Once I read the board I knew they wouldn't be able to remember living
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
I barely remembered my name
@sia---1123
Ай бұрын
i thought they used they/them?
@DistortedMemories555
Ай бұрын
Their name is FISH. _OBVIOUSLY_ they're not in the gender binary!
@chelsjones
Ай бұрын
the way jasper LIED to make sure he was enlisted too. he was too young but he just wanted to fight to keep slaves soooo bad 😭😭😭
@1WEareBUFO1
Ай бұрын
Jasper is cancelled
@serenastarz28
25 күн бұрын
Oh, was that what the war is? 👀🫠 my bad I like never paid attention during social studies class. I hated that class.😅
@chelsjones
25 күн бұрын
@@serenastarz28 this is so funny to me because i’m australian. you hated social studies so much that me, someone from across the world, knows more about one of the biggest events in your countries history than you do wkfjekdkdj now THATS dedication
@heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy924
20 күн бұрын
@serenastarz28 that's like.. one of the biggest event of your country?? That's like if I (Swiss person) didn't know who the fcking Savoyards were??
@worm2976
23 сағат бұрын
Who _were_ the Savoyards? I mean I could google it, but it's funnier if you answered I'll trade u a little history fact from my country for it@@heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy924
@literalydying8163
Ай бұрын
"I know that canonically Edward is hot, but I just can't imagine him that way" love you for that
@ladyteddi
2 ай бұрын
i was taking a drink of water when you said you think vampires taste like Clorox wipes, and that ended probably how you expected it to
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
…did you wipe it up…with a…clorox wipe…
@doeknows
Ай бұрын
SAME
@aaargh4761
2 ай бұрын
Damn guys Bella was reading Wuthering Heights the whole time?!?!?! No way!! I couldn’t tell. At all. 😑
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@aaargh4761Wuthering Heights? Really? I would have never guessed!
@henotic.essence
7 күн бұрын
WUTHERING HEIGHTS?????? 😅😂
@Fools3rrand
2 ай бұрын
I'm a 1/4 of the way in and I'm preparing a eulogy for your liver as I type this.
@Fools3rrand
2 ай бұрын
Halfway through now, modifying the liver eulogy to just be your eulogy. Rest in rip o7
@Fools3rrand
2 ай бұрын
3/4s including the book in it too. RIP Book.
@Fools3rrand
2 ай бұрын
Aaand it's over. We made it through 1/3 of the book before getting sloshed but we got a couple rants out of Wuthering Heights out of it! And parent commentary on your substandard embodiment of your newfound vampire role! So it's not all bad, really.
@ArianneBaer
2 ай бұрын
"You cant kill yourself youre a vampire!" Omg i love your dad for that. He should join you for the next installment! 😂
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@ArianneBaer HAHHAA, I think I’d have an easier time pulling out all of his teeth
@msjoshhutcherson181
2 ай бұрын
I just want you to know this video made it into my twilight groupchat
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
@@msjoshhutcherson181 please share the general consensus
@msjoshhutcherson181
Ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted hi I am back with an update I am happy to report I got two lmaooo’s and one repost on their IG story 🫡
@dani_drawzz
Ай бұрын
sharing is caring
@GarciaKrystal
2 ай бұрын
8:06 girl she can’t think either 😭 that’s probably why Edward couldn’t read her mind
@Mimikkki
Ай бұрын
LMAO
@sophiag9539
Ай бұрын
To quote my cousin from when we watched Twilight for the first time, “No duh Edward can’t read Bella’s mind, she DOESNT HAVE ONE”😂
@fanny9905
20 күн бұрын
dude... I loooooove your comment !
@user-is7xs1mr9y
5 күн бұрын
"No thoughts, head empty".
