Actually I was in the marines and they always tell you in an emergency situation to always piss on your hands for warmth. You might get even worse hypothermia afterward but they tell you to do it because they like it
@christopherdyson1158
Жыл бұрын
Just don't be like Ted Cruz. I heard Ted Cruz pisses his pants on purpose because he likes the warm feeling dripping down his legs.
@goodboiadvsp3297
Жыл бұрын
They like the warm wet feeling? That sounds like a Texas politician that I know
@Animallovercomedian
Жыл бұрын
@@goodboiadvsp3297 beat me to it
@Feasco
Жыл бұрын
I'm pretty sure that situation doesn't include "going to a restaurant and it's a little chilly"
@Jacob-Sophia
Жыл бұрын
@@Feasco They said always. That means always. Never not pissing on your hands at every opportunity.
@YouPear3
Жыл бұрын
“I went to a sports bar to watch a game-” “sounds true so far!” 😂😂😂
@kristyhernandez3844
Жыл бұрын
When griffin said "I was at a uh you know...sports bar" I had to pause the podcast because i was laughing to hard to hear anything else lmaoo
@GippyHappy
Жыл бұрын
Griffin has never sounded less convincing than when he said he as in a sports bar
@Doylt
Жыл бұрын
I tell you, it’s such a novel thing to see these guys in motion that I watch clips several times like 👁️👄👁️ “they’re real”
@mooselove
Жыл бұрын
I saw them live at candlenights a few years ago, it is pretty surreal
@PoopVintner
Жыл бұрын
Why does Griffin look like the third Green brother
@bob66071
Жыл бұрын
I'm glad I'm not the only one who sees it
@thatsdisco
Жыл бұрын
The G in Griffin stands for Green
@jjaemg576
Жыл бұрын
They loan him out for other brother themed podcasts
@yokaipup
Жыл бұрын
I'll never understand why you wouldn't wash your hands after peeing like, you touched the door??? The turrlet handle?? Other things in the world around you??? Why wouldn't you want the beautiful feeling of clean hands
@thanaGogical
Жыл бұрын
Absorb The Filth
@MsDianagentaToYou
Жыл бұрын
Yeah, you're touching all the things the people who *did* Touch It touched...
@sammyboy96
Жыл бұрын
Turrlet 🤣
@alydev23
Жыл бұрын
Sometimes, it gets on the outside of the turrlet, and then you knows you gotta wash your hands
@beatboxlanguage
Жыл бұрын
Some people just don’t like bein wet I guess
@blehwhatever4890
Жыл бұрын
This is such a crazy animation. Who did the rigging for this???
@Dr.JeremyDunks
Жыл бұрын
Baby Griff is grayer than his older boys
@YouLikeKrabbyPattiesDontYou
Жыл бұрын
as a fellow ibs-haver, it does that to you.
@sydneygorelick7484
Жыл бұрын
@@YouLikeKrabbyPattiesDontYou I was gonna say "it's the anxiety" but IBS is funnier
@jacobthompson1682
Жыл бұрын
I knew the "they taught us not to piss on our hands" punchline was going to drop. It's usually an ivy league banter joke but it still hit.
@Hey-Its-Dingo
Жыл бұрын
Funny personal detail: My phone hadn't loaded the quality yet, so it was blurry for a bit, them it finished and the quality loaded in right when it zoomed in on Griffin's face as he said "Sports Bar" lmao
@Troubled_waters
Жыл бұрын
my bf and I always say “didn’t touch it” when we get up to pee in the middle of the night
@2fortsmostwanted
Жыл бұрын
You know what they say. The couples who piss together…
@raimarulightning
Жыл бұрын
You don't know how badly I want you to be a woman for the sake of the joke, lmao
@Animallovercomedian
Жыл бұрын
So cursed. I’m gonna do this now Important note: I have the genitalia where you do always gotta touch it
@evie5375
Жыл бұрын
fr?
@weneedaladder8384
Жыл бұрын
In case anyone doesn't understand that line from Justin at the end, I'll post the whole joke here. An army soldier is using a urinal when a marine walks in next to him. The marine does his business, zips up, and starts walking towards the door. The army guy calls out after him: "In the army, they teach us to wash our hand after we piss" To which the Marine responds: "In the Marines, we're taught not to piss on our hands."
@Mattyoung44
Жыл бұрын
You dudes are the BEST!
@philipmeade7789
Жыл бұрын
I didn’t know Justin was a marine woe
@pigeon4422
Жыл бұрын
Yay mbmbam shorts
@ThouArtEverywhereAndNowhere
8 ай бұрын
Uhoh! Not so 30 under 30 now are we? I’m kidding. You will forever be media luminary, 30 under 30, Griffin McElroy
@haughtygarbage5848
Жыл бұрын
Why do penis havers always aim down.... maybe experiment w aiming up next time 🤔
@Teh_Bean
Жыл бұрын
Yeah, why aim into the toilet when you could do a trickshot 360 no-hands.
@2fortsmostwanted
Жыл бұрын
Yeah be creative once in a damn while
@PandaXs1
Жыл бұрын
I was like "yeah!" but then thought about the amount of control necessary to not hit the ceiling and arc it into the urinal
@roidroid
Жыл бұрын
In hindsight it was an unfortunate name, coz if i started a group of people who defined themselves by pissing on their hands - I'D CALL IT THE MARINES
@Glamador
Жыл бұрын
Ya know, I don't actually wash my hands every time at home. I'm steeped in my own filth anyway. But when I leave the house, or if I've in some way soiled my hands, I obviously wash them. And it's an *every time* event outside my home. I honestly didn't used to, because I'd heard the old wives tale that urine is sterile. I'd usually rinse, but rarely use soap. I'd use the drying towel to open the door after. But these days, with the benefit of years I don't deserve with that kind of behavior, I realize that the germs I have to worry about aren't the ones already on my dick.
@musicalcacophony
Жыл бұрын
Remind me to never trust a man's hands again
@GODZILLAmonsoon
Жыл бұрын
he right tho
@TheEnigmaticKasai
Жыл бұрын
But you got your grundle-stank on your hands, which is also terrible.
@beesforbreakfast
Жыл бұрын
Fun fact: healthy human urine is sterile! Getting rid of basement grode is actually the main reason to wash your hands!
@GODZILLAmonsoon
Жыл бұрын
@@TheEnigmaticKasai speak for yourself those are the words of a person what has a stank grundle. couldn't be me.
@rabbidbunnyz
Жыл бұрын
holy shit you guys this is so quiet i have my whole pc cranked up and I can't hear what you're saying. there's no volume slider on shorts. this is terrible
@50stressballs58
Жыл бұрын
That might be an issue with your pc dude im watching on my phone and it sounds fine
@hillsonn
Жыл бұрын
Sounds fine to me
@JulesJuno737
Жыл бұрын
I'm on PC and having the same problem. Weird! Do....do i still pee on my hands or?
@jaynenunya6070
Жыл бұрын
@@JulesJuno737 p on ur c
@Kirbyjer
10 ай бұрын
This is fine and the sound is normal to me, but go off ig
@dookieburrito9196
11 ай бұрын
3weirdo podcast
@RedSoul001
Жыл бұрын
No more observational "humor” (just observation honestly) from wizard posts please.
@davemustang8173
11 ай бұрын
Glad I stopped listening years ago. I can't imagine the level of libtard the podcast became during covid
@what2idiots
11 ай бұрын
Keep your grades up
@willowcrowluxx
7 ай бұрын
I big appreciate the OpenDyslexic font subtitles 🥹🥹💚
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