This coming up on my recommended videos on the day that Bryan was awarded Alimony is NASTY WORK
@princess_maya_
8 ай бұрын
Who's here after the divorce announcement?
@Tasha-im7ox
8 ай бұрын
I'm trying to figure some things out!! What went wrong!!! I loved them together!!! So sad!!
@carmenrosa8495
8 ай бұрын
@@Tasha-im7ox what is wrong? What this …. They go away on a trip and there’s no intimacy 😢😢😢😢
@daphneymarc9420
8 ай бұрын
Watch her season of the bachelorette and it will all makes sense.
@sowande1146
8 ай бұрын
So sad for this couple, and infertility is tough. I'm hoping they are able to move onward healthfully.
@lynnterrific
8 ай бұрын
They were such a lovely couple
@changetocome100
2 жыл бұрын
There's never a time when Rachel doesnt impress me. She seems so rich emotionally and so evolved.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
How emotionally rich and evolved is she when she isn't having these conversations with her husband. She is not being mature or a good partner in her marriage.
@phuggins2798
2 жыл бұрын
@@justmemadison Rachel is obviously very direct, expressive. He knows.
@mbembaleba536
2 жыл бұрын
Because as a lawyer she went on a TV show to kiss and have sex quasi publicly and telling the whole world about it? Yeah...
@changetocome100
2 жыл бұрын
@@mbembaleba536 im confused, you hate the concept of the show or just Rachel🤔
@mbembaleba536
2 жыл бұрын
@@changetocome100 I think that Rachel girl is beautiful. I just don't understand why a woman with such education went on a stupid show like that. I'm just thinking about her father who had to see his daughter being promiscuous before the eyes of the whole world...
@Obiamajoyisrmd
8 ай бұрын
1/4/24: Just heard they are getting divorced. This video was made about a year ago. One minute in, she said things are great but could be better. Clearly, they never got better.
@thaichell
2 жыл бұрын
Finally! A woman who can voice that women who are dominant in life want to let go of that control in the bedroom. People are not all one way and I so appreciate her speaking about this.
@justcallmebon2684
2 жыл бұрын
It’s usually that way
@teresamarie7460
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel is the typical woman. They pretend to like sex to captivate the man. Once she captures him, she believes she can make him indifferent about sex. Majority of men will never be indifferent about sex and will get it from somewhere else. Her ego is too big to believe otherwise.
@bluehibiscus502
2 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤡
@justcallmebon2684
2 жыл бұрын
@@teresamarie7460 🙄🙄
@dr.jenniferma3914
2 жыл бұрын
@@teresamarie7460 Totally agree. She's using sex as power over him. I feel so bad for him. He deserves to be with someone who actually WANTS to have sex. It's clear that the sex isn't very good if it's such a chore.
@Sup_ERS_Tar
2 жыл бұрын
I admire Rachel's openness and vulnerability; we had a great conversation, and I could relate to a lot of what she said.
@michaelbenjudah3010
8 ай бұрын
Her "openness" is what led to her divorce.
@Rubrick23.
2 ай бұрын
I don't. It's clearly too much information. 😅
@Neverstopmaturing
8 ай бұрын
Who’s back after he filed for divorce and asked for spousal support to look for red flags 🚩?
@emilieiggiotti
2 жыл бұрын
I love how open and vulnerable Rachel is. Great convo and I relate about a lot of things!
@niki-maria
2 жыл бұрын
Wish I had friends with this level of sexual maturity (or just maturity in general) to be able to have conversations like these!!
@PfEMP
2 жыл бұрын
Ah yes! Find them! I am lucky to be surrounded by many. 🙏
@Mamaisthesource
2 жыл бұрын
Yes. It's attractive
@Andtherewaslight427
2 жыл бұрын
Now that you have realized you need them, you will attract them. Are you mature? Sometimes the people around us are a reflection of who we are at that moment in time. I have one friend, that I extremely have deep and freeing conversations. I walk away feeling so emancipated. I don't ask for that in any of my other friends anymore, they don't have it. But they bring other things I do need. Time is kind.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
It's not mature if you're talking about it on a public platform, but not talking about it with your partner. She should be open and vulnerable with the man she married. There are endless ways you can be intimate and show your partner how much you love them without having sex, but that can't happen because she is too afraid to tell him how she feels. That's a bigger problem than her not wanting to have sex. Her solution is to tell him to go watch porn and take care of himself. That kind of rejection must make him feel like a piece of shit. His walls will start to go up if they haven't already -- if for no other reason than self preservation. Her inability or unwillingness to communicate with the man she married is going to destroy their relationship. He loves her, but he can't read her mind. He is a grown man, he can handle his wife telling him that she is not feeling sexual. Sorry, I guess I feel some kind of way about it. lol
@Andtherewaslight427
2 жыл бұрын
@@justmemadison I love your feeling some type of way. You have brought another perspective entirely into the conversation. I am going to read your comment again. Have a lovely Sunday.
