Drill deeper. Focus on just one person and how they make you feel. Describe everything in detail. We often set up walls that block out something that is bothering us. Before we can eliminate those problems completely we have to first take down all the walls and embrace the feelings completely
@derekbanas
13 жыл бұрын
@alexgidge That is definitely a great way to control your emotions! My internal struggles always stemmed from my personality being so tied to fulfilling obligations. I even did this when I knew I was being taken advantage of. I was ultimately able to rid myself of this extreme problem by believing my duty was not towards doing what others expected of me, but what God expected. I don't mean to get all religious, but this helped me tremendously! I now do what I feel is right and ignore others
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
People love to forgive people that ask for forgiveness and promise to be a good friend from now on. If you give them a heartfelt apology they will forgive you. If they don't, they aren't worth having as friends anyway :)
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
It isn't a replacement for psychology by any means. It was just meant as positive help to get people to think through their problems.
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
I can't understand how someone that experiences love on a regular basis could ever harm anyone? Anytime I feel sad it is amazing how a little hug from my wife or children will make me feel better instantly. I'm glad you enjoyed the video :)
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks :)
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
You may benefit from working to develop you other submodalities. Extreme bad memories can sometimes only be replaced by extremely positive memories. One instructor I had said it is impossible to jump out of an airplane and not feel relief when you land safely on the ground. I'm not saying skydiving is the only option, but other actions that allow you to explore your capabilities are definitely going to help.
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
I'm glad you enjoy them. I'll do tutorials on any topic
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
If you are watching my videos, chances are you are smart. Most people watch tv, or goofy videos instead of educational ones. That is ok, but I'm very happy that you liked my video :)
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
I often feel the same as you describe. I can tell you that they will at least help you understand why people act the way they do irregardless of personality. People aren't very complicated when it comes down to it. Sadly most people seem to suffer from being brainwashed most of their lives. If you find difficulty in dealing with that, I'd guess that that makes you healthy and more in control than most :)
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
I don't think you want to completely eliminate emotion, but instead you want to control it. You need to figure out what controls you negatively in life. I have personality tests that will provide those answers. I for example figured out through personality analysis that most negatives in my life came from caring to much about what others thought about me. I worked to subdue those feelings and now I'm never depressed. Feel free to ask questions
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) I'm very happy that you like them. I have many more coming
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
The experts on this topic say to eliminate negative feelings associated with bad events that you would need to bring in tactile sensations into the bad thoughts. If the negative thoughts are associated with a thing, then you should take that thing or place and try to have a positive experience there. That is why they always tell people it is healthy to reconcile with others. There is nothing positive to be gained by having negative thoughts
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Many people don't know I'll do tutorials on anything. The only problem occurs when somebody asks a question that takes 18 videos to answer :) I love doing non-programming tutorials, but nobody ever asks those questions anymore. I was probably talking softly because my baby was asleep
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
A memories can be stored in many ways sight, taste, audio, feelings, etc. You are remembering this event as a feeling. To make it go away you must build up the other senses. This can sometimes take time, but if you focus away from just the feelings you can eventually soften the events effects on you. This can sometimes be painful or stressing.
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
I want to congratulate you on that. Very few people educate themselves now a day unless they are forced. More power to you :)
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
This is just based on what I read, but it has worked for me. Anytime you find yourself feeling bad you are supposed to change your state. So if you find you are sitting alone by yourself when you normally feel bad instead force yourself out amongst others. Do as many new things as possible. If you have never bungie jumped do that. Prove to yourself that now you have more options rather than the few that you had previously. Use the breakup as an excuse for why you have to do something fun
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) This stuff comes from people much smarter then myself. I'm glad you liked it
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Look for people that are nice and that can provide guidance. Look for activities that will make you feel good about yourself : volunteer, sports, activities with other people, etc. Take up new hobbies. There are many people out there that gain fulfillment from helping others, or that are looking for others to share a favorite hobby with. I have personality tests that may help on my KZitem channel. You control your life and change is just 1 decision away
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) I don't know why I ever did that? It just made sense to me. If someone walked up to me in public and said Hello Internet I think I'd freak out
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) I wish you the best as well
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
All of this stuff comes from a countless number of NLP books. I was trained, but most everything can be found in the Richard Bandler, John Grinder and the Michael Hall book The User's Manual for the Brain. I have most of it for free on my site :)
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) I do my best
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
You're very welcome :) thank you for taking the time to tell me you liked them.
