But he doesn't do it in public, right? He can control himself. He doesn't want to
@libbypaige6160
2 ай бұрын
100%
@Cutest1TheGame
2 ай бұрын
Yep.
@wendy8617
11 күн бұрын
Yes! I bet people say what a nice guy he is.
@karen-wp4lc
11 күн бұрын
Oh yeah………..
@MixxxedFruuts
9 күн бұрын
Exactly
@zachwallace8274
5 ай бұрын
Barricading your wife in a room while you scream at her is wild. Thats a step away from a mistake you cant come back from. Thats scary.
@chuckgoodman3828
5 ай бұрын
We only have one side of the story here! Abuse is almost never one way in relationships!
@blueseptember2174
5 ай бұрын
@chuckgoodman3828 actually it usually is onesided😮. The victim reacting is not contributing to abuse.
@jackieoconnor4926
5 ай бұрын
@@chuckgoodman3828I agree that relatively frequently both parties contribute to an abusive relationship. However I don’t agree that one way abuse is “almost never” the case. At absolute maximum, it’s about a 50/50 split between mutual abuse and one sided abuse. Yes, we only have one side of the story, but listening to this woman (which is all we have to go on) it’s clear she’s extremely upset by the situation. She sounds very concerned for her husband’s mental health and that doesn’t resonate with someone who is contributing to the problem. All the Doc can do is say, based on what I hear, this sounds unhealthy and you need to make sure your kids are safe. I’m pretty sure that’s exactly the advice most of us would give to a friend. Nobody knows what goes on inside a marriage but generally, when someone reaches out for help, they’re probably in need of help.
@chuckgoodman3828
5 ай бұрын
@@blueseptember2174 And who usually initiates the abuse? Answer - women! So by your statement, the men are only reacting to the abuse making it one way! Good to know!
@dachater1
5 ай бұрын
@@chuckgoodman3828 what a lame comment
@TheEquiss
5 ай бұрын
I dealt with the crazy. Was married 35 years. The last 5 I got the constant accusations and screaming. I got sick of it. Found out afterward that all his accusations were actually things he was doing-cheating with multiple people and drained our savings. I caught him cheating and filed for divorce. I will never ever ever be married or deal with a guy ever again. It’s not worth it. It’s so much more peaceful living and being alone.
@bookmarker7471
5 ай бұрын
35 years goodness gracious 😮
@soulsounds4575
5 ай бұрын
30 yrs of madness like this…gaslighting, accusations,financial abuse,cheating me and my kids walking on egg shells till one day poof he was gone guess what I’m so much better…never again no sir
@annaelisavettavonnedozza9607
5 ай бұрын
I am so glad you finally got out! You are worth it
@beastshawnee
5 ай бұрын
It’s MARRIAGE FREE! Feels like heaven.
@beastshawnee
5 ай бұрын
Also the teeth- give him funny stories - “I traded them to some pirates for gold coins!” “I bit down on a train and it kept going!” “Godzilla punched me and I swallowed them!” “I donated them so a toothless lion could eat cheeseburgers!” It an ongoing thing to laugh with…rather than be worried!
@caseyjude5472
5 ай бұрын
So she’s raising 4 children completely on her own- mentally, physically, emotionally AND financially . Divorce-she’ll have one last child to care for, more money for her actual kid’s futures & more time to herself. He’s not worth it & not her responsibility to raise. No more Build-A-Man.
@sarahwales6276
4 ай бұрын
Agreed, you don't want a man that requires an ultimatum to step up, they need to be self-motivated for it to last.
@SarTafoolya
21 күн бұрын
So true you are spot on!
@jilljohnson251
5 ай бұрын
For the first caller, the instance of him yelling at her in the car with the 3 kids is particularly concerning. From a personal perspective, being a child in this situation is terrifying. There is no where to hide and you can't shut your eyes or cover your ears tight enough.
@amaristhecrow7084
3 ай бұрын
Yes! My dad used to pull the keys out of the ignition and start screaming at an berating my mom while she frantically tries to get to the side of the road with a locked wheel. Omg. The other day she talked about it (My twin and I were the youngest and are in our 40s) and asked if we remembered that. I am afraid of highways because of how freaked out I was at both being trapped in the car with him and her panicking and seeming unable to drive .
@susanlee8023
Ай бұрын
I’m 62 and I still carry a lot of stuff around from my parents’ early fighting. They grew out of it, but it’s still alive in me.
@ColonelKlink100
12 күн бұрын
@@amaristhecrow7084 Oh my god Amaris, that's terrifying!
@mwhe3111
5 ай бұрын
For the first caller - if something doesn't change, she is showing those three kids that this is what love and marriage are supposed to look like.
@thestorybehindthat5236
5 ай бұрын
Sometimes it is. Hope he turns it around. There are limits.
@will-vp9ng
5 ай бұрын
or maybe she isn't telling the full story?
@bobby9192
5 ай бұрын
@@will-vp9ngyea, seems like if she was perfect she would find someone. Or she’s so perfect no one will ever live up to her high expectations. And she’s probably obese
@suds9365
5 ай бұрын
@@will-vp9ngShe probably isn’t, but since it is only her John, and the audience, just have to take her at her word 🫤
@ggrace1133
4 ай бұрын
Yep. He is too.
@TheLadyWolf1
5 ай бұрын
Every time I think I'd like to be in a relationship, get married and start a family, I watch a couple of these videos and I'm cured.😂😅
@JustRaine97
5 ай бұрын
😂😂😂
@elainebmack
5 ай бұрын
I HEARD that! Relationships, marriage, and all that comes with them both are fraught with major, life-threatening risks that I am not willing to take.
@nancyyesko9202
5 ай бұрын
Remember though, only people with problems call in. I worked as veterinarian technician for 9 yrs and after awhile it seemed like all the animals in our area were sick. I got 2 dogs of my own and they've never been sick. 😊 2 divorced and at 40 yrs old finally met my current husband who is a peach. 28 yrs we have been very happy. Good luck to you.
@BillionaireKing1996
5 ай бұрын
@@elainebmackthese people are not the norm. And they ignore red flags and stay in relationships they shouldn’t .
@davinasquirrel7672
4 ай бұрын
@@BillionaireKing1996 Is that poor phrasing on your part (ignoring red flags)? Basically it is hard to understand a foreign language if you have never been taught. Sure, you may understand the odd word, but rarely a whole sentence. Primarily it is those who are trained in the field, or those that have gone through it and come out the other side that truly understand it. Rarely is it a case of him punching you in the face on the first date, but a very slow reconditioning of moving boundaries and getting worse over time. That is the slowly boiling frog analogy, and pretty much the mechanics of it. Also, there are more psychological abusers that never hit, and the victim has no idea because "he hasn't hit me", when all the other boxes of abuse have been checked. But some victims (and outsiders) just do not understand the process. The other thing I would add, the absolute majority of DV victims I have ever known, are the kindest and most compassionate and empathetic people ever - and that is exactly why abusers target them.
@susanh1447
5 ай бұрын
I was living her life, only with no kids. My cat and I are now living in peace, no anger in our beautiful apartment. God has been healing me for over a year. I don’t miss my husband, but I miss my dream of us.