@simoneaustin8076
8 ай бұрын
… here after the divorce announcement
@aliyahharmon9045
8 ай бұрын
Girl! Me too 😭
@simoneaustin8076
8 ай бұрын
@@aliyahharmon9045she thinks she all that & a bag of chips… she must not know how miami gets down.. girls will swoop him up quick- idk who she thinks she is
@aliyahharmon9045
8 ай бұрын
@@simoneaustin8076 I'm going down the rabbit hole of their relationship and it's not looking good. I never paid attention to them after the show but they seem to be very separate people
@rachelrachel8504
7 ай бұрын
PERIOD!
@rianalafleur
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel is honestly so relatable. I can identify with everything she said
@walterbrown9079
2 жыл бұрын
#this is WB from Northeast DC here's the problem with Rachel Lindsay if you're going to quit your job as a lawyer to go on show and get you a white man and you will rejected by him and then you come back as the first black bachelorette that you act like the first female Queen Solomon and you have 30 men as your concubine and the guy that you married is a trump supporter how in the world you don't know her 🦶 in 👄 syndrome and to call Chris Harrison a racist and then to call bachelor Nation klan Nation and really got to be on her backside is that the first black couple Michelle and Nate became really the first black couple to get $200,000 to our down payment for a house they want them to be married and get that 1 million dollar check so if you're Rachel Lindsey you let your mouth got kicked out of bachelor nation and her stupidity cost her a whole lot for reputation and maybe her job on extra but they gave Billy Bush a second chance !
@carrie2971
2 жыл бұрын
Obsessed with this conversation. For the last year I have transitioned into this place in life where sex is just not on the list of things I’m interested in. I’m so self focused on my spirituality, my career, re-learning, etc. Even though I’m doing better than I’ve ever been in life, I feel this shame internally about not being as sexual of a person lately.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
It's OK to not feel sexual -- as long as there isn't a physically or emotionally issue that is preventing you from wanting to be sexual. If it's just a choice you've made, you shouldn't feel bad about it. The only other time it's a problem is if you're in a committed relationship and you are not communicating your feelings with your partner. If you're telling your partner to watch porn and take care of themselves, it's a problem. If there's no communication or attempts to find different ways to be intimate with your partner, then you're just rejecting them. Nothing good will come from it.
@ronnie-lynn
Жыл бұрын
Yes!!!!!! Wow. Thank you for this comment! You took the words right out of my mouth!
@Kaitaritz2013
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you Rachel for talking about this!! As a married woman in a relationship for 12 years, I have always felt so much pressure to say we are having sex at a high frequency. My husband and I are so busy with our two kids and jobs that sex def goes on back burner and that is OK. We are both very happy.
@PrettyAssassin
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel’s Authenticity and Relatability is simply gravitational and a breath of fresh air! The energy she exudes is infectious!
@serenabailey7722
2 жыл бұрын
Shes SIMPLY THE BEST 💞🥰🥰🥰
@Angibbabee
2 жыл бұрын
I hope Rachel and Brian had a really good conversation after she got home. This was great.
@adrianamonteiro5148
2 жыл бұрын
Masculinity must be the most fragile thing in the world, reading all these comments. She said she was super attracted to Bryan, she just worries she's not feeling sex right now. This is liberating, this is honest. The people who are so worried about Bryan's ego should ask themselves why they think he should be offended when she says all along she feels like she is the problem. If a guy says he's cheating he won't have half of these comments. Way to go, Rachel and Shan, this was refreshing to ear! ❤️
@teresamarie7460
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel is "super attracted to Bryan" but is choosing not to desire him is typical of most women who truly don't enjoy sex. A woman's ego allows her to believe she can make a man indifferent about sex. I can assure you, she cannot. I think Bryan should say: "I am super attracted to Rachel, but I just don't feel like having sex with her anymore". Then, women will understand why Rachel denying her husband sex is extremely selfish.
@dr.jenniferma3914
2 жыл бұрын
How, in a marriage, can one person decide they just don't want sex with their partner but also feel that they aren't betraying relationship in any way? Come on! This is toxic.
@suzanarehema8503
2 жыл бұрын
@@teresamarie7460 you are absolutely right.
@NileGoddess
2 жыл бұрын
And that man still loves and adores her.People can talk
@fah232
2 жыл бұрын
@@user-kq2we1ex3h Right, there's no such thing as you have to give your husband sex whenever he wants it. He have to understand the she has things going on too and may not want to/or can not do it at that moment.
@vickynyerere
2 жыл бұрын
Watching shan for the past 3 years has totally changed how I see myself as woman❤ even though I haven't found a partner that I can have certain conversations about sex without them feeling offended, I'm really happy to know myself now❤
@Thewondersofgreatnes
2 жыл бұрын
This felt like a therapy session between two friends! Great convo
@JaniceHylton
8 ай бұрын
Omg NEVER talk about your marital relations publicly.
