Mark is an absolute unit when it comes to OCD (mental health). There are very few of you and I don’t say that lightly, being in the mental health field myself. Keep doing what you’re doing my friend.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks, Mike!
@Lorenzo_Marchetti4537
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain Question, in your experience can the prevalence of unique personality traits we all have at a young age for instance overthinking, over sensitivity, obsessing etc. lead a person to develop an anxiety disorder? Also in terms of structural abnormalities in the brain, would you say that it’s an effect of anxiety or a cause of anxiety? Can a person physically change their brains so that whatever dysfunction was developed is no more? Sorry I’m very interested in your input 😀
@Lorenzo_Marchetti4537
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain In my studies I’ve read that the prevalence to having anxiety disorders/depression is a permanent part of a person’s psychological makeup, in other words the risk factor is always there. But watching your videos as well as your story it seems you put an emphasis on mental fitness as the “cure” for anxiety disorders and depression. Can we heal the brain or are these disorders something in the background waiting for a moment of psychological and physiological weakness?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
The thing is, studies that make some link to a brain difference are often small and don't replicate when the study size is increased AND there'd be no way to know if it was the result or the cause. Repetitive action elsewhere in the body has an effect, so it would seem kinda normal for the body if repetitive actions in the brain affected it as well. But if somebody eats a lot of food repeatedly and that changes their body, is that an abnormality? Isn't that exactly how the body is supposed to work? If somebody choose to pay attention to only one thing and then think about it over and over again and spend lots of time on a particular compulsion, it's likely that will affect their body in many ways. If they have a handwashing compulsion, that can affect their body from the skin, to the nerves, to the immune system and likely the brain as well. But everything is working correctly. I had to choose to stop doing the compulsion.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I haven't seen any evidence that risk factors are persistent. In fact, I can think of a bunch of research showing that genetic risk factors are ameliorated by learned skills and environmental resources. For example, a study just came out looking at genetic risk factors for PTSD and they found that traumatic events and genetic risk factors did not guarantee a person develops PTSD if they had healthy social skills: news.yale.edu/2020/10/01/nurture-trumps-nature-determining-severity-ptsd-symptoms I've seen a similar study on depression genetic risk where a gene variant once touted as "the depression gene" was later found to be just as prevalent amongst people with great mental health. So this again would target the idea that these are even inherently problems. It's like with physical fitness: some people put on weight easily, and if you're into sports where that's advantageous, that's a huge benefit. But if you don't play sports, then you might see it as a problem. Or conversely, I have to eat a ton of food when I'm bulking up. I see that as a challenge. But others might see it as a great physical benefit to have a high metabolism. There's nothing to "heal" though. It's just about learning how to game the system.
@abdullahisugulle
7 ай бұрын
Second time watching this video now, the first time I watched it was in 2021 when I first began my journey to recovery from mental illness, and this time around I can actually understand the concepts a lot more than I did in my first watch.
@everybodyhasabrain
7 ай бұрын
That's great you're understanding how to apply the concepts on your own journey!
@Maciej1997
3 жыл бұрын
I hope you never stop making videos. I've been watching your stuff for years and you've even responded to my emails when needing extra help. You're a good dude
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks!
@worriertowarrior7169
3 жыл бұрын
Hi Mark. Checking in on your channel again after experiencing psychosis and a long 5 years of recovery, meds, etc. Starting to taper off the meds now that I'm in better control. Hoping to keep up with your videos again. Great work you are my fav on OCD - tricky stuff.
@sebastianrooks6778
3 жыл бұрын
Your book and your videos are helping my partner. Thank you.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
That's great to hear they're finding them useful on their journey!
@PrincessSelena7
3 жыл бұрын
I love your sense of humor. It really makes me realize how ridiculous some of the stuff I ruminate on is.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks, Ashley! It is so useful to laugh at it!
@ee-hd2is
2 жыл бұрын
Just found this 🙏🙏
@everybodyhasabrain
2 жыл бұрын
Shift that locus of control!
@gurdevsingh5637
3 жыл бұрын
Mark, I am trying to stay mindfull, like when I start the very first day these exercises pump me up and I properly in present moment but gradually these exercises become less effective and I slip back to my past self. I just don't know what I am lacking.
