I’ve always said, if you leave your household and no one misses you or even notices you’re gone, you are useless to your household.
@sensimania
Жыл бұрын
Right. My mum was always missed when she went out. Even if she simply went grocery shopping for an hour, without the stress of taking us kids with her on occasion, we would run to the front door and pounce on her as soon as we heard the key in the door, lol! But when my dad went out we were relieved 😂
@vernoniqueomosanya8931
Жыл бұрын
@@sensimania I know the feeling i relate
@foreignbentley173
Жыл бұрын
So true I had a bio dad we never even noticed he was gone but when my mom got with my step dad and we moved we would wait in the garage for him to come home lol. That’s why I refuse to put up with anything my stepdad wish I would 😂
@rz8753
Жыл бұрын
😂
@minmeena
Жыл бұрын
That’s literally how my dad is. He didn’t contribute anything remarkable to remember in the household he wasn’t involved raising us even tho we was literally in the house and there my whole childhood. Even now he goes out of the country like multiple times a year and we don’t notice he’s gone. Nothing changes but the work load
@mikochild2
Жыл бұрын
Men complain that women let themselves go... Men complain about the glow up after she leaves him... Men, you're why.
@Axiom61
2 ай бұрын
PREACH
@Rice10120
Жыл бұрын
That's why women are opting out of this marriage bs. Marriage is a burden on women. Stay single, child free, and happy.
@CordeliaWagner
Жыл бұрын
🎯🎯🎯
@blackdiamond4761
Жыл бұрын
if we don't have children, we're gonna be like Chyna a bunch of old people and no young people.
@sinovuyobudaza7167
Жыл бұрын
That's why I say that the birth rate will continue to decline.
@robinnandersonstudent
Жыл бұрын
Yaassssss 🎉
@Barbieflygerian
Жыл бұрын
I'll take the kid...leave everything else....
@Chocobunnezz
Жыл бұрын
A man paying bills doesnt equate to the needs of the family being met. If mom is chef, doctor , house keeper , soccer driver , budget planner , school preparer , and a shoulder to cry on than dad needs to be ALL of that as well. This is where men drop the ball.
@Tee-Star
Жыл бұрын
No, the woman drops the ball by accepting to offer free labor for another human being. Ratio 1:9😂
@Chocobunnezz
Жыл бұрын
@@Tee-Star Her husband or her children ma'am? 🤨 Another human being can be anyone. Life itself is labor. Having a partner shouldn't make it harder.
@Rice10120
Жыл бұрын
Just reading all of those jobs had me stressed 😂. It's not for me.
@Tee-Star
Жыл бұрын
@@Chocobunnezz Men don't listen, so I'm not wasting energy on u.
@victoriaogunsanya9074
Жыл бұрын
How many of these men pay the bills?
@MsBoss-hi9br
Жыл бұрын
That's why I'm child free
@saramatthews7159
Жыл бұрын
same
@puggs26
Жыл бұрын
I'm married with no kids too. Thank the lord.
@shaypope4732
Жыл бұрын
Same
@queeniequeen949
Жыл бұрын
Same here!! HARD pass!!! 🙅🏾♀️🚫👎🏾
@Maybe-An-Alien
Жыл бұрын
This🙌🏾
@homegirl4614
Жыл бұрын
I'm slowly learning that children are not the problem here....never have been...the real issue is the men we are having babies with
@feefriz
11 ай бұрын
Bingo!
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
Thissss I made a huge mistake
@DewyMoonlight
8 ай бұрын
Men we are having babies with, men in general and the father's of said men.
@ommiohmy
4 ай бұрын
Exactly!!
@alexia8431
3 ай бұрын
That’s the conclusion I’m coming to. I always thought they were blaming it on the kids when they talk about being unloved overworked and unappreciated…now I understand it is THE MEN causing this whole thing.
@twainalex996
Жыл бұрын
I live in China 🇨🇳 they call these women a married widow.
@saloras9500
Жыл бұрын
That’s wild. I’ve heard china refers to unmarried women over a certain age as “leftover” and people display their children in a literal dating market for marriage. Is that true?
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
@@saloras9500it's true and now the new generation is revolting against it
@saloras9500
9 ай бұрын
@@krystingrant6292 well thank god for that
@MsIsma22
7 ай бұрын
😂 married widow
@SuperFunJess
6 ай бұрын
Lmbo married widow? Married but husband is like dead rofl that's a good one, that's a better term than married single mom
@Boots_Alexander
Жыл бұрын
I love/hate how so many women of different cultures are speaking of this and telling their stories. It debunks the "only this culture" argument/excuse.
@Pinesol605
Жыл бұрын
It’s common in the Hispanic community.
@Boots_Alexander
Жыл бұрын
@@Pinesol605 my heart breaks for that 😔😔😔.
@jadibdraws
Жыл бұрын
Of course, it's a global issue thanks to the global oppression of women, but earnestly, it can be more extreme in cultures that shameless display misogyny more so than others. And we can be honest misogyny is a global issue but it is more extreme is some places than others.
@citizencoy4393
Жыл бұрын
Yet these same ppl will mysteriously “forget” tomorrow and be right back on the anti train.
@CyberSecurityFashionDesigner
Жыл бұрын
Arab here…… it’s worse for us! Literally written culturally. If you do not obey, they get rid of you and switch it up to another woman!
@deathdragoncat
Жыл бұрын
It's disgusting how many men are comfortable just working and coming home and doing NOTHING. They don't care how stressed their partner is when their home they get to kick back while you do everything for them.
@GoToSheol
Жыл бұрын
They leave and everyone is relieved lol smh that’s the sad part be sad when they pull up
@deathdragoncat
Жыл бұрын
@@GoToSheol It's unfortunate but I mean the kids tend to not have a connection with him because of that tbh. Plus a lot of men like this when asked to help will be passive aggressive about the fact that they're being asked to help. It's just stressful dealing with it and they just refuse to listen/care.
@GoToSheol
Жыл бұрын
@@deathdragoncat i totally understand and feel you. Nothing is more disappointing than you knowing that they are intentionally doing something wrong on purpose just so you won’t ask them again. When the it’s the wrong person it is devastating but when it’s the right one it’s heavenly.
@Tee-Star
Жыл бұрын
It's disgusting how many women allow it, and shun women who say NO to it. 😅
@GoToSheol
Жыл бұрын
@@Tee-Star complete madness if that’s the case smh
@remixedv
Жыл бұрын
When I tell you the amount of marriages that could've been saved if a man washed the dishes, took out the trash without being told, put the seat down, showed up with flowers of appreciation... The list is BASIC. No quantum physics equation... basic every day chores. Partners get fed up and opt out of raising an adult child. If you even snore... SMH....
@joylastname3035
Жыл бұрын
I absolutely HATE when they ask if they can help you with anything or claim you didn't ask for their help. You live here. You're not helping me, you're participating like an adult with sense in a house you partly made. You need to be told to take the trash out or cook meal?
@LadyAstarionAncunin
Жыл бұрын
I can't remember if it was Switzerland or Sweden, but in one of those countries, they were said to have the happiest marriages and there was a correlation made between how much the men helped in the household (which was highest in the world).
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
if the husband is financially providing for the kids then the wife isn't a "single mother"
@wanderlustoceans8205
10 ай бұрын
@@LadyAstarionAncunin because europe is way better with women i am myself finding more respect with European men than the average American man wish to be honest I dont see any difference between and American man and a middle eastern/Arabic man
@Popularloner86
8 ай бұрын
I think it's all about men taking the initiative in the household a man in my opinion shouldn't be going and asking his wife can I help with anything? Like look around! Women aren't men's supervisor to be giving them task's to do the home is just as much theirs too!
@adfmo2195
Жыл бұрын
I was a married single mother. I am now a divorced single mother with sole custody of my children. We are better off now in every way.
@jereljohnson16
Жыл бұрын
That's not what the stats say...woman lead homes have the worst time raising kids on their own...
@nailahdawkins
Жыл бұрын
There's no such thing as a divorced single mom. You'd just be legally a divorced (marital status) mom. You'll forever be that, unless you re-marry. Idk why but people mix up marital statuses a lot and I'm like how. If someone isn't married it's simplified. If they were married (past) it's either divorced, annulled, widow/widower. If they are a parent, it's just tacked onto the marital status, i.e. widow mom (widow), divorced dad (divorced), etc. I understand the concept (married single mom) however because the burden the woman does over the man, however.