@narlywaves2371
8 ай бұрын
😂😂 Janice!! But, you over here being nosy. 🤭👍😭✔️😁😉
@JaniceHylton
8 ай бұрын
@@narlywaves2371 Of course, I teach and write books on dating and marriage.
@lesleywiley4324
2 жыл бұрын
If this video doesn’t seal the deal with how amazing, authentic, inspiring, beautiful, gorgeous, hilarious, and real Rachel is then all them haters can go scratch. I will die on that hill. I love Rachel.
@yvonnenoel7206
2 жыл бұрын
Same, since day one!
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
It's really concerning how many women think this conversation is amazing and find Rachel to be inspiring. She is telling her husband to watch porn and take care of himself. She is not communicating with the man she committed to spending her life with -- her best friend. She said when they're together she feels like "oh no, I hope he doesn't want to have sex." It cannot feel good to be rejected like that, and to think he doesn't feel her negative energy -- it's insulting. Maybe she is real, but she is not kind or considerate of her marriage or her spouse. Maybe it's just me, but I'm not inspired in the least bit. Disappointed actually.
@user-ld6wo4rv8h
8 ай бұрын
lol why don’t you go marry her then? 😂 I hear she’s single.
@candyjamaican
2 ай бұрын
But she didn’t have a prenup!! Hahahaha not so smart huh.v
@PhoenixBlade538
2 жыл бұрын
Ah! Rachel's season of the Bachelorette is the only one I've seen and actually enjoyed! I love her! Excited to watch this convo cause you always ask the best questions, Shan :)
@TheRandomChinwe
2 жыл бұрын
haha actually ditto!
@AvecPoesie
2 жыл бұрын
Same for me...
@serenabailey7722
2 жыл бұрын
I have actually watched Rachel and Bryan season twice - I love them so much! 😍 it was the best season ever! Loved Bryan from hello for her - plus I watch everything about them here on KZitem =#BRACHEL FOREVER 🥰🥰🥰🥰
@chrisdjoseph
2 жыл бұрын
I remember during high school when a lot of my peers were starting to have sexual experiences and I felt so weird because in that season or my life I had no desire to engage in that physical activity. I thought I was asexual but really it was just something that I didn’t have a desire to do at that time in my life. Now I’m in a different part of my life and feel more comfortable with myself and body and open to sharing that with someone I’m deeply romantically invested in. I relate to the season Rachel is in. Also relate to Shan’s openess and hold space for these types of conversations. Love this so much, I pray I can work with Shan on a project one day!
@shannonceleste5557
2 жыл бұрын
I hope I get back there. I grew up and was so sexual (in a healthy way). Through trauma and drug abuse and everything else I feel like I’ve lost that part of me.
@jadacampbell9331
2 жыл бұрын
Omg same!
@carmenrosa8495
2 жыл бұрын
Most adolescents are not ready for that experience
@kimberleywilliams7802
2 жыл бұрын
demisexual then? maybe.
@k.b.8994
2 жыл бұрын
I love this! And also remember women go through hormonal changes on a monthly basis. We reset every month, men get to reset every single day! Sometimes we don’t want to be touched sexually! Sometimes we don’t feel our sexiest or hottest and it has nothing to do with self esteem or anything else, sometimes it’s the simple ebb and flow of our hormones and that ok!
@hannahb4386
2 жыл бұрын
Love this conversation ❤️ as a 23 year old in my first relationship, we have now been together 3.5 years and the newness is gone and I really struggle to be honest with myself and with him about not wanting it. Hearing 2 women i admire talk about not always being a freak in the sheets is great!!
@Impossibly_gorgeous
2 жыл бұрын
You dont owe him your body. Just say no. Let him walk if he wants to
@beckiruther1213
2 жыл бұрын
There’s nothing wrong w. visiting a marriage counselor/therapist together.
@kitejohnson515
Жыл бұрын
Are you married
@hannahb.2984
Жыл бұрын
Our profile names are so similar I thought I wrote that comment 😅
@Sunnie5561
2 жыл бұрын
I love this conversation. It’s so freeing to know you’re not alone in this feelings because who can you really have this conversation with? Back in the day conversations like this were unheard of I’m glad we’ve evolved to a place where women can share this globally and feel seen, heard, validated and understood! Kudos to both women. Don’t let anyone shame you for it!
@gogiberry9517
2 жыл бұрын
UGH Rachel Lindsay is a class act. This video made me go rewatch her season and it’s been the highlight of my week. Also, Shan, your channel has helped me and my boyfriend out so much and I just want to thank you, because as a queer woman I have honestly NEVER felt this free and true to who I am in a straight relationship, but your podcasts and videos have sparked refreshing, affirming, and thought-provoking dialogue between the two of us since before we were even romantic partners. You’re awesome :’)
@sammyytube5999
2 жыл бұрын
Love the comfort in her freedom as she discusses her sex life in such a beautiful way. And she is still just glowing in love and happiness.