@russianpaul77
3 жыл бұрын
we have to be ok with the compulsions being there and then redirect our focus to something we want to do. we have to accept that we can feel any way while we do the things we want to. it's the judging that we're not in the present moment, or that we have to feel a certain way otherwise we're slipping back, that's the trap, it's that uncertainty curve mark talks about, it always feels like it's getting worse before it gets better. we just accept the feelings are there and continue to do what we want while being ok with coexisting with these thoughts. it's really a mental trick. we just have to stay on course even if it "feels" like we're slipping back. you aren't lacking anything! our brains have become addicted to a certain stimuli and we are breaking this addiction.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
You're not lacking anything. But it sounds like you're shifting the locus of control onto the exercises. They aren't effective. YOU are effective. These are changes that you need to make. Slipping back into our past habits is about actions we do. So if you can see yourself going back to those old habits, that's an opportunity to look at what changes you want to make. How do you talk yourself back into the old habits? Those are things you can change.
@abdullahisugulle
7 ай бұрын
Thanks for this awesome video. I will try to add that practice into my life of where I'm positioning the locus of control.
@everybodyhasabrain
7 ай бұрын
Have fun exploring where you position control!
@billwilder1340
11 ай бұрын
Great information on locus of control ! Thanks for doing the research
@everybodyhasabrain
11 ай бұрын
Thanks for watching!
@wandersonmeireles6499
3 жыл бұрын
Wednesdays are my favorite days now because of The Lab. These kind of lives in which Mark teach how to put what he says into practice (using slides, writing stuff etc) are the most helpful videos he's been making. It's fucking cool, it's like free therapy
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
:) It's FREE and it's BETTER than therapy 🤣
@wanmeireles7182
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain Agreed
@arielllerena8355
3 жыл бұрын
I just want to say thank you Mark, I struggle with OCD and I bought your book You Are Not A Rock and it has helped me I will definitely listen to it again
@arielllerena8355
3 жыл бұрын
Particularly the part when you talk about “if x, then x”
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad you've found it useful, Matt! Enjoy letting things be as they are :)
@theboogie_monsta
2 жыл бұрын
The word compulsion comes from 'compelled', i.e. subjective feeling that you don't have control, are not choosing the behaviour. Realising that, no, you can choose, and developing the ability to choose - this puts locus of control in the right place and also happens to be the opposite of compulsions.
@yfoog
3 жыл бұрын
Oh my god this is exactly what I needed today!!!! And every day. Very, very important point. Slam dunk Mark!!!
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad it was on time!
@vivaldirules
3 жыл бұрын
Like your other videos, this was really useful. What I thought was going to be fairly obvious and so not worth the hour to watch was actually quite involved and thought-provoking. I very much appreciate it, Mark. And...I AM GOING TO DIGEST THIS FURTHER EVERY MORNING THIS WEEK TO FIND PLACES WHERE I CAN MAKE CHANGES TO MY ATTITUDES AND ACTIONS, SEEK HELP WHEN I NEED IT, AND TAKE MORE RESPONSIBILITY FOR AND IMPROVE THE THINGS I DO IN MY LIFE. As an aside, I would appreciate it if someone would start a rock band named The Locusts of Control with a donut-eating llama as the lead guitarist. :)
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
:D That will be the greatest band.
@Sadiq1282
3 жыл бұрын
Superb ! Amazing ! Wonderful Stuff Mark..Keep Goin n Thanx a Lot for your efforts.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you, Sadiq!
@SKRithvik
3 жыл бұрын
Yet another amazing session Mark ! Your vision to make mental health tools accessible to all is truly amazing. I got stuck expecting some other person to behave a certain way. It’s out of my control and I then gave up doing things that I cared about. I keep trying to”time travel” to fix it. You have sometimes spoken about the illusion of closure. In this session, you talk about how it’s always about how you interact with brain stuff in the now. This is a revolutionary alternative to try and fix the past/future. Clinging to this mind made sense of personhood with a history is exhausting to put it nicely. However, there’s a lot of fear to let go of all those narratives to just be present. Currently, I would have to make it a choice to be present and somehow, it feels wrong.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks, Rithvik! Have fun exploring presence as something that can be easy. There is lots of fear when we step in a different direction than the one we're accustomed to.