@nightwishisthegreatestband6355
Жыл бұрын
@@jereljohnson16when the father refuses to be involved in the kids' lives. A man on tiktok already debunked your argument with data
@adfmo2195
Жыл бұрын
@@jereljohnson16 thank you. You would know better than me seeing as how you know nothing about my circumstance and do not reside in my household. Lol
@adfmo2195
Жыл бұрын
@@nailahdawkins you seem pretty triggered. Perhaps you should work through your frustrations instead of commenting out of bitterness. Be blessed.
@ednajones3700
10 ай бұрын
I'll never forget the 1st time I met my sister's baby daddy. Her daughter's father is an African man. He wanted to throw a birthday party for her, and this "man" did NOTHING! His girlfriend did damn near everything. He couldn't get her ready He wouldn't help move the furniture, set up balloons...I got so upset and said super loud what is he good for if he can't do the bear minimum for his own kid. He wasn't even footing the bill for the party. I went out to the garage where he was during set up and said,"hey the pool area needs to be cleaned up. We're handling everything else inside. You can do that much, right?" He did it, and those African lady's turned their nose up!😅 started whispering about me😂😂😂 I was like SO!😂😂😂 my sister was cracking up. She said that's what they're like the women do it all, and the men are served. They started to agree, LOL. I said, "That's gross, so y'all men just sit around, and yall cool with that?" All these women had jobs, too, so it wasn't like the guys were the soul providers. I was disgusted.
@MrsSam611
9 ай бұрын
I love this 😂
@bellaymettes5255
8 ай бұрын
Yes me too I’m disappointed and disgusted👑
@kecym.4808
8 ай бұрын
damn, hope ur sister left
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
I’ll never understand why some women let their men get away with doing nothing smh
@alexia8431
3 ай бұрын
As an African myself all I can say is welcome to the community. Women are responsible for basically everything and the ones that call it out are made to look like problems like you were
@SianLondon
Жыл бұрын
This married single mother/wife concept is so true, I know a few of them and not only do they do everything for and in the home / with the children, they're also the breadwinners! I'm not judging anyone who CHOSES this dynamic, it's just not for ME.
@quandraadams7583
Жыл бұрын
Tf is the husband, a fixture? He is getting OVA!! 😅
@angelface3039
Жыл бұрын
I have seen this. The sad part is when the woman thinks she got a prize.
@levelupgoddess9289
Жыл бұрын
It’s a HELL NO for me.
@e113jelly6
Жыл бұрын
Women paying for d**k is rapid these days city Boys up
@ieshjust16
Жыл бұрын
@homeworkforgirlsshe enabled that behavior. You don't have to accept that for your like, but she chose that
@kyaos_Meteor
Жыл бұрын
Everyday its getting more and more difficult defending the "Every child needs a father" or "Families function better under a two parent household" especially after watching a dude casually walking pass his son who is crying complaining to the "Wife" about it instead of you know tending to his sons needs
@truffaut650truffaut6
10 ай бұрын
My children don't even want to see the X.
@DewyMoonlight
8 ай бұрын
It feels personally offensive and it didn't even happen to me😂
@sabrinagonzales4456
2 ай бұрын
2 parent household my ass, that’s the problem lol. Single and childfree is the way.
@Aja-Christian
Жыл бұрын
Having a husband sounds a lot like just having another kid 🙁 Like I know it's "not ALL men" but it's enough men out here like this for it to be a problem. Like society keep trying to push marriage and motherhood onto women like it's the answer to everything but it clearly isn't, and then people have the audacity to try and come down on those of us who opt out completely like *we're* doing something wrong. What exactly am I supposed to feel like I'm missing out on exactly?
@Bubileaf
Жыл бұрын
Yup, the gaslighting and projection of their misery is strong. It’s all about Control and Envy. Stick to your convictions, be smart, protect yourself. Women, you are the gatekeepers to sex and your womb. Please don’t settle. 🙏🏼
@Nitra813
Жыл бұрын
Yeah it’s really a toss up out here dealing with men. 😅 Honestly I’d say most issues come since the wife is pregnant and start popping out children. The happiest couples I know got married and waited years before starting a family. Marriage is the most beautiful thing honestly. I’ve seen it done well. It’s most honorable. They key us to marry someone who understands you and actually cares about your well being. Be sure you LIKE them. Oh and go to pre marital counseling. Have those difficult conversations and find out their true character and discuss each others expectations for everything. So many are desperate for marriage they skip the engagement and counseling just to keep their person to themselves.
@Nitra813
Жыл бұрын
Oh and be careful listening to those who “push” marriage on other women. Marriage shouldn’t be taken lightly or rushed into. Those women most likely are miserable and you know the saying: Misery loves company.
@laplusbelle7982
Жыл бұрын
It is like having another kid, that’s why I don’t understand women who brag about their marriages or people who act marriage is the best thing since slice bread…😅
@TheCarnivoreSoprano
Жыл бұрын
Most of them.
@Childfree334
Жыл бұрын
Funny thing is, I got divorced because I knew I would end up like this if I gave into my husband's desire to have kids. He got me pregnant, I got an abortion the next day, then a divorce 4 months later. Single and childfree for me.
@kittykatz4001
Жыл бұрын
S/O to you 🎉! It’s unbelievable when married women have that first child, and their husband doesn’t help with ANYTHING, then the go on to have 3 more kids with the trash unhelpful husband! Sis, you are a “G!” You got clean away with your life intact! By the time these broads wake up to leave, with 4 kids, it’s over. Can’t feel sorry when the husband didn’t step it up when they had their first child, and then girlfriend has 3 more! If women like this dumb ish, I love ❤️ it!
@Heyu7her3
Жыл бұрын
Birth control, y'all... and have these conversions before the marriage license
@foreveralchemy3193
Жыл бұрын
@@Heyu7her3True. But another conversation needs to be had about men switching up after marriage & becoming sick or quitting jobs. Saying they want a child. Leaving the wife to do everything cause they've trapped her. Conversations mean nothing to intentional liars.
@Quilt4Joy
Жыл бұрын
Smart
@Childfree334
Жыл бұрын
@Heyu7her3 We did have the childfree conversation before marriage, which is why I married him. He assured me he never wanted kids. 4 years in he "changed his mind" but didn't bother telling me. I knew he was trying to use a kid to get at my assets, so I flipped the script on his azz.
@Camie.in.Philly
Жыл бұрын
I'm America, this is the reason for the high rate of women filing for divorce. I can do bad by myself. Notice, these are women from around the world with the same complaint. This is why the birth rate is lowering every year. Women are sick and tired. The men don't understand that the work they do is nothing like the work of their fathers. If you're not walking 2 hours to and from work everyday and working 16 hour shifts in the factory lifting bags of concrete into the machine, please don't think you're going to come home and flop in your favorite chair and think I'm not going to say something. And this is also one of the best relationship shows I've ever seen. They look at it from EVERY angle, both right and wrong. Check it out.
@2okaycola
Жыл бұрын
This! Working 6 hours three days a week isn't impressive 🙃 you're a grown man right? Might be kudos for a teen but a thirty yo?!
@amandaford8730
Жыл бұрын
Yup this is something that's uniting women of every race and nationality.
@elsugga3736
Жыл бұрын
The amount of successful unions is soooo small that I’d rather not take the risk
@azureavocado5195
Жыл бұрын
Women aren’t even bearing in mind how many of us are *getting murdered out here by our husbands!!* No thanks.😂
@elsugga3736
Жыл бұрын
@@azureavocado5195 killed, graped, abandoned, beat and what not
@mjohnson1741
10 ай бұрын
56% failure rate 🤷♀️
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
Same. Happily ever after is only in fairytales. Big nope from me
@QueenofZamunda2023
Жыл бұрын
Mine thought having a job is all that's required of him. He was part of the furniture really. I called him the saint of pointless causes. I asked, begged, cried, negotiated that he not treat himself like a clueless guest in our home. The whole giant of a man would use the bathroom in complete darkness because I did not change the light bulb. I am now happy, stress free and divorced. He thought i was bluffing. I'ts the 21st century, ladies. If a man teaches you not to need him, learn the lesson. You will be just fine.
