been feeling my entire life. First as the kid, now as the parent. WOW!! This gives me perspective and I see I have work to do. Thanks for sharing 🙏🏾
@Headroomtalking
10 ай бұрын
Yeah, mom and older roomates I just left you in the dirt 💩 to be miserable. Working on me now. Understood you just cant give what you dont have. I treasure the small joys in life. I. Dont. Think. Of. You. Often though I did love you. I buried you, which was closure. Rest in peace. Stopped looking for love through abusive men, too. Almost 10 years of freedom. Just gets lonely because no matter how hard i try i attract controllers. I just shut it down during dating and question time. 😂 You want me to be what you want me to be with no actual room for me? It was nice talking to you 😂 i think that new scorsese film is out imma go hang with my friend 😊
@nemofish3504
9 ай бұрын
This is my MOMMMM. Except she never put pressure on me about school, she could care less until I got an F in something, and even then it wasn’t harsh punishment. Just a short talk. Which I didn’t mind when I was a kid, but now that I’m older I really wish I had someone who kept on me and helped me focus
@DivineDissident
10 ай бұрын
This way of teaching is SOO good. Its seeing it in action in a way thats really effective.
@WaterPuppy
10 ай бұрын
Ouch. The first 15 seconds of this video are word for word things my own mother says on a regular basis, to this day. I've said them on occasion, too (at least the "I'm a bad person" part). It makes me even more sure that I never want kids, because I never want to say this kind of shit to someone who never even asked to be born.
@haileys5224
Жыл бұрын
Wow you were able to not be uncharitable while still accurately critiquing this phenomenon. It’s a hard line to walk, and I think you executed it perfectly.
@Ninjanimegamer
10 ай бұрын
I used to ask, then why'd you have me? And walk away. Narcissistic, emotional underdeveloped, unable to self regulate, absentee parent unless i did something wrong or she needed to go somewhere. Its all of these skits put together. Later, i told my mother how selfish she is for wanting someone to love her and nit showing love in return, but unfortunately for the way she raised me not only do i not love her i dont see her. Now shes alone and has to care for my dying father. Shes finally learning what it means to cate about someone other than yourself. Shes afraid to be alone and she now sees how much she wasted. That is justice enough for me.
@sarahbroussard7489
10 ай бұрын
Right in my feels. This is why I've put my relationship with my mom at arms length, I know I'll never have a healthy relationship with her. Feels good to let go and find those I can feel comfortable/trust enough to be close to.
@Grace3129
10 ай бұрын
Strangest thing about my mum is that she encourages me to live the life I really want to but does this criticism thing once I start pointing out there possibly were some aspects of our relationship and my upbringing that didn't work so well for me
@ravenraven966
Жыл бұрын
WOW, that's amazing... How you are explaining what we went through . Oh this crazy world...
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
So glad you're Raven Raven ♥
@sonnypatel3577
Жыл бұрын
Too close to home
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
❤
@yomaddy
Жыл бұрын
Damn why this sounds like Indian parents? 😢
@steelrain88
Жыл бұрын
Yep, got to that mental breakdown quite recently.
@offensivediscourse8514
Жыл бұрын
You'll have a breakdown because you're not living an authentic life - FML
@virginiagwen6523
10 ай бұрын
So accurate! The only difference was that I figured out in my teen years that nothing I can do will ever be good enough for her and that I've been living my life just to get her approval. Since then, I've just been depressed and trying to find my sense of self.
@lorenartforall
10 ай бұрын
😢 I've just learned I have a narcissistic mother and those words in the suene describe my whole life. That exact feeling of not having a life and the emitional breakdown is excatly what I've been through.
@heatherbowman9450
4 ай бұрын
Love the colorfull sweaters💙💚💛❤
@Fr.K.
10 ай бұрын
This is so scary... seeing myself talking to my precious daughter. Thanks for the opportunity to see what is wrong with my attitude and make changes. Hope it's not too late. 😢
@Dahnvincente13
10 ай бұрын
My parents both in a nutshell but I’ve been slowly breaking that traumatic cycle. I live my own life for my own needs, and I no longer put my parents first because I don’t feel in my adult life, they had put me first *willingly* in anything I did. I made my own choices with going to school, getting two degrees and now I’m actively going to therapy to solve my issues with my family trauma. Don’t give up. ❤
@Dominion997
Жыл бұрын
Boom! 100% chance rain on this side of town. Thank you😪
@superlasse2468
Жыл бұрын
Currently in my twenties burning out :D
@NoBadJuJu
Жыл бұрын
That moment alexithymia is a b that bites hard.
@TheHavasu_77
Жыл бұрын
Damn, this hit home. 💔
@tinaheald
Жыл бұрын
Is it possible for a parent like that to heal? They probably can’t even see it to seek treatment.
@leahannwhite1111
Жыл бұрын
Emotionally immature parents are imagined. 💞
@reikilove2344
Жыл бұрын
SMACK POW 💥🤯 BOOM. facts.
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
🙌❤
@__unwavering
5 ай бұрын
The human condition, BASELINE, is misery. Expecting otherwise is what causes the breakdown.
@carospereman3537
Жыл бұрын
EIP vid. Yea, this made me cry. I know I have to grieve to heal, but it still hurts. So glad I have an adult in me to calm my wounded inner child and know that I'm here for her now. The compassion and awareness we have to have for ourselves is incredibly hard and sometimes I fail. Getting better though the more I do it. Really good video on this subject.
