John calming her down by talking about her husband and the gym in the beginning just shows how great he is at communicating.
@sarahjoy8479
3 жыл бұрын
Dr. D is a great dude
@CarlGorn
3 жыл бұрын
Dr. D's great, no question. Side Note: That first-meet story would be great in a movie.
@mtwata
3 жыл бұрын
Right? He pretends the conversation went the wrong direction, but he's actually calming her down. Genius
@luminous6969
3 жыл бұрын
It's a psychological technique where you get someone to change their emotional state temporarily at the beginning of an interaction. Tony Robbins often uses the same technique.
@user-kz8bt1os1i
2 жыл бұрын
Ikr!?
@melissawilson4796
Жыл бұрын
This poor girl was on the verge of tears at the beginning and you had her giggling in minutes. So sweet
@JoDawnNZ
4 ай бұрын
Giggling was a clear trauma sign, it's a defenceman, but certainly can feel good in the moment
@LB-uo7xy
3 ай бұрын
Wouldn't YOU be if you were in HER shoes? Have some compassion for other human beings named women.
@4everBlessed365
Ай бұрын
@JoDawnNZ Yes, I thought the same thing. Praying for her.
@kpj2224
Ай бұрын
@@LB-uo7xywtf are you talking about?
@samueljimenez7420
10 ай бұрын
I am a grown man and I don’t cry often. This one was hard to hear. I’m praying for her, and her marriage
@wilsonpatterson6729
6 ай бұрын
Same here. That would be so hard to carry
@esan0715
6 ай бұрын
I have a 14 year old daughter. I could not stop crying dude... 😢
@crimson1919
4 ай бұрын
Ditto. Hurts imagining it at all, but much more with a wife and daughter.
@not.the.game.destiny2694
4 ай бұрын
Men feelings are valid don't change I was nearly trafficked so I know personally how touchy this topic is😢
@TheRealMonnie
3 ай бұрын
I cried the whole time. Poor girl. Every Christian hearing this needs to pray for her and her family
@rleonekc07
5 ай бұрын
"Is he super good lookin`" John is so good at bringing people back from dark emotions
@SaboSean
3 жыл бұрын
I was relieved when she said he was dead. I was worried he could still somehow get to her, especially with her calling a national show like this.
@ivorybow
2 жыл бұрын
The fact that he's dead relieves her husband of the rage that would want to go after him.
@candace3493
Жыл бұрын
@@ivorybow Not necessarily. It's still vicariously distressing.
@rebexxa
6 ай бұрын
I was relieved as well. I know it doesn’t end any pain for her, really, but she never explained how she truly got away from the relationship emotionally, just physically. I was wondering what more there was to the story until learning that he was dead lol
@anonymous3174
6 ай бұрын
@@candace3493yeh but it'll keep the husband out of jail.
@katsa6052
4 ай бұрын
I was relieved that he's never gonna hurt anybody else and hopefully burning in hell if God ever exists but I'm also heartbroken that she can't ask the question 'why' to his face. I know because I want to ask my abuser
@_empressofdeath
5 ай бұрын
As a survivor, I had to stop reading the comments after seeing so many people (majority males) saying she is wrong or anything less than for not intially telling her husband about her past. Being a victim of this crime is INCREDIBLY COMPLEX! If her husband would divorce her for not having the capacity to speak her truth, that's on HIM. She did nothing wrong. Big love to the caller! You have survivored what would kill most and for what it's worth, I Am so proud of you. Plus, any other survivors who may be reading this 💚 Healing is not linear.
@hereforthecomments456
5 ай бұрын
What comments are you reading? I didn’t see any saying she was wrong
@msbockel
4 ай бұрын
@@hereforthecomments456they may have been moderated out
@GodessIsabelRaina
4 ай бұрын
Sad what happened to her but selfish that she didn't say. It wasn't her fault what happened and if he can't handle it, then he isn't for her
@Sophia.871
4 ай бұрын
Well said. People can impress these memories for many, many years. Often people with post traumatic stress disorder have avoidance and can't even talk about trauma. It's interesting that you mentioned. These men in the comments having this opinion, It's interesting that they never have this opinion when speaking about men with trauma, for example, Military. It's a double standard
@user-fj9en8xf4z
4 ай бұрын
Thank you!!!! It’s not easy to be that survivor
@jbr2991
3 жыл бұрын
Dr. Delony is amazing. The way he calmed her down and diffused a possible panic attack was just brilliant. He made sure she was in a safe place before she began telling him her situation. I realize he is educated on how to counsel, but he has all kinds of stuff coming at him. Even if he has a paragraph in front of him regarding the callers problem, he still has no idea what the person is going to say. I love the way he can switch from goofy and making everyone laugh, to getting to the nuts and bolts of the situation and being serious.
@annaelisavettavonnedozza9607
Жыл бұрын
He is awesome I just found him! I ❤his advice
@TFQ161
Жыл бұрын
@@annaelisavettavonnedozza9607 wow me too, I’ve been on a binge here I feel like I’m almost in therapy because everything he says makes such complete sense
@ChrisWilliams-kq9qq
Жыл бұрын
Doctor doctor of what the Dude Looks like he's younger than me and I'm still screwed up in the head what do you know about life in your 30 or whatever he is
@BlackStump172
6 ай бұрын
I like the way he stops the callers and gets them to slow down and relax . He is very quick to pick up what is being said . He looks like Michael Buble .
