When I was in active addiction I went to jail for a short while, and the one common denominator was that we were all abuse survivors. We all had severe trauma. It’s really sad. I just celebrated 8 years clean. We can recover with support.
@daysjours
2 жыл бұрын
Congrats!!
@hermesalonso3968
2 жыл бұрын
GOD BLESS YOU for your 8 yrs clean👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 keep it moving & stay strong💪
@paulh9979
2 жыл бұрын
Your story is so true, I honestly hope you are still doing well.
@jahmed9771
2 жыл бұрын
Congratulations on your clean time, ‘’ one day at a time’’ 👍
@marcisingh4023
2 жыл бұрын
@Mamma Deuces...congrats hun...keep on that path of sobriety
@Sveccha93
3 жыл бұрын
Medical student here. We've had multiple lectures on trauma, adverse childhood events, and spiritual aspects of healthcare. Things are changing.
@sierraedgar7208
3 жыл бұрын
That’s really heartening to hear, thank you! You got this!
@anonomyssymymy5115
3 жыл бұрын
Don’t lose your compassion
@lesleyhubble2976
3 жыл бұрын
I don’t think doctors have the time to sit and listen, not there fault,more money is needed
@Sveccha93
3 жыл бұрын
@@lesleyhubble2976 you know, it really depends on the doctor and the environment. I have had amazing and terrible experiences with Medicaid and "nice" insurance alike. I wish you luck and hope I can be the kind of clinician you are longing for in a few years.
@dianamary6170
3 жыл бұрын
That's so great to hear. 💞
@evasco1979
3 жыл бұрын
This is why the Portuguese approach towards drug addicts is so good. Seeing drug addicts as someone who need help, not seeing them as criminals.
@ethanbradley2796
3 жыл бұрын
Is that where they did the studies where they went around and stopped punishing people and forcing then into rigid recovery programs and instead gave them opportunities to be part of society through job training and h lo using assistance and stuff like that and like 90 percent of them ended up overcoming there addiction without being treated like a broken person but instead being treated like a valuable person?
@Stall-FedCalves
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/qaJtrmSGqX57qGU
@markheithorn3905
3 жыл бұрын
@Sérgio Nogueira Thats the smart thing to do. Here in Canada we are moving in the same direction.
@Jo-vu1me
3 жыл бұрын
What does that look like though?
@prarambharehab2749
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/kWms3KKeqYhipGU
@marksmith1074
3 жыл бұрын
1:08 hit me hard. Addiction is a response of human suffering and that broke me. I am a recovering alcoholic and it is hard staying sober. I have dealt with so much in my life and alcohol was always there for me. Never judged me and never left me. That line will forever tug at my heart strings because I felt every word like a sharp knife. I have gotten better control of my drinking. I slip up from time to time and I am trying. I have been getting better and stronger. I have been staying sober for longer periods of time and I will someday get rid of this demon. If anyone is reading this, please keep fighting the good fight. Screw everyone for judging you, even for relapsing. I'll be rooting for whoever is trying to get sober because I am in this fight as well and I will die trying to be sober.
@daysjours
2 жыл бұрын
I hope you are in AA -- it is not about fighting the good fight It is about finding the relief of surrender & the strength in numbers. Wishing you all the best for 2022 - you will put this all behind you and onward ho!
@vladimirdosen6677
2 жыл бұрын
Allan Watts, look it up
@Dapryor
Жыл бұрын
I’ve got 2.5 years clean and I was struggling today. I really appreciate your comment here.
@vladimirdosen6677
Жыл бұрын
@@Dapryor You are everything you need already my friend. You're okay.
@MrBUGS713
Жыл бұрын
Try a carnivore diet
@gatelice3854
3 жыл бұрын
My brother is currently struggling with addiction. We went through some rough times as kids. He always protected me… And seeing him in that state today makes me really sad. He took the hit for me back then. That’s why I’m not leaving his side now, I will walk this road with him by giving him as much love and support as he needs.
@austinm2121
2 жыл бұрын
I like this man. Sometimes that's all that people need when they are going through addiction, is for someone to be there by their side & to not judge them & to understand them !
@MiguelPerez-ty1vb
2 жыл бұрын
How much parents love their children and children love their parents? Have you watched the film “Lorenzo’s oil” starring Nick Nolte and Susan Sarandon as the parents of a child sick with a rare incurable brain disease who research and work incessantly to find a cure to save their son’s life? That never happened with addiction, the so called “family disease”. Not only parents and children of addicts, likewise psychologists, psychiatrists and rest of humanity, didn’t research the affliction, when just reading the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous (which the mainstream of addiction recovery programs are based on) and being honest to want to understand is enough to understand that addiction is the psychology of a liar, but silence the truth that would save their so called “loved ones”. Are you queuing in the crowded comforting lies or alone in the unpleasant truths? Do you believe addiction is an incurable brain disease that affects young healthy criminals that has never been found or detected by any biological or other means? Humanity are dying deceived deceiving living a lie because parents don’t teach their children to be honest because are not honest themselves. The truth is addiction is the tormented psychology of an unforgiving liar, drugs don’t cause addiction and only liars get hooked and only honesty gets freedom. The tragedy of addiction is children who revenge a childhood hurt, or trauma, against their parents learning from example becoming victims of themselves so as to conceal the hatred to hurt others, advertising themselves as victims stealing attention. In life like in psychology events and behaviours happen for a reason. Addiction runs in families because psychologies, behaviours, beliefs and else are transmitted from parents to children, like father like son, because humanity don’t think for oneself, otherwise there would be agreement on the truth. Hate, lie, hurt, ignorance comes from hate, lie, hurt, ignorance and addiction appears in bad families of parents who hurt their children. I am a recovering addict, a fool who knows that is a fool, a wise man. I don’t know much but i know what i know. The truth is stagnated among liars and when the unpublishable truth is published mortality rates would collapse provoking humanity’s addiction recovery, a burst of psychology, guilt, shame that was bottled up, desensitised, ignored in active addiction. The war, nightmare of living a lie would end because would be proven that you are like i impossibility possible miracle God.
@allfacts19
2 жыл бұрын
That's extremely important for you to be there for him. Learn about addiction. God bless you both.
@andrewwilliams6410
2 жыл бұрын
I'm sure he appreciates you not giving up on him, even if he hasn't expressed it verbally. I teared up when I read your comment, my brother hasn't given up on me through my addiction and that means more than the world to me. I wish the best for you and your brother, thank you.
@dontknowyusso
2 жыл бұрын
Love you for this 💪🏿
@lillith77
3 жыл бұрын
Clean for 18 months...this hit me hard...for a moment I didn't feel like an entirely hopeless human being
@bazglsgw1208
3 жыл бұрын
You have been clean for 18 months. Be proud my friend 👍
@KatherineJetton
3 жыл бұрын
Every day you don’t use is a miracle from God! He has a plan and purpose for you. Your story can help others out of a deep pit. Keep up the good work one day or one hour at a time! You’re special and loved!!
@lillith77
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you
@christieburkett1607
3 жыл бұрын
I'm so very proud of you. Keep going one day at a time. You deserve every blessing you find.
@SirUncleCid
3 жыл бұрын
21 months now, friend? Keep that shit up.
@daniellefaichney7387
3 жыл бұрын
Clean for 4 days from opiates. Longest I’ve managed in 2 years of my habit. It made me forget all my trauma until it wasn’t enough. Really excited to feel genuine happiness in sobriety, I just hope it’s one day soon. I needed to hear this video today. ❤️
@waltersobchak7275
3 жыл бұрын
Look up,song by Haystak called my first day. I don’t like rap but that song is what you need to hear trust me
@NAT-turners-Revenge
2 жыл бұрын
Cool ☺ i hope you're still on that clean road
@kathleen4376
2 жыл бұрын
So glad to hear it . I have come to accept that I am a work in progress and try and learn from my trials and tribulations . Be patient with yourself
@RaGoddessOfLoveNLite
2 жыл бұрын
Stay strong, you are unique to this earth, one of a kind, and deserving of love and great things.
@clairestrickland2513
2 жыл бұрын
I am just now seeing this post. How is it going?
@Paul_Michael
2 ай бұрын
I'm a veteran, was actually addicted to alcohol and cigarettes. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with cptsd. Not until my wife recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Much respect to mother nature the great magic shrooms.
@NetaZjdb
2 ай бұрын
Can you help me with the reliable source 🙏. I'm 56 and have suffered for years with addiction, anxiety and severe ptsd, I got my panic attacks under control myself years ago and they have come back with a vengeance, I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't get the full satisfying breath out, it's absolutely crippling me, i live in Germany. I don't know much about these mushrooms. Really need a reliable source!! Can't wait to get them
@Mcdogmom288
2 ай бұрын
Yes Predroavaro. Congrats! I'm really happy for you that your wife decided to help you. I always admire those who beat their addiction. Knowing it's possible to fix your life knowing there's people out there that have done what I thought was impossible gives me hope I will make it through as well. Those who share their experiences don't know how much it helps when you're about to give up, it gives you the strength knowing somone who actully know what it's like to go through this tell you it's possible, it's not the same somone telling you you can do it when they have no idea what it's like, but hearing somone who knows what it's like that helps a lot since you understand it firsthand and made it out gives so much hope. so thanks for sharing.
@VinceMunoz-wx7je
2 ай бұрын
How do I find him? Is he on Instagram
@joethomas-x6q
2 ай бұрын
Yes he's Predroavaro
@DiegoRiojas-qr1sl
2 ай бұрын
I would like to know from those who have solved PTSD and anxiety, if they have solved it definitively and how to understand what quantity of psilocybin to take and when, for how long. And can you really heal without having an addiction? Thanks to everyone for helping me understand, I want to understand if it's something that can help me solve the problem (I have c-ptsd)
@fitjourney2346
3 жыл бұрын
This man is very intelligent, very articulate, very thoughtful. His ideas flow in such a natural manner that he gets his points across effortlessly.
@anthonymoses3697
3 жыл бұрын
Well said!
@incorruptibleword4513
3 жыл бұрын
This is the wisdom that flows from compassion
@bobdillaber1195
3 жыл бұрын
@@incorruptibleword4513 And from his actual experience with countless individuals caught in this cycle.
@elizabethsheehan9748
3 жыл бұрын
💯💯💯💯
@bobdillaber1195
3 жыл бұрын
@Daniel Alexander Could you explain that. Not sure what you mean.
@claussorensen4269
3 жыл бұрын
17 years in recovery. I've found that I've spent the entirety of my recovery unlearning everything I learned about myself as a child. I totally relate to your assessment of addiction.
@VelcroKittie
3 жыл бұрын
Excellent to read Claus!
@waltersobchak7275
3 жыл бұрын
You have a strong mind
@bobdillaber1195
3 жыл бұрын
My experience also Claus.
@stevena.juarez6259
2 жыл бұрын
Right on Brother...
@jimmymags6516
2 жыл бұрын
Did your addiction come from emotional trauma ?