@annewalden3795
4 ай бұрын
Susan you are brave and I wish you and your Cat good fortune .
@beaglerescue5281
2 ай бұрын
Yes! Sometimes we have to give up the dream and accept reality.
@susanlee8023
Ай бұрын
Thanks for sharing your beautiful perspective
@Mama.bear.
28 күн бұрын
Missing the dream, that’s so poignant. 😭
@DC-se3ko
5 ай бұрын
OMG “it’s different when you’re in it” No truer words
@KoolT
5 ай бұрын
Run ,if you can't immediately plan it. Save but go.😢
@kaidiver4306
5 ай бұрын
Damn, 1st caller brought me to tears. Her story reminds me of MY MOMMY n her husband. MY MOMMY stayed till the end. She had no one to turn to. I heard my parents fight almost e.v.e.r.y d.a.y. MY MOMMY stayed, fresh from a different country, 4 kids really young at the time, MOMMY had a shitty job that didn't pay much, old school mentality where is never even heard of. MY MOMMY SACRIFICE HER MIND, BODY AND SOUL for us to get us by. THANK YOU MOMMY FOR ALL YOUR SACRIFICES I LOVE YOU MOMMY REST IN PARADISE I MISS YOU
@JustRaine97
5 ай бұрын
Sounds like a really special lady. I'm sorry she had to endure so much.😢
@lavendarlounge67
4 ай бұрын
Your mom is a great mom & an angel ! She have you & your siblings ! That’s her greatest accomplishment ! Unfortunately in the old days, that’s the usual case and even nowadays is super hard on the moms.
@quantumjourney1
4 ай бұрын
Maniac
@kaidiver4306
4 ай бұрын
@@JustRaine97 THANK YOU SO MUCH. MY MOMMY WENT FLYING APRIL 20, 2023. TODAY IS MOTHERS DAY. I WOKE THIS MORNING CRYING. MY MOMMYS IS A HELLA OF A FIGHTER. CAUGHT COVID TWICE. AND WAS VERY I MEAN VERY PRONE TO GET IT. DEALT WITH MY DAD FOR SOOOOO MANY YEARS. SOME KID REALLY TRIES TO SMUG HER. BEAT HER UP WITH A BAT, MANAGE TO WALK THE REST HOME.. CALLED THE COPS. BUT NEVER CAUGHT THE GUY. I THOUGHT, WE WERE GOIN TO LOSE HER. SHE WAS BLEEDING VERY VERY BAD. WHERE SUCH A SMALLLL CUT, SHE BLEEDS AND TAKE SUCH A LONG TO HEAL. MY MOMMY WAS IN HER LATE 60'S WHEN SHE GOT SMUG. REALLY, WTF!! I MEAN DAMN, FVCK MAN!! when it was that very time to pull the plug was theeee hardest thing to do. Its 2am im writing all these. I am in complete tears. Me and little brother will be chillin with MY MOMMY. HAVE HER FAVORITE FOOD, FAVORITE SNACK AND FAVORITE DRINKS AND YES HER FAVORITE ROSES.. RED, PINK AND YELLOW
@kaidiver4306
4 ай бұрын
@@lavendarlounge67 THANK YOU VERY MUCH. ITS 2AM MAY 12, 2024. ITS MOTHERS DAY. IM IN COMPLETE TEARS WRITING THIS. DAMN, I HELLLLA FUCKING MISS MY MOMMY!! i woke up this morming in tears. ITS SOOO DAMN HARD.. I LOVE YOU MOMMY I MISS YOU
@kristencobb230
5 ай бұрын
I’ve been where the first caller is. I was in a 25 year marriage. I waited entirely too long to get out and it hurt my kids. We are all healing now. My biggest advice would be to get out when the kids are small. Don’t wait until they are teens. It escalates and it gets harder to leave. Go now and start over. It’s so much better on the other side. Praying for her.
@blueseptember2174
5 ай бұрын
I wish I knew someone like you in person. I have so many questions I think you could answer.
@Erica-wz8yv
5 ай бұрын
This makes me feel better about leaving after 6 years of marriage, 2 very young kids. I still feel bad that my youngest has no memory of our family being together. But I know it’s for the best in the long run.
@tonyamedsker213
5 ай бұрын
@@Erica-wz8yvif it was bad, you did your youngest a huge favor because NOBODY should have to try and forget when things were bad. 😔
@Carriesue1982
5 ай бұрын
@@Erica-wz8yvif it helps my mom never left my abusive step father until I was in my 20’s and moved out. I now suffer as an adult from complex trauma due to years of abuse and she and I have very little relationship to speak of. I often wonder about the person I would have been if she stood up for me and left him early on. You did the right thing
@jamiehendricks4938
4 ай бұрын
I concur. 27 years of heartbreak, and THEN he left. Best thing that ever happened to me. .WORST thing that happened to my boys. They were teens at the time, and it BROKE them. Should've left him the day after my youngest was born.
@Newtonwilson-yw4kg
5 ай бұрын
Perfect marriages or relationships simply don't exist. There's no one-size-fits-all approach to navigating them. What may be effective for Adam might not resonate with Peter. However, I've come to realize that there's always a solution to every problem. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such difficulties in our marriage that divorce seemed imminent. Despite the ordeal, we persevered, and today, we've triumphed over that rough patch, reunited and stronger than ever
@user-sk7kd8vs2w
5 ай бұрын
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
@Newtonwilson-yw4kg
5 ай бұрын
Letting go of someone you love is always challenging, but in my situation, I had the guidance of a spiritual counselor who prevented my marriage from falling apart. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
@user-sk7kd8vs2w
5 ай бұрын
This is helpful, I will look her up online right now.... I hope this works for me too, I really miss her.
@Newtonwilson-yw4kg
5 ай бұрын
You definitely should. You wont regret it
@carlel121
4 ай бұрын
Well, that needs the work of both of you, but if one is not willing to work for the relationship and put any effort, it’s over.
@kawa99
5 ай бұрын
I hope this lady sees this comment. If she does not leave or if the husband does not get better, their children will think that what is happening is normal, that being berated is normal, being verbally abused is normal, and when they grow up it is going to affect their relationship with their future partners.
@amybouchard
4 ай бұрын
This is 100% the truth. My mom wouldn’t demand civil discussion and allowed herself to spoke to worse than a criminal who has committed the worst crime ever. 30 years later, I’ve given up on relationships because I kept being attracted to men who abused me mentally, and my sister is involved with an escalating situation with her boyfriend who is super possessive and has her cutting off her family. Please, people. Never allow anyone to speak to you in a disrespectful way. For your mental health and your children.
@Cyge240sx
5 ай бұрын
My wife caught me watching this and got super excited took my phone and now she is bingeing on all these episodes
@franziskani
5 ай бұрын
Caught red handed are you ? ;)
@christinewoodland5127
5 ай бұрын
😂
@ggrace1133
4 ай бұрын
For the win, man!
@bcc7777
2 күн бұрын
😂 😂 😂 Took your phone!
@carlel121
5 ай бұрын
Listening to her story make me cry because my husband has yelled at me and throw things violently in my house, thanks God I don’t have children, he never had called me names or hit me, he says I will never do it, but throwing things and yelling at me is a type of abuse too among others things that I cant handle anymore! I’m ready to leave him, nobody will convence me otherwise!