@rebeccadelbridge2998
Жыл бұрын
Preach!!!!
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
This shi here
@annaiuga
3 ай бұрын
Mine too was a piece of furniture, totaly usless. Never hed any realtionship with his daughter. All he did all day long was smooking and watching netflix. So I got out of that stupid marriage and I am way better now.
@Darline_ox
Жыл бұрын
my mom was a single married mom of 4, she did a fantastic job raising us while my dad was just there smh then he's wondering why we're closed to my mom but not him
@coachbrit5107
Жыл бұрын
Same
@YaaAgubyKete
Жыл бұрын
They always wonder and project that the mom turned kids against them lol its so pathetic
@egresham02
Жыл бұрын
Same. I would talk more about my mom than I did about my dad with people. I think people thought I was raised by a single mom, but I actually came from a two-parent household.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If your dad was financially providing for you then your mom wasn't a "single mom."
@youreincredible1648
10 ай бұрын
@@ivanivez7456she said single married mum there is a difference, re watch the video to understand where the term is from.
@savagesweetheart90
Жыл бұрын
One more reason not to have children Stand firm ladies
@shaypope4732
Жыл бұрын
Yup
@bbloopy
Жыл бұрын
@ savagesweetheart7476, well that’s silly.. so women shouldn’t have children and shouldn’t get married? What exactly should we be doing? Focusing on our careers and other achievements? Last time I checked their are women crying all over the internet about not having a man and family. We are social beings and need companionship. Take the good with the bad and learn to choose appropriately.
@strawberribubbletea
Жыл бұрын
@@bbloopy some women are happy with that. Not every woman wants to be a mother. And the women who do chose to be a mother, they still need to be super cautious and prepare to be doing everything for the kids and the household bc men will promise one thing and deliver another, and they also need to keep financial independence in case the man is abusive or bails.
@savagesweetheart90
9 ай бұрын
@@bbloopy As a law student that briefs about 15-20 cases a week for criminal law, the amount of cases that I have read about parents killing their children and vice versa is astounding. There are PLENTY of people who shouldn't have children but do anyways and we later hear about those children on the news. I chose appropriately because I know that a child will be a burden to me and my life and never liked children even as a child myself. Statistics show that women who are single and childless/childfree are more happier than their married counterparts and the only group that comes close is married men. And the people who consciously make the decision to not have any children don't regret it at all because they know themselves better than some stranger on the internet. Look into why there is a global decline in birth rates, I'd rather be financially stable without children than be in debt just to fulfill a fucked up society. You want children, good for you. Learn to respect other peoples' decisions and not try to force others in your cookie-cutter world that they want no part in. Also, would you say the same to men who choose this lifestyle too or just shame women??
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
@@bbloopy”what should we be doing.” Anything we want to do. It’s your life. Live it how you want
@Autumn-zd9nq
Жыл бұрын
I was almost a married single mother. All he did was propose. Nothing else. I did everything in the household on my own and paid half the bills. He would have an attitude if I required assistance from him. He never gave me money to take a break and get my tired feet done. I couldn’t even ask him for gas money because he’d be mad that he had a real responsibility to his future wife. I tried to talk to him about. I tried to overlook him neglecting me and the baby but I was miserable and couldn’t commit to that for the rest of my life. I gave him back his ring and realized I would lighten my load by ditching his selfish ass.
@jaddek.astrie3071
4 ай бұрын
Good job. ❤
@adsmith1226
2 ай бұрын
❤❤❤
@DaBoMiCl
Жыл бұрын
I think people are forgetting the 3 part. Its not just raising kids and doing the house work mostly by yourself. Its also holding down the fort financially with little to no help from your spouse. This is gonna be a long one. My mom is the exact definition of a married single mom. She did all the cooking and cleaning until my brother and I got old enough to help out. She worked from 8 to 6 every day and nights a couple times a week. She payed half of the mortgage and most of the utilities. My dad was out of the house from dawn till midnight and rarely cooked even though he was a chef. He would regularly not pay his half of the mortgage and utilities. At least once a year his side of utility's would be cut off. When questioned hed say they lost his check, he didn't have any money. So she would pick up more hours to pay those bills. And it happened for years. Shes never left and now hes sick so shes doing even more. She might as well not be married. Update time: She is divorcing him and moving out. I guess she decided enough was enough. Her healing has begun. Thank you everyone for your prayers.
@TEWMUCH
Жыл бұрын
So stressful and annoying!
@Heyu7her3
Жыл бұрын
It's sad your mom has enabled this for so long and still is. Godspeed to her
@Quilt4Joy
Жыл бұрын
Wow, and the sad part, he doesn’t even care about her well being.
@DaBoMiCl
Жыл бұрын
@@Heyu7her3 She is the kind of person who believes that people will change and you just have to keeping pushing. But he's been doing this for over 20 years nows. They grew up together and he's her first love. She doesn't know anything else.
@DaBoMiCl
Жыл бұрын
@@Quilt4Joy He really doesn't. I could tell stories about this man and their relationship. But it's too sad to think about.
@lashondablue4010
Жыл бұрын
Yes! Yes! Yes! I was a married single mom and instead of trying to get my ex-husband to understand his roles/responsibilities in the marriage, I chose to divorce him. I was already doing everything on my own as he contracted overseas for years, coming to visit us once or twice a year for two weeks at a time. The female in the video who mentioned that if your spouse died or you divorce him and nothing changes is a clear sign that you’re a married single mom. She was absolutely correct. 💯💯💯
@jaijai5250
Жыл бұрын
The only difference is that lone, single mothers are the sole financial providers for the home, whilst doing everything else. Married, single mothers often have someone paying all the bills, or half of the bills.
@lashondablue4010
Жыл бұрын
In some cases, but not all. I’m retired military and when I was married to my ex-husband there were times he couldn’t even afford to pay all of the utilities while I paid the mortgage. He contracted overseas, but claim to have had so much debt that he needed to get himself out of. While I understand your point, there are women who are literally just married on paper as their husbands do nothing. Not even providing financially. Which is pointless to even be married at that point. Personally, I can relate to the topic of this video.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If he was financially providing for the family then you wasn't a "single mom."
@lashondablue4010
10 ай бұрын
I’m sorry but it takes more than finances to raise a child. Sending money only doesn’t make a person a parent. It solely keeps them out of jail. When one parent provides financially, emotionally, spiritually, academically and the overall well being of the child as the other parent neglects their responsibilities. I disagree. But hey you’re entitled to your opinion and so am I. Based on your response you’ve missed the entire point of the video.🤦🏾♀️
@lashondablue4010
10 ай бұрын
I’m sorry but it takes more than finances to raise a child. Sending money only doesn’t make a person a parent. It solely keeps them out of jail. When one parent provides financially, emotionally, spiritually, academically and the overall well being of the child as the other parent neglects their responsibilities. I disagree. But hey you’re entitled to your opinion and so am I. Based on your response you’ve missed the entire point of the video.🤦🏾♀️
@mikochild2
Жыл бұрын
If the only thing you contribute as a man is your check, there's no difference between that and putting you on child support. And they wonder why their children only think about them when they want something. Sir, that's the relationship you created.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother." Taking care of kids isn't just nurturing. It involves financial support: the roof over their heads, the food, clothes etc. You get it now? A wife and a single mother aren't the same and never will be. A wife has commitment. A single mother never got commitment in the first place. Also kids from a single mother don't have a father in the household
@mikochild2
10 ай бұрын
@ivanivez7456 no honey, commitment does not raise children. Commitment doesn't alleviate wear and tear and stress. If a man is nothing but a check, then there is no reason to complain about single mothers. They aren't getting much less than the wife did. You are basically saying that men are useless outside of a check. That fathers are unimportant and easily replaced. Whoever can provide the check is your replacement. It takes more than one person to raise children, especially if you don't want one the person raising them to burn out and resent you. The same way you get time off daily (the end of your shift), weekends, holidays, and sick leave, mom needs time to recharge. How does she get that time if dad doesn't participate? And men wonder why fathers day isn't that big of a deal to many and why many fathers are forgotten. You have to be present to be thought about. You have to build bonds for them to exist. If you never gave any more than a check someone's entire life, don't get angry later when you're craving relationship and they only want your check.
