This is why you're stressed. You worry too much about others and want them to be like you. This is not 1975. Some of these relatives events are exhausting. Invitation is optional. If you need them to help , you have to ask a different way. I run my events without expectation of others to come help me. I don't even get upset if people come and not lift a finger.
@maipha8560
Жыл бұрын
Same here! With our without people helping with cooking or washing the dishes, the show goes on. Cooking and catering costs about the same, probably less, in my opinion. Plus no messy clean up in the end. When I put an event together, I don't do it expecting people to show up to help cook and clean.
@diavang3633
Жыл бұрын
That why some people go to church and let church members help. U don't have this stress
@vkhachannel244
Жыл бұрын
Zoo kawg li, yog ib yam ua peb yuav tau xyaum thiab pom lwm tus txoj kev hlub thiab tej txiaj ntsim uas luag ua rau yus.
@nkaujhmoobvaj1491
Жыл бұрын
That’s right! U guys did the right thing. I only help those who help me.
@nalaher3022
Жыл бұрын
Very important lesson for those who still choose to practice hmong traditions. That tradition is heavily food centered. I have experienced people not reciprocating my kindness when I needed it, too. So there is no guarantee that you will get returns for your investment in people. I can only say that money takes care of all. So save money for events. Invite people to come join your elebrations without having to cook their own food. I am not afraid to express that I dislike hmong celebrations because I always have to help cook the food I'm going to eat. At my daughter's wedding, not one person on the invitation list had to lend a hand to bring food to the table. We catered, and the food was clean, well prepped, and there was quality. Leave the cooking to professionals. If you are organized, you can take care of every detail. Ask/pay friends and people outside of family circles to help out so families can enjoy time together. And vice versa solicit your services to help friends so they can enjoy time with their families. Hmong hlub hmong, this is possible. Remember, not everyone knows how to cook.
@maipha8560
Жыл бұрын
Well said! I agree with you completely. We are lucky to have lots of options when it comes to catering. Important events are meant to spend time with people and not so much all that cooking and cleaning. It costs about the same plus no clean up and no one is obligated to come cook and clean especially when they are already in their best outfits.
@pnvang2
Жыл бұрын
I agree with you sis. I want family, friends to enjoy an event so I always most of the time catered.
@maryly09
Жыл бұрын
Agree. If u have money, then cater. If u don't have money and still depends or expects families to come help, then u also need to make sure u show up to their events and help them too. Not like the sil in this story where she never helped anyone but still cried when no one helped her. Life is all about give and receive.
@michaelf2700
Жыл бұрын
If someone doesnt want to help u, then u r not obligated to help them. If u do something for someone, then do it out of the goodness of ur heart & dont expect anything back.
@leepoultry
Жыл бұрын
Good lesson for some people.
@Fromspam09
Жыл бұрын
I am glad to hear you and most of your SIL get along but not every women out there is as kind and team player. Just let her do her thing.
@maipha8560
Жыл бұрын
Perhaps this SIL os not talented in cooking and organizing an event but in other area. I don't understand why some Hmong women still have the 1975 mentality and only expect people to come cook and clean.
@maryly09
Жыл бұрын
@@maipha8560 whether she may have been talented in other events and not cooking or cleaning, the point is she never showed up to any of her immediate family events. U don't need to be a chef to show up and help such like washing ans cutting the veggies. I'm sure every woman knows how to do that in her own house. She just doesn't value them or think they're important enough to give her time to them. That's why it backfired on her. She got a taste of her own medicine and realized it was poison.
@ouradventuresnspecialmoments
Жыл бұрын
I understand your frustration...Some people are just too lazy! 🤦🏻♀️
@meelee9553
Жыл бұрын
Auntie.. you and the other 6 ladies sounds like bully to me. If you’re going to a family function and be mad , then don’t go to the event. No need to make fun of anybody. You’re no different. Don’t matter if you’re family or not.😢
@maryly09
Жыл бұрын
I'm sorry but if u don't help me, what makes u think I'll help u? Maybe 3 to 4 times I'll help without expecting anything. But if i continue to see that i am worth nothing to u and u don't even value me and don't think I'm worthy to come help me or attend my events, then what in the world makes u think i will continue to bend backward for u? What rights do u have? Good thing u guys taught her a lesson. Ppl like her in life will never learn or know until they learned. If u guys had taken charge of her party then she will forever depend on u guys and never see you guys worthy.
@maipha8560
Жыл бұрын
Gosh, the lady who gave this story to Jenny is annoying. No one can make you do or force you to help. If you don't want to help than please don't mock the other person and laugh at them. It actually make you sound like you're the evil witch. If you end up helping her at the end, than I'm not sure why you don't help her at the beginning. Based on what you say, you shouldn't show up at all. I don't know, you tell her to grow and be a mature adult, I think you could use your own advice.
