Guys please remember "It is not your job to drown yourself in keeping others afloat"
@williamstafford8324
11 ай бұрын
Lol but it is😂😂 an you know one of thows guys to you should tell him😊
@slaayerr1
11 ай бұрын
@williamstafford8324 sadly true lol. They say this on the internet but expect a guy to sink under their l trauma since like 90% of women have trauma 😂
@cliffterrell4876
11 ай бұрын
@@slaayerr1self induced trauma.
@Instinct0425
11 ай бұрын
@@cliffterrell4876and they want men to bear their self-induced trauma 💀
@cliffterrell4876
11 ай бұрын
@@Instinct0425 yep
@liamfisher8933
11 ай бұрын
Boys, if you’ve dated a girl with trauma and it didn’t work out don’t let this message fill you with regret. You did what you could with the knowledge you had, and there are many more reasons out there why things don’t work between two people. It’s not just your fault. Be kind to yourself, but still learn from the past. Keep those heads up kings
@elgar6743
11 ай бұрын
Women with trauma expect their men to cosplay as white knights 24/7. Yeah, HARD Pass...recreational use only, maybe.
@ZebDaNegev
11 ай бұрын
❤thank you for this message of positivity
@corneraction6765
11 ай бұрын
Definitely thanks for saying it because as someone who just dealt with that. Steer clear of the ones with trauma bros.
@cassianbarker4415
11 ай бұрын
I would disagree. We can't judge people based strictly on the past they can't control, its based completely on how they deal with their trauma. @@corneraction6765
@FilipRanogajec
11 ай бұрын
Wise words, Liam.
@Joe-wo7rg
11 ай бұрын
If she is dealing with trauma, stay clear of her.
@mattheworoark1459
11 ай бұрын
Why?
@denisdonohue1863
11 ай бұрын
she'll destroy your life@@mattheworoark1459
@J_head432
11 ай бұрын
@@mattheworoark1459because they often attack you at the slightest bit of a problem, been there, done that.
@Devoliver144
11 ай бұрын
Disagree. Nearly everyone has trauma so if she's *not* dealing with it stear clear. Or at least be suspicious.
@itzdj4686
11 ай бұрын
@@Devoliver144I think he means unhealed trauma
@denisdonohue1863
11 ай бұрын
trauma is a vague term. Some women consider trauma to be "I didn't get everything I wanted 100% of the time"
@sykotika13thirteen
11 ай бұрын
This sort of advice is aimed at them. It’s basic esteem building to let them know what you see in them. This advice won’t work with serious psychological or physical trauma. And most that have been through the severe are not interested in dating until they reach a healthy point within themselves
@tylerroe5175
11 ай бұрын
That’s what most women consider trauma 😂
@Andrea-1998
11 ай бұрын
@@tylerroe5175 We don’t, don’t act like billions of humans are spoiled brats. That’s far from the truth.
@tylerroe5175
11 ай бұрын
@@Andrea-1998 Don’t act like just because you’re in the 5% that 95% of women don’t act that way lmao
@hellaspoicey2280
11 ай бұрын
@@sykotika13thirteenI wish that were true
@GTRNights
11 ай бұрын
"But it can be done" Yes, I can also chew broken glass, but I'd rather not.
@VIDS2013
11 ай бұрын
lol...
@psi23k
10 ай бұрын
😂😂😂
@CameronCGreen
10 ай бұрын
🤣🤣🤣
@deangeloj4349
10 ай бұрын
Bingo
@juice_man4439
10 ай бұрын
😂😂
@Aki.akechi
11 ай бұрын
Did this. Still didn’t work. I’m very rational and logical. Supportive and no bs did EXACTLY this. Wasn’t enough, and I wasn’t even upset and didn’t even lash out. She said she didn’t want it. I said fine. That was it. Some people will always self sabotage. And even though you want that person, you can’t force it. They have to want it and also feel the same. So long story short, yes try. But don’t hold on for too long if they aren’t showing the effort👍🏽
@dinardsi9006
11 ай бұрын
Self sabotaging is what avoidant personalities do again and again. I learnt this the hard way - never again!
@benjamindavis2475
10 ай бұрын
Being logical and rational isn't good enough to maintain a relationship. Having a brain is essential but a man with no heart isn't worth fighting for
@Noraa893
10 ай бұрын
WHY DO SAY "Fine". And that's it? WHY? No like I REALLY WANT to understand you.
