I just found out last night that my young daughter has been cutting. I’m absolutely gutted. Thank you for the information in this video.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
You are so welcome, you are not alone and you can get through this. Kids do come out ok in the end with the right kind of support and help.
@shosh790
2 жыл бұрын
Me to 😭 yesterday i found out. She started a year ago and now she’s 17. The reason she told me that she hates her self when she made me angry and couldn’t satisfy me. While actually am trying my best to be a good mother not perfect.
@ronswansonsdog2833
2 жыл бұрын
Same boat here. Do any of you know of a support group for moms like us? I feel so guilty.
@irenedavo3768
Жыл бұрын
Scary
@irenedavo3768
Жыл бұрын
@@ronswansonsdog2833 hello
@shawnsaramurray9286
3 жыл бұрын
You are 100% on the ball! I was raised in a violent alcoholic home. I had mental health issues for many years, by teenage years there was so much going on in my life I couldn’t handle the pain in my heart, couldn’t handle the panic attacks.. cutting was a way to release the pain. I called it deflecting. I was always very careful, and controlled. I didn’t have the proper help for years I later turned to drugs so people couldn’t see the scars I was an addict until I was 24 when I woke up one morning and said I’m done.. Since then I’ve become a mom, finished my schooling and am now opening my own company.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Shawnsara Murray, thank you for sharing your story, very powerful.
@colinmcintyre1769
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you I'm trying to understand my segnificant other more and this comment was brave and helped me see it through her eyes especially after this great video.
@dianebaum5194
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for explaining that .
@fabricengwa5777
Жыл бұрын
Isn't this Girl Power 💖
@priyabarua5741
6 ай бұрын
Wow!! Well done! More power to you! Hope u have taken some help… dealing with kids as they grow and the challenges ahead may bring up childhood trauma
@GODisreal159
5 ай бұрын
This is so deep my teenage son does this and he's definitely has depression and I talk to him frequently, and he was a run away twice, I'm praying not just for my son but all youths that deals with this.
@nussknacker9827
19 күн бұрын
If he ran away it means someone at home is causing him severe distress. He won't get better if the cause of his suffering isn't removed
@elizabethcohenour9046
3 жыл бұрын
I completely agree. I never knew why cutting made me feel less upset. Thanks for explaining!
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Absolutely!! Did the explanation feel right to you?
@Jacky.c.v
3 жыл бұрын
I used cutting to calm down. Concentration on the physical pain helped. But of course, even professionals said it’s attention. A lot of them don’t take kids seriously .
@Starry_Night_Sky7455
3 жыл бұрын
Its the intense focus thats relief, yeah? Ok there are other ways to get that fixated concentration effect without cutting. Actually, just staring at a candle flame can do that. Its meditative. Music and something to visually fixate upon can do that too. I feel for you trying to get help. Some therapists are just crap, plain and simple.
@IvanMatvijenko
3 жыл бұрын
If you need to cut in order to calm down, then you must really low because if you were high you would fall and die! :)))) I am sure that self harm and cutting is just like any other drug a druggy uses to cure them selves of invisible most likely imagine enemy.
@bethanyprior60
3 жыл бұрын
Amen! You would think that it would be common sense! People who cut wouldn't go to such lengths to hide it, if their reason was to get attention! If only more people would be open minded to kids, instead of jumping to illogical conclusions. My heart goes out to every misunderstood individual.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
//jacky//, that is so sad to hear. We should take kids seriously when they talk. It take lots of courage to speak up.
@Jacky.c.v
3 жыл бұрын
Bonnie Hundley Yeah, but didn’t he also explain in the video, that it’s pain relief? Also a factor
@lorifriesen9692
Жыл бұрын
it is pain management. this is how i’ve explained it to the few loved ones who i talk to abt this problem. the scariest part is how addictive it feels, it feels good but with a lot of shame at the same time. the emotional pain i deal with is caused my my terrible relationship with my religious parents, who i live with. i love them and wish they could love me for who i am. they are dead set on controlling my choices in every aspect of life even tho i am an adult, the oldest child (girl) of the family. at this point everything i do ticks them off and everything they say rubs me the wrong way and there is no understanding on their part and no giving in on my part, because i feel that giving in to their wishes will not make me happier at all. it feels selfish but the constant tension and disapproval and being looked down on or judged and dismissed as “clueless” or “not making any sense” or “weak and incapable” feels worse. none of these are true for the most part and they are unaware of their gaslighting/manipulative behaviour. sometimes i do feel crazy for being upset with them until i tell anyone the stories of how they treat me and my younger siblings, and behave in general. my listeners jaws always drop and they use the words insane/crazy/unreasonable before i even do. anyway, i havent quite learned how to communicate properly yet so the built up emotional pain can only be released or relieved by hard physical work or exercise, talking about it, or… SH. it is 2 am, i have no work to do and do not want to avoid pain by causing pain, so i’m writing the longest comment on this video. congratulations to anyone who reads the whole thing and i hope you all have someone to talk to. you are so worth healing and love❤️
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
YOU are worth healing and love. I hope you really understand that. Some family counseling might be helpful for you all.
