1. Sex Life 2. Private conversations with friends to a partner 3. Dont talk badly about one colleague to another (colleagues are not friends) 4. Dont discuss private life with colleagues 5. Don’t share anything that isnt concrete yet 6. Dont share things that are in the early stage; things might not always work out!
@RememberTheLord
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for posting!!! ❤
@mariem2344
Жыл бұрын
Amazing 🎉🎉🎉
@OraclesofDarkStarr
7 ай бұрын
Thank you ❤
@sandejack
Жыл бұрын
Not sharing my business with anyone got to be the best thing I've decided to do.
@friimunya8488
Жыл бұрын
For real girl. Frenemies everywhere
@Kari_Michele
Жыл бұрын
I agree 💯💯💯💯💯
@saterahacham8351
Жыл бұрын
I think it's a contradiction because these very people can support your business
@drinks274
Жыл бұрын
Sometimes not even your partner ýou can trust
@Blackbrabx
Жыл бұрын
Facts💖💖
@CarasPlace
Жыл бұрын
Moving in silence is golden. Others can’t disrupt what they don’t know about. ✨
@Blessed_Daye
Жыл бұрын
So true!
@elianna67
Жыл бұрын
So true and you hold all the power
@DeeandTee_London
Жыл бұрын
Our colleagues are NEVER our friends. I learnt that the hard way in my 20's.
@iyescorner862
Жыл бұрын
What isn’t concrete shouldn’t be shared. 👌🏾👌🏾
@SheriK926
Жыл бұрын
❤agreed and this is getting me my dream falling in place 🎉a day at a time
@alliyhvs7514
Жыл бұрын
English isn’t my first language, i dont get what u meant by concrete? Like what is not real?
@Tunde_
Жыл бұрын
@@alliyhvs7514 ‘Set in stone’ or guaranteed
@roshi8955
Жыл бұрын
@@alliyhvs7514 for example, you're thinking about starting a business. Don't share the idea UNTIL your business is up and running. Because people are quick to turn into business consultant and give unsolicited advices because “their aunties started a business and it failed”
@kuwsyd
Жыл бұрын
Living in privacy has brung me so much peace
@lahlahluv8380
Жыл бұрын
Truth
@mizumi8462
Жыл бұрын
Brought*
@taliatale3629
Жыл бұрын
😂 😂
@dallypurcy3113
Жыл бұрын
@@mizumi8462😂😂
@theetiara
Жыл бұрын
My body naturally becomes silent around people I don’t feel comfortable around
@mimi19921
Жыл бұрын
I couldn’t agree more with this. I remember going out for drinks after work with colleagues and everyone was sharing their own personal lives and relationships… at the end of the day we are not friends. I almost felt compelled to share but then I was like no I have my family and friends for that.
@sadecoco1502
Жыл бұрын
So proud of you. I just recently got trapped into sharing something personal with an inlaw. I kept quiet and just let her share her details, gave her an ear but didn't share anything in return. People will use your personal things against you later on.
@nadiagrssn
Жыл бұрын
reason why I never like after works lolll
@mimi19921
Жыл бұрын
@@sadecoco1502 this is so true honestly
@sky_rae7062
Жыл бұрын
@@sadecoco1502 true
@lisaainembabazi9878
Жыл бұрын
Wow
@sadecoco1502
Жыл бұрын
I used to be so scared of 'awkward silent' moments. Not anymore. If you think the silence is awkward, forget me speaking about something personal just for the sake of conversation 😅😂.
@okuhlentuli9093
Жыл бұрын
You're me for real... I realised I also over share just to make another person comfortable or be relatable... Thank god I'm stopping all that all together.
@KFSBonder
Жыл бұрын
To kill the silence usually we do "small talk"; not DEEP talk
@Snailmail1
Жыл бұрын
@@okuhlentuli9093 this is me too. It’s almost like I feel obligated too and maybe they don’t even care to hear it. Do you have advice on how to stop? Thanks
@Snailmail1
Жыл бұрын
This is me now. Can I ask how you overcame it? And if possible could you explain the last sentence? Does it mean if someone thinks the silence with you is awkward then they don’t deserve to be told something personal? Sorry for all the questions
@okuhlentuli9093
Жыл бұрын
I let the person lead the conversation especially if they're talkative lol I forgot about this video your comment brought me back... Just a few days ago I met someone new an acquaintance and I let her lead the conversation... Honestly I'm super impulsive lol so attentively listening and deciphering what to say and what not to say is saving my arse😂😂😂
@TaylorWinter
Жыл бұрын
This topic reminds me of the lady who recently went viral on TikTok for exposing her husbands cheating. People started harassing his job & she made a video asking people to stop because she is a stay at home wife and relies solely on his income. Knowing this, it’s crazy she told strangers her personal business in the 1st place knowing she solely relies on him. People feed too much into the internet, at any age.
@chaelmarcial428
Жыл бұрын
Good gracious, what a disaster that is.