@ThePanafrica
12 жыл бұрын
I appreciate this response! I was feeling like an "emotional rollercoaster"...which made me have more ill feelings toward my self. You are right, I chose watching an educational video b/c I am TRYING to improve myself.
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you for making that point. That gives me some other ideas to explore. i'm glad you liked the video :)
@derekbanas
13 жыл бұрын
@CarbineerKenny Thank you :) I actually have playlists. On my channel click on playlists and then scroll until you see Psychology Tutorials, Negotiation Tutorials, Sales, etc.
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) We all have bad days. We all have crippling irrational reactions to events that seem out of our control. Only by hunting down and eliminating these subconscious triggers can we live lives in which we are in complete control
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
This is but one point of view on how our brains store negative feelings. Many people believe that certain stimuli can make us feel a certain way. This can turn a happy healthy person sad in an instant. Here I'm trying to describe some ways to eliminate negative stimuli among other things
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
@PLaris89 I've had a bunch of different jobs. I know about the psychology stuff because I used to write sales scripts for big corporations. I occasionally still do but the telemarketing world fell apart. I now mainly make shopping carts and intranet CSM sites
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) I'm glad you enjoyed it
@Nikolaii99
11 жыл бұрын
i had a dream where i disproved a popular physics theory... i'm kicking myself to this day that i didn't write it down... occasionally, i'll repeat a dream years later (sometimes exactly, but if i remember what's coming ahead, i can make changes)... Hopefully, i can repeat the physics one, and write it down. I'm convinced i had a strong position.
@derekbanas
13 жыл бұрын
@GigaBoost I used to do that in college. It required me to drop all stimulants like coffee and alcohol. It was cool because I could have a conversation with the imaginary people in the dream. They always seemed confused though. I got good at creating surroundings, but never mastered the creation of intelligent people in the dream. I'll explore this further
@derekbanas
13 жыл бұрын
@CarbineerKenny I'm glad it helped you. Everyone should be taught these techniques. They really help well, control your emotions :)
@sharanpal
12 жыл бұрын
Thanks, your presentation is clear and concise ..and I'm going to try these techniques. Negative emotions can almost ruin my day's performance and I used to practice " I can live with that " approach, which certainly was no easy task .
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you for the kind message :) I'm not all that smart, but thank you for saying so
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you :) many people think this is just random stuff from books, but I used to study this stuff in the real world. You should check out my sales techniques video. It is the most honed info. We tested this stuff on people in financial companies. It was very fascinating, but also a little scary how easy people are manipulated. I have never been the same since
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you very much :)
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Hi, that just means you have very highly developed representational systems. That is quite rare. We normally only develop one system. People like you are normally artists
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you :)
@robenalapointe4142
9 жыл бұрын
Fantastic, for explaining to clients how negative emotions can be changed to positive ones.
@derekbanas
9 жыл бұрын
Robena LaPointe Thank you :)
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
I made this years ago before I got pretty good at making videos. I never use background music anymore
@safiaharun4977
11 жыл бұрын
Good day Darek. Being able to differentiate between Submodalities is a great! I like the part you speak about love. Love a feeling that cant be fully understood by men but is a great way of connecting with others. whether their family or complete strangers. Thank you for educating me on Submodalities. A little add on. The text was clear, your voice was enough. cheers.
@jakyalani
11 жыл бұрын
It's funny I have negotiated more than 25 yrs and I'm also involve in arbitrations and I have used body techniques, ieg hand placement, legs crossed etc and it has almost always helped me expose a lie unless the person is a sociopath. Good job.
@leftysonstage
11 жыл бұрын
hi i just found your channel a few weeks ago and your tutorials are fun to watch and a few have actually helped me out a lot so i want to say thank you very much for the tutorials.