@tehrealcoralsnek7044
Ай бұрын
Vampirism as metaphor for student loans is actually a piping take and I am simmering on it a lil. Really turning that one over again a couple times
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@tehrealcoralsnek7044 I’ll make a 20 minute drunk video essay about it, don’t you worry
@tehrealcoralsnek7044
Ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted THANK GOD
@mcedwards
2 ай бұрын
"Are you toasted, little guy?" 😂 yes
@doeknows
Ай бұрын
"What do vampires taste like? I'm thinking they sort of just taste like a Clorox wipe" THE WAY I SPAT MY DRINK
@hannahstrashcan
Ай бұрын
You: Bella will have the coldest take about Wuthering Heights probably Bella: I don’t think Heathcliff did anything wrong 🤷♀️
@booknerdme7946
2 ай бұрын
this is the first time i've ever seen a drunk person and i'd just like to personally thank you for the experience
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
@@booknerdme7946 I’m honored to be your first 🙏
@seineevee
Ай бұрын
Oh my god same
@chromesthesia
Ай бұрын
I imagine the Cullen house is full of *squeak screech* marble on marble sounds.
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@chromesthesia imagine what they’d sound like if they ever high fived
@arisymphony
Ай бұрын
they seem like the kind of people to wear shoes inside
@msf2399
Ай бұрын
I think they mean because of how by the end of the series it’s basically confirmed that they get freaky with eachother all the time because this series is fucking weird like that. There is a *reason* that (minus Edward) the Cullens are 1/2 guys & 1/2 girls. They are all paired off, and they have used every single surface in that house, zero question.
@chromesthesia
Ай бұрын
@@msf2399 poor Edward is playing piano loudly and blasting music to drown it all out
@blueberrybabe4192
Ай бұрын
@@chromesthesiahe wanted to be included at that point cause he wasn’t going to continue suffering from their noises, he was going to make his own
@RedBanana_
Ай бұрын
The way that when you said ‘second chapter’ I just had to sit there for a minute because, *omg,* no way all of the previous stuff happened over the span of 1 chapter..
@MegaDummeNuss
Ай бұрын
Dunno if thats true, but some content craetor I saw mentioned that the entire plot of the twilight saga takes place in the span of TWO YEARS. And of these two years, a good chunk (like 3 months) was broken up Bellas 'staring out the window'-moment. :D
@vanilla_cream5198
2 ай бұрын
I wish I was able to drink when reading twilight
@F4IRY305
2 ай бұрын
Same
@comicsanslover
Ай бұрын
why can’t you? scared ur gonna accidentally get alcohol poisoning or smt 😭😭😭
@beomgyuzvr
Ай бұрын
@@comicsanslover maybe they arent old enough/ werent old enough (if they already read it)
@comicsanslover
Ай бұрын
@@beomgyuzvr ohhh i always forget that
@AGoofyJester
Ай бұрын
@@comicsansloverlol
@Bec2
2 ай бұрын
Your first drink reaction was my own reaction 😂
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
It tasted strangely like pickles
@lady_caiti
Ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wantedIT ABSOLUTELY DOES but in a BAD WAY
@DeificNines
Ай бұрын
"Here I am, halfway through a book series that I think might be killing me emotionally, and then I thought *what if this could also be killing me physically*?" 😓
@sstjohn96
2 ай бұрын
my OTP is Bella getting therapy
@-Galaxy-2695
Ай бұрын
There is a very specific type of person needed to get this joke… i am that type of person
I did a drinking game with my friends while watching Twilight, everytime someone cringed or laughed or on screen someone (Edward) was creepy we took a shot. We were already drunk 20 minutes into the movie. It was great
@fallen_vague28
Ай бұрын
I'm guessing the scene when in class Edward had a visceral reaction to Bella's scent earned y'all like half a bottle 😂
@sillygoofy1893
Ай бұрын
the way i was already crying with laughter just with you just reading the board. i know very well what happens with jasper and i’m still scared for you😭
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@sillygoofy1893WHY WOULD SHE WRITE THAT BACKSTORY FOR HIM????