@Locut0s
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you as always for the amazing material Mark. As I make the same journey you took I'm learning so much about myself, the world, and how to more healthily interact with both. This way of understanding myself and the world, with a much more internal locus of control turns out to be such a more compassionate way of viewing myself and others. Perhaps that is just a side effect of the love and compassion kick I've been on of late since amping up my meditation and other self care routines? I don't know but I think it IS true. I've slowly come to realize that I've misunderstood love and compassion all of these years. Especially as it pertains to myself, but by extension of that to others then too. Love and compassion, self or otherwise, is so much more of an active thing than I once thought. And so much more in my control, something that I really CAN give to myself. I used to believe that it was a passive trait that I received or "gave", but no it's a series of actions I choose to perform and as such isn't actually well correlated with how I FEEL in any one moment. I can choose to be kind and to love myself even if what I FEEL is the opposite. Even if I FEEL like I hate myself I can notice that and choose actions that I know don't fit that. Also I've realized that compassion and love is not at all an easy thing, indeed perhaps it's not supposed to be. That loving both myself and others is precisely about loving and treating with kindness those parts that are NOT beautiful and NOT "easy" to love.
@Ryy22
3 жыл бұрын
I dont have twitch, only us youtube. Please please please post your twitch streams on youtube as well!!! Thank you for all the good work youve been doing, sending you lots of love bro
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I will post some here when some interesting clips come up.
@12bjarnib
3 жыл бұрын
This is in human term called ambition. In my case this helped a lot when doing ERP for my OCD (with attitude ). I was good at sports and this is the that mindset I always had and know have regained. p.s your videos helped a lot to.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad you've found the videos helpful!
@ronnychristenjoyer6778
3 жыл бұрын
You smart, smart man. This makes a lot of sense.
@sarahrenee6061
3 жыл бұрын
I've been watching your old videos and happened to check if you had any new ones out and I barely even recognize you with the beard lol it does look great on you. Your videos have helped me.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I'm glad you found the old videos useful. Now it's just a channel about my beard :D
@mahashrayasundararaman1562
3 жыл бұрын
Beards and science is a wonderful combo
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
It's a whole industry!
@Silent_Spaces
3 жыл бұрын
Hi Mark. These lab sessions are a great addition to your output. Keep them coming! I agree that changes in brain chemistry do not make us do compulsions and that a chemical imbalance theory is too simplistic to explain why we feel what we feel but it is also true that certain drugs drastically change our baseline emotional state, making it far more likely that we experience anxiety/intrusive thoughts. One notable example would be MDMA which makes many users, who previously never claimed to have problems with anxiety, suddenly experience panic disorder. Given what we know of its pharmacology, the most likely explanation is adverse changes in the serotonergic system. How permanent these changes are is still not clear but I have seen people's personality drastically change after even short periods of MDMA abuse. So a trauma (which may be due to chemical alterations/imbalance) can precipitate the emotional pain that fuels the compulsions. Would you agree with this?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I would not agree that's the most likely explanation. MDMA is also being used in therapy now and there's a growing body of research around positive benefits. What I'd say is more likely, is similar to a recent study on soldiers going to war that did mental health assessments before and after to better understand who would develop PTSD. And what they found was that the soldiers who had poorer mental health skills before--avoidant behavior around emotions, lack of focus, issues with anger, controlling, obsessive, etc--were more likely to struggle with their mental health after a traumatic event. What seem like quirks and just "part of my personality" is a set of habits we use to manage uncertainty and unwanted experiences. When that set of habits doesn't scale to an experience we're having, then we end up in a distressed state. Absolutely, a drug like MDMA is altering the serotonergic system, but whether you have the skills and supports to handle that experience, or you're coming to that experience with a very unhealthy set of skills, is going to lead to different outcomes. The traumatic event is the point at which we're required to put our available set of tools into play. This is the same thing we see with drug experiences and depersonalization / derealization, as was mentioned in the video.
@rep956
3 жыл бұрын
Hey :) So, this actually made me think of some things I'd been doing. Just like the example of building a relationship and wanting to have the feels, would it be avoidance and compulsive to want to avoid people, avoid doing what you love, avoid "starting" that thing you want to start because of a whole array of things (feeling inadequate, looking drained, not feeling good about who you are, not being "ready yet") Is this a typical ocd thing, or is this something that people do that could lead to more of these behaviors in the future? "I'll finally start doing such and such ONCE I have gotten this done.. once I am this way, once I feel like this." Thank you so much, loved the lab!