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
You're very welcome :)
@derekbanas
14 жыл бұрын
@SPDRACR4 Your welcome :) It's all based on Neurolinguistic Programming, which most of the self help guys like Tony Robbins talk about. Thanks for the comment
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Do you think you can recall sound better then most people? You may just be a person that is more in touch with auditory learning. That is common
@angelboooo
12 жыл бұрын
Kaboom, what a mind bender...I hope. Creative visualization is a powerful tool. Thanks for posting the steps involved in emotion control in such a clear and concise manner. Although, for myself it will probably be more difficult than it seems. I'm excited to try this, how empowering it would be to control unwanted patterns of the mind.
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
That is normally a good sign yes
@taylortaylor5626
11 жыл бұрын
My submodalities are the exact same for every kind of an emotion. I see all of my memories very clearly, in color, and feel as if I'm there. I have very strong feelings when thinking of past events.On a daily basis, I have very little emotional control. I'm not sure what to replace the bad memories with.
@derekbanas
14 жыл бұрын
@LordConnorStudios I'm guessing your asking this because I was featured? It seems to be a matter of luck. I do have a lot of video's though so that might have something to do with it? Click on the links in the Promoting Your Video section to see KZitem's hints for making your video stand out. The two most important things for making your video popular are ensuring that it has tags and descriptions that allow people to find it and letting people know that it's up there. Hope that helps
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
I made a tutorial called Get people to like you that may help. The easiest thing to do is to do exciting things that are worth talking about. The more you drift out of your comfort zone the less you will care about the judgements of others.
@ezzerhere
11 жыл бұрын
I find that most of my memories, whether pleasant or unpleasant, are in full-color and through my own eyes, complete with sound, realistic enough that I can almost relive the moment. The main differences are, I only have tactile sensation (textures, etc) in good memories, and some bad memories can occasionally switch into slow motion (as well as I can describe it) in places, either distorting or cutting off sound- but I acutely re-experience all feelings associated with either. Emo 4 life? lol
@jogosua1755
Жыл бұрын
Can you add more videos like this? or other Psychology Tutorials :> Thank you so much for your videos and there's a lot to learn from you!
@damirko
9 жыл бұрын
Great video series oh psychology, can you please do some videos dealing with removing procrastination, bettering your focus when learning new material and with increasing your memory ability. Thank you
@derekbanas
9 жыл бұрын
+Mirko Cukich Thank you :) I actually use a bunch of psychological tricks to motivate myself. In my sales videos I touch on them being the reciprocation, consistency, bandwagoning, liking, authority, scarcity and competitive scarcity principles. I basically sell myself. I was able to convince myself to run 10 miles per day using these techniques. They are all covered in my sales videos on my KZitem channel. Everything is free and I hope it helps. If you have any other questions just ask.
@damirko
9 жыл бұрын
Cool, you are very welcome. I will check them out. Thank you for all the awesome videos. Keep up the great work.
@MrAcerCyrus
12 жыл бұрын
thnx so much for making this video.....im so happy that ive eliminated the thing i want in my highschool life! tnx man :)
@rahulkumar-uf3si
12 жыл бұрын
Hey , these are fantastic tutorials in a subject I have long been interested in , if possible could you please share some of the resources you studied to make these tutorials . thank you
@capo328
11 жыл бұрын
At least half of the video seems to assume that negative memories and positive memories have different submodalities. For me, both have the same submodalties so it's impossible to switch the negative for the positive. :/ The swish technique in the last two minutes is helpful, however. Thanks for the video.
@monnyvele
11 жыл бұрын
You are amazingly smart and well spoken. Thanks:)
@bluerate2291
10 жыл бұрын
It is actually awesome info. I am too trying this and getting astonishing results. Thanks a ton again!!!
