“It doesn’t matter who threw you away.
It doesn’t matter where you live.
It doesn’t matter how you were treated in the past.
You are worthy of getting through this.” -Amanda Richer
Music written and performed by me.
I heard these words spoken by a very special person named Amanda Richer, from an interview taken when she was unhoused and living under a bridge. She was talking about how she keeps going, what she tells herself, when things are incredibly challenging. The entire video is a heartbreaking and powerful testament to the experience and trauma of being unhoused.
Even though living with disabling “invisible” constant genital pain is completely different than her experience, her words had a huge impact on me. I hold it together emotionally through all kinds of ordeals related to my health, but for some reason her words broke a dam and I just started sobbing.
I have felt so low, including completely hopeless and worthless, through my health ordeal. I have been fortunate enough to have a roof over my head and many other survival necessities. I can even count many blessings, yet compared to the lives of friends and peers, of healthy people my age, I often feel ashamed of where I am in my life as a result of living with pain and disability. And I have been thrown away by people who I thought cared about me, and it has really broken my spirit. I’ve been treated poorly by friends, family, and of course, the medical establishment- simply for being in pain, especially in this stigmatized part of the body.
So these words meant something to me and I found myself repeating them over and over again, like a mantra. They formed a melody in my head, and harmonizing it brought me a lot of joy. I hope Mantra, this musical arrangement of Amanda’s words, also reminds you that YOU are WORTHY…of love, care and worthy of getting through this.
Amanda's youtube channel:
/ @amandaricher
The video interview by Invisible People:
• Living under a Bridge ...
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