Honestly I hate it when people think having mental problems is cool or aesthetic, it's a serious thing people go through, not a trend.
@suikaberrii3251
Жыл бұрын
Definitely, especially in the "I'm not like the other girls" era too, they treat being alone and being misunderstood as cool and take down the "normal" people who just wanna do their own thing, it really is serious and does influence people, I was a kid and when seeing the trend I isolated myself more and more and got sad over the smallest things which resulted with me having serious anxiety, I regret it alot yeah it was stupid, but what do you expect from a kid who used their gadget for their whole life its an object that is precious to me much more than my own well being
@MoniqueBagelz
Жыл бұрын
Yeah when I have a mental breakdown ppl would just be like “lmao emoooo” and I’m just like so sad… yk?
@xTatlTaelx
Жыл бұрын
I hate it, too. The reality is much harsher. I wish I could turn it off like the people who use it as an aesthetic.
@chickennuggiepartygirl9749
Жыл бұрын
I think youtube deleted my comment but i said that bad mental health is not aesthetic and quirky. As someone who has depression, ARFID, anxiety and insomnia, its not cute and pretty. Its painful and miserable
@trixibankos8118
Жыл бұрын
as someone with diagnosed social anxiety (im sure people have it more rough than me but still) it icks me that someone would thinks this is cool or a vibe
@darksmiley5081
Жыл бұрын
Another danger, I feel, is that it makes people who actually have those illnesses seem "fake". Like, people thought I wasn't actually depressed ot had actual anxiety because they thought I was just trying to fit the aesthetic, when in reality, I was in such a dark place at that time. No one took me seriously because they just thought I was trying to be different
@LittleghOstGreen
Жыл бұрын
and of course surprisingly the part about not taking showers and keeping the same clothes for days isn't part of this whole "aesthetic"
@emilywilson985
Жыл бұрын
As someone diagnosed with bipolar 1 this messes with me in the sense that mental illness isn't being treated as a serious medical condition, but as something "for attention " which is what alot of people with genuine a diagnoses past since, well forever. This only sets us back. After covid i had people come up to me who used to tell me to "snap out of it" who by then had developed things like depression and PTSD and told me that they finally understood a peice of what i was going through and that they were sorry, and that felt really good, but like i said this only serves to hurt others.
@gudinesangelicau
Жыл бұрын
feel bad now that at one point I was part of those who thought "romanticized" mental illness was normal and thought self-isolation is okay. Its not, and I like that you adressed this!
@boombayuna536
Жыл бұрын
great video!
@lunanovaa
Жыл бұрын
Girl you look so beautiful 💗💗
@amelieb1814
Жыл бұрын
As some who is going through a really though break-up at the moment and who has literally been a sad girl for the last weeks, it’s hard to figure out why someone would actually want to be sad and glorify that. It’s horrible. Being really sad looks nothing like in those videos. For me, it looks like crying whatever I do, with my mom sitting next to me on my bed, holding my hand as a 30 year old woman. Being heartbroken and therefore sad is not an art. It’s literally just that: heart breaking. Please live your best life and try to focus on the positive, as I’m trying to as well.
@aryamishra1177
Жыл бұрын
wow i am honestly speechless thank you so much zoe for talking about this issue yes people listen sad songs and identify them as a cool person which is absolutely not healthy
@Liz-abeth
Жыл бұрын
Not only is it a sad white girl thing but it's also a sad white neurotypical girl thing. It's interesting and dramatic to be neurodivergent when it comes to the aesthetic but then when people open their eyes and realize that these neurodivergent people actually exist suddenly it's not okay and being neurodivergent is then bad and weird. We're freaks until we're used for aesthetic.
@blueghost4769
Жыл бұрын
They accept neurodivergence as long as it looks cute in a tiktok video. In real life they won't take you seriously and just think you're weird, probably won't even attempt to understand your problems.
@Liz-abeth
Жыл бұрын
@@blueghost4769 Exactly.
@kaileyinge08
Жыл бұрын
as someone with serious anxiety, its really sad to see these people trying to romanticize mental illnesses, problems or issues. i feel like i cant go ask for help because of how many people do this, resulting in the decline in so many peoples health, and that people will just ignore anyone who need serious help. another thing that hurts is when people use it as a way to gain attention - making other people feel invalid or not worth the help they may need.
