I'm going to be starting my journey to getting better on here. I'm sick of how far my mental illness has taken me. I hope you stick around for the ride and even for the highs and lows.
@michaelhalbert-q2f
11 күн бұрын
I had a stroke a few years ago and then suffered depression like I could have never imagined. I understand what you're feeling to some extent. If it's any help you look great, sound intelligent and thoughtful. I hope someday you will see yourself as others do. Stay strong!
@soindifferent_
12 күн бұрын
You are far from insecure. The fact you can sit in front of a camera and be this raw is far from insecure. It takes certain level of strength to open up like this. I appreciate your rawness and openness. Things will get better.
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
💞💞 Thank you so much
@Luke-j5x
12 күн бұрын
You are so relatable. The fact that you can put words to this stuff and address it on video amazes me. You are not a failure. You stay true to yourself and all these benchmarks are nothing more than ridiculous social constructs. I had the same black hole mindset since I dropped out of college. Don’t be ashamed of the way life goes because there is no rule book to this shit. We are all just trying to navigate this f’ed up world.
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
Thank you so much for saying this 💞 it really means a lot to me :) I always try to stay as true to myself as I can even when I feel all the pressure from the "norms", but it's the thing I really cherish the most. It's hard to be that way in today's world, but it's the most beautiful thing we can do.
@kingjman2597
12 күн бұрын
Hopefully things get better
@mrusso965
13 күн бұрын
Ill always stick around for your highs and lows
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
💞💞
@Whenallwozkool
12 күн бұрын
I think you're awesome. Sending love, strength, peace and happiness from the UK!
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
Aww thank you so much!! ☺💞
@astrayzoomer2003
Күн бұрын
I'm very cold and distant. I can relate to everything you said but I think I deserve to be alone. no one wants to deal with me. I can't bring myself to care for someone if my life depended on it
@nataliedallimore3218
13 күн бұрын
I have suffered for PMDD for years and didn't know. I feel for you so much! I've been eating a whole food plant-based diet for the last 3 months and it is helped me so much! I feel like mornings to come out about pmdd and they need to do a documentary. Unless they have done one. Let me know.❤
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
I feel for you, sending so much love 💞 PMDD is such a scary disorder and it's barely discussed anywhere, the switches can be so drastic and it literally feels like becoming a different person. I haven't seen documentaries but there are reddits that are so helpful to follow because everyone is experiencing and documenting and validating and supporting each other. They have you fill out a form first to be allowed in the subreddit so it's only for people with pmdd and not trolls. It's under r/PMDD. It's been a great help and people give amazing advice on how to manage. I'm going to try out the whole food diet, I'm hoping it will work for me as well.
@Warmolt48
12 күн бұрын
I think the mourning of the previous self is quite natural, because you are used to being able to do so much and then suddenly being able to only work 4 hours, ofcourse that sucks. I've been there, But I feel like the selfhatred you get is worse than actually not being able to do what you once could. For myself the acceptance of feeling shitty and living shitty makes me work it somewhat emotionally thru... Then I have days where I don't cook and sleep whole days... And if you slowely make positive steps (also accepting your need to retreat is positive) You'll slowely feel more satisfied, but it works also the other way around, the negative the anxiety and the daydreaming without commitment. Then you feel even more sucky by just sitting there and the cycle continues. Now you feel shit and you say i wanna do this; but axiety or some other hurdle fucks your motivation then it's also okay to say welp fuck it: I'm incapable today. And even the presedent is just fucking around... Goodluck my dude!
@Warmolt48
12 күн бұрын
Also idk if you live in a city, but walking in nature and either screaming your ass off or just embracing the beauty. Nature does something very powerfull, especially for someone sensitive.
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
you explained it perfectly 💞the self-hatred makes it so much harder to push through but it's so easy to get trapped in that cycle. I think I fail at getting better because I try to change everything so drastically and in a perfectionist way. I guess another form of self-sabotage. It's all about learning to give yourself grace and the space to grow. I want to try to get out in nature like I used to, especially this fall and on rainy days. Thank you for your comment it makes me feel less alone from how accurate it is to how I feel :)
@Warmolt48
11 күн бұрын
@@enzagualtieri6643 I'm learning myself that when I feel grumpy people still listen to me and respect me eventhough I'm not so JOLLY AND HAPPY aka i don't feel like i show my perfect side... it frustrates me... but I'm also glad no body cares except for me!
@Warmolt48
11 күн бұрын
And being able to do baby steps and being somewhat happy about the baby steps is what has had helped me the most. Plus my lows are now better managed and quicker... Because we're running at like 20% of our capabilities right now so not able to do everything is normal... And having the hope that one day you'll reach that 80% and be a "functioning human"
@Warmolt48
11 күн бұрын
Ps I'm 25 :P
@Musical_parks
7 күн бұрын
BPD is agony, pure agony. That’s what it is for the sufferer and that’s what it is for the people around the sufferer. Healing is necessary. You said your a Virgo so if your open minded to that stuff then connecting to the spiritual can be immensely helpful. I suggest shadow work it helps in my own experience. Remember, BPD does have a hopeful remission rate with treatment and proper care. On another note, I feel if you found someone else with the disorder and got close with them it would either go badly or really helpful y’know 🎲
@Chrisbi-Wan
12 күн бұрын
The honesty is appreciated. I'm barely holding myself back from saying your issues could have a spiritual root as I know that kind of advice is often not appreciated but - oops, I guess I already said it.
@Musical_parks
7 күн бұрын
BPD originates from trauma in early childhood. I guess spiritually speaking it could be something that is a repeated cycle through incarnations, in which case you hope she can get it this time around. The disorder itself definitely brings in dark energies but the actual root is very complex
@WizloBaggins
13 күн бұрын
Journaling/Vlogs would certainly help out. I may not be an original watcher of your content, but I do find you personality traits strongly wild, for better or worse. I would type more on your dilemma but it's probably crap you've heard many times. So, I'll leave it like this and hope for the best. Stay safe Enza, from one anon to another!
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
Thank you :) 💞 Definitely will be vlogging and sharing journal entries like I used to
@mendi881
13 күн бұрын
OMG, I have an immense urge to hug you. ❤❤
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
💞💞
@californiagrapes6761
12 күн бұрын
I battle bpd, well bpd beats the shit outta me.
@enzagualtieri6643
12 күн бұрын
I feel that heavy
@kunalshitole3419
13 күн бұрын
sorry to hear you're suffering so much but i know how it feels to diagnosed with depression and living with it. Last month my therapist suggested me to book a session of Psych-K and from there I've seen lot of positive changes in me. Please give it try
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