@taytayshaniqua.8686
Жыл бұрын
Now that is a very insane thing to do
@LoveAndSnapple
Жыл бұрын
Yes, I remember her! She almost found hersefl on the streets! Like, as far as the audience goes why would they take it upon themselves to harrass this man at his job as if that would change the outcome? And as far as she's concerned, what was telling the audience going to do? This isn't the EARLY times of the internet when you could just talk about something and get it off of your chest. In fact, I don't think anyone was exposing themselves and their family members like this back then.
@eternalabundance39
Жыл бұрын
Her emotions took over. Hard lessons she learned.
@eternalabundance39
Жыл бұрын
@@LoveAndSnappleif her audience really could help: send her money to get independent and tell her of resources to assist.
@Nat-mw3bz
Жыл бұрын
Move in Silence, Act in Divine Wisdom, Let the Holy Spirit move you.
@hikerhobby1204
11 ай бұрын
Amen❤
@suea8006
Жыл бұрын
I’m very careful with what I share with married friends or friends in intimate relationships. I only share information which I’m comfortable with their partners knowing because I know they’ll eventually tell them.
@tosin1018
Жыл бұрын
I really need to put this to practice. So true!
@friimunya8488
Жыл бұрын
Girl sooo true
@saywhatondat
Жыл бұрын
Yes!!!
@mezakkia
Жыл бұрын
Excellent point!
@diplomat2623
Жыл бұрын
Great point!! I forget about that.
@faybury4428
Жыл бұрын
I've learned to be private and silent around certain people especially those I thought were my real friends. Sometimes silence is also distancing oneself from certain people.
@OhJodii
Жыл бұрын
The best thing I kept to myself was my pregnancy and baby let me tell you , if you didn't see it it didn't happen lol ! I don't even post my son , you might hear him or see a piece of him but nah all mine ! Cause everybody isn't happy for you !
@userysl
Жыл бұрын
This!!!
@lasantuzza777
Жыл бұрын
girl exactly some ppl even talk bad ab me for not sharing my son online.. i’m like, tell me why you’re mad you can’t have access into my personal life! i protect the things that mean the most to me which is exactly why you’re not gonna see my husband, children, or fam in general on social media period
@ayosawyerr513
Жыл бұрын
Yeah... Not everyone is happy for you Got me 😊
@CS-bu7lo
Жыл бұрын
In my region in southeastern Europe, women are adviced to keep their pregnancy a secret in the first trimester when most miscarriages occur. Of course their partners, doctors and sometimes employers have to know and maybe some very close friends and family members, but not others.
@LucyLucy296
Жыл бұрын
12:26 "The early stage of anything is not promised. Something that begins, could end. Abruptly."
@CS-bu7lo
Жыл бұрын
Yes, and this is why in my region of southeastern Europe women are adviced to keep their pregnancy a secret in the first trimester, when most miscarriages occur. Of course, their partners, doctors and sometimes employers have to know and maybe some close friends and family, but not others.
@FloralTraphouse
Жыл бұрын
Being silent has really changed my life I love it here
@ViRosewood
Жыл бұрын
I think some people overshare in an attempt to connect with people. I have been in many embarrassing moments like that and despite having to have dealt with it many times, I still get a brain freeze wondering why one would share such privy information.
@lasantuzza777
Жыл бұрын
yes. i used to overshare because my mother was very neglectful and disconnected my whole life. i look back and see how i was just longing for some connection and validation. but doing it that way is superficial and can be dangerous or make you a target. privacy is a great protection
@devoutmisanthrope5687
Жыл бұрын
From my experiences of people oversharing with me, I think a lot of people don't have close, vetted friends to confide in and just want somebody to listen and understand what they're going through. Most of the strangers who've overshared with me were either elderly (and thus might not have any remaining family or friends) or were estranged from their families.
@ViRosewood
Жыл бұрын
@@lasantuzza777 Glad to hear you have gained some valuable insight into your past behavior and the reasons behind it.
@seleciaa
Жыл бұрын
Yup. I heard a colleage speaking poorly on another, and now I keep my conversations with him to a minimum. I already maintain my privacy with coworkers. I really, really dislike gossip.
@earthangel8399
Жыл бұрын
Agreed.... over sharing....especially on social media.... just makes you a target.... needing constant attention and validation from total strangers is very unhealthy.... no one will respect you until you respect yourself
@relleyy
Жыл бұрын
Made the mistake of telling people that I was dating someone, the constant questions were killing me especially when I hadn't figured everything out yet. Never again, I'll tell one friend for safety reasons but that's about it
@Snailmail1
Жыл бұрын
What were they asking if you don’t mind? I would also get annoyed
@wicunaacampbell
Жыл бұрын
@@Snailmail1 It’s the constant unwanted comments as well.
@wicunaacampbell
Жыл бұрын
@@Snailmail1 Im not the commenter, but I would get questions asked about the future. When this, when that, etc. What’s his job? What’s his height? Then judge if he’s not tall enough, or doesn’t meet THEIR needs.