@YoungunaI3
3 жыл бұрын
I used to cut when I was emotionally triggered. The pain I felt was so intense, I didn’t know any other way to make it go away (temporarily of course). I stopped July 10, 2010 when I went too far and had to go to the hospital and get stitched up. After that, alcohol became my escape. Now I’m on the path of self discovery & actually getting to the root of the issue. It’s been great so far.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Monie Lee, I am so happy you are figuring your emotions out and finding more positive ways to deal with them. Best of luck to you.
@feltamaina4500
Жыл бұрын
Hey,am in Kenya,just found out that my 15 year old daughter has been doing this,this video has really been of great help,thank you soo much.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
You are very welcome. Glad we can connect.
@donnajocatlady3839
3 жыл бұрын
I used to still cut as an adult. It did not hurt. Seeing the blood grounded me. I finally developed appropriate coping skills and no longer do it.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Donna jo catlady, I am glad you were able to find other ways to cope, healthier ways.
@TheNewsIsLying2U
Жыл бұрын
I never heard it explained. I wasn’t even looking for this video. Just scrolling your videos and this caught my eye because I was a cutter as a teen. This makes so much sense. I had a lot of emotional pain that I didn’t know what to do with at that time. Very insightful.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Thank you, Natalie. Glad you are in a better place.
@iLeah1
3 жыл бұрын
🙌 This is spot on! I’m a former cutter. When I was 17, I felt so much emotional turmoil... the only relief I felt was when I’d cut myself. (I didn’t know who my biological father was; my mom worked a lot & was on drugs, and my twin brother was an alcoholic). I could never feel the pain of the blade crossing my skin because I felt physically numb. I only cut 5 or 6 times. Eventually, tattoos became my outlet for dealing with my internal pain. 🥰💗
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
iLeah, I am glad you figured things out.
@iLeah1
3 жыл бұрын
@@LiveOnPurposeTV I’m not even close to figuring things out! 😆 But, watching your videos have helped me immensely!!! 🙌🥰💗
@BTSarmy-zx1gc
Жыл бұрын
hi so can tatoos really be useful as an outlet ? please answer i am a victim myself
@rainyday7517
3 жыл бұрын
This makes sense to me. I sent this to a friend whose teen is very depressed and has been cutting.
@IvanMatvijenko
3 жыл бұрын
Best thing that can fullfil the void is spiritual search and practice. Tell your friend to build such habit and teen will follow. There is much joy in spiritual self discovery. This could be yoga, meditations.... church or something as simple as walk out side....
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
rainy day, I am so glad you shared. What a wonderful friend.
@sylviadalyai6046
3 жыл бұрын
I was really really tempted to cut after my third baby was born. It wasn’t because I was suicidal, it was really just an urge to release pressure. It really felt like if I just started cutting myself, I could release the pressure of having to look like a “good” mom or wife or member of my congregation. I told my husband about it and he got me going to a therapist.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Sylvia Dalyai, I am glad you spoke up and your husband listened to you. Your feelings are real and need to be dealt with.
@stefanieb7776
4 ай бұрын
Get a tattoo! ❤my one friend does whe she's feeling nimb and wants an escape. I have a few tattoos myself too :)
@ericzirk8422
Жыл бұрын
I think as parents who have cutting teens think “did I do something to hurt my kid?” But I’m also thinking that there’s hard things that happen in life, like alopecia, grandparents dying when our kids were young. My child seems more sensitive to things, like the film Old Yellar, she couldn’t watch it even as a teen. Trying to find help, but people often assume the parents are at fault.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Eric Zirk, I get what you mean, that is something that is looked at but the more diligent you are in trying to get her help the more it says about you as a parent. You are the parent your daughter needs right now.
@spacecoyote55
3 жыл бұрын
Pain management- okay. Yeah now that I'm more experienced and away from the time and events, I see that that was all it was. But I thought I was mentally broken at the time and would make a huge problem for my family if I went to them with no personal understanding of my situation or feelings. How could I expect help? Help for what? Dr Paul, your video made sense for me something that I had never understood and tried to forget was a part of my life. And now I think I know what to do if I encounter someone else who uses this method to cope. Thanks, again!