@candyjamaican
2 ай бұрын
This isn’t something she should have done. Discussing your intimates with the world is NEVER a good look. Not lady like.
@catherinevanommeren
2 ай бұрын
The Divorce algorithm doing its work.
@wolympatzymwami4554
8 ай бұрын
I really love how Rachel articulates herself.....Thank you Shan for bringing her.
@ominous450
8 ай бұрын
Poor Bryan. They weren't having much sex. Fertility issues. They were living separately. Well then, what are we doing here? I don't blame him for divorce
@inhabitantofearth
2 жыл бұрын
I like that Shan is sitting in that position. It looks like a position you sit in when you're comfortable and talking to your friends. Like, you wouldn't see Oprah sitting in that position, it looks "all business" with her. Shan always talks to her guests in a way that encourages them to open up (judge-free), but the way she's sitting, probably makes them feel even more comfortable...subconsciously 🤔
@Tan87ful
2 жыл бұрын
💯💯💯
@trillviaplath
2 жыл бұрын
This was such a ridiculously dumb comparison and extremely narrow-minded in a time where people cry for space and diversity. By sheer DEFINITION, an educated TV anchor turned first-Black TV show host COULD NOT/CANNOT sit with her feet up on furniture - which is gross to some, if not improper, but inherently very casual considering the NATIONAL platform and nature of the job! Oprah is not a sexologist making money via social media. Would that be comfortable for her? Can her legs fold up? Someone advocating for open relationships is inherently seen as less judgmental than someone on primetime TV politicians, murderers, royals, celebs, Drs etc. Please. Let people do what works for them. You don't need to pitchfork Oprah down to show your appreciation for Shan!
@TeeAntoinette
2 жыл бұрын
I haven’t finished watching but I feel inclined to comment. This is so relatable. I’m so grateful for this conversation and the transparency. Thank you both for being so open and honest.
@MyVlogTherapy
2 жыл бұрын
More of these! So helpful and normalizing to have these conversations with couples who are honest and vulnerable. 🙏🏽
@S2Naughty456S2
2 жыл бұрын
I never watch the bachelorette lol but I might watch her season knowing how much I love her off the show. She’s so authentic!! I love her.
@MrsLeeWey23
2 жыл бұрын
It’s on Hulu!
@Gjfdyo5786
2 жыл бұрын
It's the best Bachelorette season out there👌, like for real.
@sashav.3189
2 жыл бұрын
@@Gjfdyo5786 I think a lot of the guys ruined it but she is perfection.
@Gjfdyo5786
2 жыл бұрын
@@sashav.3189 She got her happy ending with the one she loved,that's all that matters.🤗
@user-ld6wo4rv8h
8 ай бұрын
Poor Bryan. Their sex life was probably worse than non-existent!
@FAMOSAS11
2 жыл бұрын
I love Rachel naturally because anytime I watch and listen to her, I learn a lot from her cuz she's open and straight forward
@beverleywalker4910
2 жыл бұрын
This is why I like Rachel, she is an honest person. ❤👍🏾
@dtate001
2 жыл бұрын
I’m so happy that this conversation was had!!👏🏽👏🏽 other people’s expectation is exhausting. This is so real. I’m glad to know this is normal. This is relatable 👏🏽💜
@TruOmilade
2 жыл бұрын
PLEASE DO A PART 2 WITH RACHEL!!! Loved this.....Grown azz women having a grown azz conversation. You ladies are amazing. This elder is listening, learning and I'm so proud to be present to witness such high levels of intelligence, vulnerability, and spiritual brilliance.
@amandadevishewbaran559
2 жыл бұрын
As a big fan of Shan & of Rachel, I was soooooo excited when I got this notification!!!
@moon230686
2 жыл бұрын
Me too! I love Rachel's book!
@barbarajohnson4920
8 ай бұрын
Mmmmm!!!!.... My opinion and my opinion only. This is not ok ( to me ) to go on these platforms and discuss your private intimate sexual matters or bedroom issues with the public. Since it’s regarding her husband it MIGHT be ok if he was present and part of the conversation but to do this is NOT OK. It is not surprising that the end result is the D word. The Death of their marriage. Again, just my own humble personal opinion. Wishing them both healing and wellness as they go their separate ways. I sure hope we won’t see them bashing each other in public. I don’t see it coming from Bryan, at least I hope not.
@crystalann3766
2 жыл бұрын
I could listen to these two for hours! I love how real they are and how they are normalizing being too tired to have sex
@melodyreyneofficial
2 жыл бұрын
I love how honest this was.
