"Some men only clean when other people are coming over, because those people deserve cleanliness" Hey don't call me out like that man
@j.p.l1237
Жыл бұрын
Right in the feels
@GuyDudeman97
7 ай бұрын
Dont feel called out, feel inspired to do better for yourself, you deserve it
@TheSaival
7 ай бұрын
literally me. I can go without cleaning and housekeeping for a month or two but if somebody (especially if its a female) is coming over the house is gonna be fxcking spotless, with me spending around 10-12 hours on cleaning all that mess up.
@Nerobyrne
6 ай бұрын
this is actually quite common for people with untreated ADHD, because every action takes an "action point", and when you start the day with half of them anyway, then you're not gonna bother picking up that empty can on your floor unless it's actually important. And since you put it there, and only you see it, it's not that important. Sure, you'd like it not be there, but actually picking it up takes more mental energy than living with a can on the floor. Obviously, the take-away here shouldn't be "oh lol that's just my disability!" it should be "wow, that means that there is a solution? AWESOME!"
@j.2512
4 ай бұрын
no, thats just being lazy and not wanting others to find out
@Madimonster64
2 жыл бұрын
"To become based, one must embrace their own cringe." - Sun Tzu, Art of War
@henriquefinger935
Жыл бұрын
"Kill not the part of you that is cringe, kill that part that cringes." - Siddhartha Gautama
@jaspermooren5883
10 ай бұрын
I'm just imagining people in 50 years legit thinking these are actual quotes.
@EdBurke37
2 жыл бұрын
The greatest gift my father ever gave me was permission to cry. He never shamed me for it, never told me I was wrong to express my emotions. When I fell and hurt myself it was ok to cry. When we had to put our dog to sleep he gave me a massive hug and let me cry all I needed. I even watched him weep as he delivered one of the prayers at my grandmothers funeral. My maternal grandmother. He loved her so much that even though she didn't raise him this massive mountain of a man, a walking stereotype of a lumberjack of a man openly crying in front of everyone and never once trying to hide it. He is the strongest person I know and I would not be here without him.
@zetsugp8192
2 жыл бұрын
Stop flexing with healthy relationships
@goosewithagibus
Жыл бұрын
I wish I had your father. The norm in my house was to be emotionally and physically punished for any expression of emotion or personality.
@NIL0S
2 жыл бұрын
My full guide to being a human: 1. become your own person 2. pursue virtue (learn what yours is) 3. leave stuff better than how you found it 4. help others be a human
@Cbawls
2 жыл бұрын
As a Christian, mine would be: 1. Search God earnestly 2. Revelation of who He is and the nature of yourself 3. Turn from your human nature at the revelation of Jesus 4. Discover your identity as a child of God as you learn to love him as a father 5. Helping others and serving him rather than your own happiness is part of this identity Just my two cents. Felt like sharing.
@mokie7421
2 жыл бұрын
@@Cbawls You find homosexuality abhorrent and sinful as a christian, yet you praise a grown man, on your knees. Curious....
@ChuckSneedly
2 жыл бұрын
@@mokie7421 Christ loves everyone. Please don't take people who have taken something beautiful and corrupted for their own egoic ends as a point of reference when speaking about the teaching of Christ. Thanks, and blessings upon ye :3
@mokie7421
2 жыл бұрын
@@ChuckSneedly ok :D
@iKingOf
2 жыл бұрын
@UrsineAutist This is probably the only positive and dare I say wholesome interaction with a Christian I've seen online in months. Your wording is gentle and your message is positive. I do not know you well enough to make a true judgment of character but from what I have witnessed here today, although just one message. I see kindness in you, this does bring a smile to my face. The world needs more christians like you, God bless you.
@mrmeow2297
2 жыл бұрын
Very important topic. I feel like in today's world men are kind of being neglected with their issues. You'd be surprised how many "friends" got rid of me when I had some issues. A dating book I once read said "You're a man. nobody gives a f*ck about your problems. You pay a therapist or someone who can fix your issues but forget telling others about your problems, especially your girlfriend or she won't be your girlfriend for much longer."
@marocat4749
2 жыл бұрын
Thats complicated, because anytime tha would be relevant toxic incls and blame the women dudes come up and are the worst instead adressing that . Great representation! But yeah it needs adressed too, and even wore the discourse is incredibly poioned by that aholes that it gets dismied by association a lot. I hope people find a girlfriend or boyfriend that arent that superficial but are supportive. Because i am sure, they exist, ,just really everyone needs to learn to be mor sensitive, and men learn to learn to lean their emotional butden healthy over friends instee being needy as result by not learning.. which is also th fault.... I mean the whole dialogue is incredible poisoned and continue to be so, by a liud minrity that ar aholes and tolerated more than "men" and that , yeah most women i think arent but there also annoying , feminism is poisoned too, took at terfs. I dont mean that a blame on anyone, just its so poisened as discourse , and ther is a lot of weird expectations that are kinda reverse sexim about , and worst, people are on the internet usually and social media make the worst the loudest. Ok that datin book, is not helpful. A lot of guys leave their girlfriend of they have i imagine. Its just to generalizing. Its because the worst people from both sides poison that dialogue with. And yeah i get women can easy have experince that makes them on guard because. It complicated and poisoned, and yes we need to llearn to talk about that as nuance to not fal in reverse rassism(and condemn that aholes that poison it in the first place and dont care untill they do) And friends, i think thats not a men thing nessesary, i get you feel alone. Find better friends? Kow the friends you still have and stay by your side? I iknow its rough but that can deepen the good friends?! And the self reliance, youprobable understandingly feel bad and that things can be very rough, you have to force yourself to learn to at least tolerat ourself and show compassion, and its rough. And hat to say it but it gets better if you work on that which is, and you can share better with the friends you know that wont abadon you for it. Also yeah the men and women that just treat mn and women as lesser , no men are argumently mor vunerable in that soituations, ad sure woen and partners shoulsnr be therapits, but yeah that should be way more precalnt that men are vunerable too, an thats ok. (And both zealot loud minority femisists and toxic dudes are shaming and attacking that) Good wishes .