@NoneYa-pg6dk
Жыл бұрын
You have every right to set your boundaries, but have you reflected on yourself? Could it be that you tend to date people with red flags? Some people are nosy and some are concerned or they’re just trying to get to know you. I get offended but at the end of the day, it’s my choice, so why build a wall, especially if it’s people you trust.
@ColleahG
Жыл бұрын
Yes it’s the constant questioning that would bother me, too. Conversations are sometimes draining and can introduce doubt with all of the questioning.
@user-db6el7eb9p
Жыл бұрын
Any human person you share your business with won't help you. Can't help you. Share with GOD and everything will be settled. The day I started to share everything with God was the day my life changed to the better. Forget about human
@Sylvia_blissful-balance
Жыл бұрын
Silence is very important, am someone who doesn’t talk much and not talking much has really saved me from so many situations. However, life doesn’t have to be controlled by so many rules. If u are hurt or traumatized by any situation, then,it is important to talk about it with the people u have some amount of trust. Been able to talk about a situation that is bordering u is very important to your mental health. If people think they can use ur story to shame u tomorrow, then it is up to them. I don’t think life should be made of too many rules, life is not that serious.
@briasa4357
Жыл бұрын
well said
@TiondaRae
Жыл бұрын
Yeah but be careful with trauma dumping. That’s why emotional consent for those on the receiving end is a must. It’s exhausting. Also, a therapist can help with that. Just saying.
@skyythepacifist
Жыл бұрын
I be feeling secretive… but I have to learn that being private doesn’t equate to keeping things from people
@akinkuolieomorinsola6683
Жыл бұрын
I was foolish enough to share too much too soon and I got persecuted, disrespected and sacked .
@afuaansah1184
Жыл бұрын
Those who don't share and live in silence also suffer in silence.
@marigoldbeam5475
Жыл бұрын
You are correct, but you should choose who to share with and when to share judiciously.
@princessm2893
Жыл бұрын
@@marigoldbeam5475 💯
@euniceombogo5712
Жыл бұрын
Some even die
@federicatorrente9121
Жыл бұрын
it all resides in WHAT you share. we're not talking about not sharing what makes you suffer, but rather not sharing things that should remain private. it's different.
@ruthbavani
Жыл бұрын
I realized I was posting way too much and getting zero things done..like if I say I'd do A, I lose the zeal to follow through. I have made a promise to myself to go off my social for 6 months, just go quiet and not posting anything for the sake of my peace of mind. I'm excited for what I'll achieve in these 6 months of putting my head down. It's not easy not posting but I've placed some measures in place to keep me on the right track
@rodneybost6073
Жыл бұрын
I havent posted in years. Been so peaceful
@heartspeaks
Жыл бұрын
Babyyyyy alllllll of this is why I no longer have a “Bestie”, sister girl, have close female friends or trust folks! Betrayal is a hellacious drug! I’m still healing!
@dalidacm140
Жыл бұрын
Same here. It was my sister who expose my life on social media one day. I was broken and still am till today. I no longer trust anyone around me
@Erica-cf1xb
Жыл бұрын
To both of you ladies...I pray that God heals your wounded hearts from the betrayal of disloyal people. He saw your pain and felt your heartache. There is a natural grieving process that must be done. In due time, you will attract Godly friends. Please do not let those people keep you from sharing You with others. Focus on being your own bestie now and forever. God is healing the land right now. I'll be praying for your heart as well. In Jesus name. Amen. ❤️🙏🏾❤️
@geovanellytorres5408
Жыл бұрын
My goal is to not overly share now 🥺 and be more careful in who I trust. Thank you for the wisdom 🫶🏽
@marigoldbeam5475
Жыл бұрын
A Nigerian, Igbo, friend of mine, whom I ironically met through work, once advised me to not talk about my plans at work. Something I had considered to be networking and seeking mentorship. I had applied for a senior role, one I could do with my hands tied behind my back, several times and not been successful. I was bewildered by her advice, the idea that people can wish someone they hardly know ill, but stopped sharing my career goals with colleagues and applied for the next opportunity silently. I got the role. She also introduced me to the concept of 'village people' who wish you no good. Again her words proved portentous, as I later learned the hard way that even some relatives can harbour jealousy and wish you ill. These are unfortunate realities, but realities that we must come to grips with nonetheless.
@sadecoco1502
Жыл бұрын
Should I ever get pregnant, I have always said. I will not share it until my partner and I agree that it is time. We will enjoy the moment alone. I swear if you see me pregnant, I will deny it.