@butterscotch2086
5 ай бұрын
That depends on how much of his check he contributes to major bills. Most women don’t get much in child support. If he pays all the major bills then child support isn’t better.
@paid2talk298
Жыл бұрын
At this point , I should just stay single and child free
@annah5507
Жыл бұрын
U will statistically be much happier and better off 🎉
@Alexis-ec9cl
Жыл бұрын
I think I will too. My ex ruined me.
@aussieginger1960
7 ай бұрын
This was my choice, l am very happy with decisions.
@samkaybeauty2862
Жыл бұрын
Nobody I mean nobody is convincing me about motherhood! I'll stay childfree for life!
@ChainBreakerswithDrTrista
Жыл бұрын
Same Sis!
@Childfree334
Жыл бұрын
🙋🏾♀️Same here. Those few fuzzy moments of being a parent are far outweighed by the negative. Hard pass!!!
@MysteriousVirScorpio
Жыл бұрын
Men are not versatile mates. Once women realize this, they'll move accordingly.
@shaspearman8647
11 ай бұрын
My ex told me that “the kids will be my responsibility” and laughed about it. I told him not to joke about that, he never apologized or said he was kidding. We ultimately divorced, because I didn’t believe that he was going to be a good father, or father at all. He had the audacity to ask that we have kids anyway after the divorce, just so he can have progeny
@DewyMoonlight
8 ай бұрын
My sister's baby daddy also told her her life is going to change, not his life.
@makeitcount2985
Ай бұрын
That's all they want to do, spread their seed but not be partners to their wives and do very little with their kids 🤷
@rosannawispe9774
Жыл бұрын
Yes!! married single mom over here. My husband is useless. 10 years, 7 children and he washed the dishes twice. I’m so tired, frustrated, no days off. I have barely enjoyed my kids. I’ve wanted a divorce but he doesn’t want to leave. I’m financially stuck because I’m too tired and busy to even work from home. I sleep about 5 hrs a night. I’m dead. And on top of all that and more he has treated me like I’m worthless. Our kids could careless if he is here or not. Cause when he is here it’s as if he wasn’t.
@askajk5895
8 ай бұрын
"I barely enjoyed my children", is the worst part of all this!! We are so stressed and overwhelmed. What little we have left is all our children get. They don't get the mother you really want to give them. Drop the man because the emotional stress, damage and pain he causes, hurts our children!!!
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
“Our kids could care less if he’s here.” Because he’s not. Kids know when a parent doesn’t care about them
@magnarcreed3801
6 ай бұрын
Give him the kids and dip. F that.
@butterscotch2086
5 ай бұрын
That’s a tough situation but single mothers also have to work on top of all the household duties.
@alexia8431
3 ай бұрын
Sending you love!!! I am genuinely sorry he took away your opportunity to enjoy your kids!! What kind of heartless man is that. SMH I hope your days of living like that are numbered. Honestly. No mom deserves that💯💯
@levelupgoddess9289
Жыл бұрын
This is one of the main reasons I chose to be childfree. I never wanted to be a single mother and as far as I saw once growing up, u have a 90 percent chance of being a single mother. I always said NOPE. NO. If anyone is gonna be the single parent, it’s me. No thank u. Married single mother is not a new term so it’s strange ppl are acting like this is new. I knew this term since I was like 12. I’m glad the woman at 9:20 woke it up. This is 99 percent of Black households WORLDWIDE. MOST black males are useless when they are actually in the home. That Asian woman is talking crap.
@azureavocado5195
Жыл бұрын
Same. I used to make hello kitty screen prints as a TEEN that said “non-breeder.” My mom hated meeee. Oh well! 😂
@VeeKayGreenerGrass
Жыл бұрын
I agree. In African cities, women who work outside the home have to hire a househelp to step in where the husband should. Her househelp becomes her co-parent, literally. I've often pointed out that the reason we women in African cities need househelps is because we are married single parents.
@queeniequeen949
Жыл бұрын
OMG! You nailed this one!!!!! These are my EXACT thoughts!! People will NEVER understand until they have to go through it. 💯💯💯💯💯
@noniboo1521
Жыл бұрын
@azureavocado5195 Your mom knew you meant her!! 😆😅🤣. Good thing you understood that at an early age.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother"
@pageturningpriestess2859
Жыл бұрын
I knew a woman who was a married single mother. The dad walked out and spontaneously moved to another state to "find himself". She ended up relocating and he had her almost on the verge of homelessness. I also remember in my twenties, I babysat for a woman with four kids. Her husband was a football coach and he barely knew how to take care of his children. There were at least two instances where he almost put the children in mortal danger. One was a fire that almost got out of control and the other was a dangerous temperature change in relation to their infant. These two stories influenced my decision to always be prepared and to choose a partner who is actually involved, not a man-child.
@CordeliaWagner
Жыл бұрын
How do women choose to breed with these lowlifes? How can you know the father won't totally change when you are pregnant or after birth?
@MsMookalate
Жыл бұрын
Oh snap I thought you was talking about me in the beginning😅. I’m like who’s this😂🤣😂🤣
@MsMookalate
Жыл бұрын
@@CordeliaWagneryou never know. The switch up after the kids are already here.
@pageturningpriestess2859
Жыл бұрын
@@CordeliaWagner Exactly. On the surface, they all seemed like "nice' guys but turned into nightmares. You really can't tell because some of them are master manipulators and won't show until years later. The only things I think a woman should have if she DOES decide to take the risk of marriage is to: 1. Always have your own money separate from your spouse. They don't have to know about it either. 2. Have your own social circle outside of the marriage. Some women lose their circle(s) and immerse themselves into their marriage. The circle is a good support group to have in case things go awry. 3. Keep practicing self-esteem, self-love, and self-care. Some women will not leave a toxic marriage because they gave up their identities at their vows. They are afraid that leaving will make them look like a failure. Taking care of oneself is like a buffer to that emotion. 4. Figure out how to outsource tasks and streamline your life. If the woman does decide to become an unmarried single mother, one way to make the transition and lessen a potential struggle is to find ways to free up time. Maybe she could practice meal prep or have a budget for an online assistant or person to do tasks like laundry, groceries, etc. if she can afford it. Figuring out small solutions to lessen the sudden changes can make a difference.
@nightwishisthegreatestband6355
Жыл бұрын
@@CordeliaWagnerunless you are breeding with a man who already had kids and you can see his level of involvement in raising them, you are playing Russian roulette
@angelface3039
Жыл бұрын
Imagine if he don’t work, and you still in married single mom. I have seen it.
@linseypollack2309
Жыл бұрын
If his leisure comes at the expense of your labor you aren't partners, you're the staff.
@symonelewis1690
Жыл бұрын
In too many marriages, the woman is the only one being a parent to the kid(s). That is a huge problem! 😳 😢
@CordeliaWagner
Жыл бұрын
That's why you should take time with breeding or, better, buy quality semen and move in with a mommy Community.
@gabrielleabraham5773
Жыл бұрын
Facts
@comfort2023
Жыл бұрын
And there are some fathers who don't know what shoe size their children wear, grades that they are in, dates of births of their children... the list is endless.
@littlelady9801
11 ай бұрын
A lot of men don't even know how old their kids are
@Izlandprincess1
11 ай бұрын
Listen this is so true as a teacher when the dad for whatever reason have to fill in for the mom at school and they are lost....I feel so embarrassed for them not knowing anything about their kids. I would assume they aren't married to the mom but when I realise they are actually married to the mom it's even more embarrassing.
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
How are they not embarrassed of not know their kids birthday?!
@Aja-Christian
Жыл бұрын
Something else this video just made me think about. . .Ladies I know a lot of us have been spoon fed the Hallmark movie version of marriage, but something I've realized over the years is that A LOOOT of men don't actually WANT to be married themselves. What they WANT is a live in sex worker/maid/servant/personal chef/baby maker/personal assistant/personal therapist. But what they DON'T want to do is have to pay for those services separately, so they figure throwing a ring at someone and saying "I Do" is their best option, which it is. But once they secure that, they're good to go. It's also why these are the same men who try to talk sh*t about women who are unmarried and childfree by choice. They deep down know that the more women learn how to be happy and whole without them, the more men in general will be left to their own devices. They would prefer to gaslight, coerce and manipulate women into settling for acceptable permanent levels of unhappiness and settle for miserable marriages, rather than seeing us thrive in ways they can benefit from.
