I noticed that now I have completed radiation treatment and am now on Anatrazole this past week. The medication is part of my new normal. I find that I have changed some things in my life. I know it will take time to meet the goals that I have set for myself and realize that the goals will change. I look at it like this, accept the things you can do and eventually I will get better and be able to be my old self again. Sometimes it makes me sad but I know it’s not forever. I keep myself busy with work, hobbies, and grandchildren. However, I have noticed that some people that would consider as a friend have difficult communicating with me and are unwilling to even look at me when they talk to me. I just accept it as a change and move forward. This disease has certainly made me reevaluate my life and what is important to me. Thank you for addressing these issues.
@justcomment8516
8 ай бұрын
I experienced similar from people I thought were my friends, even from my sister, with whom I just limited contact to the bare minimum, also because she is very negative and I don't need this in my life right now and in the future. The "friends" said "reach out if you need anything" and have not even once bothered to check on me. As I was changing myself, I found new hobbies, interests and new people who much better suit the new me. I also learned to really enjoy my company and doing things on my own, like going to concerts and exhibitions. I selected the new friends based on what I do need in my life and what brings me joy. You're on the right track!😊😊😊
@rebeccaherder8296
8 ай бұрын
Thank you all for your frank comments. The mental toll of cancer treatment is just as high as the physical one and not addressed by most doctors. I have learned to say no to others and put my needs first sometimes. This is out of character for me but I believe it's necessary at this time. Most don't fully understand what we're going through or the relief of that first scan with no evidence of cancer. But instead of wishing they understood I wish that no one would have to go through this again. I try to find joy every day and rejoice in the wonderful things in other people's lives. After all we will all die someday so don't waste today. ❤️❤️
@justcomment8516
8 ай бұрын
@@rebeccaherder8296 Absolutely! Learning to say no to others and putting yourself as priority might be a tough one to learn. However, what we do need to fully understand is that if we don't change ourselves, our habits, lifestyle, nutrition, attitudes, etc., recurrence is just around the corner. It's in our interest to get used to the new normal, life is not just about quantity but quality as well. What others don't understand that "no evidence of the disease" is a fragile state. It's not like breaking a leg, have surgery, physio and then you're good as new and free to do whatever. People don't like to see evidence of fragility in front of them. It's really up to us what we make of our days, we are in control and it's a great feeling many don't have☀️☀️☀️
@debrn4168
8 ай бұрын
@@justcomment8516 After reading your post, I realize that I’m not alone. It’s just disappointing to feel that your “friends” are truly not your friend. I understand that others may not know how to talk to me after knowing about my diagnosis, but I wish they would say that they feel awkward about what to say. I can appreciate that. I have also learned that I can feel good about myself and that I can face difficulties with strength. Thanks for being a support in our mutual journey!
@debrn4168
8 ай бұрын
@@rebeccaherder8296 You couldn’t be more right! I am a nurse and have the opportunity to see people in their worst form. Since this diagnosis, I have looked at my needs as important too. I don’t expect everyone to understand, but just be considerate to other people that they meet. Thank you for being a supportive presence during our difficult time!
@JR-kz2xn
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for this. It is a "new normal." I think people forget some of us are still fighting after active treatment ends as we strive to look and act "normal."
@meahdahlgren5875
8 ай бұрын
Right
@debrn4168
8 ай бұрын
I hear what you’re saying I have found that coworkers sometimes don’t understand that I have not won the war at this time and can be inconsiderate in their words. I know that I “appear” as I usually am, but inside I have changed. I have realized that I look at things differently and I worry more. However, thanks for reaching out and supporting our mutual journey.
@julietimado4381
8 ай бұрын
true
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
We're glad you found the video helpful. It's true, adjusting to a "new normal" after treatment can be challenging, and it's important to remember that everyone's journey is unique. And everyone around you wants so badly for you to feel better.
@scgraves98
5 ай бұрын
This is so true, I have been so disheartened by people and I’m trying to adjust in the midst of all this
@yerbba
4 ай бұрын
We're sorry to hear that you've been feeling disheartened. It can be incredibly challenging to navigate personal relationships and emotions while dealing with significant health issues. Remember, it's okay to give yourself space and time to adjust and find your footing during such times. Connecting with supportive friends, family, or support groups where you can share your experiences and feelings openly can also be beneficial. You're not alone in this journey, and it's important to take care of your emotional well-being just as much as your physical health. Thank you for watching.
@gdpianosrock
3 ай бұрын
I recall a psych class where we discussed the negative effects of “shoulding on yourself” and “musterbating” (“I must do this…”). This video was a good reminder! Ps i think those quotes were attributed to Maslow (?)
