"Anxiety doesn't care about things that are true or make sense, it just makes you feel the weight of the worst possible scenario." I felt that.
@SSIMS
2 жыл бұрын
Dangelo was being bad on Twitter so he caused it to himself
@NaturallyNavi
2 жыл бұрын
@@SSIMS what do you mean?
@amandaredd3057
2 жыл бұрын
that's right
@gordonramsayslambsauce
2 жыл бұрын
@@SSIMS what?
@shaiuuyu
2 жыл бұрын
same🥲
@cxxxcol9233
2 жыл бұрын
People severely underestimate how much anxiety can just take over your life. I’m glad you took time for yourself, we missed you
@MiraCassandre
2 жыл бұрын
Exactly!
@supertrollfaxnoprinter3329
2 жыл бұрын
L anxiety W dangleo
@themurrrr
2 жыл бұрын
THIS!
@simbamvp8175
2 жыл бұрын
Yes! And it can be so hard to tell to even close friends
@JiroYenn
2 жыл бұрын
Fr, everything becomes so draining and you feel like you just can't do anything and just stay in bed all day... Anxiety is no joke nor an aesthetic
@ijustgottadance
2 жыл бұрын
The whole “feeling like I need to know everything bad that’s going on” thing definitely struck a chord with me. It’s so hard to find the balance between staying informed and getting consumed by all the bad shit. Glad to see you’re on an upward swing. Thanks for your candor.
@taliaa-444
2 жыл бұрын
@Don't Read Profle Photo these don’t work anymore lol
@Itsunclegabby
2 жыл бұрын
I try to stay informed, but I realize that peace begins with the Self. I can't hyperfocus on things beyond my control. What you give attention to grows, so I chose to grow (focus) on myself.
@sentientdonut
Жыл бұрын
An update for those of you who aren't in the discord: D'Angelo is okay! One of the admins let us know. He's doing much better now. :)
@BiRainbow29
Жыл бұрын
Thank goodness! I had joined his discord a while back, but haven't been active as much! I came to his video today worrying about him.
@madimuncie
Жыл бұрын
thank you for letting us know 🫶 I’m not in the discord and I’ve been v worried
@Overused_Toothbrush
Жыл бұрын
I was just checking up to see if there was an update. Thank goodness he’s okay :)
@kaalanightshade6841
Жыл бұрын
Glad to hear he's doing OK.
@thandi-NKOSI
Жыл бұрын
Thank God. Happy to hear that, health comes first
@shadrackakinkunmi
2 жыл бұрын
“My anxiety peaked” say no more. When I tell you I can relate to that on a spiritual level. We don’t need you to be perfect or even consistent at all, just please take care of yourself. Your mental health is more important than this app. We love you D’Angelo. ❤️
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑
@Evielicious
2 жыл бұрын
YOUR PFP YESSSS
@triinbean
2 жыл бұрын
This is accidentally the most comforting video I've ever seen. "I want to die sometimes, all the time, but I am doing all the things I need to prevent that feeling". I've never heard anyone explain how I feel so well. As someone who suffers from severe anxiety and depression well always, I am glad you took a break. I know it's hard to feel like you deserve that time off, but you do, and did. It's better to take that long break and take a minute than run yourself dry. So proud of you for doing that and even more amazed that you have been so open today. You are amazing.
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑..
@kiripedia
2 жыл бұрын
Yes, same here. I didn’t know other people felt that way too, and hearing it put into words so perfectly was very, very comforting to me
@triinbean
2 жыл бұрын
@@kiripedia exactly!! It’s so isolating at times especially when your friends aren’t that far gone, if that makes sense. Of course everyone has their demons but yeah, it can be hard even with good people in your life.
@triinbean
2 жыл бұрын
@@olliekoski7633 Yeah at some point it feels like it’s best to just accept it as a part of your life and to ride the waves when they come, not fight them.
@lubbydove
Жыл бұрын
u miss quoted him
@noviaperkins7641
2 жыл бұрын
I don’t think enough people understand the “I don’t wanna exist but I also can’t do anything to hurt myself” aspect of depression and anxiety. Not wanting to exist in any sense or context isn’t good, and people need to pay attention. Just because they aren’t physically hurting themself doesn’t mean they aren’t mentally damaging themself even further. I told my doctor this and she said “ok you sound pretty bad, but you don’t wanna physically hurt yourself so you don’t need medication or anything.” It’s really hard and just feels extremely lonely because you can’t even connect with other people with these disorders because you’re made to feel like you’re not as bad. If anybody else feels like this, I hope you realise you’re worth the time and effort it takes to get help, and you’re worth hanging around. You deserve to be here as much as anybody else, and you don’t have to be alone. Big thanks to D’Angelo for talking about that and bringing awareness to this less talked about aspect of mental illness
@fuwa9918
2 жыл бұрын
exactly right, And people and doctors should be catching people when their at this stage BEFORE they try to 'prove' that they need help through things like self injury or suicide. It's our jobs as people to make sure the people around us are ok and are getting the help they need. Because otherwise they will end up hurting themselves or others.
@lovepantalone_kaeya
2 жыл бұрын
SH// I swear I tried to self harm to "feel something" but I was too scared. And I feel like no one takes me seriously. Thanks for this.
@zouwu4487
2 жыл бұрын
I used to say "I don't wanna die, I'd just like to stop" Most definitely resonates
@sergentculotte2147
2 жыл бұрын
Been relating for years to that line from that Robbie Williams song : "I don't wanna die, but I ain't keen on living either".. didn't know anyone who also felt this way ! I guess it's validating to some degree that other people feel the same....
@gordonramsayslambsauce
2 жыл бұрын
@@lovepantalone_kaeya Tw//sh and a little backstory?? I take you seriously, because I've been there (and I would even if I hadn't been there). Before I started, I was so fucking scared of hurting myself because all I wanted was a solution. A way to exert control over my situation because there was nothing else I could do. I didn't take myself seriously because I started with a freaking butter knife in like fifth grade. and then i extended to a steak knife, shaving razors, blades, and so on. I thought that in order to get help I had to be a certain "kind" of suicidal. It's so fucking scary now. I try to get clean but I've become so attached to the feeling that stopping for long isn't plausible anymore. I highly recommend other coping mechanisms. The website "Fatal to the Flesh" really helps me to see the scars without inflicting them on myself. I also scribble on myself with sharp pens. I really really hope you don't ever take up self harm for your sake and that you improve mentally. Stay safe
@tashawilliams7229
Жыл бұрын
I love your content and I check back every once in a while to see if something new has posted. Thing is dont forget that you don't have to "keep up" with the pace of dropping videos every week, or even every month or even every year. You don't owe KZitem or your followers anything! You make great content which will keep people checking back and interested in the new content when it drops! Don't worry about trying to become a machine to keep up with other KZitemrs arbitrary video drop schedules. It's okay to do it when you want to, and stop when you want to.
@tashawilliams7229
Жыл бұрын
I have an anxiety disorder, and keeping up with the standards that I hold myself to is nearly an impossible weight. I often think that the people I love find me lacking, boring, self centered, etc. I never feel as if I can live up to what I think they want. But something I've learned recently is that the reality in my head is not reality. The fears and the pressure that keep churning are my brains way of trying to keep me safe and protected by keeping me on my toes. I often need to remind myself that it's okay to slow down and it's okay not to be perfect and it's okay not to shoulder everything at once.
@ladyrain299
Жыл бұрын
@@tashawilliams7229 you described my anxiety to a t. 'If I'm not perfect, what's my value?' Which of course is crippling and then you bury yourself.
@SuperSilverJay
Жыл бұрын
@@tashawilliams7229 something else you can try is being okay with them thinking those things about you. It is normal to not like someone all the time. We don't even like ourselves all the time. But people are usually understanding and forgiving. Siblings are a great example of this. Most siblings get annoyed with each other a lot but they still care about each other.
@neltins5308
Жыл бұрын
I'm just really happy black men are allowed to have emotions now in modern day, it took a very very long time for this to even be acceptable for black men in America
@The_Sin_Squad
2 жыл бұрын
Oh my god, you put it into words. I can't imagine the subscriber-count scale of what you're dealing with, but after getting out of school I got a book deal for two graphic novels, and hoooo boy. I was able to churn through pages for the publisher for maybe six months, but like you said, I couldn't sustain myself. There's so much pressure to create, but you're stuck with zero spoons and this constant mantra of "I wanna die, I wanna die"...coupled with the guilt of like, "You should be happy! Look how lucky and successful you are!" How are you supposed to explain to people with soul-sucking jobs that you have their dream job-the job they'd give an arm and a leg to have-but you can barely force yourself to get out of bed in the morning? That you're so miserable and anxious that life HURTS? That the fun-hobby-turned-profession makes you hate yourself every day to the point of immobility, or that "nothing" black hole? I felt so alone because I didn't know how to talk about this stuff. So hearing you speak about this...I'm so grateful. Thank you so much. I feel seen.
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑..