@KoolestDudeNTheBlock
3 жыл бұрын
Hey Mark I really appreciate and love your videos to help us better our Mental Health. Yesterday I had a pretty bad mental and physical compulsion episode which involved my new phone. Lol. Thought I had bent it. The problem is I kept checking and bending it a little to see if I really had and of course by doing that I'm leading to the risk of actually bending it. Long story short I went on to other compulsions which led me to complete frustration. It sucks because I feel like I've made progress and I feel like a failure. A relapse I guess. Anyways I'm calm now but man was it hard to be in that state of mind again. Hope to hear your thoughts on this thanks Mark
@danieldooley1868
3 жыл бұрын
Mark , I’m currently very worried about getting an eating disorder as ive heard they’re linked to ocd , this is upsetting me greatly as I’m only young , it’s very difficult and I want to know how to get past this please respond
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Fears about illnesses are very common. This type of fear is what this video is about though. Seeing an eating disorder as something that just happens to you is an example of an external locus of control. Instead of seeing it as something that happens to you, this could be a great time to recognize that mental health is about how we interact with experiences and how we make choices. You can develop useful mental health skills and building mental health and fitness. It's just like building great physical fitness. It's an opportunity to do something awesome. It doesn't have to be about fear and placing fear in charge. You're in charge.
@debmalkin7411
3 жыл бұрын
Is it only my internet making the audio jumpy and stop and start?
@debmalkin7411
3 жыл бұрын
Yup, cleared up now.
@sanjaydutt5766
Жыл бұрын
HI mark i have heared from many spiritual gurus that we should not "try" to be present what do u think should i try to be present?
@francoroldan5655
3 жыл бұрын
Hi Mark! Do you know Michael Greenberg's blog? He says that practicing mindfulness is a way of engaging with thoughts and that ignoring your thoughts is a better way of getting rid of them. It reminded me of your video "How to deal with intrusive thoughts". What do you think? P.S. I love your videos
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks, Franco! That does NOT sound like mindfulness at all. It's like saying that weightlifting is about dropping weights on your feet, so a better way is to lift weights. The "How to deal with intrusive thoughts" video is explaining ACT concepts and how to apply mindfulness. One way I find useful of explaining mindfulness is that: you do the thing you're doing. Like in that video, the focus is on what you value. I have several videos on not engaging with or labeling brain stuff. All of those are explaining the practical application of mindfulness in everyday life. I am just about to start my morning meditation and I certainly have no plans to engage with any brain stuff.
@youcefbenali8328
3 жыл бұрын
Please I'm suffering from sexual OCD and I have a strong hyperawareness of a part of my body " the buttocks", and when the hyperawerness comes I start having bothering sexual thought and I don't know how to deal with this, thank you so much for all your advices
@0lagunjujuwon680
3 жыл бұрын
Bro, fuck it ignore it. I know it's hard but ignore it by considering how it stops you from living. Live at any cost should be your motto. At any cost
@Sap0105
11 ай бұрын
Do you have any analogy to deal with self centric, egoistic people who don't care about others but there behavior affect our mental health.
@everybodyhasabrain
11 ай бұрын
No, sorry. I don't know what you're looking for in an analogy there. It sounds like communication and boundaries might be more useful.
@Sap0105
11 ай бұрын
I mean people who have narcissistic traits. They are my family member so hard to ignore, Once you told in some live stream about rocks in cookies, I can't find that particular live stream. It is hard to deal with them, I have maintain boundaries, communication is not possible with them they know only fighting and arguing. I just want my reaction to there behavior in my control and to keep myself sane.
@alphawavesready6639
3 жыл бұрын
Mark I was listening to a podcast about negotiations and he said something about "paranoid schizophrenic" and not thinking things through that it basically triggered a whoosh of fear in me and i cant stop ruminating if im going crazy or about to be schizophrenic. I struggled with HOCD. How can I recover quick from this?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
You can cut out the compulsions. Fears about sexuality and psychosis are the exact same fears: that you'll lose control of being yourself. There are likely lots of compulsions you're doing around fears of not being yourself, of being perceived as somebody you're not, as controlling what others think about you, etc. You can cut out those compulsions. How quick you do that is up to you.
@stephaniemoura9325
3 жыл бұрын
So, I recently found your videos and I've been cutting out compulsions, I get very anxious and headache and episodes of crying. But I started to see that I have compulsions in soo many areas of my life I never thought I had. I started looking for OCD thinking I had Pure OCD. But anyway the realisation of the OCD in other parts of my life that I didn't think was affected by OCD is making me doubt if we can ever recover from it at all, how can I know if the called recovery is not actually just another OCD obsession for being healthy and not expending energy on bad thoughts. Do you know what I mean? Maybe just the fact that I want be sure about recovery being and actual recovery is just another obsession, but this time with recovery. How to not fall in this trap? Of cutting out obsessions and falling into others
@stephaniemoura9325
3 жыл бұрын
I'm starting to doubt if my trial to accept uncertainty became just another compulson...