@yerbba
2 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing that insight! It's so true-being kind to ourselves and avoiding "shoulding" can make a big difference in our mental well-being. We're glad the video was a good reminder for you. And yes, those quotes are often associated with Maslow.
@mishka_bear
8 ай бұрын
This video comes at a very crucial time for me, as I am just starting my 4th month of neoadjuvant chemotherapy. The first three months I "sailed through" and now that fatigue and neuropathy have hit me, I am really struggling. Before cancer I was an active athlete, basically living in the gym and now I 'm out of breath tying my shoelaces. For the first time in this whole journey I feel angry and discouraged about how long this whole thing would last. The tip of creating new stories is a really helpful one and I'll bring it to my therapist next time I see them, so we can try and figure some new narratives
@justcomment8516
8 ай бұрын
Cancer is a teacher, and we learn a lot about ourselves, it will take as long as necessary for our body to heal. Anger and any negative thoughts are bad for you right now, better praise yourself and your body for handling the treatment so well. This will pass and you will be back in the gym and to your athletic endeavors soon enough, sometimes life has additional plans for us. Just hang in there and remember that you're doing this just for you and you're doing great!🙂
@mishka_bear
8 ай бұрын
@@justcomment8516 This is true, it really has been a great teacher in so many ways - budgeting time and energy, communicating needs, learning to rely on others. I've been trying to stay curious about the changes and lessons. Anger seems to be one of those new lessons I have to learn. To be completely honest, I feel that I need to also make space for it, not to try to blindly suppress it. I don't think that would be good for me either. I have PTSD from some events in my past and I tried to just chase away or push down the anger then and I think it just stayed in my body, causing all sorts of small complaints - headaches, stiff muscles... I don't want to make this mistake now. I would like to process it and adjust to the new normal. But it's such a difficult emotion 😔
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for watching and sharing your experience. It's completely normal to feel angry and discouraged at times, especially when facing such significant changes. Bringing up the idea of creating new narratives with your therapist sounds like a great step forward.
@shathaomar1516
3 ай бұрын
@@justcomment8516Thank you for your comment. You are right. We should praise ourselves and body to handle this treatment. And praise lord who gives us this power and patience. We should stay positive and strong no matter what.
@HL-qv3yd
8 ай бұрын
After c diagnosis life will never be same mentally, soul crushing.
@rebeccaherder8296
8 ай бұрын
It is definitely a big deal and we experience a large range of emotions. Please know that you are not alone in that. Sometimes it will be soul crushing but other times it will be better and as long as you are alive you can find joy and that is my hope for you today. 🩷🩷
@HL-qv3yd
8 ай бұрын
@@rebeccaherder8296 thank you so much
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
Receiving a cancer diagnosis can indeed profoundly impact one's life, affecting not just the body but also the mind and spirit. Thank you for sharing.
@Cheryl-t7b
Ай бұрын
I've been doagnosed with grade 1 IDC. Even though my tumor is small and low grade I know in my heart that my life will probably never be the same again. I know I'll probably be fine, but at 63 I'm a fairly old dog who will probably have some difficulty learning new tricks. Thank you for this video!
@yerbba
Ай бұрын
It’s completely normal to feel that life will change after a diagnosis, even with a small, low-grade tumor. Take things one step at a time. Remember that it’s okay to feel this way and our Yerbba community is here for you every step of the way.
@rebeccaherder8296
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for this very valuable video. I was fortunate to have the support of many during and after treatment. It is frustrating to see myself doing things in my head and physically just not being able to, but i have hope for the future. Not giving up!
@justcomment8516
8 ай бұрын
If you can dream it, you can do it!
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
We're glad you found this video helpful. It's understandable to feel that frustration, but maintaining hope and determination is key. You've already shown incredible strength by persevering through your treatment, and that same resilience will carry you forward. Thank you for watching!
@jimhallandcindymorgan3545
2 ай бұрын
I almost didn't watch this video because of the phrase "new normal" - but I am glad I watched, as you were very thoughtful & helpful in what you presented. My first radiation oncologist, when I asked about some of the irreversible effects of 4 weeks of whole breast radiation (change in breast size, scarring of lung, possible damage to bones, skin discoloration & pain or tenderness) dismissed my concerns as "you have to get used to a new normal" rather than having an actual conversation that acknowledged my distress. I was especially upset that he minimized my concern over what he said would be scarring to my lung to a depth 1/2" below my ribs, as I already struggle with asthma. His response was that people have excess lung capacity, & some live with only 1 lung. I almost bit his head off, pointing out that he was telling me some of those things would never be normal again. You didn't use it that way, for which I'm very grateful. I still prefer to say that I will have a new baseline, one that deviates from the normal, but which will become more manageable as I move forward. I did fire that doctor, & found one that was more collaborative and willing to discuss treatment side effects , along with what could be done to protect from some of the scarier ones. He's never once told me that I'll just have to adjust to a new normal.