@nectarina3891
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this convo! My husband is actually my first and only sexual partner and it's been a huge learning curve for me to be patient with both him and myself with things don't line up for us to have great sex all the time. For a while I took in really personal when he didn't want to and felt really guilty if I didn't too.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
Communication. Communication. Communication. Think about the times when you took it personal or felt guilty, communication could have made them non-issues. Your partner loves you and that's not going to change because you're not feeling sexual -- if they understand what's going on...even if you can't explain it, at least acknowledge it -- don't act like it's normal and hope they will not notice...they will and they will assume it's their fault. If things are not back to normal in a week or 2, consider seeing a doctor to ensure there is nothing medically wrong. In the meantime, if you're honest about what you're going through neither of you will be burdened with feelings of guilt or rejection. There are countless ways to maintain your intimacy without having sex. Hold hands or snuggle while watching a movie, cook and listen to good music, share your favorite dessert, stay up all night talking like you did when you first met, do things that make you laugh -- stay connected. Trust your husband -- he will either be instinctively supportive, he will be open to learning how to support you or he will not care what you're going through or being supportive -- in that case, you'll have to decide if that's the partner you want for life. However, it's more likely he loves you, he would hate to know you're upset or burdened with guilt and he realizes things are not always going to be fairy-tale perfect. Don't make things worse by trying to deal with it alone when it affects both of you...that's why you're married, to have a partner to go through life -- the good and the bad -- together.
@rivkathegreat
2 жыл бұрын
There's nothing wrong with not wanting sex🤷🏼♀️ it's not even a funk. It's just not a priority in that moment and that's okay. Just not feeling it is 100% a valid reason.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
She just needs to be honest with her husband. I worry about them. Not because they're not having sex, but that they are not communicating. He can't read her mind and it's only human for him to assume it's his fault. This actually shows a much deeper problem in their marriage.
@rivkathegreat
2 жыл бұрын
@@justmemadison May I just remind you that just because she shares this part of her marriage with us, that doesn't mean we know the full story. This also doesn't have anything to do with what I said. People often feel guilty or odd about not wanting sex. Doing the act of sex is not always a priority and people shouldn't feel guilty about it, that's all.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
@@rivkathegreat I agree. She shouldn't feel guilty, but she should be honest with her husband. I think it's cruel to reject someone, tell them to take care of themself and never tell them why. To put it out for public consumption...I mean, come on now. They are married...that means being on the same side, trusting each other and supporting each other. Not exposing personal details about your sex life to the world when admittedly you haven't even told your partner it's a problem. That's all.
@rivkathegreat
2 жыл бұрын
@@justmemadison If you had watched the whole video and payed attention, you would've known that she did tell her husband. To what extent, we don't know. I'm simply referring to a statement they both made, I'm not here to discuss her marriage/supposed marital problems.
@estherlindie6791
2 жыл бұрын
@@rivkathegreat rr de
@lexiloo1783
5 ай бұрын
This is a husbands worst nightmare. . TOO MUCH INFORMATION Rachel
@TheBLACKKING25
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel is literally everything 😍
@lisafoster89
2 жыл бұрын
Yes we can agree that Rachel has a good voice! I am going to purchase the book. Thanks Shan and Rachel for such a truthful, insightful, transparent conversation. Thanks, again!
@SamriBliss
2 жыл бұрын
Exactly! I was recently talking to my husband about the frequency of our sex - sometimes we go a whole month without sex and that's okay!
@mochamommyATX
2 жыл бұрын
Hey!
@SamriBliss
2 жыл бұрын
@@mochamommyATX heya Mocha :)
@chelseasunshine8590
2 жыл бұрын
This! Sometimes we have sex multiple days in a row and sometimes we go a few weeks with just a couple kisses and cuddles and that's OK. It's life and it's beautiful to have someone that loves you no matter what and that sex doesn't have to be the thing holding it together.
@dr.jenniferma3914
2 жыл бұрын
Is it though? Is it?
@SamriBliss
2 жыл бұрын
@@dr.jenniferma3914 the answer is balance.
@jeanettedombroski3934
2 жыл бұрын
I don’t personally believe you have to test the waters...if you’re in sync, in love, attracted to each other, allowing the honeymoon phase to pass, having chemistry then there is no way you won’t vibe together in bed.
@lisacox3750
2 жыл бұрын
I don't believe you do either. I think you can learn and get a sense of what the vibe will be after spending enough time with each other.
@sierra.lynette
2 жыл бұрын
such a great conversation. i’ve followed for a while, but going into my later 20s i definitely value posts like this! thank you for being consistent 💗
@deloresboudreaux2755
8 ай бұрын
It’s sad when you don’t have “ sexual chemistry. “
@tenpin2387
8 ай бұрын
Now l know why Racheal husband file for divorce, Allegedly, She said toooo much
@MultiDaisy1995
2 жыл бұрын
I really love how open an vulnerable this video was. Thank you guys
@avig8334
2 жыл бұрын
I totally agree with Rachel that sex with a partner is going to be inconsistent because that is just how life is . Many men don’t understand this concept . As she mentioned the added stress/ Anxiety of your partner wanting sex and your just not in that area.
