noisepuppet Thank you! I love those kind of videos and you got a sub from me within the first 3 seconds of this video which not too many can do!
@adriandumay4501
4 жыл бұрын
I was just about to ask the same thing.
@Necoarcchaos205
4 жыл бұрын
Ok
@Fnidner
4 жыл бұрын
anyone has a link to the past?
@jjjjjjjjjj9402
4 жыл бұрын
"It would be nice to look at consumer's balls" Home run in the first three seconds.
@Kintsugi23
4 жыл бұрын
Our sexy customers want traditional suq coqs.
@jjjjjjjjjj9402
4 жыл бұрын
@@Kintsugi23 they're looking for riots
@SmaMan
4 жыл бұрын
"I'm not interested in your concern. However, you have a hot ass, and we can tap that."
@aplimsollpunk2738
4 жыл бұрын
"The scrotal beverage company" did it for me!
@dimitriwarchief301
4 жыл бұрын
I know
@quantumblauthor7300
4 жыл бұрын
I love how the sex jokes occasionally trip and fall down the stairs, turning into complete gibberish mid-gag
@artoodiitoo
2 жыл бұрын
"but sex will mean extra profits"
@Maldoror2112
2 жыл бұрын
@@artoodiitoo And why wouldn't it?!
@kenetickups6146
Жыл бұрын
“Try again”
@doublequin
Жыл бұрын
Perfect analysis.....it IS an auditory "trip and fall down the stairs" Noisepuppet's masterpiece.
@noisepuppet
26 күн бұрын
@@quantumblauthor7300 listening back to lots of my stuff, I remember parts where I specifically intended to set up a certain expectation or pattern and then annihilate it before it could fully develop. This way, the pattern or expected payoff or whatever did exist, but only in the participant's mind, not "out there" in the world for them to receive. Basically it's a way of playing with the idea that, as audience, we don't just recognize structure. We're building it, all the time. Also I feel a little zing of funny whenever it's like "knock knock. Who's there? Naan falafel drgxclkl." 😆
@ChrisKogos
2 жыл бұрын
"As total sus cucks we can help customers wreck the whole fuckin' company"
@JetFalcon710
Жыл бұрын
3:24
@ianmichalski7997
Жыл бұрын
Nice joke from the bitch bin.
@EliBrody
7 ай бұрын
"I'm not interested in your concern" is the shining nugget of corporate reality we continue to consent to, increasingly more often
@JackPoppy
4 жыл бұрын
"Okay, you've convinced me. You can put your Crystal Pepsi display up your Crystal Pepsi ass." Holy shit, that got me bad.
@DeadShoes
9 ай бұрын
I came back just because of that line.
@EliBrody
7 ай бұрын
they found crystal pepsi up my ass
@Nikolapoleon
3 ай бұрын
@@DeadShoes I came just because of that line.
@UnfittingCarbon
4 жыл бұрын
When I worked at a 7/11 back in the day, we ordered cripple piss to sell in our store once. Unfortunately, we had to stop carrying it because it attracted rats and customers who were looking for riots :(
@E7FiretrUCK
4 жыл бұрын
UnfittingCarbon Fuck dude, that sucks. I’m sorry
@penatio
4 жыл бұрын
f
@sprtsfanatic1
4 жыл бұрын
Did you also have to deal with consumers vomiting the Cripple Piss back into the container and then repeating the process?
@CaptainFoufeu
4 жыл бұрын
My vote for best comment on the thread! Experience knows best!
@UnfittingCarbon
4 жыл бұрын
@@sprtsfanatic1 I never saw that, but they were certainly unconscious consumers.
@garysimcox345
4 жыл бұрын
“There’s never been a product quite like cripple piss” LMAO
@wendigockel
4 жыл бұрын
Gary Simcox "A hoh sis!"
@Jeremy.Bearemy
4 жыл бұрын
Pistol Crapsy is a cola
@samtinkle9076
4 жыл бұрын
“A completely different kind of soft drink, because Pystol Crepsi is a cola, with a cola flavor, for a clear cola.”
@TAKARAKURIKARA
4 жыл бұрын
What about bepis😐❓
@thecianinator
4 жыл бұрын
As the scrotal beverage company
@AWSOMEPOSSUM16
4 жыл бұрын
Scrotal beverages sure do hit the spops
@Wavemaninawe
4 жыл бұрын
Heavy testes is a whole new beverege experience.
@Circuitssmith
4 жыл бұрын
Goes great with jizz sandwiches.
@wethotsoup6279
4 жыл бұрын
Scrotal beverages are moam are maom are the best soos
@saxongreen78
4 жыл бұрын
'If they're grabbing a cum sandwich, they're going to want some cum to drink...'
@theduxabides9274
4 жыл бұрын
3:06 "We've captured Tunis" Smart of the Hapsburgs to secure that Pepsi sponsorship!
