1. Good men will die in war 2. Doc can't save them all 3. DOC WILL GO THROUGH HELL TO BREAK RULES 1 AND 2.
@zac5370
2 жыл бұрын
And then Death decided to take Doc...
@genghiskhan6809
2 жыл бұрын
This.
@dinodude6992
2 жыл бұрын
@@zac5370 And that was when death met O'Malley
@thelittlestmig3394
2 жыл бұрын
@@zac5370 I would like to refer to Fat Electrician's video about Medics and why it is extremely bad idea to go for the Doc. Nobody touches the Doc.
@chowrites6179
2 жыл бұрын
First heard this when I was in the AF and I can safely say it is heartbreaking to see it in action. My younger brother is a combat medic in the army; I often wonder if he's had this experience yet.
@priximus2254
2 жыл бұрын
Human medics are scary but nothing is as scary as a squad of soldiers going after the one who messed with their medic
@tylerthomason9461
2 жыл бұрын
No one fucks with doc!
@MsMacintosh
2 жыл бұрын
Nobody kills doctor.
@gasmaskman1354
2 жыл бұрын
Yup at go's from armored troops to armored wave 100 cod:waw nazi zombies
@Allantitan
2 жыл бұрын
@@MsMacintosh *someone kills the doc* Every human within 500 light years: *brings out every weapon they were NOT allowed to use out of mercy*
@MsMacintosh
2 жыл бұрын
@@Allantitan Geneva conventions? You mean, Geneva fun stuff list?
@GTalon5
2 жыл бұрын
Medic pointing a finger at the grim reaper. "Back off. This one's mine!" Reaper steps back. "Yes Sir."
@ryantomer4126
2 жыл бұрын
*proceeds to surgically attach persons souls to his then revive them*
@hauntedmedic373
2 жыл бұрын
@@ryantomer4126 like medic did from tf2. Well he attached several souls to himself, but that's besides the point.
@ryantomer4126
2 жыл бұрын
@@hauntedmedic373 vat do you mean like? In right here!
Why do I feel like that’s what some top brass doc in the military would say at a graduation speech?
@SiegeTF
2 жыл бұрын
Birds, cats, dogs, bears, wombats... I collected a roomba's soul last week. What's a roomba? Your psyche won't be able to handle the answer until you understand Humans better...
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
I should have added the Roomba.
@SiegeTF
2 жыл бұрын
Jumping Jimney Cricket, its the author! I'm honored. I made the comment because of a post in an image board that shall remain anonymous; OP had posted that, during an electrical storm their Roomba had activated, and started spinning in circles. OP sat it in their lap and was stroking it to calm it down for several minutes before they realized what they were doing. Humans really will pack bond with anything.
@chevtothemax
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 it would have been hilarious. But not every hfy short needs a reference to stabby
@Bluesonofman
2 жыл бұрын
@@chevtothemax Who created stabby?
@chevtothemax
2 жыл бұрын
@@Bluesonofman i dont recall the author. But i believe it originates from one of those, humans will pack bond with anything posts.
@James-ep2bx
2 жыл бұрын
The thing with human medics; they're not just reducing their sides casualties, they're fighting a war on another front, against death
@Nyghtking
2 жыл бұрын
it's also not uncommon for a human medic to try and treat and opposing forces soldiers.
@James-ep2bx
2 жыл бұрын
@@Nyghtking the foe death doesn't take sides so why should they
@spaghettilord4892
2 жыл бұрын
Yes
@augustusvillanueva2008
2 жыл бұрын
@@James-ep2bx agreed
@sgtsaltstick2729
2 жыл бұрын
@@James-ep2bx Prisoners of war can make incredibly valueable assets. Like information. Best case scenario, one could convince them to spy. Worst case scenario, they'll just be a humanitarian display. Most realistic expectation is to have the interrogator prod until the POW slips and spills details. One could move them and have them either serve their sentence through labor (How americans do it) or just keep them alive, release them after a certain time has passed. I might be wrong though.
@Zakvadr1995
2 жыл бұрын
“Please just let me die! I fought well! My ancestors will-“ (SLAP) Medic: *”YOU DON’T HAVE MY PERMISSION TO DIE! SO YOU’RE NOT GONNA DIE! NOT HERE AND NOT LIKE THIS!“* Death: “Yeah, sorry bud… he has more power than I do here.”
@orionstickguard790
2 жыл бұрын
I can just see Death sitting on a lawn chair casually reading the paper when says your reply.
@charlieyes4946
2 жыл бұрын
Freaking drill sergeant
@memes_the_dna_of_the_soul5487
2 жыл бұрын
@@charlieyes4946 No its just the Commisar. "I have not given you leave to die Gaurdsman!"
@charlieyes4946
2 жыл бұрын
@@memes_the_dna_of_the_soul5487 _me me me me I’m memes_the_DNA_of_the_soul coniseir…_ shut biss! Conisair got nothing in the drill sargeant!
@inquisitorwalmarius6650
2 жыл бұрын
@@charlieyes4946 the inquisition begs to differ, The Commissariat are an most important pillar of justice and morale in the Imperial Guard, and the feared executors of those who dare to step wrongly.
@SmolTerribleTornado
2 жыл бұрын
Human doc: "This is a war against death, soldier: Death is merciless. Took my puppy, it took my favorite movie stars, but most importantly it made my son cry when it took his gold fish. I'm not allowing that fucker to take another life ever again". Alien merc: "HIS ENTIRE EXOSKELETON WAS RIPPED OFF AND YOU HAD SPENT AN ENTIRE DAY GRAFTING WHO KNOWS WHAT TO KEEP HIM TOGETHER!!! EVEN YOUR PEOPLE SAID IT WAS INHUMAN TO KEEP HIM IN SUCH STATE!!!" Alien crab guy: *[muffled crab screams]* Human doc: "I'm in a war against death, friend... And I am *winning* "
@gasmaskman1354
Жыл бұрын
death: crying in the coner.
