16:15 - learning this was such a game changer for me when dating! 🤭 ALSO WE HIT 100K SUBSCRIBERS TODAY WOOOOO! I'M SO GRATEFUL FOR EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU! Thank you for all of the support and love, it warms my heart everyday. I'll do a proper post talking about this very soon though 🥰 p.s. shoutout to the real ones who already watched me screaming on my IG stories today when I found out 🤣
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
Can we are new friends ☺?
@sweetyneerukaur6840
Жыл бұрын
Congratulations di for 100k subscribers ❤️✨🧿🥳💖💙
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
Don't like my coment answer me😂
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
@@sweetyneerukaur6840 we are friends☺
@sweetyneerukaur6840
Жыл бұрын
I thought you were asking di to become friends???? 🧐🧐🤔🤔
@lowkeychillionaire3213
Жыл бұрын
This girl is helping all the eldest daughters of the world 🌍
@chehaknarang6663
Жыл бұрын
COULDN'T RELATE MORE
@yashvibage.
Жыл бұрын
This is so Trueeeeee ❤❤❤❤❤
@THEalishahnator3000
Жыл бұрын
Im the youngest sibling and trust me we have it worse
@shine12616
Жыл бұрын
Factsssss😮💨😮💨😮💨😮💨
@Oni-cf4rl
Жыл бұрын
She's helping the youngest too ✨
@Maomaomahu
Жыл бұрын
“You are not a nice person” I’ve needed to hear that. I always feel like I do everything for everyone but no one likes me… it’s cuz I’m not authentic I’m just something to be used, not someone to be loved. I need to be a person in my own right and not just a manifestation of whatever people need.
@ushaiyer293
Жыл бұрын
True.
@comicgirl22
Жыл бұрын
You can do this!!!
@lindak8307
Жыл бұрын
Well said.
@pepsicolla123
3 ай бұрын
You're someone to be loved, trust me. But I get what you mean
@emmacheney8628
2 ай бұрын
Me too 🫢
@shainoorshaikh210
Жыл бұрын
It's really hard to keep boundaries especially in Asian household, my mum makes me feel guilty for not talking to relatives even though they're toxic.
@xnm2754
Жыл бұрын
I feel you on this, I think it is common in asian households to have a lack of boundaries in place which isn't healthy..have you tried speaking to your mum and explaining it to her in a way she may understand? as at the end of the day you can only try your best to protect yourself and your energy..hope it gets better for you
@xTenshiAi
Жыл бұрын
@@xnm2754 A lot of asian parents don't have the capacity to understand these conversations and they usually end up in huge arguments (e.g. with my dad) but with my mum I feel like she's starting to understand and respect my needs when I sit down and talk to her.
@xnm2754
Жыл бұрын
@@xTenshiAi of course I understand that bc I’ve been going through it since a long time, hence I said maybe she can try explaining it in a way her mum understands so it may not be directly in a way she herself wants to express her needs but coming to a level the other person understands so both can understand each other better.. it’s all with communication and emotional intelligence of course.. I mean I struggle doing it at times but it’s slowly but surely getting there.. it’s because the way our parents have been brought up along with the generational trauma it’s all there so their outlook and their ways will be completely different hence the clashes..
@xnm2754
Жыл бұрын
@@xTenshiAi may I ask how do you do it with your mum? I try to but sometimes it fails.. maybe it’s the way I’m going about it.. I can’t seem to find the time bc there’s a lot of stress atm in their lives to sit down and have proper healthy conversations about it all
@xTenshiAi
Жыл бұрын
@@xnm2754 It happened naturally during covid lockdowns because we were seeing each other every day so I just had little conversations everyday with her to build more trust. It then led to me being more assertive to her (without being aggressive) and explaining that I'm no longer a child. She started to see me as more responsible. It takes a long time but you have to be consistent with your boundaries and let them know that you won't back down.
@kaiipop4762
Жыл бұрын
as someone who finds it hard to say no to people, thank you for this!!
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
❤️❤️❤️
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
Can we are new friends ☺?