@sungchia280
3 ай бұрын
I think he's exceptionally good at what he does....trust me, a lot of therapists do NOTHING in a session but still charge you $200 per session
@helenhilton2158
10 ай бұрын
My heart went out to this woman as she told her story. I felt for her, but the tears didn’t come until John asked her what her husband would do when she tells him about it, and she said, “He’s going to hug me and cry.” What a man! That’s the kind of confidence every woman ought to have in her husband-the knowledge that he loves her that much!
@billymabum3514
6 ай бұрын
Huh ? A real man would walk away from damaged goods
@jenniferbarry5887
6 ай бұрын
@@billymabum3514 A real man would be ashamed that members of his sex could do this.
@VMHCreationsYT
6 ай бұрын
@@billymabum3514 We’re all damaged goods. If you think you’re not, your damage is pride.
@billymabum3514
6 ай бұрын
@@VMHCreationsYT men being damaged isn’t the same as a woman who’s damaged. We’re not the same
@sveng3192
6 ай бұрын
@@billymabum3514I agree we are not the same, but damage is damage
@monicavandeventer5429
2 жыл бұрын
I’m a sex trafficking survivor. I told my husband about 6 months into dating and he didn’t care. He proposed 11 months into dating. We have been married about 2.5 years, and we have a few issues, especially with our sex life, but we are working on them. I ended up with complex ptsd and a bipolar disorder.
@a.b.2405
2 жыл бұрын
Thank God he wasn’t one of those guys that’ll throw your trauma in your face and treat you worse…
@monicavandeventer5429
2 жыл бұрын
@@a.b.2405 he grew up with drugs, shitty parents that abandoned him for half of his life so he basically had to raise himself, he also had his own baggage to bring into the relationship, and we understand that our pasts do not define us.
@purplelove3666
2 жыл бұрын
Why would he care? You got trafficked!. Its not your fault.
@thetruehustler1365
2 жыл бұрын
@@purplelove3666 you’d be surprised
@Valhal1776
Жыл бұрын
@@purplelove3666 why would he care? You'd have to be an ignoramus to not understand how difficult it can be for the partner to accept these things happened to the person they love.
@dakotaflower5926
Жыл бұрын
I’m actually more impressed about how quickly he recognized this was going to be really HEAVY than how he diffused the situation. I didn’t see this conversation heading to such a traumatizing escape. I hope this young lady is doing well. There’s a lot of good in the world to counteract the evil.
@1232lyft
4 ай бұрын
They literally screen the callers prior ? He knew exactly what she was going to tell him
@marki57686
4 ай бұрын
@@1232lyftor because she was already crying and you can hear that. Omg are you two deaf?
@1232lyft
4 ай бұрын
@@marki57686 they screen the callers . No amount of name calling is going to make you correct.
@Arobisme
3 ай бұрын
@@marki57686he's not wrong at all though
@Stacydsullivan
20 күн бұрын
They have to submit the emails in advance.
@CozyJoney
6 ай бұрын
Sex trafficking should be an automatic life sentence.
@lynndiehl8126
4 ай бұрын
I was abused and trafficked as a teen, barely 18. I didn't meet my husband until i was 30 after years of bad decisions/relationships and then finally a lot of healing. I told him i was hurt sexually when i was younger. And then slowly as i felt i could or if i became triggered. I would tell him more and more. After about 2 1/2 yrs he knew most. Knew what he knew without all the gruesome details that i didn't want anyone to ever know. I have now been married for 11 yrs this month. I still get triggered at times but it got less and less with his acceptance, love, and kindness.
@uhuhmingbird3018
3 ай бұрын
I can’t speak for all men here obviously, but if I was her current partner it would break my heart that she had been through this. I would completely understand that she hadn’t told me and I would be so so proud of her for getting herself out of that situation.
@BigHeartNoBS
5 күн бұрын
This is how a mature man thinks. Thank you. As someone who's been there, it's really difficult coming forward because speaking from experience, the partner will either invalidate you, feel like it's okay to treat you like crap, tell you to get over it and move on, and the list goes on. Thank you for being compassionate and understanding. Wish more men were like you.
@nahqiv
2 сағат бұрын
Some other commenters' takes are absolutely wild. This is the only decent reaction someone could possibly have. Plus, she told him enough about her abuse so that he could understand how she is and why she reacts the way she does in certain situations. There's no obligation to go any further.
@summershandy19
5 ай бұрын
John, the level of empathy you showed her is commendable.
@LindaM1976
4 ай бұрын
I had some family trauma and I saw an awful counselor who looked at me and said “so what to you want me to do about this?” I was shocked and I said I didn’t come here for you to solve my problem, I came here for help in how to cope. What a jerk. I left there feeling worse than ever.
@reneeantwi-boasiako3974
4 ай бұрын
I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤
@msbeecee1
4 ай бұрын
Wow 😢 that counselor sucked
@Somethinglikethat2023
4 ай бұрын
And you moved on!!! Knowing no help there..,
@LindaM1976
4 ай бұрын
@@Somethinglikethat2023 I wanted to report him but I didn’t, don’t know why but I did tell my primary doctor not to refer him anymore. I think he needs to retire.