@Volvith
Жыл бұрын
Death: *[traumatised PTSD flashbacks to every failed attempt to take a human soul]* _"It's not right... This isn't how it's supposed to go... I don't get it, what is this..."_
@SmolTerribleTornado
Жыл бұрын
@@PodreyJenkin138 put in some franken fran, add a bit of death note and add aliens with health problems a la monster girl doctor
@SmolTerribleTornado
Жыл бұрын
@Mintleaf HEY!!!... I love that game
@bogustoast22none25
2 жыл бұрын
Death: I’m here for… Jenkins? Medic: Too early. Death: I’m pretty su- Medic: wanna bet a paycheck? *slaps Jenkins* Jenkins: I’m up. Death: … Medic: … Go on, find somewhere else to be. *At the Therapist* Death: I just feel so… Like I got places to be and people to take, it’s a hectic job. I feel like they don’t appreciate my time.
@rodrigoandorinha9259
7 ай бұрын
We appreciate , when the times comes , if you go too early you get punched in the face
@involuntaryanalysis
2 жыл бұрын
Death: animals don't have souls. Humans: They do now. Death: How the actual fuck did you do that? Humans: Fuck you, that how, now bring me my cat.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Pretty much.
@alexforest4190
Жыл бұрын
Ahahahhahahahaha
@Will-mk5pj
Жыл бұрын
Straight up. When I die and there is an afterlife for souls, if I don’t see my cat, Yoda, and my dog, Loki… if hell didn’t exist, it would when I was done with the afterlife.
@Iluvantir
Жыл бұрын
@@Will-mk5pj We get the Western understanding of the word "soul" from Hebrew (obvious, when you think about our Judeo-Christian heritage). The word is Nephesh, and it means the following: living being, life, creature, mind, desires, heart, appetite, persons. Any one or all of these. A cat, a dog, anything that lives and breathes, has a "soul". And we have another promise: "Eye has not seen, nor has ear heard, nor has it entered the hearts of men those things that God has in store for them that love Him." I'm expecting to see all my fur buddies lined up and waiting for me once it's my turn to take that one-way trip. I'm going to get swamped in purrs, woofs, and many snuggles, I know it. Then demands for walkies. That part... I'm not so looking forward to... I've had a LOT of dogs!
@Gr3nadgr3gory
10 ай бұрын
This is why reincarnation ended up being a thing in this world. They had to get the souls from somewhere.
@Ghostly_One1
2 жыл бұрын
I feel like paraphrasing a Sangheili line would apply to humans in a HFY scenario pretty good. "There is no honor in dying in a tent, human. My kind must fall in battle!" "There is no battlefield harsher than a medic tent" "Are you mad? You know nothing of combat!" "You fool, when I draw my weapons it is for combat with death herself. I defend you with knife and needle."
@Heegaherger
2 жыл бұрын
That is powerful.
@theuberninja262
Жыл бұрын
"Now hold still, and try not to scream too loud."
@kidkong_1488
Жыл бұрын
Just curious, what's the original quote?
@Ghostly_One1
Жыл бұрын
@@kidkong_1488 largely same, just without the human mention since its between 2 elites
@Jesus_Offical
Жыл бұрын
I cant cause harm i can cause as much pain as i like
@igigor646
2 жыл бұрын
-So you know how after life work right? -Well yeah why? -*They don't care*
@Deconstruction_Administrator
2 жыл бұрын
The difference between a Doctor, a Medic and a Retrievalist. A Doctor's job is to heal people and keep them from dying. A Medic's job is to help soldiers to be more comfortable... while they die. A Retrievalist's job is to run headlong into Hell, grab the injured and get them back out of danger so that Death itself will only take Soldiers while they kick and scream and claw their way back to fighting condition.
@eleethtahgra7182
2 жыл бұрын
Nah, medic job is either ease the pain for those dying or patch them up juuust enough so that they could be sent back to the doctors.
@Jiffedup
2 жыл бұрын
1. Good men will die i war 2. Doc can't save them all 3. DOC WILL GO THROUGH HELL TO BREAK RULES 1 AND 2.
@pedronobre9833
2 жыл бұрын
... You wouldnt have taken the medic part from RvB, would've you
@dm_katy2263
2 жыл бұрын
This one made me giggle
@Deconstruction_Administrator
2 жыл бұрын
@@pedronobre9833 I heard the joke before I ever knew of RvB.
@UnknownOps
2 жыл бұрын
Other Medics: - "No, please don't hurt me, I'm a medic! you can't harm medics on the battlefield." - "Hold on tight, we will win this one, I know it!" Human Medics: - "I'm medically trained and that means I know all of the ways I can mess with your fucking day." - "Don't you dare fucking run from this objective, We will feeding the morgue full of these scumbags!"
@pelinalwhitestrake3367
Жыл бұрын
"The healing is not as rewarding as the hurting"
@MTF.TAU5..Bob.
Жыл бұрын
Five days later *in the morgue* _why the hell are bags and bags of stinking objects in my front yard?!_
@xxsemxx02
2 жыл бұрын
"the animals dont have souls" a sentence which startet humanitys war against the grimm reapers. Cat and dog owners aligned to make deaths life a litteral hell 😂
@t.j.7347
2 жыл бұрын
I SHALL HAVE MY PACK OF LOVING DOGS!!!
@MangaMan108
2 жыл бұрын
Cat and dog owners were the first of the infantry, zookeeper special forces are on their way, and the calvary is being deployed.