@noisepuppet
4 жыл бұрын
James Grimes ah yes, the intellect refined by generations of inbreeding
@Aethelos
4 жыл бұрын
"I am the Emperor and I want dumplings!"
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
_I’m not interested in your concern, however you’ve got a hot ass, and we can tap that_
@djk1288
2 жыл бұрын
Not to mention they did it without cutting into sales of the Core Four, _or_ the Sore Chore, _OR_ the Roar.
@theduxabides9274
2 жыл бұрын
@@djk1288 Now they can shove their Crystal Pepsi sign up the Ottoman Empire's Crystal Pepsi ass
@hallaburger
Жыл бұрын
"AND it's a product that says, 'fuck off, man'" boy if i related to anything harder i'd get picked up for public indecency
@djk1288
2 ай бұрын
And "Sales".
@coten
4 жыл бұрын
the sheer number of different ways to remix "crystal pepsi" in this poop is incredible
@vallisdaemonumofficial
4 жыл бұрын
♿🚽 *= Cripple Piss*
@wethotsoup6279
4 жыл бұрын
Cripple piss=♿🚽
@KingLich451
4 жыл бұрын
pistol crepsi
@jewelyJewels
4 жыл бұрын
Crystal pp
@jewelyJewels
4 жыл бұрын
Pestilent Pepsi
@Wavemaninawe
4 жыл бұрын
"Its crispy piss, and the meme is tight. Wow! Theres never been a product quite like Crippin' Piss. A hOh sIs. A different type of soft drink. Because Pistol Grips is a cola."
@samtinkle9076
4 жыл бұрын
*Pistol Grepsi
@LunarDelta
4 жыл бұрын
*Cripple piss
@vallisdaemonumofficial
4 жыл бұрын
♿🚽♿🚽♿🚽♿🚽♿🚽 *C R I P P L E P I S S* 🚽♿🚽♿🚽♿🚽♿🚽♿
@jeffcarroll1990shock
4 жыл бұрын
Cyst peppers
@TAKARAKURIKARA
4 жыл бұрын
@@vallisdaemonumofficial lmfaooooooo
@____NOVA____
4 жыл бұрын
*Pisstol Crapsy brought to you by the Scrotal Beverage company.* 🙏
@theprinceoffreshair
4 жыл бұрын
Jesus bless this person in your name, amen. Show her your grace father.
@chumbert5
4 жыл бұрын
The sentence mixing here is top-notch. One of the best YTPs in a long time
@brianboden6957
4 жыл бұрын
0:47 there's never been a product quite like CRIPPEN PISS
@deweywsu
4 жыл бұрын
Noisepuppet is the best YTPer on the net, bar none, because of the brilliance of his reconstructions. It's not just random blabbering., but intelligent and humorous.
@zaczac5281
3 жыл бұрын
" there's never been a product like Cripal Piss " *breaks out into laughter*
@zaczac5281
3 жыл бұрын
" Because Pipal Crepsi "
@SkylabBeats
3 жыл бұрын
@@brianboden6957 *cripple piss
@DeSinc
4 жыл бұрын
two for two man these are gold. I was already laughing so hard at cripple piss that pistol crepsy sent me through the wall
@derprofessor7027
4 жыл бұрын
@DeSinc a man of culture. Love your videos :)
@okay8632
4 жыл бұрын
oh, freeman, i see you made it
@1waffleiron
3 жыл бұрын
Speedrun fastest find two favorite two youtubers in one comment section
@pelinalwhitestrake7352
3 жыл бұрын
Pystal Crepsi has killed me twice.
@SeannaRose
2 жыл бұрын
Crystal cat piss too 🤣
@noisepuppet
4 жыл бұрын
Y'all's comments always make my week.
@84jesterx
4 жыл бұрын
Comment
@noisepuppet
4 жыл бұрын
*delighted squeal*
@jeffcarroll1990shock
4 жыл бұрын
Noisepuppet please look up ShowBiz Pizza training tapes. It would make some great material.
@noisepuppet
4 жыл бұрын
Jeff Carroll I looked up the installation videos. They're certainly spooky on their own. Problem is they're pretty slow moving, and the fidelity may be too low even for me. Uncle klunk's actual act might make a good subject though. Thanks for the rec either way.
@jeffcarroll1990shock
4 жыл бұрын
noisepuppet thank you so much for answering. I think that you can make a video about it because you're honest with that good.
@RWSCOTT
4 жыл бұрын
"we can't sell it. everybody hates it."
@matthewjensen9550
4 жыл бұрын
Robert Scott that had me dead😂😂
@Nikolapoleon
4 жыл бұрын
"I don't think anybody was really ready for the vomit storm."
@Maldoror2112
4 жыл бұрын
Profits, profits, profits, profits, profits-- something Crystal Pepsi never made.
