The first and most important job of being a mother is picking the father of your child. Same goes a man picking the mother of his children. Screw that up and the kids will be paying for it forever.
@Aaron-kj8dv
Жыл бұрын
I know a couple women who got knocked up by men who they say are "terrible husbands but amazing fathers" and they agree they wouldn't flip it so they're amazing husbands and terrible fathers for anything.
@instahamx684
Жыл бұрын
Well said.
@aladdout9454
Жыл бұрын
well here i am... yeah I'm screwed. I have accepted the fact that I will have to leave these people behind, that I call my parents, for my own good. My country's culture is too toxic to let someone be their own independent person though, so it's gonna be a wild ride. I have totally prepared myself for being "the villain" of the family, you know, for leaving for my own mental peace
@MichaelJones-rn2pq
Жыл бұрын
@@Aaron-kj8dv So the son is going to learn (by example and experience) how to be a terrible husband? I don't believe in the "Do as I say and not as I do" method of child rearing. It doesn't work.
@Aaron-kj8dv
Жыл бұрын
@@MichaelJones-rn2pq have you ever seen the meme of single moms dressing their infants up like 20 year olds and it says "why do women dress their children up like the men who left them?"
@Aaron-kj8dv
Жыл бұрын
I actually love that John zeroed in on the kid not having a father figure. I know people want to downplay a father's role, but every mature person I know understands how important a strong male figure in a boys life is. A lot of mothers will unintentionally clip their son's wings and then go "why can't he fly?" Usually mother's are there for nuturing and building self esteem, but father's are there for building confidence, self reliability, and leadership.
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
I don't understand how this would be a gendered issue when I see the problem from women my age as well. I am not saying you're wrong, but why is it assumed that women shouldn't have agency over their lives like men should?
@crzyruskie86
Жыл бұрын
They create son husbands.
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
@@crzyruskie86 DANG, YOU'RE RIGHT!!!
@j.j2846
Жыл бұрын
So true!
@madambutrfly23
Жыл бұрын
@@crzyruskie86 they don’t make those babies alone. I hate how no matter what a man does we look at the nearest women to blame.
@cbryce9243
Жыл бұрын
I like the mom's honesty. I feel her frustration, worry and pain.
@zeal4god402
Жыл бұрын
BEAUUUUUTIFUL QUOTE JOHNNY BOY! "Part of excellence is leaving every environment better than when you found it." -John Delony
@aladdout9454
Жыл бұрын
i hope he pins it and then releases a book and uses this quote. Hes very wise, he keeps saying answers to life like its nothing. I wont be surprised if he just forgets most of his one-liners after saying them lol
@JerryStevens
Жыл бұрын
My parents motivated me by kicking me out of the house. It worked.
@cutehumor
Жыл бұрын
she raised her a mama's boy!!!!
@todd2324
Жыл бұрын
Unfortunately, this is how a lot of young boys get involved in the wrong crowd and worse, commit crimes. Too many single mothers underestimate the importance of getting their young men involved in sports, church events, or anywhere there are respectable older men around to be a good influence.
@lauratyler8869
Жыл бұрын
This response is an answered prayer to me. I am a single mother and I often get overwhelmed by my son doing sports and the schedule it requires.I always think it’s too much. So thank you for your thoughts on this! ❤
@KjtheGreatPro
Жыл бұрын
Not figuring out yet what your passion is (18 for crying out loud!!) is not the same as being lazy. Encourage him to figure out what his lifes purpose is. Experiment. Encourage him to try to win again..make him see winning is fun and losing is so not fun.
@deb9806
Жыл бұрын
He's so young I can see rent but don't kick him out. Hanging in awful apartment with bad roommates isn't growing up. Being responsible is.
@rachelgee7894
Жыл бұрын
Yeah but this kid clearly is being lazy. Lots of passionless kids go to college not knowing their major.
@deb9806
Жыл бұрын
@@rachelgee7894 but if he doesnt have a goal it might be waste of money He needs real life contributions though
@rachelgee7894
Жыл бұрын
@@deb9806 I agree. A job and a driver's license to start.