@theenderdestruction2362
2 жыл бұрын
Besides our own he just laughs
@geoshark12
2 жыл бұрын
Probably steve erwins doing since he loved all animals
@SSGTWinters
2 жыл бұрын
@@geoshark12 Steve Erwins is like rambo....
@ZackeTheBrute
2 жыл бұрын
Permission to die denied private! You are ordered to stop bleeding and then report to the field hospital.
@HimitsuYami
2 жыл бұрын
Sir, yes Sir!
@shayminthedoctor9663
2 жыл бұрын
Blood is sucked back into their body out of fear
@MTF.TAU5..Bob.
Жыл бұрын
Death in the corner: WHAT THE HELL this is not how its supposed to go
@someperson3941
Жыл бұрын
Their legs regrow temporarily and he walks towards the field hospital
@kotypetersen9282
27 күн бұрын
But sir, I have no arms, half a leg, one ear and half an eye sir!!! Permission to be launched from a catapult
@firedirewolf
2 жыл бұрын
Men In Black one said it well, "most aliens consider emotions a disease and that humans are infected with it, doesn't that make you feel special?" We are so emotionally attached that even death thinks us crazy and decided to go get Mr Whiskers to not fight the shear emotional trauma humans have when they feel attached to something
@Scorpius1122
2 жыл бұрын
The first story was a little anti-climactic, but the second one put a bow on it.
@admiralglenn2323
2 жыл бұрын
A good punchline you could say.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@stm7810
2 жыл бұрын
@@admiralglenn2323 Ba dum tss
@zyanidwarfare5634
2 жыл бұрын
Death is a smiling face to guide the dead to their next destination. However he does not smile by choice, it is simply the only feature apparent on his skeletal face.
@TRAILLER
2 жыл бұрын
Death is the ultimate service industry employe. Always greet you with a smile. And while yes there are those that get ready to go before, there are dead that have to get through all the stages of grief in front of the reaper after the fact, the number of people entitled to living is staggering. So Death deal with about 56KPM (Karen per/minute) on the 6690 death an hour.
@lonelypancake5979
2 жыл бұрын
No one fears death, they fear what comes after. If the reaper really is a guide then I’d be a lot less scared.
@puffincz3482
2 жыл бұрын
sans
@Biodeamon
2 жыл бұрын
naw its a coward and is smiling because its nervous
@TRAILLER
2 жыл бұрын
@@Biodeamon EVERY time? After all this time doing the job? #SocialAnxiety Nah he's just like a veteran company gondola driver who has a 80% Karen clientele. He knows you accommodate the client or get walloped.
@GenGBby
2 жыл бұрын
Turns out nothing was ever stopping them from leaving huh? Well, that makes the job of being a spiteful ghost easier.
@koathekid8255
2 жыл бұрын
ALIENS:easier? Not possible HUMANS:I meant what I said
@sayospecter6731
2 жыл бұрын
Well, that explains the absurd amount of vengeful spirit stories in the world's folklores, despite basically each of them having an obligatory death figure(s)
@Volvith
Жыл бұрын
Human Soul: "I'M ANGRY." Ghost Hunter: "I'll help you achieve your goals, don't be angry, i can help you find peac--" Human Soul: "I don't want peace, I WANT. *TO BE ANGRY."*
@jgkitarel
8 ай бұрын
@@Volvith Ghost Hunter: "Janice, bring out the brownies with the special ingredient that is like weed for spirits. This one needs to get baked before we can get him to properly move on."
@noneofyourbuisness1679
2 жыл бұрын
Leave it to humanity to say “fuck that bullshit” to how the rules of death work
@worldcomicsreview354
Жыл бұрын
Congratualations on being selected for diplomatic service at the Atraxii embassy on Earth. Here is rule 1 for dealing with humans: Never tell their scientists or engineers they "cant".
@warlynx5644
6 ай бұрын
@@worldcomicsreview354They do not see it as an absolute rule, they see it as a challenge to be overcome
@TeutonicKnight92
2 жыл бұрын
Doc: I’m a medic not a doctor Church: what’s the difference? Doc: a doctor saves lives, a medic just make you comfortable while you die.
@MsMacintosh
2 жыл бұрын
"A doctor saves you. A medic will just sit with you until you die. I'm a medic." *loads combat shotgun*
@ellencameron3775
Жыл бұрын
Caboose: That's not a target, that's Church!
@Nempo13
11 ай бұрын
Absolutely hate people that use that 'quote' because medics dos o much more. They absolutely will do anything to keep those in their care from dying. If they KNOW they cannot save you, you are a dead man walking. They let you know, and if you ask for it, they will patch you up well enough and give you the painkillers necessary so you can pick your gun back up and die fighting beside your brothers.
@dulizardglasses3170
2 жыл бұрын
**Reaper starts walking towards an almost dead human** Medic: YOU STAY THE FUCK BACK
@chrisdufresne9359
2 жыл бұрын
Wasn't there an old saying regarding combat medics? Something akin to not messing with (human) doc? I can only imagine how much ammo was thrown down range at the first xeno bastard who shot Doc. Humans embrace death as an old friend. He is also our oldest enemy. To learn that our Death actually enjoys his job is slightly disturbing in a sense. But it does make sense that he would enjoy the challenge regarding humanity.
@zyanidwarfare5634
2 жыл бұрын
The medics may not always hold a gun, but rather they hold a syringe and gauze, however they still fight in a war of their own. The war against death itself
@epsome13
2 жыл бұрын
That would be the fat electrician in his episode doc
@anathardayaldar
2 жыл бұрын
I think the unspoken agreement was "Don't shoot at our medics and we won't shoot at yours." Which may fall apart if the other side doesn't have medics.
@RomanvonUngernSternbergnrmfvus
2 жыл бұрын
If you shoot at human medics you get to start hearing the humans shooting at you sing “napalm sticks to kids” . . .