@mmmmlllljohn
4 ай бұрын
I hope you received the help and support you so desperately needed. So sorry this happened to you. ❤️🇨🇦🙏
@AdrianaSLeal
2 жыл бұрын
Wow. Being a high school science teacher for 20 years, now I’m thinking about all my students (always girls) who were overly apologetic. Some that would start every sentence with the words, “I’m sorry.” I’d naively think and say to them that they have nothing to be sorry for… I’m not scary, ask your question and I’ll re-teach “x” to you. I’m actually crying for them and any trauma they might have been living through.
@Cathy-xi8cb
2 жыл бұрын
This is an American cultural response for women. It is learned at home and through watching other girls and women behave this way. Guys rarely do this. If you find one that does, THAT would be a stronger indicator of abuse. Because 1 in 4 women have experienced some degree of sexual assault (groping, unsolicited sex-related insults and comments, date rape, etc) by 15, you cannot tease this out on one behavior.
@casdraws
Жыл бұрын
@@Cathy-xi8cb the stats on how many women are sexually abused in the USA is high. And then those who are verbally or physically abused, it is likely those girls who over apologize it’s a survival mechanism. If enough people are doing it, I guess you can call that “culture.”
@blueseptember2174
Жыл бұрын
I always started every sentence with "I'm sorry". Never sexually abused. I was way too empathic of others emotions because my dad was always yelling. So probably verbal abuse.
@SQUELCH-zj7il
Жыл бұрын
@@Cathy-xi8cb It's not just in American culture (I'm Irish). Women/girls are told that they should act humble and be polite. I find myself doing this all the time 😭
@annmarie6870
Жыл бұрын
I've heard that before from me and others the "I'm sorry."
@shannonparker1
4 ай бұрын
I'm a survivor as well. My heart is totally with you! That's exactly how I got out, too! I escaped. I ran away while the person was passed out. I ran into a gas station and hid behind the counter and waited for the police to come. It was the scariest moment of my life. This NEVER leaves you. But we can heal and use this for good to help other survivors. ❤❤❤❤
@reneeantwi-boasiako3974
4 ай бұрын
I hope you are OK now 🙏🏿 ❤️
@cynthiawills8944
4 ай бұрын
God blessed you to get out of that situation
@vaska1999
3 ай бұрын
You're so courageous! May life be good to you in the future.
@MalloryNewcomb
7 ай бұрын
2:04 Dr John is epitome of sweet dad energy: easing the tension and making her laugh even she’s still crying a bit.
@jclheriteau
Жыл бұрын
This interview made me CRY. Poignant, realist, sad and still so raw... I am not a religious man but I pray for Liz a strong, resilient amazing woman. The diffusion of the tension by John at the beginning was a masterclass. Thank you.
@bbooher9663
5 ай бұрын
Jcl, it's about relationship, not religion
@natashah9056
3 жыл бұрын
It would break my heart to know that my spouse or child was carrying a weight like that and didn't trust me to love them through it.
@3CulosGordos
Жыл бұрын
Mmmm I would have nothing to do with you... Explaining trauma might retraumatize the victim if they're not ready... Is not about trusting you, is about being ready
@assyrianprincess3
Жыл бұрын
@@3CulosGordos Its still valid for them to feel hurt.
@justinnaarden9290
Жыл бұрын
@@3CulosGordos if you are not ready, dont step into a relationship again...plain and simple
@phelps1485
Жыл бұрын
I feel like her parents dropped the ball with their parenting and she doesn't trust them. There's definitely a lot that we don't know about her childhood that led into her situation.
@YesYesYesJeff
Жыл бұрын
@@3CulosGordos you clearly haven't learned a fucking thing watching this show. Secrets are the root of all evil.
@RespekfulFungus
2 жыл бұрын
I was in her husbands shoes. I knew things weren’t right, but never knew to this extent. Hiding it, even just early on, has made everything so much harder. Even 9 years later, literally in this very moment, it’s a whirlwind of unintentional pain in all directions. Tell them sooner, it will save your life, the alternative is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
@SalznPfeffer658
Жыл бұрын
From your perspective & experience, it is totally understandable to expect and want full disclosure from your partner. But we're flawed humans and we're all a little or a lot, broken by past experiences outside our control mentally, emotionally & physically and sometimes one is not ready or strong enough to break the psychological conditioning imposed upon survivors in order to literally survive. I hope your situation improves and that you try your best to maintain an empathetic perspective.
@rpcp5v18
Жыл бұрын
I can’t help but think it was selfish for her to keep this from her husband, since before getting married. I feel like she was only thinking about what she would lose and how it would affect her, rather than be selfless and loving enough to respect that her husband (then boyfriend) may not want this for himself.