@thecianinator
4 жыл бұрын
Well Crystal is the dentist, and everyone hates the dentist, so it makes sense that it would be a hard sell. What you need to focus on is profits.
@shaunj66
2 жыл бұрын
2:34 timestamp
@jirden
4 жыл бұрын
I feel like I win the lottery when your notifications pop up
@jamesgilboy9302
8 ай бұрын
"we've captured Tunis" is subtly gold. this is absolutely one of my top YTPs ever, I keep coming back to it
@ShaneT5S
4 жыл бұрын
"I'll go along with the thing about the Sex Barrel" "Space is cold" That's my favorite conversation piece ever 6:01
@thomaspassegger873
4 жыл бұрын
FromShanePR day the lul crowd usually comes in grabs a jizz sandwich and they’re on they’re way
@redacted4572
4 жыл бұрын
Oblivion conversations in a nutshell
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
Crystal will carbonate your carbonated carbon
@bluevanga30
4 жыл бұрын
"You have a huge asz and we can tap that" *nods
@oktayyildirim2911
2 жыл бұрын
@@thomaspassegger873 *their
@maxpitchkites
4 жыл бұрын
I'm having flashbacks to the "It's not a drink...it's more like a drink" joke in The Fesh Pince of Blair. hoh sis.
@TheGreatsagegoku
4 жыл бұрын
Drink 5 hour energy 5 h o u r e n e r g y F[F]I[I]V[V]E[E] H[H]O[O]U[U]R[R] E[E]N[N]E[E]R[R]G[G]Y[Y]
@ImpendingRiot83
4 жыл бұрын
Drink D R I N K *_D R I N K_*
@woolfy02
4 жыл бұрын
Don't forget the SAUS...
@Gl1tch_Gremlin617
4 жыл бұрын
UnseenBBQ you have to do the joj right with five hour energy. Five hours of energy now, no energy later.
@dannyg1812
4 жыл бұрын
ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ʸᵒᵘ ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ᵐᵉ ᵃ ˢᵃⁿᵈʷⁱᶜʰ?
@djk1288
4 жыл бұрын
"I think the idea that it's not a drink makes it seem like it's a drink." 5 Hour Energy, is that you?
@suhbastian
4 жыл бұрын
D R I N K
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
*_F I V E H O U R E N E R G Y_*
@petrifiedtoaster8572
4 жыл бұрын
I L O S T A L L M Y E N E R G Y
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
*_J U S T D R I N K M O R E F I V E H O U R E N E R G Y(TM)._*
@Kaerusss
Жыл бұрын
Jore Jarrison has a few words to say about driiiiiiiinks
@ZEROELPOETA
4 жыл бұрын
2:21 - Crystal Cat Piss is a gory beverage on it's own.
@Gl1tch_Gremlin617
4 жыл бұрын
ZEROELPOETA that’s why we shit in the bottles... salottles...
@LunarDelta
4 жыл бұрын
YrorY
@davidvega462
Жыл бұрын
“Sex will mean extra profits.” Truer words have never been spoken 🤷🏼♂️
@carlosr1176
4 жыл бұрын
A good YTP is like the crack of comedy. It’s comedy overload in a good way. I’m always chasing that dragon to laugh uncontrollably again.
@BinglesP
11 ай бұрын
Agreed. I sometimes laugh at my own edits when I make YTPs, even if they're not that good
@WonderBlubber
4 жыл бұрын
HEAVY TESTES IS A WHOLE NEW BEVERAGE EXPERIENCE
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
_We need weed to give us more chill_
@YirbyBond00Y
4 жыл бұрын
"They're looking for riots" Vancouver enters the chat
@ghostquartzgrey5639
4 жыл бұрын
Hong Kong has joined the game
@gordogunso
4 жыл бұрын
YirbyBond00Y chile has entered the ring
@SimonTonekham
4 жыл бұрын
London, UK has joined in the ring!
@lipsmcgee8242
4 жыл бұрын
As a man from Vancouver, I can agree. Just as long as our hockey team loses, we shall riot.
@SimonTonekham
4 жыл бұрын
@@lipsmcgee8242 don't forget about the #Wexit movement - especially in Calgary, Alberta, Canada (I'm not from there but I visited that city back in the summer of 2017)!
@newoldstock_
4 жыл бұрын
Our customers are looking for products that will bring rats to their stores.
@getreal5265
4 жыл бұрын
(weird noises)
@Code7Unltd
4 жыл бұрын
@@getreal5265 but look at buub ookkoo bu snaas. There bstill ba big barket, but bit's bbnot bgoing bas bbbbfast BbBbBb.
@0KylePrior0
4 жыл бұрын
Educational videos like this help me to learn things like: • Profits • Profits • Profits • Space is cold • Profits
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
_Crystal will carbonate your carbonated carbon_
@theflowerboye9073
4 жыл бұрын
You forgot fuck profits profits fuck
@0KylePrior0
3 жыл бұрын
I do believe this video is spiritually stonkful.