@OhJodii
Жыл бұрын
Lol , I feel you ! Hunnie no one knew I was pregnant unless they saw me with a belly! I actually saw a friend who was visiting and she was like I see you post but girl you moving in silence . I loved how the few ppl who did know stayed on code . Until I wanted to share with the world. I didn't want to hear any pregnancy negativity nor the videos ppl share just because you're pregnant ... yess I'm pregnant but I am a person aside from the life I'm carrying. Needless to say no one knew baby was coming until I was 2 months away lol (no baby shower either , no stress lol )
@dalidacm140
Жыл бұрын
Thanks for this. Just confirmed that I am not the only one who thinks this
@miimonalisa
Жыл бұрын
I was pregnant in 2021 and no one knew until I was 5 months. I would’ve waited longer…. Everyone was so shocked. Most people were glad but my partners mom made it about her and was annoyed she didn’t know know right away. People speak bad over you and you really have to be careful with who you share your happiness with .
@Eica.t.s
Жыл бұрын
Often not even the doctors or psychiatrist know the answer… sometimes the answers lie within, #Selflove
@Shannete572
Жыл бұрын
Exactly amen 🙏 a private life is a private life. Not everyone needs to know
@TheJesusMirror
Жыл бұрын
yes love this so much especially the colleague point! God tells us to guard our hearts for a reason. I remember working in a backstabbing retail environment and felt so relieved that I never shared I was an influencer for God for the whole 2 years! Protect what is precious to you guys xox
@ley2037
Жыл бұрын
ahh i love this! God bless you girly! i have trouble over sharing currently but this video really gave me encouragement and especially looking at it through a biblical way is so good :) .
@rue.eudoxie
Жыл бұрын
Finally Christian’s in these comments always feeling so alone. Gonna check out your channel x
@name0055
Жыл бұрын
I think if you have problems sometimes you need to talk with someone about it. That can be the second step to healing (first step talk with God.) Obviously you talk with someone who you can trust. But my problem was often that I kept things in my heart thinking it will be alright. Yes the problem did go alright, but I get used to, to let the pain in me and get more insecure in my heart. After a while I just began to cry all out, but it was still in my heart. Speaking with my sisters in Christ and they praying for me was a absolutely game changer. Without them I never could figure out how to describe my feelings in words. Also God protected my soul, we know all people and my sisters are not perfect. But to trust God to open up with things was really good, I just didn’t learn things about myself, but also from others. Sometimes we scared to do it. I did not watch the video honestly but I want to let this comment here. btw my English is not that good. Greetings from Germany
@AnnAdeva1
Жыл бұрын
I am sooooooo glad I stumbled on this video. I have been this way all my life and I even went to therapy because people around me would keep complaining about this. But let me tell you the peace that I enjoy with this privacy? UNMATCHED!! I do not feel pressure from anyone and I can change my mind and take my Ls privately with no stress.
@Blessed_Daye
Жыл бұрын
It upsets people when they don't know all of your business! I'm introverted and I don't talk much around people unless I have a really good relationship with them. It's like people expect to know every detail about you.
@AnnAdeva1
Жыл бұрын
@@Blessed_Daye Preach! I think it is because people feel so entitled to know everyone's business all the time.
@Sylvia_blissful-balance
Жыл бұрын
Just for your information, 95%of ur married friends discuss everything you tell them with their spouses 😩😩
@LuvKitKatt
Жыл бұрын
For why though.. that’s mad weird
@EmefahK
Жыл бұрын
@@LuvKitKatt the sad thing is that it is always the girlfriend’s/wives. Boyfriend’s/Husbands very rarely dish out their friends’ business
@rrrealqueen
Жыл бұрын
Because we married our bestfriends
@SakenaRedmond
Жыл бұрын
Sometimes I def over share as soon as I feel comfortable with someone which I’ve always hated about myself. Lately I’ve been trying to not do that bc ppl rlly don’t need to know all ur business. At my current job everybody knows everyone’s business and shares it with each other without permission & that actually made me realize more and more how I need to keep more to myself just from easily hearing other ppls business
@shayarun2856
Жыл бұрын
you really can’t trust anyone it’s that scary
@kmedabeaute1759
Жыл бұрын
The number 2 point especially is spot on I've never understood why people tell their friends business to their partner? I've never understood it.
@starbright6579
Жыл бұрын
Another one you should keep silent is don't tell people you live with your parents because people hate people who are adults and live with there parents. When I told people I live with my parents they seem to be jealous I think because you save or invest more money, they feel like you got it easy, and that you are not struggling like how they did. Even if you are independent life is hard it's not the way it used to be back in the 1970s-1999. Everything has gone up and savings interest rates have dropped below 0. Gas gone up, rent gone up, food gone up, and life is hard a lot of independent people tell me I wish I lived with my parents. Most parents kick there kids out as soon as they turn 18 so yes if you are an adult and live with your parents other adults will hate you. So I will now stop telling people that I live with my parents or that my mom bought me a car because when I told the man who works at a bank that he gave me a look like oh, I wish my parents did that for me people envy and hate people who live with there parents and I didn't know that until now.
@VicksStyles
Жыл бұрын
I stopped sharing every little thing with anyone , best thing ever 💕💖❤
@madagbehsheriff7472
Жыл бұрын
It is so difficult for me, and keep doing it.