@DarthFurie
Жыл бұрын
@RPC P5V18 it's challenging to say it's "selfish," but I agree that this should have been disclosed before marriage. Reason being, like you said, not everyone is prepared for a lifetime of what it takes to love and support a survivor of major trauma. And it can cause more pain when you're harboring that pain, it always comes out unconsciously, and the other person can be insensitive because they don't know. But they're already married now, so hopefully they can go to therapy together and heal
@janelleg597
Жыл бұрын
Dang ❤❤❤
@Matt-cr4vv
Жыл бұрын
It’s unfair to call it selfish because that entirely dismisses the extreme difficulty of how hard it is to disclose something as traumatic as this is and how painful it is when you speak of the events and how she relives the trauma. That isn’t some easy thing that she delayed on because she was self interested and selfish. It’s also reasonable to be scared that someone you have trust in and love with will abandon ship once they’re informed about it. That’s fair for the person to do because they’re not required to stay but it’s an entirely reasonable fear to have and would be extremely challenging. That being said I do think this is something that should be discussed before marriage because I do think marriage should be entered with full knowledge between the parties but I have empathy for her and how difficult this entire thing had to have been for her. As John mentions with the things people adapt into doing when they’re trafficked it’s extremely easy for people not in the situation to say what people should be doing in these scenarios and sadly they dismiss the difficulty of it
@Joy-xe6df
5 ай бұрын
She sounds like such a sweet & broken woman. I hope she has found comfort and peace in her husband and in a therapist. 💙
@shethewriter
Жыл бұрын
It’s touching that she was not only so gutsy, but made sure her dogs were ok and told people the situation.
@squidward6187
Жыл бұрын
Victims are told. We are selfish. We want to share the abuse we suffered with others. How dare we. We should keep it to ourselves. I know. I was told that. By my abusive family. They control everything. You are not selfish. I am not selfish. All I want is accountability. How is that selfish?
@kdphotos4691
6 ай бұрын
Exactly, and it may take a while to learn "how" to trust others because some will pretend to be loving and give you space so you tell them of your trauma only to have them weaponise it against you later. This is what happens to SA survivors every time they hear someone preach about what women should wear or that they should be nice or any other beliefs that are pushed to set girls up to be easy prey for abusers.
@emathecat
5 ай бұрын
Some people are POS. Try to stay clear of these sorts of people, as they are most likely the selfish one, not you. Good luck.
@hayaq9991
4 ай бұрын
Wow thats crazy.. well its not your fault, you take as long as you need to health and ppl are stupid
@bebop504
Жыл бұрын
My story is similar to hers but I’m not married. I had to escape and run away like that too. If you haven’t been through a situation like this, it’s hard to comprehend being in fear of your life in this way. Knowing that if the person catches you, you could end up dead. It really changes you as a person. I’ve never told my real story to a single soul. Unfortunately for me, my trafficker and abuser is still alive and being released from prison soon, so I’ll be “scanning the room” for the rest of my life, basically.
@isay207
Жыл бұрын
Get a dog taser and gun learn self defense
@janelleg597
Жыл бұрын
You're worth getting well. Please get help ❤
@itchysheets1222
Жыл бұрын
Same. 💔every time I hear on the news someone died in the city he lives in, I secretly hope it was him. That’s messed up. But it’s true. Bc then me and my family wouldn’t have to live knowing he might show up any time.
@floydestelle6242
6 ай бұрын
Sorry to hear, bless you
@ilsevdg1194
4 ай бұрын
Praying for you
@dixcn
2 жыл бұрын
Deloney is a prince among men. Never in a million years would i have the wisdom and guidance to even think about handling this call even half as good as he did.
@BigHeartNoBS
3 ай бұрын
Sending my love and prayers to this woman. I'm also a survivor of sex trafficking. My own father trafficked me to two of his buddies. I was about 12 years old when it started. It's so difficult disclosing this to partners because a lot of them just don't want to deal with it, so they'll invalidate you, tell you to get over it, they wind up being just as bad. I hope her situation has a positive outcome and she lives a life of happiness with her husband. She deserves peace.
@samanthac.349
Ай бұрын
I’m so sorry you’ve gone through that. My heart goes out to you, and I hope life gets better for you.
@BigHeartNoBS
5 күн бұрын
@@samanthac.349thank you. I truly appreciate your kindness. I've been single for 3 years and very much at peace . Been focusing on healing my life and on my goals so that's been keeping life happy!😂
@tylerschoulte7513
3 жыл бұрын
One of the most touching John Delony episodes I've ever listened to. I thought this would be 30 minutes of traumatic venting, but John's interjections were so well timed and helpful to the listeners and the caller, like at 13:20
@mmmmlllljohn
4 ай бұрын
I pray that her husband and parents will support her recovery 100%. Her journey will be tough but love and respect for this brave lady is what she needs. ❤🇨🇦🙏
@assyrianprincess3
Жыл бұрын
I had some trauma that I disclosed to my fiancé, it took him a while to open up to me about his (he has PTSD) but I always was supportive and told him, “do NOT shield me from anything, if im gonna marry you then I need to know all of you, and I will love every part of you, even the parts you dont love” whatever you went through made you who you are today and you are stronger now! Be proud of yourself.
@DanceintheRaine666
4 ай бұрын
So true and succinct❤
@whyjordie
2 жыл бұрын
She’s so strong for being married, if I went through something like that I would never trust a man again
@a.b.2405
2 жыл бұрын
Exactly what I was thinking…
@fdsqueen5375
Жыл бұрын
Never trust a man period. Always be ready to leave any relationship
@adamthiry868
Жыл бұрын
@fdsqueen5375 with that attitude you should remain single
@funnygaming2672
Жыл бұрын
you should never trust people 100% trauma or not !