@TheBurgerkrieg
2 жыл бұрын
this has not been my personal experience, many of my friends and partners have been very supportive, but I realise it is this was for many guys
@mrmeow2297
2 жыл бұрын
@@TheBurgerkrieg good for you brother but its okay I learned to deal with this
@g.lether7973
2 жыл бұрын
What’s the name of the dating book?
@andrestomas2366
2 жыл бұрын
@@g.lether7973 he may come around and send it😂 people do get busy.
@OneEyeShadow
2 жыл бұрын
Burger: "First point: self reliance" Alright, I got this Burger: "By which I mean self love and self esteem [...] no matter who you are" Well fuck
@venepskeuten9206
Жыл бұрын
Haha unrelenting self denial goes brrrrrrrrr
@borgshadow13
Жыл бұрын
go full circle on self hatred, turn that passion into self-care; sith style.
@joedan5366
Жыл бұрын
Republican male here self love and self esteem are important, but you should recognized that this love shouldn't come from self but from being made in the image of God Not like having a second person with you just don't beat yourself up I am all for stoicism, but you can't internalize all emotions forever or you will be miserable you need to vent to tell other people about this which is what marriage does
@skahg4771
Жыл бұрын
@@joedan5366 you should have said "boomer conservative evangelical here" because "republican" doesn't quite do it. Hasn't the religious right realized yet that the rest of the world isn't interested in their proselytizing? You are offering the most empty, nothing advice ever, that every person in America has heard at one point or another. Just try to be like god, believe and it'll all be okay. what a weak minded way to look at the world. too afraid to face the cold reality we live in, so you comfort yourself with the lies our ancestors told themselves. how brave and forward thinking of you. There's nothing more dangerous than a comfortable lie that allows people to live like closed minded zealots who think they are absolutely right all the time.
@joedan5366
Жыл бұрын
@@skahg4771 Bro I can't force you, or the world to do what I want. I was just giving my opinion that this video I agree with in part but not all P.S I know I am not right all the time hence why I am listening to burger. I am trying to understand his argument, and where he has valid points. In religious context I have heard counter arguments, and I am convinced logically that science confirms the Bible. Hence why I am currently in college to become a pastor.
@DigiThorn
2 жыл бұрын
Jokes on you! I’m pretty confident in my masculinity, I’m was just curious on what you have to say on the subject, so Ha!
@andrestomas2366
2 жыл бұрын
Not gonna lie, same. Was a good talk and took some stuff away from it I wouldn’t have otherwise.
@koh123453
2 жыл бұрын
It’s refreshing to hear a person speak rather eloquently about things I’ve been thinking and feeling for a long time. You’re an oasis in the desert of lectures on this subject.
@freshhands9461
Жыл бұрын
This video should be mandatory in school. Personal sidenote: A beautiful but also sad irony, that being a manly man is, by their own definition even, the least manly thing you can be. All you'll achieve is becoming a slave to other people's insecurities. Don't be a slave. Own Yourself.
@slowrunn3r88
Жыл бұрын
A “real man” must constantly analyze “would a man do this? A man doesn’t do this, I cannot do this” A real man must stop doing things he enjoys without permission from other men A real man must do things he hates, to impress men A real man must live only for shallow people. He doesn’t think for himself or live on his own terms
@gundamkaizer6947
Жыл бұрын
Something that helps me cry when I need to as a man, is to listen to sad or nostalgic music. Even stuff like superhero music can give that kind of "you're safe now, I'm gonna protect you, it's okay to be vulnerable and just let it all out" sorts of feelings.
@Pro_K.R.
Жыл бұрын
That sounds like awesome advice! I might try that
@christopher8530
2 жыл бұрын
HELL YEAH BRROTHERRR, THANKS FOR THE GUIDE! LET'S HELP EACHOTHER CRANK OUR HOGS!!1!
@masscreationbroadcasts
2 жыл бұрын
I do not want to Google what that means.
@christopher8530
2 жыл бұрын
IT MEANS HELPING EACHOTHER WITH BOMBASS MEMES BROTHER
@Vitlaus
2 жыл бұрын
On days I wanted to quit my job, I used Gnome’s “Father of Time” album to get me there. 🎸
@cosmiccynic2757
2 жыл бұрын
I've always had some reservations about the label "feminist". There are some self-described feminists whom I agree with 99% of the time, there are also some whom I disagree on almost everything. I tend to dislike the way some feminists discuss male issues. They often do it in a victim blaming way. Blaming men for toxic masculinity is ignoring the way society imposes toxic masculinity on men and boys. It is almost like blaming individual people for a systemic problem. Because of these reasons, I prefer to think of my self as a gender egalitarian.
@tzimiscelord8483
2 жыл бұрын
Because everything you need to know about allot of them is right on the cover. They only care about women
@cosmiccynic2757
2 жыл бұрын
@@tzimiscelord8483 There are definitely feminists who do care about men. But mainstream feminism is primarily focused on women's issues.