@britainluver431
6 ай бұрын
I learned that Pepsi captured Tunis.
@SeannaRose
3 ай бұрын
And sex will bring extra profits!
@orlandowordsmith6208
Жыл бұрын
Of all the highly quotable lines here, the one I keep revisiting in my mind is, "What dakes it mifferent from every other droft sink?" And of course she says it so lackadaisical, as if nothing's wrong. Absolute perfection.
@morlordca
4 жыл бұрын
5:19 “Pepsises dunu sos faaf raar... yaay?” “50 percent successful in our tests” “dddddddddddd” “Try again” “Pepsigshenernnerf” “Profits.”
@orlandowordsmith6208
4 жыл бұрын
It's even funnier when you spell out all the gibberish like that 😁😀
@ziginox
4 жыл бұрын
I love how dejected the guy looks when he says "profits," too.
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
But sex will mean extra profits
@unexpecteditem7919
3 жыл бұрын
I'm really concerned that selling this new crap, could hurt my ass
@Maldoror2112
2 жыл бұрын
@@unexpecteditem7919 Take one for the Noisepuppet Team!
@shuckacuck
4 жыл бұрын
This is a friggin masterpiece. "Crystal Catpiss" made me absolutely lose it.
@charleebrown7188
3 жыл бұрын
Hilarious, but the funniest isnt a joke at all. They sold Crystal Pepsi in cans. They really did. When I saw the Crystal Pepsi aluminum can, it got the biggest laugh for me.
@dc619
4 жыл бұрын
"There has never been a product like Cripple Piss"
@djk1288
3 жыл бұрын
@Jonathan Franco-Martin HoH SiS, because when you need foundation repair, you need foundation repair!
@schimnesthaisbasement5015
2 жыл бұрын
2024 edit: We need noisepuppet back pls I can't believe that the Scrotal Beverage Company released so many Colas in so little time, probably because of PROFITS: - Crispy Piss (0:42) - Cripple Piss (0:50) - Pistal Crepsi (0:56) - Heavy Testis (1:03) - Crazy Pelsi (1:09) - Real Sus (1:22) - LatsystaL (1:33)[Thanks djk1288] - Crystal Peepee (1:53) - Pestilent Pepsi (2:11) [Thanks Jedibob5 for the heads up] - Crystal Cat Piss (2:21) - Crystal Jizzle (3:02) - Crystal Poopsie (4:11 and 6:39) - Meat Beat Pepsi (4:46) [Thanks to shalpp for another heads up] - Crystal Pepsi (4:58, thrice on 5:54 and 6:30) - Crystal Helpsi (5:03) - tsust tsust Pepsinanda sus fuuf (5:19) - pepsumdundun faaf (5:27)
@thecianinator
2 жыл бұрын
Over 100 nasty-ass flavors
@Jedibob5
2 жыл бұрын
I think 1:22 is "CrirC StuutS," and 2:11 is "Pestilent Pepsi"
@Schimnesthai
2 жыл бұрын
@@Jedibob5 M8, should i consider 2:49 (intestines) as another crystal pepsi name edit? It sounds like he was going to say that.
@jackmiller8851
2 жыл бұрын
@@Schimnesthai 1:03 is Peppy Testes, not Heavy Testis. Testes as in latin for testicles, Peppy as in full of energy
@Schimnesthai
2 жыл бұрын
@@jackmiller8851 HEAVY TESTIS is funny af tho
@yurab1834
4 жыл бұрын
3:58 "No one has any future. It's fucked" when a YTP accurately predicts 2020 a year early
@richardgadberry8398
4 жыл бұрын
I can't find any crystal in stores. Who will carbonate my carbonated carbon now?
@SwedeSavard
4 жыл бұрын
I lol'ed at that
@GolemAvalanche
4 жыл бұрын
You might just have to go back to knocking chlorine.
@IffyJottere
4 жыл бұрын
2:10 "The goal of Pestilent Pepsi is to sodomize consumers." I'm dead lol
@teckworks
4 жыл бұрын
TIL: Most sodas are made with fish farts.
@ImFangzBro
4 жыл бұрын
I'm surprised you never saw that happen zooming around outer space. I forget if you ever went onto an ocean planet, but surely you can see fish farts make seltzer on one?
@FartOfAsspiration
2 жыл бұрын
@@ImFangzBro I know there was that one reeeeeally weird one where the sky was the ocean, but I don't remember any fish, let alone farts.
@saxongreen78
Жыл бұрын
It carbonates your carbonated carbon...and adds colour (anal juicings.)