@belindalarissa311
3 жыл бұрын
He’s so compassionate. If only everyone had this much empathy for their fellow man .
@themaharishi8160
3 жыл бұрын
People are to busy counting money and escaping reality they ain't got time for nothing else. Basically everyone is an addict. It's doesn't really matter if it's money, power, things, activities or drugs. It's as bad to waste your life watching TV as it is doing drugs or working in an office 60 hours a week. Balance is the one thing everyone should search for. There are two kinds of people. The ones who do to much drugs and the ones who don't do enough of the right ones ;-)
@aqanni
3 жыл бұрын
@@themaharishi8160 i learned from this comment as much as i learned from the video
@VelcroKittie
3 жыл бұрын
@@aqanni This is where the internet comments section actually works! A great comment by TheMaharishi. They have hit the nail on the head. We are all addicted. This is something I learned coming through addiction myself and out the other side. As cheesy as this sounds, I have become addicted to actually living and loving my day, totally pure save a little vape machine I use and that will be removed this year.
@demonprincess2045
3 жыл бұрын
I have compassion for those who actually try to overcome their addiction. But the ones that rob, kill, lie, do anything to get drugs I have no respect or sympathy for. They were horrible people before drugs and they're even worse on them. I know. I deal with addicts all the time at work. They treat me like shit, are rude, nasty, selfish people.
@davidwright1159
2 жыл бұрын
Unfortunately society will never change addicted 40 years amputation of right leg 3 wee brothers 2 çousins umpteen pals ALL DEAD "WE SAW THE NEEDLE, WE SAW THE ĎÀMAGE DONE..
@Bloody77Brain
Жыл бұрын
249 days clean This man changed my life today and he helped me to understand My addiction
@DogGran
5 ай бұрын
How are you?
@jesuschrist2612
3 жыл бұрын
As an ex-addict myself I honestly have to say that I see myself in what he is saying. I feel like he knew better why I chose that path than myself at the time. More people need to see this.
@thesoliloquist1940
3 жыл бұрын
Does anyone also get high bc that is the only way they can talk about the bad feelings? It isnt only an escape?
@carlyross8344
3 жыл бұрын
I am an ex addict and now an AOD worker, and learning all about illicit drugs and addiction - it taught me so much about myself and why I used in the first place!
@carlyross8344
3 жыл бұрын
This video makes so much sense!!! Everybody needs to hear this!!! This guy is brilliant!!!
@psynchronist
3 жыл бұрын
@@thesoliloquist1940 Yes, its all relative to the individual. Some use addictions to forget, others use them to remember.
@rockersmood1609
3 жыл бұрын
You’re never an ex addict , you’re always an addict!!! You just learn how live with it , manage it so it doesn’t get out of hand!!
@sheilamacpherson4948
3 жыл бұрын
When your live in a state of fight or flight for so long, you don't even notice you're walking around in a state of fight or flight. Then your own behaviors and expectations compound your problems. The relief of "just one" or "just one more" becomes a necessity. And sometimes it literally is. Can't tell you how many times putting drugs in my system kept me from killing myself.
@jimmy1143
3 жыл бұрын
The great news is, you can overcome anxiety, you can overcome trauma, and you can overcome addiction/s. There are plenty of tools and resources to guide you through, you just need the right ones to suit your situation.
@dabeezkneez8716
3 жыл бұрын
When you are able to put even just this tiny distance between your true self and your behaviour, as you have here in this comment, then you are already positioned to win back your self and live your best life. What you can 'see' can be exposed and changed. Blessings and peace to you.🙏🏾
@paularejas1887
3 жыл бұрын
I recommend Tom bilyeu, Russel Brand and Jay shetty podcasts. We are what we are exposed to (books, videos, tv shows, people, etc) and when you have deep seated traumas, there is so much to learn from people who dedicate a lifetime at helping people like you. These podcast by these highly empathetic people who seek to interview great human beings are overflowing with powerful information on how to help yourself. You end up becoming your own savior.
@karawigley6231
3 жыл бұрын
What sucks though is eventually the very thing you feel is helping will become the very thing you hate. Idk, addiction & being an addict is such a complex thing. One thing I have learned though throughout my struggle is I’d rather be present in life feeling than to be half way there feeling nothing.
@wordup897
3 жыл бұрын
How are you doing now, Sheila?
@gaborkorthy8355
3 жыл бұрын
There is no cure for my addiction, for I am absolutely powerless over it. I can however not engage in my addictive behavior once I find serenity. The way to find serenity is to make the 12 steps a way of life. Once that happens I no longer want to engage in my addictive behavior. This is the means to address my early childhood traumas with out engaging in my addiction. 11 years sober this month !
@GamePlayer775
3 жыл бұрын
Amazing!
@marks.6869
3 жыл бұрын
Well done but let’s face it the 12 steps don’t work for everyone. Low % of success
@sidebar3970
3 жыл бұрын
Congratulations!!! ♥️
@jessicaabbassi1140
3 жыл бұрын
@@marks.6869 Agreed. They definitely help me but ultimately therapy and inner self work and a lot of other daily self care, digging into myself and other things is what has helped me stay clesn more than the steps ever has although it is a factor and positive thing in my life as well.
@jessicaabbassi1140
3 жыл бұрын
Congrats👍🙌
@socialworkgroupa5256
4 ай бұрын
Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.
@fakiriayoub8087
4 ай бұрын
Can you help with the reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. Very hard to get a reliable source here in Australia. Really need!
@MohamedZaitoun-mh9ht
4 ай бұрын
Yes, dr.porass. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.
@AfkAliaga
4 ай бұрын
I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.
@fakiriayoub8087
4 ай бұрын
Is he on instagram?
@MohamedZaitoun-mh9ht
4 ай бұрын
Yes he is dr.porass.
@alifewithpoetry
3 жыл бұрын
“This is trench warfare” - “It is a response to human suffering” - “An attempt to escape suffering” “It is all about trauma” - This is deep. I agree completely. Thank you for sharing. 🙏🖤
@abekelly9935
3 жыл бұрын
A life with poetry... Your name tells a whole story.
@bryanfrombuffalo7685
3 жыл бұрын
Addiction doesn't run in your family ..it runs in humans kzitem.info/news/bejne/x32o1aOCmJaehqA
@everilliem3292
2 жыл бұрын
@@abekelly9935 it really doesn't.
@deborahchesser7375
3 жыл бұрын
No matter what led them to this, they don’t want to be there.
@zenokarlsbach4292
3 жыл бұрын
And never realise they are a pest in society.
@wakeandbakewithmaryjane1767
3 жыл бұрын
I like to get rid of these actual ' pests ' on youtube ! Ignorance is not bliss, its a reflection of YOU not anyone else that you chose to reflect it on to.
@zenokarlsbach4292
3 жыл бұрын
@@wakeandbakewithmaryjane1767 If they realised it they would change. That remains my opinion. If you like sddicts for neighbours etc it is your pleasure. Not mine! And don't worry, I do understand the intention of the video.
@wakeandbakewithmaryjane1767
3 жыл бұрын
Be happy in your ignorance, no said you cant. You are clearly very happy in it. Carry on. I just wish we could get rid of you the same way. It means nothing to me, YOU are the minority not me. No need to explain your ignorance, I couldnt care less about it. Triggered much ?
@MyNextShotWontMiss
3 жыл бұрын
@@wakeandbakewithmaryjane1767 It's unfortunate that so many people are so selfish and self-centered that they only think about the annoyance of having an addict as a neighbor. Instead of seeing themselves as part of a community where some in that community are suffering, they only think of how they are bothered by it.
@007phokus
3 жыл бұрын
Pain is and always will be the underlying factor in Addiction..
@betterapproachtolife.motiv3265
3 жыл бұрын
Yes and avoiding that pain leads to even more pain .. it is tough
@jessewhite2226
3 жыл бұрын
But not an excuse. We need to stay strong
@annettealmvik
3 жыл бұрын
Realization of what caused the pain, to Accept the past and to accept one self, is a start.
@kervin780
3 жыл бұрын
It's a vicious cycle. I dont want it. The pain. But I think im a sucker and love the hurt.
@chriswilson1968
3 жыл бұрын
Not really, how many kids are out at parties and someone pulls out some hardcore drugs and they accidentally get addicted to it? Pain played no role here only stupidity. Its very possible to get addicted to certain drugs the first time you try it.
@jcdova29
Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this video. It has resonated with me to my core. I been struggling with a heroin addiction and I can’t figure out why I keep going back to it. I now understand I been carrying trauma I suffered as a little boy. I locked it away but in my late 30’s it came out and I started using. Drives me crazy because I have always hated drugs and now I became a slave. I am in tears right now and if I could just hold on.
@danielboone6481
Жыл бұрын
You can get through this, but here is the tough reality that you will have to face. It will always be there, that is the addiction and to overcome it you will have to do the following. 1. Find another activity to replace it (working out, chess, sports, joining a club of sorts etc….) 2. Find a support group, people downplay this but it will open your eyes 3. Do it for someone and if there is no one and that is the case for some people, do it because you love yourself. 4. Because it only gets worse if you even do it once more. Love you man!
@leozunic9508
Жыл бұрын
You are not alone.
@Anonymous-km5pj
Жыл бұрын
it is demonic isnt it ?
@coreycox2345
Жыл бұрын
@@Anonymous-km5pj Many of those traumas must have been perpetrated by the insane. ONe still needs to face them.
@Essence-93
Жыл бұрын
First get to a treatment center to separate the body and clear the mind then with support and things to replace habits because they are just that a responsive habit that can be broken with work. With time you will be able to put the pieces of you back together and you will look back at how beautifully shattered you were and are no longer. Through experience I know you will get through this and you will keep the message going ❤😉
@katherinekelly6432
3 жыл бұрын
Addiction is about escaping suffering but there is another form of suffering unrelated to the suffering from a traumatic past. This is the suffering of the now. The accumulated every day moments that drive a person into madness. In my opinion it is a mistake to think addiction is only caused by past trauma. Thinking that way can miss the Elephant in the room. I see more people using "addiction" to escape the now than I do to escape the past. It is also important to not think addiction is only about drugs. Almost anything can be used as an addiction. Addiction is an attachment to something to cope with suffering. To escape suffering. A healthy relationship too suffering (pain) eliminates addiction.
@melcryarfineart
3 жыл бұрын
I agree with you. I know some seek substances or experiences simply because they trigger the pleasure center of the brain and it feels good. Then they seek it out and don't function as an adult. These people do not particularly have trauma.
@garethheathcote4988
3 жыл бұрын
I agree with you Katherine,I didn't have any significant trauma in childhood in fact no trauma at all,I was however unhappy in my teens and didn't feel as though I fitted in. Then I found cannabis which opened up a new world and a whole lot of new associates though that is all they were. Looking back on that pot use it was non stop and full of addiction red flags. In recent years most of my use has been to stem the memories of things that I have done during my addiction along with boredom.i am now just under one year clean from any mind altering substance and I've never been happier!