@salvisingh2690
Жыл бұрын
@@dhananjaychoubey1772 average indian man being desperate for girl's attention 💀
@shilparani3726
Жыл бұрын
Notes for myself: 1. Stop Predicting everyone's needs. Be comfortable with just existing. It's other people's responsibility to convey their needs to you. 2. Acknowledge that you deserve to be seen, heard and express yourself fully and what you say, matters. Show up, be yourself. 3. Practice the art of self-validation. 4. Spend a day counting how many times you say sorry. 5. Start by committing to one thing a week that would not be compromised by anybody.
@ed000
Жыл бұрын
"I appreciate the reassurance but I don't have the capacity to do that " ~~ I will carry this with me all the time.
@taslucky1439
10 ай бұрын
it's extremely difficult to set boundaries between family members... so many parents take it as if you're being disrespectful towards them or trying to dictate how they can behave. It's so exhausting cause they don't feel the need to respect my boundaries since we are "family"
@user-hc9ob6sn1n
5 ай бұрын
I know right, they called me "Westernised"
@baibby7715
Жыл бұрын
She's the older sister we all needed
@wanderlust_22
2 ай бұрын
For all the elder daughters around the world
@rog6840
Жыл бұрын
I always feel like my boundaries are not valid like I’m making too much drama or being too sensitive
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
You’re never too much!
@SinhaShambhawi
10 ай бұрын
You're just surrounded by toxic people who gaslights what's important to you.
@masterlinx767
6 ай бұрын
People who tell you that you're too sensitive for protecting yourself and your sanity are not people you want around you. That's manipulation. I know what it's like to be in an environment where everyone thinks you owe them a piece of yourself. You are allowed to block them. You're allowed to refuse interaction with them. If they try and start drama or they resort to harassment, you can handle things legally. People need to be taught that they can't just do or say whatever they want to people.
@chillcreature737
4 ай бұрын
@@masterlinx767 thank you for saying this 🙏🏾
@sofeaadleen5885
11 ай бұрын
" when you set boundaries, it results in you having fewer friends, But if that is actually the case, those people were never your friends in the first place " THIS hit me hard enough to stop being delusional !!
@oualidbo78
Жыл бұрын
You can help people 999 times, they will make you feel guilty when you say no 1 time.
@shannonchambers9270
3 ай бұрын
Yeah, it's time out for that!👍 It's time to start showing up for yourself and not let others make you feel guilty(trust me, I know and I'm still learning and knowing!👍)💯
@idkme6135
Жыл бұрын
Being a 17 year old girl, having no friends since childhood, always been cornered by my classmates or other people to facing humiliation for nothing made me a people pleaser thinking maybe people will like me if I prioritize them more than I do. But they started to take me for granted. They hated me when I prioritised myself and now ignore or use or make fun of me and my kindness. You and wizardliz are the only people who made me realise that I am not the one who is wrong whereas it is them. I promise you girl, the way your words empowered me, I am gonna be the best of all. You don't know me and I also don't know you. But still I want to thank you and wanna say I love you. ❤❤😊. I also want to say everyone reading this who is facing emotional and mental stress and has faced people who has been mean to them and emotionally bullied them, YOU ARE THE BEST, BETTER THAN YOU DREAM TO BE. ❤💕🥰
@EasyWhitmore
Жыл бұрын
Thank you
@V_monarchy_3
Жыл бұрын
I am the same age haha going through this 😅 my family is mexican and they are very manipulative and i was extremely bullied since 5 by my parents and now but i lost 76 lbs and focusing on self love and removing people who make me doubt my value to leave my life
@yashpreetkaur1690
Жыл бұрын
I'm also 17 and I have just started college. I don't get to meet my school friends. Plus friends here are so good . I already have 2 frnds group, but I don't feel very good around them ., They're always just talking so negative about everything and everyone. I just don't listen and respond to such convos. I'm working on being ok with feeling bored even when they are literally sitting next to me .
@jeannerivers4517
7 ай бұрын
@yashpreetkaur1690 I am also the same age and I feel like i don't belong in any friend group. But I am learning it is ok to stay by yourself there will come a time where you will have the friends you deserve or they deserve you
@SaronShewit-vh3dz
4 ай бұрын
@@yashpreetkaur1690 I know this doesn't totally relate to what you said but how come you are in college at the of 17?,and I wish you find really good friends 🌸💞
@Blue.clouds
Жыл бұрын
I am such a people pleaser. I am nice to EVERYONE and just get walked on over. But the thing is I don't want validation. I'm just trying to live my life to the point where I no longer need to change.