@josepher9071
2 жыл бұрын
Here I go again. The story starts at 4:10 with a compilation of interactions between pushy Pepsico representatives and managers of corporate chain restaurants. For sake of simplicity and anonymity, I'll be giving everyone pseudonyms. The pepsico reps are all forced to memorize scripts and scenarios to refer from but all end up being way too complicated and reverting to "profits" as an answer to everything. Scene 1: Judy and Jack. Judy is an experienced alcoholic store owner and can see the failure of crystal pepsi coming from a mile away. As a result, she wants nothing to do with it and drinks on the job while telling off Jack, who is less experienced at the art of the deal. It begins with her slurring her speech to the point where Jack responds in spanish but quickly reverts back to english because he can't speak spanish for shit. Aware that his gig is up, he admits that only drunkards would drink it. In a fit of frustration he says "fuck you" to Judy and blurts "profits" since that's the only fucking thing the script ends up saying at this point. She is obviously aware of his lack of experience and is not impressed, calling him a pussy. Completely beyond saving at this point, Jack spouts off profits until Judy tells him to shut the fuck up and kicks him out of the store. Scene 2: Richard Gross and Charlie. Richard's always looking to make a buck but he ends up being the shittiest businessman and a colossal idiot. He inherited a few convenience stores from his uncle but ran them into the ground with his gambling addiction and horrid hygiene. Charlie's also a new hire like Jack, and while he tries his best he's just straight up incompetent and just blurts out whatever is on his mind at any given time. Richard likes to introduce himself by his last name and asks who the fuck even drinks crystal pepsi. An answer to which Charles can't stop thinking about how hungry he is and the pickled olives that are in his fridge but gags when thinking about the huge shit he took while jerkin' it in his bathroom and had to glance at the dead rat in the dumpster while on his way to work. Scene 3: Donald and Denise Donald's first impression is his stutter he makes when interacting with members of the opposite sex. Speaking of sex, Denise can't help but take advantage of his hot and bothered state by saying she sucks dicks in exchange for business deals. However, she lets slip that she feels stuck by the job she's in and can't get away or catch a break even after all these years. Perhaps she's not only interested in his privates for business but for pleasure and comfort as well. Scene 4: Richard Gross and Tyler. Tyler's been working for Pepsico almost as long as Denise and could not give a single fuck about any of it anymore. The forced pushing of crystal pepsi into stores is the last straw. He's already turned in his two weeks notice. Now he can say whatever the fuck he wants. Richard's debts have been piling up and the collectors are getting more and more aggressive. However, he read up on subliminal messages and believes that interjecting a help between every fucking word will hypnotize people into giving him money. Tyler's dealt with Richard's type before and completely ignores his 4d chess bullshit. Instead, he talks about one time he was tripping balls and convinced himself he witnessed a vision where someone 30 years in the future tries crystal pepsi and pukes it almost immediately. Scene 5: Richard Gross and Andy Andy's a new hire and has a decent time remembering the script but can't handle improvising worth a damn. This scene actually takes place immediately after Richard was mugged by some thugs hired by the debt collectors. Obviously showing signs of a concussion and brain injury, Richard lets loose a torrent of inane dribbling that Andy doesn't react to very well. There's no part in the script for this. He just picks some random ass statistic and starts naming it off when Richard more adamantly says... stuff. The only acknowledgement Andy can show is by telling him to try again to which Richard is still unable to speak properly. Having given up, he goes to the one spot in the script everyone uses as their last resort. Scene 6: Richard Gross and Tyler After his brain injury, Richard NEEDS to boost his sales and profits as soon as possible lest his head gets caved in again. Tyler still gives no shits and talks about his experience getting constipation from pepsi products. Richard may have also experienced some aftershock from his concussion and Tyler's just like "eh... profits... whatever..." To which Richard plays a hail mary and orders a shipment of them to be delivered the next day. Scene 7: Richard Gross and Denise Denise doesn't even say anything and Richard is smitten, immediately saying they can go to pound town on the fuck truck but the store is so crowded that they'll need to do it in the middle of the store. Denise gets kinky and suggests anal and profits have even managed to become a fetish for her. Scene 8: Donald and Jack Donald picks up bad vibes from Jack immediately and tells him where the fuck he can put their advertisements. Jack's a cheeky bastard and is like "well, I've already put it up my ass, old man." as he barges out of the store. Scene 9: Judy and Tyler In a drunken state, Judy ogles and Tyler's body and suggests fucking in a barrel. However, he refuses her sexual advances and we get a little bit of insecurity from Tyler who immediately changes the subject to the most pointless and awkward thing he could think of. It is revealed later that Tyler is super gay but will only show it when he's got the hots for someone. Scene 10: Richard Gross and Charlie. Richard realizes he's as good as dead soon because crystal pepsi has not brought him neither sales nor profits to pay off his debts. As a results, he's been a loose canon and ejaculating into the sandwiches. Due to the stress from realizing he's just confessed this to the pepsico rep he start having an aneurism. Charlie's best method of cummunication is to mimic Richard's speech and play along with what he perceives as a joke by suggesting cumstomers can drink cum too. Scene 11: Donald and Tyler Donald expresses his lack of faith in pepsico given how much of a shit product crustal poopsi is. Tyler, as always, gives no fucks and gets right to the point with his advances. He really do like Donald's thicc juicy booty. Scene 12: Richard Gross and Andy idk they say toot moom a lot Overall, another 10/10 story about greed, guilt, sales, and profits.