@ishouldbesleeeping
3 жыл бұрын
Yesterday or a second ago is just as much the past as 10 or 20 years ago is
@hakapelika7024
3 жыл бұрын
Katherine Kelly indeed. And chronic pain. It ruins ones life, the medicating becomes the only option 4 escape.
@afterthestorm221
3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely I've been married to my husband for 15 years, 10 of those years he would cycle in and out of addiction and I didn't get it I never had used. My story in a nutshell. He went to prison for unrelated offenses for 2 years, I broke my foot my doctor gave me a huge unnecessary prescription of opiates and the rest is history... I am now a recovering heroin addict for not addressing the trauma of now. I try not to use the word "never" and I do my best not to be judgmental, I was humbled to say the least! right off my high horse.
@LulaS
3 жыл бұрын
We tend to numb the pain with drugs, too much unhealthy food, alcohol, sex, gambling, porn, etc. But it’s in the pain that lies our best transformation ever! Your worst times can become your best times. Don’t numb the pain, use it as fuel instead 🔥🔥🔥. Much love and success to all of you. ❤️❤️❤️
@forexdaver
3 жыл бұрын
Great Advice. Peace and Love to you and yours as well.
@LulaS
3 жыл бұрын
@@forexdaver It’s awesome to hear that, thanks a lot! 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
@mou7866
3 жыл бұрын
100% true but in the eye of the storm, how do you see the silver lining?
@LulaS
3 жыл бұрын
@@mou7866 a good start, in my opinion, is to open up about the pain or the addiction with supportive people, with those we have a great connection with. To feel understood and surrounded by those who care about us really decreases the emotional discomfort and is one of the best 1st steps we can make towards recovery.
@betterapproachtolife.motiv3265
3 жыл бұрын
“Dont numb the pain” enables you to move through it .. good quote
@andranistor4630
3 жыл бұрын
I'm an alcoholic and this speech hit so hard, so very true
@jenwendy7
3 жыл бұрын
Yep. I couldn't maintain sobriety without facing the traumas I endured. 3 years into my sobriety and bam! The night terrors and hallucinations started - ptsd. I found a therapist who also happened to be sober so she understood the value of my sobriety. She was also a gifted therapist and asked me all the right questions. That was 33 years ago. I'll be forever grateful. I've seen many fellows go back out because no one understood they needed help with trauma :( Been a fan of Dr. Mate now for years. He's supposed to release a documentary, soon.
@terrinaweb4189
3 жыл бұрын
You’re honesty is inspiring to see. I hope you can stay safe 🙏🏻
@hassanking4275
3 жыл бұрын
You cant diagnose yourself
@Junkopartna
3 жыл бұрын
@@jenwendy7 been sober going on six years. I’ve told a few people I swear I haven’t had a good nights sleep in about five years. Night mares almost every time I drift off. Can’t really stay asleep longer than two or three hours. But even tho there’s all that, I still feel stronger emotionally and physically than I ever have.
@loadapish
3 жыл бұрын
My mate is an alcoholic. He is anorexic now because he cant hold down food. Hes in pain everyday. It doesnt look like he is going to get better. He has liver damage and i think kidney damage too. My problem is weed. I am having a hard time stopping smoking weed. I enjoy it but it stinks and makes me poor
@brianwalsh1401
2 жыл бұрын
I don't think you can come out of a dysfunctional family that may have trauma, abuse neglect or all of them and not be an addict of some sort. It is the core of addiction and other issues like Dr. Mate said. I use to think only drugs and alcohol qualified but now I know it could be anything. Trying to fill the hole in the soul with something outside of us. Dr. Mate is on point completely.
@UN1VERS3S
Жыл бұрын
To be honest, I don't agree with some of his statements. Addiction is not only caused by Deficenies or suffering. It's also caused by extremes. You can see many spoiled brats getting addicted to videogames as a child and party drugs as a teen. You can see people whose very happy and comfortable get addicted to alcohol, they use it not to alleviate their pain, but just for mere enjoyment.
@Joel-sv3ww
Жыл бұрын
@@UN1VERS3S wrong
@alyssaheitkamp6590
Жыл бұрын
💯
@thesejonezes1530
Жыл бұрын
@@UN1VERS3S you think just because they are "happy and comfortable" that they are not still searching for something to fill that hole, using something over and over but "just for enjoyment" qualifies as addiction bro.... we look to that one thing to make us feel good until thats the only thing we can look at, thats how addiction works.
@SunShine-qm7hu
10 ай бұрын
I agree with you that hole could be anything. In my case that would be binge eating or tending to be anorexic.
@angiemmorris1978
3 жыл бұрын
i have healed myself from trauma that began before i was born. NO ONE knows you as well as you know yourself. listen to yourself and heal
@YellowIcicle
3 жыл бұрын
Would you mind sharing how you went about it?
@angiemmorris1978
3 жыл бұрын
@@YellowIcicle it began by listening to life, and all things that were happening to me, being alone and no matter what i listened to myself and tried to understand my choices, why i made them, what i could learn. for 3 years i used meth every day and because i chose not to beat myself up anymore over my choices it freed me up to learn from it. i learned forgiveness for my birth mother and my adopted mother from my cat that got lost and then came back.. there is so much more. i did it on my own and then discovered Gabor Mate on accident and then i realized i had figured out his theory on myself and used his methods on myself without even knowing about them. i am 56 years old and for the very first time in my life i love myself and am figuring the way out from addiction and depression with only a GED, youtube and an open mind. i am truly thankful and want to share.
@egyjuice
3 жыл бұрын
@@angiemmorris1978 could you tell me more on how you did it
@angiemmorris1978
3 жыл бұрын
@@egyjuice I will try...first I really listened to my own story. I took my time and started to identify my feelings, why i had them, how I felt about my family, how I was treated, how I related to the world, the circumstances that brought me into the world, figured out missing pieces, started paying attention to the things life was showing and telling me...i am trying to get in touch with dr mate i am a walking, talking example of his theories and methods and i did it on my own. i have so much more i want to say but I get overwhelmed with it all and can't find the words i need. however they are coming, the universe is smoothing things out and doors will open and I will be able to share. no one needs to suffer because of lack. we all have exactly what we need inside ourselves to heal. we just have to relearn how to listen and understand our own unique self that no-one else on earth can know, i am seriously wanting to do a youtube channel about stuff like this, if i can help anyone from suffering even for just 5 minutes its a win for me''
@CherryBerryFashion
3 жыл бұрын
@@angiemmorris1978 Truly wonderful! Having this much strength is a true power. Good for you!
@rosschambers1987
3 жыл бұрын
We need more love and compassion in this world.
@demonprincess2045
3 жыл бұрын
It's hard to have compassion for a POS addict who robbed you, or hurt you, or is just a scumbag. Not saying all addicts are like this but the ones I have encountered don't deserve compassion from me.
@ThorOdinson1269
2 жыл бұрын
@@demonprincess2045 That is their automatic response to get what they need to cope with their suffering.
@brotherman1
2 жыл бұрын
@@ThorOdinson1269 Sounds like an excuse, having an addiction doesn't automatically turn you to thievery and violence. Those people still need help if they are even willing to take it, but doesn't mean those actions can simply be excused.
@johannlothe
2 жыл бұрын
@@brotherman1 It's not an excuse, it's a reason. It's a result of addiction. It's literally the equivalent to a stab wound making you bleed. Just stop bleeding? It's obviously still a shit thing to do, but people do bad things due to bad things happening to them. And not showing compassion because you were emotionally affected by someone else's emotional pain is not the way to go man.
@averayugen8462
2 жыл бұрын
We need a society that supports peoples basic needs, that's the "cure"
@lifewitholliethegsp9203
3 жыл бұрын
This is why LOVE is the most important commandment. We need love each other not judge each other. May God bless everyone who is struggling ♥️ and everyone who is unsympathetic.
@beck5597
Жыл бұрын
I'm an addict..I wish there wasn't so much stigma around addiction,and that there were more like Gabor that had compassion,empathy, understanding for addicts...ask not why the addiction,but why the pain...❤️💯💯🙏
@tajha123
Жыл бұрын
Excellent take away!♥️🙏🏻✨
@mlcs179
10 ай бұрын
So good - this should be a question all clinicians should ask, “not why the addiction, why the pain.” Thankyou
@mlcs179
10 ай бұрын
The response society takes just perpetuates the behaviour. Perpetuates the your not worthy, shame, less than. How can people not see this?
@europanzz
3 жыл бұрын
I had a food addiction for 2 in my late teens.. it disppeared when I met my husband.he was kind and loving.
@kryssym1460
3 жыл бұрын
I’m developing a good addiction from doing Uber eats so much since the pandemic #help 😩
@isabellalopez6231
3 жыл бұрын
I pray good health & healing for everyone who’s see’s this & everyone who is truly good.
@Aethelbeorn
3 жыл бұрын
I'm more of a chaotic neutral.
@hellhammer7444
3 жыл бұрын
Only if they're actually good though right?
@chaosdomain4682
3 жыл бұрын
Isabella, I'm afraid God doesn't exist, nor Satan, not Mahoma, not Jesus Christ, not Budha, not Zaratustra, etc... 'em are all LIES per se to control Population. The Empowered People are very interested in entertaining us (The Forgoten), cause if they don't do it them would be exposed to our power (Spiritual Power), cause God you are and it's inside you. You have all the answers to yourself and you just have to Genuin Trust Yourself. I'll leave you something would make U not to pray anymore, cause if U Whant To Change Something:"Just Do It" New Order -- True Faith I feel so extraordinary Something's got a hold on me I get this feeling I'm in motion A sudden sense of liberty I don't care 'cause I'm not there And I don't care if I'm here tomorrow Again and again I've taken too much Of the things that cost you too much I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun When I was a very small boy Very small boys talked to me Now that we've grown up together They're afraid of what they see That's the price that we all pay And the value of destiny comes to nothing I can't tell you where we're going I guess there was just no way of knowing I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun I feel so extraordinary Something's got a hold on me I get this feeling I'm in motion A sudden sense of liberty The chances are we've gone too far You took my time and you took my money Now I fear you've left me standing In a world that's so demanding I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun I used to think that the day would never come I'd see delight in the shade of the morning sun My morning sun is the drug that brings me near To the childhood I lost, replaced by fear I used to think that the day would never come That my life would depend on the morning sun End
@chaosdomain4682
3 жыл бұрын
Well, there's another way too:"If You Whant To Change Something, Change Yourself" Thanks for reading if you have done it, and if you haven't doesn't matter. Peace, Love and Anarchy (Notice that Peace and Love are before Anarchy) One Love One Heart 🙌❤✌😉
@chaosdomain4682
3 жыл бұрын
As I said before:"You Have All The Answers To Yourself ". Definetly I'm not an Oracle. But I'm afraid God does not exist cause I've been searching Him or Her for so long, and due to all this Hell I've lived He or She, in case that's the answer, might have appeared and they didn't. I believe in Love, Kindness, Empathy, Peace (Real One), and all this qualities Human Kind has and he's lost... That could be an answer?
