A two-part reflection on how I became indifferent to a destructive cluster B parent, examining the transformative processes children of malignant households go through between our birth into psychological chaos and our eventual departures. Names altered for anonymity.
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0:00 an uninteresting death
1:17 intense vs non reactions to death
2:33 to feel or not to feel
3:16 the road to indifference
4:27 defining cluster B
5:57 unfiltered individuals
6:16 masked individuals
7:21 ‘the imposter’
8:30 damage
9:43 parents vs anti-parents
10:52 growing up on a minefield
12:03 the infant brain
12:24 symptoms of damage
14:59 the misguided enabling parent
16:24 the accusations that didn’t take
17:11 discovery
17:19 burst of insight vs slow realisation
18:01 blocking our own discovery
18:27 a false benevolent image
20:09 two-faced
22:06 judgemental
23:02 envious
23:30 vain
24:20 delusional
26:26 cruel
28:39 eureka experience one
29:21 eureka experience two
30:33 the enabling parent seesaw
32:18 a patchwork parent
32:55 into defence....
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subtitles
Russian: Sergey Savelyev
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references and reading
Dentale, F., Verrastro, V., Petruccelli, I., Diotaiuti, P., Petruccelli, F., Cappelli, L. and Martini, P.S. (2015) Relationship between parental narcissism and children’s mental vulnerability: mediation role of rearing style. International journal of psychology & psychological therapy, 15 (3) pp.337-347
Fox, N.A. and Shonkoff, J.P. (2012) How persistent fear and anxiety can affect young children’s learning, behaviour and health. In Social and economic costs of violence: workshop summary. National Academies Press.
Perry, B.D. and Szalavitz, M. (2017) The boy who was raised as a dog - and other stories from a child psychiatrist’s notebook. Basic Books, New York.
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Негізгі бет my cluster B parent died and I felt.... nothing much (1/2) [cc]
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