@valentinaparasidou7779
3 жыл бұрын
WOW!!! AMAZING i have experienced the same thing!!!! My cuts were hidden cause i knew i did something bad and didnt know where it was coming from!!! Thank you dr Paul
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
spacecoyote55, I love that you willing to use your experiences to help others. That is how we can make this world a better place.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
valentina parasidou, I am glad you were able to figure things out to live in a healthier way.
@dYanamatic
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you - this has helped me understand a member of the family. What a great video on a sensitive topic.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Glad it was helpful!
@camilapascual1993
3 жыл бұрын
I used to do it. And yes I agree that’s how I felt. I felt better and relived after cutting. When my parents found out they were not able to deal with it but I dealt with it later in therapy. I hope to be the parent I needed one day....
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Camila Torres, I think you are right on track.
@katherinefielder3415
3 жыл бұрын
This is so helpful. I think it could have helped me couple of years ago with a loved one. I think I kind of got there with finding support for them but it was a journey to find a level of consistent support in place that i felt was adequate. But man when you find an adequate level of support for your loved one it can make the "load" a lot lighter. It can be incredibly frustrating trying to find it though.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Katherine Fielder, It is definitely a journey. Glad you kept at it to find a solution.
@agnesekoduvere2781
Жыл бұрын
I used to harm myself as a teenager and returned occasionally to these patterns also in my 20ies. I was quite good at hiding it, usually no one ever noticed anything, I had quite good lies prepared for every injury that I had. I have had a lot of theories about why I was doing it, actually, I still have not figured it out. I wasn't in emotional pain or anything, but that urge was undeniable. Some understanding of my problem came, when quite recently I started to feel this urge again. I know all about the chemical "benefits" of cutting yourself that your brain releases, but for me it is just half the truth. The pleasure part is undeniable, but there is more to it. Now, being 40+ and having the same feeling or urge I had as a teenager, I have come to understand that this need becomes stronger when my hormones start to jump, but the root-cause is feeling unable to control my life. As weird as it is, thoughts of self harm usually are accompanied by intense and crazy sexual cravings, like sudden temporary pull towards a person with whom I don't have any relationship and sometimes those are even people I hate. Self harm creates a feeling of being empowered, being in control. I know very well about the dangers, but the temptation is so strong. Also, I have tried a lot of things in my life that in theory should help me avoid self-harm, but none of them has ever helped me feel good enough to actually stop craving pain. Maybe if I had 10 cats living with me... this craving would go away :)
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
I believe it can go away from the work I have done with those dealing with the urges.
@nira7552
25 күн бұрын
Thank you for the informative and important information ❤
@shakalaka7335
3 жыл бұрын
Yes cutting is emotional pain management. I was a stabber. I would puncture my leg because I didn’t wear shorts. And now I have a daughter who cuts. We have had a very interesting life that has had some severely traumatic experiences so I know what the source of the actions but I’m still having a hard time with accepting this.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Rhonda Larry, I hope you are getting some help for her. Usually the action will go away when the problem is addressed.
@mikeyn.y.c6543
3 жыл бұрын
And I had this cutting problem since I was a kid I felt unwanted as a kid but now I'm an adult and now it's because of depression and anxieties and a loss of a parent so now I do it to release anger and to relieve one pain for another
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Michael Salgado, I get that. The science behind cutting is very interesting. You seem to know where the hurt comes from. I hope you can work through that and create a place for it so you can move on.
@mikeyn.y.c6543
3 жыл бұрын
@@LiveOnPurposeTV thank you and I tried to find a place for the hurting but I just can't I'm lazy when it comes to getting help but I'm quick to seek for help and speak out
@NotAFighterALover16
3 жыл бұрын
After fully watching, I fully agree with all your points. I started cutting when I was 13ish. At church, when I spoke to an older teen boy about my pain he showed me his arm and said that was his method. He wasnt proud, more like he couldn't bare be alone with the shame anymore. It took over a year for my parents to notice I was cutting, and only after a concerned friend spilled the beans on me to their parent. My mother went to her room to cry and my stepfather just shook his head. I had one visit with a psychiatrist who deemed me an assault survivor. I had undiagnosed adhd and had hyper fixated on a friend who had broken off the friendship abruptly. It took 5 years to stop cutting and I still get the urge to every time I'm under stress. There are also subgroups within cutting teens and social shifts within. It's a whole different high school experience. Most people didnt even bat an eye when they realised I was, even teachers.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Taylor Modern, it is probably more common than people understand. I am glad you are able to understand where the urge is coming from when you are stressed. I hope you have a plan for what to do when that happens.