@noisepuppet
2 жыл бұрын
This is canon
@josepher9071
2 жыл бұрын
I knew it
@divecolosio4988
Жыл бұрын
Scene 12: Gross were eventually beaten to his demise by the thugs hired by the debt collectors. He somehow reappeared as an apparition in such a weird curse, his soul is wondering 'casually' with no purpose, haunting the store he's beaten but without scaring people at all. Andy, being such a clumsy guy he is, in the day after he's being murdered, he met Gross not knowing it's his damned soul he's speaking in a businesslike manner, Gross were having a demonic curse that what everything he says to the living persons were different to what they hear, hence Gross would says Toot a lot of times, Andy for some reason just follow along until he thought Gross makes fun of him, hence "You Beach!ĺ
@escaperoutebritish
4 жыл бұрын
6:29 is absolutely top tier sentence mixing, I love this
@lawnshark025
4 жыл бұрын
The repeating of “profits” eventually starts to sound like “crawfish”
@orlandowordsmith6208
4 жыл бұрын
As long as they aren't farting in the bottles...selttottles
@John_Demarco
4 жыл бұрын
"Space is cold." Agreed.
@sleepyburr
4 жыл бұрын
Damn this gives a whole new meaning to 7 minutes in heaven
@Kaerusss
11 ай бұрын
No one's ever ready for the bondage storm
@mitchellharrop9989
4 жыл бұрын
“They’re looking for riots.” They got them all right.
@ichangedmyname2231
4 жыл бұрын
Yes
@matthewbarr6685
4 жыл бұрын
The official drink of Antifa is Cyrstal Pepsi 😂.
@AsAboveISoBelow
4 жыл бұрын
Tha's for dang sure.
@kenetickups6146
3 жыл бұрын
topical
@Sakhmeov
3 жыл бұрын
Is it this Friday?
@dyslexsticks3381
Жыл бұрын
I keep coming back to this YTP every now and then. It has some of the best sentence mixing I've ever seen.
@bachaddict
Жыл бұрын
it's crispy piss, and the meme is tight!
@GataZGinkgo
4 жыл бұрын
"No one has any future, it's fucked" Well, you're not wrong. Least I can still get my carbonated carbon carbonated in the future
@djk1288
2 жыл бұрын
Not to mention Crystal will still drive our trucks.
@RWSCOTT
4 жыл бұрын
when noisepuppet brings the poop, it feels so good
@SquishyZoran
4 жыл бұрын
Lol
@Pulchism
4 жыл бұрын
It's all 'bout that consistent absurdity, no filler!
@outfoxies
4 жыл бұрын
"we need weed to give us more chill" same
@whiffy506
4 жыл бұрын
this is the way
@brianboden6957
4 жыл бұрын
@@whiffy506 there's not been a product quite like CRIPPEN piss
@TellEmB290
2 жыл бұрын
I hate when I run out of weed and therefore chill, and capture Tunis in my frustration
@thecianinator
2 жыл бұрын
especially after seeing our mom's big testicles
@DrdrGames
4 жыл бұрын
2:21 - “Crystal *cat piss* is a gory beverage all its own.”
@Will_Negs
11 ай бұрын
I miss you, Noisepuppet. You'll always be a classic.
@Wolfie00777
4 жыл бұрын
"Crystal is certainly not a flan. It's a brand. It's a brand of flan. They ask for flan, and they're buying a brand of flan, again and again."
@Circuitssmith
4 жыл бұрын
*again and agan
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
Buttsex will mean extra profits
@franz.francisco
4 жыл бұрын
i'm crying lmfao
@shaunj66
2 жыл бұрын
2:54 timestamp for those looking
@abstractgrant
Жыл бұрын
Take the golden An, give it to Dan, in the tan van
@@Circuitssmith crystal cat piss is my personal favorite
@jeffcarroll1990shock
4 жыл бұрын
New coke
@Wotvr
7 ай бұрын
When you're trying to sell Pepsi but all you can think of is the vast cold emptiness of space.
@noisepuppet
7 ай бұрын
Crystal Pepsi, like all commercial food items, is the miserable offspring of lunacy and lawless violence. The Total Beverage distributor is suddenly unable to distract himself from this terrible knowledge. His gaze lights upon the freezer section, prompting fantasies of escape into a vast white Arctic emptiness. But it is not enough. In the distance, he sees the frozen plain broken by a small rectangle of red and green. A group of absentee investors living in Central Park West have placed a 7-11 here. PepsiCo products stalk him even in this wind-blasted polar desolation. His thoughts turn to the eternal darkness of interstellar space, where he might drift alone, beyond the reach of Pepsi, beyond even the forgiveness of the Almighty. Profits.
