Great advice. I "faded" over 2 years ago and there was an underlying tension in the house because of it and my wife knew some of the reasons for it. My wife is very intelligent and street smart, but I never thought she would even think about leaving. She has been in since she was about 10 (she's 44 now) and all her friends and some family are witnesses. We got into an argument a few weeks ago and told her I don't want our kids to be witnesses. Long story short--- she herself had doubts and she's no longer attending. She even missed the CO's visit. Her tipping point was that she can't reconcile all the changes the organization has made over the years. I told her about the WT's NGO status also. She didn't believe and then she saw it for herself. She felt very conflicted. She almost went to the meeting on Sunday because the elders wanted to meet with her. I told her it was her choice, but I shared scriptures to reaffirm her doubts. I told her to read all of Proverbs 4 and she concluded that had nothing to do with prophecy. I also shared Deut 18:20-22( I got that one from one of your videos-- thanks) and she read it and she was floored. She knew that was the Org. I don't really believe in the Bible any more, but that was a great one to use for JWs. I'm hoping she continues down this track. Sorry for the long story. Thanks!!! P.S. She didn't meet with the elders.
@guillermovilla9517
7 жыл бұрын
Update--- My wife threw out all her Watchtowers and books. She even threw out some Of the stuff I was hanging on to. It wasn't anything I was emotionally attached to, but just because they were so ridiculous-- like the reasoning book and Live Forver book. I never thought this would happen. I'm thrilled, but my daughter, 12, is a little bummed out because she won't have her Kingdom Hall friends anymore.
@guillermovilla9517
7 жыл бұрын
Wotiknow Now that's hilarious! I'm glad my short comment helped. It's a tough road. I hope your wife will fully come out.
@guillermovilla9517
7 жыл бұрын
Wotiknow Now Dude, you're crazy. I love it. Now that you're out, you can say whatever the hell you want without worrying you're going to "stumble" someone. That's great news about your mom. There is hope for all!! Those are the kind of experiences I like to hear, not the contrived Watchtower bullshit (you can say that too)😂
@dantoinettetaylor1663
6 жыл бұрын
GuillermoVilla Congratulations!
@testaccount1060
3 жыл бұрын
Proverbs 4?
@HermannBockOnline
10 жыл бұрын
Hi John, I've never wrote to you before, but here and on the Jehovah's-Witness.net site, I've been a fan and read all your entries. I woke up from the brainwashing back in 2008 and, like you, had to leave. Sadly, in my case, I was the only family member who woke up. I'm really happy that your wife joined you. This all reminds me of something I told my son before leaving: Do you wanna know the real truth, or at least get closer to it? Listen to BOTH sides of the story...that's the ONLY way, and that's what the majority of JWs are afraid of doing. I was! But a point came when I gave myself permission to look at both sides, like it's done I court.... after that, waking up was a swift process! Again, thanks for sharing!
@sleepyjean4275
6 жыл бұрын
When one is reared from the cradle to believe in God, Jehovah , you never question that belief. It becomes fact. Thanks John I just stumbled on your channel. I’m so glad you stumbled me.
@joelmartin5887
10 жыл бұрын
Always great to listen to you! You are never angry but very direct and honest and quite comforting in your approach.
@dianacryder7523
9 жыл бұрын
It's so comforting to listen to you. You seem level headed, logical, and kind. I've subscribed so that when I feel alone, because I AM alone, I can find your videos and, hopefully, be comforted. Leaving Jehovah's Witnesses is the hardest thing I've ever had to do and that includes leaving my marriage and my children.
@karenmoody2763
Жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry for your pain ,maybe volunteer your time at soup kitchens or animal shelters ,meet new people
@katesheppard7813
10 жыл бұрын
You are a very kind and generous couple to be so open in sharing your experiences to help others.
@T120RT
6 жыл бұрын
Thanks for sharing, Lloyd. It is a template for many in the leaving process.
@sleepyjean4275
6 жыл бұрын
You are doing a a very very good thing , in a way you are bringing light where there was darkness . Keep on keeping on.