@tankmeister8131
2 жыл бұрын
My child 14, is wanting to transition Fm to Male and approaches life in an extraordinary way. Has a learning disability diagnosed around 4yrs of age
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
This is a huge topic with lots of sides to it. I don't recommend anything to change themselves while they are a minor. I hope the video is helpful if your teen is cutting.
@bethanylawyer917
2 жыл бұрын
I wish it didn't say teenagers. I started cutting in my 20's, it's not just teenagers. Adults cut to. I felt like I couldn't tell anyone because people can be so judgemental. But people had no idea I had been severally abused throughout my life. I agree with what he says, but I hope some day people realize that a lot more people then they think can struggle with this and they are just really good at hiding it.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
You bring up some good points, thank you for sharing.
@jemimahkwakuyi7879
3 жыл бұрын
Finally someone who understands me.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Jemimah Kwakuyi, there are others out there also. Glad we can connect.
@SarynMarsocci
2 ай бұрын
Fr
@NotAFighterALover16
3 жыл бұрын
As a former teen cutter, I will be very interested to see what you have to say. I shall reply when I've watched the whole video
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Taylor Morden, watch away, I am interested.
@LovelyLadyL
2 ай бұрын
Please respond. As a concerned mother of my 16yr old daughter I am looking for real answers from someone who has experiential knowledge.. if it’s not too painful please share;How did you heal ❤️🩹
@xpozybtw8216
2 жыл бұрын
My gf has been doing this and I didn’t know this until I had to figure it out and I asked her and I really didn’t know what it was for or what this meant and thank you for this video I was able to give my support and help her out and I appreciate it
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
I am glad you are there for her.
@ryersonrowe
3 жыл бұрын
If only my parents could see this
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Razor Blade, maybe it could be playing in the background when they are around and you just happen to leave the tablet or computer there?
@evanderg.265
Ай бұрын
My dad yelled at me for like 10 minutes when he saw my scars and threatened to send me to the mental hospital. I don't really talk to him about that stuff anymore🤷♂️
@rogeliogarcia1471
23 күн бұрын
Hey I have a question, my niece started cutting herself and I dint know how to start a conversation with her because she shut herself, what do you recommend, cutting seems so foreing to me, please help me!!!
@evanderg.265
22 күн бұрын
@@rogeliogarcia1471 the best thing i can say is don't yell, be gentle approach it like "hey kid is there something going on?" Type of thing, make sure to leave it open and ease into anything heavy
@rogeliogarcia1471
20 күн бұрын
@@evanderg.265 thank you!
@TributeMack2015AngrierMack
Жыл бұрын
I’m a cutter I cut so much I ended up in the hospital with 10 days for Sh it’s so addictive for me I use a soda tap to cut my arms up badly.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
There are other ways. I hope you find something that works for you soon.
@mallakaliraqia4738
Жыл бұрын
I just found out my 15 years old doing that i need help with how to deal with it i try talking to him he was silent didn't say anything 😢
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
It will probably take some professional help.
@cogeefields4118
3 жыл бұрын
When I had so many emotions going haywire all at once, mostly depression or intense feelings of abandonment, cutting was a way to relieve that anguish and feel as though I was taking control of the pain. When people look at the scars I have and they don't see horrifying Frankenstein style looking scars, they say "I thought people that cut try to hurt themselves so badly that they might bleed out and die. Why don't yours look like that?". I tell them that it was never about hurting myself, it was about trying to feel something good again. Before I was educated, I had no knowledge of the chemical release that occurs, and that I was in fact making myself "feel better". Being in control of that emotional pain through cutting was somewhat known to me but I didn't understand it in a healthy way like I do now. In the moment, all I knew was that I wanted to be numb so that I didn't have to "feel" my emotions. The only way to achieve that was through causing pain that I had "control" over because that was all I could control to shut off the nuclear reactor of emotions taking over my soul, body, and mind.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Cogee Fields, very well said, glad you are understanding your emotions. Our lives are a journey.
@rachelnise2473
3 жыл бұрын
Yes, I agree. It's about management. I used to cut myself. I think self harm started when I wanted to hit some kids that bullied me but I hit myself instead. Similar to when people are frustrated and punch a wall. I got out some aggression, got less damage than if I had gotten into a fight, no one knew anything, no fuss. A typical situation for cutting was if I had to give a talk infront of the class. Then later it was a need to get rid of something. I was bulimic a year which was the same thing. I wasn't fat, I didn't have any issues with my weight, just needed to get rid of something, the same as a small cut and letting blood pump out of my arm. I got older, got more control over my surroundings, see things differently so it's not me any more. There was a homeless guy I used to talk to. He did it very differently to me. I sterilised the razor blade, small hidden precis cuts. He would smash a bottle in the street and make big messy cuts. He said it got him a hospital bed for the night. I wasn't convinced that was the main reason, but maybe I was just projecting my own experience.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Rachel Nise, thank you for sharing. Glad you have found other ways to deal with your emotions.