@davinasquirrel7672
4 ай бұрын
Carlel, sorry to hear that. At best you are living with a toddler, at worst you are living with an abuser. Neither type has any intention of changing. Consider an exit strategy when you feel safe.
@melodyc123
5 ай бұрын
when a husband starts to abuse you in front of your kids.... leave. don't think about him, his feelings, coming back. Those things aren't in your control. Leave. Let go of this situation. I can see trying to hold on after he cheats...but he's doing things in front of the kids. It's about this kids. Leave.
@MrDedvalson
5 ай бұрын
He is having affairs! Not contributing financially? Oh hell no. Court will order child support!
@TG-nh6ni
5 ай бұрын
That's my initial suspicion as well.
@regretfulsin
5 ай бұрын
Court might make her pay child support to him. And court can also force her to pay alimony potentially. The family court system is not fair at all
@aciemahon9248
5 ай бұрын
Hopefully he’s not another Chris watts.
@regretfulsin
5 ай бұрын
@@SarahConnor562 If it were a normal relationship then yes. But someone who is being abused shouldn't have to pay their abuser 😐
@ST-rj8iu
5 ай бұрын
@@SarahConnor562 who is watching the kids? Women that get child support watch the kids.
@elyse443
5 ай бұрын
Whew! First caller is racing against the clock to accept that he’s about to become physically abusive and injure her and get out.
@JudePi-jx7yo
5 ай бұрын
Does that actually happen after years? She said not physically barricaded. He might have a mental illness because he says he doesn't believe in god. We don;t know all details but it doesn't sound like escalation. Sounds like her description of it is escalating.
@Lavenderrose73
5 ай бұрын
@@JudePi-jx7yoit was also mentioned that he yelled at her in the car with all three children, accusing her of things the children said she didn't do. That sounds to me like escalating. I grew up in an abusive home, _she needs to _*_get out!_*
@wendypeeters7656
5 ай бұрын
@@JudePi-jx7yoalso he locked her in her bedroom a few hours. Did we listen to the same video?
@BuenProvecho22
5 ай бұрын
Yup, I had a coworker who got strangled by her husband! They found out because they found her two year old wondering the streets alone!😢 They tracked down where he lived and came in the house and found her lifeless body on the ground. He fled but the cops eventually got him. That day her three kids lost BOTH of their parents!😭😭😭 They lost their mom forever and they lost their dad for his horrible actions. Apparently he had been becoming very jealous and controlling, and eventually abusive… RIP Wendy.Ayllon, Elgin,Il😢😭😭😭💐
@JudePi-jx7yo
5 ай бұрын
@@wendypeeters7656 She said not physically kept me there. So it sounded like he kept talking to her and when she tried to leave he said we are not done talking. If he locked the door sounds physical to me and agreed.
@SMH610
5 ай бұрын
Girl ultimatum is no longer an option RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN NOW. Record ALL interactions. Use it to get full custody.
@SMH610
5 ай бұрын
You're dealing with a violent toddler. And toddlers throw tantrums. Get a safe exit strategy and utilize the men in your circle who will gladly escort you from a dangerous situation. Don't tell your husband you're leaving they show up you leave with them. Don't even speak to him
@BlackStump172
5 ай бұрын
That is abusive and she needs to get him out before he injures her and the kids . This guy has been gone for years. I bet that he has another woman since the youngest was one year old . That is five years ! At least she has a job but he does not contribute? What is he doing with his earnings ?
@staceystrukel1917
5 ай бұрын
He is injuring them. His behavior is emotional and mental abuse along with physical.
@ThimbleFox350
5 ай бұрын
@@SarahConnor562 verb (used with object),in·jured, in·jur·ing. to do or cause harm of any kind to; damage; hurt; impair: to injure one's hand. to do wrong or injustice to. You don't have to cause physical harm to injure someone. Emotional and verbal abuse can and does cause injury.
@joretta8251
5 ай бұрын
He’s either spending or hiding his money.
@angelaratzay9034
5 ай бұрын
Sara you don't know that mental torture is abuse? It's the worse kind of abuse because it can't be seen.
@GodessIsabelRaina
5 ай бұрын
Lady, get out of the FAIRYTALE❗️😡 You are living with a ticking time bomb❗️He has done something and is taking it out on YOU❗️Kids are next, then what❓️❗️ HOW DO WE COME BACK TOGETHER❓️😱YOUR HUSBAND DOESN'T WANT YOUUUUUUUU❗️ Why does everyone believe that a therapist is supposed to wave a magic wand to make everything alright❓️😳 The man is having an affair, and when things don't go right with his other family, she and the kids are in the backblast area 🔥 She has harbored a Hobose×ual meaning he pays very ĺittle to nothing. He lives Scot free. Sounds to me like his money is taking care of the other family. She wants to give an ultimatum when the other lady probably gave him an ultimatum 🥴 Bottom line is wifey doesn't want to give up her fairytale to an unworthy husband. Wait til the kids begin to treat her the way dad treats her😨
@AndriaBieberDesigns
5 ай бұрын
He’s abusing you. Leave. It gets worse. I know. Because my ex-husband started that way.. ( he was later diagnosed by the court system as narcissistic sociopath)
@beaglerescue5281
2 ай бұрын
The screaming at her in the car is definitely a narcissistic trait. The scapegoat is stuck and cannot escape the abuse which makes him feel so good to unleash.
@bcc7777
2 күн бұрын
Yep! Narcissist.
@dachater1
5 ай бұрын
My heart goes out to this lady - awful situation to be in! The husband is doing nothing about his issues and it's destroying his marriage and family, now she is forced to have to separate! Strength to this lady - the Lord is with you! Don't stay stuck - get out until and unless you and your kids will be safe. Nothing about his behaviour right now is safe.
@mariecleo214
5 ай бұрын
First caller : you don't know it yet but once you leave him you will be at peace and so much happier and be rid of him!!
@danilaroche1156
Ай бұрын
Separation & divorce is heart wrenching. Traumatizing. It takes some time to heal. Oftentimes...years.
@bcc7777
2 күн бұрын
Despite being very depressed and crying, much like the caller, I felt so relieved when I got rid of my abuser.
@staceystrukel1917
5 ай бұрын
My ex husband did the same exact behaviors. The car was the worst with people like this. The abuse gets worse.
@canecorsomom2023
5 ай бұрын
Same. I made excuses and rationalized it But then I had to start wearing heavy makeup and hoodies in the summer
@amypope7933
5 ай бұрын
Yes, it does. And no amount of their depression or trauma can justify that abuse
@susanlink8453
5 ай бұрын
Mine too, I hung in there hoping it would get better, it got worse... should have left before I did...😢
@jemmajames6719
5 ай бұрын
My husband has driven fast a few times to scare me once when the kids were children and in the car, he also drove fast in the past swerving between parked cars. If I could have left I would have, especially now I think it has affected my kids.
@kerrytraynor2642
5 ай бұрын
The car thing is so real…
@Viperclass
5 ай бұрын
My friend taught his kid to mock bullies by saying "who makes fun of birth defects, dude 🙄" it worked.