@yerbba
Ай бұрын
We're so glad you decided to watch the video. It’s frustrating when concerns about treatment side effects aren’t validated especially when those effects could impact your quality of life. Your decision to seek out a more collaborative doctor who respects your concerns and works with you to manage side effects sounds like it was good for you. We love your perspective on establishing a new baseline that you can navigate as you move forward-it's empowering and puts you in control of your journey. Thank you for your thoughtful feedback!
@jimhallandcindymorgan3545
Ай бұрын
@yerbba Thanks for your response. I joke that some people might say I'm a bit of a control freak, but I prefer to say I'm a control enthusiast. I can't control that cancer happened to me, but I can remain in charge of making my own choices as a patient, including choosing the best team members I can find.
@gregorybrigando
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for presenting this topic which affects all of us. I sailed through treatment but was drowning in recovery. With Verzenio and Tamoxifen recovery is more complex but I am in a better spot with individual and group support. Stage 3 48 y/o er+ male btw
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for sharing your experience. Recovery can indeed be challenging, but it's great to hear that you have found support to navigate through it. Wishing you continued strength and resilience on your journey.
@nancybrown-holt2222
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for this sensitive and enlightening video. I am going to share it with my family and close friends to begin the dialogue!
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
You're very welcome! We're glad you found the video helpful, and sharing it with your loved ones is an excellent idea to open up important conversations. Thank you for watching and being part of the Yerbba community!
@BeateSchierle
8 ай бұрын
Thank you, Dr. Griggs. This is so inspiring! Just struggling with the "new normal"... Your good suggestions help me so much.
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
We're glad you found this video helpful. Keep moving forward, and remember, you're not alone in adjusting to the "new normal.
@lynnworrell9697
8 ай бұрын
Hi Jennifer. I have some questions about seromas. I am a year out from last radiation treatment and 1.5 years from lumpectomy for DCIS grade 3. I understand that seromas are often a benign collection of fluids the body produces to fill the void where tissue was removed. My question is other than signs of infection, are there other times to raise concern about them? I have had one since surgery and it is large enough to often be remarked upon mammo, mri and ultrasound reports but I have not been able to feel it myself. Last week during a self exam, the seroma I felt it and feels like it has gotten larger and is more tender. I saw my oncologist yesterday and she ordered an interim mammo and ultrasound to check it and ease my mind. I am hoping that it hasn't really grown in size but has just become more prominently felt due to post-radiation breast shrinkage and recent weight loss efforts. If it turns out the seroma has gotten larger, is this a concern to be addressed?
@jeanavery925
8 ай бұрын
Lynn, thanks for asking about seromas. I am 5 months past a bilateral mastectomy for stage 1 grade 3 invasive ductile carcinoma. I am still struggling tenderness and edema on the cancer side where 4 sentinel nodes were removed. My surgeon suspects seroma encapsulation but is not very forthcoming about what that means. Any information Jennifer can impart will be most welcome.
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
As long as you are not having increasing tenderness, it is most likely fine. Of course, the tenderness you're having now is already noticeable. And by "fine," we mean okay to leave it alone. Seromas are not a sign of malignancy. Hoping your imaging comes back fine and that you feel better.
@markiahartley4567
3 ай бұрын
13 years post treatment (lumpectomy w/6 nodes removed, chemotherapy and radiation) I am getting edema in the perimeter of the radiation field. I will be seeing a lymphedema PT. Any thoughts on why, so many years later this is happening?
@yerbba
3 ай бұрын
Thirteen years post-treatment, it’s frustrating to deal with new issues like edema. It’s good that you’re seeing a lymphedema PT, as they can provide specialized care and management strategies. Lymphedema can appear at any time after treatment. You're doing the right thing to be seen right away. We hope you find relief and answers soon. Thank you for watching.
@notaz123
8 ай бұрын
Hi Dr. Jenn..kindly talk about stage 3A,B,C..where is the major difference
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
Great question. Stage III (3)A disease is when people have a tumor that does not invade the skin or chest wall AND have 5 to 9 positive lymph nodes OR a positive intramammary lymph node. Stage III (3)B disease is when people have a tumor that invades the skin or chest wall and any number of positive lymph nodes (including none). Stage III (3)C disease is when there are more than 10 nodes positive regardless of tumor size. Hoping this is helpful.