@Noraa893
10 ай бұрын
And like what do you mean "effort" if you don't even show up to see her yourself? Like, texting? And you did your part or what? The dating game today blows my mind.
@Aki.akechi
10 ай бұрын
@@Noraa893 No in my situation we dated for a year. We even moved in together. But she had unhealed trauma from her past relationships. I didn’t hold it against her at all. I was supportive and only wanted to be a positive in her life. When I finally told her I loved her those traumas came back out and she said she didn’t want this. Her trauma tended from a father that left her in her youth and two very controlling BF’s. I was there for her and even tried being her friend but my heart couldn’t take it. She didn’t want me “out of her life” but she knew she couldn’t “give me what I deserve”. I’m not mad at her I just couldn’t do it any longer. And she even admitted she doesn’t know what love is. Because love in her life was always something toxic. She had to heal. And I wasn’t going to continue to torture myself more by staying and her potentially not wanting me even though i knew she’s all I wanted.
@spamhere1123
11 ай бұрын
Trauma isn't the victim's fault. Refusing to deal with it and using it as an excuse for terrible behavior is.
@milesromo1328
8 ай бұрын
I’m late on this, but this is absolutely true
@kayniki1745
13 күн бұрын
You just described 90% of these people who claim they have "trauma"
@howardmoon1234
11 ай бұрын
The second half of this video is good advice regardless of trauma
@vibrationalcurrency
11 ай бұрын
💯💯
@bulletproof1581
10 ай бұрын
Yeah her answer was to be a decent human being lol, like that's the answer to how every relationship :')
@matthewnikitas8905
11 ай бұрын
Step no. 1. You don’t. Unless you want to waste your time
@legionmeerkat7595
11 ай бұрын
This right here, I didn’t do each of those things she listed step by step but I did go at the girls pace almost every step of the way in virtually all of our day to day things. And even after months, 6 to be exact, there was virtually no progress made. Then when I opened up about my problems that she asked me about.. she left me. Unreal and like ya said a complete waste of time 🤷♂️
@ChinchillaisGod
11 ай бұрын
I can tell you've probably never had any real interactions with women or gotten close to any women. 99% of women have some trauma in their past. If this is your philosophy, you will be single for the rest of your life. If you're fine with that, then great for you, but if you don't want to die alone and refuse to date women with past trauma, then I hope you learn to live with the harsh truth you will die alone.
@slugface322
11 ай бұрын
Don't involve yourself with broken women, period! There's plenty of whole functional women available to men that aren't wimps.
@legionmeerkat7595
11 ай бұрын
@@ChinchillaisGod I think it comes down to what your definition of trauma is tbh
@theriddleofsteel2479
10 ай бұрын
@@legionmeerkat7595I think ChinchillasGod is demonstrating she was traumatized by your comment
@jasongates-
11 ай бұрын
Both sides need to hear this. Men, it's not your job to fix women, and women, it's not your job to fix men. Cause I've heard stories before, where the woman wants to fix the man. Which I've never heard men wanting to do with women. But it's true for both sides. The only person we're to fix is ourselves. If the other person is not even open to being fixed, let alone trying, stay away from them.
@erikbudrow1255
11 ай бұрын
Amen brother. Women love trying to fix narcissistic psychopaths, develop stockholm syndrome, refuse to leave, then wonder why they themselves (and their kids) are losing their minds and are being abused.
@katherinechase3674
11 ай бұрын
.There is actually a term for women who try to hook up with, and change, criminals, serial killers, etc.😮!
@Rivershield
11 ай бұрын
The onligatory "i believe in equality" soy comment
@manfredschmalbach9023
11 ай бұрын
We (men) are not their effing *_projects_* ... Should she start to try altering You for real, pass her on to the next guy. Do not, never ever, even *_think about_* wifeying her up or even give in to any of her tries to change You - she'll dump Your *ss because You became what she ever wanted in the end.