@Lentinalumis
Жыл бұрын
This is so spot on. I’ve been working on improving myself and leveling up. This has been one of the main things I’ve done and I feel so good about keeping a lot private. I’m an influencer and extroverted; and sometimes people expect access into certain areas of your life. Especially the coworker thing. I hardly ever mix colleagues and friendship. Some circles need to be separate for our own good. Be careful of emotional dumping. If you really need to talk, get a therapist if possible. Or have one or two confidantes who have earned your trust and vice versa❤
@mimiwhite-ux6if
Жыл бұрын
Tbh it all depends on the level of friendship and family member, my sister inlaw which is my brother's wife chat about almost anything and everything. it has helped us both in our relationships.
@i-spy-ty
Жыл бұрын
The "your plans with your partner" really resonated with me. I shared with some people what my husband and I were planning on doing in the coming years and they SH*T all over our plans. Telling us both how they were unrealistic etc etc. I was shocked and disheartened! Luckily we are positive people and didn't let the opinion influence us but we made a pact to never share our plans with people again until they have already been completed! It's made us a lot happier with how we view our relationships outside of our marriage! Thank you for this, I know people will benefit from this advice!
@michellebrown572
Жыл бұрын
I needed to hear hear this I shared something with mom my mom yesterday about this guy I'm in a relationship with and it ended up with a lecture. Lesson learned
@CS-bu7lo
Жыл бұрын
If your mom is a good person and genuinely wants the best for you ( some mothers aren't like that, sadly), even though the rant could have been annoying, consider the possibility she might be right as she has more life experience. It was my case 20 years ago. Now that I reached her age then, I understand her better...
@envy2069
Жыл бұрын
I’m naturally not an oversharer. Growing up in a household where family business stays family business, I feel like sometimes my employers and coworkers feel detached from me and are always curious 😭
@envy2069
Жыл бұрын
@@madagbehsheriff7472 I am not the right person to ask! I don’t like sharing super personal details because people can use that against you. I can 100% without a doubt your coworkers may be gossiping about you. I had a coworker that would tell me almost everything about her, down to her constant drug use, exchanging needles with someone in a seedy hotel they live in. Please just be mindful of what you say to people.
@madagbehsheriff7472
Жыл бұрын
@envy2069 this is really getting serious, I don't know what to do until I am depress
@mannycalavera2335
Жыл бұрын
I am on the opposite side of the spectrum. You never had to tell me not to share private things, because I never did. But over time I learned that it can also be a good thing to let some personality show and share some of the things that are important in your life. It makes people understand you a little better, and it helps build relationships (even professional ones). The key is balance. You don't have to be a vault, but you should also recognize what is and is not appropriate to share. And when in doubt: Keep it to yourself.
@rubyboye3785
Жыл бұрын
I can’t get enough of how many times you mention silence in every video of yours ❤
@puritytvlove
Жыл бұрын
Is true, for me I always tell people about my life hoping there will be help , but at the end they turn against me, thank you
@msmiills
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing this video I got older and now realized that being an oversharer actually harmed my relationship as I kept to many “friends” family members up to date on my relationships.🤦🏽♀️ Now I’m wider and only keep my relationship between myself and my partner.
@nanaaraj
Жыл бұрын
That’s a good point. They don’t only force people to share their sex life online but they are also forced share their financial needs on the internet. I notice this happens to artists and celebrities they get asked a lot of personal questions in interviews. I get that it’s to know the human side of them but they don’t have to go into detail. They are well known so they are forced to share everything about themselves even this happens to influencers. They are humans just like every other person, it’s just that their talents gets recognised. They can choose what they want to share publicly. I was watching something on MTV and I saw they played the game where they asked a rapper about other rappers’s big purchases. I knew it was just for entertainment but it’s quite personal to ask them those questions. I was thinking it’s not my business to know what they spend unless I know the person personally and it may not matter to that rapper what they spend. It made me feel uncomfortable to watch it. I’m upcoming artist but when I gradually grow big, I wouldn’t want to share every personal aspect about my life publicly.
@jr38499
Жыл бұрын
She is telling the truth in all areas. I have lived by this advice for years, and it works. Listen to her! "Early stages of everything is delicate."
@celestinarichard7749
Жыл бұрын
I just landed in a hot mess because I can't just stop talking, I'm so hurt😭😭😭 right now, that's why I'm here, to finally learn how to just stop talking.
@lilbeth4804
Жыл бұрын
That second point is so trueeeeee. I hate it so much when people share private things that people tell them. I live in Germany and let me tell you. People don’t automatically know this. They just go ahead and tell everyone what you told them.
@mercynmesoma3902
Жыл бұрын
Silence is golden. I have uncle that live abroad with his family and when i was processing my visa to the same country i didn't tell him nor anyone. I got the visa and told him a week to my traveling. He got so angry that i didn't tell him even before i started processing my visa, almost every of my friend were not happy i didn't tell them. I have lost most of my friends because of this but i don't regret it. I have apologized to people i hurt by leaving without saying good bye however i think being silent about my traveling saved me from a lot.
