Because of their hypergamous tendencies, women generally mate and date for gain -- and they typically have no qualms about passing over men who are not in a position to provide benefit. However, in every culture on the planet, it is the servant who takes the money. The servant is the one who is paid. One of the most over-looked consequences of hypergamy is the creation of a relational indebtedness that was historically discharged in domestic service. This does not interest most modern women; however, they are also not interested in disabusing themselves of their hypergamous tendencies. As might be expected, this creates problems in the economy of the sexual marketplace. Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Social Media Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: kzitem.info/news/bejne/uKiOqK6Ha3p1eIY Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: kzitem.info/rock/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #dating #relationship
@ForceAlfaF1
8 ай бұрын
@@Alexxx492 Any man capable of thinking coherently on a topic for more than about 30 seconds is acutely aware of this point. It's a good one, but it is obvious and should not be taken too far. If children are the ultimate gift a woman can give a man, what purpose does a woman have once her children can walk, talk, and get jobs? Since her childbearing years are when she's quite young, this leaves a good 20-25 years of her life after with no purpose to men or any given man. The answer to this at one time was: She provides *some* upfront value to the man before and during the birth and rearing of children ("bringing something to the table") as a down payment (of sorts) on long term security after she cannot have more children. You will find that the problem many modern men currently have with modern women is women's problem with this concept of bringing something to the table that men want other than their bodies. And you can't have it both ways. "We women can be ruthlessly hypergamous because we make babies, this is right, natural, and good. However, Men's biological drive to impregnant as many women as possible is rude, low-brow, and feral and it must be overcome for everyone's good -- but all we will offer is sex. Forget loyalty, cooperation or obedience!" How does that work? The former has just as many long-term poisonous effects to Human society as the latter would have over the short term. I would even argue that the effects of the former are even MORE insidious because they are so much less obvious and so much harder to reverse in any sort of natural way, -- and we're watching them play out as this video accrues views because of this. Peace out. Not trying to argue. I respectfully offer it that the point just seems as if it should be finer.
@YaGudBuddyUncleNate
8 ай бұрын
@@Alexxx492 The ultimate gift a woman can give is unmitigated loyalty in servitude to her mate. Only after a woman pledges absolutely fealty with the certainty of paternity can children be "the ultimate gift" to a man We're not in an agrarian society where children are necessarily a net benefit anymore, albeit still a worthwhile investment perhaps... But as the saying goes "Mama's baby, Papa's maybe" can be all too accurate these days. IF the children are actually his own, they are more so building blocks on an already solid foundation.
@cosmictreason2242
8 ай бұрын
You can also be paid without being in a master slave relationship, if you are self employed. Undoubtedly this is how many women prefer to see it these days. But the self employed person Does not have a permanent relationship with the client. It is subject to end at any time and is essentially mutually exploitative. Marriage is not prostitution because in marriage sex is obligatory regardless of resources and resources are obligatory regardless of sex. They are not a transaction in a healthy traditional marriage. Don't marry someone who thinks sex is a reward for behavior. Its a reward for marrying
@cosmictreason2242
8 ай бұрын
@@ForceAlfaF1you and the first guy are wrong bexshde you're operating from a falsr premise. Marriage is not fundamentally for babies, it is for the Gospel. Read Ephesians 5 all the way. Your relationship precedes and postcedes any children
@salivadriven
8 ай бұрын
@@cosmictreason2242 Sex is a mutually extension of people’s need for intimacy, which strengthens a couples love, bond and unity. Don’t assume that a man can expect sex by virtue of marriage. And don’t assume that men always want more sex than women.
@ruminantmelanoid5444
8 ай бұрын
That was the most clinical and sophisticated way of saying women want to have their cake and eat it too that I have ever heard.🙂
@gregorylatta8159
8 ай бұрын
Exactly 💯
@loganblackwood2922
8 ай бұрын
And your cake and to eat it too.
@hyperteleXii
8 ай бұрын
Is that why most of them are overweight? From eating all the cake?
@ruminantmelanoid5444
8 ай бұрын
@@hyperteleXii 🤣🤣🤣
@kengaroo5170
8 ай бұрын
Love seems to be non-existent in romance. It's transactional. If men want love get a dog and never sigh a business contract with a woman. She's just your turn. Once they get the upper hand, they see you as below them and leave to upgrade again.
@mynametrong5508
8 ай бұрын
This is why it's so important for men to stop being simps. Like please have some self respect and don't lower your value just to please women.
@kristoffmyers9862
8 ай бұрын
Exactly 💯
@stevegaines-vq3bd
8 ай бұрын
well said....don't give them cash & respect if it's not earned...
@cinnababe53
8 ай бұрын
@@stevegaines-vq3bd we have our own bag .. we work and have children too... we are hellva multitaskers... if it doesn't work with you we work around you
@coimbralaw
3 ай бұрын
I don’t disagree in principle, but I’m not sure that that’s really possible. It is something so deeply ingrained in us from millions of years of evolution, the momentum is not really something that can be stopped.
@vladivf
Ай бұрын
Which is impossible for most men. When an attractive woman pays some attention to them, they lose all control.
@rossdavis428
8 ай бұрын
I do not mind women wanting hypergamy, but I do mind women wanting hypergamy *without working* for it~
@Brymerius
8 ай бұрын
This. 💯
@whenpigsfly8178
8 ай бұрын
Yeah, I'd rather trade with a woman than become her disposable slave.
@Pride0FTh3Lion
8 ай бұрын
This why I’ve come to the conclusion that most if not all women suck at hypergamy. If they didn’t, they would understand & accept what you said & “settling” wouldn’t be such a common term. Most men don’t care if women practice hypergamy but if they are to be successful at it, you have to EARN that man & the privileges that come with being with him.