@Alvanley66
10 жыл бұрын
Thanks, John for sharing this part of your story. (Love that dog!!)
@pauljermyn5909
6 жыл бұрын
I was brought up as a jw, my waking up happened as a teen and was quite simple, I started seriously studying ancient world history, that pretty much kills religion.
@tibbzscrum
7 жыл бұрын
independent thinking. its the only way out
@SunshineBlueSkies18
10 жыл бұрын
I was able to gradually share facts about the deception of the WT with my husband, who now sees them for what they are. (false prophets). Even got him to read Ray Franz book. Happy to say we are still together. Between the both of us we had almost 70 years in that organization. One day we will tell our story. Always enjoy your videos.
@SkySpiral8
5 жыл бұрын
The way I was able to question my beliefs guilt-free was to reason "If God is Truth, he gave me a brain to seek truth. By questioning things I'm seeking truth and thus seeking God."
@miniskirt2395
10 жыл бұрын
Lovely video. Pleased you both 'kept it together'. Take care. x
@alans.wendelschafer6588
3 жыл бұрын
This is the video I needed! This is my situation exactly!
@alexukback
8 жыл бұрын
Hey Loyed, Today I went undercover so to speak in the kingdom hall I really want to get my hands on the old copys for the watchtower and awake. Its seems now they keep them under lock and key and when I started to take picture of the articles, I was kind of told thats not allowed and they are out dated material. Huh well just want to know how you got yours ? any advice :) Alexukback
@darlenesmith1432
10 жыл бұрын
Love Bessie!!! You are indeed a fortunate guy.I also am lucky I woke up first then every day I would show him what I had found researching and when I found what the name Jehovah really meant that was it for him.Great video BLESSINGS
@dantoinettetaylor1663
6 жыл бұрын
Darlene Smith what does the name Jehovah really means and where can we find this info?
@ryanfield3747
6 жыл бұрын
A rule of thumb I've told my buddies about waking up is. When you finally leave how ever many years you were in it will take that many years to totally deprogram entirely. Even then there may very well still be traces that linger.
@muzchan2354
8 жыл бұрын
I did a lot of research on the watchtower yet and I really agree on the fact that the Jehovah's witnesses - those I know, do not know as much as I do. They are pretty much only into the recently released stuff. If you ask them about something released back then they seem like having to check on it first, to recall their memories. It seems like they have a short memory. Maybe because the watchtower trained them to have just to make sure they always are most excited about the new released stuff. Thank you for the video. I learned that I shouldn't try to pull them out of their cult but more of assisting them to find out of their cult. Reminded me of the story of the abandoned animal child who walks around asking other animals looking for what kind of animal it really is.
@nemeanlion2460
7 жыл бұрын
Dr. Steven Novella (Skeptic's Guide to the Universe) mentioned, and I'm paraphrasing, that he 'was amazed that someone that comes to reason and logic when it's comfortable for them to stay with a belief'. Those they wake up can live a 'comfortable life' if you keep your head down and "tow-the-line". But to overcome that is amazing, when we have so much to lose like in your case, part of your family.
@barbarahedges1791
8 жыл бұрын
paused, to say what a beautiful dog.
@djembemama01
10 жыл бұрын
Great video, thank you for sharing! So happy for you both! Cute dog too :)
@robertsandberg2246
4 жыл бұрын
I earlier mentioned that you should show your dog on a video. Bessie is cute! 🐶 My dog is named "Bethany" but I call her "Beth" for short. Once someone misheard me when she asked her name and thought it was "Bess." Just thought I would share that.😊
@picklechuggyzachyx6313
5 жыл бұрын
Can you help us and show us a physical copy of your list to her?
@dianacryder7523
9 жыл бұрын
"Questions from viewers"...Is that like a play on, "Questions from Readers" in the Watchtower, lol?
@deadthrills7302
9 жыл бұрын
I am deeply touched by your videos. Thank you so much. I am so disappointed in this so called "organization". I feel like i don't know what to believe in now. Oh well, I just hope my fiancée wakes up soon.