@ChipDouglas-lw9xh
2 ай бұрын
@@rachelgee7894yeah and then come out as a Marxist trans.
@ntmn8444
Жыл бұрын
This is what my husband is worried about. We are going to have a boy soon, and we want to raise a strong boy who grows up to have some level of ambition. I think it’s so sad that so many boys these days don’t want to do anything, and no one is telling them “hey, get up off that chair, no more video games. Let’s go get you a job!”
@jrchac4331
Жыл бұрын
What if he gets a job making video games
@faith6833
Жыл бұрын
But you can encourage instead of push. Let your kid he a kid. Let him have fun. Let him explore and be well rounded. He is a person not a science project or experiment.
@Aaron-kj8dv
Жыл бұрын
Actually the problem is that they're most likely yelling at them after babying them for 18 years. I hope to God I don't turn into one those parents who's on the periphery of my kid's life and then when they're older act confused and go "why aren't you motivated?"
@ellencox8415
Жыл бұрын
You, being married, virtually guarantees this is not his future. Does your husband go to work every day? Yes. Are you AND your husband going to allow him to run the house? No. This is a bi-product of the single mother crisis that 80% of women inflict on themselves. It destroys your children, so just don't do it.
@todd2324
Жыл бұрын
The best thing for any son to become ambitious is to see it modeled through his father. The father is his strongest influence and teacher.
@prudencek7087
Жыл бұрын
I feel for this mother. I've had to learn this the hard way, what dr. John is saying is 100% true. My hubby always says that I mother our kids too much at this stage in their lives (ages 20 and 18). And when hubby tried to be a little harder on them, I would push back and take their side. I had to take a step back and realize that what he is saying is true. I had to step back and allow my husband to give them more responsibility and learn to support him as their dad in that, because it really is for their good in the long run.
@bethanybrowne3803
Жыл бұрын
“How do I motivate him?” You can’t… motivation is intrinsic. You will be starting from scratch in a lot of ways. Time for some tough love mama…good luck!
@calebburghardt3391
Жыл бұрын
I don’t think being a teen and having no ambition is quite the same as being spoiled and lazy (I was both categories at 18). But 100% agree with Dr. John, we all need a helping of struggle to give us purpose and motivation.
@jacosisaba
Жыл бұрын
I’d say he should get a job after he graduates. Get on him to get his grades up but don’t over stress about the job till after. It’s not super weird that he doesn’t know what he wants to do for his life, that’ll come in time.
@ultramarinewaters9325
Жыл бұрын
Hearing John talk about the love and effort he puts into his son and the Season of Excellence he has planned, made me cry. I wish I had a father like that. I had a father who was absent in his presence. It hurts so much to see loving fathers. I wish my brother and I had that.
@writeherstory11
Жыл бұрын
Mothers love to coddle sons
@karenKristal
Жыл бұрын
When i was younger i had no motivation and never knew what i wanted to do. Its only now im older i realise that when i was a kid i was smothered and my sense of self was constantly negated. When the damaged has already been done you can only step back, give space and be gently supportive and validating, and let a person work it out for themselves over time.
@kc-il4sb
Жыл бұрын
I know people that thrived joining the military- I know it's not for everyone, but it's a wake-up call, building self-esteem and can use GI bill for school later- just an idea if mom has trouble getting him to thrive.
@firefly9838
Жыл бұрын
Yeah.... be a pawn for rich people to fight their wars
@Aaron-kj8dv
Жыл бұрын
It's not worth signing a 4 year contract to find out though lol
@lot2196
Жыл бұрын
Typical teenager. I'm 57 and still don't know what I wast to do in life. In the meantime I work in engineering and IT.