@sillygoofy1893
Ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted i have no idea😭😭 the worst part is he’s proud of it too when he brings it up, both in the book and the movie. like not only did she write that backstory for him but then she tried to make it a good thing??? it rlly threw me off the first time i read the book😭💀
@KayGreylai
Ай бұрын
@sillygoofy1893 hi I'm not American but I am aware of the history of the American civil war. That being said I don't quite understand why people have such a strong reaction to this backstory, could you explain how you see it and feel about it? Just curious as someone who doesn't have a connection to that history. I hope you understand I'd really like to know how you guys think about it :)
@El1sL1n
Ай бұрын
@@KayGreylai The confederates are pretty much seen as the bad guys in the civil war. With, y'know, fighting for the right to have slaves. I'm from America and pretty much everyone who isn't a white supremasist agrees that the confederates were really terrible people, and associating with them is not a good thing to do! It would be along the same lines of him being a Nazi soldier, with how terrible both sides were. Obviously that's just my understanding of it, so I might be off or missing a lot.
@yemmie112
Ай бұрын
@KayGreylai the American civil war was fought bc the confederate wanted to keep owing slaves so it's a shocking choice of backstory for a character you're meant to like
@_arsun__
2 ай бұрын
« You can’t kill urself you’re a vampire are you even in character? » your mom is so funny ToT
@suri6352
2 ай бұрын
Ripping out the pages is so real. Wish I had a physical copy, because reading it digitally was dangerous
@knptwo99
Ай бұрын
"Canonically, what do vampires taste like? I imagine they taste like a clorox wipe" *sent* me
@shipsndip1956
2 ай бұрын
I’m begging you, BEGGING YOU please do this for all the rest of the books, even the first two, please!! This is so amazing and funny
@TiKerouac
Ай бұрын
Bella, we read Wuthering Heights in middle school, move up the ladder. Besides there is only so long you can simp for a possessive man who treats kids like crap because he can’t get over being rejected by his childhood crush . . . Oooooh.
@tvEverett
2 ай бұрын
i have been saying bella can't read for YEARS
@AmIALesbianOrJustBi
2 ай бұрын
I tried watching the twilight movies with a few friends and my partner but we just read Hannibal fanfiction the whole time
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
Interesting combo? How did you think to mix the two together?
@AmIALesbianOrJustBi
2 ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted I honestly do not know one second we were watching twilight the next I was reading Paragon out loud well whatever cult thing happens in the second movie but it might’ve had something to do with the connection between vampires and cannibalism kind of being on in the same
@kellyntaylor8184
Ай бұрын
I watched a Disney movie while reading Scream Fanfiction
@elliot__agares
Ай бұрын
Hannibal fanfiction is better ajjahahahah lol
@AmIALesbianOrJustBi
Ай бұрын
@@elliot__agares It definitely is
@graeson3317
Ай бұрын
Never did i ever think i would hear the words "hunted down by a priest" let alone hear them with a lisp.
@vindesiel4675
2 ай бұрын
nah but the reaction to the Bloody Mary is so real WHY DO PEOPLE DRINK THAT??
@oliviamoore5119
Ай бұрын
I think Stephanie is using getting turned into a vampire as a metaphor for having sex for the first time. Given meyer’s mormon background, Edward’s insistance that Bella marry him before he “turns” her, the constant references to how the “change” will irrevocably alter Bella physically and spiritually, Edward’s obsession with keeping her “pure” and how the “change” will forever damn her to hell and taint her soul, the potential duality of comparing becoming a vampire and having sex for the first time as an initiation into an exclusive society that physically changes a person’s body, has confusing rules with strict consequences, and the explicit requirement of informed consent prior to “transformation”, and lastly (and most shaky of my points, I admit) the strict taboo around “changing” the young to avoid stunting them (physically/psychologically) and to not rob them the innocence of youth. Stephanie’s projection knows no bounds
@henotic.essence
7 күн бұрын
Mormons stay deeply conflicted 😅
@willpospick9839
2 ай бұрын
This was amazing to watch. Can’t wait for the breaking dawn drinking game.
@willpospick9839
2 ай бұрын
Also I adore your parents responses
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
you’re trying to kill me
@willpospick9839
2 ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted no, this time it will be water. Gotta stay hydrated because you’re obviously thirsty for eddyboi.