@nempatriarch
2 жыл бұрын
@@cosmiccynic2757 Which is very reasonable, as stated in the video
@jambott5520
2 жыл бұрын
@@tzimiscelord8483 As the guy in the video said, one of the core tennants of feminist theory is that the patriarchy, a system that overall helps men, giving them more power and status, also very significantly hurts men. That one of the first acts the patriarchy demands of men is an act of emotional self mutilation, an act that allows men to perform patriarchal acts on women, and other men. That allows them to perpetuate the patriarchy.
@WhoDaresWinso7
2 жыл бұрын
@@cosmiccynic2757 society*
@skyeguy7914
2 жыл бұрын
There was an extremely long period of time where I couldn’t cry. Even when I saw things or experienced things that made me want to cry, I just couldn’t. I thought there was something medically wrong with me, until one day. I was put into a state of extreme emotional distress by my boss. I quite literally broke down, huddled into the fetal position, and cried profusely with no capacity to stop or regain control of myself. Ever since that day, the rest of my coworkers avoided me like the plague. It was at that moment that I realized an experience like that is extremely unhealthy. Since then I’ve been much more in tune with my emotions, but that is the kind of state these expectation on the emotional state of men can do to said men.
@slowrunn3r88
Жыл бұрын
It’s ridiculous that men literally aren’t allowed to; even the people who say “men should cry and show emotions!!!” They don’t…. Truly mean it I don’t think they’re even consciously being shallow and sexist, it’s just like this weird discomfort they feel, unsure of what to do or how to handle it. I’m a very emotional person, and over the last 3 years or so, I’ve gotten pretty aggressive with “I talk about my feelings, take it or leave it.” I’ve become a lot more “manly” ever since I allowed myself the right to feel, because it’s allowed me to be more in tune with how I’m truly feeling, clears my head more, instead of trying to overthink “is… is it okay if I feel this way…? What would a real man do in this situation….?” Nope, I just do what feels right for me, and that’s that
@iExploder
Жыл бұрын
I don't know if it's the meds or something else, but I also have trouble crying. It leaks out from time to time, a tear or two at a random moment when I'm all alone, but it's been years since I've been able to have a good cry, even if my emotional state demands it.
@mic6412
2 жыл бұрын
I am a teen girl. And my boyfriend sent me this video. (I don’t know if he goes through comments like I do to see other peoples views but if he does, he will recognize this is me, I love you) I know that men have a very hard time with patriarchy. I never knew the words to describe how much and why men were struggling. Thanks to this video I do. And as I am watching this I can’t help but think , have I been doing my part with my own relationships? When I tell a man “It’s okay to cry” or “I won’t judge you for your emotions” and actively asking about their day and if they are okay comes off as manipulative? Am I actually doing something wrong? I always thought I was , well helping them to feel more comfortable with me and in the long run having an easier time showing their emotions. I genuinely recognize that men struggle and I genuinely want to help. But I am afraid I am doing the exact opposite. As I have experience with thinking I was helping someone when it turns out I was hurting them. I would really love to others opinion on this.Anyways I will watch the other half of the video now. And come back to finish this. Edit 1: 49:40 this hits hard as I ,mostly thanks to my ideology of always being the one to hold everything together and making everyone happy, had a hard time expressing my problems, sadness and general anger. Because as a person how could I , knowing that me expressing my sadness and problems might and would (in my mind) hurt them , even share it ? As it would be ,at least in mind, hurting the person I care and love . And that would be wrong . I am still working towards the very wonky line of sharing my emotions , where one one side it’s too much that I become dependent on the person for everything and on the other not sharing at all to only show my happy side even if it ends up hurting me. Finding the balance is important. Final Edit: I believe this video was very well done. It gave me the perspective I could never had as a woman. And even tho it was mainly about men and the troubles they face . I ended up relating and learning a lot from it. Like in the end you said , it is about being a good human. Thank you for this video . It made me chuckle and it made me want to cry and in the most weird way it made me feel closer to my boyfriend. Thank you for this amazing video. I will be following your channel from now on!
@xiaogao5159
2 жыл бұрын
This was very nice. I would reply not to take too much credit for hurting people especially as a young person. Even if you made a mistake it's more of a systemic problem than any one person. I don't trust people with my feelings because of interactions with everybody including but not limited to my parents. who I hope didn't realize that they were training me to never discuss personal topics with them ever as an adult. before my father died. in moment of opening up with him about romantic relationship problems and how hopeless I felt about it. He completely straight faced and I assume with the best of intentions told me to just get a prostitute and then he died a few days later. I'm mostly confused at how he thought that would solve anything. Man advice for guys is pretty bad and pretty toxic. and that's without some agenda involved by the advisor. If I had to blame somebody as an adult for how I feel the last people on that list would be other teenagers also figuring out the world that I dated as a teenager.. just try your best thats all anybody can do.
@mic6412
2 жыл бұрын
@@xiaogao5159 thank you so much for this response!!
@georgekomarov4140
2 жыл бұрын
It's so sweet of you! I'm almost envious of your boyfriend (in a good way). But I wanna double down on the advice above: please don't be harsh to yourself. Even if you made some mistakes, who the hell doesn't? I'm 32 y. o. man, and I still do stupid shit, and I cringe about stupid shit I've done when I was your age. It's normal, especially if you meant well. Think of your effort to offer people kindness as a gift. Would you be angry, or frustrated, or suspicious if someone gave you a genuine gift, but it's of different color or brand from one you wanted? I guess you would still appreciate it: the gift is a gift. So people who deserve that gift will appreciate it too, and those who don't... well, fuck them. Please stay as nice, thoughtful, and understanding as you are.
@noway8259
Жыл бұрын
I don't think your being manipulative in the negative sense, persuasive towards self help maybe?