@derekbanas
10 жыл бұрын
bluerate I'm glad I could help :)
@SmartVisionMethod
11 жыл бұрын
Education Revolution,We all have untapped learning skills that needs to be given to young people.We have developed a simple teaching method that gives instant access to every student that will empower them with the skills that prevent them from achiev ing the succes.By providing young people with focusing techniques they will develop self-confidence and courage to finish what they srarted.We are giving all young people a complete package free of charge at mental training & improving life skills
@epicfairyqueen
11 жыл бұрын
all my memories are in colour and surround me completely, I also see everything through my own eyes, sounds are not as strong. however most of my dreams I see myself as it was a movie and more often that not, Im a completely different person.
@SPDRACR4
14 жыл бұрын
Thank you. This is very good information.
@intensity67
11 жыл бұрын
Thank you so much for this video...
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
As far as I know it is not
@derekbanas
13 жыл бұрын
@bruce1movies It's kind of like brainwashing yourself. There could be negative consequences along with the good definitely. There is a very famous group that does this stuff on a regular basis. Can you guess who they are? And, no I don't belong to their group
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Sorry about that :(
@chippy33able
11 жыл бұрын
Thanks, these are good. take care.
@derekbanas
12 жыл бұрын
That's funny :D God night to you
@GigaBoost
13 жыл бұрын
I just found this channel, loads of great stuff. Any chance we could get a "how to lucid dream" video? ;)
@derekbanas
14 жыл бұрын
@haleemaabeer Thanks a bunch
@tamaraben-shachar5290
11 жыл бұрын
In all the examples I remembered, both negative and positive, I saw myself in black and white and did not feel anything. How do I learn to have more vivid emotional memories?
@nawalpp7
11 жыл бұрын
I love your video. Very informative!
@OliverKlozoffffff
11 жыл бұрын
how do you get over emotion of love and rejection? how do you not get angry and depressed
@solinmeow
12 жыл бұрын
How do I get over a difficult break up? He was the love of my life..
@JackVGallivan
11 жыл бұрын
Wow your vids are awesome. Thanks again
@IKilledMufasa5
9 жыл бұрын
This was interesting but it wasn't exactly what I was looking for. How do you control your emotions in the moment? Not when you are re-experiencing something through memory, but when you are experiencing it for the first time - during the occurrence of a stressful event - how do you stay calm?
@derekbanas
9 жыл бұрын
IKilledMufasa5 Practice relaxation techniques so that you can use them when you lose control of your emotions instantly. Take a deep breath though your nose while counting to 5 and then breath out through your mouth while counting to 5. Try other techniques and you'll be ready when you need them :)
@IKilledMufasa5
9 жыл бұрын
Thanks.
@83syun
11 жыл бұрын
Hi Derek, if I cannot recall a memory - i only can recall to the part of picture where I am in too, without sound and that is all - probably it i only can recall the expression of others but freezing pic. And bad experience, I only can recall the part that make me upset the most (example: i am once angry and throw a book into the air - i only can recall the part of throwing the book in air - freeze)
@FakeGrapefruit
11 жыл бұрын
Derek all of my past experiences are through my own eyes and in color. Does that mean I am in good control?
@mosullivan15
11 жыл бұрын
No, there is no sound, although I do know what was said, and there is nothing else.
@mmhmumin
11 жыл бұрын
Great idea
@laihelen3028
9 жыл бұрын
This video is awesome! can you explain how to do well in an interview?
@derekbanas
9 жыл бұрын
Lai Helen Thank you :) Here is the interview video kzitem.info/news/bejne/kmeuuoOLa6yCoXo
@buenogoodlive
12 жыл бұрын
@derekbanas Interesting, what do you mean by stumulants, in specfics? I would like to know more on the subject.
@TheMarcelcadiz
10 жыл бұрын
lol..thanks BRO. i really appreciate you. Ill try that.
@TheMarcelcadiz
10 жыл бұрын
hi. im 35years old. and have lost the BEST part of my years in fear of people. neg. judgement. it makes me feel like a nobody. how do i deal with judgement and the nect level of nasty person...and deal with "confontation' from others. where i end up "neutralizing" the wrong doer...and not walking away. which just seems to guarentee more of it !!!!!!!!! any tips that you have will be apperciated and definetley applied (:D THANKS-A-BUNCH.