@ShushLorraine
3 жыл бұрын
I'm so glad to see this. It makes perfect sense. Now I know what to do if I come across this.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Sharon Smith, so glad you are educating yourself. You will be in a position to help someone in the future.
@katherinelydon7306
3 жыл бұрын
I can relate and you are right on. For the person I know it was psychological/emotional. We did engage a therapist.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Katherine Lydon, glad they are getting help.
@jaicee64
3 жыл бұрын
My daughter is a cutter. It's definitely a struggle .
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
jaicee64, I am sorry. I wish your family the best and hope she can get to the root of her pain.
@givethanksandpraisealways
3 жыл бұрын
1000% psychological...at a young age tht3 was a form of release. Yes, release...the release felt when your skin breaks and blood comes out for me it released what was going on mentally. Mentally i was being bullied at school, had been sexually assaulted by my cousin at a young age, dealing with entire family who turned it on all on me and as result of my cosuin my entire family questioned everything i did...so lived on eggshells. No longer does it affect me I'm 34 and have a beautiful family. I do however recognize that when i get triggered and the pain in deep those memories come back to me. Also, I am a chronic pain patient as i had back surgery at 21yrs and now have fibromyalgia and severe nerve damage everywhere i get spasms that take out my legs... But i would deal with physical pain all day and not the psychological. Heal your innerself, learn your triggers and work through them in a healthy way. As human its okay to make mistakes and relapse but for yourself and gift of life keep trying you will reach the end of the rainbow💜💗🦄🦋🧚♀️🧚♂️
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing your story, Chestnut2013 P.
@amandavanwyk2964
3 жыл бұрын
Wonderfull video. Thank you.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Glad you enjoyed it!
@rm_hobi_rules6915
3 жыл бұрын
My niece cuts herself she hides the cuts from my mom who is raised her but on social media she posts pics of her cuts like it's cool. She only talks and hangs out with people like that too. What makes me believe there's something wrong mentally with her is that when she gets cut from tripping and bleeds a little drop of blood she'll scream so loud like she's dying. She's 17yrs old and throws tantrums, screams loudly she's even hurt my ears from her screams and hurts animals. My mom takes her to therapy but they hide things from the therapist plus my mom is also not right. She is worse than my niece and does things I can't tell on here. I don't want my children around them I don't know how to tell them I want nothing to do them anymore. Unfortunately I live next door to them and it's not just my mom and niece but my sister as well. They suffer from mental illness and I need to get my kids far away from them all. I can't move because I can't afford it. I don't know what to do 😔
@JannyMaha
3 жыл бұрын
Sending you warm hugs, dear.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
rm_hobi_ rules, could you ask for a "break"? Some time to figure things out? What would it take for you to move? Start planning now. It may not be next month or in 6 months, but if there is a plan, you can act on it.
@michiganwoodsman2199
2 жыл бұрын
Help!What about the 17 year old girl who did this for the first time and mom and I absolutely sobbed for hours with her. Perfectly normal life. Better than normal! Perfect house, car and home life. And she’s loved to death. Guys where did i go wrong?
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
The Woodsman, you didn't go wrong. Your children make choices and you will do what needs to happen to get her the help she needs. This isn't forever.
@enriquerosales3497
3 ай бұрын
Thank you so much for this incredible video! Greettings from El Salvador!!
@RALPHD57
2 жыл бұрын
Great info here!! Thanks!
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
My pleasure.
@briarsutton5553
Жыл бұрын
When you talk to them......they scream at you and all's their worried about what their going through.....not caring that you've fallen into a million pieces
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Teens are normally focused inward. They have a hard time taking into account another person's feelings. Hang in there. It gets better.
@briarsutton5553
Жыл бұрын
Parents or friends can't understand how alone you feel. Confusing thoughts, self hatred. When you try to talk with parents or friends. They can or won't try to understand......instead they insult you and blame you for all that's going wrong. Parents never take their part in the mix.
@jandejager7673
9 ай бұрын
I want to plant the seeds of self love and self acceptance in my daughter.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
9 ай бұрын
Those are good seeds.
@skymarbeya561
3 жыл бұрын
For me I feel like crying isn't enough I forget fast about the pain or why I was crying . If I cut myself it's because I want to see and feel each time I touch it and remind me of why I did it and how much it hurts me physically so I imagine my heart
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Sky Zelarom, there are some powerful feelings going on here. If you could deal with what is behind the pain, would you still feel the need to cut? Probably not. I hope you find a healthier way.
