I told Ashens I liked Episode 1 when I got to chat with him briefly a few months ago. His eyes suddenly lost all focus and his hands began to tremble, followed by his face turning a more noticeable shade of red than Darth Maul's. Before I could react he violently grabbed me by the throat and strangled the life out of me. No one stopped him for they deemed his response fair. At least that's what happened in my mind's eye when I considered letting him know I liked it and wisely convinced me I perhaps shouldn't.
@TheLakabanzaichrg
2 жыл бұрын
You monster
@GetBentley
10 жыл бұрын
When you cut open the goo bag you had the perfect opportunity to say "And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!"
@thekingsman9773
9 жыл бұрын
I am calling my first child either (Bulbous Two-Legged Frog Bastard), (Big Iguana Thing)
@thekingsman9773
9 жыл бұрын
(Horrifying Devil Inflatable Cow), or (Boring Dinosaur from the Planet Boring)
@dmd8552
2 жыл бұрын
You posted this six years ago. Have any kids yet?
@vectro4284
2 жыл бұрын
@@dmd8552 🦗
@kimsleep4111
5 жыл бұрын
"Battle Bag" one of the pet names I have for my Ex-Mother In Law!
@paulherman5822
3 жыл бұрын
And what I call my ex-wife... 😂
@xXcsjr57Xx
10 жыл бұрын
I definitely had one of these when I was little... I remember the bottom left group on the back of the case. Some things were so much cooler when I was younger.
@Ninjamohawk
9 жыл бұрын
I worked at Toys R Us before and during this movie's release and you would not BELIEVE the amount of overpriced crap we had on the shelves. Anything left was on clearance in three months (suckers, these battle bags, the stupid dancing jar jar, among many many others). I think even if I'd loved the movie I'd have learned to hate it from Toys R Us alone.
@epicaza
10 жыл бұрын
I laughed so hard when you said "Trigger from only fools and horses". "Alright Dave?"
@ChefExcellence
10 жыл бұрын
Where did he find the "Noooo" without the music? Also, an excellent video as always.
@TheKogunEnjou
4 жыл бұрын
I had one of these as a kid! That exact bag actually, I still have the figures. The slime was a bit cooler back in 1999 before it got all hard and weird.
@Aleks-ep3sd
10 жыл бұрын
I actually really like the new Star Wars movies (I-III). Even more so than the older ones.
@ThePlasmacaster
10 жыл бұрын
@Ashens just wanted to say thank you for the fantastic set up *ashens reads out the creatures available in the bags*. GF "what's a Kah-doo?" ME "it drives up and down the road."
@n0isyturtle
10 жыл бұрын
Honestly, I remember NONE of these from Episode 1. None of them.
@EvilDoresh
10 жыл бұрын
That's because "Every single frame has so much going on, so many effects" (Paraphrased from one of George's yes-men)
@georgesiv2082
10 жыл бұрын
EvilDoresh it's so dense! , it was porptrayed like poetry so that they rime
@JanoyCresvaZero
10 жыл бұрын
I'm vomiting in stanzas... ...I don't even know what that means!
@katakis1
3 жыл бұрын
Opee Sea Creature is "there's always a bigger fish", and Kaadu is the horse thing Gungans ride on during the battle for Naboo.
@projectrallus
10 жыл бұрын
I've got the weird scalpel thing and some of those figures and I couldn't for the life of me figure out where they'd come from. Thanks, Ashen.
@MagikarpBeast
10 жыл бұрын
And i thought they smelled bad on the outside! Anyone???
@snoballuk
10 жыл бұрын
The problem there is that you're quoting a much better movie.
@GabeNewellDFTBA
8 жыл бұрын
It's an old comment sir, but it checks out.
@tomgriffiths2622
4 жыл бұрын
MagikarpBeast WOW just WOW
@godslaughter
3 жыл бұрын
"It's a bird but more of a dinosaur" Who's gonna let Ashens know that birds are dinosaurs. Well, looks like it'll have to be me.