@bcc7777
2 күн бұрын
Mhmm. I tell my kids these kinds of things too. There was an incident last year at my son's school where a girl said "bet your dad would be real proud of you"... And his dad is deceased. These kids are just getting so nasty.
@lindanj9830
5 ай бұрын
Marie, the first caller, is the breadwinner . It is never OK for a woman to put up with this but in her situation there are even fewer reasons to stay. Many women tolerate more than they should because they don't have any or enough income, I have seen this firsthand. Run Marie - there are plenty of men who would love to have someone like you.
@elainebmack
5 ай бұрын
"...plenty of men who would love to have someone like you..." With all due respect to the intent of your last comment, I don't think so. Men do not like women who take charge. Not these days. She may find nothing but momma's boys, unemployed losers, or "men" who will eventually seek to cut her down a peg or two so they will feel more secure. Besides that, the last thing this woman needs is yet another "relationship", which should not be offered up like some sort of consolation prize.
@spursfan5742
3 ай бұрын
Unfortunately she may have to pay alimony if she makes more than him, which can keep people from leaving.
@lindanj9830
3 ай бұрын
@@spursfan5742 It would be worth every dime!! And from my experience - you earn more if you are valued at work and at home- this might mean more in alimony but your net will still be higher.
@kenlang2154
2 ай бұрын
🙄 Marie thinks she holds the same position at home as she does at work, she doesn't and that's her problem.
@Bobobobahbear
29 күн бұрын
@@kenlang2154 projecting
@Imaginarysonics
5 ай бұрын
Caller 1, you aren't and shouldn't get back together. That's a fantasy. Get your kids out, this isn't fair to them. Out here in Los Angeles we just had a horrific murder/suicide incident that involved an infant, and the trend from early reports had to do with escalating verbal fights leading up to it. Your marriage is over and you are in danger. Please leave.
@oterosocram25
5 ай бұрын
Not a wise advise and to quickly compare her situation to an extreme one is not wise either. IF and only IF that's the case that what she is saying is 100% accurate then ok, She should seek help right of way but we have to listen to both sides first, which we didn't. You have absolutely no clue what she is doing to cause issues in the marriage that may be triggering this individual, bad decisions, mother in law, threatening, lack of memory, lack of discipline, constant disrispect, constant bickering, etc. we should never believe and respond based on one persons take, and responding to the same side without hearing the other is a big no no
@Imaginarysonics
5 ай бұрын
@@oterosocram25 he’s physically cornering her and verbally abusing her for hours on end to the point that she’s in tears and her friends want her out and she seems afraid to leave. With respect, this woman is in danger and her situation seems to be escalating.
@AzothDee
5 ай бұрын
Exactly. Violence escalates and something simple as throwing an object IS violence. "What Every Body is Saying" by an ex FBI agent goes into this behaviour and how to observe it in order to keep oneself safe. It is a small stone at first always.
@AzothDee
5 ай бұрын
@@oterosocram25highly incorrect.
@Imaginarysonics
5 ай бұрын
@@oterosocram25 Jesus Christ, are you an abuser? This is victim blaming to a T. Lack of discipline? Constant disrespect? The response to this isn’t cornering your spouse and verbally abusing them. The amount of misogynistic victim blaming or disbelief in the Christian community never ceases to amaze me…
@fakesushii
5 ай бұрын
I felt like I was listening to myself in the first call - thank you for the enlightenment and expertise. prayers for that strong lady.
@gabrielwatson7721
5 ай бұрын
Prayers for you, too. You're strong. God is with you, and so are we! ✝️🙏✝️
@fakesushii
5 ай бұрын
@@gabrielwatson7721 very kind of you. I appreciate it! ❤️🙏
@sarastrange5282
5 ай бұрын
Girl, theres no coming back together, you leave, theres no saving him, you need to save yourself !
@GameChanger597
5 ай бұрын
And especially those kids!!
@will-vp9ng
5 ай бұрын
she couldn't be lying or not telling the whole truth no one has ever done that! going from full on balling your eyes out to speaking normally and laughing is kinda strange.
@Poppy-zm2yh
5 ай бұрын
@@will-vp9ng I don't think you have ever interacted with a person who cried in front of you if you think that's strange. It's a perfectly normal behavior to alternate moments of calm and clarity to moments of bawling your eyes out, to laughter, and sometimes even laughing WHILE you are bawling your eyes out. Also, this isn't a court case. It's not about what the hard truth is. It's about feeling whether you can keep going in the marriage or not. Even if she made everything up just to hear someone say "leave him", well, that's reason enough to divorce because it means you already want to leave. So just leave.
@will-vp9ng
5 ай бұрын
@@Poppy-zm2yh why bother getting married in the first place then lol…? She sounds like a narcissist. John wouldn’t have handled this call the same way if it was the husband calling about a wife he’d give what he calls “ tough love “ and he would say things like “ I can only go off of what you are telling me “ which he didn’t do once during this call… he took the information he was given as 100% truth and asked 1 question which she half ass answered with an “ idk “. These are facts listen to almost any other call of his. I’ve had several conversations like this with close friends unfortunately none of which have resulted in someone going from crying their eyes out then 3 seconds later when someone affirms your feelings with 0 evidence speaking normally and laughing. She doesn’t care and hasn’t cared about this marriage and clearly isn’t telling the whole truth. No denying that.
@Poppy-zm2yh
5 ай бұрын
@@will-vp9ng you are projecting so much into this, it's honestly sad. What she decides to do is her own business. This calls are to seek advice, not to be put under trial. I've dealt with diagnosable narcissists, including women. She doesn't come off as one at all. Marriage is a partnership. That's the point of it. Sometimes it works out, some times it doesn't. Reguardless of who's fault it is, when one or both of you start screaming in front of the kids, it's time to part ways. That is unless you'd like for them to piss the bed until they are 14yo and have severe relational issues for the rest of their lives. Also, again, other than my experiences with family and friends, I've gone to therapy and my sessions were pretty much like this, actually the change between crying and casually chatting and laughing was way stronger. Her demeanor was perfectly normal. He made some jokes to make her snap out of that mental state and it worked, nothing unusual in it.
@alwaysyouramanda
5 ай бұрын
I can tell she’s giving him so much grace..
@Myglowtips
5 ай бұрын
If the first caller really wants her husband to get better, really loves her children and really wants a future, she has to leave. That separation is vital. Not her running back like a dog but really decide for her, if he does not stop making her children‘s lives miserable, she has to leave. She‘s more worried about her musty husband‘s mental health than the mental health of her innocent children that they are both destroying. Leave. I mean, how many more children needs to be ruined by parents who cannot make decisions.
@blueseptember2174
5 ай бұрын
Not musty 😅
@tashasc1
5 ай бұрын
...and dusty!😂
@LisaPFrampton
5 ай бұрын
So easy to say
@hillarybillary21
5 ай бұрын
She won’t admit it like most of these women but their own seggs lives are at the forefront of their decision making.
@inyamers8532
5 ай бұрын
Is he also rusty?
