People reveal who they are when they don’t need you
@lemostjoyousrenegade
Жыл бұрын
"People leave traces of who they are, you're just not picking up the signs." WORD!
@Lubna.Candid
Жыл бұрын
❤
@haliec496
Жыл бұрын
My therapist explained to me that it wasnt that i lack self awareness, i lacked discernment. I give people to many benefits of the doubt. I have worked hard to listen to my gut know and watch actions. Now i have a completely different circle.
@69LOLIN
Жыл бұрын
“I would say that patterns don’t lie” Be aware! 😮
@m.f.richardson1602
Жыл бұрын
I'm a people watcher. Still do. My older aunt to say "Learn how to Read people" Thank you
@shanti888
Жыл бұрын
Pay careful attention to who people really are, not to what they want you to believe.
@Marco-yj2tl
Жыл бұрын
People with no self awareness wouldn’t become aware to watch a video like this…they remain without awareness
@durjoyb1282
Жыл бұрын
People who want to be self aware will watch this video and go on to improve their life, leaving this behind.
@radioog6945
Жыл бұрын
Facts
@radioog6945
Жыл бұрын
@@durjoyb1282facts
@darkshorteditzz6485
9 ай бұрын
Well said
@Marco-yj2tl
9 ай бұрын
@@durjoyb1282 if you are not aware of the fact awareness even exists, how can you even conceive to look for it? It’s like looking for something we don’t even know exist, or even we don’t have the idea of the idea of existing
@shannonshannonbobannon5040
Жыл бұрын
I really appreciate how these videos don’t have some long unnecessary intro.
@thaboulevard8686
Жыл бұрын
It's interesting how many people automatically take this to dating or in the context of intimate relationships. This is a skill that is useful in all areas of life. The ability to walk away from people is a skill to master. Toxic people are draining. People have been taught monsters are hideous when in fact monsters are often beautiful, that is how they lure people in. The key is learning to listen to actions in comparison to the words they use, toxic people love to be victims, they love to isolate in various ways, always trying to nitpick or if they take offense when you meant none. Again, this is not just about love, but co-workers, friends, a boss, and even family members. The greatest defense is to know you can walk away from anyone. The only expert on you is you, Be cool.
@ndhtyu
Жыл бұрын
True dat
@julianagregori5888
5 ай бұрын
On point
@Andrew-zr1jt
2 ай бұрын
Great explanation , thanks.
@jamieanitabryant3699
14 күн бұрын
Great summation! 💯%
@bharathchand8670
Жыл бұрын
These lines are wise observation - "They've learned to disguise themselves. So, really toxic people have learned since an early age that if they just simply display their ugly behaviour, they'll turn off people. And so they learn to be charming. And they learn to be kind of seductive".
@face2799
Жыл бұрын
So true, I dealt with a female who I thought was very kind and sweet. I got love bombed in the beginning. I let my guard down and this girl discarded me multiple times. I gave her 2 extra chances and she threw me out of her life over and over.
@iLilith11
Жыл бұрын
That happens when you are stupid 😂😂😂
@gameprey1777
Жыл бұрын
Damnn I thought you were my ex
@Ytdeletesallmycomments
4 ай бұрын
You didnt do it once either...😂😂😂
@craigmerkey8518
Жыл бұрын
Really great information. While no one can be perfect there is a distinct line regarding manipulative and toxic behavior. As someone who has been a behavior specialist for 3 decades I remind people that acting surprised or "offended' by ongoing behaviors is reinforcing and enabling. We recognize the patterns in art, music, design, the weather and may other parts of life. Behavior patterns are the same. Words are not deeds, be aware your alignments!
@carladossantos1142
Жыл бұрын
Craig, thank you for this info! How do I become a behavior specialist? I am a teacher, but this field has always fascinated me. It's so important to know human behavior, it'd spare a lot of trouble in our relationships!
@kotic007
Жыл бұрын
A lot of successful people are obsessive - and that's why you should never judge people by their outside and on their character/habits. When you lack the self awareness to notice yourself - especially if you are obsessive, overly passionate, compulsive, afraid - you can't integrate dark portions of your character and work on things that simply do not fit you or work for you.