@Sjackson2369
2 жыл бұрын
As it goes, do not frick with doc.
@jacobs.9696
2 жыл бұрын
I like the human death's sense of humor. Morbid. But makes sense.
@RadicalKattastrophe
2 жыл бұрын
Morbid.... i mean, It's death....
@slaughterinthespotlight1669
2 жыл бұрын
Oh yeah its morbid time🧛♂️🦇
@user-iw6bu4iq4r
Жыл бұрын
@@RadicalKattastrophe A HUMAN death.
@rodrigoandorinha9259
7 ай бұрын
I think that one spend too much time with the humans and it just stick with him
@bombomos
2 жыл бұрын
"If a human loves it, it will have a soul." Fucking hell that hits hard.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Yeah...
@lyrigageforge3259
10 ай бұрын
Well in that case all the stuffed toys kids have got one too. Nah, that story actually presented two ways for 'animals' to get a soul, weather one wishes to notice it or not - either cause of love or because of that other religion with the reincarnation thing.
@goldengryphon
6 ай бұрын
@@lyrigageforge3259 The Velveteen Rabbit, a kid's book, covered that very topic a very long time ago.
@Gilhelmi
2 жыл бұрын
I like the thought that Deaths from other worlds didn't know that nothing stops a soul from leaving the afterlife. That if we don't find our pets, we would just leave to go get them and that causes more problems, so now Death holds on to our pets for us. I like the thought that humanity is not the strongest, most powerful, or super intelligent. No, we are just the Craziest of all.
@Fourtytwo4242
2 жыл бұрын
Death: "welcome, to after life, here you find peace, happiness an-" Human: "this is boring I am going go back and to become a bird." Death: "wha- what you mean go ba-" Human: "I.AM.GOING.BACK.TO.BECOME.A.BIRD" death: "yo-you can't d-" *Human turns around and walks away* "HEY stop you get back here mr" Human: "no, I am a bird, you can't tell me what to do!!" *get ready to jump back to earth* Death: "Listen here I am your Death and you do has I sa-" *Human jumps back to earth* "NOOO...damn it" Death 2: "ooo did you get a reincarnater hey, good luck finding him out of the 7 billion birds" Death: *sighs*
@kaduVIII
2 жыл бұрын
@@Fourtytwo4242 AND PASS THE REST OF MY DAYS SINGING: A BI BI BI BI BIRD BIRD IS THE WORD.........
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Pretty much.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
@@Fourtytwo4242 I like this
@prestonjones1653
Жыл бұрын
Florida Man, Florida Man, Hit in the head with a frying pan, Lives his life in a garbage can, Florida Man.
@levantdiggerus3473
Жыл бұрын
Death: Attempts retrieval Medic: *These hands rated E For Everyone*
@lazartestigus2414
2 жыл бұрын
"Gotta reincarnate some hindu guy into a tiger" Fucking hell that made me laugh loud enough the chick in the car next to me looked at me funny
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Ah good. My story had the intended effect!
@Merilirem
2 жыл бұрын
Yeah that was great. Scrolled down the comments hoping to find someone else who shared my opinion.
@worldcomicsreview354
Жыл бұрын
Karma-wise, is that a downgrade or an upgrade?
@randlebrowne2048
Жыл бұрын
@@worldcomicsreview354 Probably a downgrade, given the Hindu insistence on not eating meat.
@lyrigageforge3259
10 ай бұрын
Yea well that particular sentence also has one asking - exactly how those animals would get a soul?
@tonyrodriguez4233
2 жыл бұрын
The second story had me in tears. A spiteful angry human looking for his/her cat.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
I'm glad you cried. Thank you.
@jonahingram3496
2 жыл бұрын
The doom slayer when he doesn't find his pet rabbit in heaven IM GOING BACK HOLD ON DIASY
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
@@jonahingram3496 That's a pretty solid story for the next DOOM game.
@MsMacintosh
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 oh my god... you're a genius. Write that down somewhere, so you can say you called it.
@colson3050
2 жыл бұрын
bro it straight broke me. Im crying like a little bitch
@Cha-Khia
2 жыл бұрын
And the only thing scary than "Doc", is what happens when the enemy FUCKS with Doc. You do not mess with Doc.
@johnneisser9963
2 жыл бұрын
quickest way to to get a U.S. Marine unit upset (ie. quickest death) is to shoot at a corpsman (U.S. Navy medics attached to every Marine unit. Even people in the U.S. Navy are NOT allowed to mess with Corpsman.
@Gilhelmi
2 жыл бұрын
May God have mercy on the Enemy who attacks the Doc. Because I sure as well won't.
@maximsavage
2 жыл бұрын
The Xenos do not understand. Human medics *do* have compassion... It is precisely because of their great compassion for their brothers in arms that they will so desperately do anything and everything in their power to preserve the lives of the wounded. It is because of their compassion that they will run onto a battlefield to retrieve wounded men, that they will yell at the dying warrior to keep him awake as they treat him, that they will put their own lives at risk, so that others may live. A combination of compassion, courage, selflessness and a sense of duty are required to make a good medic.
@scout360pyroz
2 жыл бұрын
Compassion goes out the window when private nimrod forgets to drink water AGAIN and comes to bother you. One guy got so tired of it he started giving enemas to everyone that came to him suffering from dehydration, and openly warned everyone of their fate should they neglect their hydration.
@peterwall8191
2 жыл бұрын
It is a long and almost hallowed tradition of combat medics that they treat everyone, regardless of side. Sadly, some fanatics have a problem with that. Hilarious! Human death pranking alien death! Welp, now we know we get our twisted sense of humour from daddy.
@fleurgymcheurgy9267
2 жыл бұрын
daddy, huh? fits well enough, to be sure.