@sarcasticidealist1309
2 жыл бұрын
but men *want it* as much as women *don't want it* ; so where would the compromise be?
@avig8334
2 жыл бұрын
@@sarcasticidealist1309 a mature man will respect the females wishes if she isn’t in the sexual space. For a duration ( how ever long or short). A relationship just built on sex will not survive any hurdle in life. She has sex on her terms.
@sarcasticidealist1309
2 жыл бұрын
@@avig8334 as a future LMFT your very wrong and any relationship started on the basis of sexual attraction will collapse without it. that was psych 101 for us.
@cherylsnodgrass8017
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel I am so happy to hear you women speak about not wanting to have sex all the time. To tell you the truth it is boring having sex too much. I'd rather cuddle then to have sex.
@davidnsarah07
2 жыл бұрын
Omg I am soo sooooo glad I stumbled upon this video, I've been waiting for a convo like this & who better to do it than this beauty 😍 YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY SPOT ON, Society sets a WHOLE ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ballpark of standards when it comes to WOMEN....Too lil sex or an issue in the bedroom and it's the woman looked at, No kids yet and it's the woman asked why/when, Not married yet and the woman is asked when/why....THERES JUST ENTIRELY TOO TOOOOOO MUCH PRESSURE PUT ON WOMEN TO DO EVERYTHING, SOLVE/ACCOMPLISH EVERYTHING, HAVE IT ALL ETC *THE LIST JUST DRAGS ON & ON* when the truth of the matter is IT SHOULD BE A 50-50 THING! Women these days are just expected to do so damn much & the pressure to do/have it ALL really takes a toll some days so lets ease up on the pressure yall!! It's nice to see yall talking bout this as it def is something that needs to be addressed & talked about more so THANK YOU for taking some time to address these things! Women are humans just like men, we have feelings, needs, wants, expectations etc & it should be up to the woman how she goes about living her life, NOT SOCIETY TELLING THEM WHATS EXPECTED OF THEM & THEN THEM TRYING TO LIVE UP TO THOSE STANDARDS SOCIETY PLACES ON US, ITS HARD MAN!! WE ARE WOMEN & WOMEN ARE HUMANS & THEREFORE SHOULD BE TREATED AS SUCH! PERIOD! I LOVE YOU GIRL STAY BEAUTIFUL!
@tammiminaj
2 жыл бұрын
Dope episode. Love the openness between them.
@lovereconciled4210
2 жыл бұрын
This was like the best interview, ever. Love Rachel for her authentic, truthfulness, and honesty.
@ruthharper2499
8 ай бұрын
I love them as a couple but I’m kind of not surprised about the divorce because Rachel seem like she really got into the Hollywood environment so much so that she put that before her marriage. I do hope the best for both of them
@candyDander
2 жыл бұрын
I appreciate how candid this conversation was. It hit home when I think about how things were toward the end with my ex.
@nadiasylvia
2 жыл бұрын
I love your honesty, thank you for discussing these issues outloud and taking the shame out of these completely normal relationship fluctuations
@AvecSeverina
2 жыл бұрын
Great conversation!! Thank you for the sexual maturity and the vulnerability 🥰
@dannid3147
2 жыл бұрын
Amen to the whole convo! You ladies hit the nail on the head. We women are tired a lot of the time and the last thing we want is sex. So men, just be patient and understanding!
@KatrinaSherokee
2 жыл бұрын
I love conversations like this. It opens my mind up to different ways of thinking etc.
@StephRussy
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel fuckin rocks! I love this vulnerable authenticity.
@LunaHealing
2 жыл бұрын
That is actually true for a lot of people, dare I say most, men and women. The more in control you are in your life the more submissive you tend to be in bed. And, the opposite is also true. Mostly for the reasons she explained. If you feel like you have to take care of, and control, everything in your life, the last thing you want during sex is to have to take on the same level of responsibility.
@michilove6554
2 жыл бұрын
For me, I'm dominant in everything, especially sex. I was a domme for years, but gave it up when I fell in love with my ex. I was still in control in the bedroom with him, but I did allow him to be in control a handful of times.
@themandinkafamily
2 жыл бұрын
Love this interview. I always loved how Rachel articulates herself so she's on the perfect show.
@msnandimarie7023
2 жыл бұрын
Yes she's good. Her college education and law degree helps in that regard. She's a great thinker and always has excellent viewpoints. I enjoy listening to her.
@dennisd.5595
2 жыл бұрын
Love the honesty of this convo. I think couples should have an open dialogue on where they are mentally and sexually. Some people go longer than a month without the desire and I think depending on the people in the relationship should broach the topic of next steps or alternative solutions. One month can easily slip to half a year when it becomes habit. Again, that's ok but should allow the space for both partners to discuss that impact on their relationship if any
@Blahgirl283
2 жыл бұрын
Well said
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
Did she say her and Brian have an open dialogue? What I heard was she hasn't talked to him about any of it. Other than to tell him to go watch porn and take care of himself. I agree, communication is what will get you through tough times together. However, I didn't hear anything indicating that's what is happening with her and Brian.