@kingmelanin7468
8 ай бұрын
They went from -being great cooks, to moderate cooks, protesting cooks, to cant cook-AT ALL. -No debt, a little debt, to completely insolvent -Virgins, promiscuos, to 100+ bodies -from no children out of wedlock, then maybe had 1, and now have 3+ looking for a husband
@Pride0FTh3Lion
8 ай бұрын
@@kingmelanin7468 Can’t forget the weight issue. Went from skinny to slim to curvy to a few extra pounds to obese
@phipsdeus2
8 ай бұрын
Unfortunately, in too many marriages, the man is paying for sex he’s not getting.
@thedualtransition6070
8 ай бұрын
Increasing comfort does not a woman's sex drive alight!
@artzarr5032
2 ай бұрын
Marriage = You've been punked.
@PitbullofWallStreet
8 ай бұрын
The juice isn’t worth the squeeze is perhaps the best description of modern relationships.
@Ezberron
8 ай бұрын
The simple fact that asking the question "what do you bring to the table beyond your kitty?" causes all sort of sputtering and pearl-clutching means they've been used to being spoiled for so long they don't think they need to do anything else. if it's just for the kitty, then "the money is on the dresser. now get out."
@stevegaines-vq3bd
8 ай бұрын
@@Ezberron i agree....today's females want too much & give too little, if anything at all..& they still complain....there's not enough good men to take advantage of.....
@roadscholarwarrior
8 ай бұрын
This is so well said. I wish I would have heard this about 15 years ago. Would have saved me a lot of money 😂
@thelammas8283
8 ай бұрын
😂😂😂 Me too brother
@EE12CSVT
8 ай бұрын
'Women' s status decreases and a man's status increases as a function of time' Except women don't think that way. For one thing, they believe their SMV remains fixed through life at its highest point of 23 years old, and middle aged single mothers in low paid part time jobs think they're higher status than a childless man in a respectable career of the same age or older. The deulu is off the scale.
@22448824
8 ай бұрын
You’re not wrong there. Women don’t really believe that their SMV goes down with time. They actually think that earning more money increases it!!
@ogbg7128
8 ай бұрын
Women don’t always think logically in the dynamic of a relationship, they are usually pure emotion. You have to operate from your masculine core in the dynamic so she submits and knows you’re in control and she can feel safe with your leadership.
@thedalillama
8 ай бұрын
I went out with one such woman yesterday. She is totally delusional.
@EE12CSVT
8 ай бұрын
@@ogbg7128 Yes, I know. That's what women did around me. It doesn't happen any more. Of all the marriages and LTRs of people I know well, I can only think of two where the woman has submitted to her man. In all the others, it's the other way round, and that's the norm here in the UK - it's the woman who's in control in the relationship. It's been like that for generations.
@VBoo459
8 ай бұрын
Because it’s actually the money and life that matters. Women don’t actually care how men perceive e their SMV. Eventually amens go down as well. Eventually we all die. No one educated actually cared about this nonsense.
@leadbusinessanalyst4920
8 ай бұрын
As a 40+ yo educated man living in US, your content is 100% spot-on for the majority of male to female relationships that I have experienced. Cheers!
@22448824
8 ай бұрын
Are there lots of uneducated people in America?
@dwdwone
8 ай бұрын
I think it's cheaper to rent than to buy. This changes the way i view the transaction.
@TravelingFoodBunny
8 ай бұрын
Rent seems to work well when the persons are young and healthy. How about when they are old and frail and no kids..let alone if no money too…like at their death bed. What would be a good solution?
@rob21
8 ай бұрын
This is why after my first marriage ended, I only date now.
@liamo8932
8 ай бұрын
@TravelingFoodBunny consciously save the vast amount of money from 'buying" along with associated service charge over the years for care provision later in life? Spent the time saved on nurturing friendships to provide some of the above along with company. There are no guarantees under the buying approach that the person will be there in later life. Approaching 50% chance they won't in English speaking western countries.
@kensebben1
8 ай бұрын
@@TravelingFoodBunny lol, no no no. We are picking our struggle out here. Being broke ain't one of them. For the last 10 years, mens spaces have be saying get and keep your money right.
@TravelingFoodBunny
8 ай бұрын
@@liamo8932 seems like a good strategy. There’s no guarantee that women in non-native English speaking countries will be that much different either 🤣
@prajietsidhu7289
8 ай бұрын
Very neatly explained. It is an issue of double standards. Please put out more videos on modern relationship problems and how to deal with them.
@22448824
8 ай бұрын
Your joking right? Literally ALL of his videos are about that. About Hypergamy
@jasonBGI
8 ай бұрын
How to deal with them? DON'T deal with them. "Them" = modern minded western women.
@_Solaris
8 ай бұрын
Almost _all_ the vids he does are related to this.
@aalvarez305
8 ай бұрын
This man deserves protection at all costs.
@PeteFish-b1f
8 ай бұрын
no he doesnt hes no good , just like all of us
@MatiKosa
8 ай бұрын
@@PeteFish-b1fYes he is. He is very inteligent, knowledgable and has the emotional awareness, unlike posers like Tate. You get all of the valuable concepts explained in a simple way, with real life examples and metaphors.
@darnitamar
8 ай бұрын
I wish men and women would listen to him instead of these useless batching each sex podcast. Sadia the psychology and him are really good for both sexes@@MatiKosa
@OldMoneyLover
8 ай бұрын
@@PeteFish-b1fdon’t drag him down into your level , it’s an insult to him, no good you
@epyonrsi8829
8 ай бұрын
This man is a charlatan.
@immortaljanus
8 ай бұрын
Fucking Hell. I never swear but this one takes the cake. Well done, Orion.
@Carlbooze
8 ай бұрын
You're a star; not many people can explain such topics in such a captivating manner as you have been able to do!
@ja60123
8 ай бұрын
My divorce cost everything I had earned up until that point in life. Happened after a catastrophic auto accident, I was left with no assets, homeless while I was relearning to walk
@juansolis8891
8 ай бұрын
hope everything is better now
@balrajrai8071
8 ай бұрын
Man, life can be heartless, don't let it be the end.
@omgbbq2
8 ай бұрын
Sorry to hear, but wouldn't you be left with half the assets if you both divorced?