@jangrosemartindale8740
5 ай бұрын
Breaks my heart- I had to leave my son’s Bio Dad, who was my husband, there at our son’s birth, because he physically & verbally abused me. Best decision I ever made! As I left when our son was 5, & kept emphasizing his GrandDeddy (whom he worshipped) NEVER beat my mother. I explained over & over, almost couples argue at some time, but beating each other is always wrong.
@daleweiss9507
5 ай бұрын
You picked him.
@glitzyugi716
5 ай бұрын
@@daleweiss9507 bot detected
@Kimberly....
5 ай бұрын
My daughter was in kindergarten with a little boy who also didn't have front teeth. When they were lining up to go inside, the kids were all asking him about it, and he said. "My mouth is making room for my super teeth. I get to get super special teeth when I'm bigger." The kids were excited that "super teeth" were a thing then started showing each other their "regular teeth" and their loose teeth. None of the kids cared.
@LadyWillanger
5 ай бұрын
EMILY- if you read this, my oldest daughter had her front baby teeth knocked out in an accident at 2 years old. At 5 years old our amazing dentist made a “bridge” for her with two fake front teeth. It was an easy procedure and her teeth looked absolutely GORGEOUS. It was just a wire that they temporarily cemented into her mouth with two fake teeth attached. They monitored it closely and removed it once her big girl teeth were emerging. It might be worth exploring if it’s something your son is self conscious about. His eyes sound amazing and you are an incredible mom! God bless!!
@Hatbox948
3 ай бұрын
Also check out "Instant Smile" and "Denturi Denture Kits".
@bcc7777
2 күн бұрын
My late husband had his two front PERMANENT teeth knocked out and had to have implants at the young age of like 12? But they looked amazing.
@DM-gb9xq
4 ай бұрын
I've had this done to me. He was a monster. I had not seen him in 5 years and I ran into him at a doctor's office appt.. I had a panic attack and ran. Many abusers need to be in jail. They are unfit. My ex works at a church also. I didn't press charges b/c I was so afraid of him getting revenge..
@MCC4RTHY1
5 ай бұрын
I feel this chicks story so much. You are not alone. I made an ultimatum with my husband. I told him I give this a year with a therapist or I’m out. Then “lost” in job, now I’m working and providing but we don’t have the money now for therapy. Fancy that. I’m completely trapped. It’s super hard. I totally feel what all women in this situation are going through.
@sds6303
5 ай бұрын
You are NOT trapped. Talk to an attorney. You are choosing to be trapped. If he lost his job, that’s on him, not you.
@midnightblue117
5 ай бұрын
Trapped?...meaning what????
@franziskani
5 ай бұрын
Did you mean _he_ lost his job (as you are providing). If the did not find another job - he is preparing to get alimony from you (or not having to pay). Go to an attorney. The ultimatum is supposed to snap him or her out of whatever. Sometimes complacency sets it or it is hard for the other partner to change and a crisis provides the needed nudge (kick in the behind). Your husband also got a nudge - he made NO efforts to make the therapy sessions possible (financially). And he got a nudge to become unemployed if I read that correctly. I guess if his unemployment did not last too long he will not be able to claim spousal support (from you). Good luck to you.
@tonyamedsker213
5 ай бұрын
It's time you fight!! Make an escape plan REGARDLESS of what it is and SAVE YOURSELF MORE YEARS OF EMOTIONAL AND FINANCIAL HARDSHIP THAT IS BOUND TO COME!! Been there done that allowing him to tell everybody a completely different version of our "HOME LIFE!" It was like I was living in a different reality before it was all over! Idk HOW I SURVIVED!! The death threats had me terrified but he took his anger out on his side pieces SIDE PIECE! Did a drive by on him and got a slap on the wrist basically. Got out of prison 1 1/2 yrs later thinking we'd get back together... when I told him that wasn't happening SUDDENLY HE WAS TARGETING ME AGAIN! Life is too short to live like that!! Our children have to live with the aftermath and THATS SOOO HARD TO WATCH... they have no relationship with their dad... their choice. Too bad it took AGING OUT so the courts didn't keep making me force them to spend time with him... so much more to this story... AND NOBODY COULD MAKE THIS UP UNLESS THEY MAKE MOVIES!
@chrissyellem7397
5 ай бұрын
Trapped?! Get the hell out. YOU have a job and therefore money to support YOURSELF. Get a lawyer and divorce this loser.
@TheRosyCross
4 ай бұрын
I am very short and fat. One day while I was walking though a shopping center, three boys were walking toward and one of them said, "you are sure fat", my response was, "good eyes." The other two boys laughed at their friend and added, "Yeah, good eyes." We can't help how we look to others, we can control our response, and, some times, have fun with it.
@Jkaye13
2 ай бұрын
That's a great response.. one I'm sure they weren't expecting and a way to disarm their response. Stay true to yourself! 💗
@user-dy6ie1up6i
Ай бұрын
Love this!
@christinamartinez8132
5 ай бұрын
My daughter's dad would berate me when his brothers, cousins and their girlfriends were all living with us, and when we went to visit his family. It would be a huge fight between us and our toddler daughter would run grab onto me. My in -laws and sister in laws always protected me from him attacking me. He would always talk to me like I was beneath him. He would leave me holding our baby and her diaper bag and shut the door, as if we weren't coming in behind him. He was the most narcissistic and toxic man child I've ever met or even come across. He was a sexual sadist. We lived temporarily with a few of his relatives so they saw for themselves how bad he mistreated me even when they were around. My Mom eventually made me get therapy and I took my rose colored glasses off and I left him, and I never took him back.
@mildajasaite871
5 ай бұрын
Did he want to go back?
@tonyamedsker213
5 ай бұрын
You're so lucky the in-laws pd attention and did the right thing... my in-laws made excuses as to why he was the way he was... TELLING ME I JUST HAD TO BE TOUGHER! Like WHO CAN SAY THAT WHEN THERES CHILDREN INVOLVED was always my thinking. My life was hell until our kids turned 18! ALONG WITH OUR KIDS! The court would always push for them to spend time with him CAUSING SO MUCH MORE DAMAGE. It's heartbreaking!! Now THEY ARE LEFT STRUGGLING WITH THEIR RELATIONSHIPS OR AVOIDING THEM ALL TOGETHER... it's SOO heartbreaking.
@tonyamedsker213
5 ай бұрын
@@mildajasaite871most do... and when they are told it's not going to happen... the children are USED AS PAWNS until they have the ability to decide they DONT AND ARENT GOING TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH THEIR FATHER... it's such a vicious cycle that feels unbearable but with the grace of Gods hand we all managed to survive. 😔
@christinamartinez8132
3 ай бұрын
@@mildajasaite871 It's been twenty two years since I left him, and his girlfriends have told me that he always compares them to me and he tells them that they could never compare to my loyalty. They always cheated back on him and I never cheated on him. He deserves the mistreatment. He was extremely abusive and has gotten worse after he was in prison for six and a half years. He's more of a predator.