@worsteditz7540
2 ай бұрын
111 likes
@mrmrshudson9142
Жыл бұрын
my dad always said that if you were on a plane you would put your oxgen mask on first so you should apply the same logic to life and now i finally get it
@melissacarreno6475
Жыл бұрын
I have been watching your videos and they have been so helpful. I'm trying to break away from being a people pleaser. I really hope in overtime I have self-love for myself and my real supporters are going to know the real me :) Thank you, Tam Kaur. I also appreciate and love your confidence and authenticity ❤💕
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
I'm so glad!
@angelface333
Жыл бұрын
“negative energy” as a consequence of a boundary is so interesting! i have to use it more often when setting boundaries, bc often times that IS the main consequence of not respecting boundaries 💗💕✨ and yes! setting boundaries shows respect for you, the other person, and the relationship! great detailed video as always 💕💕💕
@slayyers-qn1xf
10 ай бұрын
1_stop prodecting everyone needs that's not of you business and what u say is matter 2_ practice self validation 3_ set with ur. Self and see what drain you and make u feel exhausted and make a goals to the next week to not do it 4_ set boundaries (physical boundaries, sexual boundaries, emotional, spiritual, money boundaries ,time,non negotiable boundaries ( things that u can't change ur opinion ab it Question _what do i value the most on my week _what makes me pressure _what are my limits( things that make me feel bad and good _what Adapt to this person and why i feel like that _What this is from How to set Start by setting calm tone and discaming them Start the problem State how its effected you and make u feel Be compassionate and understanding State the consequences Don't budge Don't be upset or emotional stay calm Don't apologize Don't explain why Don't try to expect thier opinion or emotional Listen and be respectful when they talking 5_ respect ur boundaries (promises and discipline and reward 6_ give ur self desisons when u are on anxious situation Its okay to ur boundaries to change 7_not negging on relationship Set a calm tone State the problem How it affects you Be compassionate and don't place blame Emphasise that this is not an argument it's healthy communication Give freedoms qnd Don try to control Set ur standards don't budge and suggest the consequences lately On friendship On family With ur self (habits and ideal life Strangers
@imfiy_
7 ай бұрын
"you are not a nice person" I am a nice person "you are a people pleaser" isn't that nice? "there's a difference" oh. proceeds filling my mind with the most powerful words.
@TashaxMack
Жыл бұрын
i love this video. one of my favorite phrases popped in my head while watching. “A lion doesn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep”. 💜
@hs-pj8ho
Жыл бұрын
I've blocked some of my siblings as they have no respect or boundaries for my personal space I've given them so many chances but they continued to disrespect me & my personal space & I sent an email, told them exactly how badly they behave then blocked them on email too as they are extremely toxic people & now they are trying to guiltrip me for blocking them & this is the very reason why they are blocked for life they have no respect for my needs & never take any accountability for their bad behaviours
@isa-lk4lj
Жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry to hear that. Things will get better
@victowiarei
Жыл бұрын
I really needed this. 19:27 Especially with setting boundaries with family I’m just too scared to push them over the edge so I always give in. Thank you for this video I’m gonna always go back to this if I ever feel stuck like that again.❤
@anastasiatribesenkova2894
Жыл бұрын
I have a very specific boundary - I don’t want children and I have many reasons why, but I don’t want to explain it to anyone and I believe that “I don’t want that - period” is enough. But GOSH every person in my life tries to dig “why” and literally WONT STOP pressuring 😒
@mshxllee
2 ай бұрын
For a long time in my life it was the same me and then I realized I don't owe anyone an explanation. If people don't get it when you let them know you are not interested in elaborating and keep pressuring you for an explanation just remove yourself from the conversation. Itś not worth your energy. Even if it's relatives or close people.
@jaej34
Жыл бұрын
This is divine timing. Thank you for this. I'm not going to be a people pleaser anymore. I will learn to set boundaries. I am grateful
@inconitaas1550
Жыл бұрын
If this video came out earlier it would have literally saved me from a fight with one of my best friends lol ! Thanks for the HIGH quality advice!