@derekbanas
10 жыл бұрын
One of the greatest things you can learn is that when another person says something hateful to you that that tells you more about that person then it does about yourself. My Great Grandmother put it this way when I asked her a similar question. "When have you ever asked a dog turd what it thought about you?" A person that hurts others in any way is worth less then a dog turd. If you want to improve your self esteem the easiest way is to do things that scare or excite you on a regular basis. This can be as simple as riding a roller coaster or as extreme as bungie jumping or sky diving. I guarantee that your self esteem will increase each time you conquer any fear.
@mosullivan15
11 жыл бұрын
I don't see my memories in either black and white nor colour (nor sepia I'm not being a smartass), I just see them as a sheet of 100% blank white, and I just know things are there. Any input?
@AntonySammeroff
10 жыл бұрын
I will try it with excessive shame and guilt feelings that come up surrounding past events where I embarassed myself, any suggestions?
@derekbanas
10 жыл бұрын
The more that you challenge yourself to conquer your fears, the more you will build your self esteem. We all get stuck in bad moods. The best way to get out of them is to change our state. I have always found if I get in a bad mood I can get myself out of it by changing my diet, exercising and reading. Take some time for yourself. Do something fun. Enjoy yourself. You deserve it.
@smanap3859
7 жыл бұрын
Derek, this is a very helpful video
@derekbanas
7 жыл бұрын
Thank you :)
@aj_sdc
11 жыл бұрын
...oh wow...
@Partyffs
12 жыл бұрын
Holy hell....i got stoned by listening to you :O :D Thanks and god night ^^
@TheBulletproof357
11 жыл бұрын
What's the purpose of the background music?
@safarigurl150
12 жыл бұрын
you should explain SUBMODAITLIES more..u said they are differences...u gave an example of seeing something in black and white as opposed to color? can u give more examples? the color thing is easy,but the other sounds, images,etc arent so black and white excuse the pun.ex. i saw a negative situation in color, with hearing the voice on my teacher embarassing me....but i see through my own eyes remember feeling....i think of positive image, stroking my cat (pet) and its also in color, what to do
@kickingpinay
11 жыл бұрын
good thing that you're covering other things aside from java :D. Weird but, your voice is a little different in this tutorial.
@kyramichel4454
5 жыл бұрын
Emotions are controllable! Great video on cognitive psychology. There is also a subconscious approach to developing conscious control over negative emotions and reactions, and dealing with bad memories. More at: www.selfimprovementtherapy.com/p/scientific-research-harvard-medical.html
@WreggieNN
10 жыл бұрын
how can i know , that i made the right decisions, what are my body language??, please help .
@derekbanas
10 жыл бұрын
I have experienced that it is very hard to make any decision that can't be corrected at a later point. Often decisions that I made that seemed bad ended up being fabulous ideas. Here is a perfect example. I took a job that paid me a lot of money, but it required me to work 80 hours a week. I did that for 2 years. My health and my marriage suffered. One day I decided even though a had the stomach flu that I would go to work. Because of years of over work and my illness I crashed my truck and almost died on my way home. Sounds like a bad decision? That car crash forced me to change my life. I now love my work and I make more money. The car crash also convinced my wife that we should have kids. I now have 2 wonderful daughters and my wife and I spend way more time together. I'm the happiest person I know and I have it all because of a car crash and the stomach flu :)
@safarigurl150
12 жыл бұрын
omg that high school bullshit i remember it. EVERYONE has a past (well maybe THEY dont yet cuz they are so inexperiened in life) and do these ppl even KONW u? its bad enough if the ppl that know u, who are supposed to be ur friends otherwise not worth the time are judging u for things like that, but spreading rumors and stuff? this stuff dies down after high school, believe me, ppl become more mature. just grit ur teeth and keep going
@derekbanas
11 жыл бұрын
Sorry, but I don't know who that is. I know I talk funny :)
@rjdesign4android
11 жыл бұрын
Love or video
@SnowLilies
11 жыл бұрын
dude sometimes your inflection reminds me of Shoenice :|
Пікірлер: 119