@blakeoarmboy
2 жыл бұрын
45:30 Hate not the part of you that's cringe, hate the part that cringes - Sun Tzu(Probably)
@JukeBoxHead
2 жыл бұрын
Clavicus Vile is the prince on their own. Barbas is a daedra containing a hunk of his power similar to a daedric artifact, but more powerful.
@nstyhl
2 жыл бұрын
The US army has ironically produced the most stereotypical men while also turning them into everything you described here. I've spent countless nights on guard listening/ sharing to my brothers and seeing acceptance of everyone's personal passion. I've seen grown men walk through hell and pull off miracles, but cry when talking about lost friends or missing home. That Male space the Infantry provides kept us mentally and emotionally healthy. And yeah female soldiers were welcome as long as they weren't there to disrupt the space. Its something about already having to trust people who you don't really like with your life that tends to open up to emotional trust too. It's why veterans talk so much about missing being in, while still bitching about all the bs that made them get out.
@anthonygurskas4850
2 жыл бұрын
Don't wear sunglasses. Stare directly into the sun. Be a man.
@yenziwemotha3049
2 жыл бұрын
In my own experience I have realised that some women are fundamentally incapable of processing a man's emotions and some cases they are disgusted by them. I remember two occasions where I became vulnerable to some of the closest females in my life and I got burned so badly, I vowed not to do that again, and now I have only cried twice in the span of 9 years
@Mikolaj1334
Жыл бұрын
Same. One of my female friends, when we was arguing on 'today man's problems', in emotions said "I HATE WEAK MAN! THEY DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE!" Now i know this is part of her biology... Still hurts... (She was first person that seen me crying - not mentioning family - and was so overwhelmed that she can only look at me with these big eyes and nervously holding pillow xD i was comfortable around her so i was thinking is ok. for me to cry... I was kinda wrong. But now i think she sees less like 'meat'machine'with'd*ck'. But this is only one girl) But i think the problem is that most of them are not that Independent where it comes to biological sides than they want to be seen. Same as we. Understanding this on both sides can only bring relief.
@nope5657
11 ай бұрын
This is, quite simply, very true. It amazes me looking back at the relationships of my parents, older siblings, family etc and seeing just how common a problem women utterly dismissing and not knowing how to process a man's emotions really is. Yeah yeah anecdotal blah blah but like, so what? My dad was in many ways the typical stoic father type. He wasn't cold or uncaring, just reserved. My mother...let's just say was A LOT. Any time my dad ever decided to speak, which was RARE AS FUCK, he was INSTANTLY shut down and invalidated by my mom. Their arguments would just kinda go in circles and stall out with my mom getting her way. Granted my family is a fucking MESS of narcissism and I'm not letting my dad off the hook at all, but the dynamic was very real. He learned very early to coddle my mother and never challenge her emotions and give her what she wants. My sister? Fuck me is she AWFUL to the men in her life. She's the very definition of "feel turned off and disgusted at male vulnerability" type of person. I literally nerd her, verFUCKINGbatim, say "man up!" and "quite whining!" to one particular BF.
@j.2512
4 ай бұрын
there's nothing a woman hates more than an emasculated male. If you show emotion that for them is female behaviour and in their eyes makes you weak. They are repulsed by that, viscerally disgusted. They will never respect you again .
@j.2512
4 ай бұрын
@@nope5657 modern females live a life of priviledge, entitlement and leisure thats all brought forth and supported by male suferring which they take completely for granted, When men as a whole learn to stop simping and giving females special treatment then they'll truly know how unfit for life they are and how fucked they are by themselves.
@MySqueezingArm
2 жыл бұрын
38:00 Man I wish I could cry twice a year, instead I get the weird pressure tears that just leak out every now and again.
@chrismorel8613
2 жыл бұрын
Like completely randomly?!? Say when reading comics or books, maybe when listening to music? (Or replying to an old KZitem comment...) And if someone suddenly appeared and pressed you as to why all you could answer is"weeeeel, this was last thing I read/listened to was.... But THAT can't be it"
@MySqueezingArm
2 жыл бұрын
@@chrismorel8613 Nah it's more like just repressed emotions bubbling up in times of stress or whatever. When I'm overthinking something, typically while driving.
@SpookyTimestamps
2 жыл бұрын
Same. Last time I cried was the loss of a family member a few years ago. It’s not a good thing at all.
@Sketchy_2
Жыл бұрын
@@SpookyTimestamps I didn't even cry when multiple family members died the same year. yikes I'm screwed in the head.
@matturner6890
Жыл бұрын
@@Sketchy_2 Some people just ruminate instead of crying. Don't beat yourself up over it. When you're meant to cry again, it'll happen.
@jambott5520
2 жыл бұрын
While autism is probably overall a bad thing, my experience of it (and the particular way I was raised, being raised by an unstoppable force and an immovable object, so I came out rather stubborn) in terms of masculinity is good. I always found myself detatched from gender. I saw the pressures people, even as kids in like year 2, putting the pressures of performing their gender roles on themselves. Not just from other people, I had to deal with that, I just ignored it and kept being emotional, but I saw in real time other people mutilating that part of themselves. It was really sad. At one point I really tried to be normal, tried to conform to societies standards of men, but I just couldnt. There are so, so many stupid rules, so many stupid expectations, and trying to conform to them did not help with that, it meant that you had more pressure to conform as time goes on. It was a dreadful time, not just for the blatantly stupid rules, but because unkowningly I was trans and still am trans, and while my issues are mostly bodily issues, I dont care about gender I care about not having titty, I dont think I am completely immune to gender and it would have absolutely made that time worse. At some point after learning how to speak propper english, learning all the rules of how a man should act, I just dropped it all. It was stupid, and I would only keep learning the rules so I could dismiss them. Still hold by this. Crying is underrated, and so is expressing your emotions. People generally also respond positively to just being open and yourself. I have definitely been lucky with those around me, but I dont think I would have been able to grasp that luck and start the relationships if I was trying to be someone else.