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
❤️❤️❤️
@tazwho757
Жыл бұрын
she is gonna be big im telling yall!! protect her at any cost
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
😭😭✨❤️❤️❤️
@AnnieEricDSouza-fx6ie
Жыл бұрын
I've just realize that i have always been Athena from childhood and thanks tam for showing me that i was never selfish or egoistic for setting boundaries ❤️
@sarahoconor615
Жыл бұрын
I'm just getting out of a relationship that had a lot of manipulation put on me plus I grew up being a people pleaser and let me just say that you are such an angel right now. Sending love and good vibes
@feliciaogunnowo
11 ай бұрын
Thank you love for this encouragement/advice! Boundaries have been something I’ve always struggled with, not wanting to come off as a difficult or harsh person. But I’ve realized that when I’m by myself or at home, I tend to get frustrated with others and project my anger towards them primarily bc of how someone else treated me. And when I see that same person again, I feel like I should t say anything to not make them upset. But I have a right to be treated with respect and I will no longer tolerate disrespect! I love the tips/ dialogue you gave and I’m going to start implementing those everyday! God bless you 🤍🤍🤍
@loretohidalgo3533
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for this I have no issues with saying no or facing problems or fights But lately I spend too much time worrying about if people like me or not, like being a satellite around them, needing their validation Wasting too much time with people who don’t do much for me Giving gifts and things to people who just don’t care
@user-il3te2ke6s
Жыл бұрын
I am completely honest when I say that I've tried thousands of channels to bring out some good in me but your videos are literally the only ones that make me bring out the spark. I can't even explain how thankful I am to you and to this amazing content. Your energy is so beautiful it literally makes me want to do everything I've ever wanted. I remember stumbling upon one of your videos a weeek ago and I've been watching a video every single day now and I take proper notes. Because I never knew this was everything I ever needed. Thank you so much. You're truly a blessing ❤
@Blue.clouds
Жыл бұрын
This was a huge problem on my problem list. I manifested that oh all my problems are gone. Then, this video came to me! Thank you really you solved a huge problem of mine.
@009.._
Жыл бұрын
being a people pleasures sucks bucz no matter how much you please others, you will never be able to please yourself
@stargirl78636
5 ай бұрын
she actually looks like princess jasmine
@amxraii5358
Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this video , I used to be a people pleaser and would get used and manipulated but now I’m starting to set boundaries all thanks to you! have a nice day
@gpg9891
Жыл бұрын
GIRL!!! I needed this video. You posted it at the right time for me
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
Can we are new friends ☺?
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
You are so pretty😍✨
@bhuvanagunasekaran1
5 күн бұрын
I search this *why it's hard to maintain boundaries*. I got lots of recommendations but I clicked this video. It's the best content for my current situation. Thank you. I feel so lonely and dark day by day. I'm planning to watch all of your related videos. Thank you ❤
@a-5681
Жыл бұрын
I love how consistent you are with your uploads and how high quality the information you give is. Thank you!❤️
@DidiLeahLaurenKenston1111
Жыл бұрын
Just what I needed, thanks girl
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
No problem 😊
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
Hi. How are you☺?
@Aleatoire9
Жыл бұрын
Found your channel a few weeks ago and I just love your vibe, enthusiasm, and way of explaining things! I'm 31 and most younger 20s content feels alienating to me but girl you are timeless and just make me want to straighten out my life 😅
@sunvavachi
Жыл бұрын
Same. I'm 36 and she's quite mature and wise. I love it.
@missmokkori5558
Жыл бұрын
This is the video we needed ! Thank you for helping so many of us out there ! There aren’t many youtubers to whom we can relate and you’re definitely one that we can rely on and who gives genuine advice. Keep up the great work ❤❤❤
@vaishnavivemula7107
Жыл бұрын
alright first of congratulations for hitting 100k! i wanted to actually comment abt the part where she was talking ab the family member situation at 14:42 THAT IS LITERALLY SO TRUE. i recently had a talk with a very close friend of mine after i confessed something to him that was problematic to me and i had the same thought, either i can it say it rn to him and get it off my chest and deal w the diff convo, or i could've chose delaying it but i didn't. i dealt with the discomfort to avoid the anxiety later, in short im telling y'all that it truly is a very good tip
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
❤️❤️❤️❤️
@azuer
Жыл бұрын
My adhd self loves how fast you talk I appreciate that about your videos!