@carlosortegaart
15 күн бұрын
Im sorry for what you lived trough
@fluentinoverthinking
8 ай бұрын
I’d rather be happy being a servant and getting paid by the man I love wholeheartedly than doing the same for a random man (my boss) by performing meaningless tasks like 95% of the jobs imply. There is no guarantee your marriage will be happy and long-lasting but at least there is hope.
@Lbf5677
8 ай бұрын
Yes, when you retire your boss also leaves the picture 😜
@ivananderson141
8 ай бұрын
Yep than the next day change your mind
@nina.cazimi
8 ай бұрын
Unwanted sex occurs far more within a marriage than in a brothel. Who wants to be tied to that? We know that hearts can change, most of the times change.
@eunanavesani6074
8 ай бұрын
@@nina.cazimi who wants to hav sex with a partner that gained 10kg over christmass
@shaymalchione809
8 ай бұрын
Meaningless tasks? Speak for yourself some of us have meaningful jobs.
@ligafftheindifferent3495
8 ай бұрын
Allowing the argument that hypergamy is a natural instinct and therefore to be accepted is precisely equivalent to failing to hold women accountable for their actions. We all have base instincts and desires. The difference is that society demands men to control or even repress these, but women are largely given a free pass, if not outright encouraged to follow their base instincts and desires.
@AfriqueNY
8 ай бұрын
Wow. This is spot on. This should be pinned.
@michellesmith7363
Ай бұрын
As a woman I agree. I don’t believe in it, if I make a commitment I’m staying with that man and building a life together. There’s always someone better out there. Cherish what you have and pull together as a team.
@animamagna3077
8 ай бұрын
Well put: an equal trade in 30 will not remain an equal trade in 50. As a 50something man, I date increasingly younger women since my early 30s. The reason why I don't buy so called "equal relationships" with women of my age is a simple one. No matter how mature and successful a woman is you still has to pay. And I choose rather to pay for something tangible, namely for youth and beauty. As strange as it may sound, the paycheck a 20something attractive woman expects to get from you is often lower than requirements of a mature and successful woman of the same level of physical attractiveness.
@thedualtransition6070
8 ай бұрын
Worse than that their "standards" and annoying habits increase while their sex drive goes the opposite way! I am now 60 something and still date women in their 30s and sometimes 20s (I have kept in good health and shape). A "mature woman of the same level of physical attractiveness", they don't exist. Come on, a good looking 20/30 something will always beat some woman in her 40s/50s. In long marriages a woman generally gives her beauty and commitment when she is young so that the man (who does value relationship equity) will remain with her when he has much better options later in life. That's the reality that all these women who divorce in their 40s are finding out.
@johnfisher7143
8 ай бұрын
It’s a fact. Women don’t share their resources with men. Even when you were sharing your resources, when she overtakes you in salary she’s keeping that for herself, not sharing it with you.
@Nordic_Sky
8 ай бұрын
Exactly this. As a woman ages and becomes less desirable, her demands and costs ESCALATE. They do not go down.
@jonny1943
3 ай бұрын
Boom! Mic drop!
@stevepoythress4678
8 ай бұрын
Love this episode - thanks Dr Taraban, that closing thought about the balance of value changing over time and it's impact on the relationship is huge
@dwightbrown
8 ай бұрын
It's tough to stay on a path that works for both for 30-40 years.
@moenibus
8 ай бұрын
Women like money and profit. The water is wet. More news at eleven.
@Diatom1k
8 ай бұрын
😂
@danielfcastro
5 ай бұрын
I don't think that's always the case, the water at below 32°F is not wet.
@Chisscaso
8 ай бұрын
Doc, I cannot overstate how much I appreciate the new analogies. These are gold. We do not take them for granted.
@pranshujagtap
8 ай бұрын
Expecting women would understand this is naivety.
@GreatRetro
8 ай бұрын
they will understand loneliness! Men just need to be disciplined and NOT agree to anything unfair!
@juniorcorrado7868
8 ай бұрын
@@GreatRetro But they will allways get sex!
@masterTigress96
8 ай бұрын
@@GreatRetro 💯 Gentleman, vote with your love, time, attention, validation, and your d*ck! Not all women are deserving of your gratitude and grace.
@tess7798
8 ай бұрын
What are you talking about? I’m a woman and I understand it fully and easily.
@tigerbear3038
8 ай бұрын
@@GreatRetro Yes, my disappointment in my dating life stems from my expectation that women play fairly.
@doodlebob4143
8 ай бұрын
As a man who makes over 100k, i only date non career women. The problem is that even if a woman makes 40k, she still believes she's entitled to half of everything while only contributing a fraction of the combined income. I'd prefer a woman who can hold down the house and support me in other ways. Women who make 100k+? Wouldn't even consider it beyond a hookup. Couldn't imagine the attitude that comes with it.
@joannamonique707
7 ай бұрын
Most men have exactly the same attitude when they're breadwinners. Society has just told them it's okay for them to be controlling arrogant assholes and so it is completely overlooked. But mens ego and arrogance is a huge reason so many of them are single. Women are beyond tired of their arrogance.
@bxmully
8 ай бұрын
Thank you Dr. Orion! I've sent your videos to my sister in law in the past. I hope she uses them fruitfullly bc they are on point.
@canelareina3795
8 ай бұрын
What kind of fruit do you hope for?
@healthymindhappierlife5089
8 ай бұрын
@@canelareina3795 Poisoned apple 😆
@22448824
8 ай бұрын
She make excuses to herself then resent you. I speak from experience
@bxmully
8 ай бұрын
@22448824 she's still in college and very receptive to this stuff. She will do well. She's leagues ahead of her friends in this kind of stuff. But I get what you mean tbh
@DragonNo1
8 ай бұрын
Brilliant analysis! My guess is that you receive lots hate messages from modern women unable to solve this riddle in their mind and seeing their SMV going down everyday.
@georgeelder8415
8 ай бұрын
A solution you alluded to, Dr. Taraban, was for the ladies to, "find your dark horse." Something my mother used to say was quite similar, "find someone to, "join forces with."