@Avesfox
10 жыл бұрын
Oh look, a few opening scenes of Star Wars Episode VII... Ext. Space Lense flare from a nearby dwarfed star. There is an opening title and text crawl here but the lense flare consumes the screen and resumes to blind the audience. Text crawl doesnt matter because nobody can see it. Ext. Hoth / Abandoned Rebel Base Sun reflects off a vast landscape of ice and snow causing excessive amounts of lense flare and more blindness. We hear what sounds like the Millennium Falcon Falcon flying overhead. The camera tries to pan over to watch it land but lense flare lense flare blinding eye bleeding lense flare in SUPER HYPER REALISTIC 3D!
@NuclearFall404
10 жыл бұрын
You forgot: Explosions by Michael Bay.
@K4RN4GE911
10 жыл бұрын
[lens flare intensifies]
@RobitskiStudios
10 жыл бұрын
I found more of the script! Ext. Millennium Falcon Cockpit HAN SOLO: Chewie, we've got to outrun that Imperial Remnant battleship! CHEWIE: Raaaarwwrwarraarw! HAN SOLO looks out the COCKPIT WINDOWS, but can't see anything because there is so much lens flare. HAN SOLO: Ouch! My eyes! Ext. Space above a moon Suddenly we switch to a view of the MILLENNIUM FALCON just above a grey moon - well, I think it's grey but there's so much lens flare it could be white. Just add lots of lens flare.
@JanoyCresvaZero
10 жыл бұрын
I would rather see 2 hours of lens flare than hear about trade disputes for two fucking hours.
@TheDondecker
10 жыл бұрын
"Use them to create exciting adventures... just like in a different movie." I died laughing!
@ThePlayfarer
10 жыл бұрын
The funny thing is I would probably go crazy for something like this when I was a kid. Not because of Episode 1, but because WEIRD PLASTIC MONSTERS. I had a thing about collecting shit like that. Still have the box of horrors under my bed. xD
@HHog
8 жыл бұрын
That exasperated "oh fuck off" sigh after "Faa", that pretty much sums the whole thing up right there.
@RaptorZX3
10 жыл бұрын
When you read it too fast/wrong, it's "Battle Bags ooze with excrement!"
@thrainosaren5925
8 жыл бұрын
That bag opening reminded me of the eggs from alien, which makes me think a thing like this would be great if it were filled with alien figures.
@SubparPanda
10 жыл бұрын
Is that fish legit just called op sea killer? laughed my ass off at that one
@CybeargPlays
10 жыл бұрын
I don't get it... Why do they come in a bag of goo? What was the point of that?
@Anaverageguy41
10 жыл бұрын
Because goo was the thing in the early 2000's man did you never have one of those glow in the dark alien things. Also kids are stupid, they'll buy into anything, I know I did. (I had about 5 Alien egg things, all five spilled on the carpet, we had to get new carpet
@Ashurman666
10 жыл бұрын
Cause ooze is cool man.Except this ooze
@sapindalessamuel1626
10 жыл бұрын
Anaverageguy41 I miss the goo, man. Good times in the 'nAughties'.
@Anaverageguy41
10 жыл бұрын
SapindalesSamuel I don't, man my parents were pissed at me when I spilled the goo. You can still buy it, but I remember those adverts for it on like every channel, that made them seem badass but turns out they were shit, like a lot of noughties toys :p
@lucasthornton6794
10 жыл бұрын
Because it's a ~swamp~ wo00oAaah
@adambell1930
10 жыл бұрын
*cuts open bag* "And I thought they smelled bad... on the outside!"
@jackebel249
10 жыл бұрын
I was waiting for the "I thought they smelled better on the outside" joke.
@sporkafife
10 жыл бұрын
"Alright Dave" is the first thing I thought when I saw the fish called Trigger as well xD
@edenkeeping2298
9 жыл бұрын
Oh how i love "two legged frog bastard"
@evillttlimp
10 жыл бұрын
I have a feeling that all of these creatures were originally significantly less green
@Harlei3
10 жыл бұрын
So many videos, thank you Stuart.
@evansn79
8 жыл бұрын
I tell you what, i actually do want that frog bastard. It'd look great with an armored knight riding it ,with a lazer cannon. heavy metal style.
@TheLarryburns84
8 жыл бұрын
sounds like a Molly Hatchet or Manowar album cover
@kupo1705
10 жыл бұрын
I don't remember any of these creatures from the movie. Then again I don't remember anything from them.
@grfrjiglstan
10 жыл бұрын
Some of the fish were from the part where they get chased.