@asthinax
Жыл бұрын
yall have no idea how much I needed this 😭😭
@xodivya
Жыл бұрын
Same here 😭
@JosieBethStudios
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for this, I am trying to become successful at a young age and your videos help me :) Others try to control us but we are not supposed to give in to it and stay strong in control of ourselves and reach our goals despite the controlling people who try to bring us down and interfere! You got this :)
@madisonmieux
7 ай бұрын
Healthy boundaries are vital to us THRIVING, enforcing them is the hard part 😂 but once you do both I swear you become a powerhouse
@222-dash
Жыл бұрын
This video was all I needed for this specific topic. She literally talked about everything I need to know about boundaries and the root of where my people pleasing method came from. Thank you tam kaur, this video helped a lot
@AmBeauty28
Жыл бұрын
I’m so grateful to have found your channel! You speak with passion, compassion, love, authority, ownership & wisdom! Your heart and support to speak to this issue for girls & women alike is so inspiring! You’re a bright, shining light in this world! ❤️👑✨👏🙏
@andily565
Жыл бұрын
Great advice and I agree %100 on everything tysm but I have to say sometimes it not easy to just remove someone from your life in some situations you can't. For example if a certain friend in your friend group disrespect you constantly but is still apart of the friend group. Another example would be someone at work who you see everyday whether you want to or not.
@ayumisae6864
Жыл бұрын
Agree and work situations are usually the toughest as you can’t always avoid the person
@alexandria._.s
10 ай бұрын
i cannot even TELL you how much your advice helps me!!!! i am the oldest daughter and suffer with lack of confidence and your videos literally have been curating the FEMENINE BOSSversion of me i needed!!! ❤❤❤❤ love u
@SmaShleeStar
5 ай бұрын
I only had to watch 24 seconds and I know you’re right. Been working on this for a while. Still don’t have the hang of it. Honest.
@Cadesbaee
Жыл бұрын
YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH I, AND SO SO SO MANY OTHER PPL NEEDED THIS TYSM
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
I GOT YOU❤️
@documenteur.
Жыл бұрын
can you please make a video about dealing bad days(feeling lonely or just normal negative stuff)?because i always wondered how i handle these days without reaching out to toxic people… luv your vibe and content❤❤
@xTenshiAi
Жыл бұрын
She has lots of videos about that already (its about gaining self-respect and self-worth)
@bitterbuttercup
Жыл бұрын
i literally needed this. seriously i had just gotten off the call with my friend who asked for the print i had designed so she can make a bag i had made for my exams. she like literally wants to copy my work. and i had said yes. because it was a reflex....and was feeling so bad til i saw this video. now i am going to message her that its not proper of her to ask me this and i cant help her....
@ananyatyagi9106
3 ай бұрын
if i ll become a better person...then the 60% credit goes to you Tam ...you are just amazing....i have been dealing with heartbreak , failure nd insecurity , jealousy these days....and you are really helping me to get out of it...Thanks a lot..i ll always love you and cherish you forever♥
@yathawuthmon6124
Жыл бұрын
In these day I feel kinda guilt about setting boundaries because no one around me do the things like a real boundary . I'm glad to watch your video , I celebrate myself for the result right now.
@Imtoobusyslayingrn111
Жыл бұрын
I just realized, nowadays everyone's apologizing to me whenever they wrong me lol. Back then it would be me apologizing even if I wrong them. I'm now walking outside without even noticing there's people around me
@giovannapaes9713
4 ай бұрын
as someone who has been a people pleaser my whole life, I really needed this
@amanit.3122
Жыл бұрын
Thank you very much for this comprehensive video with STEPS on how to actually stop people pleasing. I really enjoyed and will be trying these things out. Also, I love your channel !❤❤❤
@shakoorah1
Жыл бұрын
Great one Tam … I feel the passion in your voice 😂very well put together & congratulations on 100k achievement your helpful videos are the reflection of your wisdom and I’m happy to have found your channel xx❤
@rubekisser
Жыл бұрын
I just want to say thank you because this helped me a lot by realizing I was a people pleaser! I’m currently working on this with a “friend” and I’m not scared to say no now ^^!! THANK YOU ALSO NEW SUB!!!
@Vl27203
Жыл бұрын
Beside her kindess sharing these affirmations, i am gonna compliment her lovely accent ♥️
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
So nice of you🥺🧡
@daniellem.gibson4658
Жыл бұрын
Girl I need this! I have a hard time telling people straight up, be that men, friends, even guys picking up on me that are downright creepy!