@toomylight2311
Жыл бұрын
It’s all about a person’s actions at the end of the day !
@Kev80ification
Жыл бұрын
It's true, to a point. In my profession I've seen ppl do bad things and never do them again for some ppl really make the effort to change. I'm not saying ignore the red flags of past mistakes but just note that we have all done things we are not proud of and they don't define us for the rest of our lives, if we make the change.
@samk.4158
Жыл бұрын
This right here. There are instances I've experienced where people stop something, or atleast don't outright do something when it's brought to attention or possibly if they are told something is wrong. Not everyone obviously there are definitely bad characters out there who do everything all the time, but I've experienced instances of somebody doing a "bad thing" once or a couple times only
@DarinDmarkovic1
Жыл бұрын
I remember when I realized my ability to read people. That's not something anybody taught me.
@vfree4579
Жыл бұрын
WOW I'M STILL LEARNING TO NOT IGNORE OR DISMISS GUT LEVEL REACTIONS
@mcdaici
Жыл бұрын
in a way people do teach u that, by giving u the circumstance like a toxic environment. But its ur accomplishment to see and understand what is happening.
@PureSparkles22
Жыл бұрын
1:25 when ppl show you who they are the first time believe them - Maya Angelu
@jonathanmun4180
Жыл бұрын
Hardest thing to see in life is yourself. Life's most distracting noise is silence. Life's greatest illusion is innocence.
@JamilaJibril-e8h
5 ай бұрын
We are all bad in someone's story so we move on
@whiterussianwhiterussian2261
Жыл бұрын
Yes I’ve learned this lesson thank you for your knowledge on this matter… if they show you something believe them the first time ❤
@kresivarivkah612
Жыл бұрын
Pravda!
@ybwang7124
Жыл бұрын
it's common sense but yeah. If you see a cockroach there's already thousands under the floor
@sharoncranwell3830
Жыл бұрын
I love this!! It's so true
@bekit7131
Жыл бұрын
All of the years of abuse, conniving, backstabbing, bullying & crap from other people has made me hate this world. No matter how much you adapt. No matter how much you try to understand these difficult people & try to work with them etc. They hate you more & want an excuse to abuse you.
@hate.doublespeak991
Жыл бұрын
Stay away from them. I have.
@gayanngodfrey2824
Жыл бұрын
Heal dear and stay away from bad people
@eyeswideopen7777
Жыл бұрын
Sometimes you got to experience contrast to experience better things
@zazagabora2
Жыл бұрын
He is a genius.
@geraldbronco870
Жыл бұрын
The real problem is that I label my parents ‘toxic’ but now as a father of a boy and a girl I can see same traits in myself. Hence, I see my son checking grounds whenever he speaks to me. He is 4,5 and we only had one conflict. From that point on he became much more cautious. And it is so painful.
@tammy6452
Жыл бұрын
Listening and applying what I hear on his videos has already stopped me from making some of the same errors over that I have done so many times in the past. I'll listen because it is sinking in.
@janetpattison8474
Жыл бұрын
I find your examples of inflexible, ego driven control freaks right on. One family person attacking me in a wide variety of ways, just goes off the deep end, hysterical, if I try to discuss the issue. After years of putting up w/ it, I give up, since the attacker has zero ability to step back and be honest Re. Name calling, insults, ghosting, rage & more.
@newyorksharelovenewyorksha951
Жыл бұрын
“People leave traces “ watch it !!!
@samk.4158
Жыл бұрын
Sometimes people do change if you set boundaries. I agree there are a lot of people who shows signs and it's a GOOD indicator of their character but there have been moments where people have changed when they become aware OR you put your foot down.