@j.2512
4 ай бұрын
well yeah, autism is a form of mental retardation, that will set you back a lot
@femboisterous_bigit
2 жыл бұрын
really channeling the Atun-Shei in the opening
@voxlknight2155
2 жыл бұрын
Stoicism really helped me. I'll leave it at that. And I don't mean the bullshit modern meaning of the word, I mean the philosophy.
@j.2512
4 ай бұрын
stoicism is just being the ultimate conformist
@RaVNeFLoK
Жыл бұрын
As a clinical psychologist working with a lot of men (and woman) albeit in a Scandinavian country - I’d just like to say you’re totally on point on so many crucial things here (at least in my mind for whatever that’s worth). As an aside I haven’t cried in years myself. Maybe Its because I never saw my dad cry so it’s just very difficult for me as well (I think the last time was at my stepmoms deathbed). But That’s okay too. If one can experience sadness bodily and with friendliness/compassion towards your emotions and bodily feeling - there’s little demand on how that emotion is expressed. At least so it seems to me. It’s alright as long as you have that internal connection to yourself. I’m binge watching your videos atm and find them really addictive. From mage/wraith/vampire the masquerade to cultural critiques of our current zeitgeist and everything in between. Great work!
@rageofinfinity2032
2 жыл бұрын
I swear, when you were talking about being in an abusive household and learning to manage others' emotions, I was like "Wow! He just hit the nail on the head, I fucking love this guy!" xD
@modestMousse
Жыл бұрын
"men tend to only really clean up their apartments when they know a woman is coming over, or all kinds of others guest ... the only people who are worth that other people, and not yourself. Why is that?" - this is the bit where i hit subscribe.
@necrosteel5013
4 ай бұрын
It's simple, It takes too much energy and lacks an effective benefit, Making women not angry and having the guests being pleased. Men need convincing to comprehend the value of cleaning up their apartment. It is born from his lack of ability to relate to his own space, his lack of clarity in his own ideas and his lack of energy he has to waste in things he considers not worth it.
@Madman1234855
2 жыл бұрын
To answer your question, the dog and guy are two aspects of the same being, Barbas is part of Clavicus Vile, which is why he can't get rid of him.
@fukingidiot9156
2 жыл бұрын
Man, your bad American impression at the beginning gave me a little glimpse into what my bad European impression might sound like to people who live in Europe
@mike4490
2 жыл бұрын
Man I haven't cried in years. My home is not a safe space living with emotionally abusive parents. I feel the same way Burger I just cant seem to cry even alone at my parents house. Even at my grandpas funeral I held it in. Now I just walk around with everything bottled up. Its hard and stresses me out too. Just feel like once the damn opens I will never recover.
@castielsisko2120
2 жыл бұрын
Opening the dam is the first step to recovery
@corbanekarel3692
11 ай бұрын
Yep. I remember reading a man on the Internet say : I don't cry because if I do I'll crawl in a fetus and never get up. And that's when it clicked that this is how I felt, and somehow and made me outburst into tears. And I recovered, as opposed to what I thought.
@petrdavid7434
2 жыл бұрын
My mother in law once said that I'm not a real man because I cant do all the manly housechores. So I told her that as an actual man, I dont give a shit what she says :D
@danieltallon4316
2 жыл бұрын
Damnit. I came to this channel for some World of Darkness lore and instead I got some freaking free therapy. Thank you!!!!
@cameronk.2777
2 жыл бұрын
I remember I had a huge problem with crying, even in private, and it took a lot for me to get back into the idea, and I'm making a lot of progress with that. It helps that I've basically found the things that make me cry.
@Shinkajo
Жыл бұрын
So you cry in public now?
@cameronk.2777
Жыл бұрын
@@Shinkajo when I can lol
@wargriffin5
2 жыл бұрын
"Don't go to the hospital..." *"Die..."* "Be a man." 😉
@SupertoastGT
Жыл бұрын
That opening was perfect. That American accent was almost dead on. Funny stuff.
@Zathurious
2 жыл бұрын
Although I hesitate to admit it, you have put into words what I have been feeling lately. Thank you, sir.
@fallofall1914
Жыл бұрын
I clicked on your video for the 13 Vampires a few days ago, and now I'm thinking about my life's choices, which is a good thing. I have the strength to step forward. Thank you, Burgerwar.
@kutkuknight
Жыл бұрын
The imaginary biased best friend in your head as well as writing down good things is literal therapy content, it’s a big part of how I got my depression in check and it WORKS I am living proof, not just for men but for everyone, it’s great, be healthy, love yourself!
@terrybennett6801
2 жыл бұрын
I must’ve watched your intro 20 times and died each time.
@athomps14at
2 жыл бұрын
@27:49 Dude I feel that on a core level A few months ago I was so depressed and anxious and I was just CRAMMING AND CRAMMING it down because you gotta be tough right?? I was so fucked up one day at work I cracked a plastic tool cart in my hands because I couldn't keep the feelings down anymore and I broke out weeping and sobbing just to let it out. A good friend at work gave me a hug told everyone to fuck off and it felt so good to just let it out and have that support
@botondhetyey159
Жыл бұрын
"Scheming takes up a lot of brain power, and if you don't do it, you can use all that brainpower to think about puppies" is the best quote I've ever heard in a video essay.