@driftercarbon
10 жыл бұрын
Then you are truly blessed, sir or madam. Then you are truly blessed.
@EvilDoresh
10 жыл бұрын
Come on, half of them appear for at least 4 seconds in total!
@midlifecrisi
10 жыл бұрын
A better question would be: Who would buy generic random creatures in an attempt to make exciting adventures from the Star Wars series? Who thinks "I could have Obi-Wan or Qui-Gon, but I think I'll need a generic lizard to finish off my set!"
@Strawberrycock309
10 жыл бұрын
I had all four of these bags. They weren't very good but i remember the ooze thing being a lot cooler 15 years ago.
@NightfallGemini
10 жыл бұрын
May the falumpaset be with you.
@burntreynolds1068
10 жыл бұрын
Oddly enough Trigger did play a bit-part in Episode IV as an Officer aboard the Deathstar! Blew my tiny mind as a kid.
@lynchlychfeld
10 жыл бұрын
I got one of these as a kid and actually liked it quite a bit as a kid.
@jadedflames
10 жыл бұрын
I love it when he reviews things I have sitting on the shelf nearby. ^_^
@DeckyStrikesBack
10 жыл бұрын
How long have you had them on the shelf? Why are they on a shelf? What else is on this shelf? Is it a shelf of tat? We need to talk - so many questions!
@jadedflames
10 жыл бұрын
Since... 1999? I guess. Or rather, they came with me the last time I moved. Where else would you put an old Fambaa and a gungan scalpel? Some old lego men, a darth vader helmet, and the Wonder Twins action figures. Oh, and a Borg coffee mug. And in conclusion, yeah.... pretty much. Heh. It's a good shelf.
@DeckyStrikesBack
10 жыл бұрын
Chandler Walpole Thank you for the reply Mr Walpole - that sir, THAT is a solid shelf.
@payno20
10 жыл бұрын
"like cutting open a bin bag with gooey shit in it".... Best and most accurate review ever..
@LuLzMrTom
10 жыл бұрын
Prepare for the incoming tide of "WHY WOULD YOU OPEN A 15 YEAR OLD COLLECTIBLE RAAAR RAAARRRR" comments
@GloomieGhost
10 жыл бұрын
It's not that they made a bad toy/collectible it's that they really wanted to capture the feel of the movie.
@DyslexicBasatrd
10 жыл бұрын
Why does Ashnes have so many anime and MLP fans? You'd think the MLP fans would have gone away after he insulted them all. Ah, well. Great video Ashens once again :)
@RossOriginals
10 жыл бұрын
He didn't actually insult them directly, he was just annoyed about all the junk he was being sent. I suspect Ashens really couldn't care less what cartoons people watch, so long as they don't try to make him watch it or keep sending him crappy merchandise of it.
@CurtisAlfeld
10 жыл бұрын
Because we don't really give a flying fuck. He was just pissed with all the shit we sent him, and doesn't like the show.
@bluefoxtv1566
10 жыл бұрын
Because his videos are funny and entertaining. And just because he does not like one thing i do does not change that.
@cameronputt2858
10 жыл бұрын
BlueFoxTV I myself am a Brony, but that doesn't affect how much Ashens I watch. And besides, the mystery bags are kind of crap anyway.
@HylianMadness
10 жыл бұрын
He didn't really insult Bronies. He was just insulting the blind bags; saying they're shit. Which they are. I like MLP, but god-damn, the toys are fucking awful! Shitty paint, shitty designs, more repaints than actual characters. They fucking suck.
@captainatt
10 жыл бұрын
I was waiting for a "I thought they smelt bad on the outside" joke through the whole video.
@superiodity
10 жыл бұрын
Didn't the majority of people like episode 1 when it first came out? Or am I just remembering incorrectly.
@colonelsanders1349
10 жыл бұрын
You are correct. It's only the die hard Star Wars fans who don't like the prequels the general public loved it
@EvilDoresh
10 жыл бұрын
I was like 11 back then. Of course did I like it. Then Episode 2 came out and I started to see the horrible truth about the prequels.
@AisukurimuYusukurimu
10 жыл бұрын
I liked it a great deal before I saw it.