@Joel-pg4yi
Жыл бұрын
A man? What then you went through something since toddler till 20s? I don't trust any human being. Even if it's not to that extreme at age is so damaging I guess idk maybe it's my head and I over react or I deserve idk
@mhinim
5 ай бұрын
I'm 4 min in and the way you speak and calm her down... i'm crying loudly in my living room. what a great man you are.
@Ayesha______
5 ай бұрын
Delony is a prince among men. The amount of empathy and awesomeness in this convo is crazy.
@lisabarrett219
4 ай бұрын
Sharing what happened is beyond difficult. My husband and I were married 35 years before I told him I had been sexually abused and actually kidnapped by a man that I babysat for. There is more much I have never told anyone
@mmmmlllljohn
4 ай бұрын
So sorry this happened to you, Lisa. I hope you got some serious counselling. This was not your fault and you can talk about it if you feel safe. You must be one strong lady. Saying a prayer for you. ❤️🇨🇦🙏
@GailOwens
4 ай бұрын
@@mmmmlllljohnLovely reply however most counsellor are useless.
@mmmmlllljohn
4 ай бұрын
@@GailOwens True enough - I hope she finds a good one.
@user-gj1pq5zm4l
2 ай бұрын
@mmmmillijohn Speaking from personal experience with a family member, I believe most counsellors choose that profession because they have been through something that required counselling themselves.That often makes them good counsellors, even though they might still have their own demons, and other times they just aren’t the right fit for a patient. It’s not easy
@user-gj1pq5zm4l
2 ай бұрын
I’m so sorry. You are incredibly brave. I hope you find/found healing.
@maryt7468
2 жыл бұрын
This is one of his best calls. I don’t always love his approach, but this one was perfection.
@phylesiahill3532
3 жыл бұрын
Sending my prayers to this beautiful women on her journey to healing. She’s so powerful and deserving - we could all use this reminder. Thank you for Dr. Delaney for extending her so much grace and love during this difficult call. 🖤
@allisonjones-lo6795
7 ай бұрын
I am so proud of this young lady for having the courage to leave that guy! And I am so glad she called you.
@Texan_Gal
2 жыл бұрын
It’s such a blessing that she found someone and got married.
@BenJamin-jc4jm
5 ай бұрын
Not for him. Would be nice to know before he married her
@bbooher9663
5 ай бұрын
Jckarla, I'm grateful that she found herself. We MUST NOT abandon ourselves in a relationship!
@botanicalitus4194
5 ай бұрын
@@BenJamin-jc4jmanyone who would regret being with their partner because they experienced something like this in their past is a terribIe person. A True love would understand how horrible her experience was and be there for her, instead of getting upset
@BenJamin-jc4jm
5 ай бұрын
@@botanicalitus4194 no they are not, and she bears some level of responsibility in this situation. If he still wants to be with her after hearing the truth, that is up to him, but to not tell him prior to marriage is a low selfish act. I hope he divorces her when he finds out.
@vikashsharma353
4 ай бұрын
@@BenJamin-jc4jmyou are terrible person😡
@jenniferantonio6389
3 ай бұрын
My heart goes out to anyone who is s3xually abused or trafficked.. this was a real tear jerker. I pray for your healing. Dr. DELONY... you are a gift from God for what you do! Thank you. ❤
@zeal4god402
3 жыл бұрын
It's been a tough tough tough emotional battle. She is an exemplary woman, ready to divulge the entire truth now
@GaPeach2018
Жыл бұрын
Not that easy. Your life is threatened, you’re frightened and feel powerless. My first husband was so controlling I couldn’t do anything without his ok. I was beaten and hospitalized multiple times for being disobedient. I told my mother but she blamed me. My dad would have killed him if he knew. So I pretended everything was ok. Covered injuries with makeup and excuses. It’s not your fault. Just get out. I suffer from PTSD but my husband is loving and supportive because he knows what I went through.
@MatenaMaimela
5 ай бұрын
If I wasn't ever convinced that you are a fantastic therapist this call just further convinced me.
@FancyRPGCanada
6 ай бұрын
As a woman who went through domestic abuse, it was so amazing to hear how John talked to this woman (who went through WAAAAAAYYYY worse than me). He’s such a good dude
@Kalina1982
Жыл бұрын
I want to hug this woman so tightly. God bless her.
@karenmilovich8557
4 ай бұрын
So proud of this caller! Hugs!
@paulrandolph5483
4 ай бұрын
Dr. Delony is a gift for so many people with complex personal issues. He is valued to humanity.
@sharonamadi8656
Жыл бұрын
Dr John’s wife is one lucky woman. That’s all I’ll say.
@mmmmlllljohn
4 ай бұрын
I saw his wife on his show and I think she helped him get to where he is today … and vice versa. 😘
@LauraLParr
2 жыл бұрын
I did 12 sessions of EMDR throughout one year and it was lifechanging - its hard while youre going through it but I swear by it
@charlotteboyett-napper4780
3 жыл бұрын
You rock Dr John. I know many counselors out there somewhere who would have labeled this poor woman with a personality disorder based on a silly questionnaire they gave her before the first interview and essentially somehow blaming her for this. She doesn’t deserve any shame, insecurity, embarrassment, or fear that she won’t be accepted or will be judged or will be ostracized from others or will be rejected bu her husband and others who are in her life that she is hiding from unknowingly. Bless you dear caller.