@AveryOrchid
10 жыл бұрын
I am thankful you and your wife are free of the mind control. My husband is still under the watchtower's spell. Hopefully, he will wake up soon.
@Sittingstraight12
10 жыл бұрын
Avery, you and I are in the same position ! It's so hard. Are you even able to talk freely to hubby about things? I'm not! I try to say things here and there to not cause a huge fight!!
@AveryOrchid
10 жыл бұрын
Yes, it is very hard. I have had to take a break from talking to him lately. He is extra zealous because we are getting ready for the international convention this summer. I will start up again after that. You can private message me if you want:)
@Sittingstraight12
10 жыл бұрын
How? Not sure on google plus, my private email is sittingstraight@yahoo.com, I would LOVE to talk to you chicka!
@AveryOrchid
10 жыл бұрын
Thx Lightfly. It is nice to get encoragement:)
@debbiechez4495
10 жыл бұрын
avery orchid, how is it going with your spouse? I have been working on mine for 9 moths along with all three of his grown kids and nothing. I wont be staying for much longer hopefully you are fairing better
@suzannemenuet947
6 жыл бұрын
I never was baptized, just a casual student. See I love in a nursing home and there's a few that faithfully come up here, so every now and then they come bring me magazines even though I quit studying. I was really into it in the beginning, but when I realized that I'm gay, (I came out late), I could no longer pretend to agree with everything. Idk how it is everywhere else, but down here they take a hard stance against homosexuality. I mean, every time we studied, it came up. They didn't know about me but it was always coming up. Enough was enough finally. I still never tell them, but I have a giant rainbow flag on my wall that they eye suspiciously when they stop by. Thanks for your videos. Sorry for the novel and excuse my atrocious punctuation.
@jameshigginbottom632
6 жыл бұрын
My wife is a JW, I’m not. We have been married for 16 years. Even though she was going to the hall when we were married, she conveniently says she was not a true JW. Now if I bring up anything anti JW she becomes very angry, and makes my life very difficult.
@zeeborutherford147
10 жыл бұрын
Great vid John - I agree 100% with the bit about witnesses not knowing their own beliefs. My wife is Russian and also lacks the back history of WT. There are times when I'm telling her what she should be believing or what her WT response should be. Also the strangest this i have come across is we can discuss a subject and i can freely say what i believe (after all my beliefs are mine).. When i ask her she says "Oh i need to reserch". I might ne a synic but this is translated to mean "I don't have my own beliefs I will need to check what WT says I should believe". Sadly she is so deep in WT that i don't think she will wake. I could write a long long post about one incident but i will spare you all. To summarise if the GB said that God was a toad from another dimension and an expert guitar player, she would believe it. Without question, reason or proof. Andy any proof or reason i bring (eg UN letter) is disregarded as a fake by the evil apostates. I just don't understand why she even married me when she is so enthralled by WT.
@JemyjoanBraidsBeauty
5 жыл бұрын
She married you more because there are shortages of men in the religion
@jamieangel3766
8 жыл бұрын
love this dog, looks like mine!
@jeremyjbaker1
6 жыл бұрын
You are a strong man.
@stasacab
6 жыл бұрын
My dear spouse also woke up from being married with me.
@jennareed1638
7 жыл бұрын
I am desperate to help my mother, who is in her late seventies, wake up. How could I possibly get her to read anything (from her shunned daughter) when Jehovah is always watching?
@lancemilliken9078
5 жыл бұрын
And the greatest irony of that statement is that Jehovah does not even exist. An entire culture of people have spent their lives in total surrender and submission to a bunch of stories that are a mix of fiction and comic book like fantasy. It's honestly one of the greatest cons in the last couple of hundred years
@jamesmcginn8874
4 жыл бұрын
its a way of life to the older gen.--the repeated brainwashing by Watchtower is hard to change--Good Luck with your Mother .