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
It's very common to turn recovery into a new compulsion. We were just talking about this today on a livestream on Twitch. It could be useful to check that out. It's all about setting mental health goals for the new year that are healthy and don't just turn into new compulsions: www.twitch.tv/videos/856491787
@stephaniemoura9325
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain thank you for your videos and for all the help 😊
@Ray-ww7qo
3 жыл бұрын
Hi Mark, How would you help someone who felt if they were anxious or having anxious thoughts, they couldn’t enjoy life alongside those feelings... ?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
I would work with them on cutting out the compulsions they're doing around totally natural human experiences like anxiety. Believing you can't live life alongside emotions or thoughts is like saying you can't live life in a room that has green wallpaper. It's like buying a train ticket from Point A to Point B and then going to the train and seeing that you don't like the upholstery on the seats so you don't board the train. You put a totally random, irrelevant experience in charge of how you live life. It's not very useful.
@christophegenbrugge6815
3 жыл бұрын
Hi mark, is it normal to have anxiety attacks during act and erp?:) i keep pushing trough and after the attack the thoughts are less, i answer my brain during the attacks with the word "maybe". After that a new question immidiatly pops up and i answer the same way until anxiety subsides. What do you think of my aproach? Greets. :)
@bellelee5268
3 жыл бұрын
Hi Mark i’m an OCD sufferer and I need your help so desperately :( recently, i have one question in my head. Everytime i read about OCD, it seems like the obsession comes as a form of doubt or uncertainty. But my thoughts are like this : “ i’ve committed a sin. I must repent.” So my thought is not doubt or uncertainty. It is a form of conviction. And i can think of many reasons why this is a real sin. So I’m worried if I ignore that thought, i might really committed a sin. So my question is “ Can obsession come as a form of conviction? And should i ignore that conviction? And is it an obsession even if i can think of many reasons why it is true?” And i’ve read many many articles and books about ERP, and the treatment for OCD. and here is my conclusion “ If i feel anxious about swimming, i must swim, because i feel anxious about it.” Is my conclusion right? And Mark, you’ve really helped me a lot. I always appreciate your works and helps.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
It sounds like you're getting stuck on the word definitions here. Something I found helpful was recognizing that mental health is about spending time and energy on things I want to spend it on in life. So whether you see something as an uncertainty or a conviction or a desire or a fear or whatever, it's just about: is it useful to be spending time and energy in life chasing this around? And NO, to your question about anxiety and swimming. I wouldn't agree with that. That's still putting anxiety in charge of your life. There's actually a story in my book about that very thing. It's about a boy who sticks his head in a tiger's mouth because it made him anxious. The tiger ate him. So like I was mentioning in response to the first question, it's really useful to build around things we want to be doing in life. Whether anxiety is there or not, whether uncertainty or conviction or boredom is there or not, whether images of donuts are there or not, is really irrelevant. I'm going to do actions that take me in a direction I want to go in life.
@theboogie_monsta
2 жыл бұрын
Check out the interviews with Michael J Greenberg on the OCD Stories. He would suggest that you are still ruminating - the anxiety is coming from your compulsive rumination. And you need to stop doing that. His interviews are great because they explain how to actually do this. His website also has a lot of articles.
@ROHANKUMAR-oi6bw
3 жыл бұрын
Hi mark I just have another question. I am trying to live in uncertainty but thoughts about my old therapist and differences we had come up and I keep wondering why we had different opinions and I keep obsessing on the things we had disagreements on such as me grimacing. When these thoughts come up should I just live with the uncertainty as to who was right or wrong and as to why I was grimacing? I just think like what if he was actually right and why we had disagreements and I think what if this is something I should really worry about and i just am wondering whether i am doing things right. I am just wondering how to approach these thoughts.Sorry if you are annoyed by my questions, thanks again
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
This is the same question you just asked last week on another video. And you responded to the question yourself by reminding yourself that you'd asked the same question many times before and you know not to keep checking about this stuff with therapists and grimacing and so on. This is the compulsion. You can see that it's taking up time and energy in life. And you can see that chasing certainty about this and doing these compulsions isn't resolving anything. So what would you like to give this time and energy to instead?