@hopebell2659
5 ай бұрын
Couples therapy does not work in abusive relationships. Separate, heal yourself, and get away from an unsafe person
@diane4488
5 ай бұрын
My friend's daughter had beautiful blonde hair, stunning blue eyes, and is just naturally stunning. She's always had a beautiful, gentle, loving personality. She got badly bullied by a teacher, for several years, at primary school. She made her very anxious, and unhappy for a long time. Although the teacher bullied a number of children, and had dozens of complaints by parents, the school supported her, kept her on, and even moved the teacher up, for a few years, with the same class. It was incredibly toxic. Sometimes you are not disabled, or different, but people or children can be incredibly mean and nasty. She grew up into a beautiful woman, with a lovely family of her own, living a very successful and happy life. God bless all those children, who experience bullying. 🙏🏻💙🙏🏻💙🙏🏻
@Hatbox948
3 ай бұрын
I'm relatively attractive and very normal looking. I have big eyes, and was bullied in grade school for being "bug eyed". It was one girl in particular who did it, but she had flying monkeys. You're right. You don't have to be odd to get bullied.
@diane4488
3 ай бұрын
@@Hatbox948 So sorry you experienced that. Bullies literally can attack anyone, for very trivial reasons, often only known to them. Often, just because they can. Bless you, and wishing you a wonderful life. 💜🙏🏻💜🙏🏻💜
@chadkiddck
3 ай бұрын
Mothers are often worried about the trauma their children will experience if they divorce an abusive husband, but I'm a lot less screwed up now thanks to my mom leaving when she did. I've had other father figures in my life, but I can't imagine the trauma I'd be facing right now if my mom decided to stay through the abuse.
@elizabethrose5007
5 ай бұрын
I don't like to see marriage fail. This woman need to get out now because this is only going to escalate , 🙏🙏🙏🙏.
@will-vp9ng
5 ай бұрын
She couldn't possibly be lying right?
@delightschwartz2155
2 ай бұрын
@@will-vp9nganyone can lie.
@will-vp9ng
2 ай бұрын
@@delightschwartz2155 thanks captain obvious.
@LauraSnow-in3nx
5 ай бұрын
I feel so bad for her! You do NOT as a husband OR wife, get to barricade your spa into a room so you can scream at them. WOW!
@user-mc9du9xk2o
5 ай бұрын
Why is it always the woman's responsibility to save everyone and men just walk away? She's dealing with everything and he's not. How is that fair? Why isn't it also his responsibility to get help, go to work, take care of the kid's? If it was her she would do it all, by herself.! I'm tired of hearing oh just tell him to go. Where's her out? Her help?
@sds6303
5 ай бұрын
Because he is a narcissist who will never change. He doesn’t feel that he needs help. He doesn’t feel that he is the problem. In his mind, he’s perfect & everyone else has an issue. His narcissistic supply is stale, he’s now bored & checked out. He won’t change. It would be the same even if he was a woman
@SMH610
5 ай бұрын
THIS!!!!!!!!! Women are told it's thier responsibility to care for and deal with these broken ass men. Absolutely not. We DONT NEED MEN. Men are an option at best. Go fix yourself and leave us OUT OF IT. WE ARE NOT YOUR MOM, LOVER, THERAPIST, BEST FRIEND, YOUR BACKPACK TO STUFF ALL OF YOUR MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES. So sick of this mentality.
@annewalden3795
4 ай бұрын
Children have always been the responsibility of the mother as it is the natural consequence of human biology .Men can have multiple children until they are very old but there is a limit on female fertility .
@batkat0
3 ай бұрын
@@annewalden3795 Good thing we're not animals who are ruled by our genitals. Plenty of men create families and take care of them and take responsibility for them. And they do it with ease because they're good people who don't use flawed evolutionary psychology to justify being an ass.
@LauraSnow-in3nx
5 ай бұрын
Leave him! This is ridiculous. Have peace & just leave!
@annstewart8506
5 ай бұрын
Agree 💯!
@tonyamedsker213
5 ай бұрын
I hope you can get out and find peace.... I didn't find any peace until (other than his 1 1/2 yrs of prison for a drive by) it wasn't until our children were 18 and I no longer had to deal with him... that I've finally found my peace and life is good :) best of luck to ANYBODY IN THESE TYPES OF SITUATIONS...
@LolaB82
5 ай бұрын
That’s one of the things that always gets me. Is when they don’t remember half of the horrible things they said so they don’t even comprehend how much they hurt you.
@susanwagner98
5 ай бұрын
I used to think that but now I realize that's gaslighting. They know what they did.
@sixxlee890
4 ай бұрын
They remember. I was in an abusive relationship, and years later, my ex asked me why I put up with the things that he had said to me. They know, they just don't want to.
@shananagar1601
5 ай бұрын
A friend of mine, with a license to carry, said “I always have my gun on me, but if a guy wants to kick my ass, I’m gonna give them the opportunity. If a guy tries to kill me, at the moment that I think someone wants to kill me, that’s the moment he’ll know I have a gun.”
@Caseinpoint-f8z
5 ай бұрын
By “ultimatum” do you mean “restraining order”?
@libertyna933
3 ай бұрын
Yep guy is scary I'd be out.
@audreyoberg5931
5 ай бұрын
The last mom needs to know that him being born at 38 weeks would have nothing to do with any of his health issues. A baby born after 37 weeks is not premature. Don’t guilt yourself with that. 💕
@sixxlee890
4 ай бұрын
Absolutely. My daughter was born at 37 weeks, and she doesn't have any "abnormalities", if that's what they are. Heterochromia is something that some very cool famous people have - maybe point these people out to him too.
@CryingRaven
5 ай бұрын
I got out when the screaming berating started. Only after healing i realized that the abuse had been there in other forms all along. Thats probably what has happened here. Shes gaslit and not seeing things properly.
@hoorirafieian9612
3 ай бұрын
When she said “it’s didn’t when you’re in it”… it was so heartbreaking 😢
@raestone1760
3 ай бұрын
I have a child who will be significantly shorter than her peers. What John said to the mom of the child with different physical attributes made me cry. What a beautiful response.
@curiousone6129
5 ай бұрын
For the little boy with hetero chromia, wolves don't have eyes like this, but several dog breads do. Example is a husky Also resembles a wolf. Your boy would then have a friend with one of his own characteristics. Forest change the eyes, but makes him see that nature distributes such anomalies/gifts to only a special few. If your family is in the market for a dog, perhaps you could adopt a dog with this trait.
@user-wd2zh1cp2r
5 ай бұрын
I like that idea!
@mordecaiissad8529
5 ай бұрын
A teacher of mine a long time ago told me issuing an ultimatum is really just making an ultimatum with yourself. If it helps changing the situation great. But ultimately its about you deciding what youre willing to do.
@bcc7777
2 күн бұрын
First caller I was also concerned about my ex's mental health when I was in the process of breaking up with him. He sent me a picture of a gun to his head, he threatened suicide, he begged me and said he couldn't live without me. This is what abusers do! And he ended up being just fine, fine enough to hook up with and abuse two more women after me. GET OUT!
@Karen-jp1ns
5 ай бұрын
I was married to that exact man!!! Run! Don't look back!
@DarcyCarmen
5 ай бұрын
Dr John gets this LOOK on his face when the conversation steers towards violence against women or kids. I bet is wife can read it from across the room. It has “I will punch the dude in the face if this behaviour keeps up” vibes to it.