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
I am the same way but I am 25. I don't have a motivation to do anything, I just do what is needed to keep a roof over my head and food on the table 🤭
@firefly9838
Жыл бұрын
@@shelbysycamore637 This
@abcdefg4570
Жыл бұрын
I guess I'm the opposite. I'll be 18 in half a year, and I have a clear vision of becoming an aerospace engineer and moving to the US. However, it's the family part I'm uncertain about. Do I want to have kids? - I don't know! Adulthood is approaching too quickly.
@redzin8818
Жыл бұрын
Get him involved in martial arts! It teaches discipline, is fun, and is constructive. Jiu jitsu would be a good place to start
@tashasmith1234
Жыл бұрын
Oh John!! I love this-- Season of Excellence!!!-- Can you share more about that? I started having my daughters cook for the family this summer. They had to get recipes, plan, and make BLD. I love this concept- SOE!
@mle011
Жыл бұрын
She’s asking this question 10 days before he turns 18?? I’m with John, she’s asking this question 12 years too late.
@jill9606
Жыл бұрын
We have to dream with our children about their future from childhood on in order to help them to grow that intrinsic ambition. What do I want to be and do? Who will I become? How will I be the best version of me and contribute to the world? If we never teach them to reach for the stars, how can we expect them to do it when they reach adulthood?
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
You don't have to teach them to reach for the stars, but they should know that their actions effect others and they cannot expect to be dependent on you forever. They should understand that everyone's time is valuable and finite. I don't understand why many people my age's parents failed to teach them these lessons.
@jill9606
Жыл бұрын
@@shelbysycamore637 I disagree about the “reach for the stars” thing. Why not teach them to strive for everything they want to accomplish? That’s what I meant.
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
@@jill9606 they are your kids so your word means law, but I find too many people my age shot for the stars but never took into account what is needed to get what you want. They never were willing to sacrifice and delay gratification to achieve what they wanted because they never saw what their parent's had to sacrifice to raise them as a sacrifice, it was more of an expectation. Why fight for what you want when your life is comfortable at the cost of others? Why value a paycheck you earn when your parents happily subsidize your lifestyle (much like this mother has done for 18 years and failed to teach her son to do basic things for himself?)
@Erica-wz8yv
Жыл бұрын
Great advice. Everything has been handed to him, no wonder he doesn’t want to work for it.
@newname5651
Жыл бұрын
He probably has no ambition because he realizes the truth. Why be ambitious when all you do is work and come home ever day when you become an adult.
@iambilly1134
4 ай бұрын
Agree
@ChipDouglas-lw9xh
2 ай бұрын
Exactly.
@Kinglore2000
Жыл бұрын
I remember being 18 like it was yesterday. You couldn't do anything right at that age. In my case, the only right thing I could do was getting a laborious, if not dangerous, machine and tool related job.
@firefly9838
Жыл бұрын
Doesn't seem safe
@abcdefg4570
Жыл бұрын
I'll be 18 in half a year. I still attend high school, and am planning to go to university and become an aerospace engineer.
@justabunneh6490
Жыл бұрын
I have a feeling this kid is not going to care if he doesn't have sheets on his bed or if his clothes stink... lol
@SparkHomeschool
Жыл бұрын
He’ll start caring how his clothes smell when he meets someone he wants to impress 😉
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
@@SparkHomeschool I love your optimism. I'm assuming you've never heard of a NEET and/or an incel before, correct?
@SparkHomeschool
Жыл бұрын
@@shelbysycamore637 I had to look up neet. I do, unfortunately, know about incels. Still, statistically this kid is more likely to figure it out than to become either of two you mentioned
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
@@SparkHomeschool you're right he's 18 and his mother just realized she set him up to not have self agency. It's more a matter of how long will his mother fund him though this.
@cita_m
2 ай бұрын
I'm glad I'm listening to this when my own boys are 5 and 2.
@dianeovercash6739
Жыл бұрын
What a great intelligent dad.
@TheAgentmigs
Жыл бұрын
Don't blame him for not wanting to go into crippling debt for college tho.