@susanrodriquez3757
11 ай бұрын
I actually disagree with her. Why should a man pick a woman who has had major trauma and the problems that come with it?Dealing with a vvoman who has had trauma and hasn’t fixed it by the time she is dating you is generally not worth it. This is playing on men’s white knight tendencies. This is actually one of the benefits of dating younger vvomen (less baggage and trauma). It’s sad but the reality is the more experiences a vvoman has collected while single, the more messed up and damaged she is likely to become. Vvomen should be getting off the market as quickly as possible, find a good man, and stay with him. The solution is simple but we make it oh so complex in today’s society with feminism, being independent of men and proud of it, and having the fear of missing out as vvomen work in the corporate world with bosses and big businesses that don’t care about them. It’s simply better if men steer clear of vvomen with trauma altogether and find one who has chastity and virtue because she doesn’t have any other experience than to be that way. Most vvomen before they are corrupted are naturally geared to be nurturers and the first progenitors of culture in children (as Kevin Samuels once said). It’s a shame the world destroys that in them as they collect their “experiences”.
@psychojanuus5715
11 ай бұрын
Nahhh, just leave them alone.
@paulmcfeeters5554
11 ай бұрын
No guy ever saw a rabid dog and said "I want to play fetch with her"
@Hordemart3100
10 ай бұрын
What she describes. This isn't a relationship of mutual association. It's a relationship of an independent accepting to take on a dependent! All relationships are work. But you are far more likely to have success having a relationship with another adult. The trauma person she describes isn't an adult.
@fixer1140
10 ай бұрын
"Naah it'll be fine" - the drinker
@Aeackk
10 ай бұрын
How about you dont rely on idiots on the internet to be a voice for our whole gender. Everyone has trauma and when i say everyone i mean everyone. We all have lost something, someone, or gone through something. How about instead of being selfish and narrow minded, you look for someone who you can heal, and they can heal you.
@Hordemart3100
10 ай бұрын
@@Aeackk you are the bad example. Do you not understand how you are by this comment exactly what people don't want in a partner! Your comment is literally a closed loop of hyprocracy!
@tediboy5384
11 ай бұрын
I did it for a year, lived with her, healed her, fixed her, she was obsessed with me. After she got confidence in her she destroyed me psychologically and left. Never calling me again.😅
@AB-ij3im
11 ай бұрын
You didn’t fix her because you can’t. At best, you bandaged her up until she completely fell apart.
@Ry-lx2kl
10 ай бұрын
@@AB-ij3imhe can provide a supportive environment so she can fix herself. When she did hypergamy took over and she rewarded the next guy instead of the guy above.
@trailman20
10 ай бұрын
@@Ry-lx2klfacts
@eyuhyeh
10 ай бұрын
Fr this happened to me after she got "confidence"
@josherving9334
10 ай бұрын
Good thing she’s gone bro !
@dtgamerk9670
11 ай бұрын
If someone is dealing with trauma, chances are near 100% they are dealing with that and won't be emotionally available.
@TheBanjoShowOfficial
11 ай бұрын
I did all of those things you mentioned with my ex and she still left me. Listen, relationships are a two way highway, you give, and you take, both people. After she broke off with me, I realized that I actually had too much to give for someone that gave nearly nothing to me. It really is her loss. But I'm not gonna be in the business of fixing women.
@V.Hansen.
11 ай бұрын
That’s it. Reciprocation
@TheBanjoShowOfficial
11 ай бұрын
@@V.Hansen. I feel the need to be very specific- it's not that the girl was cold to me, she wasn't, she was very nice to me and submissive, but in the end she didn't listen, she never provided anything of value to me, and ended up failing to keep her word. That's what I mean by she gave nearly nothing to me, because she ultimately failed to live up to the expectations we both gave one another. Even girls that seem good, even the ones that seem like keepers, are not necessarily. This was proof of that.
@johnbuckner2200
10 ай бұрын
I have a broken woman, I see the good in her and have slowly been bringing her out of her shell. When you have had a lifetime of hurt it will not happen overnight for her to see that she does not have to fight the trama anymore and she can have a relationship with someone who will not use her and abuse her. In many ways she is a keeper, she created her wall to protect herself from what she has endured. But she is responding positively. She is beautiful inside and out with a hard shell to protect it.
@TheBritishGuy75
10 ай бұрын
She literally said your job is to not fix her.
@Daniel_Roach
11 ай бұрын
The best advice I got about dating women of any age with severe trauma, especially abandonment issues, came from my mother. She always said once you find this out about a girl, fuckin run your ass away.
@MrGatsu
4 ай бұрын
Damn now that’s a good momma right there
@SandraT269
25 күн бұрын
Isn't the world unfair? You got trauma when you were a child just because violent parent and now you won't be able to be a spouse to anyone as an adult because you're traumatized.