@kellyeverett
10 ай бұрын
You know many counselors like that? How is that?
@kdphotos4691
6 ай бұрын
@@kellyeverett - There are a lot of them quick to label women with "BPD" and not trauma survivors.
@kellyeverett
6 ай бұрын
@@kdphotos4691 that’s true
@leahcompton2522
Жыл бұрын
When my husband and I were getting licensed to be foster parents, we had to do a personal history report. That was the first time I told my husband about my childhood SA. It was rough....on both of us. I'm 51 and just starting EMDR. I'm hopeful that I can get past the automatic responses and finally be able to have deep personal connections. John handled this call well. I sure pray she takes his advice and gets the help she needs. And Some people just suck.
@rayf6126
Жыл бұрын
Liz doesn't talk about her body or directly what happened until she mentioned the burn, and that therapist missed the removal from herself is how she stayed calm. Abused people can tell the most horrible things with no emotion because there is a wall between them and their bodies as long they are saying I was SA'd but the minute you confess to being held down for it the panic almost stops your breathing.
@carolkingsafer9728
3 ай бұрын
Prayers for this woman 🙏🙏🙏 and for all of us who survived SA 🙏🙏 Sending prayers and hugs 🙏🙏🙏
@jeremywilson5296
2 жыл бұрын
You guys saying she should have told him before marriage are just trolls. Things that are traumatic you have to walk through at your own pace. The fact that she is at a point now that she even reached out is amazing.
@a.b.2405
2 жыл бұрын
These trolls have no empathy at all…
@justinnaarden9290
Жыл бұрын
@@a.b.2405 its not about having no empathy. Its about not being open to your significant other, not telling WILL effect the relationship. No one is forcing them to tell anything. But a relationship is build around honesty and things you deal with....if you arent ready for that, dont go into a relationship
@user-he6rs8xi7u
Жыл бұрын
BS
@Grace-db1ix
Жыл бұрын
@@justinnaarden9290 yes but that's like saying you should divulge every single thing on the first date so that they know everything before getting into a relationship. Things unfold the way they do, it takes longer than a lifetime to truly know another person. Let alone know yourself.
@justinnaarden9290
Жыл бұрын
@@Grace-db1ix Why are you using the first date as an example??? Saying something in the first couple of hours you meet someone, or saying it after years and years of being together only to then spill out on very valueable information for your partner is just two different worlds aint it? honesty is always the best policy.
@luciapodilla1943
4 ай бұрын
Dr John is soooo incredibly wise. The way he saw immediately how heavy the conversation was going to be, and he distracted her and helped her refocus on her joy and her safe person to help hold her hand in strength so she could re-ground herself enough to tell her story... Damn. What a chef's kiss of a man to have the ability to perceive and intuitively respond in such a tactful way. Bravo.
@AndyBlackSEO
Жыл бұрын
This guy is a true professional. Knows how to navigate around sensitive issues and calming his patients / callers.
@barbiesergio7663
7 ай бұрын
I tell the 4 kids in my carpool almost weekly "____ is fighting a battle you know nothing about." Which is a great way to teach empathy. They can all recite the quote and understand why making fun of or picking on someone for their differences has no place in their lives.
@kimmyb8276
4 ай бұрын
Good for you. Wtg parent
@moishemorgenstern6147
2 жыл бұрын
What the councilor told her is absolutely disgusting. I went through the same thing. When i finally reach out for help. All im told is. Don’t worry. Your fine.
@starrjohnson1327
2 жыл бұрын
I had a doctor tell me I was "fine" after I was hit by an 18 wheeler! I reported him immediately.
@distorbia20
Жыл бұрын
I love how John calmed her down by changing the subject for a while ❤️❤️
@thenorthface4
6 ай бұрын
On the behalf of the survivor community, we are so proud of you ❤. I survived domestic violence and sexual trauma, it’s a constant battle every day to heal but I keep remembering I’m out and I survived. I was careful to select my circle though in who I tell because sometimes people don’t believe you and they don’t understand. Proud of you caller ❤
@bettersecret1499
4 ай бұрын
This is what the psychiatrist told me!!! You are fine, you are over it otherwise you will not be able to talk about it, you can choose what to think about so don't think about the past. Eff youuuu!!! Thank you John for validating my feelings too
@vaska1999
3 ай бұрын
Unbelievable! If it's not too late, do consider reporting him.
@totallifehacker1781
3 ай бұрын
You are so brave for sharing. I am praying for your healing.
@tayh.6235
3 жыл бұрын
Liz, you're incredibly brave. Thank you for sharing and helping other people know that it can get brighter. Best wishes!
@leeannegay320
3 жыл бұрын
Wow. Heavy stuff. God bless you Dr. John Delony for helping this woman to start on the healing road. You are awesome and Liz is a brave woman to have taken the steps she already has.