@Wotvr
7 ай бұрын
Profits
@bachaddict
5 ай бұрын
He could go along with the thing about the sex barrel though
@DEADMALLANGEL
Жыл бұрын
2022 and this is still lowkey one of the best YTPs out there
@Tirgo69
Жыл бұрын
Look. Crystal stinks
@osuasheuatl
4 жыл бұрын
"In their shibubbish bins" I don't know if this is a conscious Flalf Mom reference, but it's one of the many instances where having a solid grounding in noisepuppet's filmography pays off.
@YirbyBond00Y
4 жыл бұрын
I'm all in on the Noisepuppet YTP universe
@nicklespale22
2 жыл бұрын
ok so i just caught that reading out the spelling.. o.O
@MAYONNAISEMOOSE
4 жыл бұрын
"we've captured Tunis" part had me dead
@Erdenichtspricht
4 жыл бұрын
0:20 look at how hyped those rats are for the product!
@machine_elf4361
2 жыл бұрын
You are the greatest youtube pooper of all time NoisePuppet.
@PalaceIV
7 ай бұрын
I come back and watch this every now and then cause it's that good. One of my all time fav YTPs.
@shoopusdawhoopus
4 жыл бұрын
You're the only YTPer I've followed in the last 13 or so years who does straight-up CoC and SoS jokes with this level of grace. Outstanding work. Also, 2:54 to 3:01 is SUBLIME
@dracodeanglicus3857
4 жыл бұрын
How will Crystal Helpsi increase help in my help?
@jirden
4 жыл бұрын
“There’s never been a product quite like Cripple Piss.”
@LunarDelta
4 жыл бұрын
"Pestilent Pepsi" I lost it right then.
@heroinmom153
9 ай бұрын
The world needs Noisepuppet more than ever. With Krobo back now, it's only a matter of time!
@TheWorstAmy-LegacyAccount
4 жыл бұрын
I come back to this every few months and laugh my ass off at something different every time.
@gene4438
4 жыл бұрын
"It's not just a cola, it's a cola"
@CityofButterfly
4 жыл бұрын
Drink 5 Hour Energy. It's not a drink, more like a drink.
@antonsavosin75
4 жыл бұрын
I think the idea that it's not a drink makes it seem like it's a drink
@thepthepthep
4 жыл бұрын
6:35 was the hardest I've ever laughed at a YTP
@Circuitssmith
4 жыл бұрын
(Nods)
@woolfy02
4 жыл бұрын
Tap.dat.ASS
@JCondorYTPs
7 ай бұрын
The nod at the end was the cherry on top
@KNIGH7
4 жыл бұрын
You’ve outdone yourself with this: in length, and in laughs.
@ScientistCat
4 жыл бұрын
don't you mean, in LeL and in LuLs
@obsidiandeluxe4474
4 жыл бұрын
And *profits*
@turingsghost
4 жыл бұрын
it's unbelievable to me that this was made in 2019. already feels like a golden age ytp
@saxachewon8062
2 жыл бұрын
Even more so in 2022
@Maldoror2112
2 жыл бұрын
@@saxachewon8062 We need much more Noisepuppet in these challenging and difficult times!
@erichwashausen4602
Жыл бұрын
3:58 what should be said during forums and speeches about global warming
@ajshell2
3 жыл бұрын
Pistol Crepsi is one of the best thing I've heard in a YTP in a long time.
@kclark5382
4 жыл бұрын
“No one has any future... its f@*#d.” Well that’s depressing
@H3fron
4 жыл бұрын
FeelsBadMan
@Bassdriver
4 жыл бұрын
This is the one that made my face hurt.
@punpun6601
3 жыл бұрын
Well well would you look at that
@21Cayque12
3 жыл бұрын
It's perfectly fucked
@ChaseMC215
2 жыл бұрын
2020 anyone?
@spugintrntl
4 жыл бұрын
Dude, careful. If you keep outdoing yourself like this you'll rupture the hoh sis layer and destroy the toot.
@Maldoror2112
3 жыл бұрын
As long as he doesn't blow up the Faff plant that was making Rar Feweef for the Spapes, I'm good. Or maybe I'm hoping he does...!
@Azurestar
4 жыл бұрын
This was an absolutely wild ride from start to finish, bless you noisepuppet and all your funky old VHS sources
@zericle1
4 жыл бұрын
"There's never been a product quite like Crippin piss, a Hoh Sis."
@synysterjazmyngates
4 жыл бұрын
“we can help customers wreck the whole company.”
@coolkusti
4 жыл бұрын
>I'll go along with that thing about the sex barrel. >Space is cold. *Knowing nod* Hit me like 12 bricks.
