OMA's Milstein Hall is a song about architectural failure, written to promote my new book of the same title (see jonochshorn.com/milsteinhall/). About the book: in addition to some general observations and an occasional digression, it's a rather detailed examination of dysfunction, inflexibility, fire hazard, nonstructural failure, and unsustainable design in the flagship building designed by the Office for Metropolitan Architecture (OMA) for Cornell's College of Architecture, Art and Planning. The book does not rehash the underlying theoretical arguments for nonstructural failure that appeared in my prior book, Building Bad; instead, it examines what such failure looks like in a single building-as a case study. In writing this song about the book, I started off by asking a question: What were they thinking when this design was made?
OMA's Milstein Hall
Words and music © 2024 Jonathan Ochshorn
VERSE 1a: What were they thinking when this design was made
No one's eating and no one's drinking inside the arcade
Cause it's cold and dark and dismal sitting in the shade
VERSE 1b: Acoustic issues unaddressed-sound goes everywhere
While windows facing to the west create annoying glare
Good luck, professor, if you have to give a lecture there
CHORUS 1: In OMA's Milstein Hall-trapped inside a curtainwall
It's neither atrium nor mall but it's got a junkspace pedigree
With shimmering mirrors, hybrid trusses, spatial continuity
VERSE 2: Unrestricted heat flow causes heat loss and heat gain
Thermal bridges melt the snow-but nothing stops the rain
The green roof can't absorb it so it courses down the drain
CHORUS 2: In OMA's Milstein Hall-just when you think you've seen it all
There's a paranoid-critical toilet stall to be deliriously enjoyed
But no water-saving strategies are seriously employed
VERSE 3: Cracking everywhere that matters-everywhere you face
A glass guard shatters; metal trim falls out of place
Protruding objects threaten people walking in the space
CHORUS 3: In OMA's Milstein Hall-they say pride comes before a fall
So they rip it up and reinstall the things that broke apart
In terms of architectural failure it's state-of-the-art
Instrumental chorus
VERSE 4: The crit room needs another fire door for the occupancy load
While the size of the second floor exceeds limits in the code
All these life- and fire-safety issues are just waiting to explode
CHORUS 4: In OMA's Milstein Hall-they never built a fire wall
Yet architecture critics remain in thrall they don't see the mess
Dangerous, dysfunctional-this building's in distress
VERSE 5: It's been leaking when it rains from the roof to the foundation
They built a plaza with no drains-an inexplicable aberration /Inviting litigation / Defying gravitation / Causing efflorescent encrustation
And there's many more examples in my latest publication
CHORUS 5a: It's called OMA's Milstein Hall-it's a case study that tells it all
It's purpose is to help forestall making buildings that are bad
To promote health, safety, and welfare; and resist the latest fad
CHORUS 5b: Once again, the book is called OMA's Milstein Hall
No, you won't find it at the mall
So if you really want to read it all go to jonochshorn.com
For a free pdf or a purchase on Amazon
Yes you can read it on the web, download a pdf, or you can buy it on Amazon
For more of my music: jonochshorn.com/music/
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