@KendallMcClure
Ай бұрын
the absolute JUMPSCARE i got when you were acting out edward stadning behind bella
@honeymill9420
2 ай бұрын
Just called up my sister (it's 4:30am here) that I have a very fun game for tomorrow. She hung up the phone after I said "Twilight'' :'D
@GenderfluidRoyalty
Ай бұрын
I personally would LOVE that game
@niamh8641
Ай бұрын
With your point at 4:37...yes ive heard another creator refer to it as the "human yassification process" where SM basically made it canonically impossible for all her main characters to be anything other than white and hot 💀
@sarasheldi2143
2 ай бұрын
they're WEALTHY because if after 300 years of existing and they're still broke then what are we mortal humans going to do..
@msf2399
Ай бұрын
And because Alice uses her future vision to play the stock market.
@clawwestfall8799
7 күн бұрын
Realistically all you'd need for wealth is to have some money at the start and then to use compound interest... Given Carlisle was a doctor, he always had money and they also just didn't have expenses like food or rent.
@kiralink4141
Ай бұрын
1:28 I just started the video and I already know that you got blackout because there’s no way you got through the first half of the book without getting blackout
@LoreThunkers
Ай бұрын
Would it make it worse to tell you that Stephanie Meyer's vampires don't have fangs
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@LoreThunkers wait wait wait wait wait. HOW DID I NOT CATCH THIS?
@fearfulwolf
Ай бұрын
THAT’S LITERALLY THE MOST ICONIC PART OF VAMPIRES??? WHAT IS THIS MF ON??
@aeronruth416
Ай бұрын
I know the vampire bite being like instant plastic surgery was a joke but that’s basically how it’s portrayed in the movies 💀
@Rikrobat
Ай бұрын
It's that way in the books too, technically. Edward monologues about how vampires are apex predators that lure in their prey with their looks / voice / etc. So the vamp needs to be canonically attractive in some manner.
@andreachez2227
Ай бұрын
Let’s all take a moment and remember that Shades of Grey started out as a Twilight fanfiction.
@doctormaboule
7 күн бұрын
A lot makes sense when you remember that.
@ughugh3767
Ай бұрын
If we’re talking Elder Scrolls Oblivion, yes, becoming a vampire gives you a face lift and botox
@henotic.essence
7 күн бұрын
Snaaaatcheedd 😂
@veagrace
Ай бұрын
8:00 “MAYBE BELLA CANT READ” 🤣🤣🤣
@foxhedgehog1027
2 ай бұрын
highly relate to the drink swap
@luuuuux_
2 ай бұрын
i wish i had been able to drink when i read eclipse for the first time….. because i had the misfortune of reading the whole book while on a road trip with my family. i couldn’t even escape.
@ladyteddi
2 ай бұрын
you missed a drink! at 4:52 skin was mentioned!!
@i_am_very_vexed
2 ай бұрын
Saving this for my 21st lol
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
@@i_am_very_vexed I fear for you
@i_am_very_vexed
2 ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted just 2 more years 😭🤣
@Ottermyst
Ай бұрын
“Are you toasted little guy” lmaoo
@avilove8602
2 ай бұрын
Honestly i'm surprised that you didn't get rushed to the hospital for alc poisoning right after filming
@kinkanalchemist
2 ай бұрын
Edward vs Florida Gators sounds amazing (maybe because part of me is childishly convinced the gators would win and NOT break their poor teeth. Maybe vampire gators or a Florida cryptid?)
@chaoticbells
2 ай бұрын
I woke up at 4:00AM thirsty and ended up watching this - feels like a fever dream 😂 Can’t wait for Breaking Dawn, even without the alcohol it’s unhinged enough to make you wanna climb the walls 😂😂😂
@fullmetallovr21
2 ай бұрын
My friend made me watch new moon when we were in middle school and I was horrified that she thought this was romantic I shipped Bella with therapy
@Varahipatel-1
Ай бұрын
Thank god I will never have a teenage phase where I’m obsessed with twilight. These type of videos make me cautious of what type of book obsession I’ll be having ☺️
@user-is7xs1mr9y
5 күн бұрын
I did and it was ✨glorious ✨. Thankfully I never was in a romantic relationship so I was safe lol.