@fannidemeter4996
2 жыл бұрын
You *are* seen 💜 I've been paralyzed by anxiety and depression for this past year, it literally didn't allow me to go to school bc my panic attacks got horrible- but I'm getting better slowly. So I somewhat understand what you mean, it's so difficult to lose interest in the things you once loved. A horrible feeling :( But you're never "too lucky" or "too successful" to suffer, you are allowed to feel. I hope you'll feel somewhat better soon, but it's okay if not. We're just happy you're here 🤗 Lots of hugs sent your way
@char_shine
2 жыл бұрын
@don't be surprised your gonna get ur account banned if u dont stop the spam. Or maybe ur account has been hacked. In that case I'm so sorry
@The_Sin_Squad
2 жыл бұрын
@@fannidemeter4996 This reply really means a lot. Thank you so much
@littlegirlblue6326
2 жыл бұрын
no job or career is gonna cure mental illness. i feel like the 'wellness', motivational speakers of the world make us think that gratitude can cure everything
@Thumin
2 жыл бұрын
We missed you so much D. I feel like so many of us relate to feeling hopeless but I just hope that u know that we all care about u and ur so so precious. Depression is no joke and I'm glad u put ur mental health first. We love and care about u and will wait for when ur ready. I'm sending love ur way!! 😭😭💖💖💖
@Whydoyallkeeptalkingtokids
2 жыл бұрын
Fr😭
@blizzard_the_seal9863
2 жыл бұрын
THUMINNN omg
@SADIE_Maybe_SADISTIC
2 жыл бұрын
True~!🥺😭✨
@JOKERWOKER_
2 жыл бұрын
@EDP445 🅥 hi edp445
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑
@HannahBayles
2 жыл бұрын
What people don’t realize is being a creator is an almost entirely isolating experience. Especially if you edit your own videos like you do, you spend all day only with yourself. It can become really lonely and dissociating tbh. And if your brain is in a rough spot, the darkness finds you quickly. Glad to have you back. Take care of yourself. You’ve got an audience of people who support YOU! ❤️
@saphirothplaysbad4708
2 жыл бұрын
I find creating this divide between creator and person is the problem in the first place... putting yourself on a pedestal and creating expectations is damaging and when the public does it too it's whats isolating... creators are people and people do understand. Don't create divisions between being human. A job is a job regardless of what field. People are plagued by mental health problems regardless. Mental health illnesses don't ask who you are and cherry pick, it just happens. You isolate so many voices saying what you do. Students who are ordinary people crumbling under academic expectations go through this, ordinary office workers feel similar when they feel stuck doing something maybe they didn't see themselves doing when they were a child. People do understand. The only expectations I have for public content creators is hoping they're doing what they enjoy and finding success in their field which is what we all should collectively have for each other. Maybe it's just me who has these thoughts.
@lizabee484
2 жыл бұрын
Not being a content creator and seeing how many creators that I watch suffer from anxiety and isolation and depression and so many other stressful things (that I cannot relate to bc I’m not a content creator) makes me hope they are able to find a community of other content creators that can be friends and provide a support system, people that can actually understand the struggles that come along with being a content creator and be able to provide support and understanding in a way that their audience cannot. I’m running on like 2 hours of sleep rn so I have no clue if any of this makes sense, but my point is I just want y’all creators to be able to find others who understand what you’re going through and hopefully you’ll feel less isolated. 😅☺️❤️
@JoyDawnHackett
2 жыл бұрын
Sorry this is totally unsolicited, but my therapist told me to cultivate my friendships. If you got people that you haven’t talked to in a long time, reach out and catch up. Doesn’t mean they will be ready to hear about the dark stuff, but having support for even the little things (“ah my upload failed”, “my family’s being weird”, “my cars going through it”), will help lighten the load. That way it doesn’t all combine at once, especially when the darkness comes back.
@kestendavis8753
2 жыл бұрын
@@JoyDawnHackett You just cultivated sharing. Cultivating friendships and relationships is so so so important to human mental health!! We are social animals and making sure you have a circle of true friends who are mutually supportive is important. Over the last 3 years that work and spending (almost completely virtual) time with my cultivated friends had saved my sanity!!
@TheeBratzDollxox
2 жыл бұрын
@@JoyDawnHackett damn this is so good!! I’m gonna keep this in mind, thank you so much for sharing this even if “unsolicited” it lit a lightbulb 💡 in me lol 🥰❤️
@carmenishere
Жыл бұрын
This video is what makes KZitem, KZitem. Thank you for your vulnerability and honest, relatable words. A lot of us have the same issues and problems. It makes life so much more doable when you know you’re not in this alone. Take as much time as you need D. We will all be here for you💖
@SatisfyingLullabyAsmr
Жыл бұрын
Very well said, and I agree completely.
@londonsplayroom5267
Жыл бұрын
This nigga a victim your generation is full of gay cowards
@LukeAlexander
2 жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry you're going through a hard time D'Angelo. You are loved, admired and cared for. Please take care of yourself and love yourself. You are an amazing person and an amazing creator. Sending you a virtual hug ❤️
@kellyyy1333
2 жыл бұрын
awwww my fav two ytbers!! i love you
@ebbietee98
2 жыл бұрын
♥️♥️
@ckevorkianxo
2 жыл бұрын
LUKE IS WHO I THOUGHT OF AFTER CLICKING!!! We need to fix our world when we’re so educated, yet still made to feel so ashamed for simply not being okay. Ily both, take care of yourselves ♥️
@strawberry-squid6511
2 жыл бұрын
hearing you talk about burnout was really comforting. reading statistics and symptoms only goes so far; so hearing someone share my symptoms basically to the letter makes me feel a lot less alone. i suffered from burnout earlier this year, and i legitimately considered dropping out of school, and when i couldn't do that, suicide looked like the only option. but i survived, i survived and now that i'm out of school i feel so glad i'm alive to experience this happiness. this video makes it clear that legitimately, actually, i'm not alone. it means a lot to me and so many others that you were open enough to let the mask drop. thank you.
@user-oe7zu1ut1o
2 жыл бұрын
Congrats on surviving. I know how hard it is to overcome it, almost felt like I wouldn’t. Only up from here for all of us. Peace and love 💗
@foxley5374
2 жыл бұрын
I've never heard anyone talk about the physical pain that anxiety and depression can cause but it's so true and so horrible and often seems to go ignored compared to other symptoms. There's a few really important things in this video that I've never heard put into words before.
@UnleashedRevolver
2 жыл бұрын
yep, can confirm, i have fibromyalgia/other joint issues and migraines bc of my anxiety and depression from ptsd. there's no "discernable" cause, and that leads to imposter syndrome from there being "no reason"
@sweetsoverload9212
2 жыл бұрын
the chronic fatigue that comes from it no matter how many hours of sleep, rest, relaxation etc is so fucking exhausting. and the guilt of not being productive and you cant really understand why is actually purgatory
@bloom6081
2 жыл бұрын
@@sweetsoverload9212 This one right here is the one that fucks me up the most.
@arha13
2 жыл бұрын
@@sweetsoverload9212 At the worst my depression and anxiety has ever been, I could barely stand or sit up for more than an hour or two per day. People don’t believe it most of the time but someone else I knew had the same thing at the same time for the same reasons.
@user-iz9tn5fz5j
2 жыл бұрын
I have super bad stomach aches when my anxiety kicks in, sometimes even without knowing whats the cause and then when im thinking properly/more positive again the feeling just stays and it hurts like a shit ton, sometimes it feels like the acidic fluid in my stomach is just slowly burning a hole in my stomach. So when d’angelo mentioned something similar i felt really comforted because nobody really talks about it like you said.
@TheNerdyVixen
Жыл бұрын
I’m sad to see this is 6 months old now. I hope you’re doing okay. I know the struggle, but sometimes it helps to continue to share your story.
@sentientdonut
Жыл бұрын
I think we're all sad to see how long it's been, right? I hope he's better these days.
@skyefenton
Жыл бұрын
@@sentientdonut it’s been so long I hope he’s honestly doing the best
@LoneStarLadybug
Жыл бұрын
Y’all.. same.. my mental health is declining & im fighting to stay strong and get outta the Tomb stone mentality that is plaguing me and choking me out. Lost my dad & im struggling to cope. I have new diagnosis’ & am scared & was hoping I’d find a way to reach out and said hey!! HEY!!! Pls tell me you know you’re not alone! We’ve got these scars & issues but can exist together & in support of one another.. 🥺😣 I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.. 😢😢😢 but Fr bro!! Are you okay???
@lindsayb1329
Жыл бұрын
He's too talented and wholesome for this platform. 🙏💕
@NothingButDarkBlue
Жыл бұрын
I was just thinking about him and checked here too. I really hope he's doing okay.
@juliamajchrzak1967
2 жыл бұрын
When you talked about suicidal ideation and how you don't feel validated because you never actually attempted it - that really struck a chord with me, because I've been feeling the same way for years now. I felt like I can't call my thoughts "suicidal" because I never was at a "big enough risk" of actually doing it. Knowing that you also have been struggling with that, it makes me feel like I'm not alone. That my anxiety and thoughts and feelings aren't unique and therefore nobody could ever understand what I'm going through. Because I understand what YOU are going through. Thank you so, so much for this video.