@TylerDurden-oy2hm
3 жыл бұрын
I get teary listening to Dr Mate.His compassion and humility are remarkable.
@nadineksjohnson2314
3 жыл бұрын
Same.
@kealowilson2816
3 жыл бұрын
as an recent addict entering recovery, having heard this video, now probably 6 times in the last 90 days, everytime I well up, because he NAILS it. I didn't even understand myself until I had watched this 10 minutes of video.
@ladyt3927
3 жыл бұрын
True❤️🙌🙏
@prarambharehab2749
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/kWms3KKeqYhipGU
@zoehope73
3 жыл бұрын
Nice moniker
@caleumtweedale6279
Жыл бұрын
I lost my mom at 15 to lung cancer after that my dad started really hitting the bottle hard. I became his sometimes literal punching bag until he passed away oct 1st 2018 at 57 from a heart attack I was 21. My family from my grandfather 2 uncles and two aunts on my dads side are all alcoholics. The only way we know how to deal with pain is substance abuse. After my father died I really started to lose it I lacked guidance and the only two people who really gave me that guidance were no longer on this earth. I slowly delved deeper and deeper into cocaine and alchohol until I was starting to lose control then me and my little sister sold the family home she moved on with a boyfriend and went to therapy i moved into my friends house with 425k in my pocket and made cocaine my best friend. Needless to say I blew most of that money on cocaine gambling women and booze. Anything to just make me not feel. I’m a lil over a month out of rehab and have had 2 lapses already. I’m not ashamed tho I’m proud that I’m fighting to live and I’ve given up trying to die. Life is not easy or fair but it is worth it. It’s time to break the cycle much love, Cale.
@marceNJ27
Жыл бұрын
I love what you said, life may be hard and not fear but is so worth it. I deal with alcohol abuse and the pain I feel sometimes is just unbearable but I am not ready to give up. We can do it!!
@pine4335
Жыл бұрын
How much did your dad or mom smoke? Asking this because-of concern of lung cancer Im 23 tears old , smoker for 3 years and smoke about 20 cigarettes daily
@ginadean5696
Жыл бұрын
@@marceNJ27 ❤
@maltesefalcon4221
Жыл бұрын
I read you and I feel you , I hope you're doing well
@jazminehunter7913
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for your story. Keep fighting.
@QuestionEverythingButWHY
3 жыл бұрын
"This is the real secret of life -- to be completely engaged with what you are doing in the here and now. And instead of calling it work, realize it is play." -- Alan Watts
@egyjuice
3 жыл бұрын
Wow that is awesome statement
@Ucho469
3 жыл бұрын
Nothing to do with what's being discussed in the video whatsoever. You just craving the feels of grandiosity by using some "wise person's words" randomly in a YT comment.
@Ucho469
3 жыл бұрын
@Sheila Mchgee Just sayin'... 🤣😘
@johng2024
3 жыл бұрын
@@Ucho469 I agree, was a little confused on this 1.
@SmartMoveGraphics
3 жыл бұрын
Well said.....Alan Watts. Thanks Question Everything? :)
@okthennone
3 жыл бұрын
Addiction is the outward physical expression of inner pain and turmoil.
@robbob3456
3 жыл бұрын
Amen!!
@deltahomicide9300
3 жыл бұрын
Not always. I didn't turn to drugs because of a trauma or bad childhood but it certainly became a crutch as I got older and experienced sadness and loss
@okthennone
3 жыл бұрын
@@deltahomicide9300 I said nothing about trauma or bad childhood, although they can lead to addiction. Inner pain and turmoil or similar if not synonymous with sadness and loss.
@deltahomicide9300
3 жыл бұрын
@@okthennone Oh okay. Well allow me to clarify where I'm coming from. I saw addictive substances for what they are. No matter where I came from or what I've been thru - I got addicted thru enough usage and time. That's the nature of addictive substances. One day I did it to have a good time / forget, and before I knew it I became an an addict. Still it's a cop out to say Everyone gets hooked bc they're trying to fill a hole, a spiritual need. No. I kept feeding the habit until it became a chemical dependency. I don't need to seek therapy or medical treatment. I quit or cut down on my own. My whole thing is I fly solo and stay sober, and other addicts can do the same. I know this is sacrilege in many formal programs - the idea that we can quit on our own with no formal support network or medical treatments. Well I'm here to say not only did I quit, but once in a while I can still drink or get high. It's not a relapse either. I simply have my priorities in order
@stevecooper7038
2 жыл бұрын
No, it isn't.
@aidanfilms702
3 жыл бұрын
"Addiction is an attempt to escape suffering, temporarily." Wow, one of the best quotes I've ever heard.
@paulapancake3069
3 жыл бұрын
When people love themselves, they control their existence. When they don't love themselves, they self sabotage. I was born into addiction and fight everyday to steer clear of those who don't love themselves. It's easy enough to do...I haven't spoken to my mother for most of my life. I love her, but I love myself more. Love and blessing to all. You got this
@KingMark33
Жыл бұрын
This has been so hard for me. For a long time, I’ve know that I don’t like my mom. No contact would be so liberating for me. My issue is the consequences that will come with it. I’m sure my whole family will hate me and take my moms side. I’ve been trying to tell them how emotionally abusive she’s been to me…the only responses I get are “give her a break, she’s doing the best she can” or “well it’s your fault because you don’t stand up to her.” No one ever takes my side. I suffer from addiction, but no one ever recognizes it as a result of my childhood trauma…but when my mom is mean, manipulative and a controlling bully…they all refer to her childhood trauma and say I need to focus on the good in her and not the bad. This is the result of being the family scapegoat and having siblings as the flying monkeys
@paulapancake3069
Жыл бұрын
@@KingMark33 I completely understand.. I haven't spoke to my mom since I was 38... I'm 48 this year. We can love someone from a distance. They never teach that. You do what you heart wants....if everyone taking the abusers side, holds you there...I will pray for you. I have been alone my while life...its ok to carry on and love yourself. You are worth it. I love my mom and pray for her. I have been doing the best...highly educated Loving ,caring and respectful peropls...we become what we allow. We all suffer from addictions..be an addict of something good...like education or work...this what I chose to be addicted 2. GOD BLESS YOU!!! Sit in the passenger and let God drive!!!!
@dicesquaresuk
11 ай бұрын
Real shit
@asktiffanyanything9627
10 ай бұрын
So true
@Rambleon444
3 жыл бұрын
The bigger problem is, these traumatized people before they heal, keep having more children and then traumatize them and the cycle continues. I don't say this lightly, it is just sadly what I have seen too many times.
@anthonymoses3697
3 жыл бұрын
What you are saying here is very true. It's also the reason I've chosen not to get married and have kids. At least not yet. I'm far from healed and I certainly don't want to put that damage onto my wife and kids, should I ever get to have them.
@Igneous01
3 жыл бұрын
This cycle goes back all the way to WW1. How many vets returned home and took up drinking and hitting their wives and children?
@anthonymoses3697
3 жыл бұрын
@@Igneous01 no, this goes all the way back. Back to the beginning of humanity. People hurting people is a tale as old as time; even the bible will tell you that. The story of Cain and Able is the perfect example: One brother beats and kills the other over jealously. Fascinatingly, that's the first story of humanity after being kicked out of the garden of Eden. At least that's my understanding. But yeah, the people returning from war definitely bring demons home with them.
@Igneous01
3 жыл бұрын
@@anthonymoses3697 Very true. Trauma is as old as humanity. What we call PTSD today was the default mode of survival for our early ancestors. It's a miracle we ever evolved out of that mode and can even comprehend things like love and affection today.
@thefall-downkings6556
3 жыл бұрын
@@anthonymoses3697 True. I heard in a talk that trauma is in our genes, dating all the way back to Adam and Eve. Still, my own childhood trauma sure made it heavier.
@charlotteknutsen7262
3 жыл бұрын
It saddens me how truly these human beings with addiction are so harshly judged by society. Really disgusting honestly. Thank you for this factual and informative video.
@maritighe5674
3 жыл бұрын
It's very hard , I was repeaditly raped as a child by a neighbour, there were also troubles at home with drink and fighting n abuse... I was in a very abusive relationship... I'm 46 now and i have to admit an alcoholic n addicted to prescribed medication.... I've had friends just screaming at me and saying they'll end the friendship if I don't GET MYSELF TOGETHER... even family telling me I'm useless.. it makes me feel worse so I'll drink to numb how horrible I am... I don't want to be this way
@Michael-xm4ux
3 жыл бұрын
As I grow older, I stopped thinking it’s our intelligence, or education, or the amount of money we have that makes us unique and different from each other it’s our experiences. those experiences dictate how we think, how we love, how we react to stress, and eventually how we choose to leave this world.
@Stall-FedCalves
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/qaJtrmSGqX57qGU
@vannah12222
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah it sucks. Luckily, in my experience, at least, the stigma has been lessening, even if ever so slightly. I'm 24 now, and compared to when I first entered a treatment facility at age 17, even the professionals have begun to rethink their approach and the words they say. I won't lie and say I don't still hear people saying ignorant stuff, but in the last five years I've definitely seen a decrease in it. Something I'm really grateful for is how people have started to accept that addiction is a disease. Not everyone, but in the last year alone I've had people come up to me and apologize for saying things like "addicts are just bad people that choose to make bad decisions," and so on. I think the only way we're ever going to fix the drug epidemic is by learning to accept what's happening and by realizing that once an addict doesn't have to mean always an addict.
@Stall-FedCalves
3 жыл бұрын
@@vannah12222 Addiction has spiritual roots. It’s a matter of through trauma fragmenting & demons gaining access. Check out my Deliverance/Healing/Integration playlist. I’m always adding to it.
@srch4trthwithjoanne640
3 жыл бұрын
He definitely sums up addiction well! Good video! Since 1973 I’ve always been addicted to something. Finally at the age of 62 I can say I’ve been clean for just over five years.
@laurajaynedunning1931
Жыл бұрын
The work this man puts into this world is a gift. As a psychotherapist I read a lot of theory but I’ve never heard anyone make sense of addiction with such deep wisdom. I have such deep gratitude for his teachings, personally and professionally.
@athenak631
3 жыл бұрын
Well explained. Even if we re not addicts as such, we all engage in numbing, distracting and compulsive behavious to distract ourselves from 'problems we have no other solutions for'
@waynerobinson6629
3 жыл бұрын
Here’s another one I think you’ll like- check it out!! kzitem.info/news/bejne/kW2A0HahcaNmepw
@indan383
2 жыл бұрын
Yes!
@wLTcqsjtSLZtz99fpbHn
2 жыл бұрын
"Even if we re not addicts as such, we all engage in"... thats the difference between an addiction as a medical disorder and a bad mood imho.