@Muffinn_Cakes
Ай бұрын
My siblings and I were just considering doing a twilight drinking game and then I open youtube to THIS
@WeirdGirlSafeSpace
Ай бұрын
Such an underrated find 😭 I will be subscribing
@yuffiefan7637
Ай бұрын
maturing means recognizing that Edward was toxic, not romantic
@saveme-j9p
Ай бұрын
"I know that canonically, Edward is hot, but I can't imagine him that way" KILLED ME
@Helena-ci6is
Ай бұрын
"skin is referenced" killed me, thanks for that! 😂
@F4IRY305
2 ай бұрын
Watching your content always brings me a smile I swear 😂
@Mambo1061
Ай бұрын
Having perused the comments quickly in the first minute or so of this video I can say I’m glad you had someone around who could drive you to the hospital for alcohol poisoning if need be LOL
@andianne1197
Ай бұрын
your reaction to bloody mary is exactly how i reacted when i first drank it as well 😭 i was used to drinking hugo, long island, vodka with any type of juice and then i said ''well, i should try this as well, who knows, i might end up liking it'' IT TASTED LIKE COLD PIZZA SAUCE.
@willowbg
Ай бұрын
I can't believe the funniest video i've ever watched is someone drinking and reading twilight (i will never be the same)
@abbiehannah_
Ай бұрын
The literary rant was not long enough. Give me more!!
@callagothly-d9q
Ай бұрын
i'm subscribing, i love the reading expressions. maybe a mocktail for the drinking games, or apple juice.
@birchbarks550
Ай бұрын
i took a double sip of WATER as i watched this and not even half way through my stomach started to hurt oh my GOD how were you alive at the end
@alexistourand8058
Ай бұрын
Oh dear. I knew that you wouldn’t make it past chapter 5 or 6 without being absolutely wasted.
@joeyseriously
Ай бұрын
The ending is everything
@_arsun__
2 ай бұрын
I have never read or seen twilight and i think it’s for the best bc the board looks insane yet accurate ToT
@chrisheartman9263
Ай бұрын
"What kinda money do the Cullens have?" and "She'd just might've gone and done the nasty with a marble statue" both can be addressed by the fact that Vampires are gay, old, rich and otherworldly beautiful by it's kind of trope that the kind of character brings. The fact that Stephenie Meyer might've made them straight and mormon and Steven Moffat might've made them just painfully straight is another kind of rabbit hole I DO NOT WANT TO TOUCH WITH A KILOMETER LONG STICK.
@sillyandsadprose
2 ай бұрын
oh if only team edward versus team jake was about who we thought was hottest. for some it is but mostly it’s not lol. would make our lives so much easier!!!!!
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
2 ай бұрын
I refuse to accept this as fact
@sillyandsadprose
2 ай бұрын
@@the.sequel.nobody.wanted as someone who has been in this fandom since 2009, i’m so jealous of your ability to do this 😭😭😭😭
@emmaserio5404
25 күн бұрын
Hi, me again! I rewatch this video often because it's officially a classic. I can't wait for you to read the rest!!! please update ASAP!!!
@batren04ren89
Ай бұрын
I love your tik toks I'm so glad to see you on KZitem! I adore your content
@the.sequel.nobody.wanted
Ай бұрын
@@batren04ren89 giggling, blushing, kicking my feet, crying, sobbing, throwing up. (I don’t know how to take a compliment, but thank you, it makes me so genuinely happy to hear that other people are enjoying my content.)
@kaycrocheted
Ай бұрын
this video was how i learned team edward or team jacob was who you thought was hotter
@Clara-qm2ic
Ай бұрын
I'm so glad that I read the whole series when I was still young enough to enjoy it
@heyoitsollie
Ай бұрын
0:22 trying to pay attention but Fishes baby blue eyes keep distracting me like whatever you say baby boi 🥰
@SomethingClever18
Ай бұрын
This whole video was so funny. Your parents are adorable, I loved that end segment!