@eunanavesani6074
8 ай бұрын
Not the issue here. Men nowadays dont want to join forces whit entitled princess.
No, he said that as couples age the man's value increases, so even if things start equally they won't end equally
@eunanavesani6074
8 ай бұрын
@@Alexxx492 they dont start equally. A womans value is sky hight at 16, 17, 18, 20.
@georgeelder8415
8 ай бұрын
@@Alexxx492 Correct. The woman's loyalty, nurturing, and investment over the years is supposed to become,"wife goggles." The fact that she's aged isn't seen by the husband, due to him having her from her youth until old age...
@nflscarlzyy
8 ай бұрын
I've been watching vlogs of a matchmaker in China about Chinese women's absurdly high requirements for their ideal partner while they themselves have very little to offer in a relationship. I'd say your theories work worldwide.
@Nordic_Sky
8 ай бұрын
Sure, because of female infanticide, there are not enough women to go around. So, their egos explode, and they want the moon & the stars. No surprise there. It's the same on online dating sites where 4s think they are 9s. A complete joke.
@slartibartfast2452
8 ай бұрын
If shes selected for fem in ism, shes opted out of any sort of successful relationship. That is the debt she aquires.
@monsurmia971
8 ай бұрын
Dr T this was absolute gold. You're always hitting it hard but the girls won't heed. They will continue to need!
@caseyparks3954
8 ай бұрын
This was the clearest and best video you’ve ever made.
@dangersmymiddlename6341
8 ай бұрын
Dude, you give considerable energy to creating these episodes
@NotMe-et9bx
8 ай бұрын
As always, you hit the bullseye. The succinctly combined several past videos, so I think I will actually play this for folks next time I get in a convo about hypergamy.
@silentcal275
8 ай бұрын
"I don't know what else to call it but modern prostitution. Now before I go any firther If you're liking what you're hearing please consider sending this episode to someone who might benefit from its message" 😂😂😂
@NyakzOTSD
8 ай бұрын
😭😭😭😭😭😭😂😂😂😂😂😂
@WendyOryen
8 ай бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉😂🎉
@Dewane1511
8 ай бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😭😭
@ricardocastro3118
8 ай бұрын
“Women treat men the way men treat jobs”. This should be a T-shirt.
@nemesis5481
7 ай бұрын
_I just subscribed to your channel as a direct result of one the interviews you did with Soft White Underbelly. You are clearly vastly knowledgeable in the topic of intersexual dynamics and your name is as cool as a name gets._
@brettwheeler7753
Ай бұрын
Back in the 1990s I was in the Army and also worked a Part time bartending job off of the Post on the weekends when I could. Fridays my day started at 5:00 AM and ended Saturday morning at 2:00 AM. When I arrived home from the bar, I would put my $100 or whatever on the dresser for my wife to buy household supplies, gas, baby clothes, etc. However, she complained that I wasn't getting up at 7:00 AM Saturday to help with the house work. I finally have her an ultimatum: you can keep receiving the money and let me sleep in, or I'll hire someone to come in and clean the house, and give her the money, and I'll sleep in. She took the money.
@jeewssam8418
8 ай бұрын
I love this channel is tears down the under lying concepts in relationships
@WelcomeToTheMadness
8 ай бұрын
This is such a simple presentation that oddly, will create an issue if you present it to the other side.
@runnerelken9751
8 ай бұрын
Nope, totally fine.
@stagebloq6002
8 ай бұрын
@@runnerelken9751the women listening to him are special cases. It’s better a professional like him says or a woman says it. This is the relationship exchange women have created today. It’s probably because you don’t notice.
@professoribrahimbello-kano5364
8 ай бұрын
This video is powerfully logical. It's also a rational exploration of women's nature.
@ggstylz
8 ай бұрын
Everything works out as intended. It just takes a long time with a lot of suffering. Minimising this as best one can is the goal.
@jimhendricks88
8 ай бұрын
This was brilliant and articulate. Thanks for a great presentation!
@dionpeek4339
8 ай бұрын
I came to the same conclusion and it’s nice to hear my suspicions confirmed thank you very much young man keep up the good work
@JAdams-jx5ek
8 ай бұрын
Clear, concise, and well stated. Thank you.
@themasculinismmovement
8 ай бұрын
You are doing very good work at explaining these things in such definitive sociological and economic terms. You speak with great aplomb and are doing more than justice to these topics, much more than anyone else is. Thank you for your valuable contribution to the manosphere.
@sammyb1651
8 ай бұрын
You misunderstand. They've raised their value. They're ALL 10's now. So they discharged any "debt" owed simply by deigning to be in a relationship with your average billionaire. *Wedges tongue firmly in cheek* I wish I was joking btw.
@jcorey333
6 ай бұрын
This is the most interesting explanation I've ever heard for current intersexual dynamics.
@ffstretch
8 ай бұрын
Richard Cooper gave you a shout out today. You both are great
@mikemurrill01
8 ай бұрын
Clearly articulated. Tough facts for all
@varmastiko2908
8 ай бұрын
This is perfect logic when referring to sovereign human beings. However, if you introduce an owner/slave dynamic into the picture things change. The slave is obligated to serve the owner with no compensation. If the slave makes money that money also goes to the owner. This is the world we live in today.
@drinkxyz
8 ай бұрын
You're saying the slave is the man in modern marriages and sex is the whip? Interesting
@drinkxyz
8 ай бұрын
Sex is the bait and family court is the whip
@varmastiko2908
8 ай бұрын
@@drinkxyzSex is the bait. Servitude is the goal. Government is the whip. Woman gets the benefits of the master. But she relies on HER master to enforce her status.
@r1p2m32
8 ай бұрын
Strong, insightful talk. Hats off. Matches eternal experience. And... Women are still worth the price. Just compute it!
@r1p2m32
8 ай бұрын
As a fresh-ish widower, after almost 30 years, I did compute, years, years ago. End result: Sweetening memories, by day.