@AKonnichiwa
3 жыл бұрын
The way he said "well, okay," is the most understanding tone I've ever heard
@writteninthesky
3 жыл бұрын
He is a Master of Compassion. 💓
@charlieshepherd7829
3 жыл бұрын
Finally, someone who knows that addiction is not a disease! I’ve faced addiction 3 times with 3 different drugs and beat it with zero professional help. A new approach must be taken and this Doctor is on the right path. God bless you sir!
@ratoneJR
3 жыл бұрын
"3 times with 3 different drugs ". Did you manufacture these drugs, or did you get a 'script from a professional? Be honest with yourself, you DID receive professional help.
@TheWolfsnack
3 жыл бұрын
@Nexter5722 I disagree....for me it was very difficult...I functioned very well, worked in a professional field and used heroin on weekends or between jobs (I worked mostly big projects as a surveyor) ....I had the good fortune to overdose at 17 in 1968, with the better fortune to have a couple older friends who saved my life....but I was cautious after that, and equally worried about hepatitis so was as safe as possible. I was at the upper end of the user portion of the continuum of use- abuse.-addiction It was much later in life, during the economic downturn of the early 90s and back in university in a Social Work program that I was actually first diagnosed with PTSD....the journey in PTSD treatment then a growing understanding of Complex PTSD has the effect of eliminating the desire for pain numbing drugs. Since then I have worked with a lot of people who had addiction as part of their issues, and virtually all of them had been exposed to childhood trauma .
@Stall-FedCalves
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/qaJtrmSGqX57qGU
@yo-rh8lk
3 жыл бұрын
You beat it once
@greatwhite3676
3 жыл бұрын
What drugs? Using needles? Smoking K2 is not the same as shooting cocaine and heroin. You sound like the same people that say "oh pick yourself up just stop"
@extraphone3399
Жыл бұрын
This has been a theory of mine. First time I've heard anything like this!!!! Rehab to me is useless for me personally. Never been. Never will. Interventions? Worst idea EVER. The addict goes to treatment for wrong reason. Can't be for your kids, spouse,fam, etc. Has to b 4 you I have seen more in my 40 yrs that no human being should have to endure. So I decided this is the reason for addiction, if you get to the core of the trauma, relapse chance is slim. But I have decided that I'm going to be a substance abuse counselor. Bc there is literally nothing a person can walk in and tell me that ive not experienced May sound far fetched. But I think of everything. I tell myself I've been through all these years of pure hell, abuse, trauma, everything, so I can relate to anyone that will come in my office to see me. That's my purpose. I've been through hell so I could ease others away from passing through it's threshold. I have extreme childhood trauma. As well as the rest of my life until now. I have lost over 25 FRIENDS to the opiate epidemic. I don't want a spot on that list . God bless everyone. Keep ur heads up. Don't be ashamed of WHO YOU ARE. Be ashamed of decisions and actions. Life didn't get this bad overnight....... Gonna take more than overnight to clean up ur mess. Start by literally making a list of everything u need to do. Starting with easiest to the hardest. Work ur way from top to bottom. After a few things work out easily, ur whole attitude will change. Bc u now know little things we take for granted are things that can help us more than we think.......... Working on med ins bc unfortunately I'll need replacement therapy for a bit. Suboxone works if you let it honestly. Then I found out I only have 4 tickets to pay to get license back. There were 8 or 9..... Health/sobriety Mend relationships License GED Loan for classes/Enroll College Small HUD loan so I don't ever have to live this way again..... I'm excited for the first time in a very long time..... Sorry for the novel. But I felt compared to share. Good luck to anyone and everyone with whatever journey ur on. Even the ppl that think being 5,6 or even 7 days clean is nothing...... Its a hell of a start loves 💜
@marceNJ27
Жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I believe there is hope for me then.
@ConsultantMasamune
Жыл бұрын
I recently had a deep conversation about addiction arriving at the conclusion that there has to be another angle that we aren't seeing outside of the two predominant modes of thought. Thank you for this. This is a solid alternative explanation.
@freebird7017
Жыл бұрын
Extra phone, my best wishes that you achieve your goal of becoming a counsellor. The wounded healer is always the best healer.
@andreawierzbicki9187
Жыл бұрын
God bless you on your journey-
@paulhardy8245
Жыл бұрын
Suboxone worked for me, miracle drug.
@technic1285
3 жыл бұрын
How I've seen it since high school is: "It doesn't matter how we label it- choice, disease, or otherwise- because that doesn't get people the help they need." I hadn't put together the response to trauma part. This was eye opening.
@jaydee7038
3 жыл бұрын
Addiction is not just post trauma related but also starts from boredom and lack of stimulation in an individuals life
@jimmy1143
3 жыл бұрын
and peer pressure. Might be an idea to engage in a more constructive behaviour rather than a destructive behaviour, such as exercise, build a project, or owning a pet. Cravings will pass if you distract yourself long enough, given your addiciton isn't heavily engrained.
@dabeezkneez8716
3 жыл бұрын
And boredom is in itself, also a 'trauma'... Boredom is the feeling of 'emptiness', of lack, of needing to fill every waking minute with experience. It is the craving for stimulation. That isn't how we are created. We are created to feel at peace, ease and comfort without any external stimulation at all. Modern living has put us out of sync with our true nature. Take time to be by and with yourself. Blessings.🙏🏾✌🏾
@jasonfodor1951
3 жыл бұрын
Wow I wish I saw it the same way the other 3 commentors do. Ignorance is bliss!
@austinpowers8550
3 жыл бұрын
Idk I didn't start using heroin cuz I was bored. I just didn't want to be present anymore that was basically it.
@dabeezkneez8716
3 жыл бұрын
@@austinpowers8550 yes that's what the video is about, people needing to escape the present reality.
@minisoduh
3 жыл бұрын
this is so heartbreaking that we punish people for their pain. may everyone heal rather than adjust.
@flyboymic7182
3 жыл бұрын
This guy is very intelligent about addiction, I've overcome alcoholism and smoking‼️ Now I'm a professional swimmer‼️ParaS10
@mattdrayton2668
3 жыл бұрын
Amazing! well done!
@martinhall3315
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah I’m trying to stop smoking cigarettes
@mattdrayton2668
3 жыл бұрын
@@martinhall3315 think of the money you'll save and better health you'll have, you can do it.
@jonatanshabat5292
3 жыл бұрын
@@martinhall3315 you can do it! make sure to deal with your emotional needs first
@flyboymic7182
3 жыл бұрын
But only by the Grace of God
@trocycling1204
3 жыл бұрын
"the more hurt they are, the more they need to escape"
@MA-yu2ss
3 жыл бұрын
@Fiji Water wdym
@mikejflores1182
3 жыл бұрын
Repent seek forgiveness and refuse the demonic drugs of today...we trying we doing
@CharishThisLife
3 жыл бұрын
March 24 2021 I celebrated 14 years and I Said I wanted to take myself and the kids to the beach for the weekend well a friend I was taking to help me with my son who is disabled ,the first thing he says is yeah I’ll go with you maybe we can sit by the beach and drink wine coolers I said I don’t need to go to one of my favorite places and spoil it by drinking after14years and I stood firm on that well that evening for some reason I thought about wine coolers hmmmm, and just as quick I reminded myself that one of anything that could have an effect on me will lead me back to where I left off 14 years ago and quickly I played the whole tape that one is never enough for this recovering addict and I’m always reminded by my other sober/recovering friends and sponsor and sponsees that if I don’t pick it up, I won’t get high my email is whiteshawhite@gmail.com if you ever thought that you could stay clean alone that is another trick your mind plays on you, be safe and stay away from the first one, Shonda
@donjosedwards7498
3 жыл бұрын
i think even the Bad guys or beyond bad guys understand this and use this meth-od too.
@lynnbaker2336
5 ай бұрын
I'm sorry, but I had a horrific childhood that actually suppressed my innate potential to the point of lifelong emotional disability, even becoming homeless due to an impaired functioning ability. And through all of this I never had any drug or alcohol problems. Trauma leads to addiction only if the individual allows it to do so. I am now on the verge of homeownership.
@javeriaharoon7957
3 жыл бұрын
Loneliness and lack of connection with loved ones is cause of addiction.
@jrenwa3113
2 жыл бұрын
Would be considered a form of “trauma”
@lilymay4328
2 жыл бұрын
This video is amazing. My dad is an addict and throughout my childhood I always thought that he CHOSE drugs over my siblings and I, I now realise it wasn't that black and white, he self-soothed in hopes of healing his traumatic childhood and unfortunatley unded up with a severe drug addiction. This video has changed my whole perspective, I now understand my Dad and why he is the way he is and I have the upmost love and compassion towards him. Thank you!
@MiguelPerez-ty1vb
2 жыл бұрын
How much parents love their children and children love their parents? Have you watched the film “Lorenzo’s oil” starring Nick Nolte and Susan Sarandon as the parents of a child sick with a rare incurable brain disease who research and work incessantly to find a cure to save their son’s life? That never happened with addiction, the so called “family disease”. Not only parents and children of addicts, likewise psychologists, psychiatrists and rest of humanity, didn’t research the affliction, when just reading the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous (which the mainstream of addiction recovery programs are based on) and being honest to want to understand is enough to understand that addiction is the psychology of a liar, but silence the truth that would save their so called “loved ones”. Are you queuing in the crowded comforting lies or alone in the unpleasant truths? Do you believe addiction is an incurable brain disease that affects young healthy criminals that has never been found or detected by any biological or other means? The only common denominator between all addicts from any social background or distinction is that they are notorious liars. Humanity are dying deceived deceiving living a lie because parents don’t teach their children to be honest because are not honest themselves. The truth is addiction is the tormented psychology of an unforgiving liar, drugs don’t cause addiction and only liars get hooked and only honesty gets freedom. The tragedy of addiction is children who revenge a childhood hurt, or trauma, against their parents learning from example becoming victims of themselves so as to conceal the hatred to hurt others, advertising themselves as victims stealing attention. In life like in psychology events and behaviours happen for a reason. Addiction runs in families because psychologies, behaviours, beliefs and else are transmitted from parents to children, like father like son, because humanity don’t think for oneself, otherwise there would be agreement on the truth. Hate, lie, hurt, ignorance comes from hate, lie, hurt, ignorance and addiction appears in bad families of parents who hurt their children. I am a recovering addict, a fool who knows that is a fool, a wise man. I don’t know much but i know what i know. The truth is stagnated among liars and when the unpublishable truth is published mortality rates would collapse provoking humanity’s addiction recovery, a burst of psychology, guilt, shame that was bottled up, desensitised, ignored in active addiction. The war, nightmare of living a lie would end because would be proven that you are like i impossibility possible miracle God.
@billybichon5310
2 жыл бұрын
i might know why. I similarly choose drugs over my dog sometimes (my dog is my only reason to live), the more i love my dog, the more it makes me realize that i was never loved. its a paradox loop. if your dad is like me, his love for you might be the reason he chose drugs. the more he loved you, the more trauma he got from realizing he was never loved. if he is like me, he is honest, merciful, and not strict. he makes you feel good and gives advice instead of punishment. he easily changes his mind based on your opinions. i hope im right.