@ROHANKUMAR-oi6bw
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain ok I won’t keep chasing certainty about this and will see that me wanting certainty about this is the compulsion and problem. I will try to put my time into healthy activities such as exercise and friendships. Thanks again for your help I really appreciate it
@ROHANKUMAR-oi6bw
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain i just have one last question, sometimes i get into an argument in my head or the thoughts last longer then just a second. Should i just focus on tackling the compulsions and doing my values and the thoughts will take care of themselves. Thanks
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Are there other options? Why would you want to do compulsions instead of things you value doing in life?
@ROHANKUMAR-oi6bw
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain yeah I would prefer to do values rather then compulsions, should I treat the question as a compulsion and instead do things I value then?
@soraoana4520
3 жыл бұрын
I Have osd harm and is very hard form me i dont Haven trust in doctors i will recover but i dont want to die but this fear is to big always If If If If If If If If i do this but i dont want and sometimes try to Make me to do...i need help but i dont know where to get 😭😭😭😭this keep me blokated in my room dont live my life i am very scared:(
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
You can leave your room!
@gurdevsingh5637
3 жыл бұрын
How is the winter in Canada?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Always good.
@reuvenmats6570
3 жыл бұрын
Hello mark i have a question Do you think marijuana smoking (common use) can be a barrier to recovery in the long term?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
If somebody is using it as a compulsion to avoid/control things they dislike, then I would expect it to fuel more things they dislike, and they might want to do even more compulsions around those things, too, since that's what they've been practicing. But it's not a problem with the thing, but why and how the person is trying to use the thing.
@reuvenmats6570
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain thank you
@wutru20
3 жыл бұрын
Quick question.. i am suffering again. Didn't suffer for 2 months witht the technique of letting go and accepting uncertainties. But i play the clarinet, and am constanly listening if i sound right. And if it doesnt sound right ill change reeds, blame the clarinet etc etc. How to deal with this? Because this problem wasnt there. The clarinet helped me recover from ocd, but now it is turning into an ocd thing.. thanks and happy holidays.
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Checking and controlling compulsions naturally create more of whatever it is we're trying to check on and they warp our perception. That's why, for example, the more I checked the stove to be certain it was turned off, the more I doubted it was actually turned off, until I was just stuck staring at it. This is the same effect at work in body dysmorphic disorder. The more somebody is checking and controlling to get a body part "right", the more convinced they are that it's wrong. You've posted about checking compulsions before, so you can see this effect at work. One thing I would look at is that you mentioned not "suffering". Suffering or not does not mean we've cut out compulsions. In fact, it helped me to recognize that I liked a lot of compulsions and chased them on purpose. Wanting the clarinet to sound "right" and then doing things to check and control that is an example of a compulsion that probably seemed like a useful thing to pursue. But it's just the same pattern you can see creating problems in other areas of life. It's not that there's a problem with the clarinet, it's about changing how you approach it and not making it about practicing more compulsions.
@wutru20
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain okay, thank you. I will try to do this. But when playing an instrument, everyone is tryint to sound the best they can.
@wutru20
3 жыл бұрын
Im even thinking of quitting the clarinet because it is such a huge frustration source right now.. and the thing is that im really sad about this all, because i used to love it
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
@@wutru20 But the clarinet isn't creating the problem. Why not just quit the compulsions and keep the clarinet? This is where the locus of control comes into things. It's about recognizing that we're the ones creating the problem, not the object we're engaging in compulsions around. You might also find it helpful to revisit those beliefs you're holding onto about music and how one does sound great. It's not going to be about doing compulsions, because you've probably begun to notice that excessive controlling ends up making things not sound great and then you end up not playing, which is certainly the complete opposite of making music.
@F255123
3 жыл бұрын
Is the Discord still able to be joined?
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
Yes! discord.gg/D9PmyZT4
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
That link will work for the next 24 hours
@F255123
3 жыл бұрын
@@everybodyhasabrain Thank you! You've probably heard this a million times but everything you do is so helpful, thank you for doing this!
@everybodyhasabrain
3 жыл бұрын
@@F255123 THANK YOU!
@mikebucur8461
3 жыл бұрын
Excellent video Mark. Unfortunately materialism and atheism lead to a pessimistic outlook on life. Thats my opinion. Science has helped us a lot but also caused many problems for us.
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