@khbgvc
2 жыл бұрын
I cringe at guys at the gym who grab weights that are too heavy for them and they pump them with almost no range of motion or proper form. :-/
@dumfriesspearhead7398
Жыл бұрын
OMG! I'm not the only one. I've seen guys jerky range of movement and I CRINGE. It's as if no one has shown them how to properly use equipment without damaging themselves.
@Kakashiownsyou
5 ай бұрын
Aw, dude, I hear you on the difficulty with purposefully crying. Cuz you can feel it. My sister and I talk about it, where I'm like "i got a cry kickin' around; waiting for it to shake loose." Emotional mastery is a real work in progress lol
@surelychordophonic
2 жыл бұрын
I love how I can tell that you weren't from the south, and yet, your impression was a way better accent than I myself, as an American, can do. Plus the video was cool or whatever.
@CarlVolt
2 жыл бұрын
You are doing a good job putting into words difficult thoughts without making it seem like you are talking down.
@ianhoke1472
2 жыл бұрын
Maybe I'm speaking too soon, but I'm probably going to carry some of these things that you've said with me for the rest of my life. Thank you.
@obosuck
Жыл бұрын
Personally I always find the Jungian Masculine Archetypes really inspiring when it comes to masculinity. The King, The Magician, The Warrior, and The Lover are all really fascinating things to aspire to. Like the idea of taking ownership of your life and building a kingdom is quite inspiring, like Jordan Peterson is not wrong that men want responsibility (I'll just never understand how he can say things like "yeah donald trump is a huge narcissist which is why the radical left...") 21:15 it's really fascinating to hear this vocalized. Like there are all sorts of grains of truth in the Manosphere, like the go your own way is the epitome of be self reliant for your sake alone but then all they do is hate on women. 23:10 ... same 26:00 the fascinating thing is that the best way to protect yourself from emotional manipulation is to cultivate enough trust in yourself to get yourself out of the manipulative situation 29:00 here is the second thing, if you don't feel your emotions and process them in a healthy manner you are going to be moody. I can't tell you how many men I know that are moody because they can't handle their own emotions. 30:00 weird aside but I grew up in Utah and crying men in a very public situation is a virtue for the dominant religion there 38:00 yeah the crying thing is weird, I fully know that I need the catharsis of crying but it never happens day after day. 40:00 I will do anything for myself lol. I have more a two wolves situation with my personality, the large rational one protecting the squishy emotional one. Granted I am currently trying to get the emotional one a lot stronger.
@fatalkookie
2 жыл бұрын
You sir, have a magnificent voice and oratory skills and I enjoy these type of videos from you immensly! Shame that such important subjects are not viewed as much. Have yourself a great day!
@derpherp1810
2 жыл бұрын
1:05:41 and at that very moment, it clicked for me. I always highly respected honor and doing the right thing even when nobody will appreciate it or you will not be caught for your misdeeds. However this very mentality has given me the excuse to do nothing with my life, and now that I see it for the dishonorable thing that it is I NOW KNOW WHAT I MUST DO! To me this feels like that eureka moment in the battle where the enemy has the upper hand and you think oh no its pointless, but then the anime protagonist remembers something and manages to get the upper hand.
@whiteshadow943
2 жыл бұрын
Could you elaborate on this for me? I currently value these things and I don’t see why this is wrong? Honor and doing the right thing are important to me because I believe they’re important to leaving the world they way I would like to I guess
@acer0255
2 жыл бұрын
Being honorable to create a better world, where people aren't rendered weak for a few to feel strong. Mind over matter.
@moroncrow9820
2 жыл бұрын
I can't brush off that hes just quouting spider man this whole time
@lemonZzzzs
2 жыл бұрын
wait, people get a dopamine hit when cleaning? hax.
@Mixinnitup
2 жыл бұрын
You ever wipe a really dusty table and see that shine? Shits better than crack
@johnnyandtheinsatiablevoid
2 жыл бұрын
I clicked on the video because I have exactly one hour and five minutes before I need to get ready for work and I find your dulcet tones hypnotically soothing and they generally form words I agree with.
@piper636
2 жыл бұрын
As a trans woman who grew up completely repressed in a very conservative area... Men really need to hear this; that it's okay to be whatever version of you you really are, that being vulnerable and empathetic aren't signs of weakness. Lord knows I would've found myself earlier if someone just told me it was okay to do that
@niconicokneecaps9649
Жыл бұрын
Bro did it better than barbie ever could
@Ariel_is_a_dreamer
Жыл бұрын
I was thinking that!! It's the monologue to wake up the Kens
@slowbowz6383
Жыл бұрын
@@Ariel_is_a_dreamerlol no. I wanted to like this video because I enjoy listening to other people's views on masculinity, but he lost me when he started talking about trannies. Trannies and porn addicts on discord and twitter groom young lonely neurodivergent males into porn addiction, fetishes, femboysm, ecc. They are an enemy of the male gender. What communist scum like him don't understand is that men like Tate because he understands what young men really want. Also he doesn't understand that the so called "patriarchical" system worked for thousands of years, but was sabotaged by communists and spiteful genetic mutants.
@keithoma7265
2 жыл бұрын
A comment to support the algorithm gods.
@chrismorel8613
2 жыл бұрын
Never violate a woman Never harm a child Don't lie, cheat or steal Attempt if possible to shield the virtuous weak from the evil strong. A slightly adapted iron code of Druss the legend by way of David Gemmell has been my yardstick
@Anglisc1682
2 жыл бұрын
I think virtuous weak and evil strong are for the most part oxymorons. I'm not sure how that isn't more obvious to people! For example, it is overwhelmingly WEAK men who commit r*pe, not strong or powerful men.