@chengxiong9980
Жыл бұрын
Yog. Tus poj hmoob no mas tsis tsaj muag nus xa tias nus yog tus zoo thiab paub tab tshaj tab sis nus muab qhua nus tus kheej dhau. Tsis muaj cai yuav yuam lum tus ua kom raws li nus nyiam mas thiaj yog. Tsis yog xyoo 75. Nyias muaj nyia txoj kev xa. Kiag nus tus txiv tus me tub me nyuam los muaj qee zaug yeej ua tsis tau li nus hais thiab. Poj hmoob dab tsis yog yus xa ua ces yus kuj ua yus xwb. Tsis paub txaj muag tsawm tuaj tham tib tug dhua plu ntsuav. Cov zoo li tus pog hmoob no mas ntse tau yog nus tsev neeg mas ntse nus yuav ua nai thiab ua tus tsuj txua tus xwb. ua tsis raws li nus lub hom phia mas nus tias tus ntawv yog tus phem xwb. Cov poj hmoob zoo li tus no ntshai tsam tej tub tej ntxhai lam yuav yuam kev tsev neeg phem zoo li tus poj hmoob no xwb os.
@Springadel7775
Жыл бұрын
Agree!
@moniqueartea7047
Жыл бұрын
kv tsis paub nej tab sis kv tus kheej kiag ces lawv cov hlob hlob lawv los ua ntej lawv yeej tsis nyiam yus yg tus yau lawv ua dab tsi mas lawv yaum lawv cov hlob xwb tsis hais cov niam ncaus hlob los yg cov muam hlob los yeej 1 nqag 1 nqag ua ke xwb thiab lawv xaiv neeg nyiam xwb thiab ov
Tsis tau yog cai rau nej nroo txog nej ib pab poj niam sab nrauv los yuav nej coj txiv koom niam thiab txiv yug, ib pab viv ncaus koom niam thiab txiv yug los ntawm ib lub plab thooj ib lub cev kiag tseem tsis sib haum qees vim nyias muaj nyias ntsej muag ces nyiss yuam tsum muaj nyias txoj kev xav yam sib txawv lawm deeb heev.
@dolliilov3144
Жыл бұрын
I couldnt finish this story because it's so childish! Sister you say you're not jealous but in reality you are! This is nothing important but complaining complaining. Who cares what others do! You do you and that's all that really matters! I only gave this story a thumbs up because of Jenny.
@microbiologist50
Жыл бұрын
Great tips
@ThePrincessWorrior
Жыл бұрын
Great tips to SELF for sure
@MrsKervang
Жыл бұрын
This sister sounds bitter 😑.
@maipha8560
Жыл бұрын
I have the same thought, too. If you're bitter about it, don't show up or go help and let her know you don't give a f*ck. Stop complaining and laughing at people when they have already fallen on the ground.
@c.lee-soulisak327
Жыл бұрын
Lols...I commented first and then read other comments. My first thought when listening was..this lady is sooo bitter!!! 😂
@appleblossom5894
Жыл бұрын
Cov hlob los tejzaum pheej yuav yuav cai thiab. Yog yus zoo ces tsis yuav kom luag thov yus.
@larryxiong9558
Жыл бұрын
Peb ib tsev tib neeg muaj ib tus os cov vivncaus aws yog yus tsi paub pab luag thiab yeej yuav zoo li nws mas nws yeej pauj tsi tau yus li os hmoob.
@xaihlub34
Жыл бұрын
I think if you keep helping them, they will not learn to appreciate you or how it feels to have no one when you need help.
@maylovang1880
Жыл бұрын
Cov niam tsev pheej tuaj hais lwm tus li no, kuv xav kom nej kaw nej lub qhov ncauj me ntsis thiab yog nws twb tsis pab nej npaum li no lawm, yus kuj tsis txhob mus pab nws thiab los pob. Yus twb zoo yus siab mus pab lawm. Pab tag tsis txhob cem cem luag thiab nawb mog.
@ThePrincessWorrior
Жыл бұрын
Yom
@pahoualee6059
Жыл бұрын
Hehe…ib pab kwvtij thiab niamncaus ces yeej muaj ib tus coj kiag li nod os me vivncaus aw.
@MsBL32
Жыл бұрын
I work weekends and can’t come help. People don’t understand that! I wish I could help but I can’t.