@Directioner13_
Жыл бұрын
thank youu so much tam it's like you can read my mind or something just 2 days ago i really needed help for setting boundaries with people and now you blessed me with this video💙
@smrutisanjeebani
11 ай бұрын
All my life I have been a people pleaser and seeing this video surely makes me now, to prioritise myself over anyone! Thank you so much for this video! 🥺❤️
@surbhidhawan9843
Жыл бұрын
I just found your channel and girl these videos are the best!! As someone who is trying the not be a people pleaser, this video helped so much!
@dhananjaychoubey1772
Жыл бұрын
Hi. Where are you from ☺?
@tiyasahowlader5026
8 ай бұрын
You opened my eyes!!! i am just 16 but this video gave me the confidence to confront and be a better person ❤ tysm 💌
@princesslacson6291
Жыл бұрын
I'm grateful for the value you freely give to the world. May God bless you more.
@ekwevugbeogheneruemu6006
Жыл бұрын
Thanks for this video, I also have issues creating boundaries with my aunts because they usually play a big role in my actions and now it’s hard to tell them off and make them see the importance of my own decisions
@unicornzrreal1985
Жыл бұрын
"In that case, buh-bye." Love it! Yes queen! Ain't nobody got time for that! 💯
@freshmint34xx32
5 ай бұрын
I really am hoping and I believe one day I will master my boundaries💗 Another really biiiig part is self compassion, because even though I may say something wrong or things turned out badly.. I was doing my very best and thats enough.😭😭 This topic is soo hard for me omg thank you for the video❤
@LorraineVirginie
8 ай бұрын
I’ve watched this video multiple times Tam. It’s one of my favorites from you. Thank you so much.
@DaffadilSunshines
2 ай бұрын
Tam Kaur tysm! I was going through a slump and I'm learning so much r n to get out of this. You have helped me so much this year because I have successfully been able to heal and forgive myself from my past hurt
@saraa7117
Жыл бұрын
This is the first video which is so clear on boundaries that blew up my mind. My issues is my friend slams my car door every-time she gets in or out. And the other is when a costumer throws money at me like I am his/ her dog. I get so angry when happens that I can’t stop it from showing in my behaviour and facial expression.
@katerinasofie6879
Жыл бұрын
This is so so important!! Thank you for talking about boundaries!! As a recovering people pleaser, the journey isn't easy but it's absolutely worth it !
@just_depie
Жыл бұрын
Girl you are the bestie everybody needs ❤
@healthwhatelse6294
Жыл бұрын
A. Do the dishes half-half. B.Do the dishes later on C.Hire someone to do other obligations in your home to be able to rest and do the more important things for yourself. Assertive communication is key and wanting to understand each other is key. With a person who doesnt want to understand you nor respecting your boundories you will never be able to find solutions that is a win-win.
@reshmakhan2385
4 ай бұрын
Tamanna Kaur you’re literally the big sister I always needed. I’m so proud of how far you’ve come, I pray to God you get to fulfil all of your goals.
@gladysopare4711
2 ай бұрын
I love it when she said "bye bye".Thats it girl ❤.No more tolerating nonsense from others
@drsakshijoshi
11 ай бұрын
Really thankful for this. I've always struggled with boundaries, and I really for a long time couldn't wrap my head around them
@Aekii0001
Жыл бұрын
I definitely needed this. Thank you so much! I never knew until now how much I let people walk all over me, though I still find it scary to actually communicate with people and tell them what I find uncomfortable, I'll see this as my next step to my growth. Thank you
@matcha6320
Жыл бұрын
I feel so much happier after watching this video, thank you Tam Kaur I learned a lot from you you’re amazing💘
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
Glad it was helpful! Xxx
@fatimadisilvio816
Жыл бұрын
ThankYou very much Tam, literally I have been struggling with this my WHOLE LIFE, and you're video has helped me so so so soooooooo much, I now have friends that support me, just for being me, you have changed my life, thankyou very much, ly❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@stefg7611
Жыл бұрын
YOU GO GIRL.... I APPRECIATE THE ROLE PLAY. IVE BEEN SEARCHING FOR THIS CONTENT!! THANK YOU
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
Welcome!!