@terrybear5398
3 жыл бұрын
I have great respect for the wonderful work you are doing, Dr. John. God has blessed you . When you said people who have experienced trauma tend to develop "super powers" to cope and survive...that hit me and made total sense. I now can see and understand, with myself, my family and friends that the 'strength' they exhibit may be a coping survival mechanism. Thank you.
@ShadelessGhost
3 жыл бұрын
Delony, you’re a living legend! I wish o could have a 1 on 1 with you in person, because you rock, man!
@KS-cl8br
3 жыл бұрын
Happy for you that you had the strength to move away and that you married a good person. I hope you have a good life. May our creator bless you in both lives.
@luisabatistasamora
6 ай бұрын
What a brave woman. I'm so sorry, Liz, for what happened to you. And I salute you for having the courage to take action and leave.
@ashleysalazar2012
11 ай бұрын
I like that he always calms the caller down by making them laugh
@DanyAcostaOfficial
3 жыл бұрын
Dear Liz. :) I want to thank you for doing something which I hope inspires and encourages so many women out there in a similar situation to open up. I applaud you and I hope you have amazing and incredible people to walk by your side. By the way, to your husband, I pray that he will love you as Christ loves His church. That he will love you, cry with you, and hold you to let you know that despite all of that he is in love with you. I'm sure to an extent he may apologize for not having showed up earlier, but he will be so proud of you and love you for honoring him by sharing with him the most in depths of your heart. You're an amazing woman, role model and wife! Good job :)
@imnotanalky
3 жыл бұрын
Liz, hoping you find peace and healing in your life. It took such courage to share your story.
@roydaniels2549
Жыл бұрын
Dr. John displayed pure excellence in this call. He always does.
@Emmalovesdogsandcats
6 ай бұрын
The Doc is super kind, friendly and understanding. Very sensitive too
@richard3921
3 жыл бұрын
thank you Liz for sharing your story, it might help people who is in the same situation you were in.
@famedvendetta
4 ай бұрын
John took a really roundabout way to make her feel comfortable in conversation before he made her go into the details. Real pro move and one of the reasons I love this show
@brettascott124
2 жыл бұрын
I ❤ this show. Dr. John is an amazing person and knew how to handle this situation. On a second note aside from the victims of this horrific crime anyone involved in sex trafficking should be charged with a capital crime and expediently prosecuted and wiped from the face of the earth
@a.b.2405
2 жыл бұрын
I really think those type of people should get the death penalty. Like for real.
@mickmash-5192
Жыл бұрын
This should include the men that are the buyers. They don’t care that the girls/women they’re ‘renting’ could be trafficked. Men don’t care about this when they watch p**n.
@dumfriesspearhead7398
Жыл бұрын
@@mickmash-5192 Very true. I've also read of men having sex with women who had a lot of bruised on their body, others who beg them to go to the police. They ignore their cries, have sex and leave.
@samanthavasquez3471
3 жыл бұрын
Dr. John you seriously amaze me every time I listen to your podcast or watch your videos and I hear crazy life stories and you always have THE BEST advice to give, you don’t ever not have any advice to say! Thank god for you 🙏🏼 prayers for Liz! 💓
@oceanmistdream1
3 жыл бұрын
She told her husband a lot already and he was accepting. As a VICTIM she is entitled to not be pressured into reliving her nightmares until she feels she is strong enough. That can be traumatic in itself and it doesn’t fix itself overnight. If her husband loves her, like I’m sure he does, he will walk with her through this. She doesn’t owe anyone an apology for marrying him- there is clearly so much love there already and she felt SAFE with him ( that’s a BIG deal). She’s doing the right thing now by asking for help. Not many have that strength and no one has the right to say she “should” have done this or that. You aren’t in her shoes. If her husband decides he can’t handle it, HE isn’t worthy of her love and hand in marriage. Not her. She isn’t tainted goods. She is a human being and I’m so proud of her.
@salma_Nella22
3 жыл бұрын
People who haven’t been through trauma or are close with someone who has experienced this level abuse just think it’s that easy
@zeal4god402
3 жыл бұрын
Yea she is exemplary
@LtGrandpoobah
3 жыл бұрын
I'm not saying it's wrong that she didn't disclose this before marriage. I should've disclosed more than I did about my childhood abuse before marriage. Nevertheless, premarital counseling is exactly the place where this should be disclosed to your future spouse. To anyone looking for advice on this topic, take it from someone who did it the hard way...disclose it to your fiance before you say your vows.
@ravenestrella2310
3 жыл бұрын
@@LtGrandpoobah As a survivor of abuse myself, I can assure you, people need to do this when they are ready. Trying to get someone to disclose this before they are can only lead to further trauma. Simply because what you’re saying is true for you, that does not make it true for everyone else. Every relationship is different. A person needs to listen to their heart on this matter, and follow it, not the opinions of others.
@LtGrandpoobah
3 жыл бұрын
@@ravenestrella2310 Truth isn't relative. If a person isn't ready to disclose their abuse to their fiance in (or before) premarital counseling, then they're not ready to be married.