@joemahma3017
Жыл бұрын
@@Anglisc1682 You can call them weak all you like but pretending that any man that does evil is always weak 1) is a prescriptive gender role which I’m told is a no-no nowadays and 2) completely ignores the men who are, in fact, powerful in a literal sense in that they have massive wealth and are fully capable of being evil.
@Chrisspru
2 жыл бұрын
thing about "getting away" with something: it can only exist, if you limit what your value to your own limited life. the whole procession of influencable eternity can be valued though, and provides much more chances for value than limiting yourself to a few years. and from such a valueable timeframe, "getting away" with destruction is not a thing. the goal is to do good overall, as perfection in every case is not humanly possible or something that can be asked of you.
@grouchy88
2 жыл бұрын
Or the Ron Swanson way: 'how to be a man?' 'be a man'
@citystone1324
9 ай бұрын
Thanks for the insights. I struggle with self reliance, kindness, and honor on a daily basis, but your talk makes all three seem a bit more accessible.
@doctorgames101b
9 ай бұрын
Right on, Burger. Well put. Good video.
@lendelsmanio6412
2 жыл бұрын
I'm a non-binary and as someone who was asigned male at birth and grew up with those toxics models of masculinity and internalized them I was deeply touched by this video. I just ended my therapy yesterday and I was insecure about some things that were bothering me and felt a little bit incomplete and watching this video made me realise what was happening with me and put the pieces together a lot better, and also made me realise that I made a step in the right direction as many things said here matches a lot of the things I feel I need to do from now on. Those patriarchal patterns affects everyone who has grown up with a lot of masculine expectations being thrown on their shoulders and has been socialized in such a manner that they always felt the obligation to corespond to said expectations, and I can not understate how important it is for people like me who are trans AMAB people, to get in touch with this kinds of debates, it's very healthy and helpful and shows a lot of things we usually ignore but that are still there. I think a lot of trans people has this tendency to avoid topics relating to the gender they were asigned at birth because it is more comfortable and convenient to do so, however this shit stays and shapes a lot of the fundamental problems we have in our personal lives, so it's not only a good practice to participate in such discourses (even as only listeners), but also extremely necessary. So yeah, I don't know if you're going to read this, but I would like to deeply thank you for making this video, it made all the difference for me :D
@dmoneyonair
2 жыл бұрын
this is straight gold.
@insaeo
Жыл бұрын
I think its bunk that this amazing video does not not have more attention, if not just for that chefs kiss of an intro
@alphalax7747
2 жыл бұрын
Chad
@henriquefinger935
Жыл бұрын
6:37 part is "funny" to me because it reminds me of a time where a friend of mine, which is black, told me about his experiences with racism IRL, which I had not actually seen before. While I was well aware that racism was a thing, the actual experience still gave me a perspective shock. It is very easy to fall in this bias.
@jesusimpersonator1648
2 жыл бұрын
24:35 The meme is that funkopops are purchased by redditors. Also they're kinda generic
@RigoVids
Жыл бұрын
45:30 the kid doing the naruto run is spongebob, and you are squidward.
@jvl975
2 жыл бұрын
Great video man! Thank you for all the effort you put to adress the topic like this, cheers!
@ragingnoob3603
Жыл бұрын
even though I'm highley against feminism as a whole and don't think patriarchy is a thing, I do like and agree with most of your points, your pretty spot on in my eyes.
@LovesickLegend
2 жыл бұрын
God, I needed this. Thank you.
@jestahead
7 ай бұрын
6:13 this is the first time I've ever seen a feminist acknowledge this. My experience growing up was exactly this: the men who were doing all the bad stuff weren't easy targets and I was an easy target so feminists just constantly blamed me for all this shit I wasn't doing, had no control or influence over, and didn't benefit from. That pushed me to the far right and I've only recently been able to deradicalise myself. Unfortunately I still can't trust feminists because I have no evidence that there are any on this planet besides yourself who think the way you do.
@edgarwallace286
Жыл бұрын
Loved the video. Very enlightening. PS. Mine was the 2000th like ;P
@UberMenschNowFilms
2 жыл бұрын
Got to the end. I feel like a real human bean.
@ZagorTeNayebo
2 жыл бұрын
Be the cool and interesting d&d character you want to play
@percival413
2 жыл бұрын
hell yeah brother!!!!!!!!! good vid v helpful 👍
@caplorunnin
2 жыл бұрын
Alright there, Steve Harrington, put the chest bush away and save some ladies for the rest of us.
@sirlogufo
2 жыл бұрын
Thanks man, Amazing video. Cheers
@williamchristy9463
Жыл бұрын
One thing that gets ignored is that male tearducts are physically different, and make it physically more difficult to produce tears.
@lucidnode
2 жыл бұрын
I thought the hate on Funko Pops was because a lot of figurine collectors don't consider them worthy of collecting and look down on people who own them for having no taste, being uncultured, and just liking whatever's popular. They're really simple and despite that often have mistakes and all the figures have the same (chibi)? body shape. Never heard of masculinity being a part of it, but I guess I can see it coming from a different group of people. I own one of Grell from Black Butler and can see why these "real," collectors are irked by Funko Pops being *THE* big name figurines (ig this is the outgrowth you were talking about). There's not nearly as much care put into them as whatever they probably collect and like the name says, they just make figures of whatever's popular in nerd culture and beyond if they think it'll sell. I like my Grell though, Funko Pops aren't a bad desk companion. Would never buy a second one though, don't need more than one. Edit: Love the video, I hope you do more long form things on this channel Edit 2: that last minute was pure gold 😆
@milkporch
2 жыл бұрын
I thonk he is talk f something like my ex has done to me. I was talking about gunpla( gundam plastic models) and she used it to ridiculize me saying "Aren't u tired to play with ur liittle toy, man up"
@jambott5520
2 жыл бұрын
Honestly dont mind the idea abot funko pops. Would probably get them if I didnt utterly despise the style, it genuinely makes me want to light them on fire. Doesnt make me judge the people who buy them, people have different tastes, and this just isnt mine.