@marenchristensen
Жыл бұрын
binge watching your videos is my religion
@marenchristensen
Жыл бұрын
not the scam-
@sleepwell_behappy4766
Жыл бұрын
This video is very interesting. It's good to talk about it. More people should watch it 🙌🏼
@annaluca29
Жыл бұрын
Comparing makeup to a painting is debatable, as using your own face as a canvas for a “work of art” does have the potential of impersonation/mockery, as compared to simply painting on a canvas.
@ayko_gn
Жыл бұрын
I think the reason why the sad girl aesthetic is the pretty white girl isn't because of priviledge but more so because it symbolizes that mental illness (or just sadness) isn't always reasonable, thus mystifying it even more. If you see someone sad with a clear reason as to why it loses any interest very soon.
@lenahaliniak7379
Жыл бұрын
Thank you, I needed to hear that
@taylorh9716
Жыл бұрын
Hot take but the snippets when you seem annoyed about the city’s sirens just gives me bad vibes. Somebody could be dying and you’re annoyed about the noise of the ambulance. Love your channel but seeing that in every video kinda has me annoyed. I recommend trying noice cancelling soundboards or moving to a different room. Either that or maybe just stop adding the clips in.. :(
@cherryblossom5685
Жыл бұрын
I was fine mentally then I joined TikTok my for you page was filled with glamours tiktoks about mental illness my mental health declined so badly I never left my bed and cried every day for over a month my mom took me to the doctor I was diagnosed with an eating disorder,depression, existential crisis,psychosis,ocd and potential gender dysphoria but turned out that I did not have it I was just confused about my sexuality. I broke up with my boyfriend and deleted all my social media after one year on medication I almost lost everything I loved, after a while I began to feel better I started to cry less, read books, watch tv take care of my skin and hygiene, I returned to school and got back to my boyfriend who still supported me even when we weren't together, today I'm not fully recovered I still have an eating disorder but I'm in a much better place and I'm so grateful for that. I've always heard people talking about the effects of social media on our mental health but I thought it's something that elder people say because they don't understand technology, now that I had experienced it myself I know that it's true and can happen to any of us, please be safe and remember no matter how hard it is you will get through it, I believe in you. Sending my love and support to anyone who is fighting to get better and also for those who are still waiting for it to get better ❤️
@visionofwellboyofficial
11 ай бұрын
As a college student who is struggling and constantly fighting with mental health issues, I found them so arrogant. And toxic. Sadness is part of a normal human life, not a trend. You don’t have to be happy 24/7. And this trend hit Mongolian social media users, too. I’m constantly being bombarded by random posts portraying mental illnesses as aesthetic and beautiful. Emo girl, emo boy, bla bla.
@remuspierre7573
Жыл бұрын
Amazing topics
@lindsayryan6223
Жыл бұрын
Oh god this is me when I’m manic 😢
@glitteryreen3908
Жыл бұрын
these aesthetics are going down hell each and everyday and it scares me and worries me about the future and the mental health of the youth and younger generations.
@sparkymularkey6970
Жыл бұрын
I feel like I don't have the luxury of being a Sad Girl because, as a Native American woman, our pain is "old news."
@nimvicky
Жыл бұрын
it’s giving romanticism (as in the 1800’s art movement)
@cosmiqoutcast6767
Жыл бұрын
Zoe, you seem like a kind person. Why are you so obsessed with beauty? It's heartbreaking. You spread awareness, for sure, but why the need to curate everything, from decor to mannerism to soft speaking?
@smolb0i270
Жыл бұрын
tiktok rly be turning everything into an aesthetic
@lok0868
Жыл бұрын
my favourite EVER tiktok screenshot said - 'you're not in your fleabag or sally rooney era. modern media has just excessively romanticized deranged and mentally ill women and thus creating a whole generation of young women who would rather wallow in self imposed agony than get help and find healing because they think stability will make them mundane and uninteresting.' nothing has ever hit that hard for me since
@Kaybye555
Жыл бұрын
Exactly!!! Then we have a lot of people who come and sy "you don't understand", "it's not me", "you can't take depression away", when they are eating poorly, not looking for help, not going out, drinking and or smoking, and actively seeking situations and people who make them worse. That's not real depression and it sucks to see people pretend that this is the same thing
@stickynotes2040
Жыл бұрын
@@Kaybye555 All of those things you mentioned can come as a result of depression. Just because someones glamorizing there mental illness or not actively seeking out help does not mean there mental illness isn't real. Who are you to decide who has "real depression" and who doesn't?