@alyssaheitkamp6590
Жыл бұрын
One thing I try to keep in mind with my parents is they didn't have the mental health resources medications and it was something that a lot of people kept things hush hush because it's frowned apon.
@alyssaheitkamp6590
Жыл бұрын
Unfortunately they are cut off as a child I understand and as a mother I learned my lessons and I will no longer come back three months later and make up it's not happening that is the same things went too far when you put my son in your house with drugs in it when I asked you if you are using please let me know I'll stay somewhere else she said you know I'm not doing anything you and my grandson I staying here will guess what surprise she was using methamphetamine I know my look in my eyes when I found out the look I never done before my 28 years from that day all she's dead to me
@kathyhayden3787
3 жыл бұрын
I've long thought that we spend a good part of our lives recovering from our childhood. I was sexually abused by an uncle until the age of 11. I buried the memories so successfully that when I started to have flashbacks in my 40's I was shocked. When I finally let the pieces of the puzzle fall into place in therapy, everything made sense. The relationships I chose, the drinking, the trust issues. My point being that there are a lot of us who are genuinely perplexed by our own behavior until the memories start to come back.
@zmoo3788
3 жыл бұрын
I am terribly sorry to hear about your childhood. I was also molested until about the same age. Im 22 years old now and I finally realized what had happened to me at about 18ish. I was on lsd and told a friend.. god man,do you remember the first time you told someone? Didnt it feel like a weight off your chest? I remember crying so hard when i told my friend, that feeling was unmeasurable. Can you tell me about your break through or epiphany if you would? Im curious how you dealt with it and if youve recovered from these memories. We are definitely a rare breed for having gone through that
@josefcosta5269
3 жыл бұрын
@@zmoo3788 You didnt know you where molested until you where 18 how come?
@savvybytes3748
3 жыл бұрын
@@josefcosta5269 Our brains and nervous systems are wired to dissociate us from experiences that are extremely horrible and painful in order for us to survive. The dissociation remains and blocks memories of the event. Even perpetrators can disassociate from their actions. Most if not all perpetrators are traumatized people as well...and so the cycle goes.
@josefcosta5269
3 жыл бұрын
@@savvybytes3748 So you mean some people dont know if they have been molested as kids because the brain has blocked it.... So how can some1 know if they hav been molested if the brain have blocked it? ...
@zmoo3788
3 жыл бұрын
@@josefcosta5269 very good question. For me, I hit almost an epiphany. And it's not like you completely forget it happened, but you realize what happened was traumatic and you relive it when youre older(after becoming more intelligent) and realize it's wrong. For example, I had blocked these memories until I talked to my friend about exposing our own secrets (we were 18 and it was a deep 5 am conversation). He told me a funny secret and I told him my molestation memories. When I told him, it sounded fucked up saying it outloud and when I saw his reaction, i cried like a baby. I realized everything that happened to me wasnt normal, I thought everyone faced difficult hardships like myself until I had this conversation with my friend. And when you remember these blocked memories, they come in a flurry, you relive it. It was a huge break through for me, it's hard to explain but thats the most accurate way I can describe it
@andikamaghardene3075
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for explanating addictions. I am an addict. No one knows my pain. How hurt I feel every day every moment of the day. I am alone. No one has yet noticed how I am functioning as a normal person. But I know I must change. Thanks once again for the enlightenment.
@MrsDinaC
3 жыл бұрын
I understand....I pray somehow you find peace. Sometimes it’s easier said then done. You are stronger than you realize ❤️
@curiodyssey3867
2 жыл бұрын
I'm right there with you. Just a hollow shell going through the motions day after day working so I can have enough to pay rent and not get sick. Terrible. I dont get paid for another 12 hours and I'm terribly sick right now. Its awful how we do this to ourselves
@fundamentalcoach
2 жыл бұрын
You are loved and you are seen, trust me: GOD SEES YOU AND EVERYONE WHO CAN SEE GOD SEES YOU. Isn’t that the utmost compliment?!
@MikkelBach-G
3 жыл бұрын
Im of alcohol& Tobacco for 6 & 4months. On a nofap journey which are going very well also. Heard this quote that make me think twice. “When i get the urge i know something else is stressing me out & i need to focus on that. It was very powerfull for myself to realise. STAYHARD!
@nidamreps
3 жыл бұрын
Thats great. Thanks for sharing and all the best for you
@1337flite
3 жыл бұрын
Stay hard? Nofap? I see what I did there.
@anitaevans5361
Жыл бұрын
I quit drinking after decades, within a year of starting trauma therapy, on my own & w/o AA. I lost my son 3 years ago, suddenly and it did provoke trauma response but there was no temptation to self-medicate. We need more professionals & resources for mental health, I don't know anyone who grows up saying that they are going to grow up to be an addict. Dr Gabor Mate', whom I've met, is a quiet hero amongst a world in denial. Thank you Dr. ❤️🔥
@josephhernandez9428
Жыл бұрын
AA has roughly a 10% success rate. I'm absolutely convinced the reason for such a low success rate is because childhood trauma is not a main focus.
@Elivina323
3 жыл бұрын
Addiction is not the problem, it's a solution to the problem. Thank you Dr. Mate..
@DfiftyMusic
3 жыл бұрын
I battle addictions, and to anyone else out there finding it hard, keep it up, you’ve made it this far already 💯
@Stall-FedCalves
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/qaJtrmSGqX57qGU
@JohnDoe-ir2ft
3 жыл бұрын
I fought addiction for many years, in and out of prison the whole nine yards. Sometime in my mid 40s I just lost my want to get high. I can't explain it or put my finger on it. I guess I just had enough. Now when a junkie asks me for money on the streets I dont judge them I give them money. I understand than even though it is killing them at least I can help them be well even if only for a moment. I have had so many friends die young, it is a sad way of life.
@Stacyannecole
3 жыл бұрын
Happy for you !! Stay on course and God Bless
@jenwendy7
3 жыл бұрын
I do the same thing. I know so many who have recovered I figure if a few bucks helps them get through the day, then I'm all for that.
@salometipsandtricks2786
3 жыл бұрын
Stop giving them money to keep being a addict. Instant talk to them. Keep talking until they come back to reality and can laugh again
@alaskaaksala123
3 жыл бұрын
@@salometipsandtricks2786 stop giving them money won’t stop them...they’ll just turn to,stealing and robbing at gun point...which would you rather have??
@eddiechimex
3 жыл бұрын
Give them food or something to wear instead
@mommaboombam3764
Жыл бұрын
I don't know how many times I have said the same words and yet no one listens. So sad bc people can heal themselves first emotionally and the addictions can be easier to over come. My heart breaks for these souls. Thank you Dr. Mate. Bless you
@josephhernandez9428
Жыл бұрын
I listened.
@delphi-moochymaker62
3 жыл бұрын
"If you lock the monster in the basement, he bides his time and lifts weights."
@martinakupcakova812
3 жыл бұрын
then don't put the weights in the basement Duh!
@dansingcow5129
3 жыл бұрын
@@martinakupcakova812 pushups?
@Kory718
3 жыл бұрын
what happens when he leaves the basement
@delphi-moochymaker62
3 жыл бұрын
@@Kory718 You face the monster and he loses his power to frighten. Keeping him locked away drains life force.
@complexjanedoe
3 жыл бұрын
If you distract yourself from pain, from the traumas they will get stronger and gain more momentum. And when they pop back up it will be extremely painful. More painful than it could of been. And then we beat ourselves up but in a way it’s not our fault we didn’t know how the brain worked or how to process pain and trauma. It’s our accountability to heal the roots of our addictions ...it requires self worth and belief in one self and that is hard when you been traumatized.
@carlac4160
3 жыл бұрын
Finally an explanation I agree with. Addiction is a response to suffering. It is a simple as that. What we all have is a broken heart, and we find what we find to help manage that broken heart.
@wk1810
3 жыл бұрын
I remember my friend's response to my having told her I had tried cocaine when I was in my early 20's. "You're lucky you didn't get addicted" she said. "No chance of that. I wasn't emotionally dependent upon it" I replied. I was an addict, cocaine just wasn't my "drug" of choice. Stunned by my response she reacted with "you know, all the years I'd been in AA, no one ever brought up the emotional part of addiction". Just from my own experience I always knew there was an emotional element to why people become addicted to some substances/activities, yet not others. The abscence of genuine love and all it contains (peace, acceptance, value, joy, dignity), drives you to seek out relief for the trauma you endure. The right questions, at the right time, and in the right manner - can be life-transforming!
@lisadixon6617
2 жыл бұрын
Well stated. This is my current experience. What my therapist says. I relapsed on pills after 14 years. But I still never drank … Until I did! We all have a story and mine was neglect and rejection. Can’t believe I haven’t “mastered” my past yet. I don’t even get the connection but I believe what my therapist says about my brain storing past pains … way in the back. Hope to connect it all one day. But even if I don’t, I pray God relieves of the bondage of myself 🙏
@wk1810
2 жыл бұрын
@@lisadixon6617 I pray for that for you, too. Thank you for sharing this with me.
@bprandomised4011
4 ай бұрын
I’m blown away each time I hear Gabor speak.
@vto7711
Жыл бұрын
Former addict myself. For me the beginning to walking out of that life ie.drugs, jail, violence, theft, etc etc. was when someone who was not like me looked past my outward appearance and believed I was worth their time even when I didn’t believe I had value. The real change came when I realized that I was valuable. I was introduced to a love that was without end and a father that was heavenly. After I asked Jesus into my heart I was shown who he was and who he is and now that he is in me then my spirit is what he is. I separated my soul from my spirit from my flesh. After that it was just a matter of identifying with my spirit over and over until my soul was tamed and my flesh was tamed. One day I dumped all my old pictures, adult videos, magazines, all of the things that pointed to my past life of carnal pleasure and burned it all. There was no way to go back to that comfort so I might as well move forward. I never got anything right all the time but now years later I can tell you you’d never know who I was based on what you see now.
@omar10213245
Жыл бұрын
that's a beautiful testimony, thank you for sharing that.
@damen0
Жыл бұрын
Wow amen. Waiting for my mother to come oht of that lifestyle
@carrieolson3352
Жыл бұрын
absolutely. A complete change in environment is a really strong step. Back in the 80's my uncle, who was a brutal alcoholic, left his family for 6 months. Went out into the woods with other addicts in a structured sort of survival course with physically strong athletic men (leading the athletic/survival course side of things), and mental health and addictions counsellors. He was a changed man when he came home. Amazing really. His entire perspective had changed after being around those with a completely different outlook on life, and of course NO opportunity to go back (within the 6 months they were hundreds of miles from civilization). He lived his best years after that. His marriage survived, his 3 kids loved him, he was a great uncle, brother, father, contributor to society. Sincerely happy and joyful for the rest of his life. And a great testament that anything is possible. Prior to the survival course he entered, he lost his business, lost his house, and lost his family. He was sick, and regularly endangering himself with casual intimacy with random strangers/women. He was not religious, but he was a spiritual dude. Love and miss him.