@billygrey8087
11 ай бұрын
Yeah I tried dealing with a woman with trauma - never again - I got out of there after a few months. She did the same thing to all the guys after me and drowned them when trying to make them deal with her trauma rather than help herself
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@CreeperG0d
11 ай бұрын
I once heard: "Your own traumas are not your fault, but they are still your responsibility to deal." That goes for both men and women.
@SandraT269
25 күн бұрын
Deal doesn't mean that you'll be completely fixed. Unknown triggers always exist. And you can't know when they attack.
@FarmerKen355
11 ай бұрын
never try to fix someone with more problems than you have....
@Burritoo
10 ай бұрын
I’m dating a woman with trauma & it’s the best relationship I’ve ever been in. She’s a truly amazing person and I absolutely do see a future with her. Don’t write someone off because of others actions.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@ThatsJustLikeYourOpinionMan
11 ай бұрын
Holy crap. This is legit excellent analysis amd advice.
@eternalrage6548
11 ай бұрын
Trust me, it's not. You'll just turn into her coping mechanism. Then everything that goes wrong is your fault. Been there, done that, it's a bad time. Just find a mentally stable person that isn't going to become tyrant at every junction.
@LiberPater777
10 ай бұрын
Not really.
@scheibs556
11 ай бұрын
Not my job. Do not try to rescue someone who is not willing to deal with their baggage. You cant sit their and hope they are willing to do the work on themselves
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@rj9617
11 ай бұрын
That's very good advice, BRB.
@potatoesorsomething
11 ай бұрын
Dating anyone with trauma is difficult lol
@AB-ij3im
11 ай бұрын
But at a certain age, most of us have trauma. The question is whether or not we are doing anything about it.
@mikepiccolo32
11 ай бұрын
@@AB-ij3imbooze and pills seem to be the answer for many
@tristankiddie1710
10 ай бұрын
There isn't a woman my age (40) without "trauma", but the message in this video is pretty close to correct. It's not for us to "fix" things, it is for us to create a space that they can be protected enough to do their own work, and to (as mentioned) inspire them to engage with what gives them spark and helps them know their own power.
@ronaldellis3888
11 ай бұрын
Leave as fast as you can
@Wiznatcharoo
11 ай бұрын
From my experience you truly can’t fix trauma because it’s always used as an excuse for everything
@tymondabrowski12
10 ай бұрын
@@connorhughes1084And men are never using dumb excuses /sarcasm.
@Gomba13
10 ай бұрын
Wow, thanks for the encouragement. You just illustrated perfectly why traumatized folk stay TF away from everyone.
@cliffterrell4876
11 ай бұрын
If her "trauma" is that bad, stay the hell away from her. You will be her next victim causer when she don't get her way.
@fixer1140
10 ай бұрын
If she has traumas, let her dad fix them. Ohh yeah, chances are he's not around...
@tymondabrowski12
10 ай бұрын
@@fixer1140a complete lack of a father figure might be some indication of a broken family system (ideally both parents would take care of theie child, even if they're not together), which can indeed be traumatic for a child.
@SandraT269
25 күн бұрын
@@tymondabrowski12I mean, you can't choose what kind of father you get. You can make him angry if you do something what is wrong and that is completely normal reaction from father, but if he's pure evil and violent and you get trauma because that, you can't do anything for it.
@SandraT269
25 күн бұрын
@@tymondabrowski12Violent fathers are also huge problem, but even if people want to always say over and over again to a child "you'll be fine" or "your mother will help you" or shit like that, it won't help the child. The child can do nothing in that case. If the father abuses, he abuses. Your part is to endure it and accept what you'll be as an adult. You will be empty shell. Nobody wants it.
@sirjohnb404
11 ай бұрын
That’s ludicrous! Leave her alone to fix her self and she should be fixed before looking to start a new relationship.
@sleepingbear9125
11 ай бұрын
Exactly !!
@Fiveash-Art
11 ай бұрын
meh .. nobody is ever 'fixed' ... everyone is screwed up in some way. It makes things interesting.
@Shiroya_Rumika
11 ай бұрын
What if she's dealing with a trauma and needs help? If it's a man you will jump immediately in pity
@SabrinaCarpenterFanAcc
11 ай бұрын
If you were going through something would you want people in your life to abandon you and scorn at you
@klojopipo
11 ай бұрын
@@SabrinaCarpenterFanAccthats exactly how people are..trust nobody
@highclasslinetrash
11 ай бұрын
Don't listen to this boys it's absolutely 1000 percent not worth it find one with less miles
@SandraT269
25 күн бұрын
If a woman have learned to stay away from men and see them as a threat, she wouldn't be even relaxed among them. If you had violent father figure as a little girl, you will see other men as (potential) violent father figures as well.
