I think I procrasti-plan and -learn because I have enough things for 10 lifetimes that I wanna do and try, and I can't figure out how to prioritize them/what I want the most, and so I get stuck in action paralysis and procrastination out of fear of choosing the wrong things, and end up doing little to none of the things. And being aware of this has not yet been enough to solve the problem 🤔
@darklittlepeople
Ай бұрын
Oh my god, word for word, same! 😢
@francesprendergast1721
Ай бұрын
This is helpful but I disagree with the idea that 'if the juice was worth the squeeze' you'd be doing it (finding time, resources etc). Fear can be so powerful that it can totally extinguish your interest - this is, in part, what depression is for some people.
@jamienotamy
Ай бұрын
I totally know what you mean. I think if you're uncertain of whether anxiety is clouding your judgement, you definitely shouldn't take this advice. But I see it like setting realistic, confidence building goals for yourself. I used to really want to be a professional piano player. I tried to hone my skills for years. But eventually I came to realize that no matter my love and devotion to piano, I simply didn't have the skill level needed compared to other piano players. But I did have the skill in art. I was an ordinary musician, but I am a phenomenal artist. And if I had continued to throw myself at piano, it would have eaten all the time I could be spending becoming a great artist. The juice was not worth the squeeze. I gave up piano, and I was sad, but I get infinitely more fulfillment creating art I know is noteworthy than I ever did grinding away at piano feeling like a failure. And now I love listening to piano music and I no longer feel resentment towards talented piano players :)
@EmmaCogan
21 күн бұрын
I agree! I think this video is super helpful but that is the one part that I think is up for debate or maybe up to the individual. Plus, I think there’s the layer of neurotypical people and the “if you REALLY had the drive you’d just be doing it” sentiment where NT people don’t understand us, that I think for me at least is partly why I tend to stray from verbiage like that. But I totally get and love the general message of this video!
@Jaychra
19 күн бұрын
I think it can work in tandem with cptsd and anxiety/depression if you also interpret it as, if you're not ready for it, you won't do it... If you haven't worked through some deep barriers then maybe they need to come first as the juice that's worth the squeeze I was really mad about my mental health dictating what I was able to work on first when I really wanted to do all these projects, but after giving that some effort it's helped in a much more fundamental way, and now I can attempt projects in a way that respects my needs better. But I was mad about feeling forced to address the trauma before my own goals, for years.
@LorindaSmith-vy9xh
6 күн бұрын
Fear is my issue too, I have a fear of success, sounds strange but I was able to move through the world not scared at all from birth to about 35 yr then something happened. I saw my loved ones getting older and I felt I need to be near them so my fear started to creep in and now I am absolutely afraid of succeeding in life and the fear is that I would have to leave those I love in order to have that success so I choose a mundane life and job to avoid my fear. I am 50 now and I move from job to job and I turn down every promotion I am offered due to my fear of being taken away from my loved ones.
@skeptik-ci5xo
19 күн бұрын
"Do you want to do the thing, or do you want to have DONE the thing?" You nailed it. It requires a lot of courage, self-reflection and honesty to make this important distinction. This is a lot of my life i a nutshell : /
@rachael943
Ай бұрын
OMG STOP CALLING ME OUT. (No, don't. Somebody needs to)
@CarenMagill
Ай бұрын
I hear ya!!!
@Miss_Annlaug
Ай бұрын
Also; its kind of like daydreaming. Daydreaming about an outcome or a situation. Its like escaping the now and dreaming about the future. And thats ok. But we get i to trouble when we stay there❤
@ameleh61
Ай бұрын
I DID IT! I just bought a new camera and spent all day yesterday learning about it. And after work today I cannot wait to get back to it. How long did I research? 9 months. How old is my previous camera? 10 years. My friend, a pro photographer, told me to just make a decision. But I could not until I had ALL my questions answered. So I was doing good work, but it did not need to take 9 months.
@cynthialoch8947
Ай бұрын
Which one did you decide on and how are you liking it? Signed, another procrasti-planner photog lover 😅
@ameleh61
Ай бұрын
@@cynthialoch8947 The Sony A7RV. I've spent the last week and half alternating between watching videos on autofocus settings, going outside, coming back in to look at the photos. I'm very happy with it, and just bought a macro lens too.
@cynthialoch8947
Ай бұрын
@@ameleh61 AWESOME! Thank you for replying!! Great job on making that decision because it is NOT an easy one!! 👍🏻🥳
@bakerzermatt
Ай бұрын
There's an old Russian novel called Oblomov, who is the ultimate procrasti-planer. I think this is one of the best representations of ADHD I've ever seen, especially for a 19th century book.
@YazWhyNY
Ай бұрын
Is it bad that I want to plan how to stop procrasti-planning 😵💫 I've once again been attacked. I'll need to save your podcast episode so i can listen to this again!!