@denamoua7262
Жыл бұрын
Zaj no raug kuv lub neej ua luaj.kuv tus niam nrxawm niam tij ces siv hlwb ib yam li no rau kuv thiab.kuv dhuav txoj kev pab kwv tij los tau 20+ xyoo no lawm...cov neeg zoo li no lawv tub nkeeg siab phem cia zog xwb...😢
@pamthao8955
Жыл бұрын
It not your sister in law who have problems you are because you keep helping her
@MySunshine71
Жыл бұрын
Cater! If you can't afford to cater keep it simple and don't cook too many dishes. Cook likes how people used to cook in the 70s....1 tray of rice and another tray of boiled pork with green mustard and a side of chili pepper will do just fine at all the events 🤣 Nowadays, housewives are going way overboard with all their cooking and decorating at all the events and it's annoying and costly
@whatheck6797
Жыл бұрын
Or might as well don’t host a party if you can’t handle/afford 😅
@khuevang9805
Жыл бұрын
Luag ntse tshaj yus ces txhob complaint..
@ashton8878
Жыл бұрын
Nah, I don’t associate with anyone and I don’t expect anyone to do anything for me.
@ThePrincessWorrior
Жыл бұрын
🤔 And…why is that your problem? They don’t k you, you don’t have to k k them, done, case close, end, that’s all. Why is their problem your problem, if you truly not jealous not xam khib of them? 😂
@maipha8560
Жыл бұрын
Yog kawg! 🤣
@jackieyunan4899
Жыл бұрын
Cov nyab tshiab tam sim no yeej tub nkeeg li no nawb lawv aw...
@txujci6922
Жыл бұрын
Sounds like some people I know 😂 the wannabe PaTha and want face but they have no money .
@SV-xb1rg
Жыл бұрын
You guys are a bunch of bullies. Just stop “helping” if you’re only doing it to get something in return. You’re not helping, you’re trading labor.
@hlubyang4072
Жыл бұрын
Tu neeg es nws saib nws sab neej tsa thiab phooj ywg tseem ceeb tshaj kwv tij ces cia nws peem nws ntag...txog kwv tij ces nws tsis xav pab yog txog nws cia nws ua nws ntag hos
@zaubab4023
Жыл бұрын
I want to hear her side of the story. I have seen too much to just believe a one side story.
@kimberlyvx
Жыл бұрын
I would really hate to have a niam tij like you! You're too 1975. Get over it, she likes to do her own things, let her. If you dont feel like helping her when it comes to her events, don't help, youre not obligated. By you coming on here to tell your story, it doesnt make you look like you're any better than her. I too have alot of sils, we have our own difference and we alll get along but i would never expect my sils to always drop everything and help me, if they have plans, they go do their own things. If it's my party, with or without them, the show goes on. As long I'm mutual and civilized with them, i can careless what they do with their time and life. You just sounds like a typical 1975 unhappy woman who will find anything to use against someone you probably don't like from the beginning. It's sad how you also saying you're speaking for the rest of your sils. I doubt all of them agree with you too.
@user-bw9ro3jz4v
Жыл бұрын
I'm sorry, if you don't like the fact that your niam ntxawm doesn't help you guys.... at least don't make others go along with you. You don't wanna help her, its fine... but don't drag others to be a part of your game. I know the feeling that you are going through. I've been in your shoe. Just do you. Don't worry too much about those who doesn't help you. Do your job and leave.
@akulathao4654
Жыл бұрын
Lady!! You complain but still help her out? Me, i put my head between my legs and play dumb 😂😂😂😂
@Princessyaj
Жыл бұрын
Ohhhh 😓😓😓🫣🫣 sounds like a huge headache
@sunnygirl973
Жыл бұрын
UA cas koj tseem khe khe nws thiab na ! Kav Liam nws los mos. Nws mam NTI nws kaub puab os!
@gynnsworld
Жыл бұрын
Hmong people “expectation without communications”. Not everyone is a mind reader. Don’t do things and expect things in return. And if you help, simply ask. Sometimes, people don’t want or need your help but they just don’t want to say anything because that may come off rude. Too much expectation.
@maiyang3659
Жыл бұрын
Peb hlob thib niam hlob nkawd Ib niam txiv mas coj kiag li ko thag. Thaum twg tias yuav ua ib pluas noj mas Tsis paub npaj ua ntej li, twb txog hnub uas ua party lawm mas mam sawv mus yuav koom, txog ciaj noj los yeej tsis tiab. Thaum luag ua party noj mas nws tuaj txog ces tuaj zaum pem sofa tos luag ua tau ces mam los noj xwb.
@That1dv
Жыл бұрын
You are bullying. If she doesn’t help you and you don’t like her, don’t help her and stop going around. Cut ties, stop being fake. Let her do her and you do you.
@Louni125
Жыл бұрын
This lady is so snobby. Her and her sis in laws are bullies. If she dont help then dont help her and be honest to her face. Why wait decades to then turn your back on her.
@thestoryofmylife6979
Жыл бұрын
Not everyone thinks like you lady. Not everyone wants to be teachers pet ok.
@m.muaslis6902
Жыл бұрын
The lady sharing this story sounds too boastful. Just stop! No one is mean or evil just because they dont help you like you do to them. 🤦♀️
Пікірлер: 66