@roumaissaebouaid8042
Жыл бұрын
Yeah finally someone is talking about this. From the day I started watching vids like this to elevate my personality and stuff all I can see is how to deal with guys and how to set boundaries in relationships but nobody actually talks about friendships where I think we must be at least as selective as when we choose partners.
@TysonMichael77
Жыл бұрын
this was magical and life changing. I am for sure going to leave this video with a whole new perspective and way of living life now.
@queenland2882
3 ай бұрын
After watching this, i have realize that how far i have come and healed There are still so much things to learn but im proud of who iam today Honestly being people pleaser is the worst thing in life
@mcfrog5473
Жыл бұрын
Something else that really helps me with guilt around specifically denying other people’s requests, is to offer them an alternative. For example: “I really need some rest right now. Is there anybody else you could ask to help you?” or “I’m not comfortable doing X, but I could do Y” or “I’m not up for doing that tomorrow, but we could pick a different time.” Of course you absolutely do not owe them this alternative, but for me it helps me to take care of my own needs while also showing that I care about the other person’s needs
@lethokuhlemsimang2208
Жыл бұрын
no one ever talks about this as it pertains to work, where there is a legitimate power imbalance involved and a consequence to setting ones boundaries.
@aria8463
Жыл бұрын
you have no idea how perfect your timing was for me
@natachabrandl6257
5 ай бұрын
3:40 I NEEDED to hear this! Growing up with emotionally abusive relatives, I was always on my toes trying to guess what everyone wants or needs. If I didn't "guess", I would be reprehended and these days it still affects me. I have all those people pleasing signs, and I need to grow out of it, being a 31-year old woman. It's so ingrained in me, but this video will help me for sure. Thank you!
@nefdolly
Жыл бұрын
How do you stay unbothered if people spread rumors about you and exposes private info about you? And what if you get physically assaulted for setting boundaries?
@ayesheseal
Жыл бұрын
I have seen many youtuber cropping up nowdays but hardly people likes to talk about all this things which l feel very important to discuss because there are ppl who aren't vocal their emotions to the ppl around them, they badly needs the femine like you who will talk about their insecurities somehow they could relate and connect with you. U are just phenomenal in one word. Grow well. Lots of love from Kolkata.
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
Ah thank you!!!
@BTSALWAYS075
Жыл бұрын
Wtf this video is sooo underrated!!! I really needed this video and many more do!! I love you tam for this.. I will surely be an amazing person (i already am but will be even better) and you will be a part of this journey. Lots of love to you bae 💓
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
🥰🥰🥰🥰
@aashi_1657
Жыл бұрын
Okay so I'm curious about one thing: If we both have our own boundaries that are being crossed by each other, how do we deal with this issue? example- person 1: hey can you please wash the dishes this time? i do it all the time which makes it really difficult for me to make time for other tasks. you're crossing my boundaries by disrespecting my time person 2: actually i have fully committed myself to make time for myself this time around because i'm burnt out by work all the time. hence can you please respect my boundary of prioritising myself?
@xnm2754
Жыл бұрын
Thats such a good question, I even think this as everyone has a different way of setting boundaries and different ways of doing things too..I struggle to find the balance and how to make sure mine and the other persons are not disrespected
@nandaniiivyas
Жыл бұрын
I think in that case you just do your dishes and they do theirs
@nightowl8629
Жыл бұрын
Abby Choi who failed to do so, may her soul rest in peace
@happypp212
Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for the tips of writing down what I like and not! I just made baby steps of saying no and cut off two friends that have been rude to me. Its feeling better and I have more energy to do something for myself. ❤ Im working on boundaries with my mom rn.
@dalvi7771
Жыл бұрын
you are just like elder sister guiding me!! thank you for this
@tamkaur
Жыл бұрын
Love that!🥹❤️
@lucyqueen2421
Жыл бұрын
Tam i really want to give u a really really really big hug!!!!!!!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰😍😍😍🤩🤩🤩
@jamien.5528
Жыл бұрын
You are so underrated and this video deserves so many more views! Everyone should see this, especially people who grew up in dysfunctional households like I did. It’s crazy how foreign the concept of boundaries feel to me because the people I was surrounded with growing up never had them. Those examples actually helped loads. Thank you so much for everything you do Tam, you have helped me out so much and I’m sure SO many others!!
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