@thealexandraway
11 ай бұрын
Trauma dumping is just a 🚩unless you're my therapist that's really unhealthy in a romantic relationship.
@starlethearlet237
10 ай бұрын
Jeez, I guess people should be happy all the time
@Aribbonofsoundmen
8 ай бұрын
@@starlethearlet237 you just want to treat you bf badly from time to time and fall back on " it's trauma" 😂
@anetteridleyrodriguez
10 ай бұрын
As someone who has had terrible childhood trauma, my husband has been my rock. He's so patient and understanding, and supportive. He stood by without judgment and let me heal myself .
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@ellisdee2013
11 ай бұрын
Here's a better idea. Unless you want to pay for whatever someone else put her through, let her heal on her own.
@TheStraightestWhitest
10 ай бұрын
She won't heal. If it's a previous guy who caused it, she'll never get over him. Permanently damaged goods. Move on.
@ellisdee2013
10 ай бұрын
@@TheStraightestWhitest there's always an exception to the rule. I think the reason most women don't heal is because they don't take the time to actually work through it alone. There are some diamonds in the rough, but it's like finding a needle in a haystack.
@Ziora_came
11 ай бұрын
She isn’t wrong I’m a woman and when I was a child I was sexually assaulted but now I am on the path to healing and not acting like the victim anymore
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@EddieNanakase
10 ай бұрын
Well, the reality is that we all have problems, we should all be willing to help each other. This includes family, friends, this includes strangers. I mean, I'm not saying to help someone who doesn't appreciates support or doesn't show appreciation for your support. We all need help at some point in our lives, no one is perfect
@NedWasHere94
11 ай бұрын
Wish I had heard this as a kid. Would has prevented me from making other people’s issues my own. Please keep doing what you’re doing.
@rorytrotter7378
11 ай бұрын
This is the best thing you have ever posted!
@annagloster7170
11 ай бұрын
My husband also prompts me to not just sit there dwelling on my emotions by saying "what do you think you can do to fix this?". Sometimes he has good advice when I'm not sure and it puts my mind at rest!
@sarcodonblue2876
11 ай бұрын
Everyone has trauma but most people have no clue and put on on others. The point is that people are helping themselves and so empathy does go a long way.
@peterruane9220
10 ай бұрын
“Trauma dump”: new term for me. concise, to the point
@samanthasmith8301
11 ай бұрын
Whether it's a man or a woman, if they don't want to become a better version of themselves, then there's nothing anyone can do. For the most part, it's best to stay away from these sorts of people. Life is already hard as it is and far too short for other people's nonsense.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@mikey92362
11 ай бұрын
Nope! Hard pass. Her trauma just becomes your trauma. And everything will be a contest with her. Have a bad day? Oh she'll be sure to let you know your problems are nothing compared to hers. 2 rules every guy should live by: Rule #1: Never start a relationship with a girl who has trauma. Rule #2: Real or not, they ALL have trauma.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@bastidface
11 ай бұрын
Too much trouble.
@user-tx1ww8lm1m
10 ай бұрын
If you are looking for long term commitment, don't bother with a currently broken woman. 1. She will remain broken. 2. She will heal and move on, without you.
@Lord-Of-Light
10 ай бұрын
As someone who has been thru this relationship, it is not worth it. If he or she is broken, run. There are plenty of healthy people out there, don’t put yourself thru there problems, it’s not worth it.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@TheVideoStoreGuy
11 ай бұрын
A man with options and who displays self-love will not settle for drama. Sometimes… often, you need to burn yourself to understand how much drama is not worth it. Go where it is easy. Don’t ride against, but with the waves 🌊
@d.j.zumalt4393
11 ай бұрын
I like how naturally pretty you are. You're rocking that look really well.
@MarkaNgamer
11 ай бұрын
It's genetics lol
@chrisruth7057
10 ай бұрын
@@MarkaNgamerBRB is hot & she bigtime knows it + also acts it = narcissism
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@gnerd07
10 ай бұрын
Solid advice. Ppl aren't perfect. Compromise is natural but if you feel weighed down by it then walk away. Will only get worse in the long run
@garrettlake4181
11 ай бұрын
Love the natural face! Such a wise women too. Keep up the great vids!