@keira4840
2 жыл бұрын
I haven't watched the video yet, so sorry if he talks about this in it, but I've been the same way for much of my life. Between talking with my therapist and psychiatrist recently, they helped me realize I do this because I never learned healthy coping mechanisms for when I begin to feel overwhelmed-which is often. So instead, my brain jumps to suicide ideation, because the only way I know how to imagine getting out of that feeling is to imagine I wouldn't be here at all. So now, I'm working on catching it when I start to feel overwhelmed and putting "brakes" in between the emotion (anxiety, being overwhelmed, etc) and the thought (I have to die to stop feeling this way) so that I can deal with the emotions as they come in a way that doesn't feed into these thought patterns I've developed. I don't know if that's the same reason you've had these feelings before, or if it will resonate with anyone else who can relate, but I thought I'd chime in in case it helps anyone else out there get themselves out of the rut I'm clawing my way back out of currently.
@chonk_fox89
2 жыл бұрын
It reminds me of the song "Numb Little Bug" by Em Behold...it's really powerful and one line is "Do you ever get a little bit tired of life Like you're not really happy but you don't wanna die" and just hovering in that space of feeling...yea I could go either way.
@AdventuRyn_
2 жыл бұрын
Same here. It's been a number of years since I was in the absolute thick of it, but those feelings definitely get stronger sometimes. . And as another commenter mentioned, "Numb Little Bug" is such a relatable song.
@melissa2008
2 жыл бұрын
Same for me
@heidiiii5878
2 жыл бұрын
When you said "anxiety doesn't care about things that are true or make sense" I felt that & how physical it is, the effect it has on the body.. it's like a black hole. Thank you for sharing this 🖤🥀 it helped me a lot to see your face & hear your take on how these things have felt & effected you. So much love from me to you regardless if you choose to do KZitem or not.
@vampiregrrrlll
2 жыл бұрын
I really resonated when you talked about not feeling like you deserve to call yourself mentally ill. I was hospitalized earlier this year for mental health reasons and remember how hard it was feeling like I was the only person there who had “no reason” to be depressed. I’ve talked to my treatment friends and it’s the one thing we all seem to have experienced: feeling like you are never sick enough. Even the patients I met who were exactly the people my mental illness wanted me to be, reported this same feeling. It was never enough; we all wanted the others to get better but believed we didn’t deserve the same. I really had to change my relationship with social media, instead of watching the same romanticizing content that made me feel like my mental illness was who I am. Now I use Instagram and TikTok to indulge in things I enjoy and that make me feel better, like art, music and fashion. One thing I will say for anyone reading this, is that it truly does get better. I hardly recognize the person I used to be, and even though I still do struggle with mental illness, it is possible to turn your life around. Accepting treatment was the hardest thing I ever did, and I wish there was some magical wand I could wave to just make it all go away. But it had to be me who made it happen. It’s hard to see it when you’re in it, but it is possible.
@tine-9305
Жыл бұрын
The part about feeling like you're not allowed to talk about si/mental health because you know you'll be okay and you haven't *done* anything drastic.... I relate & was astounded that you actually said those words, explained that feeling, which has been so difficult for me. It felt incredibly validating to me. If anything, thank you for that. I hope you're doing okay and feeling better on the whole. You don't owe us anything.
@danijones8314
2 жыл бұрын
the way you explained the feeling of wanting to die yet not wanting to do it yourself really hit me. it’s the feeling i’ve dealt with for so long. it’s indescribable how strongly & deeply anxiety can take a hold on you. i completely understand anxiety being physically painful. some days i can’t breathe, not because i’m hyperventilating, but because my chest just *aches*. i’m disabled so i’m used to being in pain & i have a pretty high pain tolerance. but that ache in my chest is a kind of pain i can’t begin to explain.
@abigaelmacritchie1365
2 жыл бұрын
I used to feel like "I won't kill myself, but if there was a switch that could end all this, I would hit that" It seems like a normal response when you're in so much pain and can't see a way out...
@Puffley
2 жыл бұрын
I know that pain. 🥺🤍🫂
@chatnoir9038
2 жыл бұрын
It's like.. being passively s****dal. That's what I call it at least. I think a lot of people with substance addictions (alcohol, drugs) are this way.
@danijones8314
2 жыл бұрын
@@abigaelmacritchie1365 exactly. like if i didn’t have to actually do anything, i wouldn’t have said no to dying.
@danijones8314
2 жыл бұрын
@@chatnoir9038 that’s such a good name for it, sums the feeling up pretty well.
@KingAsante
2 жыл бұрын
you described anxiety & depression very well, I have experience similar things. Continue to put your mental health first. Thank you for being so open and vulnerable❤️ so many people out here that care about you as a human
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑..
@angielott83
2 жыл бұрын
I agree. When he said it’s not as much sadness, but just nothingness hit HARD. That’s totally it for me too
@HeroesAndHeroiness
2 жыл бұрын
@@angielott83 ✨anhedonia✨
@irradiated_woman8016
2 жыл бұрын
Bigtime. I experience depression the same way: an expansive, all-consuming _nothing_ that swallows up everything. There are long periods of my life I have little to no memory of because I was in a depressive episode. Memory comes from and is strengthened by experience, sensation, emotion, interest... depression takes all of that away.
@MelvinVonMTodd
2 жыл бұрын
We are all here for you. I go through the same content, and unfortunately I’m feeling this way today. Unfortunately, I go through this because of my father and his overbearing behavior to place me down. It’s disheartening he always finds insults and displays actions where I’m not good enough for society or not knowledgeable and can’t please him. I understand where you are coming from and battled through this matter for 20 years.
@drshwetadudi8786
Жыл бұрын
It breaks my heart seeing him so sad . I really just wanna hug this guy. I understand you yesterday i really had a really bad anxiety attak and i was crying so bad that Everything is just fucked and going downhill. And the next day i am like "lol" littrely i am not even joking. I won't do anything with my life and still be happy makes me angry on my self . Self harm did come in front but i just couldn't do it. I feel like everyone is just laughing at me . Everyone notices what i am doing and it sometimes even makes me start shaking in class. I know i always try to be a good person but yesterday i saw my childhood bully and that just made me go back to that shithole. Thanks for Sharing your story, I just want you too feel ok and do whatever you want . We are with you. P.s. sometimes it does make you read dark things that was me on Pinterest and i had to stop this ,so it's an amazing step to delete Twitter.
@Yokevin777
Жыл бұрын
Hug him for what😂😂😂 he can talk bs on people but can’t handle a lil mental health. Hopefully he kicks the bucket and joins aaron carter and everyone
@eypu999
Жыл бұрын
@@Yokevin777 wdym
@KaseyTheGolden
2 жыл бұрын
This video was all too real, but I'm glad to hear you've been taking steps to improve your mental health. Looking forward to the content (TM), no pressure!
@ancientsquid01
2 жыл бұрын
I love both of your content and it’s great to see you supporting each other. This video is very real and mental health is important.
@heyannabeth
2 жыл бұрын
omg my faves!!!!!!!
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑....
@snoopy_poopy
2 жыл бұрын
oh wow hey kasey :D
@SSIMS
2 жыл бұрын
Dangelo Wallace is so fake
@fourcatsandadog1519
2 жыл бұрын
Had to stop 5 minutes in just to say this: as someone who HAS tried: your depression is valid. You don’t have “less” and I don’t have “more” just because of attempts. Depression is a thousand-headed beast and it shows a different, ugly face to each of us. Stay strong; we love you
@kaitlin9288
2 жыл бұрын
"Depression is a thousand-headed beast and it shows a different, ugly face to each of us." Goddamn, that's a powerful analogy. Can I steal that? haha
@fourcatsandadog1519
2 жыл бұрын
@@kaitlin9288 absolutely!
@ghoultooth
2 жыл бұрын
Thankyou for this, I honestly needed to hear this lately. Sorry to vent, but I cannot work because of my depression yet I feel like I have nothing to show for WHY I’m depressed if that makes sense? I’ve been through trauma in relationships and family and I have never found myself pushed to the point of suicide or intense self harm and it just makes me feel less-than when other people talk about how awful their depression is. To sum up, just thankyou for saying depression of all types is valid.
@vintazssi7126
2 жыл бұрын
I love the way you worded this.
@vintazssi7126
2 жыл бұрын
@@ghoultooth We’re all fighting this infinite headed beast together bruv. You’re not alone. I’m sending a virtual hug to you because internet 💖
@iJuliaJ
2 жыл бұрын
“Anxiety doesnt care about things that are true or make sense. Anxiety makes you feel the weight of the worst possible scenario, even if you aren’t in it.” Very well said
@sunmi2539
2 жыл бұрын
!
@cre-k8-ive
2 жыл бұрын
I totally feel this. For me, I always have to remind myself that it's okay to feel emotions but I can't let it impact my actions. But it sucks to constantly feel like there's another shoe that will drop.
@manders8698
Жыл бұрын
I’m sad that I didn’t know this video existed until now but wow, everything you said resonated so much with my own mental health struggles and anxieties. Thank you for your vulnerability ❤
@elisa-beary
Жыл бұрын
Me too!! Just watching and I feel for him so deeply. I also understand in my own way with my own mental health. I respect his honesty deeply. It’s gotta be a hard one to make, albeit helpful to so many.