@thesmugroup
Ай бұрын
Oof. 🤦🏼♀️ Me being called out again. As if the procrasti-learning video wasn’t bad enough, now I get to work on my procrasti-planning. I bet that means I don’t need all the different planners I keep getting, either. 👀
@YazWhyNY
Ай бұрын
SAME. I've moved on from physical planners to Notion ones tho (none that I've kept up with 🙃).
@nikkireigns
Ай бұрын
I have sooooo many notebooks and apps with one page started 😅
@Anikanoteven
Ай бұрын
I simply lack the money to accomplish so many goals. I would have no problem calling professionals and making purchases if money was no object. However the thought of having to figure out where to get money for my plans or how I can accomplish my goals on a strict budget tires me out and I just put it off.
@JennM13
Ай бұрын
I have a black belt in procrastaplanning! … and the learning thing……. 😬
@katec9893
Ай бұрын
Wow you've summarised the place I've been in for years, I've never heard this talked about before. For me there are two main barriers, one is I had a traumatic experience training for a previous career which made fear being incapable so the thought of other careers is terrifying. The other issue is I start working on my goal, plan it and take the first steps, start to see progress but then a trauma/shock/loss or big change happens and I go into a depression and have to take 1-2 years to recover. Then when I return to my goal I've forgotten a lot of things. My dream is to be self employed and I've felt like I've been spinning my wheels due to the above for years and years. And you're so right about how it affects our self esteem and confidence.
@irinaelliott5585
Ай бұрын
Hello, thank you so much for your comment. You verbalized exactly what is happening in my life. I am experiencing the exactly what you are saying. I invest time, money, efforts and energy in my projects, and I have a major loss or traumatic experience and can't manage the project due to depression. Thank you so much for sharing. I'm researching how to manage the situation like we discussed.
@katec9893
Ай бұрын
@@irinaelliott5585 I'm glad my comment resonated but sorry you're also experiencing this. I'm currently experiencing it again due to a bereavement, I don't know how people function and hold down jobs whilst painful life events happen to us.
@polyglotmona
Ай бұрын
Oh no, I’ve been doing this and didn’t even realise it. I’m glad that the KZitem algorithm recognised my problem and showed me the solutions. Thanks for all the tips.
@bren6773
Ай бұрын
Makes so much sense. I’ll think about it later when I have more time 🥴 also did anyone else notice the eyes in the skull on the wall glowing? 😮
@ritaharris2372
Ай бұрын
I did not notice until you mentioned it. Creepy.
@user-vx4ud5gx5t
Ай бұрын
I never noticed before. 🧐 Why does a person place a goat skull with glowing eyes on a black wall?! Gives off demonic vibes. 😱 I don't like that at all. Makes me reconsider listening to any of Caren's advice. 🤔 😟
@MaryMeisterhaft
Ай бұрын
What if.. you are at a point where you do not know any longer what you really want? When you wake up every morning and you just hope that you are still the person you were yesterday - with the same goals, dreams and plans? I don't have that. I wake up and I'm like "Gosh, again? Who am I today?" ..
@whatwilliwatch3405
Ай бұрын
It's possible you are a multipotentialite. I recommend watching the TED Talk "Why Some of Us Don't Have One True Calling" and/or read the book "How to Be Everything," both by Emilie Wapnick. According to the video/book, you don't necessarily have to be the same person with the same goals, dreams, and plans every day to be successful or fulfilled. It's a very interesting perspective, and one that I've been mulling over ever since I learned about it.
@gypsypath1
Ай бұрын
This is me and second the other commenter’s video and book recommendations! Though, honestly, her book is still in my “saved for later” cart. 😅
@Heyu7her3
Ай бұрын
It's part "novelty-seeking behavior" & only works well when your livelihood supports it. Otherwise, lots of money & time down the drain 😪
@whatwilliwatch3405
Ай бұрын
@@gypsypath1 (Don't forget about libraries. If you can't quite bring yourself to buy the book, check it out from your local library first. Then you can decide if it's worth buying. That's what I do. I don't have nearly enough space/money to buy every book that interests me 😅)
@10_Roads
Ай бұрын
@@whatwilliwatch3405 Thank you
@db11697
Ай бұрын
what's the difference between the juice-squeeze exercise vs. procrastination self talk of talking yourself out of it? I have a dream project where I've had the juice-squeeze exercise (before seeing this video) and decided against it but the dream keeps coming back. Lots of ideas, even more as time goes by, but no action. Well a little action here and there which I didn't enjoy that much. What's the secret to free flowing action while doing like the planning part?
@thersten
Ай бұрын
Adderall maybe 🤔
@akrovil06
4 күн бұрын
TBH: This marathon analogy has literally gone through me -in the way that i’ve been enlightened deeply. Couldn’t be more true.. But i really don’t know where/how to start changing things after all this level of consciousness😢
@jenniferverwiel2244
Ай бұрын
This! Just crossed off most of the to-do items from my calendar for today...I just won't do them.