@Bubileaf
Жыл бұрын
Yup 👏🏼 LOUDER FOR THOSE IN THE BACK! It’s so true
@fayolasaunders6342
Жыл бұрын
This comment should be pinned. This is exactly what men want. I watched one redpill video and in the comments a man said he didn't want to be with women because we are all xyz he was just looking for a "womb" for his legacy. Some men know exactly what they are doing.
@Jenny-hk6eg
Жыл бұрын
Look at Oprah and you will understand why she didn’t marry.
@Childfree334
Жыл бұрын
@@Jenny-hk6egYep, Oprah is my relationship twin. I deal with men on my own terms. No marriage and no babies.
@shaypope4732
Жыл бұрын
This is why I'm not risking leaving a legacy for someone that don't have to put their body through anything for carrying that legacy...im good
@veggieeater
Жыл бұрын
My grandmother cooked and cleaned for four children all her life. Her husband worked, but he never ever cooked, except for when my grandmother was in the hospital. After grandfather died, she never wanted to remarry, never even wanted to live with her children. I think this is her way of having independence finally for over 50 years. She was sick of cooking. And like one of these ladies said, your role/shift never ends; it's ongoing whereas a man gets to clock out at 4:30pm and comes home expecting to be treated like royalty.
@ayanna439
Жыл бұрын
A lot of these content creators need to give Cyn G her props because she was the first to make "married single mom" widely known on YT.
@TheCarnivoreSoprano
Жыл бұрын
🎉🎉🎉
@debmoore6520
Жыл бұрын
I keep saying some of the loneliest people are married 🤷🏿♀️
@ADR-xn6dg
Жыл бұрын
I swear I was more lonely being married than not. I cried more too, was stressed more, took care of myself less and looked a haggard mess 9/10 times. I still take care of my children like I did before but less stress involved, less crying and overall happier. Then when I think about those good times we did have, he opens his mouth and reminds me why I left 😂
@dablakespace
Жыл бұрын
My mom, my step mom and all the women of my family were single mothers... and married. That’s why I can't even think of being with a man who's not involved and mature. That’s why I'm not even sure if I want children or not
@monimuppet6132
Жыл бұрын
"I can do bad all by myself." That is exactly it. It is nearly impossible to explain to someone that uses "you're going to die alone" as a shaming tactic, just how deep and dark and hopeless loneliness can truly get. You cannot scare a person, that has experienced and endured the pitch black chasm of sharing a life with someone that does not see you, with the prospect of dying single. When I'm by myself I have the certainty of knowing exactly what I can accomplish in a day and what I cannot. Yes, it is difficult parenting and living alone, but the peace of mind gained through knowing what will and won't get done - especially after living years with a person that let you down at every turn even when you were begging for their assistance - is indescribable. For my own life, I know beyond all doubts, that being a single mother is worlds better than being a married single mother. Anyone that tries to tell me how much I'll regret being single eventually, is way out of their depth. You know nothing of the loneliness I experienced. Sometimes I wish I could show it these people, bottle the feeling and let them drink it like a serum, but I'm not that cruel.
@TheBrief-mv7hm
Жыл бұрын
"you're going to die alone" if his show(the game) is on at the time, if it's hunting season, if it's poker night... There is more to life than the minute you die.
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
Being alone is less lonely than being with someone who makes you feel alone
@Childfree334
Жыл бұрын
ATTENTION ALL SINGLE WOMEN: Raise your hand if, even after seeing this video and thousands like it, you are STILL going to get married and have kids. You have been warned, you see the reality, but you are determined to have your Disney fairytale. No judgment here. I'm just curious.
@azureavocado5195
Жыл бұрын
They’ll never admit it, but I bet it’s the majority of the chicks watching this😂 It’s crazy that nobody’s even mentioning how many of us are being murdered by these men we call our “husbands”. So many women are literally dying due to penis, and it is sickening to me. *Everybody’s just OK with it.* 😮 _Think about the # of women who die due to: domestic murders, maternal mortality, cervical cancer (which mainly comes from HPV, which is probably contracted from a male)/other STI‘s, stress, diabetes/high bp aggravated by pregnancy, etc._
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
I have kids but no desire to marry nor have anymore children
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
I wanted kids not marriage - I see men as sperm donors as their incapable of love and how to be parents/ fathers
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
@@IndiTol-pi1wkexactly 💯 I can afford to take care of my kids as I'm a business owner - ❤
@nailahdawkins
Жыл бұрын
I'm going to be a DINKs! I'm waiting for marriage for many reasons including intercourse and I'm child-free. I'm in my early 30s and since obviously tried there hardest to snatch me up early I'm not trying my hardest to make *ANY* of these men a dad 😊. I'd rather explore the world, stack money, form some businesses, and be married 🌟 all without the pain, expense, emotional/physical labor of being an unappreciated, tired, and busy mom!
@MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis
Жыл бұрын
My sister-in-law is a married single mother. Let me tell you she did everything, EVERYTHING for her spouse, and her children. He literally only worked his 9 hour day, then came home and went to the basement to watch TV. I once saw her hosting a family dinner, her husband was overweight and she was thin right. So she always used to get him a plate and give it to him, then serve the kids then eat standing up while cleaning or whatever. She finally sat down (only to nurse the baby) and she asked him to get up and check on the kids, and he looked over at her and said “that’s not my job. I worked all day.” Being a mom is working all day!! She was working far more than 50 hours per week. Plus she was hosting a dinner, and she was literally ALWAYS busy. He was so lazy.
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
Heartbreaking
@MarieAntoinetteandherlittlesis
9 ай бұрын
@@krystingrant6292 Absolutely infuriating.
@Basic190
Жыл бұрын
And men complaining that she has let herself go and that’s why he had the affair 🤯
@chitlinjuice
Жыл бұрын
The older I got, the more I realized my own mother was a married, single mother. I felt so bad for her bc she was ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS TIRED. She worked, cooked, cleaned, planned trips, did our hair, helped with homework, packed lunches, ran errands, coordinated vacations, everything. By the time I was 12, I remember I started doing the laundry for the whole house. I started watching the Food Network bc I wanted to learn how to cook bomb meals so I can help out my mom. I started asking my best friends for rides to and after school before I got my car so my mom wouldn't have to pick me up. I got into sports and cheerleading and told my mom to take a break, you don't have to come to every game on a Thursday night after you've worked all day. Especially bc I was in 3 sports during school. I specifically remember for a while, after my mom got off work to pick me up from school, she would go to the grocery store to get a 5 Hour Energy Drink. This would be after 5:30 PM. 😢 I started asking my dad to take me to my games on weekends so my mom can relax, but I coined it as, let's have "daddy daughter day." I became very self sufficient early on bc my mom was burned out and tired from doing all the heavy work. I kind of resent my dad bc even though he worked, he didn't help out at home a lot. They're still married but I'm grown with my own home, job, and life so idk if he's improved. But seeing how my parents' marriage was made me not want to have kids or even be married. I just turned 30. I'm childfree, single, in grad school, started 2 businesses and I planned my next Bali trip for next year. I'm content. Thank God 🎉
@DestinyUteh
Жыл бұрын
God bless you and your mom. Always choose you and be happy. Bail trip 🤗🤩can I come
@Mira-gu6we
Жыл бұрын
You are the kind of daughter id wish for. I pray the divine mother blesses me.
@UrbanAlchemystic
10 ай бұрын
You are such sweet and thoughtful daughter, and you didn't have to do that at all but wanted to because you saw your mom struggle. ❤ Best of luck with everything sweetie!
@makeitcount2985
Ай бұрын
I saw the same thing with my dad, my brothers married, I didnt... I'm not being a servant to a man who barely helps me and expects me to do everything
@YThates
Жыл бұрын
My mom tried to raise me to only satisfy my kids and my man. She could never understand why when I was a teenager she'd try to put misogynistic and unfair ideals of relationships and life on me and I'd get angry and argue. She used to tell me my man will always cheat on me and I'll never be happy in the future if I don't act like a traditional woman who gets walked all over and supports it. I've been with my current husband for 12 years, we've only been married for 1.5. I do not want kids with him if he cannot start by taking better care of our home. He doesn't do enough to clean or take care of pets for me to even want kids with him. I fear if I have kids with him now, I will end up divorcing him for being useless. Men are so quick to give up and get stressed at responsibilities but women are quick to suck it up and take all the burden. I want the father of my kids to have the same strength and passion as a single mom.