@Kaybye555
Жыл бұрын
@@stickynotes2040 I'm obviously talking about people who don't... Why so triggered? Do you do this? I'm someone with chronic depression. Doesn't mean I gotta protect everyone's' feeling when they are doing something wrong. Whatever the reason
@Kaybye555
Жыл бұрын
@@PostalDude97 that doesn't make it a good coping mechanism. Just because someone does something doesn't mean it's a good thing
@erwinsmissingarm4692
Жыл бұрын
yeah the whole “ill loose my sparkle if im not depressed anymore” idea. like babe, what sparkle
@joelleneedssleep
Жыл бұрын
I have actual diagnosed depression amongst other mental illnesses and I really appreciate you covering this topic. It bothers me that the "sad girl" aesthetic is being so glorified nowadays. Being sad and having depression are two very different things and having to deal with depression is really hard, a daily struggle.
@jenna0158
Жыл бұрын
I do as well and I totally agree. It's mentally and physically tolling and it's not pretty at all. I hate the 'crying girl makeup' trend.
@joelleneedssleep
Жыл бұрын
@@jenna0158 yeah when I was at one of my lowest points I lost twenty pounds (I'm already skinny so I literally just looked so sick) and I think it perfectly represented my then mental state
@thaisferreira748
Жыл бұрын
Yes. Totally agree
@mellybear
Жыл бұрын
amen to that. depression ruined my schooling and especially work. almost my relationship too. so its kinda sad to see this topic. I dont use social media for reasons like this. (even tho social media tbh is more suppose to make connections) but any who, never knew this was a 'trend' that has been happening.
@FoundSheep-AN
Жыл бұрын
You should not believe in every “diagnosis” a “doctor” make
@Thildia
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for saying that. The way my hair looks because I haven't been able to wash it for so long, the way I stink and feel ashamed because I couldn't shower for days, or the way my breath smells because I couldn't care for my teeth are not an aesthetic. That's what lies behind those pretty moody pinterest boards
@Moonstar-i8k
Жыл бұрын
Frfr. I agree
@chickennuggiepartygirl9749
Жыл бұрын
Its not just something u can put on like an outfit, its a whole emotional void
@hayleegrace9503
Жыл бұрын
the way i cant be there for the people i love, the way its hard for me to clean my room, or the way its so goddamn difficult to not overthink everything i touch.
@donnaherrera7415
Жыл бұрын
YES. Suicidal idealization to look cute is disgusting. They're missing the actual shame and guilt that comes with true suicidal tendencies. I know sure as hell I don't want to feel the need to end my life. When I am at my lows, I don't think about it, but once the feeling passes I am overcome with shame. Like fuck, again? Why can't I be normal? Normal and happy people don't feel like this. I promised myself I wouldn't go that far. I promised to love myself. Grounding myself. Trying to remember why I chose to fight against these urges. A lot of this is all internal dialogue that you carry upon waking up and going to sleep; all of this is never said out loud. It's a fucking struggle.
@Jiyu90cayi
Жыл бұрын
Depression is exactly something serious something real not a simple aesthetic
@ExploringWithRandR640
Жыл бұрын
I’m really glad to see this being discussed- I’m a 40 year old mom of a 13 year old girl that started down a slippery slope of this sad girl aesthetic last year. I pulled her from the school she was attending and outlawed certain apps once I saw what was going on. She was showing true signs of depression, so we got her started on Zoloft and into therapy but I think the change of mindset and environment helped more than anything. Now when I pick her up from school, she’s hugging her (non sad) friends and there are times I have to choke back tears to keep from embarrassing her in front of these friends. She has admitted to her therapist that her previous friends influenced her depression and now knows what she wants to avoid. It’s been a beautiful thing to witness 👩👧❤
@gwenbar8144
Жыл бұрын
I'm happy to see that you're daughter is happy now ! this aesthetic is really dangerous because it can really cause mental disorders such as depression. You had the right reflexes, she is lucky to have you
@ExploringWithRandR640
Жыл бұрын
@@gwenbar8144 thank you- I know she thought I was a jerk for a few weeks for taking away her “friends” and limiting access, but I’m really thankful she sees the light now!
@CarolaTesla
Жыл бұрын
THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for taking action. My mom never really cared about my depression, never cared about any of my traumas, she pretty much doesn't care about my mental health at all. I wish I had a mom like you growing up. As a depressed 27 year old I'm telling you, you are saving your daughter from a life of misery. I'm wishing you both the best!!