@scottyguy401
8 ай бұрын
A woman making her own money is a servant to her job/boss.
@terry9238
8 ай бұрын
Would you rather be a “servant” to a “boss” for 8 or 10 hours a day, then come home to a PARTNER-or be a “servant” who lives with your “boss” 24/7? Probably the first one, right? So why would you expect women to choose any differently than you do?
@scottyguy401
8 ай бұрын
@terry9238 Most women would rather serve the man they are in love with, rather than a boss at a 9-5 job that they have no personal intimate relationship with. If a woman prefers to serve her boss at a job more than her man, then she's not truly in love with that man.
@godishere4
8 ай бұрын
I always like every episode. You have such a wise approach to these controversial issues
@darrenlinscott4282
8 ай бұрын
Another brilliant video!
@kyleflournoy7730
8 ай бұрын
I think a dynamic that should have been explored in this video as well is what happens when a woman is so committed to being the boss that she is willing to cut a check and have a man be in service to her. What that looks like and what potential problems can arise from that.
@barnettmcgowan8978
8 ай бұрын
If both the woman and the man could truly be satisfied in such an arrangement, I would be in favor of it. I do have serious questions as to whether most women and most men could be satisfied in such a relationship.
@Ezberron
8 ай бұрын
isn't that just a sugar momma? She pays her boytoy to keep her bed warm. and he does it because he's got nothing better going...yet.
@AfriqueNY
8 ай бұрын
It's called being catfished. Or Pookie. Or gigolo. Been around forever. Usually happens when women age out
@barrykochverts4149
8 ай бұрын
Jordan Peterson describes the type. She does not want a strong man, but one whom she can master, use for reproduction, then remove. Not a recipe for a long term relationship.
@JoseDiaz-rd9fh
8 ай бұрын
@@barnettmcgowan8978 it rarely works out women often lose respect for men in this situation. It would be an ideal trend to equalize family court system, child support judgements, alimony etc.. once women start to suffer for laws and policies intended to fleece men they will only be to eager to be more reasonable
@yeisonportillo22
8 ай бұрын
Damn! This is exacly what I faced in my last relationship, I didn´t see any "service" coming in the foreseable future but I had to start flowing resources right away. Long story short... I moved on from her, I´m single and feeling precisely what Orion explained, the same orange isn´t worth the squeeze if by the same value I can squeeze multiple ones once in a while and focus on my life. Thanks Orion!
@6teeth318
8 ай бұрын
I very much like that your video is in one take. Most edit the crap out and it shows. and the tonation, pauses, commas, just gets lost. Thumbs up for unedited video.
@tigerbear3038
8 ай бұрын
This video proves once again that the problems with modern dating is mostly caused by women. There's a biological component to hypergamy that might be hard for women to override but at the same time there are all kinds of biological behaviours that women overwrote. For instance, if throughout history, women mostly acted as the servant and developed an instinct for it, they have miraculously over the past few decades abandoned that despite their biological penchant to do so. Hypergamy can no longer be blamed on biology as the reason why women cling to it. Women cling to it simply because it benefits them. At same time, there are trade-offs with every decision and they do not see the downside to it.
@doru4248
8 ай бұрын
No, the fault is always shared equally. Men and women are complementary and you can't have a serious imbalance if the fault is not shared equally. Women traumatize their male children into submission, men accept government abuse against themselves. This is the vicious cycle in which we find ourselves.
@jeffjohnson5053
8 ай бұрын
It is very obvious that in western countries the women are very entitled and expects to be the boss and REFUSES to be the servant and she STILL wants to collect the pay checks. The younger men don't see this, and we need to inform them of the DANGERS of being with western women!! ....We need to inform the younger generation of men, that FOREIGN women are 100 times better than western women. Any of you men who has traveled to foreign countries will tell you right away, that foreign women are totally feminine, humble and family oriented!! But, back to western women. The problem that I see, is that, western men won't put western women in their place. Either, western men has evolved to being weaker, or afraid of laws, or afraid of being called abusive and controlling. Western men are not doing their jobs in putting women in their place. I do see many foreign men placing their women in place, but western men are really lacking in this area. As a result, western women are out of control!!
@_Solaris
8 ай бұрын
Good thought.
@JoseDiaz-rd9fh
8 ай бұрын
The root of all societal decay is simping it needs to be criminalized. Either that or restrict womens sexuality again but neither will happen we are f****😂😂😂. Women overode their biological impulse to serve men we need to override our impulse to provide for them. No amount of activism will matter until enough men shock the system enough for them to care
@ZhulMechanos
8 ай бұрын
Men gave them this power. As with everything else it’s men’s fault 😂
@dar1948
8 ай бұрын
One of the best channels on YT
@paulhealy1
8 ай бұрын
Very well argued. A missing component though is divorce. When the relationship is no longer worth the salary, a women can walk with half the value. It might even be logical to do so.
@andersnielsen6044
8 ай бұрын
Why wouldn't she if she have provided 50% of all common wealth?
@Dewane1511
8 ай бұрын
@@andersnielsen6044most women don’t provide 50% of the wealth my aunt is a lawyer for 20+ years don’t do this ….lol
@dharmadasa66
8 ай бұрын
@@andersnielsen6044 But has she? And do the courts really adjudicate it fairly? Many people think not.
@andersnielsen6044
8 ай бұрын
@@dharmadasa66 50% in = 50% out, it really is that simple.
@dharmadasa66
8 ай бұрын
@@andersnielsen6044 May be in Sweden and Nordic countries, not everywhere.