@elguapo221
3 жыл бұрын
At that point I think it's better to let her keep believing otherwise she might die of shock that her entire life was wasted because of that organization. Honestly idk if that is true or not but thinking back at the elderly ladies in my hall they are the ones who drank the juice the most
@teknogran
10 жыл бұрын
Thank you once again love you guys (hugs) to Jane x
@hardwhite6318
8 жыл бұрын
they really messed a lot of our heads up
@kynancecove
7 жыл бұрын
I Loved my Dad & even though I was a disappointment I was I am yet alive we faught like cat &dog but I so miss that Lump of alpha male and his black & white specticles but his Heart was "DO things for the right Reasons"which is amoto Iv'e lived by and he taught me that & I will never forget that man because he left that with me rather than any doctrine from JWs.. dly Iv'e recently said goodbye to my Dad as he had passed away Iv'e been anX for near 3 decades I am terrified because I don't want to lose my Mum but but even though I love the Bro's iv'e seen too much stuff i'm not happy with. I'd be living a lie which is very sad although I 100% believe in GOD and as a very disabled person I hope Iv''e helped others to become a believer 25years now as Iv'e dedicated myself to share an event that happened to both my Former very very very bad associate of mine & a colleague & I in 1987 I am Not religious although I am researchingwell started to research again it's been very hard as Iv'e forgot shedloads
@tamidickerson5882
10 жыл бұрын
I am very fortunate that my husband was never a JW to begin with (I married him during the first time I was df'd).; but my heart has always gone out to those who weren't fortunate enough to keep their marriages after waking up. Hopefully your experience can give "waker-uppers" some idea of how to broach the issue with their "still-asleepers".
@dianacryder7523
9 жыл бұрын
Well, hello John. Yes. That's the question. How do you leave with your family intact?
@RrenKyle_
9 жыл бұрын
I'm afraid you don't. Considering that families are taught to 'treat the disfellowed' as if they were dead were anything to go by. Best you can do is find a support group or contact non-witness relatives. I'm still a witness (won't be in the future), and I've been mentally preparing myself for the fallout.
@dianacryder7523
9 жыл бұрын
Roxanne Bautista I technically am, too, but no longer share the beliefs. I'm now more anti-theist. Leaving is rough, the hardest thing ever and that includes the deaths of my parents. I don't think there's any way to mentally prepare if, like me, everyone you knew were witnesses. I lost everyone, husband, children, best friend. It sucks. I wish you well in starting over.
@peterbartley9777
8 жыл бұрын
Good explanation. Unfortunately this is not my experience. My wife will not listen to anything negative about the Society. All negative information is deemed by her to be 'apostate'. She will not talk to our d/f daughter and will never do so again. If her 'spiritual health' is threatened by negative talk, she will leave the household. So a gag has been put on this subject. There is no hope in this household on this matter. This society is totally corruptive.
@georgeorwell1595
6 жыл бұрын
Same here, can't seem to get reason to wake her. She is very intelligent, I am 100% sure that if she takes the time to hear the other side of the arguments she will wake up but she is doing exactly what your wife is doing. Even if I'm discussing other things and she relates it to 'negative talk' she finds me insinuating and she leaves. Very painful
@michaelhines3351
5 жыл бұрын
Lost & Foundn
@peterbartley9777
6 жыл бұрын
Regrettably my wife will never 'wake up' to this insidious cult. Any attempts to approach subjects for discussion are forbidden by her religion, and will be seen as a threat to her 'spirituality, and therefore justification for separation.
@RandomPerson-js3rc
6 жыл бұрын
The organization needs to realize that their founder started a bible study group and that is still all they are because they are constantly changing their ideas. So their TRUTH...., keeps changing. Hmm. I remember when my ex husband left before me during our marriage which by the way ended for other reasons, he would state his thoughts and at first I reacted like how could he but I realized I was disappointed because I was loosing my partner in faith. But the things he said actually stuck and encouraged my own questioning on other things. I wish I was more helpful to him then but I did eventually just listen and let him get things out. I understand and have more sympathy toward him now. Our union of course ended for other reasons like I said. Patience and love is paramount if keeping a relationship going because you love someone despite belief differences. There will always be different opinions in relationships anyway. So I guess it depends on the relationship.