@Bubinsky2000
11 ай бұрын
I feel like my husband intuitively did this with me - he’s a wonderful man :-) Hard working, has firm morals, flipping handsome… I’m a lucky woman.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@beat89widmer26
11 ай бұрын
Very solid advice, thank you:))
@richardpatureau3980
11 ай бұрын
I’m so glad I’m an old man and don’t have to deal with shit like this.
@AB-ij3im
11 ай бұрын
I’m the woman in this scenario right now and I am so grateful my man has been willing to stick by me while I work on myself!!
@oddoutdoors
11 ай бұрын
Heres a tip. It won't work. Ever. Do not date. Run.
@dsolomon
11 ай бұрын
She can work out her trauma with someone else. Nobody is flawless, but I don’t want to deal with a deeply scarred woman on a daily basis.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@DanDan-mm8om
10 ай бұрын
What she says is accurate. If she is working on her self but still being with you. Your job is to find what triggers her for the trauma and take steps to minimize the moments you may cause. And also guys be consistent on what person you are.
@imnotyourunicorn91
10 ай бұрын
My man has used this method. It is true that I had a ton of walls up. I hardly bare my true self to anyone as I feel used, uncomfortable & unwanted around others. He appreciates my good traits and points out anything that I am doing correctly. He is a rarity. I'm glad I found him.
@lucidjamesofficial
11 ай бұрын
To any woman that read this don't date the bad boys and the gangsters!!! They're just gonna use you as a sex toy and dispose of you when they're bored of you. Now I shouldn't be hearing any more stories of trauma In relationships
@erikbudrow1255
11 ай бұрын
That would be great in theory. Thing is, one of the base functions women have in human evolution is to act as the gate keepers for a majority of the most important traits that humans need to continue as a species. The most important traits of which are not being good and nice...they are grit, pragmatic intelligence, and the ability to get what they want, all three of which bad boys and "gangstas" tend to have. If you're a good and nice guy, you're going to have to develop those other three traits in order to become appealing and have better survival stats than those bad boys you mentioned.
@annihilator_production
11 ай бұрын
@@erikbudrow1255don't put pink in crap, you would hire a gangster in an artistic project just because they have artistic talents? Hell nah same thing (i might even say ) it's More important in relationships the hell do i care if he has those traits stay away from those persons.
@iggiryjoff
11 ай бұрын
@@annihilator_productionits a pro-feminist or a woman under man's nickname
@annihilator_production
11 ай бұрын
@@iggiryjoff hmmmmm interesting theory,
@lucidjamesofficial
11 ай бұрын
Yall trauma is self-inflicted. You dated the bad boys, no one told you to. That was your choice, and then you cry about it and play the victim.
@cliffterrell4876
11 ай бұрын
Agree 100%
@user-yb3ch6uc1y
10 ай бұрын
God this is so spot on. As a traumatized woman. This is so cathartic 😭
@ambamsrathegigantic
11 ай бұрын
Gr8 advice
@kennethdashensheridan
11 ай бұрын
Military wisdom: Never pet a burning dog Don’t pretend to like things she likes like some weak spineless teenager. Don’t motivate her to do a damn thing, she needs to be together and confident already…don’t fix her….you will fail. Don’t try and “figure her out”….you’ll go crazy. I normally like these videos, but this one missed the mark. Like if we were firing weapons at the range, this would be the equivalent of hitting someone else’s target …. on the next range over 😂 Don’t ever talk to her about her past trauma, she will tell you the version she wants you to know. Just don’t do it. Her “trauma” is most likely a series of mistakes she refuses to except accountability for so she just chalks it up to “my trauma” Stay away, and don’t fall for that shit. Don’t be her counselor or her friend. She has friends for that. You (talking to the men here) need to massively improve your financial situation, and get healthy with physical training. Stop using estrogenic products (sunscreen, sulfates etc…) Stay hard 💪🏾 And NEVER put the woman first, you have to put yourself first and she must want you more than you want her or she’ll get bored. She doesn’t need to know all the details of your life…and you don’t need to be her therapist. Don’t ever be with a traumatized woman - unless you want to risk being falsely accused of things like be abusing, or forcing her to have intercourse against her will bc she really didn’t want to. Trauma. No fellas. Learn a payable skill. Get jacked. Move up a few tax brackets and create a legacy that people will WANT to be part of. Never pet a burning dog
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@benjamindavis2475
10 ай бұрын
This reply comes off as you being scared to commit and only interested in protecting yourself. That's not a bad thing. But its not the attitude of someone ready for a serious relationship
@johnathandoyle2662
11 ай бұрын
I'm currently in this situation and it's becoming more and more unbearable
@michaelangst6078
11 ай бұрын
If it hasn't gotten better, reality is she is not satisfied with you and she doesn't care if you leave..