@ExploringWithRandR640
Жыл бұрын
@@CarolaTesla I am sending you love 🫶🏻
@gwenbar8144
Жыл бұрын
@@ExploringWithRandR640 I can imagine that it was not easy for her at the beginning but in the end she is surely grateful for it now
@rightwhereyouleftme
Жыл бұрын
The worst thing is, the more you look at it, the more you feel that way and it confirms your deep feelings. Then the next day when you don't go online and see it you feel fine. It plays with your mind. (writing from experience)...
@sunnyskies..
Жыл бұрын
Frrr I definitely agree with you
@Is0lt
Жыл бұрын
AMEN
@meganejean2354
Жыл бұрын
Yes I feel that way watching it
@joannacordero4942
Жыл бұрын
I love Lana Del Rey so much, her songs gives me so much comfort and some of her songs gives a message from things she been through. But sometimes I hate it when people compare her art as sad girl and wishing they had violent relationship just like her. First of all she’s telling her story and her lyrics is giving the story but I hate the internet just want to compare the glamorous aesthetic from it than the real issue.
@victoriaaaaa.
Жыл бұрын
literally
@sophia1073
Жыл бұрын
THIS
@valentinamonte6
Жыл бұрын
Came here to write exactly this, thank you for pointing it out!
@andreang13
Жыл бұрын
Yes. People always misunderstand Lana’s music.
@ApplesRush
Жыл бұрын
Yes 😭 I love Lana so much. Might I add, her lyrics (especially the earliest ones) also reflected some kind of persona she had to endure in the business. It was her style and aesthetic all along, but I can’t help myself but think it was all exacerbated by the need of creating this kind of persona. Her recent lyrics are definitely more intimate and personal: she has admitted multiple times she was depressed and I don’t think there’s anything bad in expressing one’s suffering through art. It just get messy when labels and marketing get in the way.
@zoeunlimited
Жыл бұрын
Hope you are all doing well 🤍What are your thoughts on the “sad girl aesthetic”? 🥀
@MIDZYwhoisaFEARNOTandSTAYingMY
Жыл бұрын
I think its absolutely horrible and should not be promoted in any way MENTAL ILLNESS IS NOT BEAUTIFUL!!
@fern8018
Жыл бұрын
this video was one of the most interesting i’ve watched, and i really have a new perspective now. thank you zoe :)
@freecookiesplease
Жыл бұрын
Is offensive. Lol got me pissed watching this :/
@lisalolz-dgaf5860
Жыл бұрын
Definitely making fun of serious problems, like girls out there trying to recreate the crying look w makeup while I frantically Google ways to depuff my eyes and face before going to school .
@blinksters2158
Жыл бұрын
It’s sad that people are sitting there and trying to cry to be able to tell their friends
@eternallaurum
Жыл бұрын
I hate the "crazy girl" aesthetic just as much. As a guy with schizoaffective disorder, I hate how many girls try and act like being toxic is the same as having psychosis. I get demonized as being "dangerous" simply for having my illness as well as being a man. I can't ever show symptoms or talk about my illness because of the stigma while these girls walk around using "craziness" for attention. It's so disrespectful because they're usually the same girls that would call an actual individual with psychosis a freak if they ever encountered them in real life.
@amblinky630
Жыл бұрын
frfr
@SpaQueenRocks
Жыл бұрын
Yes, I feel like I can't ever be transparent about my mental issues because they're an automatic red flag. People will run before truly getting to know me, because they wouldn't want to "risk it". Too much trauma and baggage.
@daidied
Жыл бұрын
Mental health is slowly starting to not be taken seriously anymore. Ive seen some many people be like "I'm mental unstable" or "I'm so depressed" and they use this as their whole personality. Have mental health issues is like a joke or a quirky trait to them.
@victoriaaaaa.
Жыл бұрын
literally. or they take it lightly. like “my room is messy and i don’t like it. i guess i have OCD”. and people will say “no one says that” but i’ve had many friends say exactly that and take it as a quirk or use it for attention.
@catm6161
Жыл бұрын
It's bizarre, an ongoing issue that communities still have trouble dealing with, and it's either normalized or belittled in order to keep up appearances. There are countless stories of families being broken apart, workplaces being toxic environments, and yet it's deemed as 'expected' or that people are only becoming more 'sensitive' instead. It's bittersweet that with social media these issues can be tackled in a healthy way and yet people choose to 'hurt' themselves in front of others as a solution instead (makeup can be used to send a message however it's clear once it became a trend the message was lost).
@ki2348
Жыл бұрын
Those kinds of people make my blood boil. I hate it when they make out of pocket edgy statements.