@stefanieb7776
4 ай бұрын
My kids, daughter 14 today! And my son who is 12, we have always been so close and talk about everything and nothing atvthe same time. Open book and honesty and apologizing when wrong. Coslept till they were 6 and 7 mainly because wed pass out reading or chatting. My daghter cuts and i askd her in a loving way if she ever wants to talk to a professional or myself im here and she said i know and i said u wanna talk about it? She said she did it because her socially anxious and then turned into addicting and liked the feeling. Ive reachd out to her doc abd we re rolling in the right direction but it could be addicting who knew ?
@maritzacuenca4760
6 ай бұрын
Thank you 🙏
@LiveOnPurposeTV
6 ай бұрын
You are welcome.
@robbieallan6522
Жыл бұрын
I do know how it goes and pain management is probably the best way you could put it generally, myself it was psychological and seeing and feeling Injury helps deal with it until other more healthy coping methods get used. Parents please don't go straight to panic it's more often than not passes b4 medicines are needed. But as this guy said it's Still very dangerous and I guess Information like this and addressing it mildly can work.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing your experience and giving hope to some parents who may not know how to deal with the situation.
@worldwideslinger
Жыл бұрын
We just learned our 14 year old niece has been cutting for over a year now. Recently she has been staying with my wife and I and last week I took her on a hike. During the hike, while we were on a break. I casually asked her about it. She said it had to do with stress. I simply apologized for her feeling that way and needed to cut herself to feel better. I followed up that if she ever has any stress or problems that she can always come to me and I will listen without judgement 24/7, 365. I'm wondering if I should follow up with any more discussion or inquiries?
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
If you have more to say you can let her know you have some ideas and if she wants to hear from you to let you know. That gives her some power over the situation.
@irenedavo3768
Жыл бұрын
Thank you
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
You're welcome
@mikeyn.y.c6543
3 жыл бұрын
My name is Michael salgado and I'm 40and I have a cutting problem.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Thanks for sharing, Michael. This is something that can be helped with counseling. There are skills you can learn to cope.
@AmaraCamara-gx8lf
4 ай бұрын
Last night I found my teenage daughter scratched her hands after having an argument with me and I'm shocked to see her in this way. She is very depressed. Help us to make her feel better and avoid this situation
@chirondawn2966
10 ай бұрын
I was a cutter as a teen and this morning I had a minor arguement with my teenager and caught her cutting. I know why I did it and I was able to show her my scars and that I understand but I let her tell me why she does it and I had no idea she was feeling and thinking what she has been for a while now. I want to help her and I want to understand and I can not tell her dad because he is part of the problem with his need for control and perfection and high expectations of the kids. I want to be helpful not hurtful so im here to find out how to help her and make it about her
@LiveOnPurposeTV
10 ай бұрын
Thank you for being there for her.
@Zografismeni
3 ай бұрын
Personally, the reason I cut it is for believing the fact that I'm in pain. Because after I heard many times that "oh come on you're fine" I started to doubt myself.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 ай бұрын
We are sorry to hear about your pain. Live On Purpose offers a free 30-minute coaching and get acquainted session. Here is the calendar: calendly.com/liveonpurpose-team/free
@gogoli558
Жыл бұрын
wen you do its feel so good
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
That is why teens do it. We want them to deal with their feelings and learn other ways to manage their feelings.
@MorainalorettB
Жыл бұрын
I was bullied as a teen I. Turned to narcotics and alcohol many years ago, it was a way to heal but I never cut, I was bullied to the point I was on the verge of suicide , but didn't commit the act , I know how teens feel now that I'm 36 I tries to be a positive influence yes I'm African and native American I had a hard life growing up .
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for sharing your support of others who have been bullied. We need more positive influencers like you and welcome you to the channel.
@MorainalorettB
Жыл бұрын
@@LiveOnPurposeTV ur welcome
@ملتقىدجلةوالفرات
2 жыл бұрын
I knew a person who used to cut himself always when the other significant person was about to leave the relationship... Is this in the same category?
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
It could be about control. Cutting usually happens for other reasons.
@_souldier
3 жыл бұрын
maybe because are parents contuine to ignore our problems they made.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
That could be a factor, they are individual to the person.
@ericzirk8422
Жыл бұрын
Does skin picking, hair pulling also fall into this category? If a parent has these symptoms is it more likely the children will have them?
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Traits can be learned as they are observed. I haven't done any research into the likelihood that children will have the same traits.
