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NUMB THE PAIN
WRITTEN BY TANIS PELLEGRINI, LIVES LOST
PREPRODUCTION BY LEE FENSTAMAKER
ENGINEERED BY EVAN SEEBERGER, JEFF MCKINNON
PRODUCED BY JEFF MCKINNON, LIVES LOST
MIX/MASTER BY JEFF MCKINNON
about the song:
NUMB THE PAIN is a song about my personal struggles with addiction. Through an involuntary committal to a Mental Hospital on the eve of my 18th birthday. I was then introduced to prescription painkillers from another person on the adult unit I was placed in, and began a descent into substance abuse.
My teens and early 20s were filled with struggles with my mental health due to an unstable environment at home which lead me to Combine my already existing Alcohol use with traumatic brain injuries, and my tumultuous homelife, I was heading in the wrong direction. I began acting out, and doing whatever I could to risk take.Leading inevitably to several involuntary commitments and being kicked out of my parents' house right after my final inpatient stay.
For me, this song is incredible personal, and as with most of our lyrical content is rooted deeply in my reality. We all struggle with something, and this is a song about how this manifests physically and mentally. I am so blessed to be here. Thank you for reading, and please enjoy
LYRICS:
Verse 1
I think I've lost my nerve
My mind runs in circles. I can't shake this curse
I've learned to hate myself
Feel the shame
Buried in memories that hurt
vocal turnaround
I look inside. What do I see
This person I hate staring back at me
(Pills won't set me free)
Chorus:
Medicate
Let the mirror lie (i see that im not fine)
Numb the pain
I close my eyes
Nothing left
There is no place to hide
Numb the pain
I close my eyes
These pills aren't working
My face flushes red
So much for coping
Fuck what you said
The voice inside my head
"Burn it now flip it all upside down "
Drink up Blackout again
Out again
out again
I look in the mirror what do I see
This person I hate staring back at me
THIS HELL IN MY HEAD
AM I BETTER OFF DEAD
Chorus
Medicate
Let the mirror lie (i see that im not fine)
Numb the pain
I close my eyes
Nothing left
No place to hide
Numb the pain
I close my eyes
Burn it down burn it down hope my life will turnaround
Im blacking out my feet wont touch the ground
Addicted to fame
Prescribe me some pain
Prison inside
My vision will fade
Everything
Everything
Pills won't set me free
Chorus (x2)
Medicate
Let the mirror lie (i see that im not fine)
Numb the pain
I close my eyes
Nothing left
No place to hide
Numb the pain
I close my eyes
Am I better off dead
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