@alltnorromOrustarNorrland
Жыл бұрын
If u want to attract honest & good people: be one. “It takes one to se one” - if u are a good/honest/healthy mind; u will se others who are as well. And u will detect the fake ones 🐺
@heavenlywarning
Жыл бұрын
*Thank you for such great video. Hope to see more from you. Much appreciated! 💪*
@serahloren4643
Жыл бұрын
Yes I agree - I am learning this now and watch out for this behaviour 😊
@Yuuki-PUREI
Жыл бұрын
I think my father is a toxic person. He is very charming, but behind that he often gaslights my mother. My father was anti-critic, every time we criticized him, he would get angry and physically abuse my mother. And it happened for almost 40 years of marriage. 😢
@clairejohnson6522
Жыл бұрын
Narcissism possibly. They make everyone miserable.
@MyLifeAsRaphael
5 ай бұрын
Wow. 😮
@animatedblueproductions
Жыл бұрын
Try dealing with a solicitor that's supposed to defend a case you're in, only to find out that later on, they were delaying your justice this whole time simply cause they just don't like you for being yourself and setting boundaries.
@mangoMango-ck3et
Жыл бұрын
one time,years ago I over heard my sisters talking to my adult daughter,,,say "our brothers are weak men"....I really wish I was a strong brother,father...but I'm not..
@taniagil3122
Жыл бұрын
Helpful. Thank you !
@vach533
11 ай бұрын
Absolutely agree :,Look on the real actions !
@kellyyork3898
3 ай бұрын
My mechanic said it’s not a good idea to have your front end aligned too much because bending the metal makes the metal weaker. I might add to that: if you’re working for a boss who criticizes you a good bit for no reason and seems to be an idiot himself, you need to change jobs and not feel that you are the problem when your boss is actually the problem.
@julierobinson8173
Жыл бұрын
People are fooled because they want to believe in the fantasy of people in order to feel good about their own lives...we do this with celebrities and are amazed when their true selves emerge in chaos...show business sells us this lie about famous people and we buy it 😮
@Big_Steve11
Жыл бұрын
I do have a lot of toxic behaviors that I need to get under control; I gossip, I lie, I complain, etc. I need to become a better person
@musical_lolu4811
Жыл бұрын
Oh shit, now I'm scared of myself.
@michhall0103
Жыл бұрын
Yeah the Person I was dealing with found out he's a Textbook Narcissist. No ability to Self Reflect, or as this video said Self Awareness, No Empathy, No Genuine Care for Anyone Other than himself. Worst Person ever to be involved with
@shankarbalakrishnan2360
9 ай бұрын
True im careful I can't be used❤❤ if it's ur algorithm please spare yourself of the trouble I will catch u good luck not directed at u rob❤❤
@streaming5332
Жыл бұрын
I appreciate the voice in these videos. It's not some hard edged woman with over glammed hair and too much make-up
@shanti888
Жыл бұрын
The writing is on the wall
@maryt7959
Жыл бұрын
I have been watching those people that you are talking about for a very long time …… patterns don’t lie , they just tell you who those people are …. Toxicity as in a nuclear bomb . There are tons of them out there unfortunately!!!
@julierobinson8173
Жыл бұрын
Look for the wizard behind the curtain 😉
@axiomaddict
Жыл бұрын
I Do think that people say what they mean. And mean (by their actions or lack thereof), what they don’t say. It looks like this; Person # 1: Hey Friend, I have to cancel for tomorrow. Can you do it Sunday instead? Person # 2: Sure. I am going to be at such and such a place on Sunday from 1-5 pm socializing. You can join me. I’m running errands before then. Person # 1: Oh, it sounds like you’re busy. Maybe another time instead. Person # 2: Sure. Contact me when your schedule is free. Can you smell the bs? There’s both projection and a lack of follow up on the part of Person # 1. And is an example of the excellent admonition that “Nobody does anything once.” This exchange just happened between myself and someone else a short while ago.
@emotown1
Жыл бұрын
Actually when I read that exchange I thought person #2 was giving person #1 the brush off. So , hardly surprising pers #1 gave up the initiative of reestablishing contact. Person #2 should have responded with “Actually Sunday is going to be tricky, because (reasons),. I’m so sorry about that, but why don’t we have another try next week? I’ll get back to you about when I’m free next week, ok?” Of course, that’s with no knowledge of what person #1 ‘s previous form is.