@ritaharris2372
Ай бұрын
I now do a monthly list to give me more time to do them, but some get moved to the next month.
@Turtlpwr
Ай бұрын
Oooph too real
@Miss_Annlaug
Ай бұрын
Organisation has helped me a lot. Before i had way to much stuff and it was in my way, taking my time. No i have less. It's much easier to do creative and fun things❤
@EmilyVidd
Ай бұрын
Your message is direct, heart felt, and easily applicable to real life. Thank you!
@nicolemerritt8419
Ай бұрын
Is this what I've been doing!!? This IS what I've been doing. Thank you! I'm very stuck ❤
@TheFeralFarmgirl
Ай бұрын
Yikes. I have done this even as a child. I wanted to start a club. I made buttons, goodie bags, flyers, whatever else and never actually started the club. I was so burned out before I actually started to do the thing because the work I did before I started was too much to keep up, I never actually did it. I probably didn't even need to do those things. Oh well. LOL
@nikkireigns
Ай бұрын
Same! Also I love your username (I’m a farm girl also)
@Heyu7her3
Ай бұрын
Sounds like that's "hyperfocusing on the wrong thing" which could either be fixed by shifting one's focus or delving into why you're avoiding the actual thing
@trudymoffat1572
Ай бұрын
Wow! That is my life!😮 (with the exception of wanting to run a marathon 😂)
@GARG69
Ай бұрын
OMB this has shook me to my core. I have been called out. And its so simple.
@trishweber9695
Ай бұрын
sooo great. I do this all the time about multiple things. Yes I need to make time and move forward with the thing I really want. Thanks for clarifying and making me feel less guilty and just less skilled in solving this problem. You Rock!
@hivyfalou1393
Ай бұрын
I always feel I'm about to try when I watch youtubers I love, you don't know how much your videos can help us and the comfort it makes me feel ♥♥♥
@caramenz
Ай бұрын
Ooohf… finally I understand why my confidence has been oddly off. Thank you! ❤
@mystikosportal
Ай бұрын
Wow, I’ve pursued the marathon goal just as you have, consistently achieving identical outcomes. Thank you for this video! A goldmine of insights.😅
@StitchCraftDiaries
Ай бұрын
I’ve never hit subscribe so fast
@johnnewton2980
Ай бұрын
Thanks
@sandyyvonallain
Ай бұрын
Thank you... thank you talking about this. I thought I was crazy....🎉😢
@Miss_Annlaug
Ай бұрын
The marathon example is good❤
@mohibquadri4053
Ай бұрын
Could you suggest some tips to tackle hopelessness and mastering our mood..
@CarenMagill
Ай бұрын
That’s a journey, not something I can give you tips to help. But it starts with wanting to change, and being willing to see where you are succeeding.
@mohibquadri4053
Ай бұрын
@@CarenMagill which videos around this topic would be helpful.. also how to gain momentum or reduce fear of outcome..
@amartini74
Ай бұрын
For me its been helpful to get up early in the morning and go for a walk/jog. I don't find it easy to do due to feeling horrible during this time of the day, but if I don't get up I'll sleep in and feel tired and hopeless for half a day before I get anything started. I don't push myself too hard when running, it's more for the mindset and mood lifting aspects that I do it for. If I push too hard I will be too sore to continue so I take it easy. On return, I'll sit down with a cup of coffee and journal about whatever is bothering me on my notes app on my phone. I have different tabs on different topics and I find the journaling of my story helpful as it often leads to new perspectives and plans. I can come back to a topic later if it comes up again and add or change perspectives if needed. Its been a long process of self discovery and I hope sharing may be helpful. Best wishes.
@mohibquadri4053
Ай бұрын
@@amartini74 Thanks a Ton !!
@Heyu7her3
Ай бұрын
@@mohibquadri4053 meds
@joer1402
Ай бұрын
Thank you. That's all I have to say.
@CarenMagill
Ай бұрын
You are welcome!!!
@ReadingStitching
Ай бұрын
Omg!! This is me! I have some questions about your program
@rhododendro7
Ай бұрын
Thank you
@rossjones2439
Ай бұрын
thankyou
@GoThaliaGoThaliaGo
Ай бұрын
Can you put the chapter markers in your video? Please
@gandalfvonfedlemeyer7859
Ай бұрын
Why is there a scary goat head staring at us over your left shoulder?
@TealTendrils
Ай бұрын
Sounds a wee bit like WOOP :) Yes, my brain in a nutshell.
@mreese8764
Ай бұрын
The audio quality is distactingly low.
@jackjfb8439
Ай бұрын
The handles of the bureau door on your right (our left) are not parallel. The handle on the right appears to be askew. Just sayin’
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