@janiceplowman5528
3 ай бұрын
You are so right that abuse of women and kids really sets him off.. He said that his wife has pulled him away at times and she mentioned a tell of how his jaw clenches in a certain way and yes it is visible even on the screen. Definitely can tell he is triggered but he usually control it pretty well. As a person who got hit a lot growing up without anyone seeming to care, it is actually good to see.
@shadowykitty5588
5 ай бұрын
My first ex husband screeched at me in the car and then threatened to crash the car and kill us both... Thats when I knew I was screwed and it went downhill after for the next 5 months until he called me from his mistress's bed and asked me to "guess where he was" while she giggled in the background... When he tried to blackmail me with papers on christmas morning, I snatched them and signed.
@davinasquirrel7672
4 ай бұрын
You actually had a lucky escape from that one. Threats to kill (or suicide) generally put them in the dangerous abuser category, who can be tricky to leave safely. Sounds as if his mistress (or maybe one of the mistresses?) made for a better target for him. You dodged a nuke.
@Tink6217
5 ай бұрын
This happened in my marriage. Lasted about 9 months. I sat my husband down after Christmas was over and told him ether you go to the doctors to get help tomorrow or I pack me amd the kids up and leave Tomorrow. He went to the doctors the next day and started medication. We had been together for 12 years and he flipped. He had a mental health breakdown after his brother was found guilty of doing some really horrible things. But I'll be clear I never He was sick but if he didn't go to the doctors I would already set to leave.
@cottoncandy9145
5 ай бұрын
My kid has unique body features and disabilities, Visible and invisible. From day one, I kept telling him he is beautiful and unique. Maybe looks different from us but that’s special about him. I openly talked people or his friends in school about his conditions in positive way. So he is also open and responding positive way when he was asked. 😊 sometime strangers made comment about him or especially kids in younger age made fun of my son. But he has confidence. He believes my words not other people say or think. Focus his self-confidence!
@bittehiereinfugen7723
5 ай бұрын
Very, very well done ❤️ We are ALL different, we are all VALUABLE and we are ALL good enough the way we are! I wish all parents would give their children this kind of love!
@gigi83578
2 ай бұрын
As a preschool / kindergarten teacher…..let your son go to school without bringing it up. Young kids may notice and be curious and that will be a good time to talk about it if he comes home with questions. I feel like my littles are not at a place where they are mean…..they don’t see race unless they are taught to. They are still so pure and curious and learning to be around new people. They are usually so accepting honestly 🥰
@jessawhite6429
5 ай бұрын
I 100% agree with how to talk to your kids about their differences and others. Anytime my kids have ever brought up a difference in other kids I acknowledge it and then talk about it positively, like when my daughter started preK she mentioned that some of her friends had darker skin (were very pale 😅) or she was the only kid in her class with blue eyes. So I said “isn’t that really cool that we can all look so different? How boring would it be if we all just looked the same?” Anytime we’ve seen a child who maybe uses a mobility device like a wheelchair and my kids say something I’ll point out something cool about their chair (he has green wheels on his chair! Isn’t that cool?) or try and point out something similar (he has a paw patrol backpack, just like you!) and then it’s never had to be a conversation again. It’s all in the way you frame it. My parents worked at a school for children with special needs and so growing up I was around a ton of different kids with different challenges in life but what I realized really young was that they wanted friends to play with, just like me. They liked to read, just like me. They liked watching cartoons, eating birthday cake, coloring, just like me. I’m grateful to have grown up with that lesson so young and am proud my kids are learning that too
@katherinebass530
5 ай бұрын
Marie: The first caller is the kind of lady I look up to. She's got this. I have scoliosis and small. My friends are protective of me. I get questions from children all the time. I encourage it.
@gabrielaortiz6463
5 ай бұрын
Always say do it for you kids if you won't do it for yourself because I was that kid and I resented my mom so much it made life extremly difficult and I'm still trying to repair the damage. Don't do that to your kids. They deserve a mom who stands up for them
@reneeantwi-boasiako3974
5 ай бұрын
Please dedicate an episode to true masculinity and feminity 🙏🏿❤
@gabrielaortiz6463
5 ай бұрын
One thing that helps with my son is I tell him to remember that the kids who are bullies are usually being bullied at home and that changed his perspective so much because now he knows this person isn't happy somehow they have to try to feel powerful
@AlexandraVioletta
3 ай бұрын
Jeah, I used the reverse card for my bullies at 7th grade (German school system. I was 14 y/o) and told them why their parents hated them. After that, and a few punches, they stopped bullying me physically. The name calling etc never stopped, but they never touched me again.
@blueseptember2174
5 ай бұрын
I would adopt a puppy with heterochromia(husky) so he can have a buddy always at home ❤ that understands. Edited to add: might be expensive im sure. But that might also show your son how highly valued that unique look is.
@MixxxedFruuts
9 күн бұрын
Always breaks my heart to hear of people being abused and how they don't always realize they are being abused. I was there once. It's just so overwhelming and confusing and I just feel for her so much. I hope she finds the life she deserves.
@yaelbrisman5359
5 ай бұрын
For the last caller. The movie "Wonder" is a great movis to watch about a kid starting school for the first with a facial deformity. It touches on a lot of your key concerns and a lot of the advice that Dr. John gave.
@Katt54
5 ай бұрын
The first step is always the hardest, but once shea is separated she will see things much more clearly. I know when I left my first marriage it took a little time, but then I realize it was the best decision I ever made and my daughter was only 3. Kids watch and what they see affects how they view relationships and I am sure no mother would want this same scenario for her child.
@alwaysyouramanda
5 ай бұрын
That kiddo is going to be so popular in high-school and college. We had this little person at our school and he was constantly surrounded by friends.
@rainbowhollywisdom681
5 ай бұрын
I have CP too🎉 but I’m still working on loving it all the way even though I had it all of my life and I’m 36 years old. I really don’t like it most of the time but I’m trying to love it ❤🎉🎉 I know that’s how to love my life all the way 😊not sure how to get there but I will and thankful to be alive 🎉🎉🎉 I do see the good in having a big challenge in life because of CP 🎉 Love the show 💛💛🤗
@shellbell2272
3 күн бұрын
My daughter was born with an eye condition that she had many surgeries for. She is basically blind in that eye, it turns in and is a different color and size from her healthy eye. Right from the start I explained her eye condition in front of people while she was young. She was able to hear how I explained it and used the same explanation to tell kids about it when they asked “what’s wrong with your eye?” She is empowered and most of her friends don’t even talk about it. Yes she has had mean things said to her. It will always break my heart. I tell her that looking different helps her to be compassionate to others. She knows what it’s like to have mean things said so she tried to be kind. I think it is her strength and super power. She is resilient and that’s something to celebrate. I love how she looks and tell her it makes her my girl.
@flaboysventures2697
2 ай бұрын
My middle son was born with transposition of the great vessels, open heart surgery at 4 days old… we always told him he was blessed.. played sports, grew up with a 10” scar on his sternum and we never babied him, today he’s 23, diesel mechanic and a business owner…! So proud of him.. he will be fine as long as he is loved and supported, medical treatments are improving very fast… he’s gonna be a fine person I’m sure!