@ki2348
Жыл бұрын
@@victoriaaaaa. BLEUGH it bugs me a lot when people do that. I don’t want to self diagnose or whatever (this is so ironic) but when I was in fifth grade I constantly had intrusive thoughts like “If you don’t do this your family will die” or other gross intrusive thoughts. I didn’t understand what was happening and thought I was going crazy because I’ve not found out what OCD was at the time. It’s so frustrating to hear people say “omg i’m literally so OCD”
@maya07_11
Жыл бұрын
it was never taken seriously
@spaceninja7984
Жыл бұрын
I think the issue is not only "making yourself" a sad girl, or wallowing in self-pity for attention. Might be kind of a response to the frustration of unstable and decaying mental well-being. I bet a lot of girls embrace the aesthetic because it gives them a weird sense of control, being the ones responsible for their own sadness and mental issues. Basically, a community for people who feel helpless and find comfort in exposing their problems as part of their beauty.
@sophiallama
Жыл бұрын
This. I think a lot of this sad girl aesthetic comes from actually depressed people who cope with their sadness by seeing it as a beautiful part of themselves. They are struggling and they do need help. There’s definitely a deeper issue than girls just looking for attention.
@alrighttumbleweed4782
Жыл бұрын
I agree. There's a lot of assumption in the discourse around this, that the sad girl won't be seeking out help because she loves romanticizing her mental illness so much. And I'm sure for some people that's the case. But the OG Tumblr sad girls I knew were all trying (often failing) to get help from adults/therapists. Some of them were going through these more public ups and downs due to hormone shifts from testing antidepressants. Maybe their social media was "mentally ill aesthetic" but they didn't actually enjoy being sad. The girls I knew leaned into the tragic trend because they had been hurt emotionally by conventionally pretty, toxically positive people and had given up on trying to fit into those standards. Crying content was a backlash against society, a raw/jarring way to show people that things they say and do to someone can actually destroy them. Unfortunately people bond over similarities, so the perpetually sad will understand each other more and group together. They can empathize with each other's struggles and help each other feel like you can still be mentally ill and attractive. They inspire each other to feel better about themselves while also unintentionally role modeling unhealthy behaviors too. Finally they have a friend group, and are seen as beautiful (add: loved for "who they truly are" and not having "fake friends") But at the same time they are now getting advice and perspective from friends who also haven't got much hope or self-compassion.
@mishynaofficial
Жыл бұрын
Ok, but why is that socially acceptable only if the white beautiful girl's doing it?
@lisalolz-dgaf5860
Жыл бұрын
Wich brings us back to the point of failing to acknowledge societal issues without romanticising it: people pushed back serious problems like mental illness labeling it as "taboo" for centuries , yet once the rich powerful white ppl (not generalising)try to profit from it in order to cover up the shitty power dynamic , and seem more "relatable "and "different but so similar " it magically becomes an open subject. And so, naive young marginalised folk buy into their joke of a representation due to how horrendously they were treated before , they try to embrace their imperfections while simultaneously wanting to appeal to the standard put thanks to fantasy (aka RePrEsEnTaTiOn) portrayed through media .
@Kaybye555
Жыл бұрын
That doesn't mean it's a good way to deal with it.
@pr6087
Жыл бұрын
This is so damn true and it’s getting outta control
@ephem-eris
Жыл бұрын
When people are going through dark times, we should be empathetic with them and direct them towards getting help if it’s a serious issue. I feel that romanticizing mental health issues stems from wanting to be relatable to everyone in that we’re all human and have bad days, but it has grown to be unhealthy where we should instead focus on recovering from mental illness and learning to live in tandem with it.
@Kaybye555
Жыл бұрын
Exactly. The goal is to get better but now when we try to help we get sarcastic remarks and pushback. These sad girl episodes just feed onto the bad and make things worse. It will push people away, it is not others responsibility to feed onto this "sadness"
@veronicah5268
Жыл бұрын
The "sad girl aesthetic" prevented me from seeking help for so many years because I thought I was better off just feeling sad. It was a nasty journey to get help, go to therapy, get diagnosed... This needs to stop. It's not ✨ pretty ✨to be ill. People die because of it. I almost died because of it and there was nothing aesthetic about it.