@someone-ji2zb
4 ай бұрын
College is never a necessity. If he really wanted to, he can go work 2 jobs as an unskilled worker for the rest of his life, but it wont be a life with much time for entertainment or relationships. Parents do their kids a disservice by not instilling work ethic early on (8-12 years old). I will never blame these young adults (within reason) for not being driven, when it was never taught to them.
@instahamx684
Жыл бұрын
This makes me sad, I know so many people who were like this when they were teenagers who still have this unambitious ‘defeated’ vibe. We learn to have a lust for life from our parents’ passion for life and single parents who are running around just trying to hold everything together, micro managing everything for fear of the train going off the rails, these parents have no idea how unpleasant it is to live with them as a child. It’s all stress all the time. They demonstrate that adult hood is misery and struggle and to be lived for others, and those others are not that happy either. They teach children through their constant exhaustion from doing it all alone, that children are a burden so they grow up with no ambition to have families of their own. They fear ambition because they fear asking for anything they need or want because they don,t want anyone else to ruin their life sacrificing for them. They have been trained by overwhelmed single parents that their needs are disruptive to their environment and could threaten their survival. The stress single parents keep the whole family under teaches kids that adults are people who do not love their life and they merely exist to survive and when you are raised to think life is just about struggling to survive you get really emotionally burned out by the time you reach 18. If you can’t maintain a loving harmonious relationship with the person you choose to breed with you are definitely going to damage the children you raise without them. The fact that so many people are so arrogant that they think being a single parent is an option and flaunt it as empowerment is exactly why they don’t work hard enough to insure they select a suitable mate, who they will make every effort to stay married to, so they will be there to raise the children with them, happily and healthily. Also the kid thinks his mother hates him. That’s why he asks her, do you hate me? It’s not a move, Dr. John. It,s very serious that he feels this way. This woman has made this boy think she hates being a mother by radiating stress about raising him his whole life and letting him know she doesn’t even think he is a competent human being by doing everything for him. She does not even know what he dreams about because he does not appear to dream about anything. It’s unwise for you to recommend she brush past that comment as some kind of manipulation.
@VonSolo5
Жыл бұрын
I am replying to my own comment because the comment above is from my other account. I watched this again because I need to say one more thing. Dr. John, you went way out of your way to absolve this woman of all accountability for her choices to protect her feelings. You blamed the father who disappeared, for everything that this kid is going through, even though she raised him and we don’t know if she was the one who told the father to go, you glossed over that she says she bought an abusive man into the kid’s life and also dated throughout the child’s life, and none of these men were fit for real relationships. And you also blamed the kid and portrayed him as the problem that should be handed a high pressure ultimatum by a woman he has no respect for because he knows she has no idea what the hell she is doing. He doesn’t trust her or her guidance because she makes really bad choices and doesn’t have her own priorities in order. She has made many mistakes and she has made this kid feel very unsafe about adulthood because she is a mess that doesn’t accept responsibility and you helped her avoid it again with your advice to her, to blame everyone else for her choices and putting a ticking time bomb packed with eviction on a terrified teenager. How is he going to learn to love accountability or responsibility from her?
@ayakaaaaaa
Жыл бұрын
Can John write a book about raising a child? SO many parents are LOST..
@christinebutler7630
Жыл бұрын
How do you motivate him? You tell him 18 is an adult and after high school he has 90 days to get a full time job and start paying rent, or enlist, or get into school pursuing a definite vocational.goal. At the end of that time he either does one of those things or he moves out.
@ChipDouglas-lw9xh
2 ай бұрын
Horrible.
@delilah6390
Жыл бұрын
The door. That’s how you motivate him
@someone-ji2zb
4 ай бұрын
Normally yea, but not exactly the economic climate to assume most can survive, given that most people in the US currently can't survive on a single income (average man under 40 currently making 39.5k a year).
@elkejansevanrensburg4692
3 ай бұрын
Please! I also need to hear more about the season of excellence. My son is almost 15. Dad is out of the picture and my son is struggling to cope. I have to be mom and dad. But I want to give him skills to thrive!