@captainbubblebath3330
Жыл бұрын
@@elisa-beary Same here, only just stumbled across this video. When he talked about ideation (without any actual sh or plans to do so), I felt that in my soul - that's been a hallmark of my depressive struggles too. It makes it so hard to talk about. I'm glad he was able to share this with everyone, I'm hoping he's doing better now
@thisisit333
Жыл бұрын
He has just given so many of us validation. I absolutely feel the same feelings. I suffer from major depressive disorder, and I also have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome which sadly exacerbates my mental health. I’m so glad he took time and although he’s back, he’s still taking care. 💜💜💜
@syntowin5504
2 жыл бұрын
"Depression for me is like I feel nothing and it hurts" Genuinely found it difficult to shake off the way you put this. I really understand and deal with depression in this way, especially as someone personally dealing with bipolar mood swings, and not a lot of people understand how it feels. I'm really happy youre back (and I really found it touching that you showed vulnerability in making this video), keep putting yourself forward and ill be here when you are able to upload
@letrangeinconnu
2 жыл бұрын
i'm also bipolar and my depressive episodes mostly consist of that nothingness feeling. it feels so much worse than being sad or upset because at least sadness makes me feel something. i wish i knew how to explain it better to others than just "i feel empty inside" because i feel like words can't fully describe how much it actually eats away at you. so just know that you're not alone!! wishing you the best, bipolar disorder is a real nasty monster to deal with but it's possible to overcome it!!
@syntowin5504
2 жыл бұрын
@@letrangeinconnu thank you so much! I appreciate hearing that im not going through this alone!
@xanectric1352
2 жыл бұрын
"feeling the weight of the worst possible scenario even if you aren't in it" is the best way that I have ever heard anxiety described. it's easy to realize that the things that you are thinking aren't true or real, but it's so much harder to stop thinking them and feeling them
@caradanellemcclintock8178
2 жыл бұрын
It makes me sick that he was going through all of this while CreepShowArt was busy saying bad things about him and I pray he doesn't see her comments
@pearachu5363
2 жыл бұрын
I kinda wanna copy this to help explain to my family haha
@edelleaa
2 жыл бұрын
yeah.. it just makes you feel crazy because you often know it's irrational but you can't just stop it... it's an automatic response
@yukiandkanamekuran
2 жыл бұрын
It also makes me think that maybe it's important for him to disconnect and learn better emotional boundaries. It's okay to say fuck it.
@SSIMS
2 жыл бұрын
Dangelo is trying to justify selfishness
@PettyUniversity
2 жыл бұрын
The amount of respect and appreciation I have for you is massive, and only grows larger after watching this. I have faced EXACTLY (in my own way) the challenges you speak of regarding anxiety, depression, and the truly emptying trap of not wanting to be here, yet still being here. You, my dear, are a gift, however you are, regardless of if you share any of it with us or not. I’m cheering you on when you speak, and cheering you on when you don’t. If you ever want to talk, vent, or simply exist in the vicinity of someone who has lived very similar things in the life of social media as a creative, I’m here. Wishing you clarity, gentleness, and new breath for an ever renewing take on life. 💙
@Estelahojas8920
2 жыл бұрын
You are always so well spoken Swoop loved this comment and I hope d’angelo finds some peace
@MosebjadiMo
2 жыл бұрын
You are literally the absolute best ❤️❤️❤️
@SSIMS
2 жыл бұрын
Dangelo doesn't respect us
@misssgirrlllllllll5380
2 жыл бұрын
Yes mama swoop we love you miss thing ❤️
@bewitchedbanshee
2 жыл бұрын
This comment is beautiful
@blessd5062
Жыл бұрын
Anxiety and depression doesn’t need a reason … all it needs is a moment. Thank you for being open with the world about you and your struggles, that was very brave. Much love to you and many prayers and blessings.
@lemwezzer63
2 жыл бұрын
Take it from an old man who's been riding this rock around the Sun for 50 plus years. You have a rare combination of an intelligent open mind and a big beautiful heart. Sometimes that combination takes its toll. So just remember this, and this is my own opinion, you make the world a much more livable place. And this video shows just how brave and wonderful you are. I wish you peace, I wish you love, and I hope you find contentment.
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑...
@AM-gt1yt
2 жыл бұрын
This comment is beautiful. It always makes me smile to see older people who are open minded to Mental health bc of the lack of representation 40/50 yrs ago compared to today. I love people like you who are open to learning new information and being so empathetic. Not that theres not progressive boomers and Gen Xers and such, but the bad ones are always highlighted, just like my generation - millennials, but im on the cusp with Gen Z apparently - and theres a lot of hate for my generation so theres a lot of stories painting us in a bad light as well. All that to say - your commment made me smile. Thats all. Have a good day, you deserve it. And thanks for making my afternoon with your empathy.
@laluna3738
2 жыл бұрын
Eloquently put ❤️
@lemwezzer63
2 жыл бұрын
@@AM-gt1yt I thank you very much for your sentiment. I found over the years that every generation has its good, bad, and it's indifferent. And I'd like to share something with you about your generation. You're far more open to mental health issues and an understanding of interpersonal struggles. From my late teen years to my 30s, the only time you ever heard about a mental health issue was usually at the tail end of some tragedy. I live my life by one simple principle. It's easier to find understanding in others if you're willing to accept and understand yourself. Again, thank you.
@avafleitas-rolfs2329
2 жыл бұрын
no one ever talks about the part of depression where you really are trying and doing your best, and it still isn't good enough. or the guilt of not being what society deems "depressed". i never knew anyone else felt this. thankyou
@deprimada3560
2 жыл бұрын
This hits really hard
@Rastrick92
2 жыл бұрын
Identical struggles here. Some days are “fine” but mostly empty. Bad days are… intolerable.. We’re paddling in the same water.. but always alone in our boats. Thank you for sharing your story. It’s actually pretty badass to keep going even when we feel like pathetic, dead worms. ✌️ ♥️
@mckennascherer8991
2 жыл бұрын
f*ckin love this comment. felt this, screenshotted it to look back at later. you’re dope.
@tnsmom
Ай бұрын
I just watched this. I felt this whole video, the way you described your depression and anxiety was spot on. I have had dark thoughts like you since I was 9 ( I’m now 55) I’m glad to see you’re better now that you feel able to upload content. Thank you for sharing your struggles with mental health, it does make a difference to people to know that they’re not alone. Love from the U.K.
@liyahmeridy7997
2 жыл бұрын
We are not owed this transparency, but it is so so appreciated to see you again and to hear about your experience with depression and anxiety.
@UnicornUniverse333
2 жыл бұрын
My heart chakra feels such Light from listening to him, I hope I can heal my throat chakra and be speaking up too
@Bowblax2
2 жыл бұрын
Anxiety is so debilitating. I have medication for it but it still effects me daily. Glad you're doing better now D'Angelo :)
@brenhughes9395
2 жыл бұрын
Good job Regan
@Purplethingyt
2 жыл бұрын
Did not expect someone as based as you to enjoy D'Angelo content but welcome!
@itsMalma
2 жыл бұрын
citalopram changed my life. i was STUCK
@TangentialTif
2 жыл бұрын
“Anxiety doesn’t care about what’s true or what makes sense” I’ve never heard a better explanation. I’m so glad you took the time you needed, got help, and are being kinder to yourself. I love your videos and I’m excited to watch whatever you create next.
@mindtsunami9443
2 жыл бұрын
@Don't Read Profle Photo you’re really gonna self promo on a video about someone’s fight for their life?
@Eerie0Innocence
2 жыл бұрын
When you explained depression as “nothing”, I completely got it. It’s the same for me. It’s not a sadness. It’s an emptiness, and it’s a painful emptiness. Cuz you need something to be there. A figurative hand that grabs yours and reminds you you’re alive. But…there’s nothing there. It’s maddening. Also yeah. Social media is designed to activate the chemicals in your brain that give you positive reinforcement. Drugs and alcohol do the same thing only they have more physical side effects to go along with it.
@oshinofalakoju5749
2 жыл бұрын
When he explained it that way, it made so much sense to me. Wow.
@mrmistyeyed_
2 жыл бұрын
Ironically, in my experience drugs and social media made me feel numb and empty. Both made it so I couldn't grab onto a single thought, I couldn't actually experience anything it was just mindless
@milk.meister.mcChonky
2 жыл бұрын
In my experience, the closest feeling to it is when the power goes out and everything falls suddenly quiet. The electronic hum that you never noticed is suddenly gone, leaving a deeper silence. The world is missing something you never realized it had, and it feels very strange and unsettling. It's just.. empty.
@Jess-ew3tm
2 жыл бұрын
The aftermath of clinical depression is WILD as well..Like you're not "depressed" anymore but the anxiety may still linger and the nonchalantness from the side effect of depression still is around even if you begin to feel again...Ever since i had a spiritual awakening ive been able to feel EVERYTHING!! Which is better than feeling nothing bc atleast i know what it feels like to be alive...It's a journey for sure
@milk.meister.mcChonky
2 жыл бұрын
@@Jess-ew3tm there was a weird sense of apathy that stayed with me for months after I stopped really being depressed. I distinctly remember the first time I was genuinely happy to be alive again, rather than just "okay with it." I was finishing a run through the woods and looking at a couple of golden leaves on the ground. I felt so alive and everything was so perfect. Being grateful for life is something I never appreciated until having lost it for so long, but it was the most amazing feeling.