@adah6759
Жыл бұрын
A lot of black parents
@Ang_Nicole
Жыл бұрын
Ugh I felt this. 😢
@TheHolisticPsychologist
Жыл бұрын
❤
@spriddlez
11 ай бұрын
This hit WAY too close to home
@aliciaarroyo6
11 ай бұрын
So how do we fix it? I was raised this way. Most of this behavior I try to avoid… but I must admit. I may guilt trip my kids into cleaning their own mess so we can “do fun things” today.
@jacobmorres9817
Жыл бұрын
this is so morbid LMAOOOO
@AicimounLight
10 ай бұрын
HOLLY JESUS! I AM MAD!! Once again you describe my life. And the breakdown part, 😢 well body and soul!
@LauraGonzalez-jj3ep
8 ай бұрын
Amazing, this explains it all, identity crisis at 40 y.o. included ..... Thank you!!
@andreah9587
Ай бұрын
How did you get cameras inside my house??? This is exactly 100% like my mother!!!
@spacegirl226
5 ай бұрын
This is both of my parents, but especially my mother. I never became competitive. I suffer from pathological perfectionism. If I can't be perfect, I don't try at all. If it isn't perfect, I get yelled at and ridiculed for being a failure. I couldn't win no matter what I did, so I stopped trying. Ohhhhh this one hurt bad. Thanks, Nicole!
@GoddessHabits
10 ай бұрын
My mom. It’s exhausting and I think our “relationship” has finally collapsed.
@palomaseiler8336
10 ай бұрын
First, thank you so much for your videos! I'm watching them for a while and it's such a relief to see (and read in the comments) that not only a brutal and apparently abusive childhood causes marks on your soul and your later behaviour, and that it is ok (even logical )to feel like that Second, from which brand is that flower hoodie the 'child' is wearing ? I saw it already in other of your videos and really love it ❤
@wanwan_anderson
Ай бұрын
"If you don't like my way of teaching, go find a parent of your liking, we won't stop you. You were the worst child I have taken care of." -My parents
@rebeccarobertson9330
9 ай бұрын
I’m that parent! And I’m glad I watched this. I’m in therapy trying to break this cycle of dysfunction.
@sweetypsycho4895
10 ай бұрын
My parent was like this, but I never seeked approval, because I was smart enough to know I'm Never gonna get it, because it's not how it works, love is unconditional, and if it wasn't there to begin with, it will NEVER be there, it just has nowhere to come from. I raise my kids in love and respect, guidance, but no pressure, they get to make their own choices wherever they can, they always have my support and I deal with my problems myself without dragging them into it
@JanineKlingele
10 ай бұрын
Goodness! You were channeling my Mother!!! Almost the exact words!
@RistrasandRoses
3 ай бұрын
Wow, you just described my family dynamic. It’s well known that only one of Grandma’s kids ever got her approval… my mom works way too hard& I have lost myself to people pleasing. Don’t have kids yet but want this whole pattern to stop with me.
@Emi.Lovely
10 ай бұрын
HELLOOO, welcome to my AITA !! Please don't read if you don't have any mental space for ranting, AITA for asking my dad why he wanted to visit me? Today I was sick and having coughs and my dad called me up, he asked to visit. And I said no because I'm sick and I wanna rest from all the assignments from school !! I asked him why he wanted to visit and what is the occasion? Since him visiting is not often. He got angry and he lectured me because I simply asked him why he wanted to visit? He said I didn't care about him and he doesn't wanna talk to me, I apologized and asked him right after why he's so angry that I asked him why? He said mean things to me and hung up. For reference I'm 12, and I was here listening to a 44 year old man lecture me on why I should never question him. So, AITA?
@johnmacanas9050
Жыл бұрын
Wow! A lot of boxes ticked for me. Thank you.
@juliet8678
8 ай бұрын
This is the absolute best format for getting these points across! Absolute genius, thank you so much! 🙏❤️ BTW that is verbatim what my Mom would say.
@heatherspencer8743
9 ай бұрын
Careful how you judge your parents. If you don’t do the work, & hold resentment, you will find yourself doing the exact same thing!
@lilisky7748
Жыл бұрын
My mom ALWAYS says "Oh no im the bad guy." or "im the taxi! i just drive you everywhere." 😢😞
@xBobbyCx
9 ай бұрын
Oh my god. The mum role in this skit is exactly my mum. To be honest i dont remember my childhood (age0-10). But i remember my teenage years so, so well. How much abuse i got from her. She threw water all over my homework laid out on my bed... And thats only a very minor bad thing she did to me - i dried the homework, and slept on the floor. 😢 I dont know how to begin to repair myself; im so affected that im extremely awkward around people. My trauma body language is very bad.
@caffeinatedperfectionist484
11 ай бұрын
I went into this thinking it would probably not describe my mom fully......it did. 😒
@BooDotBoo
9 ай бұрын
Sadly, this is my mother completely. However, I stopped wanting my mother's approval while I was an older teen (because of how horrible she was), so I had my breakdown then and my adult life hasn't been easy as I've had to teach myself a lot of things I should have learned from her and a loving, genuine parental relationship, but I feel it's much better than it would be if I was still caught up in getting my mother's approval... like my older sister is doing. And she is miserable.
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