@jghk5866
Жыл бұрын
Wish you strength and courage to help your son Meghan.
@successtipswithsteph
24 күн бұрын
Rites of Passage and the Beauty Way....nice ❤
@kellharris2491
Жыл бұрын
I don't see the issue. He needs a job. He doesn't have to know what he wants. Tell him to get his AS or a trade. Once he has those he can work and figure out the next step.
@Ryan_DeWitt
Жыл бұрын
You can't make someone or help someone have ambition, discipline, or motivation. It has to come from them and them alone.
@sunshine3914
Жыл бұрын
You can definitely influence them.
@Ryan_DeWitt
Жыл бұрын
@@sunshine3914 Yea, maybe when they're tiny children and have it in them. Any influence from outside sources now that aren't coming from within will at best cause short term motivation which will quickly wear off.
@janwells2199
Жыл бұрын
MILITARY.
@Dwights_trash_can
Жыл бұрын
No. I am a veteran and I have seen many kids joinging not knowing what they are getting into. They fail miserably, drink, get into trouble, and do drugs. The military is not a baby sitting program for young adults who don't know what they want
@Eric_Bassett
Жыл бұрын
She can’t force him to join the service and tbh he doesn’t sound like the military type.. he doesn’t even have the want to get his license and have that basic freedom, I doubt he’d want to go into Military service lol.
@riseredeos
Жыл бұрын
😂 die in the oil proxy wars or get a civilian job that can’t begin to pay for college. Get through college with debt or the GI bill and make 60K and need three roommates. We wonder why no one is “excited “ to launch when 58% of 18-24 yr olds cannot afford to live on their own ( and don’t according to the census)
@donaldlyons17
Жыл бұрын
@@Eric_Bassett There is also the likelihood that he will make less because the likely won't be an educated officer!!!!!
@rogermarr9067
Жыл бұрын
Have that tough conversation with him and take him down to your local recruiter office and let him know what his choices are or at least that's what I'm doing with my daughter and it's worked wonders but of course I might have just got lucky Good luck to you
@rogermarr9067
Жыл бұрын
@Bok Choy well first thank you for your service.. And second I didn't say I'm forcing her to join but you have to get tough on kids and make them start making decisions Plus do you think I'm really going to encourage my daughter to put herself into a dangerous situation or am I going to help her make the best of her decision come on sorry it sounds like you had a bad experience
@andrewheffel3565
Жыл бұрын
Dr. John mostly gave her a free pass saying it was the absent fathers fault. But all his suggestions are right on. Her sons life is going to be really tough unless she can follow John's advice and give him a crash course in self reliance. I come from a badly dysfunctional family and I moved out at 19. I didn't have a clue about life, but I finally got on a good path. I married in my late 30's and we had 2 boys. We had a blast with them. We put them in sports, school clubs, student government, art classes, anything they wanted. We pushed them HARD academically. One made it to varsity basketball and the other was senior class president. Both had jobs in high school and college. They graduated college with honors, and lined up professional jobs before graduation. They are thriving at work and in their personal lives, and we do not fear for their future. BUT NONE OF THIS HAPPENED BY ACCIDENT.
@Zerodebtliving
Жыл бұрын
I’m sure they are thriving 🙄. It so annoying when parents try to act as if the free perfect kids or better than other parents . I’m sure the kids would disagree. Also you rly don’t know their lives if they are out the house. You don’t know their thoughts, feelings etc. just hope u did a good job and encourage others……otherwise you just made people that are more likely than not just like the rest of us.
@andrewheffel3565
Жыл бұрын
@@Zerodebtliving My point is that to raise kids who have a good chance of doing well in life takes a lot of focused effort on the part of their parents. My parents had no clue of how to have a good life themselves, much less how to teach me how to have one. I had to figgure even the basics out for myself. My wife and I managed to prepare our kids for life fairly well, which should be every parents goal.
@lwscijunkie
Жыл бұрын
And no discussion about the FACT that this kid is scared to death. Only some baby steps will ease his fears and build his confidence. The "comfort zone" is absolutely holding him back, but so is FEAR.