@worldcomicsreview354
Жыл бұрын
Japanese soldier on Hacksaw ridge: I'm going to join my ances- "F**K YOU! YOU'RE GOING BACK TO YOUR WIFE AND KIDS"
@Sorain1
Жыл бұрын
I love that the Human Death is trying to help... in that way humans tend to do, at your expense.
@Hungover_oposum
2 жыл бұрын
I'm a combat Medic and I love the hell out of these story's.
@AgroSquerril
2 жыл бұрын
:)
@Heegaherger
2 жыл бұрын
Semper Fi O7
@boombang0418
Жыл бұрын
Dude, I myself am wanting to be a combat medic. Just waiting on those ASVAB scores to come back...
@gregoryfrechou
Жыл бұрын
and your marines love you
@Hungover_oposum
Жыл бұрын
@Gregory Frechou I'm Army but any Joe is my Joe if they ask
@jesseamaya4413
2 жыл бұрын
The end of the second story, now come on, we have to reincarnate some Hindu guy into a tiger,, wait, reincarnate, what? Humans, the intergalactic, interdimentional disturbing dark hilarious sitcom of a species.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
I felt like we would just be so off the rails that it's easier for Death to adapt to us, than us to Death.
@robertstoneking7916
2 жыл бұрын
That one had me rolling.
@RealengoPrimordialDemon
2 жыл бұрын
The last story was both bittersweet and funny. Good job to the author.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@RealengoPrimordialDemon
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 really hope you're right and my babies are waiting for me at the other side.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
@@RealengoPrimordialDemon same
@demonoftheweb
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 thank you for the wonderful story and I dislike you for the emotional gut punch though I miss all my fur siblings and hope to see them then.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
@@demonoftheweb You are welcome and I feel the same way.
@wyvernharries4788
2 жыл бұрын
"I deny your request. Now take these painkillers and allow me to treat you-you insufferable git"
@ephemispriest8069
6 ай бұрын
More ibuprofen.
@geoshark12
2 жыл бұрын
They don’t seem to know of the Hippocratic oath , or that fact that them trying to save even the hopeless is there way of showing compassion
@jlokison
2 жыл бұрын
For military medical professionals the hippocratic oath becomes conditional. They will try to save everyone, not matter the uniform or lack there of. However, if you threaten those in their care, or indirectly threaten them by threatening medical personnel, they will do what ever they can to end that threat, even if it means killing someone to save others.
@goldenruhl246
2 жыл бұрын
@@jlokison "Most especially must I tread with care in matters of life and death. If it is given me to save a life, all thanks. But it may also be within my power to take a life;" is in the oath. not conditional. granted the context is medical the application be it knife, medicine or bullet is all the same in the end.
@Elyseon
2 жыл бұрын
"I'm a healer but..."
@bookworm3696
2 жыл бұрын
The rule is do no unnecessary harm in order to save a life. If someone is threatening to kill you or your patient, well getting "creative" with your knowledge would be the correct thing to do.
@Volvith
Жыл бұрын
The idea of Death opting to collect the souls of a Human's beloved pet animals just to keep them staying in the afterlife, because if he doesn't the Human just breaks out of the afterlife out of spite, is ridiculously hilarious. Alien Death: "But... There's no way to leave the afterlife!" Human Death: "Oh, they'll find a way alright, _they always do."_ ... Alien Death: "But animals don't have souls!..." And thus, the souls of all humans past went to war with the Grim Reapers, and knowing humans, they'd probably win.
@gammaspector
2 жыл бұрын
It’s just a scratch you coward, get back in the fight! - a particularly pissed off medic
@laurenkirby97
2 жыл бұрын
"just a flesh wound" the medic says as he sends a quadriplegic soldier back into the battlefield outfitted with cybernetics and a score to settle.
@LiamDerWandrer
2 жыл бұрын
@@laurenkirby97 I see we learned something from the capulans. XD
@masterblasterT47
2 жыл бұрын
I told myself "it's probably a culture clash kind of story" when I saw the first story's title. It seems like I was correct in my assumption.
@markmulder9845
2 жыл бұрын
Medics will go through hell to make sure as many stay alive as possible. On a side note, medics are usually armed... and will use said arms to defend their patients.
@gmailquinn
2 жыл бұрын
One dentist used a machine gun. The other is TF2 medic
@TheKyrix82
2 жыл бұрын
The rules of engagement for medics, as I understand it, is they're not allowed to be shot until they shoot.
@alexmansour100
Жыл бұрын
@@gmailquinn Ben Salomon, he defended his medical tent while he was the acting surgeon against a massive Japanese bonsai charge in WW2 takeoff out scores of attackers but was denied the MoH until the 2000s? Due to a misunderstanding of the rules of war.
@johnchestnut5340
6 ай бұрын
@TheKyrix82 While technically correct, you are under the misunderstanding that medics are quickly and easily identified during battle. You further misunderstand that not all cultures share values. For some, all enemies are legitimate targets including civilians and children...ALL. You sometimes fight on the enemies' terms whether "legal" or not.
@noname-dq9uf
6 ай бұрын
@gmailquinn Ben Solomon, a total badass, who diring the battle of saipan defended his patients from Japanese soldiers who were killing them on their stretchers. So he order a full evacuation which was carried out by the (i believe)nurses. While he took it upon himself to man, I believe either a 1919 browning 30 cal machine gun or the m2 browning 50 cal machine gun. He died protecting his patients, then in 2002 a full 58 f%ckin years because of poltical bs. Some stuff could be missing or out right wrong, I'm just writing from my memory. 😅
@sirkole5517
10 ай бұрын
“But it was fucking hilarious” a disgruntled soldier is exactly what I imagine a human death would be like
@Renegadebane
2 жыл бұрын
Humanities goal: Conquer the entire universe so alien animals get souls.