@thebandanadee8265
4 жыл бұрын
Did it also hit you like 17 likes?
@dumbcatposter
4 жыл бұрын
I love it because it can either mean the same thing as "Water is wet." or just be a semi-creepy non-sequitur.
@QuintusCunctator
4 жыл бұрын
Damnit, Noisepuppet, you've made it impossible to quote the best bits of this YTP. I can't quote the whole damn thing!
@DaveTypeII
4 жыл бұрын
QuintusCunctator Don’t worry. RadicalFaith360 will do it for you!
@WonderBlubber
4 жыл бұрын
It's a brand of flan. They ask for flan and they're buying a brand of flan again and again.
@bridgetoneill9684
4 жыл бұрын
*again and agAN
@ryeinc
3 жыл бұрын
“They’re looking for riots.” Those customers are sure going to enjoy 2020.
@jakespacepiratee3740
Жыл бұрын
Why?
@Mr.Obongo
Жыл бұрын
@@jakespacepiratee3740 🙄
@MeetLocalSingles
4 жыл бұрын
" crystal *cat piss* " was so smooth wtf
@subzerobadass
4 жыл бұрын
3:33 "in their rubbish bins, in their shibbubbish bins..." JEBUS I didn't even catch that on the first watch
@orlandowordsmith6208
4 жыл бұрын
Rarr-ri-RARR-ri-rar!
@macjones6394
4 жыл бұрын
3:05 I'm happy to know as a historian, Crystal Pepsi was the belligerent that captured Tunis, not Charles V of the Hapsburg Empire.
@GolemAvalanche
4 жыл бұрын
Wow, 7 minutes long? Not to mention I get to learn how to market to unconscious customers and how to carbonate that carbonated carbon I've been holding onto for years? This is excellent.
@SkylabBeats
3 жыл бұрын
I love the "nasty-ass flavors" joke 😂
@Not_an_alligator
4 жыл бұрын
3:04 *_We've captured Tunis_* This may be the best ytp I've ever seen solely because of this single line
@adalinesimonian
4 жыл бұрын
of all the jokes "space is cold" is the one that gets me go figure
@kylebennett789
4 жыл бұрын
0:52 There's nothing better than HOH SIS
@thegreatcarraway
4 жыл бұрын
Man that joke takes me back...
@ArcturusOTE
4 жыл бұрын
I dOn'T CarE! Hint: If you don't know, it's a joke from CS188's Commercialism Up Your Chimneyhole YTP
@firstnamelastname7244
4 жыл бұрын
You want the JoJ
@ImpendingRiot83
4 жыл бұрын
CommunistSquidward 420 They’ll do it all over again.
@swumbles
4 жыл бұрын
i understood that reference
@solidsnake2085
4 жыл бұрын
The lady at 4:51 looks like she has eyes painted over her eyelids.
@dannyg1812
4 жыл бұрын
😂 she really does
@unicornsparkleswirl7564
4 жыл бұрын
@@hoobaguy me too
@KingLich451
4 жыл бұрын
hahahahahhhah
@coreyradons7495
4 жыл бұрын
"MA! THERES A WEIRD FUCKIN LADY IN THE STORE!"
@Bobuxgaming0
2 жыл бұрын
sus
@manoflego123
4 жыл бұрын
Watching the changing landscape of KZitem over the last decade, I did not suspect that not only would the genre with the most staying power be YTPs, but that they would consistently improve over the last few years.
@MetalWolf426
3 жыл бұрын
2:41 I agree wholeheartedly. Really glad someone finally said it.
@9thDallasMowerExpo
4 жыл бұрын
Aha, so Crystal Pepsi is popular with unconscious customers? I wondered why their delivery men kept piping sleeping gas into my supermarket...
@HaroldDuggart
4 жыл бұрын
I was just about to go to bed when this popped up on my feed. Sleep can wait.
@courtneymiddleton9663
4 жыл бұрын
Please tell me I wasn't the only one that caught sus cuks 😂
@liliannakifflin6343
3 жыл бұрын
This shows that Noisepuppet is the most underrated KZitemr of all time, and we should acknowledge how funny his YTPs are.
@pupbrained
4 жыл бұрын
"they're looking for riots" yeah I think you got those now
@SpartanRithimus
4 жыл бұрын
What a spellbinding piece of work... Truly harrowing.
@saxongreen78
4 жыл бұрын
^^Top comment! ☺
@thespanishinquisition8628
4 жыл бұрын
I'm really glad they dropped fish farts as an ingredient
@Fuzy2K
4 жыл бұрын
They use squid poop now.
@EarthboundX
4 жыл бұрын
4:10 I don't know why, but I actually kinda find it cute when she says crystal poopsie, haha. It feels oddly wholesome to me.
@-fuk57
4 жыл бұрын
"Wow! That looks like a colon I wanna trash." OMFG
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