@sandysan177
2 ай бұрын
Why were they getting offended? How much of their personal life do they share with u? Do they pay yor bills? Forget abt them. Dey r not dat important.
@mercynmesoma3902
2 ай бұрын
@@sandysan177 thank you
@jordanmartin9191
Жыл бұрын
Sharing with my partner is a very important thing for me.I agree with everything that Ur saying apart from that one
@itsalldeliciousness
Жыл бұрын
She didn't say don't share with your partner, she said don't share other people's business that you were told in confidentially with your partner
@Sylvia_blissful-balance
Жыл бұрын
@@itsalldeliciousness my dear that doesn’t work especially for married people. As I married woman I share a lot with my husband. If u have a married friend only tell them what u know u are ok with them telling their husbands because married people talk about everything, especially couples who are very close and are like best friends
@CS-bu7lo
Жыл бұрын
@@Sylvia_blissful-balanceI work in the justice system of my country. The ugliest divorces I have seen were exactly the relationships where they were best friends and shared everything. Their friends resented them when they found out they shared things said in confidence to only one of them. Always prepare yourself for the event your marriage fails, even if it is perfect now , because people change down the line and get bored. Needless to say I don't confide in anyone, I've seen too many betrayals at work...
@gaj30
Жыл бұрын
also something i noticed in my own life is that if i talk about any plans or goals it doesn’t happen anymore. people really send you bad energy and you don’t expect it from certain people but they do. it really is best to keep quiet about everything
@shayarun2856
Жыл бұрын
i have such a problem with oversharing it’s literally why i am so self conscious and have social anxiety. i love talking to people but when they ask me things about my personal life, and not anything else, i’m always getting into difficult, crazy situations for this reason.
@ac7853
Жыл бұрын
I agree for some parts colleagues, sex life, projects etc but if you have people you trust you can share your business without setting up expectations
@phindilemhlongo6224
Жыл бұрын
One thing about me, I’ve learned so much in this 15 Minutes of my day. Thank you sis ✨😊
@nanawordie7967
Жыл бұрын
This video was very informative !! Like you said at the end of the video i’m definitely the type to tell people news because i’m excited about it 😭 i do need to work on waiting until it’s concrete and keeping more things to myself. Thank you for this video !
@nabilarasya
9 ай бұрын
ooh yes!! ive been doing this my whole life, however i was in this phase of life where im kinda tired of 'moving in silence' because nobody seems to celebrate me, and i thought sharing my 'business' would make people celebrate it together w me, and became too open & i kid you not, ive never more regretful my whole life than this ! never doing it again 🙂🙂
@kooliecurlz93
Жыл бұрын
I think it’s important to take videos like this with a pinch of salt. Great points were made but please do not suffer in silence under the guise of not ‘over sharing’. Move with caution.
@shanekiapatterson1509
Жыл бұрын
I've met three very important people through a job. Wouldn't trade them for the world
@ece-hr5fg
Жыл бұрын
thank you for this video! i used to bash myself for being an oversharer and i'm definitely getting better at it, but one thing i noticed from watching this is i NEVER overshare about things that concern other people and i'm proud to be this way. an ex of mine used to constantly tell me intimate things about their friends and it used to make me so uncomfortable. when it ended they accused me of never having trusted them and now i realize it was true, precisely because of this type of oversharing they used to do. conversations and similar things should stay between people; even when there is no explicit agreement between them, parties involved are oftentimes trusting that it will be this way, especially when said conversation concerns intimate topics. i think it is super important to recognize this.
@KGMdh
Жыл бұрын
Not sharing my friend's private lives with partner got to me.
@Nulsqui
Жыл бұрын
Colleges are not our friends that’s true
@bamber4757
Жыл бұрын
Yes to all of this. I find that if Im trying to connect with others, as oppose to oversharing, I’ll ask the other person a question and have them set the tone. That way I understand their comfort level of information to take in. But even then- its best to keep things light. Like sharing your favorite things is the perfect way to do this. They get to know you with out getting too deep. Love this information. 💕
@se2664
Жыл бұрын
I understand the part about when colleagues are not your friends. Yet, some people have met their spouses at work. I'd say in general people should establish boundaries and not share EVERY personal detail with colleagues. it's better to not get too close to them if they work in the SAME department as you. That will cause tension if something goes left. It's okay to establish friendships at work, but DO NOT do it with everyone who seems nice and pay attention to how your company culture is. I understand from the other perspective that some people have lonely lives outside of work and then playing catch up on weekend chores & bills leave them exhausted and not having the energy to go out and make new friends the traditional way. It's easier to establish bonds at nonprofits but NOT corporate (speaking from personal experience). If you work in a corporate for-profit and are a POC forget about even having potential friends. Everyone is obsessed with metrics, money, and only out for themselves. Only 3 coworkers out of 70 employees at my job have my personal cell. I can't be buddy-buddy with everyone.