@elderhollowfarm7043
5 ай бұрын
Brilliant advice. It’s been 20 years since I left my very abusive ex boyfriend and several of these things are still pinging in me. Good luck to this sweet lady 🌺
@TheSimpleMommy
5 ай бұрын
This is so well done. I'm not married anymore, but I am on the other side of my own similar experiences. Learning to love myself as much as I love my kids has been hard. I love that he explains the mindset of someone being abused to the listener so people can be more aware of how hard it is to get out, and how he then changed the conversation from what she feels she owes her husband to what she actually deserves herself (healing, unconditional love, etc.) I hope she got that and then some.
@lambchop6278
2 ай бұрын
One thing this got me thinking is: how many other women in the sex industry got there because of similar abuse and were never willing, and because if that, just seem to be willing (and it's a part of their survival to seem to be).
@san.fre.
4 ай бұрын
Dear dr.john delony the way you talk to people makes you fucking amazing!
@a.geddes6201
Жыл бұрын
Dr. John you are amazing. More than just a brilliant conversationalist and listener. He articulated the real catch-22s of this situation in a way I've never heard before.
@jahbern
3 ай бұрын
This poor girl. She doesn’t need to do this alone. My daughter is 20 and I would bear this burden for her if I could. But for sure I would bear this burden WITH my daughter. If her mom and/or dad are trustworthy, she needs to tell them. They can be part of her healing. And her husband - if he’s a man worth being married to he will do ANYTHING for her. Including helping her bear this pain. She is amazing and she is worth it. She’s worth it.
@phylliscurtner5578
6 ай бұрын
I am so glad you were strong enough to get yourself out of that nightmare situation. I wish you happiness and peace in your life. God bless you ❤
@bradleymaravalli2851
3 жыл бұрын
Liz, thank you for sharing your story and help us all better understand what abuse looks like and how it can happen. I do hope you write up the counselor. I mostly leave people be but wow, John's right. This counselor needs to be notified to the boards and have them look into his/her treatment of clients. He or she is indeed hurting people and prolonging their treatment by shoeing them off.
@user-kv1dt8fs7k
Ай бұрын
You are so amazing Dr. John. You have such a wonderful way of mixing seriousness and “hey, I am so sorry…” with helping the person on the other side of the call feel comfortable enough to laugh. It’s honestly such a beautiful talent. You are a blessing to so many ❤
@ChalkPanther
2 жыл бұрын
This caller broke my heart. Poor girl.
@amythinks
Жыл бұрын
Masterful work making her feel comfortable and calming her down by joking around.
@wildrose5357
11 ай бұрын
The comments about having her disclose before the marriage are so out of place. She is on survival mode 100%. She’s still trying to save her skin. Folks have just no idea how trauma impacts a victim. They can separate if he can’t take it. She needs to heal first. John is so good, as always. I see him being very shaken by this call, more than I’ve even seen. Very very very courageous Liz, wish her all the best❤❤❤
@joimonae4090
3 ай бұрын
no if she has issues she's still dealing with those need to be dealt with first trauma first why would someone be married if they are in survival mode that isn't healthy at all i would make sure i got the help i needed before getting in relationships let alone marriage
@joimonae4090
3 ай бұрын
@@vaska1999 exactly so they need to recover before getting married if the trauma isn't dealt with before the marriage that can have an impact ,no need to be rude i stand firm on what i said however sue me
@vaska1999
3 ай бұрын
@@joimonae4090 Thank you for your reasoned, polite reply. I've retracted my intemperate, rude reaction to your previous comment. I agree that, ideally, we would all heal our psychological wounds before entering a serious relationship. Very often this isn't possible because we aren't even aware of the wounds that need healing until something in our life opens them again and we find ourselves in deep pain and distress. I think that someone who's been sexually abused can't really heal from that trauma except through another, positive relationship combined with individual and even sex therapy.
@kimdelaney9775
3 жыл бұрын
You are so compassionate with people. Grateful for you, Dr. D!
@annbann6
Жыл бұрын
Really well done call.. in every way. Dr.Delony found a way to break the tension at the beginning, to be supportive and give great advice, and even to explain the situation further to the audience to lessen any judgement. Really great work.
@gelflingfay
Жыл бұрын
You sir are very good at helping to get through the fear and nervousness in a person. Providing that safe space and comradery. Excellent. It's exactly what a person needs in a situation like that.
@jessicaclark8579
3 жыл бұрын
OMG I'm Bawling. My heart goes out to you sweet and BRAVE soul! You have come so so so far.
@Moriningland
3 жыл бұрын
John is such a wise and compassionate man. Such a warm and beautiful soul.
@ank7982
4 ай бұрын
What a brave Woman! She went through stuff many powerful people can not even imagine.
@tmusa2002
3 жыл бұрын
She is a very resilient person. Good for her.
@coriemmett1363
5 ай бұрын
Praying this precious woman. I hope she heals through this. ❤️🩹
@trishashaffer8278
Жыл бұрын
My heart just breaks for this woman and what she's been thru. The complete bravery she has.
@supernova11711
Жыл бұрын
Doesn’t have to be a life or death situation for me to understand her not leaving her dogs. I would never leave my dog. They’re a life commitment just like children. She didn’t leave her dogs in the same way you wouldn’t leave your children.
@cindymcwilliams6253
4 ай бұрын
Thank you for understanding and explaining this to people who may not understand. I am so proud of her for leaving. How courageous! Her story will no doubt help others going through something similar.
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