@pankace3296
2 жыл бұрын
Dude, there is NOTHING pathetic about dealing with anxiety. That's the exact opposite of pathetic. You as a content creator are so genuine and have so much respect from all of us who love your videos. None of us will judge you for sharing your problems. If you aren't in a place right now to upload things, don't upload things. We would rather have you safe and finding ways to get better than have more content from you. I am praying for you and I hope you know that we will be here for you when (or if) you do decide you are ready to come back. Take care of yourself, man. Before anything else, that is most important.
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑....
@Bwapbwapfrog
Жыл бұрын
I miss him but I hope he’s chilling and just doing his own thing. If he ever chooses to come back I honestly hope to god he posts whatever the fuck he wants without the pressure of his audience or whatever is stressing him out. I would write something thoughtful or emotional but I’m tired of people expecting more out of him than he can give. He’s human. Bro could post like 30 second videos of random shit or he could upload a 10 hour reverb of tv static and we’d love it. I just hope he’s happy now.
@marchadelemayjune
Жыл бұрын
i couldn’t have said it better fr
@Duck-mn8xp
2 жыл бұрын
HOLY SHIT dude the whole “I have to know everything bad happening all of the time” thing hits hardddddd I also really appreciate you talking about how depression isn’t just sadness all of the time for everyone. for me, it’s seething, inconsolable anger at everything in the world, so you can see how feeling like I have to know about every horrible thing can contribute to that. I just end up feeling like nothing I do will ever matter because there are always gonna be people hurting from things I can’t control. idk that specific part, feeling bad about not knowing every horrible thing in the world, feeling like that means you’re super privileged and only a part of the problem and blah blah blah blah blah. it really helped me to hear another person talking about that feeling
@skromnyasha
2 жыл бұрын
My depression is pain, like overwhelming emotional pain. Feeling like I have no control on anything and also helpless anger. The actions of one person did that to me, good times 👍
@jess-rob
2 жыл бұрын
YES i feel like i never see anyone talking about this part of depression/anxiety. the shame that comes with knowing you are one of the privileged (in whatever way) and yet you still feel hopeless and pitiful all the time. feeling so so angry at the world for the way that it is and not believing you can do anything to change it. social media specifically has worsened all of these feelings for me in the past few years. i know people joke about it rotting our brains but i genuinely think it is (at least for a lot of us)
@anony161
2 жыл бұрын
I hope you feel comforted knowing so many people can relate to what you’re experiencing and witnessing you just be honest without undermining mental illness is so healing. It’s enough just being seen. Here for whatever creation comes next, whenever you’re creating xx
@afroaesthete3701
2 жыл бұрын
I feel you when you talk about how pathetic it seems to you and that there’s no big thing that happened to explain. After graduation last December, I just…stopped. And I hated myself every day for not living, not doing, just existing and not even doing that well. I still feel like I can’t. It feels stupid, but every millimeter forward is worth celebrating. My friends can’t understand why it’s such a big deal for me that I actually fed myself and left my bed every day for a week straight. Or why I feel so accomplished after making a 3 minute call I have avoided making for months. But these tiny victories make the next, bigger one seem doable. Step by step. I’ve never watched any of your other videos before, but I see you and I’m so proud of you.
@bluupers9695
2 жыл бұрын
I’m sorry your friends don’t understand. You are doing amazing and I’m proud of you ❤️
@d.lan3y
2 жыл бұрын
recovering from a deppressive spell like that is like recovering from any other illness, on a much larger scale. "i could eat today", "i could sit up today", "i felt strong enough to go for a walk today". every tiny victory should be celebrated, because it means you feel, however minutely, better today than you did yesterday. i don't know you, man, but i'm proud of you. i've dealt with similar stuff and it's hard. keep celebrating the little victories. they do get bigger eventually.
@michellewells4631
2 жыл бұрын
I totally get this. Sometimes I have anxiety over the simplest thing like calling the bank to have a fee removed. I'd rather just pay the fee than to have to deal with it. And most of the time, the hardest part is getting the motivation to start a task. I have found that if I don't keep procrastinating and putting things off like doing the dishes, it makes me feel better and it really doesn't take long at all. Sometimes if you can just get yourself started on a small task, it gets the ball rolling and then you could be like, well while I'm at it, I'd might as well get this and this done too and it really does make you feel accomplished and better about yourself. Life is super monotonous especially when you work at a place you don't especially love going to. sometimes it's like, what's the point of life? Just know that there is a purpose for you and you are loved. Hugs
@Idiocracyhasbecomereality
2 жыл бұрын
As someone who’s been similarly struggling with motivation, you’ve got this. Celebrate every millimeter forward like it’s a mile. Lots of people don’t understand and they don’t have to- just know you’re not alone. I feel you.
@dulcevin7113
2 жыл бұрын
Almost exactly the same thing has been happening to me. And its excruciating. Its pain that's hard to explain in words. But it eats at you every day. I hope we can all get our strength back, whoever is going through this. ❤ 💙 💜 💖 💗
@Kitschune24
Жыл бұрын
It's comforting to see someone with similar issues talk about it. If it's any consolation, I don't think this video was a mistake.
@fujin04
2 жыл бұрын
The part where D'Angelo talked about "just not feeling anything" really hit me hard. I've always had trouble explaining that I'm just... numb. My close ones have never understood what it means to feel a void that consumes everything I should be experiencing. It makes me feel relieved to know that I'm not the only one, and I'm very grateful for this video. Anyway, I can''t wait for future content, we missed you!
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑..
@dysmissme7343
2 жыл бұрын
You’re not even almost the only one 💜
@jk2000jk
2 жыл бұрын
I agree for me it's some sort of unexplainable emptiness that just stops me feeling anything
@felwinterslie8223
2 жыл бұрын
If it helps at all, the word for it is apathy and it's a very real thing
@nacuyong
2 жыл бұрын
exactly i think he explained it better than i could ever have. it just feels like you’re just wasting time… passing by and yet you still are there just breathing and existing and nothing happens…
@phobaphobia7174
2 жыл бұрын
'I don't feel like I'm allowed,' is so important because we gaslight and belittle our own trauma as if we have to earn it. We don't. It just is. I hope you the best DW.
@qafgurlbandj5972
2 жыл бұрын
This is SO true. I'm working on not doing this so much anymore.
@meghansullivan6812
2 жыл бұрын
Self gaslighting is sooooo fucked and real
@kittee6409
2 жыл бұрын
I actually started crying when you talked about being so incredibly suicidal but not doing anything. I've been struggling with that for such a long time feeling like I wasn't that bad or my feelings were invalid just because I knew I wouldn't actually do it. I've never heard anyone else say that before. Thank you for sharing this.
@dewilew2137
2 жыл бұрын
♥️♥️♥️
@dai9730
2 жыл бұрын
❤️
@Pancakeifye
2 жыл бұрын
you are not alone I struggle with the same thing ❤️❤️
@adyaparamitaputripratama2786
2 жыл бұрын
Hi, I hope you're doing well now. And, I guess I found myself a friend since I knew how it felt. It went back in April of this year when I realized my friendship had been broken off and... I guess it's where I hit rock bottom and bam.. I went through a moment of thinking to commit sv1c1d3 but I just can't. I envision myself doing it... However, I can't do it for idk why. And this isn't the first time it happened. I went through something similar like this back in HS days.
@weronikashysha
2 жыл бұрын
suicide ideation is usually one of first steps on the road to suicide - so if you're feeling invalid in your experience just know that.
@MsWeeBeast
Жыл бұрын
I watched this video within minutes of it being uploaded and came back to say that we miss you. Hopefully you’re taking a break for reasons that aren’t causing you pain (depression and anxiety that you talked about). Wishing you happiness and success in all that you do, and when you’re ready to come back to KZitem we’ll be receiving you with open arms. We miss you!!!!!
@eypu999
Жыл бұрын
Same :(
@drey6930
Жыл бұрын
Right
@temmiemossy
2 жыл бұрын
this video is... relieving, in a way. I've never had someone describe exactly what I feel-- the nothingness, emptiness, the constant weight and pit that feels awful because I don't feel, the SI but the inability(? unwillingness?) to act upon it... im almost relived now knowing that someone knows exactly what I'm going through, though I wish you didn't have to. glad to see you again, take your time and know you owe us no obligations. thank you for this
@_asitis_
2 жыл бұрын
Every time you said “idk if that makes sense” after you explain anxiety, depression, and addiction of social media was a direct reflection of how myself and many others feel. You put it in such beautiful words, so thank you for your over explaining. (I also feel the need to do over explain.) I think your explanation could be a light bulb moment for many people who’ve struggled but could never find the words. 👏👏👏
@BritneyT.
2 жыл бұрын
Yes!
@icyyou3837
2 жыл бұрын
@Don't Read Profle Photo I won't 😃👍🏻
@NYCluver1
2 жыл бұрын
I can’t begin to explain how it felt to hear someone else that I don’t know personally explain how I felt in terms of my anxiety and depression but especially when you spoke about the suicidal ideation. I’ve always felt like a poser almost (for lack of better words) because when I’ve heard people speak about their depression or suicidal thoughts, they have inflicted self harm or have attempted it. I never have and I know I will not but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to not be here when I get really low or thinking about how I can put myself in a situation that I know would make me not be here. I didn’t know how to identify what that was until this video (not that I’m self diagnosing. It’s just like you hit the nail on the head while I was still looking for the hammer). I appreciate you sharing your experience and look forward to your new content whenever you do feel ready to upload 🤍
@pembrokelove
2 жыл бұрын
You don’t have to hurt yourself for your pain to be valid. I hope you are able to address it now that it has a name.