@hanzzel6086
Жыл бұрын
Sounds good to me. Where do I sign?
@PhoenixT70
2 ай бұрын
I’d join up for that.
@superfly9291
2 жыл бұрын
One thing death got wrong though. We will absolutely bond with animals that threaten our lives XD
@PhoenixT70
2 ай бұрын
Wolves used to be an existential threat to humanity. A few millennia later, we have domestic dogs that love us and consider us their pack. Humanity is jacked at getting animals to love us, and even more jacked at loving animals like they’re people-because they are.
@413draco
2 жыл бұрын
If this was DnD some of the Aliens would be these healer dual class. Paladin Artificers and then their are the humans their healers are. Necromancer and/or Paladin builds that specialized in percussive healing.
@AugustoEL
2 жыл бұрын
Ah so the barbarian casted fist to heal.
@413draco
2 жыл бұрын
@@AugustoEL Barbarian healer: also known as "Did I give you permission to expire?" healers, some times referred to as "I will make you heal and make you regret being injured in the first place" type of healers. they hit you enough times that you die and get factory rested back to life.
@AugustoEL
2 жыл бұрын
@@413draco lol just got a video of barbarians, at the same time of your response, and yes "if you die for what they did to you I will find you, and make you regret that.
@snspartan714al2
2 жыл бұрын
Barbarian uses “Intimidation” to heal… What? You can’t do that Nat 20 … …um your shouting causes the wounds to heal in fear of your rage
@alwaysonyourtail2563
2 жыл бұрын
@@AugustoEL sounds like my assassin that masters healing magic why so he can cut you down and heal you up over and over again till you beg for death. or just give me the info i wanted why drag this out there is only so much blood i can clean off my shirt
@wilemelliott
2 жыл бұрын
First one, Rule number one, Doc can't save everyone Rule number two, Doc will move heaven and earth, kill, fight, and even die trying to break rule number one Had a house mate who was Doc back when he was in... and its the truth. Second story... damn onion cutting ninjas...
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
I had to put my martial arts training to use somehow.
@voidkat4202
2 жыл бұрын
Alien: Medic! Are you sure this will work?! Human Medic: HAHAHAHA I HAVE NO IDEA!!
@preistestdragon4634
5 ай бұрын
also see Alien: medic are you sure this will work? Human Medic: absolutely not, but he is dead either way. Dying Man: revives Human Medic: well ill be damned. Alien: o_o
@Gilhelmi
2 жыл бұрын
I am far too much of a human. That second story was absolutely hilarious. Death warning other Death's about humanity reaching the stars. But decided to have fun with it because he had been so traumatized by trying to reap our souls.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Glad you liked it!
@Nyet-Zdyes
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 I really liked your story about Death/Grim Reapers. Thanks for writing and sharing it.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
@@Nyet-Zdyes You are most welcome!
@Nyet-Zdyes
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 Just out of curiosity... Do you prefer YOURS "stirred, not shaken"?
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
@@Nyet-Zdyes "Does it look like I give a damn?" lol
@Jeranhound
2 жыл бұрын
One scifi series has aliens stumble upon a battle between two different human space empires, and after the battle is over and they pick up survivors, they only have one request for turning over the stranded humans. They require our "Universal Fixing Material." After much arguing and pondering, the main characters deduce that the aliens... are asking for duct tape. When they picked up the escape pods and dug through the wreckage of the ships, they found duct tape being used for everything from jury-rigging computer wiring to taping shut gun shots and spacesuit breaches. An advanced alien species, and they had never thought to stick glue on the back of a strip of cloth, so the humans gladly hand over a whole palette of general-issue duct tape to try and get on their good side.
@bryceaustin4995
2 жыл бұрын
For the Algorithm, and for my dog Shadow. He was a good boy.
@MsDogleaf
6 ай бұрын
Yes my ginger was a girl too
@FormerGovernmentHuman
Жыл бұрын
Doc is always weird. Doc is never normal. But nobody is loved more than Doc. Thanks for saving me doc.
@Gebunator
2 жыл бұрын
Some fine stories to nrrate. I really like the concept of "If something is cared and loved enough, they'll get a soul"
@inquisitorwalmarius6650
2 жыл бұрын
it is old beliefs to be honest. it is said that is how some mythological beings came into existence. especially if you look at more isolated mythos like those from asia. it is also said that those "ghost's" that have been spotted through time have had some kind of attachment to the spot or things. i guess the concept of caring for stuff, gives them meaning thus worth(soul) are as old as our race.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Glad you liked it.
@piratekingthaszar7912
2 жыл бұрын
There's a good reason you never mess with Doc. Mess with Doc and it's about to be warcrime happy hour.
@gmailquinn
2 жыл бұрын
^ Read the other comments about what happens when you shoot a human medic
@xscaliersolid1194
Жыл бұрын
When the Geneva Convention becomes a checklist...
@prestonwattsjr
Жыл бұрын
I mean, shooting a medic is already a war crime, only fair to return the favor.
@ernestmac13
Жыл бұрын
I didn't see combat as I was a Navy Reserve Medic attached to a Marine Reserve by Unit; but I still understand the good we do, via conversations like I had with an older vet in a wheelchair who proudly showed me the very large scars on his thighs and who told me how a doc had saved his legs by stuffing his wounds with bandages. Managed to serve 6 years despite an undiagnosed skull defect and mild scoliosis.
@ConfusedGuardsman
Жыл бұрын
Doc: The only one who can stack and unstack bodies at the same time.