@Wrathterrible
Жыл бұрын
I think nothing can stop my cutting. Every human on this planet hates me se i made myself to hate my self. Good for those who dont have started cutting.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
Not everyone hates you. Time to reframe some of your thoughts to serve you better,
@Wrathterrible
Жыл бұрын
@@LiveOnPurposeTV i had hard youth and bad things controll me so i cant do anything
@bobhaas6941
Жыл бұрын
Darkness, why not live so people won't hate you. Live your life doing things to help others. Identify how bad things control you and make a plan to stop letting them control you. And if you need help dealing with the bad things, then find help and support. Every day do something towards being a better person. One day you'll get there. You'll look in the mirror and like the person you see. 🙏🙏🙏 for you
@shereceamandahuddlin4587
2 жыл бұрын
Yes as of lately my 15yr old daughter keeps cutting her hand with razer or a knife and when asked why she does it she says she doesn't know
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
She needs to talk to someone. She isn't hiding it, this is a cry for help
@aldomandovani
3 жыл бұрын
Why we didn't done it but now is like a trend?
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Aldo, it has always been there. I haven't checked to see if there is an uptick, but this is not new.
@jandejager7673
9 ай бұрын
It is a disturbing phenomenon. But as parent and being pationate about Psychology understanding first and foremost. ( But you would class it as a pathology of emotion? )
@LiveOnPurposeTV
9 ай бұрын
It is not knowing any other way of dealing with the hurt they feel.
@kevinjackson1043
2 жыл бұрын
90% of what your saying is true and if gone unattended it can go away but it can want to come back in adult years somewhere
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
Kevin Jackson, our mental health is the same as our physical health, we need to pay attention to it all the time. We aren't "Cured", it is a life-long journey.
@r4hulrosh4n
2 жыл бұрын
my sister is doing this too i don't know know why is she doing this. this makes me angry she don't listen to me i don't know what i can do for her. my mother thinks she is doing this for for her boyfriend.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
Rahul Roshan, I hope you can be a support to her. She is hurting and this is how she is dealing with the hurt.
@gaming4K
3 жыл бұрын
1 min.. i only did it once when i was a bit drunk 🥴🍺 and my brother said i should ignore my "friend" because he is not a good friend but huhh what you do when you have no friends and you are an antosocial piece of "paper"? XD Also i had some love issues where the girl didn't want me. If i wanted to be suicidal i would have been cutting it the ather way because that kills.. Now i live "happily" With no friends no girlfriend lol this is a pretty unbalanced lifestyle too but at least i am not feeling too bad. 😅 anyways that cut was pretty much nothing but i felt a relief and also fear because i didn't want to do it so deep to make it a problem... 😅
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Madward YT, I hope you are able to find people you can interact with. Pick positive people who support others.
@Charlie-tc7xk
2 жыл бұрын
My parents found out last night I had so much anxiety I was shaking. They didn't lash out or lecture me. when they asked why I did it I told them I didn't know. I do know, it's just alot of diffrent factors. I don't know if they would even understand. Its so werid rn, I hope they don't treat me differently .. where should I go from here? I know I need help to stop but I don't think they know or understand that.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
Charlie, ask your parents to help you find a psychologist to talk to. Your parents can support you, but probably aren't equipped to help you through this.
@Charlie-tc7xk
2 жыл бұрын
@@LiveOnPurposeTV thank you, I will try.
@kimmysamaroo2312
3 жыл бұрын
When i was young i used cutting as a way to hide my pain and fears . I never told anyone about my problems and why i used to cut myself but in my point of view , the way that i saw cutting my body was ; when i cut myself all my pain would just flow right through as i bled and then i would just sit there and just calm down . Thats how i dealt with it .
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Kimmy Samaroo, thank you for sharing this, it may be very helpful for others seeking to understand more about why people choose to do this. It sounds like you have figured out other ways to deal with the pain now.
@kimmysamaroo2312
3 жыл бұрын
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Yes i have figured out other ways to deal with my pain and I'm glad to hear that i could help someone by just sharing how i dealt with it .
@BTSarmy-zx1gc
Жыл бұрын
hi
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
BTS army, hello.
@trollingtv7132
9 ай бұрын
They feel invisible they want some one to save them
@LiveOnPurposeTV
9 ай бұрын
They want to feel. Luckily it can be overcome with therapy.
@IvanMatvijenko
3 жыл бұрын
This guys talks about self harming in such way as its not a big deal.... it is its a problem that leads to bigger problems down the end and eventually suicidal behavior. Everyone is different, if you are dealing with someone that engages in self harm and want to help i hope youtube is not your source because knowing the person is the best source. 1. Nothing wrong with strong reaction = building stronger character 2. If you have limited resources guilt and forgiveness is great for raising self awareness! 3. Communication is the only part I would agree with, humans need tons and tons of communication and depending of temperament of individual it may not alway be verbal!