@micromikayla
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for being another person, as well as him, to validate I'm not the only one with just ideation portion 🤍 it's so nice to see other people understand such a weird spot
@corbanekarel3692
2 жыл бұрын
Yep. I waited too long to ask for help because of imposter syndrome with mental illness. I felt like I was stealing someone's spot. Then I went to a psychiatrist because I thought I might have an attention deficit disorder and when the doctor looked at my file, he told me I was one criteria away from borderline personality disorder and that he strongly suspected bipolar type 2. I was like "and I taught I couldn't possibly need help'' lol.
@kestendavis8753
2 жыл бұрын
@@pembrokelove this!!!
@kestendavis8753
2 жыл бұрын
@@micromikayla I'm glad you found words!! You might consider looking into therapy or getting tested .... Having the right words is/has bwen a Huge step forward for many people I know, including myself.
@beccac6812
2 жыл бұрын
I’ve never heard someone explain depression so accurately : the only thing that has ever come close for me was Inside out: just like you said: depression is an absence of happiness AND sadness: a hole in the chest where your feelings , passions, motivations once were. You’re not alone: you are actually bringing to the light what so many of us have dealt with so that we know we’re not alone.
@YogaWithBird
2 жыл бұрын
When you said anxiety hurts. I felt that 🥺😭❤️ its can be so so physically painful. you’re not alone, This was comforting and so raw. Thank you for sharing this 🙏❤️❤️
@deepika2644
2 жыл бұрын
THAT'S WHY YOU GOTTA FOLLOW SADHGURU'S WISDOM
@deepika2644
2 жыл бұрын
Hope you get well soon brother
@chic.honeyteaxo
2 жыл бұрын
exactly!!
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑....
@XxKLVSxX
2 жыл бұрын
“Part of me just wants to die sometimes, all the time” “I’ve never tried to end my life or hurt myself in any way and I’m aware that I’m not going to, so it makes me feel crazy for that percentage of me that always feels like I just don’t want to do this any more” These two sentences hit me like a tonne of bricks. I’ve felt this way for about 12 years now and I could never articulate it in a way that maybe other people might understand. Thank you. I want to be better but I find it difficult to motivate myself to do better. I feel the physical pain with depression and anxiety as well, I can handle the brain stuff but when it gets so bad it physically affects me then I find it very very difficult to handle both the brain and body stuff together. I’m glad you’re finding the light in your darkness. Thank you again for this video D ❤️
@RayahTevy
2 жыл бұрын
We are here for you D’angelo! 🙏🏽
@sushirollart3722
2 жыл бұрын
Yea
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑....
@michellemar9961
2 жыл бұрын
We love you
@leannwagler9877
Жыл бұрын
As soon as your voice started cracking and you tried to hold back your tears, my heart broke, I'm so sorry you've been dealing with this. I hope you're not alone, and also that you are well. Don't feel pressure to post. Take your time. Stay Strong.
@theftking
2 жыл бұрын
Glad you came back and made this. Good to see you again; we missed you!!!
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑..
@noxzaz1076
2 жыл бұрын
hi theft king :)
@lopeasez8821
2 жыл бұрын
Hello 👋
@SSIMS
2 жыл бұрын
Who's we I was celebrating because Dangelo is a bad person
@tojis_officialwife
2 жыл бұрын
@@SSIMS you’re just looking for attention LMAOO
@Unsureshelby
2 жыл бұрын
I was crying watching this. ‘I feel nothing and it hurts’ is the most articulate description I’ve heard about how depression feels. Hope you’re taking care of yourself 🖤
@lachimoleah
2 жыл бұрын
I agree. Hugs to you!
@DoodleDate
2 жыл бұрын
Firstly omg It's great to see you back again!! We also took a year-long break from youtube. It can become so overwhelming to create content online. Taking a huge step back and refocusing on living life for a while was a great way to re-focus on mental health! We hope you're feeling a bit better in yourself now and remember to take it easy, do what you gotta do to take care of you! There's no shame in that
@thefirstface4575
2 жыл бұрын
We 100% have the same KZitem recommended because I’ve seen your comments on 5 videos today, excellent taste, good people, very based! 💅 have a great day guys!
@jessicar5549
2 жыл бұрын
D’Angelo THANK YOU ❤️🙏 For sharing this, for opening up, for being so brave. We resonate with you, we are here for you and we LOVE you!!
@sydneywagner9847
2 жыл бұрын
The way you articulated feeling guilty about your ideation because you’ve never “done it” really resonated with me and helped put something I’ve felt for a very long time into words. Thank you for sharing this with us, and I hope that you continue on your upswing to make content that brings you joy❤️
@sylviapettigrew1408
2 жыл бұрын
As someone who is also at a point where my anxiety is getting really bad, I get it. There are some days I can’t get out of bed, much less produce any sort of content. Do whatever you need to, most of your subscribers will be waiting when you get back.
@MiraCassandre
2 жыл бұрын
Same here, a lot of us understand.
@Ech0Chamber
2 жыл бұрын
Our sympathy for others alike will go a long way to uplift those in need of this very understanding.
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑
@M.L.Shaw.
2 жыл бұрын
"I feel nothing, and it hurts." I don't know if I've ever heard a more perfect description of how the depths of depression feel.
@maherlynmorency2012
2 жыл бұрын
Apathy. Apathy is the worst and must be avoided at all costs.
@OGimouse1
2 жыл бұрын
It's the vacuum of your body trying to bring ANYTHING into being.
@mjm5565
21 күн бұрын
I'm 56, and have had catastrophic anxiety on and off all my life. I am so impressed with you for making this video and putting yourself out there like this. Normalizing mental health struggles is SO IMPORTANT, and you have a huge platform that will reach so many people. I hope things are more manageable now. Lots of internet hugs from a complete stranger, fwiw.
@1981lackadaisy
2 жыл бұрын
Hearing someone else talk about s*icidal ideation has made me feel a little bit less alone in my own internal struggle with feeling like I just can’t keep going. The whole subject is so taboo that it seems like people in general are afraid to talk about it. It feels shameful to me to admit that most days I would rather not be alive. I am afraid of how the people around me might perceive me, if they knew that the main thing running through my head at any given time is that I just want it all to stop. Thank you for talking about it. It helps to be reminded that I’m not the only one feeling things like this ❤️
@cheesecakelasagna
2 жыл бұрын
Same. Especially now that I'm in a vulnerable position and paused my meds because I currently can't afford it so the ideation is getting more and more convincing and harder to rationalize out of.
@GeorgiaGeorgette
2 жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry. I understand. Stay safe.
@GeorgiaGeorgette
2 жыл бұрын
@@cheesecakelasagna My heart goes out to you.
@Goldie9899
2 жыл бұрын
Same and many of us have these feelings…probably more then we should be!! Life is tough enough especially with the way the world is right now…add in having mental health issues…and it’s a daily struggle almost to not have these thoughts!! It’s so important for people to talk openly about all these issues, because none of us are alone, crazy and I truly feel we can all help each other! I’ve felt so much better after watching a You Tube video/creator I follow when I was having one of those days where I felt like I didn’t want to live anymore
@PartanBree
2 жыл бұрын
I hope you find a way to feel better soon, and figure out something which will answer that distress call, whatever that might be. You are very far from alone in feeling like that at times.
@CaptinBenny
2 жыл бұрын
"Depression isn't sadness. It's nothing. I feel nothing." I couldn't have said it any better. I faced my first real bout of depression (and recognized that it WAS depression) around 2016. It's been a constant battle since. But I never really understood what "being depressed" was until I was in it myself.
@non_existence_
Жыл бұрын
This was affirming to hear as another person struggling with depression and anxiety. It's crazy that I can be so productive and creative for so long but then, for any reason my anxiety can give me, to sabotage all that work, all that progress. It's hard to be a creative on the internet with a huge audience and while I admire you I do not envy that responsibility. I'm always going to be checking back to see what you've created because your work is some of the highest quality online these days and that won't leave my memory so soon. Thank you for taking care of yourself and doing what you love.
@oddestodyssey
2 жыл бұрын
as someone who has attempted and has struggled with self harm, the fact that YOU didn't do anything that i did doesn't matter. the world likes to paint this idea of anxiety and depression as all or nothing, you either have it good or you're a wreck, but its not like that at all, and nearly everyone here understands that too. we're all just happy that you're safe and alive despite the weight you've been carrying. we love you, d !!
@lenroz
2 жыл бұрын
You put it well. It's a scale, all of it. Just because you didn't struggle "as much" as someone else, doesn't mean you didn't.
@covereddonuts1279
2 жыл бұрын
Yes- I hate that people think depression isn’t so bad because you haven’t attempted or anything. That’s such a toxic way of thinking because then when you do attempt suddenly it’s like all that emptiness and fear suddenly now matter. When it always did. Those feelings are valid and not something to overlook.
@KalinTheZola
2 жыл бұрын
@@covereddonuts1279 I think some people have concerns claiming something they think they not apply to them because it doesn't fit the media presented form of that thing. There's many ways that depression expresses itself and you don't have to be planning your final day in order for it to be really negatively affecting your life. Kind of makes me think of when I finally came out as trans, I struggled accepting it because I didn't quite fit the media presented idea of how trans people realize they're trans and come out.