@Darkwintre
Жыл бұрын
Why hasn't there been a movie about this yet? I mean imagine Death turning up and asking them to stop punching them! Or them recruiting help to find the deceased souls of their human's pet only those pets are defending their owner from Death! Then there's the soul of the departed returning from the afterlife to protect their loved one from an eldritch horror except the horror is more scared of them as being dead the horror can't stop them getting back up and attacking again!
@GravitWry
2 жыл бұрын
Medics stare at Death in the eyes and punches him.
@blackknightz5036
Жыл бұрын
Soldiers: *dies* Medic:"YOUR DUTY IS NOT DONE,BROTHERS!!!"
@TheFearsomeRat
Жыл бұрын
EVEN IN DEATH THEY STILL SERVE!
@MarsStarcruiser
2 жыл бұрын
They must see human medics as if they’re necromancers, not letting the dead rest.
@austisticalaskan
2 жыл бұрын
Just listened to this today, it really touched my heart. My Wife's and I's Guinea Pig pasted away this morning.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry to hear that.
@jlokison
2 жыл бұрын
The other scary thing about human medics is what human soldiers will do if you injure their medic. They have little enough restraint as is, they lose all of that if Doc goes down.
@gmailquinn
2 жыл бұрын
Never shoot human: Medics Officers Pets Adopted parents. If you did, well.
@jlokison
2 жыл бұрын
@@gmailquinn It depends on where they were trained and how with the officers. In some cases it will disrupt them and prevent them from acting. However, if they have been trained to a standard similar to most North American troops then killing the officer means they might have lost coordinated leadership, but now their is no one willing to hold them back or call them off when they lash out.
@ismaeljimenez6562
Жыл бұрын
@@jlokison good old default aggression
@charnor2727
Жыл бұрын
@@jlokison"bad news boys! LT is dead! Who's ready to go for a walk through hell?"
@dragon_games1657
Жыл бұрын
yea try kill officer doc. . . taht shit gets out of hand REAL fucking quick.
@maxxor-overworldhero6730
2 жыл бұрын
Human Death: "If you thought that was trouble, you don't want to hear about the guy living in that desert region some couple odd thousand years ago. That guy literally kept robbing us by bringing back people after we already collected their souls." Alien Death: "What?!" Human Death: "And don't get me started on _his_ death. Let alone his death caused a ton more souls to return, but he even came back to life after three days. Honestly still don't know where he went." Alien Death: "..............Huhhhh?!?!?!" 😱
@donaldscholand4617
2 жыл бұрын
It sounds like the Death from Terry Pratchetts Discworld has colleagues.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
I really need to get into reading Discworld
@donaldscholand4617
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 it's my favorite fantasy series. It will make you laugh, cry, and think in equal measure. Pratchett was a gifted artist. Each Discworld novel has a main plot and at least 3 subplots interwoven in perfect harmony. A big plus is that you can read them in any order. Each novel may reference other novels in the series, but each stands on its own merits.
@jlokison
2 жыл бұрын
That was established in the first Discworld book that focused on Death. If I recall correctly in some realities rather than robes, a scythe, and a pale horse the human death wears overalls and drives a combine harvester.
@DarkVeghetta
2 жыл бұрын
As someone who has given his kitty a Norse funeral and still has the ashes in a sealed urn (which I occasionally pet), I very much enjoy the author's interpretation of death and the soul. The bit at the end was hilarious and yet logically followed from what we saw occur throughout the story. GG.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you! Glad you liked it.
@DarkVeghetta
2 жыл бұрын
@@JimmyAgent007 Thank you for writing it.
@rheinbewachen1211
2 жыл бұрын
Me: sees BF1 medic *sees medics score high in kills in scoreboard with also a high score*
@johnathanblackwell9960
2 жыл бұрын
Had to send this to my buddy from 10th Mountain, he's a combat medic, he also thought is was hilarious...no we need one for combat engineers
@phoenixbugg7199
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your service and I'm glad you guys liked it.
@m.t.fguard8309
Жыл бұрын
Lol that part where the alien death says to human death you could have warned me that I would get punched in the face and he's like yes but it was fucking hilarious gets me every time
@engmed4400
11 ай бұрын
I've never been more proud to be a Combat Medic.
@exudeku
2 жыл бұрын
Hella funny that Human Death himself is ok with many forms of "death" made by various religions
@inquisitorwalmarius6650
2 жыл бұрын
it helps him mixing up his outfits XD
@lyrigageforge3259
10 ай бұрын
Well to think of it. If human Death is as you say fine with various deaths made by various religions - well one can also argue that the animals would need to get that soul from somewhere... It can't really be that humans just insist they do, that's not really how stuff is supposed to work - but then there is that religion where someone may end up reincarnating as one... And yea - I am still not sure that the writer actually wanted to make that point even it if it could be argued.
@lukkaredwolf3534
2 жыл бұрын
They are more of what you'd call guidelines than rules
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Death sets guidelines, humans make the rules.
@thenthson
2 жыл бұрын
Last one was a punch in the feels. Got a couple of tears out of me for the first time in a while. Only two though.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
That's what I was aiming for.
@Wolfrover
2 жыл бұрын
Heh. The second story contains the reason behind the first. We _will_ get attached. All those nonhuman creatures we care enough to give a piece of our soul to and make it their own? We love them like our own children. And we will take on apex predators twice our size for our children. So if it's that strong for a creature that cannot speak to us... how much stronger will it be for the ones that can? A human male once killed a full-grown grizzly with a bow and arrow to save his son. And the females? They're _scarier_ .
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Thanks for reading my story! Glad people seem to like it.
@Inanedata
2 жыл бұрын
I really enjoyed it a lot too!
@doctordoubledakka3939
2 жыл бұрын
yeah, super good. ending with a laugh is a great touch
@travisbishop782
2 жыл бұрын
It was freaking awesome! Great job!