@alegomanYTPs
10 жыл бұрын
hating prequels is basically like a meme, people are always following it because it's le funny XDDDDD
@EvilDoresh
10 жыл бұрын
A Lego Man And justified. It's not even like I'm a "hater" or anything. I watched Clone Wars, and it's absurd how much more those writers seemed to give a damn.
@upyoursdotcom
2 жыл бұрын
I like the Phantom Menace.
@BansheeNeet
10 жыл бұрын
The names of these creatures sound like titles of Aphex Twin songs.
@ArtypNk
10 жыл бұрын
Jesus, was it really 15 years already? Oh my god, time flies, at this rate I'm gonna be dead soon, oh no!!
@Pacmanghost
10 жыл бұрын
Honestly, if I had gotten this as a stocking stuffer back then I would have thought it was pretty cool.
@tom-alexanderwhyte1548
10 жыл бұрын
Might I point out that Groupers are real fish that look pretty much the same as the one on the box, but a bit more normal.
@danielreid8480
10 жыл бұрын
that only fools and horses reference had me rollin
@DiggyDwarf-wc2qj
3 жыл бұрын
That gooberfish could kill an entire sea
@owlsighs
10 жыл бұрын
For some reason I really want that anteater tick cow. Its so stupid and weird. It would look great on my shelf and would remind me to never take life too seriously, because even that tick cow made it into a movie and was adapted into a toy.
@booksmusicgodislife
10 жыл бұрын
OMG! I had these all the time as a kid!!! I would get one or two at least once a week! :D
@alexvince4576
6 жыл бұрын
I was shown episode 1 when I was a kid and I did enjoy it at the time
@Ohnonoki
10 жыл бұрын
I want bags meant for battle. Which reminds me of that war fought for a bucket. You think I'm kidding, and I'm not. There was a war fought over a bucket.
@RossOriginals
10 жыл бұрын
Was it the Holy Pail?
@HagenFlachmann
10 жыл бұрын
Good god! It even lasted for 12 years. That must have been one fine bucket.
@lolinion
10 жыл бұрын
So basically, silly looking dinosaur things with odd proportions and with no articulation what so ever in a bag of puke and snot. Kids will love it. Fun for minute(s).
@haveitboi999
10 жыл бұрын
i loved episode 1 its probably my favourite star wars
@haveitboi999
10 жыл бұрын
because it had more of a story and darth vader as a kid, likeable people and pod racing. it was the 1st one i saw. i also love jarjar
@OdaSwifteye
10 жыл бұрын
eddy friday How old are you? Star Wars episode one didn't have much of a story. In fact for how cluttered it is nothing really happened. The origin of Darth Vader pales in comparison to how the character played out in the original movies having a real story arc and everything. The characters lacked Characterization as they were busy with the plot and action and never had down time where they did human things and acted like normal people. The Pod Race was well done (but very unnecessary for the story as it didn't help the plot by much, was a huge tiring distraction, and hasn't been heard from again as the pod race only existed to sell you pod race games and pod race toys rather than expand the Star Wars universe or even the Tatoonie culture) and you liking Jar Jar means that as a marketing tool Jar Jar wasn't a complete failure.
@Hammer_Ent
10 жыл бұрын
So happy with the only fools and horses reference :)
@arbitor365
10 жыл бұрын
i actually got one of these as a kid. i always had that weird stick thing and forgot where it came from
@42PalaceOfWisdom42
10 жыл бұрын
4:08 I thought they smell bad on the outside!
@realdieperdors
7 жыл бұрын
Ashens just helped a fabric bag give birth to 4 plastic ripoff abominations!
@Akanint
10 жыл бұрын
I'm pretty sure Dennis Nedry didn't even make it halfway through Jurassic Park.
@palegamer9156
10 жыл бұрын
Yay you brought back the old intro !
@Gh0stClown
10 жыл бұрын
I was slightly hoping he'd try to burn the goo just to see what would happen.
@zdaviation
10 жыл бұрын
Angel Fish vs Trigger: let battle bagging commence.
@abeherbert6603
10 жыл бұрын
What was this company thinking? Well, it appears many Star Wars fans were disappointed with this prequel, what could we do to make things better? Oh yes, release a series of toys featuring random alien creatures that were on-screen for about 3 seconds!
@vectro4284
2 жыл бұрын
If only he know how bad the sequels were going to be, the prequels suddenly don’t sound so bad anymore.