@Tee-Star
Жыл бұрын
That's a fantasy bc they aren't biologically wired that way. Just pray he does the best that's acceptable bybu.😊
@YThates
Жыл бұрын
@@Tee-Star You don't have the science to back that up. But the science we do have is that people are the result of their environment more than their nature. That's why we have social constructs, that's why we have different cultures. Biological wiring speaks to people's IMPULSIVE behaviors. A man being lazy and uncaring of his responsibilities is taught by example and enablement, it is not impulsive behavior.
@zenya9620
Жыл бұрын
@@Tee-Starso why is it then that some do if it's a biological anomaly
@wanderlustoceans8205
10 ай бұрын
Na just divorce and adopt a child if you really want kids badly those kids needs parents really badly
@42ayla
Жыл бұрын
When my girls were little my big break for the week was grocery shopping. I'd leave them with their dad and spend twice as long as I needed to sipping a coffee and insisting people could have my spot in line because I wasn't in a hurry. I only earned that weekly reprieve after forcing my husband to take them to the store to pick up a few things. He couldn't deal with a single 15 minute trip but wanted me to take them every week for the big haul. Two in diapers for over an hour. I remember what a treat that chore was. Now I look back and think how sad it was I felt that way.
@noniboo1521
Жыл бұрын
The married single mother has been around for hundreds of years, but we never gave it its proper name before; married single mom. We just rolled with the punches/struggle without calling it what it really is. I was once one and never thought about the fact that I was actually a single mother. I'm glad to see women talking about this, and just maybe you should discuss this with a future partner. Find out what type of man we are marrying before we do.
@Heyu7her3
Жыл бұрын
"Married single mom" includes the part about contributing to household finances, which didn't happen en masse til recently. Before, it was simply "gender roles"
@biblethumper8088
Жыл бұрын
Or just stay away from them since so many men are doing this.
@amab1853
Жыл бұрын
Right. Women have been experiencing it for centuries most likely. But now there's a term for it and women sharing their experiences show how common it is
@biblethumper8088
Жыл бұрын
Why is it that when men are the problem, women take it upon themselves to find different ways to deal with men instead of just leaving them alone? If women stopped having sex with men, do you really think they would try to figure out how they could still be with women? No they wouldn't. Men have standards and they don't compromise, but women like y'all always degrade yourselves to be with men that don't benefit you. It's so desperate, low value and pathetic. No wonder men have been doing this for centuries. Y'all ask to be degraded.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother"
@Red-Iceberg
Жыл бұрын
My ex husband was that! I divorced him and went to work full time and he did more after I got rid of him. I moved on and let him live exactly as he wanted. I refuse to be miserable and concern myself with what he wont/cant do.
@MiaBellaxOx
11 ай бұрын
Yes! People are always asking how I do it as a single mother of 3? And I am thinking how do YOU do it? I hold zero resentment, I understand I am responsible for my children, so I handle my business and am also intentional about taking care of myself. I am in a better place mentally, emotionally, financially as a single parent than I ever was in a relationship.
@tribecalledmaya
11 ай бұрын
💓
@butterflyeffect888
2 ай бұрын
Period 🙌🏾
@Lovely_Diva
Жыл бұрын
Im a single mom of two and its alot of work being a single parent. I feel embarrassment for the married single moms because theyre supposed to have it better than us single parents. If any woman is in that situation she needs to file for divorce asap. A man should not only work but also do house chores and help raise the kids. My mom was a married single mom and she put up with my dads crap for decades and is still married to him smh. When I was the only child he was Mr. mom and would cook clean etc. After my sister was born he stopped doing all those things but he would tend a bit to my sister and me. But once my brother was born both my parents mentally checked out. And started making me babysit those kids 247 even though i was very young myself. And started having me clean the house etc. By the age of thirteen I pretty much did everything in the house minus the cooking smh. At one point my mom was working double shifts while my dad refused to work. She was the breadwinner for over a decade. And my dad would always talk down to her like she was a peasant smh
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
Single mom of 3 and I would feel betrayed doing it all
@Lovely_Diva
Жыл бұрын
@@77kc_77 Right!!!!!
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
@@Lovely_Diva 💜❤️🙏🏽💕 we are so strong and powerful 💪 🙌 🙏🏽 women globally have been bamboozled! We're waking up to the lies of men collectively we should stand in solitary and support each other
@Lovely_Diva
Жыл бұрын
@@77kc_77 ❤️❤️❤️👍👍🙏🙏💞💞
@UrbanAlchemystic
10 ай бұрын
Such a shame that daughters are put to work at such young ages
@kittywiththeblackhat
Жыл бұрын
Between this and the things some men do to make birth worse I'm confused why anyone wants to have children or marry?!
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
Right
@CordeliaWagner
Жыл бұрын
Breeding keeps the partriachial capitalism going. It's an act of rebellion to keep your womb clean.
@iiceeglam
Жыл бұрын
@@Liz-wz8dhthat’s not true. Some ppl don’t come from horrible families so therefore they desire their own. Even with my mom being a single mom, she’s had a large and great village so I never viewed motherhood as a negative thing, single or coupled because my grandparents are married and he was very active. My grandparents kept us every summer so my mom would get a break. My grandpa would do bible study with us, made me milo to drink with him when he had his night tea. He took us to the beach by himself and took care of us. When my mom still lived in the same state he’d sometimes pick me up from daycare for her. When she moved to a new state and only took me, my grandparents watched my brother and sister until the school year was done. So it depends on what life has been for you.
@lillybilly9954
Жыл бұрын
By the way, most married single mothers also work. I’m married and I will be the first to tell you the wife/mother gets the short end of the stick 9 out of 10 times. And married women shouldn’t be ashamed to say that instead of trying to pressure other women into that position. Even if that may not be your specific position.
@Nitra813
Жыл бұрын
They get the short end of the stick because other and older married woman keep perpetuating the same idea to their daughters and sons that a good wife is supposed to endure this type of behavior as long as her husband goes to “work” It’s the biggest lie! Nowhere is there a law that says a man doesn’t have to be present and engaged with his wife and children or isn’t supposed to manage his home. Or clean up after himself and look out for his wife’s well being. For this reason my husband and I wrote our own wedding vows. I will not be THAT type of wife. I will challenge/check him if he’s out of order and if something is bothering me or him we would talk about the issue not each other. I will not do it alone. Get right or get left. That’s it. I pray these women keep speaking out and telling the truth.
@butterscotch2086
5 ай бұрын
I think paying a significant portion of the bills is a requirement for being a married single mother. A lot of people are getting being a stay-at-home mother confused with being a married single mother. Being a stay-at-home mother is a hard job, but married single mothers also have to work on top of doing all the household duties. It’s not the same.
@leydle
Жыл бұрын
My mom has told me every once in a while she’d have to pawn off her wedding ring to get some money because when I was sick she didn’t have money to buy my medicine. This coming from a whole married woman, to a working man…
@nisa1388
Жыл бұрын
I know a married single mother who has been married for twenty something years. She has raised their two daughters and solely financially funded college for both. Works full time, does all of the parenting, does all the cooking, cleaning, and takes GOOD care of her husband down to actually shopping for him and dressing him. While even though he works full time, he has never provided financially for the wife or children. He keeps his entire check and spends it on himself. He openly has had affairs and has financially provided for the women he cheats with. When she was thinking about divorce he began threatening her, even harassing her at work. Needless to say she decided to stay with him, why?!?! I don’t know because she still does 100% of everything while hubby is taken care of and does nothing for her or with her 😢
@les1den2
Жыл бұрын
Yup been there lived that! Was married for 5yrs we have two children together and the marriage was trash but when that treatment started trickling down to our children I left! At that point what was the point of staying he wasn’t even being a good husband let alone a good dad so we dipped🤷🏽♀️
@geneinnewade1278
Жыл бұрын
Imagine being a married single stepmother. Happily divorced.
@anastasiab-x2t
Жыл бұрын
😂😢
@bettykelly7565
Жыл бұрын
What's the point in having a partner if he's not one?