@cherisekwok1927
2 жыл бұрын
Nobody hurt this man like genuinely I am PRAYING the internet conducts themselves for ONCE don’t pressure him for content it’s almost a duty as human beings we have to know the proper response to a man who is opening up to us and being vulnerable on the internet. That’s the only thing we can do to help him right now and I’ll be damned if any shitty person can’t see that.
@MbitaChizi
2 жыл бұрын
Dont read my name 😑
@eldritchkitty2396
2 жыл бұрын
I don't even care if he never uploads, I just want him to be alright.
@elexis3728
2 жыл бұрын
Yes! Like puhhhleeease let the internet conduct themselves accordingly!
@gimmeyourankles
2 жыл бұрын
i'm ready to throw hands at anyone that bothers him istg
@KuncanDastner
2 жыл бұрын
i'm really proud of you for coming forward with those deep emotional parts, it takes a lot of strength to be open about that. wishing you luck and love
@tshepomaluleke2475
2 жыл бұрын
@@SSIMS 😂😂 dumb comment
@KuncanDastner
2 жыл бұрын
@@SSIMS I'm sorry to hear you didn't get anything out of it, I appreciated what he had to say
@allie7380
Жыл бұрын
This is very heartfelt and a great video anxiety can take over people’s lives it’s happened to me but I never had a social media job. And without that it still sucks but man having an audience who will notice your hiatus sounds like it would make it ten times worse. But the glow up tho
@allosch9
2 жыл бұрын
Passive suicidal ideation is so real and so valid! I have struggled with those thoughts, depression, and anxiety for most of my life. It was really powerful and comforting hearing you open up about your struggles with it, honestly (not like I'm glad you deal with it; I think you know what I mean!). Thank you ❤ and please give yourself whatever time you need. You as a human come before pleasing any of us with your videos, whatever that looks like
@Mangafrita533
2 жыл бұрын
Yes!! People who are truly strong are the ones who aren’t afraid to show others their vulnerability and it was really powerful seeing someone that I see as an inspiration opening up and talking about how not everything is always perfect and that there are good times and bad times
@MohammedAgbadi
2 жыл бұрын
omg look at you♥. this was such a relatable, warm, and heartfelt video. most of the times we feel we're all alone, anxious, and just freaking out for things that have happened or haven't happened yet, and the camera, youtube, art, become our escape to pretend we're fine when we really are not. im glad you have the courage to talk about this part of you and expose your vulnerability to others. take care of yourself brother, and know that you're never alone.
@kasey5602
2 жыл бұрын
Beautifully said
@anais559
2 жыл бұрын
TW: When you stated that you often felt like you wanted to die, I could relate to it. My depression often leads me to not necessarily wanting to die, but wanting to be in a coma; wanting to sleep forever. I told my father: "I don't know how people... live. How they go to work, take care of their children, meeting people.. I don't get it." After coming back to therapy, my face hurt, my back hurt, my neck hurt... It's exhausting and the online sphere doesn't make it better, especially for well known people. But it got a little better for me. Therapy helped. Spirituality helped. Books helped too. Friends and family helped the most. It's hard work, but it gets a little easier. Gotta do it every day, though.
@sleepyqueer
2 жыл бұрын
very much relate to that, i call it just being tired sometimes when i don’t want to scare the people around me sometimes. my heart ached when he said that because i feel it so hard, it’s such an awful feeling. i’m so glad you’ve been able to get help and support 💖💖💖
@lolk9932
Жыл бұрын
I hope he's doing well rn
@blazetechstudios
2 жыл бұрын
For me personally, you have transcended being a “KZitemr” into being a treasure. We come to watch you for YOU - not even necessarily the subject of your content. I think you’ll find success in whatever you do because we genuinely love how genuine you are. Take whatever breaks you need - we are all here for you because you mean so much to us. And we are all excited to see your new content that doesn’t weigh such a heavy toll on you. I had the same struggle starting at like age 16 until maybe a year ago with the having a Side B that constantly berated Side A. But I finally got answers and I am so much better now. I saw a neuropsychologist and she helped diagnose my issue and I am almost in a complete 180 now. If you ever want her information, I’ll hook you up.
@oddlem
2 жыл бұрын
I absolutely love how you worded that first paragraph
@nai1729
2 жыл бұрын
this!!! i love watching d’angelo cause of him, not necessarily cause the whole “bad news i commentate”, he might lose some but he will definitely also gain some!!
@juvenalgonzalezjr3420
2 жыл бұрын
Yes even just do a video you painting, or something else while just talking about anything. When you said you felt an empty spot, it's kind of what I went through for awhile. I hope this isn't crossing any lines but I looked into religion. Open mind clean slate, because anything is possible, anything. Magic is what we call it before we figure out how then we call it science. Started reading the Bible and it would help to calm down and pull the feeling out of me not me out of it. I tried reading any other book thinking well I just get into the book but that wasn't the case. We are all different what works for some may not others, I just feel that what you have to lose is what you're trying to shake off anyway. My opinion and you'll do what you do. Whatever it is you do I hope it works for you.
@JennaEmbers
2 жыл бұрын
i’ve often found that those that are self-aware are often the most cognizant of pain both inside and outside of themselves, which makes life extra painful sometimes. you are a very perceptive person, and although that’s a gift, i know that can also make life incredibly difficult. i am so sorry, you are seen.
@grace-zb5zx
2 жыл бұрын
thank you for saying that. even when i’m not in the midst of a panic attack or dissociative episode, i’m still afraid of the reality that it exists. it feels like you can’t win.
@brionykathryne6716
2 жыл бұрын
When you said the part "i just want to die most of the time" it validated what ive been going through too. Anxiety and depression go hand in hand and make eachother worse. I have depression and anxiety and i know how it feels to want to die but not want to actively kill yourself. I sometimes feel so hopeless and exhausted by existance.
@PeopleStream
Жыл бұрын
This was hard to watch, but only because I’m dealing with my own things. Love you D’Angelo.
@PeopleStream
Жыл бұрын
It all made sense
@TheVideoChatter
Жыл бұрын
I hope you’re okay ❤
@PeopleStream
Жыл бұрын
@@TheVideoChatter thank you! I am, I am just a sensitive soul
@SavingSoulsMinistries
Жыл бұрын
Jesus saved and healed my wretched soul. I am a very sensitive soul it this horrible world, He’s the only comfort I have and for that I’m grateful. He’s the truth Hallelujah
@cheese273
Жыл бұрын
@Saving Souls Ministries turning to jesus has helped me alot 🙏 ♥️
@PowerGotNow
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for making this video related to a lot of your struggles and especially about twitter affecting you. Helped me reflect about a lot keep putting your mental health first and taking care of yourself.
@hakarhatefi3270
2 жыл бұрын
Go away bro, this doesnt relate to your situation
@katieb.
2 жыл бұрын
when my anxiety gets really bad, all I can think about is the fact that I never asked to be born, but now I have the weight of my consciousness strapped to me at all times. a lot of what you described of your outlook really resonated with me. thank you for sharing your experience with us, it feels less isolating to hear echos of the hardest parts of my struggle w my own mental health from others.
@aidenroulette
Жыл бұрын
I love this. As scary as it can be to be vulnerable in front of so many people, it's a strong reminder that we're all human and we're all struggling in some way. But I seriously appreciate this admission of your struggles. I fully understand the feeling of seeing nothing but negativity everywhere and not knowing what to do or how to approach it
@RisIgrec
2 жыл бұрын
I’ve been having a very similar experience for the past several months. Just as KZitem was working out for me - a dream I’ve had since I was introduced to KZitem in its early days - it all fell apart. Thank you so much for talking about your experience with this. The notion that you don’t need permission to feel the way you do is also something I have been working on accepting. Happy to see you back and I’m wishing you success and fulfillment in your personal journey towards better mental health, whether you’re posting videos or not :)
@jasminesofela5724
2 жыл бұрын
i love your vids omg, hope you can find peace with your youtube journey though
@haileyrobins5992
2 жыл бұрын
Mental health isn’t pathetic D’Angelo. I’m glad to see you are doing better
@NatashaCrane
Жыл бұрын
I feel you hun. Depression is no joke. You can't just turn it off. I know this feeling. You're loved and not alone.
@TheCarPassionChannel
2 жыл бұрын
I'm sure I'm not alone in massively appreciating an upload like this, real human stuff needs to be online more. Love all of your videos but your health is way more important!
@Kirbybaby
2 жыл бұрын
100% feel you. Soon as anything gets hard my "lets just die" button gets triggered. And that in of itself triggers more anxiety. And sometimes it gets so tiring. Ive got the best circumstances in my whole life and still have this feeling in the back of my head. I can have a slew of good days without a trigger and then boredom itself will be the trigger. It just goes to show sometimes there really is a chemical thing going on. I never truly got the sentiment until now but Im truly happy for once in my life...while also feeling like I want to die. Its a weird dichotomy to live with. You seem to be a perfectionist like me as well and my only advice is throw that all out the window and just create. Its so easy to shit on the product but the process of creating something is the fuel you need back in your life. Dont worry about it being the best video. I didnt think Id relate so hard to the way youre feeling even the physical part. Find comfort in knowing youre not alone in the slightest
@morpho_portis
2 жыл бұрын
I know that button so well. Sometimes it's the simplest things. Sending you strength!