@delias17
9 ай бұрын
I don’t comment often, but I felt the need to here. My ex had an absurd amount of trauma and baggage no human should ever endure. I knew my job was not to fix her, but to encourage and promote her good/healthy behaviors and hobbies. Long story short, stay clear from these people. The wiring of their brains changes significantly. They’ll end up destroying you, no matter how much you help them. Hurt people hurt people. It’s best to steer clear, as hard as it may be.
@james50227
11 ай бұрын
Love is a choice more than it is a feeling. I miss the feeling of love.
@JoseEduardo1594-
10 ай бұрын
Doing those thing is still trying to fix though right? The biggest thing is to stay away and let them process whatever they are naturally. A relationship is about the long run, not the sprints. you have to learn to separate what a person is going through from who they are. Have compassion on them, just as you do so on yourself. That’s key 🔑
@4manbands
10 ай бұрын
As a guy who is going through this, she is actually 100% right.🙌🏾
@synapticfreeze2189
10 ай бұрын
Nailed it! I had to find these things out on my own and I got a wonderful wife in the process.
@janthonydrivenpatien
11 ай бұрын
How did you become so respectful, accountable, and feminine? This is humanity, besides being empathetic. You are complete selfless. You are unique. That is ultimate attractive.
@daeocdomren9471
11 ай бұрын
Every now and then I see a clip that should be required watching. This is one of them. Thank you for pointing out they need to be working on fixing themselves and that the relationship can still work out if that is the case.
@kevinburroughs3826
10 ай бұрын
This lady has it correct. Very wise for her age. Well said.
@alexbryer490
Ай бұрын
That sounds like the best relationship advice I ever heard
@livly9
10 ай бұрын
I needed this video 10 years ago
@Gulag-bardak
10 ай бұрын
Damn, that really makes sense, thank you
@legionmeerkat7595
11 ай бұрын
I didn’t do each of those things she listed step by step but I did go at the (trauma) girls pace almost every step of the way in virtually all of our day to day things together. I attempted to be helpful in moments where she was busy, even just washing dishes, cleaning the microwave and little things like that to show I wanted to support her and make her life easier no matter what. But even after months, 6 to be exact, there was virtually no progress made. Then when I opened up about my problems that she asked me about and wanted me to do so…she left me. Unreal feeling and a complete waste of time 🤷♂️
@AlmaSoul305
11 ай бұрын
I thoroughly enjoy all of your shorts that I've seen(like 10) you're wise and seem like a great friend to have, hope things continue to go well for you
@lococardcollector7901
11 ай бұрын
This is one of your best videos yet
@Ida-do9ze
11 ай бұрын
I agree with that. Same goes for dating men with trauma. Unfortunately, the vast majority of people today deal with some sort of trauma, regardless of sex. Compassion goes a long way as long as you don't jeopardize yourself.
@chevaliergryphon1308
2 ай бұрын
Ask her what you can do to support her reaching her goals for herself. My wife is an animal lover with a job in the field. In working at a non-profit animal shelter she lives her dream. It means I have to be mindful of foster kitten season. She asked me to build shelving for her many kitten kennels to better care for them. Sometimes I have to have boundaries...I don't give care to the fosters because that is part of her job. But letting her live her best life our life together is enriched
@Bexar2204
10 ай бұрын
I´ve learned this lesson the hard way... 3 years after break up, I still struggle with depression from busting my ass mentally, and completely forgetting myself for 7½years
@shawnkelly5419
11 ай бұрын
It can not be done. Every time she opens up, she shuts down.