@yeziagabi7964
4 ай бұрын
It’s crazy you talked about Morden dating being a form of prostitution because I have always thought that even though people around me don’t see it that way. It even goes a step further because the man gives time and resources just for her to only offer sex and “her time” I personally don’t even date any woman with such mindset but I see it in the community at large. Thank you for the affirmation on that. 4:42
@imad4857
8 ай бұрын
I am rich enough to be responsible for everything women desire, and not expecting anything in return. The problem occurs when they don’t treat me the same way. ❤
@zhowyalikemenow
8 ай бұрын
Just an observation. You do a great job and provide interesting content. That said, most all of us are well aware that you must prepare your talks ahead of time and read them back during your videos. You do a reasonable job of maintaining eye contact, albeit with continual intermittent changes of your gaze down and slightly to the right or left. IMHO, would be much better if you could employ a better prompter that allows you to look through it and create the illusion that you always speaking and looking directly to all of us. Check out the podcast videos of Andrew Huberman, they’re extremely detailed and long form but he never breaks eye contact. I’ve seen some other You tubers that have reviewed these devices and I think it would really improve your viewers overall experience and become seemless. All the best to you! Great work! Jim
@habibaezzat2055
8 ай бұрын
I think most women understand this at least at a subconscious level, the issue is feeling that you're putting all your eggs in one basket and given the increasing rate of divorce, the need to work/ earn money doesn't stem necessarily from wanting to be the boss but from a safety net perspective like what if after years of marriage and "being the servant" willingly you're left alone with no work skills and you're too old/"past your prime" to be considered attractive? It's such a personal dilemma for me as im realising that I actually like to serve someone I love and if that comes with a sens of financial/material stability then all the better,but the problem is always what if this person decides for whatever reason to give up on that "contract" and you're left with virtually nothing, its very hard to actually love someone when you're there out of fear/ necessity.
@eunanavesani6074
8 ай бұрын
Most divorces are initiaded by wemen.
@Eye_of_Horus
8 ай бұрын
It’s overwhelmingly women who file for divorce though. For the most part you don’t have to worry about men divorcing you unless you do something terrible. The two top reasons for men to file divorce are 1. She’s going to prison. 2. She became a drug addict.
@watamutha
8 ай бұрын
Work part time or build up a nest egg before you marry.
@brightblack0
8 ай бұрын
That makes sense. Treating people well doesn't compel them to treat you well, so I get where you're coming from. Not a woman, but I think it's important to build a community of friends and a lifestyle that supports your relationship, and a relationship that supports your lifestyle. Then, you aren't putting your social eggs in just one basket. Not a lot of people think of a marriage as a system of relationships, they think of it as just one relationship. But that spouse has to be willing to prioritize your feelings over his mom's, he has to give you the space to nurture your relationships with friends, and he has to appreciate you doing the same for him. I think if you find someone who helps you be a better sister, mother, and friend, and who you like solving problems with, you won't have to worry about divorcing them. As long as you expect him to appreciate you for doing the same thing, and he does show that appreciation, that might be the most security you can hope for.
@terry9238
8 ай бұрын
Building up a nest egg in addition to making your living expenses as you go takes decades. Build an occupation or career, with a decent income, and invest some of your surplus, before marriage. But don’t wait until you’ve accumulated a large nest egg before you even consider marriage! And sorry, but a PART TIME job doesn’t help you support yourself-or get a good full time job-if you have to. In earlier generations, many women learned that the hard way!
@tommywei4165
8 ай бұрын
another banger. good video, highlights the sad truth about dating
@liamo8932
8 ай бұрын
I can see this vid going down like a lead balloon with many of the women-folk
@Xenozillex
8 ай бұрын
Previous video "Womens' biggest issue is their ego" next video "SERVANTS take the money"
@liamo8932
8 ай бұрын
@Xenozillex The problem is that he is difficult to argue with from a reasoning and logic perspective once he gets into it. That is, unless your feelings around a subject are more important to you than either of those things...
@EE12CSVT
8 ай бұрын
@@XenozillexI know, good, isn't it 😊
@Xenozillex
8 ай бұрын
@@liamo8932 You're right. Women are loyal to logic and reasoning above all else.
@rodmarshall6747
8 ай бұрын
Love it!! Would also like to hear your take on the "mid-life" crisis and how it affects both the female and male psyche's in the context of the hypergamy vs. age vs. gender matrix. Feel free to include the 'unresolved childhood' issues as a wildcard..lol. Cheers and keep up the good work. PS. It is refreshing to hear a man to man perspective as we do seem to get lost in the woods of 'the modern man' personas that seem to be foisted upon us in these 'modern' times.
@laurenruth580
6 ай бұрын
One of the biggest issues I have with being of service as a woman is this - that my contributions are not seen as valuable as the man’s contribution. I totally get the economic advantage of one partner being the primary earner while another partner takes care of hearth and home, especially when there are small children to care for. This is great when done as a team, with both partners valuing the role each of them plays. IF our culture valued health, education emotional balance and other outcomes of “women’s work” as much as they valued money, then I think a lot more women would want to be in this role, especially during their child rearing years. There’s this assumption that being a homemaker is “less than” and there are so many men who will so easily abuse the power they hold in that type of dynamic, so it’s not surprising most women don’t want to give up their power in a situation by making themselves into a “servant” for a partner with more money. Just a thought - treat her with more respect and of course give her lots of orgasms, then maybe she will want to serve you more fully….
@FranzLorenzDivina
8 ай бұрын
“In order to obtain something out of nothing, something of equal value must be lost. That is Alchemy’s Law of Equivalent Exchange.” - FullMetal Alchemist
@riccardodiluca6862
8 ай бұрын
One of the reasons that makes me prefer to date older women is the fact that they already went through that transactional stage of dating (be it to have the best provider or "that" lifestyle) and when it doesn't work, they are more open to date with a different purpose. I've had 2 great relationships since I was 32 with older women and there were never material problems. Its like they understand that they are past their prime or at least only have a few good years left and they are more open to work on their personalities.
@klaas8912
8 ай бұрын
As guy in his early 20’s with current gf i can’t relate to that but still I more than believe in what you say considering female nature , Orion pin this guys comment its supreme👊
@riccardodiluca6862
8 ай бұрын
@@klaas8912 thanks bro. I also had a very nice young love when I was your age. Never had kids nor financial problems with her either. Guess I do not attract that type of women at all!