@Sona77.
Жыл бұрын
It’s really tough making friends outside of work. How do you do it? What’s wrong with making colleagues your friends?
@TiondaRae
Жыл бұрын
Um from my experience nonprofits are just as bad as corporate.
@soilgrasswaterair
Жыл бұрын
I’m friendly with people when I’ve been at workplaces, and some I’ve spent time with outside of work. I have a few rules though: no work talk because when I’m off I’m off, no private details and kept it surface level, no partying and only things during the day or some short evening activity such as listening to some music at a festival and have some food and a soft drink, helping each other out when plants needed watering or pets needed to be fed. There is trust but not where you go overboard. Before when I drank alcohol I had a 2 drinks limit even if I stayed longer at an afterwork (refused to allow work people see me drunk. You can be friendly without turning work into your friend pool. Never had a social issue at work and always left workplaces with good refrences. Been to uni. now for a while for law studies and I plan to keep this mindset up when I head out for more work and I will probably dial the rules up even more due to more being at stake. /Scandinavian
@doreenbenson2197
Жыл бұрын
I can't just get your teachings and opinions enough. Like🤔 ahhh Lucy I love you. I'm practically a victim to most of the things you mentioned here. I've been learning and for today, it will sink. Thank you ❣️
@melissagitts
Жыл бұрын
What isn't concrete should not be shared! 💌
@jennycuteamara9518
Жыл бұрын
Sharing things I told you in confidence with your partner got to be the one that irks me the most. Like why????
@livelaughlove5421
Жыл бұрын
Had this happen to me with my ex best friend. She told her boyfriend. Her boyfriend ended up texting my advice. I appreciated his advice but at end of the day my best friend should not have told him the things I was going through. When my friend broke up with her boyfriend, her boyfriend ended up spilling her business and all her friends business to everybody. INCLUDING MINES😭. When I confronted my ex best friend, she told me it was her fault for telling her. That I should have not told her because people in relationship are suppose to tell each other everything. I learned my lesson to never confide in a woman who is in a relationship.
@patriciaayebare9408
Жыл бұрын
I have been very observant about some of the habits I have found myself doing! Thank you for this video.❤
@mariissa-zf5ty
Жыл бұрын
people hate that i dont do that, my adhd made me do it sometimes and it made me feel so embarrassing... luckely i got diagnosed a year ago so i am so glad i have medication.
@iyescorner862
Жыл бұрын
Everything you said!!! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@user-lk9sl6ri7b
Жыл бұрын
i 100 percent agree on every single thing you said , privacy is one of the biggest things you have to control carefully as a human been because you never know what the word has plan for you
@Princessm1320
Жыл бұрын
This came at the right time for me. Recently my ex accused me telling everyone about our breakup when in reality that’s not true at all. I do overshare sometimes but mainly it’s about stuff in my life like my job or something similar to that. However after things with my ex, I want to heal, be at peace, and live my life without anyone in my business unless I let them in!
@CS-bu7lo
Жыл бұрын
Nah, he's just looking for a pretext to argue with you. Some of my ex-es did that and later even confessed they were looking to argue with me. And even if you did share about your ex, it is your business, not his anymore.
@tolanimary
Жыл бұрын
10:03 I've done that before and I felt so relieved after recording myself in my emotions. I felt less burdened
@nakyonicatherine500
Жыл бұрын
Thanks sister I believe I gave lost and suffered shame alot after doing these things thinking all are with me but only shame after
@akamavimba1379
Жыл бұрын
Very much older than you!! But I learn alot From you my darling! God bless you 🙏
@bamideletaiwo5085
Жыл бұрын
Keep your personal life to yourself, it is your own business.
@madagbehsheriff7472
Жыл бұрын
I don't know how to do it, would you help me please
@bamideletaiwo5085
Жыл бұрын
Here a tip you can use, any personal affair involving you you can keep your mouth shut to others. I hope that is helpful.
@NotThatDeep
Жыл бұрын
This trend of not sharing what’s going on in your life/what you’re going through good and bad is a part of the loneliness epidemic issue. Don’t get me wrong, I fully understand why the trend is a trend, some have taken sharing their business too far or with the wrong ppl, but we all need people who know what’s going on, who knows us-so we can connect on a deeper level. Loneliness is killing us.
@candynell8779
Жыл бұрын
Over sharing does not equate with happiness. Loneliness comes from one’s actions.
@lasantuzza777
Жыл бұрын
i think the message is not “don’t share with anyone” but “don’t share with *everyone* ”. especially in the age of social media where every inch of our body mind and soul is shared it’s all very.. tacky/immature.. even dangerous. privacy is protection. it’s great to share ourselves with people we’ve vetted and can trust.