@yetibluedog
5 ай бұрын
Another great investment of my time. Thank you :)
@vickyoli
3 ай бұрын
I was the “close” friend that had to intervene a friend to tell her she was a low key alcoholic. It was not just me noticing this but other would come to me to let me know she is wrong. She ended our friendship bc she didnt like the convo that I tried to have many times (either in person, on the phone or even written). Now she is fine I believe, thankfully (and denies her past as alcoholic). She has lost friend though.
@Alien_cancerian
5 ай бұрын
As a daughter that is 24 and disabled I wish my dad was more gentle with me and I wish my parents were as safe as this mom and her son.
@AzothDee
5 ай бұрын
Caller 1 his mental health is his own. A drowning man will pull down others.
@axlent123
5 ай бұрын
Emily, be prepared for when it happens.. it sucks, as you know, and I know… but to be available and open hearted and kind and compassionate … I think that’s what will be needed. A listening ear, an available ear… that’s what I think will be needed.. to be bullied is one thing, to be bullied and feeling alone, that’s a whole nother level!
@elaineventer9531
5 ай бұрын
I was in the exact same situation with a narcissist...when I told him I'm done he attempted suicide.. long story short he passed a few months after that attempt from kidney failure complications. You be strong girl... Get out while you can is my opinion
@JennHawk
5 ай бұрын
.....and you KNOW Caller 1 didn't tell us ALL of it.
@twebb200
5 ай бұрын
My son got 4 of his front teeth knocked out by a swing when he was 2 and a half...he went to school like that...he's 11 now and it was never an issue. I think the concern should be when he gets older but hopfully by then some dental intervention isnin place and it will become a total none issue. Love the fact that he has different coloured eyes! It's like a supernpower!❤
@nathaliebasile6168
4 ай бұрын
Marie. I am so sorry. John’s concerns are right on. If your children feel like they have to defend you or get involved. that’s not fair. Sometimes when we love someone so much we follow them in the whole they are placing themselves in. Your children are so young. Their needs so great. There is no room in any relationship for verbal abuse. Once you are able to take time apart from him and feel again what peacefulness feels like ; you are going to be able to make decisions. Wish you the best. Courage .
@yvettemaldonado3428
5 ай бұрын
He has mentality checked out and probably is having a secret affair by phone. Or just isn’t happy in relationship, and becomes abusive when he wasn’t before because he can’t just leave ..Separate for the 30 days and let him decide what he’s gonna do. Than u accept even though it hurts. I been there
@davinasquirrel7672
4 ай бұрын
Yes, agree with that - except that she should be the one to decide, not him. The problem with the second chances in abusive scenarios is that the abuser will often beg to come back, insist that they have changed, will never do it again, I've grown, yadda yadda. These are BS sales pitches to trap the victim again. Because little by little, he will revert to his old self. Plus, he has a new tool of control - that of "but I am trying to change, and you doing XYZ is stopping me". That one actually is called 'blame the victim for your behaviour', and every abuser ever, has that same mentality.
@caringforall4454
5 ай бұрын
My son has beautiful red hair, but growing up people will comment (positively or negatively). Since my kids were little I’ve told them that all red-heads are descended from Vikings- how cool is that!
@queenbee3647
5 ай бұрын
My daughter has had the mean comments too. We ALWAYS looked at it in a positive way. And its true! I prayed my baby would be a red headed girl. Her grandmother though calls it clown hair. Right to her face. And btw my mom is a redhead. And the kids at school KICK gingers on a certain day and the school doesnt stop it. Shes grown now and has grown men ask her the most vulgar questions about her hair color.
@loveinspired5898
5 ай бұрын
This makes me very scared for this woman. I really hope she can just get out of the marriage safely. Too many men end up doing something horrible to women, husbands like this end up snapping and kill their wives rather than deal with the shame of a divorce or dealing with their own problems because they're mentally unwell. I truly will be praying for this woman. Something about this one really resonated in me instilling a fear in me. She's worried about the marriage ending and losing the man she wanted to spend her life with, but she definitely needs to pay attention to what he's doing and realize it's more than just a bad partner being mean it's a dangerous escalation.
@relaxnaturesounds6588
5 ай бұрын
This reminds me so much of my confusion before being made aware by the therapist that my ex was autistic with high narcissistic traits. Neurotypical interventions don't work.
@Brittany138
5 ай бұрын
Awe Kelly ❤ when you popped on I got emotional 🥹 I loooooove this channel
@susanlee8023
Ай бұрын
Don’t wait. It’s already abuse. You don’t need for him to hit you before you call it quits. Strength and peace to you ❤❤❤❤❤
@mary_jane47
5 ай бұрын
Not contributing financially means divorce to me or am I crazy?
@lwscijunkie
5 ай бұрын
It would depend upon why he isn't contributing financially... I think...Is a formerly good provider legit sick or disabled? Did a husband/father get laid off or lose his job through no fault of his own? Is the guy actively looking for work....Or is he a guy who somehow can't keep a job and/or is an addict/alcoholic or gambling addict or spending what $ he does have on (fill in the blank)?
@COMPLICATION0710
5 ай бұрын
My boy John got that kickass intro dude. He’s a bad ass bro
@relaxnaturesounds6588
5 ай бұрын
And the children then have to see the father alone. Plus she would need support if working full time with three small children.
@sixxlee890
4 ай бұрын
Not necessarily, if the court decides that there are enough reasons that he is unsafe to, or he may need supervised visits.
@rosannarichardson7951
4 ай бұрын
He was already doing nothing
@maciw456
4 ай бұрын
This is SO MUCH MORE than an ultimatum! Wow- protect your kids and yourself and force the separation NOW! I’m her exact age and I understand how hard it would be to upend your life with 3 kids but she needs to do it ASAP.
@DirtyDuramax
5 ай бұрын
I actually would love to have eyes like that! I’ve seen lots of huskeys and Australian shepherds with eyes like that.
@Ktsjdu5xi6e86r9
5 ай бұрын
Thanks for sharing your story John. I knew there was some history there, I could just tell. Like recognizes like. You gave her great advice.
@ericacole7102
5 ай бұрын
She needs her own therapist to help her get her confidence back so she can move on. She will see her children grow up and be abuser or abused. That is why I left my ex husband. Also her children and she might suffer ptsd Also it might be a good idea, no a great idea to record his long rants while he keeps you hostage and the kids can hear. I wasn’t prepared and the judge didn’t believe me. .
@ICUpilot
Ай бұрын
“When you ---- I feel ---- because-----“ the end. Pause. Reflect them back then repeat the first statement
@universaltruth2025
5 ай бұрын
Yeah say she may not be able to come to the wedding because she drank too much. That will be the last you hear from her forever. She was probably simply anxious about being there given you all live near to each other and she had to travel a long way. Good on her for even going.
@trashmaam.8080
2 күн бұрын
My son has a speech impediment. He was a tender heart, introverted, mildly autistic, awkward little weirdo and i was so scared when he started school that he was going to be picked on just for being "a little weird" because kids are jerks... well, turns out my kid is the jerk. So we get to work on that now.
@elsa_nyc
5 ай бұрын
Take the kids and run. This is a terrifying situation. Save yourself and those children.
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