@profet1385
8 ай бұрын
@@riccardodiluca6862 me neither! im from Europe, Central Europe to be more precise. European women prefer more feminine men than USA women, that's a first, and secondly, I'm an artist, leaning towards relationships and freindships that are full of warmth, sinceritity, openness etc. which even more skews my "target" women towards those that prefer even more feminine men. Most of the "redpill problems" that USA-based content creators talk about don't bother me, never did
@klaas8912
8 ай бұрын
@@riccardodiluca6862 i really love my girlfriend and she has all wifey material behaviors but i sometimes forgot that she’s not holy mary but still woman and of course i do see specific female behaviour in her no matter her amazing qualities so lot of times i have mindfuck but solution is always to accept that female nature ( no matter that sometimes it can be extermly selfish and manipulative ) and operate accordingly
@ThorMaximus
8 ай бұрын
It’s always a transactional stage, this doesn’t end. What you’re paying for & with may seem different, but it’s still a transaction. They don’t love you for you until it’s at the end of the run. It just doesn’t work that way.
@gogo-bi9qh
8 ай бұрын
Now days, every married man I know is the servant.
@prakash7921
8 ай бұрын
This man has cracked the code ❤
@elainer8288
8 ай бұрын
There has to be a balance in giving. I 100% agree. If a woman is not contributing 50%-50% with money they should compensate with housework. I agree. It's just common sense. That's why women who want more freedom should work hard to make more money or be single and only date the men who has more money. Each one can pay their own bills and do their own housework this way. I think the real problem is a lot of people being too selfish; always wanting the arrangement to benefit them more than the other person.
@HaganeHiryu
8 ай бұрын
This is an excellent explanation.
@stevejakab
8 ай бұрын
Spot on!
@MarcelAlbeawsome
8 ай бұрын
Doctor Spitting Truth!
@threeone6012
8 ай бұрын
So much gold on this channel.
@phantomplastics6582
8 ай бұрын
Thanks!
@georgedaviotis3016
6 ай бұрын
Great video Dr! However, I'd like to point out a discrepancy: you mention that you do not engage in corporate sponsorships or product placements, yet by encouraging others to share this link, you are, perhaps inadvertently, promoting KZitem-a corporation that you are paid by. Additionally, you advertise your course, which could be considered a form of product placement, especially if it's mentioned in the comments section. Please understand, I love your work, and my intention is not to annoy you. I'm merely highlighting a few potential oversights that could be relevant to your professional ethos.
@nikeisagreekgoddess4135
8 ай бұрын
Good for you for saying there *might* be a biological component to hypergamy. The truth is that we just don't know. If you look at it in relation to codependency, I find it easier to notice an enormous societal component to hypergamy. The inability to see yourself as someone capable of facing life with your own resources, lacking resilience, needing an external source to feel safe, etc. All these things make perfect sense for a person that has not been given the position to deal with life on their own. This means hypergamy very possibly is a behavior stemming from mental illness or a lack of development in an adult woman. It should be easy to see how the biological markers for attraction that we don't question, are associated with beauty and physical attributes. Anything else is just harder to defend on a biological basis. If we have been around for 300k years and women have been willingly facing many aspects of life on their own for around 60 years, it seems to me like there is A LOT of conditioning to be undone before you can tell hypergamy is biological. They have been conditioned to depend on men for thousands of years. Now they can even have children on their own and go through the whole pregnancy alone. How is it rational to think you can tell what it is if the smoke just started dissipating?
@Leoo117
8 ай бұрын
The doc doesn't know what he is talking about. You are more insightful. Hypergamy is a toxic lifestyle choice. Its usually motivated by some type of trauma or taught toxicity like you eluded to. Its not biological. Saying its biological is an excuse for men that don't understand women and are having trouble attracting the type of woman they want. Instead of humbly trying to understand what the issue is in his own behavior, he arrogantly blames women by making up stuff about how hypergamy is biological. Its just an excuse to not have to self-reflect.
@budbas
8 ай бұрын
8:35 , it might be true if sexual attractiveness is the intention for building relationship. And that would bring us the question of what is the initial intention for building a relationship. For me, what I found is, after 20 years of marriage, she is still have comparable status, since she becoming much better mother for our children. The center of gravity of our relationship shift slowly from me/her, to our children, as time passes by. And that is what I foresee long time ago before I get married, by looking at my parents relationship as an example.
@thedualtransition6070
8 ай бұрын
Congrats for a healthy marriage! There are many out there, but they are becoming harder and harder for the younger generations with the increasing narcissism and shallowness driven by our society.
@Diatom1k
8 ай бұрын
@@thedualtransition6070💯💯💯
@budbas
8 ай бұрын
@@thedualtransition6070 Thank you 🙏. I started following this kind of topic months ago when my twin son was 18 to learn their world so can help to oversee them. But, just to project 10 years when they'll be ready to set their own family worries me a lot. Really have no idea what world they'll live in by the next 15-20 years.
@ketchewmifowler2199
8 ай бұрын
I think you are totally right, I greatly appreciate your information.
@jtrealfunny
8 ай бұрын
I watch a lot of your channel, great content. I don't see how hypergamy and women's debt to their resource provider diminishes patriarchal oppression since the latter seems so much broader and pervasive. The observations at the end about the hypergamy continuing even as the need or value of it goes down are really great.
@cosmictreason2242
8 ай бұрын
You're first question Diane make sense
@jenniferkopp2923
8 ай бұрын
I don’t know why women get their panties in a twist. Everybody serves somebody or some thing men have to go to work and serve another man. Men also need help from other men, so I don’t see see what the big deal is used to be called labors of love
@adrianl8429
8 ай бұрын
Cheers for all the great content! Would you mind sharing who is the artist for the thumbnail illustrations?
@icfubar9150
8 ай бұрын
Agree that the theory of hypergamy as stated by O.T. as being a trade of differing services...but. I would suggest that this trade is of much larger inequality in a LTR in favor of women as domestic duties are shared on an equal pink/blue job basis even as resource gathering is not in hypergamous relations. The wealthy being the outlier. For men the juice has never been worth the squeeze unless the value of sex is greatly inflated over its true value and offering. This setting aside the desires of both men and women to want to share their lives with a compatible partner. Therefore the rules of engagement differ individually as what a particular woman or man want in a committed relationship, with the ensuing chaos in finding the right "fit."