@AFJBeauty
Жыл бұрын
There is not such thing as a “lioness issue”. Black women are waking up from this ratchet mentality that has been pushed on us for decades and I see that some BW are very bothered by this. They do not want to see other BW embrace their classiness and femininity that comes natural to us. This video is not telling women to never share anything with anyone. Every thing she said in this vid is on point. So many women share way too much about their lives online and it’s very embarrassing. She is just telling women to only share personal details with very close people in your lives. The workplace is honestly the last place to be looking for friends, and you should not tell those people your business. I agree with telling someone that you know if you’re dating someone because if something happens to you, they can give a lead to the police but other than that nobody needs to know your business. The lioness phenomenon is one of the greatest things to happen to BW in a while. I think the hyena epidemic is the real problem.
@februarykhahloe2600
Жыл бұрын
The second one is definitely a gem for me. I was quite ignorant about about it. But I am glad that I've learned now👩🎓
@Ebuskitchens
Жыл бұрын
Good evening Lucy happy Sunday and happy palm Sunday 🌴🌴🌴🌴🌴 . The video was amazing 😍😍😍😍 thank you so much
@iveel4226
Жыл бұрын
Oh my god... Literally you made me think of me from few years ago who was so miserable... I was dealing with a lot of things and didn't know what to do about them so I figured it's gonna be quite normal if I'll talk about it to my friend. Apparently everything I've ever told her, literally every little detail about my intimacy, family problems, ANYTHING she was telling right after to her boyfriend.when I tried to confront her about it she was like "well him and I are like one body so it's natural he must know everything too" BRUH
@MindSetOnWealth
Жыл бұрын
For the most part, I have always been a private person but have learned to open up a bit, but not overshare about my life.
@vickymg_
Жыл бұрын
Lucy is just very intelligent ❤❤
@erinpoole6962
Жыл бұрын
Why can’t I find women who think just like you where I am. It’s like we are rare ppl
@lloydfrancis9149
Жыл бұрын
As a Londoner I'm learning this.
@ebierebere
Жыл бұрын
Thank so much for this power of silence videos Lucy🙏🏾 ❤️I’ve learnt a lot of things from you that I’ve started implementing in my life and more from this video which I am guilty of that’ll still have to stop over sharing in my life especially things at the early stage.
@Tatianarain
Жыл бұрын
Yo that second point is so true. A a coincidence that a few minutes before watching this video, I was thinking about how married friends or relatives have used my gist /private conversation for “bonding time” conversation with their husbands. A number of them have weird boring pathetic lives and marriages and need other peoples gist to keep their conversations interesting so their partner won’t lose interest and realize just how boring they really are I had to hide my ig stories from a friend and her husband because like clockwork, it felt so awkward how they would pop us as first to view my stories. I also remember how I divulged my partying anecdotes to my aunt/cousin and the next day she goes “by the way I told my husband that gist you told me yesterday o. I don’t keep secrets from him. Hope you don’t mind “ I felt kinda irritated. First of all this wasn’t even her “secret” to tell. It was mine? And I was staying with them for a bit and her husband seems the prude uptight type. I didn’t want him asking me to leave out of him fearing that I was corrupting his wife or kids. That couple was weird in general and my aunt/cousin has very insecure and “pick me” vibes. She’s the type that would talk bad about another woman to her husband to deter him from her. She’s not a girl’s girl if u get my drift. And she has all boys and would chat about how she is sooo happy she has no daughters. I can see her competing with her daughter if she ever did. Just an obnoxious woman
@Anonymous-gt1eq
Жыл бұрын
All what she is saying is spot on correct!!
@TruePathLiving
Жыл бұрын
Also, also, people don't get disappointed if you tell them you were planning to get married and don't, they actually get happy. People love to see others miserable. Sadly.
@ninaschafers200
2 ай бұрын
Awesome explained❤ GOD BLESS YOU🙏🏼
@kayitii
Жыл бұрын
So true. We all tend to overshare and that’s ok. But doing these things really helps build your self confidence & decision-making skills
@nanden4641
Жыл бұрын
“Of what use is that?” THAT is the motto 😂🔥
@elianna67
Жыл бұрын
Great advice, I have been doing this for years and it works. You hold all the power and they can’t manipulate you. Thank you. Love your channel ❤
@Blessed-me6tf
Жыл бұрын
You are so pretty!
@margeyb.8665
Жыл бұрын
I learnt not sharing stuff the hard way. Human beings are weird 😅 Still learning everyday. Great stuff 🫶🏾
@Momentswithjojo
Жыл бұрын
Silence is golden but Life is not this deep 😂. Set boundaries but don’t be too calculated. Life is to be lived . Again set boundaries.
@Nat-mw3bz
Жыл бұрын
Calculating how to move in this life, in this skin is NECESSARY!
@debbieadeoye
Жыл бұрын
15 mins well spent. Spot on!
@loveinchrist6115
11 ай бұрын
Amen, i never sharey plans wuth no one not online wnd i dint egen soesk. And home too cause my home is monitored snd stalked
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