@majormomo3466
2 ай бұрын
Nasty convo with a morehouse sweatshirt on lol ngl 😂
@Christian-eq6pq
2 ай бұрын
Add one more H before O and Flip that M upside down
@tnuunt8123
2 жыл бұрын
We Neeeeeed this! This was so perfect and real. I’m not sexually active I’m waiting till marriage, and this is a very helpful guide to what I should be able to talk about with my future spouse. This sets the president for my sexual health and has to be a part of the conversations we have. I am very interested in sex and excited to finally have it but it’s also okay if it’s not 10 times a day how people claim it should. Thank you! I love myself lol I know what I require and I didn’t need someone to “teach” me anything I can’t wait to (learn with) and stop stereotypes.
@GoldenGraham25
2 жыл бұрын
Just hang in there. You’re not missing ANYTHING! I waited until I was 25 and should have kept my sex to myself, like I promised myself I would.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
You're right about talking to your partner when you do get married; however, that is not what Rachel is saying in this interview. She is making excuses for not communicating with her husband about the things she is sharing on a public platform. If she can't have the conversation with her husband in person, her marriage is in trouble and it has nothing to do with sex. She is basically saying she doesn't trust him to understand or support her or she doesn't respect him enough to tell him the truth. Instead, she tells him to go watch porn and take care of himself. That doesn't allow for any intimacy between them. There are endless ways to be intimate without having sex, but she has opted to just flat out reject him. I'm not suggesting she should deny her feelings or do something she doesn't want to, but she owes it to her husband to be honest about where she is and what she's going through.
@tnuunt8123
2 жыл бұрын
@@justmemadison I didn’t look at it from that perspective, I personally love the idea of finding intimacy every day even if I’m tired. That’s just how I was raised sex is an excellent way to revive and nurture a relationship or just plain physical touch or flirting. That’s what I truly want to put in my future marriage.
@vitoriamorenacarvalho
2 жыл бұрын
I can relate!
@mutekuro
2 жыл бұрын
@@justmemadison did we all watch the same video :/
@fah232
2 жыл бұрын
I love the fact that you and your husband are absolutely honest with each other even if you have something to say that may be hurtful. I can't stand when people say some things you should just lie about to keep from hurting the person's feelings. Just like Rachel said, it will help your relationship in the long run rather than hurt it.
@thoroughrooke9532
2 жыл бұрын
Big Rach! Incredible, vulnerable and honest as usual.
@shannonfromthed
2 жыл бұрын
I love Rachel! That season was super exciting.
@seabindlovu9531
2 жыл бұрын
My favorite on the platform. Thank you for your vulnerability and honesty. 🇿🇦🇿🇦
@marylagrange856
8 ай бұрын
I totally agree about the pressure people put on women to have children. I want to have children (I am 29) but just in a year or so and by 28 I already was getting questions about it from family and I stopped answering calls from the person that kept asking me about it. I never watched Rachael's season - I wish I did she's ana amazing person!
@deloresboudreaux2755
8 ай бұрын
I like the conversation so far, tell him what you want and expect from him !!!
@angellavolmar9596
2 жыл бұрын
Rachel is me and Im Rachel! Im so sexually attracted to my husband, but sometimes Im so exhausted and pressure to do sex that it takes me out of it! Love the conversation!
@kazi2683
2 жыл бұрын
Smoke some weed together
@flowd7451
2 жыл бұрын
@@kazi2683 lmaoo wtf
@GvannD
2 жыл бұрын
This was suuuuch a healthy and refreshing conversation. Thank you ♥️
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
I'm worried for Rachel and Brian. Not because they are not having sex, but because they are not communicating. Brian is not a mind reader and he is going to assume it's his fault. Imagine her energy if every time they are going to spend time together she is thinking "oh no, what if he wants to have sex?" That's her husband. Does she think he doesn't feel rejected as she dodges and weaves anything that might suggest she wants to have sex. Imagine how empty he must feel. By not communicating, she is eliminating any intimacy between them -- intimacy doesn't always have to be sex; hold hands, listen to good music and dance together, snuggle up for a movie, play a game, do something that makes you both laugh. You're married. There should not be so much pressure -- talk to each other. Don't make excuses to yourself about why it's OK -- it's not fair to leave your partner feeling unsettled. We've all been in an uncertain situation and it sucks. There are bigger problems in the relationship if you're too afraid to talk to your partner. Laughing about sending him off to watch porn and take care of himself -- there is nothing amusing about that at all. The levels of rejection in that one gesture...I'm sorry, but you never want to make your partner feel unwanted and dejected or not worthy of knowing what's going on. Brian loves her, he's not going to be mad if she says she's just not feeling sexual, but he is going to be really hurt if she just keeps rejecting him. You can't call him your best friend and then shut him out when you're going through something. She needs to respect him, respect the commitment she made to him and their marriage and start communicating with him. You have to be able to talk to your partner. I'm worried about their marriage.