@tiannagraham5210
17 күн бұрын
😭 your parents saying “you can’t kill yourself you’re a vampire” had me wheezing lmaooo and then scolding you for not taking the character seriously 😂
@Drankstyj
Ай бұрын
This was very fun to watch keep up the good work
@mewmew6158
Ай бұрын
12:06 this the realest reaction to reading garbage (I've wanted to do that so many times but, most bad books I read were borrowed from the library anyway).
@avar8015
22 күн бұрын
I don't know where you came from or how yt remembered my appreciation for roasting Twilight but I am SO GLAD there is someone on the internet who still do these kinds of things thanks queen
@kiralink4141
Ай бұрын
18:07 that was iconic “Vampires don’t exist…” Points to teeth
@stellydance
Ай бұрын
I did this with the My Immortal Twilight fanfic. In an attempt at self-preservation, I switched the alcohol to water, and took tiny sips instead. I gave myself water poisoning.
@hithereeee1
Ай бұрын
i need hours of content like this you dont even understand how funny and entertaining i found this. im not saying i want to monetize an alcohol addiction but if you HAD to do it monetized, yk.. (in all seriousness would watch with or without the commentary being fueled by alcohol, what a treat)
@Maugrimm
15 күн бұрын
I decided to do the drinking game with water. I got two glasses of water in. Thanks for helping me keeping hydrated 😅
@ellymyths
Ай бұрын
This is my first ever video of yours I have watched and this is beautiful Best way to read Twilight
@smoregurl
Ай бұрын
The fangs and edible glitter spray took me out 😂😂😂😂
@ghuleh6884
Ай бұрын
my response to every point on that board was "ohhh you're gonna die" gladly you somehow survived as far as you did but wow😭
@drizz8001
2 ай бұрын
Well this is the video I didn’t know I needed today. Top tier from beginning to end.
@brianamoore3288
Ай бұрын
I'm here to compulsively establish just because I *do* have the information: James the vampire in the first book is commented in his lore from the official guide that he was so overwhelmingly ugly as a human that being turned into a vampire made him just Okay Looking
@koolaidman_
Ай бұрын
Jasper being not just a confederate but someone who was chomping at the bit to join the confederacy is certainly...something from smeyer.
@swc5271
Күн бұрын
the mini ASMR moment was so good 😭
@JoPoZee
Ай бұрын
The gasp i gusp when those pages hit the floor. Like i know its deranged mormonistic nonsense but THE BOOOK. Also i love the bonus and the bonus. I cackled. It was glorious.
@gigilixch
Ай бұрын
I'm convinced Meyer has an unhealthy attraction to crazy men in fiction, so she writes them into her own books. Seeing your reaction to Bella's opinion on Cliff brought it home.
@sugar_bones_
Ай бұрын
this is my first time watching you and after watching this video i immediately subscribed 'cause i need this kind of chaotic energy in my life
@clarissarenee2851
17 күн бұрын
“Get your fingers… AWAH FROM MAAAEEEE” I am dying 😭😂 you are magnificent. Holy shit please do this forever. For life
@AceCookie
Ай бұрын
I think the "best friend (and werewolf)" and "boyfriend (and vampire)" bits are just supposed to be a refresher for those for whom it's been a while since they read the last book. I assume it would have been at *least* a year, probably longer, between the publishing dates of the books. People who only read the last one once (and weren't particularly tuned in to Twilight being a pop culture phenomenon) and hadn't picked it up again since might have needed the reminder. I know I've appreciated similar things once or twice in other books i've read
@oinkatomic
17 күн бұрын
never read twilight, and this video convinced me that i don't need to xD also the ASMR at 8:32 was honestly awesome, you should do more!!
@lilyobrien-ck7mh
Ай бұрын
As an Australian I had no idea what the confederate army even was, I looked it up and spent the next half an hour staring blankly at the ceiling, just why?
@jessthao
15 күн бұрын
This is has no business being THAT funny! Thanks for making me laugh, you should become a comedian
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