@siobhanstrauss8492
Жыл бұрын
They do if they have self awareness.
@JJNow-gg9so
Жыл бұрын
DJT...🤮...
@JJNow-gg9so
Жыл бұрын
God, that felt good🙏.
@-_-_-_-_-...
Жыл бұрын
I love Robert Greene but I don't agree the statement that nobody does anything once. Sometimes it only takes once for someone to know they don't want to do it again.
@petrasworld913
Жыл бұрын
It's true but that is the exception to the rule.
@DMJMC
Жыл бұрын
I will not do “that”again .No exception that’s the rule !
@Anna.Destiny1137
Жыл бұрын
A more powerful way to impress the subconscious mind is saying it in a constructive manner, such as: "I'll remember to avoid making that mistake". There's something magnetic how we can phrase our statements sounding less negative that's more impactful; the conscious mind picks up that stronger pull or charge, which signals the subconscious mind to organize it accordingly. Our brain is quite amazing and mysterious. Anyone can look this up, I forgot the person who teaches these psychological tips.
@pearpo
Жыл бұрын
It is not that one cannot change. But they are who they are and most people in most instances are the same as who they already are.
@-_-_-_-_-...
Жыл бұрын
@@pearpo "change" requires an already established pattern as a baseline. Doing something once doesn't establish a pattern.
@TheBigdog868
Жыл бұрын
Despite all that charisma, Howard Hughes now lies in his grave without a single dime in his hand. His money couldn't save him.
@mandysimmons2769
Жыл бұрын
35 years ago, newly married, I encountered a young man ( running for local politics ) and I found him openly phony and completely full of hooey. I came home and warned my husband to stay away from him at City Hall. My husband would tell me I could not tell that from 5 minutes of observing that dude ( it was 55 minutes ) that he was a skunk. I said yes I can! Just a few years ago, the Eff Bee Eye finally caught up with all the crap the guy did and he's out now from a club Fed. Now, my husband will listen to me about miscreant's character.
@curlew-3592
Жыл бұрын
I think people need to learn to understand the autistic spectra lot more. Howard Huges being an excellent example to start with!
@hannahb3854
4 ай бұрын
My favourite neighbour ‘Jude’ is toxic as hell and I saw it from day one
@trusound170
Жыл бұрын
Saying no one ever does anything once is not accurate. Second, the people you describe are likely displaying the poor effects of some adverse childhood conditions, events or treatment. It is best to avoid people who display these traits that are inevitably abusive, deceptive or manipulative, BUT it is also wise to understand why people are the way that they are so YOU don't decide that YOU are the problem. No one does anything for no reason. And further, if you are in a cycle of ending up with these types you need to look at your own underlying issues and why you are drawn to or are drawing that to you.
@emotown1
Жыл бұрын
I think “no one does anything deceptive, abusive or manipulative once” is probably implicit in the title. The example of Howard Hughes’s was probably not the best as he was autistic and not seeking to deceive or manipulate. But, I have myself observed in people that any immoral behavioural trait is exactly that … a trait, not a one off.
@trusound170
Жыл бұрын
@@emotown1 I think many people have had a "one-off" under stress or highly emotional states. It is ignorant to ignore that fact.
@trusound170
Жыл бұрын
@@Toppgg-ci9er You are absolutely right. I appreciate your explanation. This is actually something I have been digging into for some time now, so your stopping by with this comment is very much appreciated.
@carol-us4xn
5 ай бұрын
Tell the truth. Not to worry, they will have to use someone else.
@kendallagrey
Жыл бұрын
i have no self awareness and it sucks. i try so hard to change, but no matter how hard i try to be kind, everyone still thinks i’m a bitch. i guess i’m fucked beyond repair.
@jasonschwier4473
Жыл бұрын
I only went skydiving once and I do not intend to ever do it again.
@mjinba07
Жыл бұрын
Why are your videos so dark?
@bernieoconnell5515
Жыл бұрын
Because that’s life.
@mikaeltsimbidakis6980
Жыл бұрын
Everybody has A weak character everyone is weak
@Dana_inc
5 ай бұрын
In my case they chose me! Because who I am! Now I am being blamed! I think not!!!!!