@YouilAushana
8 ай бұрын
Its the parable of the talents, doc! You work and are awarded. Its up to you to take the risk and make it happen. I guess socialism works for women and free market capitalism for men's sense of risk and adventure.
@mikeleonel
8 ай бұрын
Great video, this is why passport bros is a thing, outside first world countries woman are willing to serve.
@TheMedWolf
8 ай бұрын
It all depends on how much you want to have kids. This is why the population is dropping in any country developed beyond basic meager subsistence. Reproduction has been separated from sex and reproduction is getting expensive. He never talks much about how kids factor into the equation.
@rob21
8 ай бұрын
He may have mentioned it in another video, but kids are the X factor that tilts the risks of marriage in favor of it.
@bettinaorevil5056
8 ай бұрын
Another great video 🎉
@imad4857
8 ай бұрын
I am a black pillar man , rated 5-6 (average looking) with fun light personality and luxurious bank account, and guess what? Personality doesn’t matter much when it comes to business.
@bobg5362
8 ай бұрын
This societal imbalance will not correct itself barring one of two things. 1) A global. societal collapse that sets our lifestyles back a couple of hundred years. 2) Affordable, realistic, AI companions that can satisfy men's sexual and emotional needs. We will almost certainly see one or the other within a generation at most.
@dharmadasa66
8 ай бұрын
#1 incoming
@christophers_verified
8 ай бұрын
Juicing the algo...Thanks for the great content!
@jonwilkinson3886
8 ай бұрын
A rasor sharp insight on reality good doctor.
@johnspivack
8 ай бұрын
Orion is a brilliant talker and great at stringing ideas together. But all he's really saying is that many 'modern' women have unrealistic expectations and are trying to impose unfair terms on the men. But maybe it is what it is.. Maybe many such women would actually rather have nothing or nothing that lasts than have to 'settle' for a relationship where they have to treat a partner fairly? This might just be so, after all, because the evidence of their life outcomes seem to show this preference pretty clearly.
@williammentink
8 ай бұрын
When women start to understand this, what color will this pill be?
@dharmadasa66
8 ай бұрын
It is still the black pill. Who says they will ever understand this or care? It is difficult to correct a person's view when their well-being and security requires them to ignore the truth.
@s0mekindof
8 ай бұрын
What makes you hope they will understand at all, at the first place.
@dvkdvkful
8 ай бұрын
15 years ago, when Zales had a lot of commercials on TV, my wife (seeing the Zales commercial "Every kiss begines with Zales"), quipped "If every kiss begins with Zales, you're dating or are married to a whore". True, that. I lucked out in who I married :)
@HugoCastroH
8 ай бұрын
Wow thats a really good content, thanks
@TravelingFoodBunny
8 ай бұрын
In rich families women don’t serve because the men paid for food/personal cook, house cleaning service, nanny, garden service etc. She might serve in other ways like being someone “safe” to talk to or hangout with after long day of work.
@bobg5362
8 ай бұрын
They still serve, it is just the chores that are different. They are still expected to bear offspring. They are also still expected to ensure the children are well-raised and the household well-maintained. They simply manage a staff that performs the labor instead of doing it themselves. They are also expected to accept if the male seeks extramarital satisfaction - especially if they fail to provide it themselves. That is, has always been, and will always be the price for a life of comfort and security both for themselves and their offspring in the hypergamistic model.
@strikingitrich7630
8 ай бұрын
Basically he provides tangibles and she provides intangibles. Sounds fair…..
@TravelingFoodBunny
8 ай бұрын
@@bobg5362 I agree with you until cheating part 🤣. To me, that’s how rich men dug holes for themselves, which jeopardizes half of their wealth in divorce. There should be a smarter way than that.
@dharmadasa66
8 ай бұрын
@@strikingitrich7630 One aspect of the 'intangibles' is that it is not enforceable under contract, such as marriage. The financial contribution can be quantified and the 'love and affection' cannot. So withdrawal of those intangibles does not materially or contractually affect the woman as it should, hence the 'price' signals are wrong.
@strikingitrich7630
8 ай бұрын
I agree with you. I was just being sarcastic. It's laughable that women believe their intangibles are equivalent to a mans tangibles. But that's why the current state of marriage is the worst deal ever.@@dharmadasa66
@theodoradee2840
8 ай бұрын
I'm a woman and I completely agree with everything you said. We understand that we can't have it both ways. The problem is that we also want the pay check because we've seen it too many times where the man gets bored or whatever and will simply walk out and move on and leave that woman with nothing. We work because we have to. We know we cannot depend on anybody else. The idea of the old housewife happily staying home with the kids while cooking and cleaning and then being completely submissive to her husband while he gives her an allowance while they all live happily ever after is a fairytale.
@chrisstone2506
8 ай бұрын
If you are so basic that you have trade resources for access to women, you missed the bus long ago. Evolve, man. You can’t dog on women if you can’t even keep up with them. The money/resource game is for utterly basic and undesirable guys. Sorry but it’s true. It’s only for guys that have nothing else compelling to put on the table. So in revue: be basic, play the dumb resource game. Or develop a you that compels women and short circuit this game (and btw, not all men are even playing this game and they are still winning)Don’t waste another second being mad about this topic. Don’t waste time worrying about “divorce law” or hypergamy, spend it becoming someone that adds value without money. God it’s so simple fellas.
@Dewane1511
8 ай бұрын
BRAVO !!! Well said !!!
@alex434343
8 ай бұрын
Dude, you still pay even if you're a giga-chad with a 6 pack. You just pay with watching your diet and hours at the gym and taking care of your skin/hair, etc. Or maybe you look like 10/10 with zero effort. If you do, then you are just paying with your inherited wealth of winning the genetic lottery there bro 🤣
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