@Hadam10Rose
10 жыл бұрын
Well the 'Jedi Knife' was just the weapon that came with the Jar Jar figure
@jayanthony7096
10 жыл бұрын
"Frog bastard" haha I'm using that as insult from now on..
@vjpearce
10 жыл бұрын
I think the ooze stained all the creatures green, especially when you compare them to the back of the pack.
@mrnaughtycat
10 жыл бұрын
I remember the goosebumps bags like these could never clean the green gunk of the figures
@erikthepirate8068
4 жыл бұрын
Looks like we have the Beasts of Star Wars!
@ccggenius
3 жыл бұрын
Honestly, this'd be a pretty neat gimmick if the figures were of something people gave a shit about. I think the foaming blocks were definitely an upgrade though, far less cleanup. Like, I would NOT feel comfortable washing that goop down the drain.
@gestaposantaclaus
3 жыл бұрын
I just wanted the droid tanks as a kid.
@JesuszillaS
10 жыл бұрын
That first thing you pulled out I think actually IS in scale with the figures, at least if The Phantom Menace PC game is anything to go by. How would I know this? Because I played the hell out of that game because it was like Grand Theft Auto III before Grand Theft Auto III.
@ChryI
10 жыл бұрын
Haha OP Sea Killer, thats one funny pun.
@drakovergil6593
10 жыл бұрын
I guess all those years the green chemicals leached into the toys. XD
@andgalactus1
10 жыл бұрын
My life is oozing falumpaset.
@abn4646
7 жыл бұрын
Okay, apologies for bringing this up, but Shaak was the name of one of the Jedi. Pretty sure they just made most of these up.
@drspazphd
10 жыл бұрын
Shouldn't have been eating when I started watching this.
@Cynical_Cynic
10 жыл бұрын
When you where cutting the bag I thought you were going to say "And I thought they smelt bad on the outside."
@lionbybirth
10 жыл бұрын
You really hit the nail on the head with that lens flare comment!
@jamesmaclintock3522
10 жыл бұрын
'Trigger.. Alright Dave' hahahaha
@artdcora
9 жыл бұрын
I think I got one of the sea creature ones back in the day.
@ximachimpx
10 жыл бұрын
i remember this thing from when i was really young
@chancep4050
7 жыл бұрын
Oh I had one of those as a kid!
@hentosama
10 жыл бұрын
all these creatures sure make you think about star wars!
@00ABBITT00
10 жыл бұрын
Remember when StarWars toys were neat? Man...I was like 10.
@RetroRepair
10 жыл бұрын
Only one hundred and eighty pees? How can we endure it in four thousand pees now? Silly Joorge Lookas.
@Connelly90
10 жыл бұрын
I'm sorry, but "Falumpaset" is now my new favourite word!
@driftercarbon
10 жыл бұрын
It's not a total loss. You could always use the tool they've included to stab out your eyes the next time Episode One comes on. Won't likely help much with your ears, though.
@TheDUMYPLUGG
9 жыл бұрын
It nuts what time has done to that green stuff cuz when i first had it it was way cooler.
@plasticmonk
10 жыл бұрын
oddly enough..I now want to go buy a slurpee from seeing that goo...LOL
@nuclearcosmos23
6 жыл бұрын
we need more starwars creature toys these are gorgeous compared to hasbro now
@simonatford1
10 жыл бұрын
SOE also stands Special Operations Executive. These were the very brave men and women who went behind enemy lines in WWII and answered directly to Churchill. Not funny but hopefully interesting.
@SniperWalrus
10 жыл бұрын
Still better than any of the new trilogy.
@dedpxl
10 жыл бұрын
lol I was looking at the psn store in another tab and I was looking at the "Sony Online Entertainment" category and thinking about it, then I switched to this tab and Ashen's makes a reference to SOE. (around 1:40)
@Meowskivich
10 жыл бұрын
I've had a few of those battle bags, good times.
@EvilDoresh
10 жыл бұрын
15 years ago? Now I feel old.
@AceD500
10 жыл бұрын
May the blind bag be with you...always :)
@adamp5529
10 жыл бұрын
I happen to love star wars
@michaelbond220
10 жыл бұрын
reminds me of when the lama thing died in empire when he got cut open
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