@lindawer
Жыл бұрын
Hmm what if you start by telling him to begin by just putting a stake in the ground. Start something. Then move step by step from there. Very few people have a clear and definite path to success. We figure what we’re good at, what we enjoy, what we need to survive and work steps from those points and hopeful Ly y end up in a job that we like more than dislike, a job that pays enough to meet our basic 4 walls and hopefully if we’re lucky find someone with similar values and dreams to share it with.
@heidicoffman3762
Жыл бұрын
What about connecting with him and taking him shopping and inviting him into budgeting sessions and dinners? Maybe add problems but also connect connect connect.
@mikehonchoboi
Жыл бұрын
Mom choose a bad dad. Women are equal partners in making a bad childhood for their children. How many good dudes were told to kick rocks? It’s called mate selection.
@sunshine3914
Жыл бұрын
Lots of them marry the first one to come along… same as men.
@bethanyrivera6432
Жыл бұрын
Please WRITE ✍️ A BOOK on parenting so I can teach my child more things like “season of excellence” because that is absolutely awesome and something I want to incorporate into my parenting!!!!!!! 🎉
@tashasmith1234
Жыл бұрын
We are raising leaders of the next generation!
@bettysmith4527
Жыл бұрын
To much coddling led to this....
@TheEquiss
Жыл бұрын
When my kids were 11-12 they started mowing yards for neighbors for $. They would do pretty much anything for $$-rake leaves, trim brush, as they got older-paint build, cut storm fallen trees. I never paid an allowance because it’s not reality. They worked for our friends and neighbors. Money they earned was not to be wasted. I put it in their head that the money they were earning was going to buy their first car. Minimum 50% had to go in a bank savings account and could not be withdrawn except to buy that car. The other half they could do what they wanted with. That became such of a habit that when they got out on their own they put $ in their own savings as part of paying their bills. They knew at 18 they had to pay their share of the bills. Life is not free. You cannot live off of anyone for free. They now make more $$ than me and are successful. Neither went to college. They have no best but make $$
@jameswilliamson6262
Жыл бұрын
Two words Parris Island
@sprocastersprocaster
5 ай бұрын
I'd hate to have you in my life oldtimer.
@crzyruskie86
Жыл бұрын
John, that quip about punishing him for not going to college is stupid. I could see if you said, "Either you go to college, trade school, military or some other type of higher learning. If not then Xyz". Saying college is the only way is stupid. Also single moms ruin more ment then pretty much everything else. Dads, get custody of your kids. Dont let them flounder through life with the mother, she will ruin your child.
@stephtrader4662
Жыл бұрын
Lots of great ideas in the comments. Hope mom is reading through (and ignoring the useless stuff)
@LisaLisaCJ
Жыл бұрын
I have two adult sons . One ambitious and hard working one ehhhh and always has been. My ex husband was there but worked all the time to not have responsibility. He told me this 20 years in. He left right when our last turned 18. I asked my son what I did wrong. He said nothing , my dad did. Sigh
@Piccolo_Re
Жыл бұрын
Find a good church and have him go to Bible Study with other men. Have him go on mission trips and help the poor. That would wake up the fire in his belly.,That would be the best thing for him. Too many people ignore Christianity today and a Biblical worldview would solve most of these problems.
@jjgems5909
Жыл бұрын
Eh i wouldn’t do missions to have a “wake up call”. To many short term missions go for that reason and can’t give these poor people a truly sustainable life. And I truly believe you have to have a calling by God to become a missionary. It isn’t simply to “help the poor” it’s to spread the message of the gospel. If he isn’t already attending church regularly and drawing near to God I definitely wouldn’t just send him on a missions trip with no foundation on Christ. So many people go for selfish reasons to “find themselves” instead of in the whole hearted service of others and to spread the gospel. But I do think he should go to church, and hopefully come to the saving knowledge of our Lord and Savior. Only he can give the ultimate “wake up call”
@Evil-Rod-Farva
Жыл бұрын
Look around see what 18 year old men have to choose from and you’ll see why he’s apathetic. You also completely failed him by removing his father from his life. Every boy deserves a decent father and leaving one or procreating with one who isn’t worthy is 100% your responsibility as a mother. Honestly the best thing you can do for him is introduce to him books by Aaron Clarey.