@jamesfrederick.
2 жыл бұрын
What if you love you’re self enough to not force you’re self to work because I don’t enjoy it so my apartment is dirty
@Brightfur10
2 жыл бұрын
When I know that I need to cry, the video for Little Motel by Modest Mouse usually gets me there. I never considered this before, but I guess being able to cry when you need to is something that gets better with practice too. It's important to have a healthy relationship with it. I'm a woman but I definitely have many traits that made it really hard to be okay with crying in the past, especially during really hard times when I felt like I had to cry a lot. I've gotten much better at balancing it though. I hope men out there and just people in general who struggle with crying can continue to realize that it's not just okay, it's natural
@WickedHole
2 жыл бұрын
Pretty decent Foghorn Leghorn impression
@themannaking
6 ай бұрын
I love this video, thank you
@noway8259
Жыл бұрын
Gosh I agree if I could cry more than thrice a year that would be great!
@slowjamsliver7006
2 жыл бұрын
Legend of Korra announcer voice, nice.
@kormoranvogel1714
3 ай бұрын
I liked that video. As an amab enby, it was kind of hard at times, because it made me feel like it also applies to me, but i am not a man, but having a guide for how to be a decent person is pretty valuable if we want to move away from toxic masculinity. I would have liked the "this is not a guide specifically for masculinity but for being a decent person after being rased as a man" part atthe front.
@cgarcia660
9 ай бұрын
I’m glad I watched til the end cause I was starting to feel like I didn’t belong in the male space, being a woman. But I also have a son so I need the lesson.
@j.2512
4 ай бұрын
if you are a single mother then you already failed him.
@cgarcia660
4 ай бұрын
@@j.2512 I have been with his father for almost 25 yrs. I got extremely lucky early on. But most single moms aren’t single by choice so I don’t know what your point is.
@scarabairsoft221
2 жыл бұрын
Oh my god that apartment cleaning bit kills me
@khbgvc
2 жыл бұрын
I started this video with headphones at work and I was NOT PREPARED FOR THE COMEDY 😂😂😂😂😂
@jackdeniston6150
2 жыл бұрын
A 'real man' pretty much is a term that means 'serve the interest of woman'. At the mans expense.
@AbsolemMoonchild
Жыл бұрын
I always liked the phrase "honour is forged on the anvil of responsibilty with the hammer of duty" it may have been from a David Gemmell book
@slowrunn3r88
Жыл бұрын
I’m a straight, cisgender man. I have a big following on social media, because of all the pretty dresses I wear. I’ve had younger people come up to me at anime conventions (I am a cosplayer) and say “hey…. I follow you on TikTok… your videos make me smile 🥺🥺🥺” and it’s so sweet 🥰🥰 I do get a lot of trolls, but sadly, I don’t get nearly as many trolls as I would like, lol 😂 I’ve had people say “this video/post is the king of masculinity!” Hahaha
@noway8259
Жыл бұрын
Your very cool!
@slowrunn3r88
Жыл бұрын
@@noway8259 well thank you!
@JwismaAjsmaka
6 ай бұрын
Are u castrated
@Tinkering4Time
3 ай бұрын
We did it. We found the inverse of Andrew Tate and Jordan Peterson. ❤
@taith2
Жыл бұрын
In the opening i were like: damn open windows to let cigarette smoke out, or nowadays in Poland: close damn windows from the smoke
@oxylepy2
Жыл бұрын
"You probably clicked on this video for a reason" nah, autoplay and I just like your videos in general Definitely cry more, dude. Find the right music (Nice Fox by The Rosebuds always gets me there), show, underlying concept. Friendships overcoming all odds often works for me, One Piece does this a lot for example. Right now my cat isn't doing too well so pretty much everything is making me cry, often in terrible spaces for crying like in the middle of digging a trench for a french drain... the self care of triggering yourself crying is pretty vital
@deetmah5800
2 жыл бұрын
PEOPLE GET DOPAMINE FOR CLEANING!?!?!? I barely get Dopamine for... fooor.. I barely get Dopamine.
@zachfred958
11 ай бұрын
Dresses are objectively very comfortable
@Sternenherz127
Жыл бұрын
In Essence: Explore your abilities, faults and moral Compass. Virtues are always a double-edged Sword. In order to not having them corrupted is be steadfast but also be aware when Virtues are in need for a Situation you are in. Like in all Things the right Balance of Action and Inaction is difficult to sort out. If you are not sure: Take your Abilities, Faults, Moral Compass and act in accordance with it. Going your own way for now. Try to be open-minded with fellow Males. Building your path with their help but also help them in return. Showing Respect and support to other Men is in most cases a good starting Point showing your noble Soul and healthy intentions. Honour comes in deeper Friendship and Brotherhood. Being an Aspect of showing the Bond you have is something you cherish and holding your highest Respect as well as having almost the Top Priority in Availability. What if you have any Sort of Problems. Try solve it and if it takes Time. Take it. People who know you will understand or even support you. If they don't push them out of your Circle. If you need help. Get it if you can.
@Teufelshund2171
Жыл бұрын
Honor or Integrity? Good video. Edit: You vs "The Car" cracked me up. Thanks.
@borderlinebuddhist
2 жыл бұрын
Making this comment right after the bit. Thank you for telling us that it was actually amaretto in the glass. These details matter.
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