@Mangafrita533
2 жыл бұрын
That’s exactly how I feel, its kinda comforting to know I’m not alone. Thank you so much for your advice, I hope you get better
@valeriarossini543
2 жыл бұрын
you have no idea how much I can relate to this comment, thank you for explaining it so perfectly
@christinep4753
2 жыл бұрын
As someone who's had depression and generalized anxiety my whole life and has taken time off work because of it, I am telling you that it will get better. My mental health bottomed out between the ages of 18-23. I'm 36 now and you could not pay me enough to go back to being 23, or really my 20s at all. But it has gotten much better and I have learned to show myself the same compassion I show my friends and family, but it takes time. A lot of time. And this too shall pass. Love you D'Angelo, praying for you
@Eternalsunshinejewelry
2 жыл бұрын
Im turning 22 SOS
@Esterferreiradecastro
2 жыл бұрын
Im 24 and have been struggling since 18 too, honestly hope it gets better quicker than 30s
@Kyrator88
2 жыл бұрын
As a 24 year old just coming out of 2 years of substance abuse that does make me feel a lot better :D
@sarahok6589
2 жыл бұрын
hi, do you have instagram, looking for a friend who has advice
@stellkirkie
2 жыл бұрын
Your comment made me feel so much better, I’ve been dealing with GAD and other mental health issues since 18 and I’ll be 25 this year. I’m glad you’re doing well!
@ClassyChassiss
2 жыл бұрын
Suicidal Ideations is really tricky, and it breaks my heart to hear you talk about it because I know exactly how you feel, down to the crying because even saying it sounds so scary and alarming, even when you know you're not going to do anything, and because its not a feeling you want people to ever feel. I am so sorry you've been dealing with this, but thank you for being so open and honest and talking about it, because you're not alone here and I'm sure you're gonna see it within your audience. I am just very happy to see your face and that you're attempting to make moves in ways that feel comfortable for you!
@violetsb7000
Жыл бұрын
god i understand the burn out creatively. i get art burnout really bad and when it hits i cant art for days, weeks and *months*. but my desire to create doesnt go away, its my way of expressing myself so when i get art burnout i feel like im suffocating and all the lil art brain bugs start eating away at me. its very frustrating. as someone whos experienced anxiety and depression chronically off and on i can really relate to everything you expressed and i hope things continue to get easier to manage, you're audience will always be here and excited for when you decide to make content again. even if you decide to never make videos again, there will be people here wishing you the best :)
@XANAX-Pilled
2 жыл бұрын
I just wanna give you a big hug, man. 'm 42, and have wrestled with bipolar disorder, panic disorder, social anxiety, and OCD since the nineties. I understand every word of what you're saying, here, and much of it brought me to tears. Keep fighting for your well being, and, never forget that you're INSANELY talented, and have a LOT to offer to this painful world. I've missed you, man. All the Love in the World, Youngblood.
@phoenixgirl70
2 жыл бұрын
Hey great to see another person who writes off younger creators. As well as someone who identified with his video. Of course D’Angelo expresses things so incredibly well. I had a feeling because on one video he made a flip remark about asking people how they are and he said “Well I don’t feel like dying today” and also the connection between creativity and mental illness. And D’Angelo is so incredibly creative and intelligent in every meaning. I was really worried about him. Not out of the woods but still walking. I hope they find a treatment plan that works for him. And also yourself. It’s exhausting just being awake sometimes.Take Care.
@islamandchristianityhater5713
2 жыл бұрын
wish u r soing well sir
@minarose8723
2 жыл бұрын
People like you make me so happy and filled with joy
@nerveendings
2 жыл бұрын
I love when you said you were "confusing my responsibility of staying educated and informed with the thought I had to just know everything bad all the time" - that really resonated with me as an also anxious/depressed creative with a social conscience. Nice to see you on YT again and I'm glad you've been taking time to evaluate what you can do to mitigate the mental shit
@jesikapinkette
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for being vulnerable and honest. This video resonated with me, unfortunately. I lost my dad in 2021 and my anxiety has only become worse and louder. And.... the unaliving intrusive thoughts are there a lot more. I'm usually embarrassed and ashamed of how my anxiety made me act or the things I said when I was afraid and anxious and losing control over a situation. I leave it feeling horrible and like the world would be better without me. You are so loved and I'm so thankful that you're a random person on the internet that has put content out that I can connect with. Please keep going. I know anxiety can be so loud. I hope you always find ways to get through it. ❤
@margoalex.
2 жыл бұрын
I don’t think you’ve realized how many people you’ve helped simply by talking about this. Thank you.
@zy2thick318
2 жыл бұрын
It's crazy how someone you don't know personally can be feeling the exact way you feel. Even the feelings about creating. I'm so glad you are aware of what's going on and proactive in doing the work to feel better. We got this!💞✌🏾🙏🏾
@crazyratlady3115
24 күн бұрын
Just started watching in the last couple of weeks, I'm off work right now because my anxiety/burnout manifests as severe physical pain, and I hear what you're saying. We wouldn't say "sorry, my diabetes has been really unmanageable recently, I feel pathetic for saying that." and anxiety is the same thing. Our hormones are fucking up, sometimes there's a reason - a physical illness, a stressor, a memory that starts to overwhelm us. Sometimes, with anxiety and depression, it's because we suddenly feel safe enough to process something, and sometimes it's death by a thousand tiny cuts that have just built up to overwhelm us. Health comes first. Your body was telling you that you needed the break, and you listened. It's nice to be here 2 years later and see that you're still going, still here, still creating.
@TE-sq1xk
2 жыл бұрын
I can heavily relate to the desire to know bad things to not seem “privileged”. A lot of that came crashing down for myself in the height of BLM. I am a black person but I found myself so immersed in the pain that I had to take a step back from a lot of the things I consume. Something that helped me is reframing the desire. Know but don’t immerse yourself.
@thiccboi8963
2 жыл бұрын
Ou heavily felt on that one. I thought that during the height of the protests I had to constantly immerse myself in black pain.
@houstonwehaveagamermoment
2 жыл бұрын
I’m literally going through this rn as we speak. I always feel the need to speak out against injustice but I’m crushed by the feeling of hurting the cause I support by not being to argue with people good enough. I’m terrified that my beliefs are just things I say online and I don’t actually believe them because I can’t justify them articulately. I know that’s just my anxiety speaking and arguing online with strangers literally helps nobody but it’s basically the only outlet I have since I only have a handful of people in my life who share my beliefs. I think instead of social media the best thing for me would be to read theory and actively participate in my community so I can say I’ve made a difference
@522beatsprod.5
2 жыл бұрын
@@houstonwehaveagamermoment I understand how you feel too. I just want throw my phone away and smash it every time I see a better help ad. I'm sending air hugs.
@thefridge7335
2 жыл бұрын
What pain?
@itschristinamoon
2 жыл бұрын
Oh wow. As a non-black brown minority, I relate to immersing yourself in the pain you see in your community. What is in our control, we can try to take control of. But social media is designed to enrage you.
@annecathrine8827
2 жыл бұрын
“Negativity gets more views” is 100% true. I did a social experiment on Facebook when I got diagnosed with cancer. A massive amount of people reacted to it. And when I got the all-clear from my doctor (six months after surgery) I posted an update and almost no one reacted to it. It made me very sad. People need to care about good things too. (Anxiety is one of the symptoms of the cancer I had and my anxiety doubled in less than a month and I didn’t know what to do with myself. Cancer is a very lonely disease so I just laid in bed all day. Anxiety is horrible and I’m glad mine went away when my cancer went away.)
@aazhie
2 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry you didn't get much feedback about good news :( I'm glad you better and hope you can enjoy more social support in your life. Sadly, I think people also react to bad news and often forget to be so supportive when good news is announced as well.
@saras.5045
2 жыл бұрын
I work with a local news stations and all of our articles we post that are “negative” (deaths, car accidents, crime, etc) gets wayyyy more views than anything we post that’s positive. We have made a genuine effort to post more about positive community things but they barely get any engagement compared to the more negative stories. It’s backed by Google and Facebook analytics. Numbers don’t lie 🤷♀️
@Sigourneyporpoise
2 жыл бұрын
CONGRATS, TRULY!! on the all-clear!!
@briannenbrooks
2 жыл бұрын
Glad the cancer went away! Good luck to you!!
@Me-sb2xp
2 жыл бұрын
I'm so so glad you're doing better now Anne! Congratulations :)
@TheRealLemon94
Жыл бұрын
Hope you're doing better, dude. I'm a bit older at 28, and spent a lot of my life with the same feelings and issues. I don't say this to try to "pull seniority" or anything, but just to say I'm glad you were able to address those feelings sooner than I did. I learned my issues stem from some pretty bad ADHD, and am personally loads better since getting on medication and understanding how it relates to the rest of my mental health issues. I'm not going to try to offer advice offer or anything, because I know how different person's triggers are that deal with these struggles, and it seems like you are miles ahead in your own understanding of. I hope you continue on your journey of mental health, and appreciate you sharing your journey. It's really inspiring to me personally to see people like you having these realizations and acceptance earlier than I did.
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