@LisaLisaCJ
Жыл бұрын
You don’t know what type of father Alan is going to be. It’s the fathers fault for not being there. Same with a bad mother. Some people decide after the kid is here that they don’t want to be a parent.
@Evil-Rod-Farva
Жыл бұрын
@@LisaLisaCJ If you properly vet a partner that you’re having relations with, it would become readily apparent if they’re the kind of person worth having a child with. His mother either had poor judgment, or exercised no judgment. His mom and dad failed him. She gave him an absent father and his father was absent. Now he has no idea how to be a responsible and productive man. How would he?
@terryanderson4366
Жыл бұрын
She should have consulted and asked for suggestions many years too late. Uncle's and grandfather's are usually available for quidence. Helicopter mom's that coddle damage. Kid have to make mistakes to learn. They learn by watching, listening and or tickling on electric fence. Scoffing at strong men while parenting dismissed them and they walk away from children.
@Shadowwind4
Жыл бұрын
He is literally me 6 years ago. Growing up without a father is tough. My mother is amazing but a mom can’t be a dad.
@adrianjeffrey2897
Жыл бұрын
He better get some act right. It's people like me waiting for fresh meat, no money and no ambition equals vulnerability...and vulnerable people get bent over, no vaseline.
@zeal4god402
Жыл бұрын
Jesus taught me how to be an exceptional man!
@michaelpalumbo4880
Жыл бұрын
I feel so sorry for Delony's son - he's literally training him on how to be a simp.
@chrystalwilliams5345
Жыл бұрын
My 19 year old wants to be a video game streamer. Ugh!!
@shelbysycamore637
Жыл бұрын
There is nothing wrong with that. Apply the magic, "do you have McDonald's money" logic to him. He wants to be a streamer, but with what rent, utility, hardware money?
@hoademo965
Жыл бұрын
good advice!
@SaylerT
Жыл бұрын
Good for her.
@enriquegomez9151
Жыл бұрын
How do I accomplish this for my 4 and 5 year old now so that they don’t have this struggle in the future? Anyone have good resources?
@sunshine3914
Жыл бұрын
Dang, Dr. John has set his own kid behind like 8 years.
@scorchedearthcreations
Жыл бұрын
Before watching video: ‘Is he lazy?’ Me: ‘yes’
@Kymarov9
Жыл бұрын
You have yourself a permanent resident… you will be taking care of and washing his clothes and reminding him to bathe for the rest of your life.
@christinao8877
Жыл бұрын
Have him volunteer or do an internship.
@bettysmith4527
Жыл бұрын
No, have him get a damn job and earn some money!
@iPervy
Жыл бұрын
Have to raise him to be a warrior, a fighter. This is in mentality. Teach him to be tough and strive to be a hero, and like a real life super saiyan lol. Let them play with sticks of swords, roll to see who is strongest, strategise in teams to see who will raise to leadership. Even games often has the heros journey. When watching a horror tell them to be brave, in a horror game tell them they arent being hunted and running away but searching for a way to defeat them - especialylly when they pick up a weapon melee or ranged, or key to turn the tide you tell them - now we're the hunters/hero monsters. The dumb idea of being a hero and a warrior goes a long way in all stages of life lol.
@someone-ji2zb
4 ай бұрын
Sadly, can't do that to an 18 year old. Parents realize far too late that this is an issue only solvable when their kids are actually still kids.
@zmanzeta7776
Жыл бұрын
Am i the only one who thinks John goes a bit overboard with his praises of some callers? I understand wanting to be empathetic, but saying “High five to you! I would give you a hug if i was in the room with you” seems a bit much. It also seems forced. She literally called and admitted to messing up some in How she is raising her son. The next sentence Out of your mouth should not be “high five you did such a good job!”