@mason-ko1dp
Жыл бұрын
You made me cry. You asshole. It was to good.
@RaeontheLeft
Жыл бұрын
I love how these two stories make Humans out to be this wildcard that the universe can't handle and I love it.
@randomlyentertaining8287
Жыл бұрын
The medic one reminds me of something a veteran buddy of mine once said. "There's three things you should know about the Army. Butter Bars never know where they are, there is no E-4 Mafia, and Doc outranks the President."
@Le-cp9tr
Жыл бұрын
“Doctor, are you sure this will work?” “I HAVE NO IDEA!”
@jon12700
2 жыл бұрын
First story wasn't really catching me, but the second one had me actually crying a few tears of laughter and wholesomeness... Also when I heard about every loved pet having a soul, I've had to imagine a Reaper that never skidded Leg Day in running clothing, and just sprinting from house to house collecting poor hamsters, (which we all know never meet a natural ending and just being replaced before noticed xD)... But yeah.... I feel very sorry for every single Reaper after Humans got... There field of work will expand quite a bit...especially after all our religions and principles are expanding FTL... XD Beautiful video as always
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you! There are a lot of Deaths working with humans.
@deinnydoes5356
2 жыл бұрын
That is a delightful mental image. Thank you
@toasterhavingabath6980
5 ай бұрын
I do feel like "you dont have permission to die" is just the VERY ANGRY version of "i wont let you die here like this."
@DeanAdventure
Жыл бұрын
I am a former Doc with a CMB and this really got in my head. Good stuff.
@RealArcalian
2 жыл бұрын
Greetings, Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo Story 1: Sounds like we are the only ones who DO have compassion Story 2: This was indeed hilarious!
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you!
@miri5373
2 жыл бұрын
i adore the death story its just great to see death having fun
@henrypaleveda7760
2 жыл бұрын
okay, not every HFY story gets me but this one did , then end of the second was an unexpected laugh after all of that too.
@victorkane1154
2 жыл бұрын
Here I was thinking I'd be getting a dystopian story when in reality I was being shown the determination of medics to keep wounded soldiers alive from an alien culture's Point of view
@scar445
2 жыл бұрын
there is a very simple protocol to follow when engaging humans. 1: human tells you what to do. 2: you do it. end of protocol.
@mikkelnpetersen
9 ай бұрын
"I WILL SEW YOU BACK TOGETHER AND DRAG YOUR SOUL BACK FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL SO YOU CAN GET BACK TO FIGHTING" - average human medic on a tuesday.
@ashkaysnowhunter
2 жыл бұрын
These are amazing. I hope this author makes an anthology of short stories from this universe and publishes them.
@Zael_Moonblade
Жыл бұрын
First story was the just right level of grim and seriousness to set you up for the hilarity of the second one!
@normanhuman114
Жыл бұрын
As a former combat medic I can tell you that this is probably the most heartwarming thing I have ever heard.
@markuhler2664
2 жыл бұрын
The first story was good, the second ... damn, showed both, well, 2 viewpoints on death, done accurately, compassionately, and humorously.
@JimmyAgent007
2 жыл бұрын
Glad you liked it!
@atluscore6695
2 жыл бұрын
Human: Gets their entire leg blown off, several holes in there chest and bleeding from pretty much everywhere: Human medics: *"YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO DIE! YOU SHALL NOT DIE HERE, YOU SHALL DIE RETIRED FROM THE MILITARY AROUND YOUR FAMILY!" Human: "CMON MAN JUST LET ME DIE!" Death: 'I cant kill this one...' Also human medics: Punching fucking death in the face just to revive their fallen brother
@kloppanator
2 жыл бұрын
What do we say to death? Not today.
@therick7445
2 жыл бұрын
Just picturing a group of alien soldiers huddled together then running away screaming “Run for it, the human medic will save us all”
@seanm7349
7 ай бұрын
Being a former combat medic, I can confirm us "Docs" are the baddest mothers on the battlefield. Take a shot at one of us and see how long you live.
@Eboreg2
Жыл бұрын
Alien Death: "You reap the souls of their cats?!!" Human Death: "Cats, Dogs, Birds, Bears, Turtles, Wombats, hell... there were several times where I had to reap the soul of a Roomba." Alien Death: "What's a Roomba?" Human Death: "It's... better you not know."
@AnikaJarlsdottr
5 ай бұрын
I can imagine a human combat medic, drawing his sidearm on death when he gets too close to his patent. Death: "Time to collect another soul" Medic: *sounds of a hammer cocking* "back off"
@NerdyWordyMatt
2 жыл бұрын
Those two stories fit so well together. A great listen. Thank you.
@SFox-nf3bo
10 ай бұрын
The second story made me smile, humanity's love for animals is so strong that it forced death itself to expand it's capabilities. That's amazing. I just picture a person getting to the afterlife here and seeing that thier animals aren't there and they are just like "no not happening" turning punching death in the face and being like "where is my (pet type here)." I wonder if they have to collect a list of animals since you know dogs and cats and even fish have shorter life spans then humans.
@JimmyAgent007
10 ай бұрын
Exactly!
@lukerogers9348
2 жыл бұрын
Ok I'm a first time listener, but God damn those where good stories. Especially the second one. Therefore, I am announcing that I'll be subscribing to your channel (which I will admit, I've never announced a subscription before).
@AgroSquerril
2 жыл бұрын
Glad you enjoyed and thank you for the sub :)
@eleethtahgra7182
2 жыл бұрын
Zelotis n gloomis; healing or holding ritual. Humans; morphine and/or superglue...and sewing.
@Rivika84
3 ай бұрын
Humans; while punching Death in the face
@MarkLindon-nj7qm
Жыл бұрын
Bro death got punched and the human still held on to his body that’s a marine right there
Пікірлер: 816