“I Wish I Were Gay” | Original Song
For Trevor Live NYC 2017
Composed (Music, Lyrics, Script) and Orchestrated by Rick McKee
Vocals Arranged by Tim Davis
Performed by Shoshana Bean and Jeremy Jordan
I was deeply honored to be a part of this event... The Trevor Project is an incredible organization, and they are here for you!!!
www.thetrevorpr...
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The glitz, the glamour, begets cabaret.
When life’s a drag, paint it up just like a Monet!
It’s queer, but it’s time for coming out to say:
Gee, I wish I were…
I WISH I WERE GAY!!
Short-shorts in winter and flannel in May,
Reports say December’s not the only time for the SLAY!
Transform me to chic out of my déclassé!
Gee, I wish I were gay!
Playboy, for reading, is never a lie,
And “masc for masc” ain’t a Phantom costume supply!
And, “girlfriend” is nay, a “girl” nor “friend” reply!
Hey, I wish I were gay!
With nary but an ancillary turn of a phrase,
Proving Yiddish isn’t only for the Jews,
OY VEY!
With their care-selected, interjected shtick dossiers,
They can show you their ways - care to try?
Wouldn’t you?!
Elated while next to the similar sex?
Maybe you could traverse either way!
If this isn’t you, be an ally through and through!
But, gee! I wish I were gay!!
You can pass on desert, never skipping the cake!
When lo, a jock-strap, does not, a proper jock, make!
When the big and the little spoon can - alternate,
Then hey, you’d wish you were gay!
If your “everyday purse” is a photographer’s vest…
Something about Sarah Lawerence!
If it’s spelled with a “z”, you fall-out for sake of an “s”…
Oh, ’Cause Liza with a Z goes “Z” not “S” - I knew that one…
Then you’ll double your wardrobe when he/ she says, “yes!!”
Hooray!
You’ll wish you were gay!!
A diva shan’t achieve a higher seat in the ranks,
Than to be a chant-receiver to the pride!
Every Barbara, Liza, Judy belt was rolling the banks!
Sixteen bars in a spanx? Hell, I’d give that a try!
When the library’s open, and girls are all golden,
You know you’re among your posse!
Are there dues we can pay?!
Maybe points to accrue?!
I just wish I were gay!
Honey, we wish it, too!!
Thank you all! What a gift, if it only could last.
So a toast to our friends, taking life up the -
…OCTAVE!!!
Gee, I wish…
Oh I wish…
Glory, how… I wish I were…
Gay!!
I wish I were gay!!
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