@KtotheB1218
2 жыл бұрын
Agreed!!!!
@Blahgirl283
2 жыл бұрын
Are you married, JustMadison?
@Impossibly_gorgeous
2 жыл бұрын
Women🤦🏾♀️ he's not complaining.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
@@Impossibly_gorgeous And you know this how? You don't know what is going on in their marriage...no one has heard his side. No one knows what it's like when his wife tells him to go watch porn and take care of himself because his wife doesn't want him near her and she is telling everyone except him. If he's not complaining, he should be. If disrespect is all you're going to give to the relationship -- don't be surprised when that's what you get back...expect it.
@justmemadison
2 жыл бұрын
@@Blahgirl283 28 years
2 жыл бұрын
I loved that conversation. Authentic
@viceanterra3
2 жыл бұрын
I hate that there's this weird "standard" for amount of sex. There are so many variables involved that when it comes to sex it's impossible for there to be a standard. My wife has what she calls "seasons". She goes from not wanting any for weeks to wanting it every day for weeks. No type of consistency and this is somewhat recent. And truth be told, the extremes suck lol. Idk what's worse. I thought I'd like it every day, but I definitely don't 😩. I needs my rest. And obviously I don't like it when its been a week or more either. But Im at a point now where I would rather do literally anything else than have one side, unenthusiastic, duty sex. Duty sex is trash. All that said, I can live with the duality. I have hobbies for dry season and take full advantage of monsoon season. When it gets too much either way I just communicate and we adjust. It's a constant work in progress. There is no "standard". It's more like a dance. Ebs and flows.
@princess_maya_
8 ай бұрын
This didn't age well 😭
@lindareece4307
2 жыл бұрын
This conversation right here was EVERYTHING! Thanks for tackling the tough, but necessary and REAL conversations that need to be had around thought processes, the burden of expectations, and how we sometimes feel in response to that! Most importantly, that it's OK! ✊🏾💯💯🙏🏾
@Shayne_T
2 жыл бұрын
Pornography destroys relationships, period. It’s why men expect porn stars in the bedroom, they are brainwashed watching porn. Go see couples who don’t watch porn, they have amazing sex lives because they are open with each other, without porn, they don’t need that.
@beak2932
2 жыл бұрын
Agreed. It's also perverted watching it. You should not be peeping into people's windows to watch them having sex. That's basically what watching p0rn is. You are looking through the windows of strangers and getting turned on.
@Blahgirl283
2 жыл бұрын
Really appreciative of non-stigmatizing, loving relationships between women. Holding space for one another’s experiences whether you see yourself in them or not. Great job, Shan. Lovely to see Rachel.
@marisolarreola4006
2 жыл бұрын
I loved this a topic very needed to be talked and I agree life gets in between.It’s hard at times
@josephrocha142
4 ай бұрын
Why does this woman feel the need to talk about her private life to the world? Is anything sacred?
@Black_Rose1234
2 жыл бұрын
Absolutely love this episode. Such a great conversation, thanks for sharing ladies.
@tarapatrick532
2 жыл бұрын
This is such a great conversation. I already appreciate your openness
@orepatalaeai2642
2 жыл бұрын
The best couple in the Bachelorette..love this two.. ❤️
@RyanB_Journeys
2 жыл бұрын
Great conversation!!! This is applicable to all marriages. My wife and I are going through the same thing which is normal. Sex in your relationship will forever be ever-changing.
@donnahill2178
2 ай бұрын
I see why he was ready for a divorce and wanted to communicate via text.
@ifyogbo
2 жыл бұрын
Hey @Shanboody 😊 Can you put the quiz that Rachel mentioned in the next video? I would love to take it.
@tinacampbell6227
2 жыл бұрын
I am side-eyeing this conversation. And there are definitely some red flags. This is why I never trust anything celebs have to say.
@comelitekang8873
2 жыл бұрын
Love, this conversation. It’s so honest and it’s happening in all relationships. Thank you for opening this conversation :)
@missestomlinson99
2 жыл бұрын
the vibes of shan’s podcast are just immaculate i feel like i’m on vacation w them all the time just having good talks
@latifa1020
2 жыл бұрын
The timing of different kinds of cycles is very visible and understandable through the lens of astrology. it's easy to see which functions and activities are energized and which are in the background in the current moment. Thanks for a great show and conversation!
@tayamorales4147
2 жыл бұрын
Such a good conversation 😍 very enlightening ✨
@deloresboudreaux2755
8 ай бұрын
Conversation about everything would answer many questions !!!!!
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