@godschildse
Жыл бұрын
yes jesus is the way
@texasislandgal4754
3 жыл бұрын
So true once I shared my childhood trauma I started to heal and have been clean for 2.5 yrs after a 20 yr marijuana habit.
@ericshiel
Жыл бұрын
I love that one of the segments explains that addiction isn’t a choice. Such a beautiful thing considering the societal stigmas claiming that addicts create their own graves.
@kellykizer6718
3 жыл бұрын
My mother was a heroin addict for 20 years and a lot of addiction is fueled by trauma but sometimes it is because the person loves the pleasure inducing properties of the drugs and have just a pure relationship with the drug and love how it tickles the pleasure centers of their brain, sometimes trauma has nothing to do with it, they just like getting high and that's part of it to and for some that's all of it.
@HominisLupis
3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely spot on. Every addict isn’t traumatized or whatever, sometimes the pleasure center of their brain has simply been hijacked by a feeling so powerful, that they crave it. End of story.
@MrBadintentionss
3 жыл бұрын
@@HominisLupis and then the viscous circle begins because when you're not on your drug of choice, you like yourself less and less.
@robynthriftsvintage82
3 жыл бұрын
A deeply empathetic and compassionate man. It boggles the mind how society can judge substance abuse as they gorge on food, sex, consumerism, work, alcohol, netflix.. I mean the list goes on and on as to what we use nowadays to escape and numb ourselves.
@kimlarso
2 жыл бұрын
Remember: what others say/think about you often times has nothing to do w U= it’s suppression, repression, projection & judging is just another form of escaping their own addiction that’s either hidden & denied or sociably acceptable such as working exercising = addiction in and of itself isn’t bad, it’s the addict and the consequences of having such addiction
@katerinaa.5032
Жыл бұрын
Addiction is one of the hardest challenges I am facing is my addiction I was going to get 5 months clean today and I relapsed last night. I was doing so good I was so happy like really feeling true happiness I momentarily I forgot that I have an incurable disease I learned my lesson this sickness is always alive and waiting to take advantage of me when I let my guard down. I have learned that I will always be a sick person. I am going to break the cycle of generations every family member I have has died of drug or alcohol use.
@designchik
Жыл бұрын
His approach to addiction is so compassionate. I never really thought much about this stuff until I became emotionally dependent on prescription benzodiazepines. My dad was an alcoholic, and I did my share of drinking in my 20s, but I stopped when I began blacking out. It was easy because I never liked the taste of alcohol. It didn’t occur to me that I might have a predisposition to addiction. However, when I became severely depressed later, I began extra dosing with the benzos originally prescribed for anxiety and insomnia. That’s the first time I experienced what it’s like to zone out of the pain that was my life at the time, and man, I loved how they made me feel. I began extra dosing more and more and lying about why I was going through my prescriptions so quickly. I eventually started planning my weekends around my drug use. I finally had to be hospitalised to manage the withdrawal when my shrink pulled the plug on the benzos. But I remember thinking if this is what heroin feels like, I totally get why people take it. The experience completely altered the way I think about addiction and addicts, and I have a lot more compassion now.
@agceh
11 ай бұрын
I did a lot of drugs in my life, speed, flakka, cocaine, GHB, tramadol, oxycodin, alcohol. But the thing that maked me a real addict were the benzos, oh that stuff just got me and made me feel like a real addict for the first time, the brutal withdrawals multi-day blackouts, seizures.. no not that 'dangerous' illegal street drugs, nope the legal presscription drugs. Now im clean and in recovery.
@designchik
11 ай бұрын
@@agceh I hear you. Sometimes the cure really is worse than the disease. I’m glad you’re doing well now and are in recovery. Much love to you. ❤️
@philbarone4603
3 жыл бұрын
I was a heroin addict and alcoholic for decades. Finally went to AA for twenty-five years and eventually left. Now I meditate twice a day, read the Tao Te Ching everyday and give back as much as I can. Gabor is right, it’s not a disease, it’s caused by suffering.
@benzobrimzs
2 жыл бұрын
Can I ask why you stopped AA after 25 years ?
@lauraannecharbonneauanne1516
Жыл бұрын
@@benzobrimzs the approach is wrong.
@benzobrimzs
Жыл бұрын
@@lauraannecharbonneauanne1516 wow it took it me 25 minutes before I worked that out I left the meeting at the cigarette break . I think it's a cult of shaming that uses mind games . That's just the tip of the iceberg. Glad u made it out fr. You don't need that codependent toxicity to live a healthy life Edit I was about 24 when I attended that half a meeting, can I ask how old u were when u started going to meetings ? I'm interested as it seems that the younger u get in the cult the less likelihood u have of changing your belief system .
@sonnyboy5566
Жыл бұрын
@@lauraannecharbonneauanne1516 I feel 12 steps are useful but they are not a panacea as some people in the fellowship believe. I attend AA but the disease model does not sit well with me. I can say that for me was and can still be a great form of support and I occasionally attend meetings. After 16 years and worked the steps as best as I could, I feel that certain traumas have not healed and need something else. This is only my experience and take on AA.
@sookibeulah9331
Жыл бұрын
Many in 12 Steps use the word as a dis-ease, as in a lack of ease with self, which fits perfectly with Mate's approach. The HOW programs in the behavioural 12 step fellowships (I don’t know if it’s used in substance fellowships) really look at trauma.
@mrdevinmanuel
3 жыл бұрын
I had a good upbringing, good support system from family, friends and here I am. Addicted to oxycodone. I'm 34 with a wife and daughter that I need to care for. Everyday, every minute I feel like I need SOMETHING to get through the day. It doesn't help that I'm stressed and depressed. Covid has taken my job and my future looks bleak. Addiction is a mother fucker and one day I hope to make it though the day with my thoughts not leading me down the rabbit hole.
@occipitalneuralgia2339
3 жыл бұрын
Whenever anyone says that , I ask, What p led you to using in the first place? What was going on at the time?” After weeks, or months, the truth finally comes out. Hope you get some counseling, and please tell those prescribing doctors about your self described addiction. There are also free online zoom meetings for those with substance addiction during Covid. Start building yourself a healthier support network. Please.
@realeyesrealiserealliesful2957
3 жыл бұрын
I believe addiction is caused by over stimulation from birth we r distracted by toys, people, bottle, dummy, tv, music, food ECT... We don't know what boredom is and we r over orally stimulated bottle/breast, dummy, teething ring, food ECT... I went from bottle/dummy to food/sucking thumb to biting my nails to smoking then drinking and drugs I never had a bad childhood i was a spoilt only child i literally thought that the world was here for me
@seanikan
3 жыл бұрын
@@realeyesrealiserealliesful2957 I'm sorry about your addiction, however don't think there's any positive correlation there.
@trippettfamily4686
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks for sharing Mr. Devin. How are you?
@YeniferAlarcon-z5c
3 ай бұрын
The road to sobriety is a hard one. I haven't smoked weed for a whole month now and I've also quit social media... I am bored now more often than not but it is guiding to resort to healthier habits to relieve my pain, such as writing, dancing and meditating by the water. Stay strong!
@Tammissa
2 жыл бұрын
That was the best description of addiction I’ve ever heard . This guy gets it.
@joeblack3878
3 жыл бұрын
This is great. I’ve been dealing with multiple addictions throughout all my life. My side project has been to fix my head. I don’t smoke anymore (started when I was 12), I don’t drink anymore (started when I was 14… 20 months sober), over came prescription pills after I was blown up and shot in Iraq, and not I’m working on the last one… the shadow. Great perspective!
@zoodidwa
3 жыл бұрын
I've always thought most addiction is a symptom.
@TheThnikkaman1234
3 жыл бұрын
A symptom of someone taking substance to feel better, but not actually take the steps in life to naturally feel better. It's a shortcut to feel better in life without actually working for it.
@occipitalneuralgia2339
3 жыл бұрын
@@TheThnikkaman1234 I disagree with you. Or should say, that’s all to destructively simple. I’ve known many people with severe addictions that work harder than the rest of the population in all ways to cope, to survive, to try and get out of their addictions. They just have such a hard time, whereas it’s all easier for the rest of society. Some make it, but some give up because the struggle is just so damn hard.
@calchip
3 жыл бұрын
@@TheThnikkaman1234 That's an oversimplification of a much more nuanced and complicated process.
@Silverfoxy50
Жыл бұрын
As a single parent of three kids, i thought i spent all my life protecting my children from harm, but listening to this, i was probably part of the stress and trauma on my kids. Only one is an addict and could never really figure it out. But i was unhappy and stressed when they were small, it is an eye opener.
@brandonbrown4507
Жыл бұрын
He literally just told me why I’m at this very moment tho I’m ashamed to say I’m addicted to alcohol and drugs myself. He just said what happened to me in my life and how I tried to handle it and what my consequences were. He also made me think very deeply and now I can honestly say I know that I can get over my problems and be productive
@SunShine-qm7hu
10 ай бұрын
Such brave words, my friend! I wish you the best of luck in your decision 🙏🏽
@SonicVibe
3 жыл бұрын
Its an attempt to escape suffering temporary damn i felt that. 😞
@lisam4879
2 жыл бұрын
Reading "The Body Keeps the Score" gave me such a good understanding of just how pervasive trauma is in society and how poorly funded the treatment models are. Nonetheless it was a fascinating read and Gabor Maté touched on a lot of points raised in the book. I'd recommend it to anyone who wants to understand more about trauma and how it manifests in later life. I hope more people will read on the subject and ultimately be more compassionate towards each other.
@louiselysa
2 жыл бұрын
There’s another way to get healing that cost nothing, Jesus Christ
@disney.daze.55
Жыл бұрын
I’ve read maybe half of that book and had to put it down. It’s a lot to take in.
@lisam4879
Жыл бұрын
@@louiselysa Each to their own ❤️
@SunShine-qm7hu
10 ай бұрын
Such a warm message to remind us to stay human with that inner compassion. Thank you!!!
@danaworsley3921
3 жыл бұрын
This bought tears to my eyes because it is so true. A person that has been thru this is not understood and the pain you feel and the shame you feel is hard to escape so you find a way...
@densonfletcher8612
3 жыл бұрын
I look for a way every day just to make it w/ out the pain... then after awhile or years you realize you’re addicted and try to remember why you started or what pain
@Stall-FedCalves
3 жыл бұрын
kzitem.info/news/bejne/qaJtrmSGqX57qGU
@soothingmeditationmusic1699
3 жыл бұрын
“A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.”
@linneajohnson5362
3 жыл бұрын
Never so simple my friend. Lol!
@sidimightbe
3 жыл бұрын
I admire failure, people who fail and die that way had their reasons and its sad to watch them leave
@DJ-sr9yq
3 жыл бұрын
This is the most knowledgeable and educated person I’ve ever heard speak about addiction.. this man knows what he’s talking about.