@David-wo9un
Жыл бұрын
Imagine if you visited a therapist and while seated in the same room the therapist mentioned hugging you.
@zmanzeta7776
Жыл бұрын
@@David-wo9un it would be awkward. Also, if my therapist constantly was telling me how brave i was i would probably leave. I’ve seen John do that many times, it’s annoying. If I’m calling you because I have a problem, I don’t want to be called stunning and brave
@JustActNormal
Жыл бұрын
Un motivation is directly a result of parenting Either poor parenting or abusive parenting
@zitroanor
Жыл бұрын
Clearly you've never faced this, probably due to your superior parenting skills. Good job! 👏👏👏
@jjgems5909
Жыл бұрын
No not true. My cousin is sort of the same way. His other sisters are totally self motivated, going to nursing school but he’s just unmotivated and lazy in many ways. He was always smart and got great grades but recently in his senior year his motivation has declined. My aunt and uncle are worried for him. They’re great parents. In sure they weren’t perfect but who is. They’ve provided every opportunity for all their children. My uncle is a cop, my aunt a stay at home mom. So it’s not always abuse or poor parenting. An 17-18 year old is an adult and eventually adults make their own decisions. If anything it sounds like she babies him to much.
@ChipDouglas-lw9xh
2 ай бұрын
@@jjgems5909sounds like they raised the girls the same as the boy. The boy got emasculated the girls got celebrated.
@KindaSweetPotato
Жыл бұрын
this is just too much for a not even 18 year old. NO DUH he doesn't know what he wants. he needs a male figure years ago and someone to guide him through manhood (church or friend or grandpa). stop forcing 18 year Olds to have a plan. they don't know. why are you shocked. don't do everything for him. but God let him figure it out a bit. have him find a.job. help him he doesn't know what you're supposed to do. ask him things he would like to do. has he applied for college?
@RanalL72
Жыл бұрын
It's easy to blame the dad, but did the mother even want the father to be a part of his life or did she cancel him? It sounds like she didn't even recognize the value of a male figure until her child was an adult. Sounds like 'I don't need no man" does not work.
@aarondavid5866
4 ай бұрын
unrealistic these days John. couldnt even happen
@RandomHero2131
Жыл бұрын
Sorry but it doesn't 100 percent fall on the father.... 90%. The other 10% is on her because she chooses poorly when finding a man
@oogie-boogie
Жыл бұрын
in my house growing up,, you knew at 18 your out of the house,, it was not harsh,, u just knew
@donaldlyons17
Жыл бұрын
He can't survive without support!!!!! I don't want him being in bad stuff trying to survive!
@marcosacosta1319
Жыл бұрын
Have him learn about finance and investing and learn online businesses and big business make him get a job to start out he can get some regular job Hiring and have him do side hutles like lawn mowing ebay amazon something and learn about credit and credit cards too he'll be straight all info is on KZitem
@ericmoore9444
Жыл бұрын
Maybe it’s feminism attacking his soul
@zmanphotos1578
Жыл бұрын
This scares me, the fact we aren’t hearing the dads side, and what his picture looked like. John takes a feminism approach and only looking at the one side.
@madambutrfly23
Жыл бұрын
The dad isn’t around. That’s not her fault. Men needs to take responsibility for and stop blaming women.
@zmanphotos1578
Жыл бұрын
@@madambutrfly23 2 sides to each side, I want to know why. I’m so incredibly tired of men taking the blame for everything. Maybe this mom is so terrible he left and the courts rewarded her the kid for whatever reason. 2 sides to each story……men aren’t always the one to blame, maybe the mom screwed up just as bad
@georgewagner7787
Жыл бұрын
He's gone. It depends matter why. She needs to be tougher
@mba2ceo
Жыл бұрын
Wrong. JOHN is SIMPING to his audience so he will punish the kid. She 100% failed as a parent. My opinion
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