@jeffreycedeno3271
9 ай бұрын
I’ve seen this girl say a lot of nonsense in the past, but this is actually solid advice 👍🏾
@tommcgrath8977
11 ай бұрын
My partner had a physical trauma in her past that she repressed for years. When it bubbled up, she actually had a fear of men & touch. My therapist kept telling me "it has nothing to do with you" which took me FOREVER to even BEGIN to understand. It's so difficult to be patient & working on understanding when it seems like you are the one suffering some of the consequences of the issue.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@tommcgrath8977
9 ай бұрын
@@LaurenE135Thank you! Yes, still with her (43 years) and will discuss this with her.
@Lodatzor
10 ай бұрын
My partner has a high amount of past trauma. I can confirm that this advice is absolutely spot on.
@michaelt1545
10 ай бұрын
Just got out of a relationship with a girl who had trauma. Her trauma was pretty rough. She never wanted to fix herself so I eventually cut ties with her. I also realized that while I was trying to support her and encourage her, my mental health was declining. As messed up as this sounds, I feel so much happier now that I am not with her anymore.
@meeplymoon8391
9 ай бұрын
I love this video. I needed this, thanks.
@GabrielRodriguez-um8fi
2 ай бұрын
That is true. If she doesn’t respond back or does not tear down those walls, I don’t recommend that kind of relationship
@applesaucelicker2600
11 ай бұрын
"But it can be done!😃" yea by walking away and not dealing with it
@mochie1306
11 ай бұрын
Most people don't take the time to fix themselves, instead blames others for their issues.
@danpierce8862
11 ай бұрын
I dont believe in "the friend zone" because i stop persuing people when they percieve me like that. I stop talking to them altogether.
@ArnoldsDesign
8 ай бұрын
I dated a woman once who had been abused by her alcoholic father as a child. We dated about a year. I wanted it to continue, but the behavior became so self destructive to the relationship that I finally couldn't deal with it anymore, and left. She had seen different psychologists about her trauma over the years, but some childhood scars run very deep, and I don't think they can be worked out tbh.
@isaiahbarrett9451
11 ай бұрын
That’s some solid game right there !
@cnordegren
7 ай бұрын
You were awesome in Lady Ballers! 👌👌👌
@spadeghostvampire7777
11 ай бұрын
So be random and crazy, with compliments in everything in humor. Got it.
@JoseDiaz-rd9fh
11 ай бұрын
This is why having discipline is so important. It will give you clarity when she plugs into your frame you observe how she acts within it over time. Damaged women cannot handle a consistent reliable man. It will put too much pressure on them to better themselves and they will purposely self-sabotage the relationship. This is not a matter of how much good you have inside or how good a man you are. You can never be enough for the wrong person but if you are undisciplined you will let these kind of women stick around and cause major damage.
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@nwinburn
11 ай бұрын
I wish I had seen this three months ago. I've been doing what you said last, and she has done exactly what you said she'd do!
@55maranatha
10 ай бұрын
Hello. Just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you very much. He is coming back very soon and He wants you to be ready. Just go to Him as you are. You don’t have to be perfect. The only thing He requires is a full surrender of your life. Go to Him and give Him your life and everything. Once you surrender everything (from the heart). He will give you The Holy Spirit in His fullness. The Holy Spirit will then give you faith, the power to overcome sin, peace, fulfillment and above all, eternal life. You cannot do it on your own strength. It’s only by the Holy Spirit. And you get The Holy Spirit once you lay everything down, including your life at The Lord’s feet. He says in His Word “Not by might, not by power but by my Spirit”. People think Christianity is boring. That’s because they see it as a religion. Christianity is not a religion, but a personal relationship with Jesus Christ who loves you and gave Himself for you. Having a relationship with Christ is the most joyful fulfilling thing you can ever have. Jesus changed my life and He wants to change yours as well. The reason we are all here is to fellowship with and have a relationship with God.
@tgrei4701
10 ай бұрын
My ex was dealing with heavy trauma and it was extremely difficult to be that strong support. It was too much for both of us in the end but the lessons gained were invaluable
@ericwilliams68
11 ай бұрын
Thank you for this. I wish… wish I had this advice 10 years ago.
@KnicksNYanks84
10 ай бұрын
everyone has trauma, weak people succumb, strong people surrender
@kittell6486
10 ай бұрын
I did just that. Best thing I ever did. So far, it's been 1/3 century of wedded bliss.
@Christian_Bagger
11 ай бұрын
No one can fix anyone. And you don’t want to. Your problems and fixing them is your life. It’s a gift to learn, that you are capable of dealing with the darkest parts the world has to offer. You don’t want to take that away from anyone. Don’t fix people.
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