@77kc_77
Жыл бұрын
Just stay single and exactly
@AS-kf1ol
Жыл бұрын
I feel like this has more to do with the man you choose. A MAN LIKE THIS DOESNT LOVE YOU. If he was properly taking care of you before the kid i.e. cooking, cleaning, doing things for you, showing his caretaking abilities, then he'd definitely do that for his child. Hed want to, the same he wants to do it for you. Why would you marry someone who doesnt take care of you and expect them to help take care of a baby? The man literally doesnt love you.
@wellknown1204
Жыл бұрын
Why put it on woman on CHOOSING BETTER? WHEN THESE ARE GROWN MAN, so it's a bare minimum to act and be a GROWN individual while single or in a relationship.
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
I don’t think most men are capable of loving women
@arvyarvy4242
Жыл бұрын
I'm a single mom to one child never been married. Planning never to. I'm the sole parent to my daughter. I think my life somehow worked out exactly how it was supposed to and I'm loving it won't change a thing.
@Dnvrluv01
Жыл бұрын
I did everything in my house with the exception of work. When he had the nerve to come to me crying (literal tears) talking about, "I need help. Help me!" I asked him to finish drying the clothes while I went to another state to get my children (they were with my parents. His father came and he demanded their vacation end with my parents to see his father). When I returned with my children the clothes were mildewed. I was pissed. He told me to wash them again. I knew if I started working I would end up doing it all. I started dating and doing me. I have NEVER been in an exclusive relationship with him again. I date whomever I want. He knows that if he has something to say, he can leave! If you are doing all the housework AND the household cannot thrive without your financial contribution. You are a fool to be monogamous. My marriage has never been the same because HE IS LAZY AF!!! ALL the men around him told him that I should be working. I laugh now when we talk about him being the fool and listening to those men. He wishes we could go back. I REFUSE!
@NoName-oe4gm
Жыл бұрын
Damn, They stole Cyn G phrase! 🤦🏾♀️Black women copyright ur phrases.
@msmarcia8972
Жыл бұрын
Yeah Cyn G Should copyright “Your husband is someone else’s boyfriend” using that phase next 😂😂
@msmarcia8972
Жыл бұрын
It just shows women are watching Cyn G. Love all her phases 😂😂😂
@stilljocelyn_
Жыл бұрын
Just think about all those sitcoms.. one that comes to mind “Everybody loves Raymond” , my mom was too sadly.
@whattheysayaboutme425
Жыл бұрын
I never liked that show
@catflon2388
Жыл бұрын
A lot of the husbands don't contribute financially either on top of it...
@dyslstudio8889
Жыл бұрын
This is why lots of single moms balk at how hard some married women flex being married. Being married does have benefits if the man is bringing home significant income, but the hard fact remains that women generally do more and are required to do more in relationships PERIODT. That differential only multiplies with children involved. The difference between married single moms and single moms (I am a single mom) is that there is a double income in marriages. And that definitely helps…when the entirety of the household (from paying all bills cooking cleaning child rearing etc) is on one person, it’s a LOT. Not impossible, but a double income household is definitely a bit less stressful IMO.
@VeeKayGreenerGrass
Жыл бұрын
It's because marriage is viewed as a reward for women... Not!
@CordeliaWagner
Жыл бұрын
I see no use in marriage. Just another outdated worthless custom. It's 2023, not 1953.
@ADR-xn6dg
Жыл бұрын
This is why I ended up finishing school. Now my income is both of our incomes+ when we were together. I started it before my divorce but his lack of help while I was finishing school was a contributing factor to our divorce
@lkf8799
Жыл бұрын
It can be helpful to have another income, but he is also adding to the mess and stress. Plus, he might not just be passive or neglectful either, he might be verbally, financially and emotionally abusive. He might use the kids, family, and friends against her. He might be coercive about sex. He might be petty, vindictive, and controlling. He might be cheating and give her an STD. He might be reckless or an addict or spend all their savings or charge thousands on their credit card. Peace of mind is priceless. Not having to answer to someone else is so much easier.
@UrbanAlchemystic
10 ай бұрын
I agree
@vanessahollenbach85
Жыл бұрын
I'm in a committed relationship (unmarried) and I have 2 sons under 10 with my partner and a 22yr old daughter from my first marriage. I raise my kids on my own, no breaks. I cook, clean (including yard work), homework, nurse the kids when they're sick which happens often since one goes to creche. I also work with my partner, from home. I used to be a successful estate agent but since giving birth Dec'19 (and ofc COVID) I been housebound. My entire career took a back seat and I became a drone of my former self. No sex, no sleep, junk food, depression, inattentive partner, plus I am 99% sure I'm audADHD. I must pick myself up and take my life back but I'm so tired...and gaslig by my partner to believe that everything is ok. I'm tired, I'm scared and I have very low self confidence rn, but I have to take my life back before it's too late.
@mwandikay
Жыл бұрын
You will get it back. Hang in there ❤
@joylastname3035
Жыл бұрын
This can apply to most Nigerian women who are married. They're single af. Majority homes are 2 income homes. If she is not doing an office job, trust that she has a business like a stall in the market where she goes 6 days/week, sells food, makes clothes, farms, etc. Then has to go home and tend to the kids and cook all by herself. I've been to a house where the baby was crying, she's in the kitchen cooking the family meal, trying to fix a quick meal for their other child cos he can't stay hungry till the main meal is ready and he called out to her asking her to make him a cup of tea. I was furious but i bit my tongue. Its not my house or marriage. Let me mind my business.
@layla_and_micahfollowonins2174
Жыл бұрын
As a mom of 2 who was a single mom while we lived together. The entire time. Our lives often become easier when we cut the dead weight. The usually contribute more grief and trouble than they’re worth. Please keep staying single and child free until the bar is raised to heaven!
@SkycometAnimeVamp
7 ай бұрын
A man that doesn’t take any interest in his own children is not a father: he’s a paycheck. He’s child support.
@RedandReason
Жыл бұрын
This is absolutely true and the plight of many married women especially in Nigeria. I have friends who are " Married-Single-Mothers." But, marriage is a BIG deal in Nigeria, so, the women roll with it...sigh. I'm a single mother and feared I may have ended up like these women. As a high- earning professional, who often had to pick everyone's bill. So, enjoyed my singleness and I love it more and more the older I get. When I need a man, I get one, but keep him just as a lover no strings attached. Life is too short. I enjoy your discourses, new subscriber
@D.I.V.A.Journey3758
Жыл бұрын
Yep...been there...done that...divorced now. You can only keep piling on and piling on so much before that person breaks. While I support HEALTHY, BALANCED marriage, I can definitely understand why so many are waiting longer or not getting married at all! A baby changes EVERYTHING and parenting is NOT for the weak! I didn't realize that this is what I was until after we were separated but it's such an accurate description.
@dp1202
Жыл бұрын
I have 2 friends that are in this situation. They keep hounding me about when I’m going to get married and have kids. I think to myself y’all’s situation is not convincing lol nope I’ll pass. I feel bad for them but if they are choosing to stay just to say their married there is nothing I can do about it.
@Camille4Real
Жыл бұрын
Ditch them girl. That's jealousy, and misery loves company. Leave those girls alone. Run!
@swiitdoll
Жыл бұрын
They are jealous of your freedom and want to sabotage you. Misery wants company
@CordeliaWagner
Жыл бұрын
Find new friends. These jealous mothers aren't good for your mental health.
@downbad2874
Жыл бұрын
Yet they say all fathers are needed for what an image 😂 because these fathers clearly didn't add nor take away anything but a few dollars
@gabrielleabraham5773
Жыл бұрын
Facts
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother" A wife has commitment. A single mother never got commitment in the first place lol
@Nithinithinith
Жыл бұрын
Women, wake up. I can’t imagine carrying the child and taking 100% of the labor to give them some man’s name. Men get legacy by just BEING MEN. If you really look at it pregnancy by a man is truly just disrespecting yourself.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother" A wife has commitment. A single mother never got commitment in the first place lol
@thatsrealroughbud...2394
Жыл бұрын
Married Single Mothers are INCREDIBLY common. If you're doing pretty much all the housework, childcare AND working, you're a married single mother who's ALSO looking after a grown man who just lives in your house and has his bills and lifestyle subsidized by you. TradWives don't work outside the home and don't subsidize their husband's wages, don't get it twisted.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother"
@bloomblum
10 ай бұрын
Girl, you narrated my friend's life right now. Especially about the money. Since she started working, he refuses to give her money for anything in the house. "But you have money"
@leogrande204
Жыл бұрын
I feel good to know I'm not alone but it's also pretty sad that I'm not alone in this
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother"
@skystclair242
Жыл бұрын
WELL THAT'S WHY WOMEN SHOULD STOP HAVING TO0 MANY BABIES THINK BEFORE YOU HAVE A BABY!!!