@inspiredomkar1239
Жыл бұрын
What does grandiose mean??
@Boomboomgiardello
Жыл бұрын
so basically people cant change at all?
@jeplica7011
Жыл бұрын
Im aware that as i wonder what the Guy is doing in the dark in the chair , self awareness and the predictable behavior of everyone i encounter lately, would be unwise to wait and see, in case it aint nothin nice
@carol-us4xn
5 ай бұрын
Believe your eyes and your gut.
@percubit10
Жыл бұрын
What di ti say about religious gaslighting.
@a.k.p7030
Жыл бұрын
Should we let them come back in our life?
@sophiarevel6952
Жыл бұрын
👍
@Shotzno
Жыл бұрын
Dude thats a bad idea lol he says a lot of very smart things but the nobody does anything once thing is kinda vague. He gives a good description but that could apply to so many things you could easily mess that up. People change. Don’t be naive but don’t be judgmental either. Which is hard.
@bernieoconnell5515
Жыл бұрын
Don’t not be silly please mask but don’t change.
@katharina...
Жыл бұрын
I agree with you, Lee. I was defending this view for most of my life, until I realised that real transformation is so unbelievably rare, it's probably not wrong to not give people the benefit of the doubt most of the time. It pains me to admit this.
@Shotzno
Жыл бұрын
@@katharina... thanks life is really complicated and yes sometimes when you attack people who are trying to get their shit together instead of just trying to come from a place of understanding you just send them into a downward spiral and it’s not helpful
@katharina...
Жыл бұрын
@@Shotzno Thank you for saying this. It's good to be reminded, every now and then, that it's important to be compassionate. I needed to hear this.
@robo1989
Жыл бұрын
Dalai Lama
@IWorkDoodles
Жыл бұрын
Untrue
@vtwintora
2 ай бұрын
then im in trouble lol
@shankarbalakrishnan2360
4 ай бұрын
Toxicity is always fined u cant achieve being drunk❤❤🎉🎉haha
@impalaSS65
Жыл бұрын
Well, to begin with, the individuals doing the draconian screening he suggests, are 50% under average intelligence, probably same about perception, and likely much less in wisdom. They are likely to have less than average self esteem, i.e. huge chip on their shoulder. Anyway, I’d suggest to take it easy, do not assume the worst, and learn not to get emotionally sucked in, because that is you letting yourself be manipulated.
@supersasquatch
Жыл бұрын
Some of the assumptions are humanist trash
@nadochamy
Жыл бұрын
I disagree with this man. because against you you also have dishonest business that revolves only around making money. and you can't judge that in the relationship either, because it always starts with phases. no one just does something is always a reason behind it. some people are distorted by their experience in life some of them become bitter and others become wiser
@jimimased1894
Жыл бұрын
ultra narrow view of people ultra narrow view of the world, ultra narrow view of skills & how they relate to people. by this logic this guy would pass on isaac newton for a science job & james brown for a funk band. straight up. what is this jibberish.
@@isaac8228 you cant generalise about people via narrow personality traits. want a genius like newton? they come directly from the negative anti-social traits mentally ill this guy is knocking. People didnt say yet "another episode screw him" they stood by the guy. want James browns funk? yeah have an unreliable impulsive drug addict in contrast to newton those same traits are why james brown is funky. want a reliable accountant or retails workers doing a job a computer could do sure.. listen to this guy. Humans are neurodiverse tribal creatures, thats our success. this doesn't reflect that a bit & is a very narrow view of where unique human skills come from. diverse & unique personalities, that cant be so easily managed or even understood by others. its real entropy in humans complexity we are not as ordered and predictable like this chap makes out.
@iamjayprakash
Жыл бұрын
@@isaac8228if you will look for bad in any person than you will not be avle to find a good or perfect person . There is nothing like perfect
@jelitabotha966
Жыл бұрын
Makes sense people are capable of changing.
@bekit7131
Жыл бұрын
Many writers are there to perpetuate the status quo.
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