@bluebeetle493
8 ай бұрын
Hey Dr.Jennifer griggs, My mom have stage 3 breat cancer Er/pr positive her2 negative . Doctors are going to give 8 chemos and then surgery followed by hormone therapy . Can u please share ur opinion on this and can u please tell how to reduce the chances of Reccurance and if at all there is way to completely stop cancer from Reccuring again🙏.
@SofiaAhmad-rp8sm
8 ай бұрын
I diagnose breast cancer stage 3 ,I done 8 cycles of chemo, surgery, radiation , hormonal medicine (letrozole for 5 years)
@bluebeetle493
8 ай бұрын
@@SofiaAhmad-rp8sm I hope you are doing fine and well Sofia 🙌❤ , Did u had any side effects,any problems with all this, also what are you doing or done for it to not reccur again
@yerbba
8 ай бұрын
Thanks for writing. Your mother is fortunate to have you. This sounds like a comprehensive treatment plan. If the tumor is hormone receptor positive, endocrine therapy will reduce the risk of cancer recurrence. Endocrine therapy does not start until after chemotherapy.
@shathaomar1516
3 ай бұрын
What about those who promised to be there and support but they never showed up😢. It is tough to realized that you can suddenly be alone more than your expectations!
@yerbba
3 ай бұрын
It's incredibly tough when those who promised to support you don’t show up. Feeling alone can be one of the hardest parts of this journey. It's important to seek out others who validate your feelings and understand what you're going through, whether through support groups, online communities, or new friends. Remember, our Yerbba community is here for you too.
@shathaomar1516
3 ай бұрын
@@yerbba Thank you so much for your support. Your videos are very useful and your reply and comments are very supportive.
@northwestcoastalcharters18
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for this important message. I’m 7 months post chemo about to finish targeted therapy. I feel physically stronger every day but unfortunately mentally I’m also dealing with the loss of my daughter. She passed away just before my mastectomy and dealing with grieving while going through cancer treatments has been hard. I can’t find anything anywhere on the subject. How have others grieved while also trying to heal from cancer treatments?
@stephaniemacwhirter110
8 ай бұрын
My father died a week before I received my diagnosis, so I have been grieving his loss for the past 5 months while going through surgery and chemo. Next up radiation and targeted therapy. It has definitely made the whole situation harder to bear.
@justcomment8516
8 ай бұрын
I hear you and I feel you! When I received my diagnosis 1,5 years ago I was very pragmatic about it and was ready to face it. My mom, however, couldn't bear the news and died of a stroke some two days after that (I'll spare you the details, which were just unbearable) and this is when my world turned upside down. The first two months were the hardest because I had all sorts of diagnostics done before surgery, and dealing with the death of my mom at the same time. What helped me is long meditation (there is plenty on KZitem), I worked with an onco-psychologist-nutritionist because I just couldn't do this on my own, and took sedatives compatible with tamoxifen. It got better after surgery. What also helped me is going to gym, yoga, long nordic walking sessions, I took up running, which is very therapeutic. I dedicate every day and any achievements to my mom, talk to her in the prayer room of the church I like and thank her for her support with my treatment. It seems our loved ones don't really leave us, but stay to support us, we just don't see them. It makes me smile that she continues to live in my heart and she is not worried about me. I don't know if this helps, but I think we can channel our grief into something good for us, this is my experience and I believe that mom would have wanted it this way. Also, some things we cannot repair on our own and should seek help of qualified professionals (eg psychologists) as friends and family cannot help here. If you find any of this offensive or insensitive, my apologies, I'm just trying to help as I can.
@rebeccaherder8296
8 ай бұрын
My sis died from cancer, and mom died before my treatment was over. My stress level was extremely high since I was mom's caregiver, and she lived with me. I understand the depth of your grief. Friends and family supported me with hope when I saw none. Pain will diminish some with time. Please know that this stranger on the internet will pray and send good vibes to you. Pls accept help when it is offered. The smallest things add up to a lot of support. We are put here to help each other. ❤
@jackimatsumoto5045
8 ай бұрын
Thank you for this video. I am 2 years post treatment for stage 3a breast cancer. I was diagnosed with breast cancer 4 years after my husband passed away from complications due the flu. He was 66 and I was 58. My daughters have been awesome but friends and other family pulled away. My main concern since active treatment has been fear of recurrence. I feel bad that I have such great fear. I'm working on my expectations and have gotten better but that fear comes back. It's tough.
@nancyferrari6743
8 ай бұрын
I’m now in the “after” treatment but will be starting Arimidex hormone treatment in 2 weeks so I guess I’m still in the “during” phase. I am managing my mindset by journaling to help with processing this new chapter and also to alleviate anxiety with a recurrence.
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