@olmeckrav
9 жыл бұрын
Thank you
@5110damen
10 жыл бұрын
You are fortunate indeed to have a wife who has an open mind, when it comes to my wife I can only quote Rodney Dangerfield "Take My Wife, Please!".
@DemstarAus
6 жыл бұрын
Totally off topic... have you learned or do you want to learn any of the local language, and how are the locals in regards to you as a "foreigner". What cultural things have you noticed that are different to life in the UK?
@hardwhite6318
8 жыл бұрын
John u have probably seen this to why is it that when we almost all of that leave the key organization that we don't trust organized religion ever again
@spacie_stacie1428
7 жыл бұрын
Did you know that the Flying Spaghetti Monster(formed in 2005) is growing faster then the JW in fact they are larger! they are already at 10 million followers! just saying.... hahahaha
@lucillehills4012
6 жыл бұрын
Can you do a video about what they do with the millions they collect from all over the world, and best why they got ban from Russia. Please those will be a hit. Thanks
@VelvetYoung
8 жыл бұрын
I would like to have as much help as possible getting the information out there about how badly the Watchtower society slaughtered the Word of God. What is strange is when you are a J.W you don't see what is right in front of you. They changed the entire bible. Compare it to the King James bible...2 pet 2 :16 " ...in which are some things hard to understand, which untaught and unstable people twist to their own destruction, as they do the rest of the Scriptures." also Rev 22 : 16-19 Thank you so much!
@yshmaellindawan689
10 жыл бұрын
Wow I hope I can also do this same thing to my Mother also. :') .your Fb friend
@nemeanlion2460
7 жыл бұрын
Hi Bessy! :)
@beanabooboo1
10 жыл бұрын
I would assume your wife heard many times that she left because you did......she may feel like if she says you woke her...then they would think they were right!
@johnmiller5994
6 жыл бұрын
John, God bless you. I dont know what I am because I dislike to say the least religious institutions. I read the Bible, Old and new testament and I believe it. I belive im a sinner and Jesus is the only way I can be reconciled with God. I don't believe that it involves just a sinners prayer and im good but, a daily walk and I do believe you can loose your salvation. I believe in my heart your a good person. Im going to pray that God will speak to you. I really believe that the Lord Jesus is grieved to what the chuch has become. I have decided to just read my Bible, pray and trust God will show me everthing I need to know. I have done my best to erase the doctrines of men and Just concentrate on building my own personal relationship with God. I really know in my heart the religious institutions have turned your stomach toward God. I know this for sure if you are willing to drop all your resentment toward God, people, institutions and are really ready to follow God if he is real. If you pray honestly in your heart, God will make himself known to you. If you are ready to give up all your ideas and come to God in humility, he will reveal himself to you. The chuch now..no matter what denomination is in shambles. The only thing that God truly cares about is a relationship with the individual. I love you..and no im not gay..lol. I will pray God reveals himself to you. You are a smart guy and I know God can use you greatly.
@roslynmclean1714
6 жыл бұрын
GLAD YOU WOKE UP TO THAT, BUT WHAT YOU HAVE GONE TO MAKES YOU JUST AS LOST AND YOUR WIFE. HOPE YOU WILL FIND REAL TRUTH.
@TheEABProductions
6 жыл бұрын
Roslyn McLean Out of curiosity: What is this real truth, that you speak about.
@roslynmclean1714
6 жыл бұрын
YOU HAVE BECOME JUST AS BAD FOR HUMANITY AS THOSE WHO YOU ARE CONDEMNING EVEN THOUGH YOU THINK YOU HAVE A BETTER HEART. SINCERE PEOPLE CAN HURT PEOPLE AND LEAD THEM TO DESTRUCTION. I DO NOT QUESTION YOUR HEART.
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