@bigtoe89
2 жыл бұрын
I know why I'm an addict. My dad passed away from alcohol when I was 5 and I grew up for 10 years with a physically, and verbally abusive step dad. A child needs love and positive reinforcement while their mind is developing for them to grow in to a confident and functional adult. I suffer with depression and anxiety. I've gone to get help, but counselling and various anti depressants/SSI's haven't worked at all so I chose to self medicate with cocaine, mdma, weed, lsd, alcohol and anything else I can get hold of to try get rid of the overwhelming feeling of hopelessness. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Drugs are the only thing I look forward to, anything that alters my perception of myself and reality. I know that I need to stop but I don't have the willpower to do it. I'm 32 and have struggled with this for the last 14 years and feel like I'll be stuck in this cycle forever.
@benjoenjozero17
3 ай бұрын
Your story from 2 years ago basically sums up my exact situation today. 9 hours clean contemplating if I can handle feeling my feelings without drink and drugs. Wondering how you are doing and how your recovery journey is going?? Love from a brother in NZ
@MayThereBeWorldPeace
Жыл бұрын
I know three addicts intimately. Everything you say about trauma exactly applies to each of them. They have suffered immensely and doctors along with society, continue to brutally punish them. 💔
@UN1VERS3S
Жыл бұрын
To be honest, I don't agree with some of his statements. Addiction is not only caused by Deficenies or suffering. It's also caused by extremes. You can see many spoiled brats getting addicted to videogames as a child and party drugs as a teen. You can see people whose very happy and comfortable get addicted to alcohol, they use it not to alleviate their pain, but just for mere enjoyment.
@BenJanisch
3 жыл бұрын
"We can guide people to healing if we ask the right questions". Sounds like good 12 step sponsorship to me
@olusijimark
3 жыл бұрын
Porn addiction included.
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
What kind of trauma of any kind, did one suffer to get addicted to porn ? I would say hardly any. Definitely the opposite to what people suffered in this video.
@dominicmontez5533
3 жыл бұрын
Hurting your wife or husband over and over again is pretty traumatizing. I love my wife, but I grew up with an addiction, and those two fight for a place in my life. There can’t be both only one or the other. The heartbreak and stomach turning sickness she’s been through when she found out I was cheating on her is plenty trauma. Yea, it didn’t kill me or break my brain, but its still a serious problem that can rip lives apart just like drugs. Make up whatever excuse you want, you obviously have never faced the real life consequences of being addicted to porn.
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
@Sasha 99% of people who are addicted to porn did not suffer sexual trauma from childhood. It was the addiction that took on a life of its own. It sounds like there has to be a link from addiction to childhood trauma but that's just an excuse.
@shah6421
3 жыл бұрын
Highly agreed.
@FlySpleen
3 жыл бұрын
@@Matlockization Childhood trauma is a big combination of words. I think what's trying to be conveyed is that addiction is a symptom and not a manifestation of it's own. The more you are satisfied in your life and the more you have capabilities to overcome accruing insults, then the likelihood that you'll get addicted to something decreases. At least, that's what I understood and feel.
@MarkandSandieInMotion
Жыл бұрын
I've been trying to understand addiction, to understand why a loved one uses. This explanation is more palatable, you don't discuss the search for a higher power to resolve the issue but search the core, the reason why there is so much pain, where it originates. Thank you.
@billyandrews4728
Жыл бұрын
I sought a H.P. to help me deal with those core traumas that led to my addiction.
@TheCrazyCloon
Жыл бұрын
Higher Power works for some but not all. The most important thing is to not try a one-size-fits-all solution. One reason why AA/NA fails for so many is it's forced religious aspect.
@autumnmartin4993
Жыл бұрын
I’m an addict and just wanted to say thank you for trying to understand, a lot of people don’t. My mom was an addict and I tried to understand but never fully could and then when I went through it my mind was so opened to how it’s truly torture. If you ever want to talk to hear my story or try to understand more I’d love to talk
@conflectiz
3 жыл бұрын
Wow. Amazing. I’m addicted to hiking & summiting mountains now. When I was lost I used, when I found myself I started walking away.
@bonethugsfiend
3 жыл бұрын
I read this guys book, "In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts.". Most of these addicts have the saddest life stories. Its no wonder they are using drugs to escape.
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
In our beloved socialist progressive society they say the answer is to call these people victims. Instead if you call them survivors, then there is an air of positivity about their situation and thus an incentive for them to help themselves or others to help them get off drugs.
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
@Sheila Mchgee Well, have they tried everything other than drugs ?
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
@Sheila Mchgee Have people really tried all the therapies out there ? Is the current addiction taking away their will to motivate themselves to act ? The first step is to get off these drugs to lessen the affect of addiction thereby coming closer to reality.
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
@Sheila Mchgee Anything except additive drugs.
@Matlockization
3 жыл бұрын
@Sheila Mchgee It really depends on what the problem is to start with. I'm not saying that one can be totally free of pain killers. So a small sustained dose is best. But the medical fraternity seem to dish them out like theirs no tomorrow. It depends on the severity of the pain. I understand its hard to think straight when people rely on pain killers to function esp if they have cancer or a disorder. However, thats not what this video is about. If people have suffered a trauma then its best to work thought it below the addiction threshold, that way they have a clearer head and are more open to allow health profession stepping in. This might sound like a tall order for them as their old reality comes apart but in time they can reach out to someone then slowly move in the right direction. So its a big change of attitude & values for them. In effect their life might be on hold for a short time but the benefits are great. They just need a mentor who can motivate & support them as they move out of the tunnel and towards the light.
@jessicaabbassi1140
3 жыл бұрын
As an addict this is spot on🙌 healing my trauma is what has helped me more than anything. 🙏💜 its not as accessible or affordable as it should he or needs to be. Mental health period is seperatrd from physical well being which they go hand in hand. For me my trauma and abuse I went through is the root of my addiction, definitely is pain that caused it and causes it.
@ryanshannon4490
11 ай бұрын
This guy is beyond brilliant. He has a great mind. I only wish people like him would want to become leaders in this world and others were smart enough to start a movement in the right direction. However I feel too much of this world is already f***** to the point beyond help and others are too lazy to join in the fight. I thank you for this video and it has opened my eyes immensely. Keep publishing great work like this. You have the utmost respect from me and many others I'm sure. Thank you for sharing your work and research.
@mooskamoo
3 жыл бұрын
One very important factor in many people's addiction - good old fashioned boredom. The mundane grind of life was the primary factor for mine and many of my friends substance abuse. None of us were particularly traumatised, abused or neglected, but growing up in the 80s we were certainly bored and took drugs simply to make life more exciting and interesting.
@demonprincess2045
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah and non addicts know that drugs should be taken occasionally, not everyday. Not even every month. And to be sure your shit is safe. But addicts they find their one true love whatever that is and they get chasing the dragon until they're physically and mentally dependent on some substance, or even food. Drugs aren't meant to be taken everyday. Unless you're in chronic pain, which is a whole other level of suffering. It's a complicated situation.
@toms4022
2 жыл бұрын
Yes, like many people that did not start drugs because of some trauma from childhood. They started drugs because they wanted to know what it was like or because their friends seem to enjoy it. Most people start taking drugs at a young age out of curiosity.. what Gabor mate claims is just not backed up by any data, only around 13% of drug addicts had extremely traumatic childhoods. But what Gabor mate says is so simple because no matter what all children experience trauma, it's how you develop resilience. So it's very easy to say, you become addicted due to childhood trauma and if you can't remember any trauma just keep looking because no matter what you have experienced it. He has put together a great story that makes it simple for people to absolve themselves from responsibility.
@lisadixon6617
2 жыл бұрын
Agreed! Nothing worse than idle time. Get busy!!
@MrBadintentionss
3 жыл бұрын
i embraced drugs and alcohol in my 20's and 30's because there was nothing more attractive to me than getting away from myself. i had a dark childhood. in my 40's i started doing something which resulted in an enormous shift in my life. i found a doctor i trusted, started seeing a counsellor, and opened up about things i had never talked about to anyone before. instead of trying to claw my way up a muddy, slippery slope where i couldn't see the place i was trying to get to, i eventually came to look down on my problems instead of being imprisoned by them. critical to my success was replacing alcohol with the discipline and structure of a rapidly accelerating exercise regime. you have to fill in your time constructively and with purpose. i'm 53 now and i'm a lean-muscled cardio machine who has also educated himself on nutrition. i'm absolutely driven and i love it. the alcohol is still a seductress, but i don't beat myself up about it because i've already outlived my life expectancy considering what i've been through. when you've experienced the kind of trauma i have, you really have to chip away at moving ahead in a positive manner, but it can become a landslide when it moves in the other direction because it's just impossible for me to love myself. there is never a balance where that 'tug of war' doesn't move in one direction or the other. never.
@Hallelujur
3 жыл бұрын
I am so very happy for you!! And it gives me hope for a family member. 🙏🏽
@MrBadintentionss
3 жыл бұрын
@@Hallelujur thanks very much. all the best with your family member.
@kinneydyt
3 жыл бұрын
"Human connection is the antidote to addiction" Johann Hari
@justinemackey6033
Ай бұрын
As a severely abused child, by my mother, who was an extreme narcissist and violent , alcoholic and addict, I turned to drugs and alcohol to numb the pain. I couldn’t understand why my mother hated me. She beat me daily. Told me I was ugly and nobody would ever love me. I bore both physical and extreme emotional scars. I was active for over 30 years. In and out of jail, promiscuity, robbing and stealing. I was so grateful to firstly, find the Rooms and secondly, and most importantly, finding a psychologist who specialized in EMDR (eye movement desensitization), which focuses on the trauma and then releases the memory, forever. We can recover and we can move on from the trauma of childhood abuse. I pray for anyone who is struggling. Bless you Dr. Mate, for your work and tirelessly dedicating your career to helping those struggling with recovery. Addiction is truly a result of trauma and unending pain. We can overcome!
@1337flite
3 жыл бұрын
I think psychiatrists and psychologists do make at least a cursory examination of life events, but they just don 't do anything with it or understand it's links to addiction. Its really amazing that we treat doctos like they're reallly smart but they cant see the patterns like violent parents, parental rejection and various types of abuse are present in virtually all addicts.
@sandrawilson8337
Жыл бұрын
Well said. After years of study, I traced my addiction back to childhood trauma. There are many layers to an onion.
@scapethegoat.
Жыл бұрын
After being through all of this myself I can say that’s exactly what is happening. You don’t take the conscious decision to take drugs. Its just a door that opens up for you and you escape into it.
@fmj9346
Жыл бұрын
Brilliant. I am a recovering alcoholic. Relapsed after 30 yrs after my cruel mother died. Too much pain which hadn’t been dealt with. Sober and clean now and very strong, stronger than I have ever been. Dealt with the pain, feel free finally and at peace. Easiest way is to go through the darkness, the loneliness. Eventually it ceases to be.
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