@BoujeeGrapes
Жыл бұрын
This!!! Cause that man can get tired at any point and leave. Leaving you stuck with all 50/11 of them kids.
@TheNumbatwelve
Жыл бұрын
This part. It only took one for me to learn my lesson.
@AIBot929
Жыл бұрын
True, and many women are stopping. Hence the population decline
@_lainverse_
Жыл бұрын
Everyone says this but you think these women thought their partners were gonna be incompetent co parents? the problem is stop teaching men that children and the house is a women responsibility teach men accountability they don’t do anything because they simply don’t want to and know they can get away with it make more consequences to neglectful men
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
@@_lainverse_Bingo
@AminaPhilosophy
Жыл бұрын
That is why so many women are single. They had already observed this imbalance in marriage A LONG TIME AGO and could not bring themselves to settle for the role of indentured servants. 😂 They tried to tell their friends buuuut, they were called bitter.😂😂😂 All the single ladies, please stand up! Marriage is a privilege to men. Ladies don’t be so quick to answer “Yes” to a man’s proposal. Make them afraid to lose you. This way they will contribute to the marriage in an effort to keep you happy. Men take women for granted because women act desperate for marriage. Women have been tricked into basing their worth on their marital status. The truth is that as a woman, you are inherently more valuable than gold. It is the man’ status that elevates once HE becomes a husband. Let’s stop making baby daddies husbands. Let’s start celebrating single womanhood so that our standard for marriage is more than just about having the legal bond and title of wife.
@Nitra813
Жыл бұрын
❤💯
@e113jelly6
Жыл бұрын
Yes u spoke nothing but the absolute truth 💯💯💯
@robinnandersonstudent
Жыл бұрын
Straight facts ❤🎉
@TheCarnivoreSoprano
Жыл бұрын
🎉🎉
@elyse443
Жыл бұрын
I would NEVER EVER put up with that. My husband does a ton with our son and around the house. Luckily he loves me and doesn’t want me to suffer or be exhausted so there’s that, but there’s no way I would take care of someone who isn’t taking care of me or our child! That’s crazy! You live here too! 😂although I will say I do not let him do laundry. I don’t need pink whites😂.
@lilalpaca9847
Жыл бұрын
It’s my reality, after spending most of our lives as a single mom. Getting married didn’t change much. There’s just another possible income… but also someone else that spends money. When your single accountability is easier.
@Heykay34
Жыл бұрын
I would just walk out the house as soon as he get home! Have fun with your kids. DIVORCE BABE DIVORCE (Adele voice)
@andreasmith3638
Жыл бұрын
Thank Cyn G for coining that term
@emarcellecole
7 ай бұрын
I raised my sons with their father in the house, he never paid a bill, bought a birthday/Christmas gift, I have always worked and every rental, and then mortgage was in my name. I tried to have him ejected from the home after he once again became abusive and because he had mail delivered to my address I was told by the police he had as much right as I did whether he paid a bill or not. I even had his sobriety therapist calling me at work to get him back in my home over several days at one point. I was able to get him to leave just over 8 years ago. He would call and manipulate our boys, 10 years apart in age until they each were old enough to actually see the dynamics before they stopped letting him back in while I was at work.
@greensciencegeek
7 ай бұрын
“Kids need masculine energy” Said masculine energy isn’t involved in child rearing 🙄
@Egress00
5 ай бұрын
What masculine energy? HE'S NOT EVEN PRESENT!?
@imjussayn7936
Жыл бұрын
This is EXACTLY why I divorced my then husband in 1997 (left him the year before)
@queenrenagoddessoflovegood7757
Жыл бұрын
If married and you do majority or all the child care and house work then your definitely not only a single married mom but being highly disrespected in your own house by your husband.
@tigerlilly9038
Жыл бұрын
Cheers to the lady @ 11:00. Her daughter is 16!! Love your best life with your education and daughter. Thank God that stumbling block of a husband is gone!! Bless!!
@kylaarmstrong-benjamin8066
Жыл бұрын
This right here! He doesn't travel away from home for months at a time anymore. But does nothing but ad to the mess when home😂
@sg5720
Жыл бұрын
Thank God my husband amazing. Thanks you Lord. I’m so grateful. 🙏🏽😁💕
@aazablue
Жыл бұрын
I WAS. A married single mom. And when we got down to talking about why I was so miserable, he said, I'm not cheating on you or beating on you so what's the problem? 😕
@happilydivorced3235
Жыл бұрын
Yeah! When they are not cheating or beating you, they can refer to themselves as “good” men despite the damage they’re causing. As a psychologist, I have more abusive male clients like that. It’s so sad.
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
Woosah I'd want to go tf off
@Cpre1111
Жыл бұрын
My Mom did it all by herself with me. Shes still married 34 years, same spouse, smh
@happilydivorced3235
Жыл бұрын
😢😢😢
@krystingrant6292
9 ай бұрын
😢
@ladybunnbee
Жыл бұрын
And the worst part about it is your husband still wants to have sex at night after all the chores, kids, cooking and cleaning. No way! I could never! And this is why I will never get married again.
@ivanivez7456
10 ай бұрын
If a husband is financially providing for the children then the wife isn't a "single mother." Taking care of kids isn't just nurturing. It also involves financial support: the roof over their heads, food, clothes etc. You get it now? A wife has commitment, husband and children under the same roof. A single mother never got commitment in the first place and her kids don't have a father in the household. A wife and a single mother aren't the same and never will be
@rayy4pres194
Жыл бұрын
I really appreciate y’all bringing some of the TikTok discord to YT. I refuse download another social media app but I see there is some worthy conversations going on over there. This is my 3rd video of yours I’ve watched! I’m a fan sis!
@trulykey8106
Жыл бұрын
In my experiences, it's just best for women to remain CF and single..My Auntie is currently sick rn, snd she is unable to do things around the house..She calls me to help her clean her bathrooms and kitchen..She is also married with 3 grown sons of her own..Her husband lives with her also..She asked me to come clean her bathrooms yesterday, and she had 2 of her sons there and her husband there..They all used the bathroom and sat on the couches the whole time I was cleaning her house. Now, I don't mind helping a family member out, but I did feel embarrassed for her sons and husbands watching me clean up while they sat there on the couch the entire time..She is just my Aunt..I'm not her child and not her husband..I felt like I was doing something they were supposed to be doing, but Ig she can't get them to do anything..Married woman with 3 kids..She has done everything for them her entire life from cooking to cleaning for them, and when she is sick, she can't get them to do anything..It's sad..While I was there, I was praying that if God ever called me to marriage, that He would bless me with a good man who will help me when I'm unable..It's just not fair..It's not right..😢😢 but for now, I am a single, happy, childfree woman...
@cmmahone
Ай бұрын
My mom was a married single mom to us two girls, in the 1960s and 70 s. My abusive father contributed nothing financially. Mom worked at he made a great salary. And paid her 300 a month room and board. Karma has him in a nursing home right now. We have no contact with him. We adore our mom and all she did for us, sacrifices she made
@cinnamongirl5410
11 ай бұрын
Most women are working outside the home too. AS did I when my children were young. But my spouse acted like an entitled extra child to cook etc for. And deal with his sh-tty attitude and pouting little fits. So I left, just went driving and decided not to go back. My kids and I lived in an RV for the first little bit, til we got settled. But that RV, even through a storm one night, was the most peaceful place in the universe to us. And I could finally BREATHE. It's more difficult to be a married mother, than a single one by far.
@tanyalance2023
Жыл бұрын
I used to call myself a single mother. I didn’t know it was a thing. I just thought my ex was just a selfish person. We’re now separated and his life hasn’t changed except now he is responsible for his own life now.
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