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Ivan Matviejenko, thank you for commenting.
@bethanyprior60
3 жыл бұрын
Yes! The same teenager that's crying for mom to put a bandaid on their papercut, is hiding a selfinflicted infected gash!!
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Bethany Prior, I hope they get some help.
@emmacugini8904
3 жыл бұрын
I do it for a sense of control ik not good
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Yes, that fits, Emma Cugini. When you are ready for help, I hope you reach out.
@Ritaaw1
3 жыл бұрын
If cutting is not self harm, then what is?
@givethanksandpraisealways
3 жыл бұрын
Self harm is also eating, drinking, shopping, smoking...anything done as result of any form of pain is statement of "help me, i dont know how to ask, guide me"
@rachelnise2473
3 жыл бұрын
I think he means that we don't do it for the point of self harm. As in we don't think 'I want myself to be harmed'. Like painkillers can give side affects, people don't take them coz they want liver damage or whatever, they want their broken leg to stop hurting.
@IvanMatvijenko
3 жыл бұрын
@@givethanksandpraisealways to an extent, asking for help should never be viewed as inflicting self harm, asking for help is the opposite in fact its an act of looking for self benefit!
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Reetuuw T, it is self-harm, but it isn't seen as self-harm by the person who is doing it. They are getting something from it, a release from other pain. If we want to help someone who does this, it doesn't help to label it as self-harm. We need to get to the root of the pain.
@patrickbennett439
2 жыл бұрын
Ok ive gone through a lot of emotional crap before and it wasnt like i got the bright idea of cutting myself. This whole cutting thing makes no sense to me. Well, i do something else, workout hard as F. Cause pain like that if you have to. At least youl be building yourself up. Yep, its just you and the gym, everyone else ceases to matter as you rise up above them all, in all ways. Health, muscle, lifespan, looks, strength. Out eat em, out lift em, out smoke em. Only smoke the health plant. lol. Youl be aight. 😉
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
Thank you for watching.
@EVANDANE777
Жыл бұрын
To be honest I cut people I have a weird love for sharp pain as well as scarring to feel like it as a tattoo as well as feeling emasculated by it. I now it’s wrong but yes it makes me feel powerful and strong when I do it. As dumb as it sounds that’s how it is for me.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
3VAN, I wish you well. When you are ready there are things you can do to figure out how to deal with the emotional pain.
@gkarenstratton
3 жыл бұрын
Yes. But also self-hate. As in a beloved but critical mother and father who tells you you were an accident... No WONDER he never talked to me. (BTW I didn't go thru with cutting (chicken!) but came close, as with swallowing a bottle of pills. Only reason I didn't was that abandoning husband would get the precious boys. Did wreck my life morally, but then, at age 42, GOD convinced me HE DOES love me. And wanted to forgive me, forever!, and have a relationship with me! Saved me. I became born again which Jesus/GOD said I must be. John 3 • We CAN KNOW we have eternal life. 1Jihn 5:13 • Not by going to church or baptism or "being good." (NOBODY is good enough. •THIS •Romans 3:23 •Romans 6:23 • Romans 5:8, John 3:16 • Romans 10:9,10
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Gerri WithAnI, glad you found that you are lovable and loved.
@Jen-sk8fe
2 жыл бұрын
It’s not just teens
@LiveOnPurposeTV
2 жыл бұрын
JenL6778, you are right. That is when I get approached the most, by parents.
@AnnieO100
Жыл бұрын
The tattoo craze is akin to this.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
Жыл бұрын
They are pretty different. Some people are addicted to tattoos.
@BTSarmy-zx1gc
Жыл бұрын
can tatoos really help as an outlet to this
@jandejager7673
9 ай бұрын
Do you think you would encounter it in clients with Anorexia nervosa as well?
@LiveOnPurposeTV
9 ай бұрын
There is cross-over.
@trinitybaptistchurch1888
6 ай бұрын
This is the best video on this subject that I have seen. Excellent. Thank you.
@LiveOnPurposeTV
6 ай бұрын
You are welcome. It is a topic that I feel passionately about. We can help teens to find healthier habits.
@geloballs7142
3 жыл бұрын
ik yall depressed that sucks i hope yall good but man i just wanted to be a titan shifter like eren jaeger😔
@LiveOnPurposeTV
3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for watching.
@LovelyLadyL
2 ай бұрын
Thank You 🙏🏽 My 16yr old daughter is cutting. I am reaching out to find answers & a loving, supportive community of those who understand ❤️🩹 Together we can all heal through the pain
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