@parkjibuns638
Жыл бұрын
My thoughts, as someone who constantly wants to die and with diagnosed major depression, is that the sad girl aesthetic isn't something you want in reality. It sucks so bad and I would give anything to not feel the negative emotions the way I do. Anyways, notification gang 😊
@h.taraghi
Жыл бұрын
I really wish happiness was a trend:)
@theravenscout4569
Жыл бұрын
Me too. I prefer happiness and positivity
@theravenscout4569
Жыл бұрын
I was very depressed a couple months ago but somehow I've learnt to overcome from this feeling. I just try to focus on things I can control
@hennesey8
Жыл бұрын
I noticed this. Last onto I googled love and in love bc I wanted some drawing inspired, but 95% of thebreaults were heartbreak, suffering, saddness.. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE SAD OR SUFFER FOR LOVE OR BC OF LOVE. IT DONT HAVE TO BE LIKE THAT SIS. dayum
@_xmiriamx281
Жыл бұрын
THIS!!! I got so tired of seeing painful and angsty romances. Like please let me read a sweet romance with no issues and complications.
@khushisharma7698
Жыл бұрын
True. Whenever I watch these stories themed on painful love, I always think maybe my last relationship was not toxic or that's how love is supposed to be. But it's not, it's what the situation of the people involved is, not the things they do voluntarily.
@elephantsac3961
Жыл бұрын
I’m the complete opposite of this. I try my best to be happy, even when nobody’s around, because I think people who are happy are more attractive. I’m a romantic, and my depression has gotten in the way of most of my relationships, alongside my career and studies, so overcoming that is the number one goal
@goodfriend2603
Жыл бұрын
Same. Like I do cry and feel sad but I try to give positive vibes, especially when I’m around people. So seeing people like this just makes me feel so disgusted.😢
@nicolec.5352
Жыл бұрын
I’m the same as you. I was sad for so long (I have BPD and bipolar disorder, diagnosed 10 years ago) that now thanks to medication and therapy I have become a kinda happier person, and that’s my goal, to be someone cheerful to be around. I’ve noticed that being more cheerful has attracted people’s attention more, I’m making new friends despite being in my 40’s now, and people want to be with me, it’s such a nice experience. I lost my 30’s been sad and miserable, I remember been on tumblr 24/7 writing about how sad and suic*dal I was. Now I can say things are funnier, better and happier. 😊
@elephantsac3961
Жыл бұрын
@@nicolec.5352 ah that’s amazing to hear! That’s another thing about mental health, you almost want to say online how awful you’re feeling, because you want to hear that someone cares. Issue is, people treat it as being attention seeking and over-exaggerating, probably because of this aesthetic
@ev2812
Жыл бұрын
This is definitely one of my favourite topics you've talked about so far. I would definitely say that this needs to be talked about more because it is important to acknowledge these different aesthetics being made from serious topics
@kenamarte4609
Жыл бұрын
I remember this time, I was like ten or eleven years old, I was studying in the kitchen table and got so stressed that I started crying it out. My mom was there and as I heard a camera sound turned to look at her only to find she was taking a picture of me crying, and got so upset that I asked her why and she just said "oh, just, you know, you look pretty like this"
@ohlookadandelion
Жыл бұрын
thats....messed up....
@craigmeister1241
Жыл бұрын
Can't believe what world we live in today where the first instinct of some parent is to take a photo of their kid crying rather than asking them what's wrong and helping them.
@jasmineneuser5993
Жыл бұрын
Wtfff
@shineinstars
Жыл бұрын
that's so fucked up wtf?? im so sorry she did that to u :-(
@yikes.3000
Жыл бұрын
you are definitely one of my fav youtubers with really high quality content!! keep going, ly ❤️
@throughalfanoir7302
Жыл бұрын
I wonder how much of me buying into the sad girl aesthetic (moreso in my younger years) is fueled by only ever receiving any attention/concern/affection when I was suffering (e.g. sick and hurt) and never for my achievements/attributes
@OuiMimi
Жыл бұрын
The sad boy aesthetic is also so problematic🥲
@pandagirlmagic9525
Жыл бұрын
Okay but lets be honest..who has seen an "ugly" person cry in social media?...Not many am I right? o-o Mostly it is "pretty" girls that are recording themselves cry for views. A very few amount of people are actually doing it to help themselves...Thats just my opinion though...
@Kathleen483
Жыл бұрын
mental health really has a harsh reality, it's not supposed to be romanticized or encouraged. i realized on tiktok many of the videos are known to be depressing or su!c!d@l. some people had noticed these videos would make them feel more down. this should not be a normalized "trend/aesthetic" as it seems problematic and can impact others. thanks for coming to attention on this topic zoe :)
@ariella75
Жыл бұрын
You are honestly such a wonderful content creator who never fails to unapologetically put the point across on the current reality/ happenings of the media and industry It's rare to find someone who doesn't do this for clout or trend but does this from a point of genuine interest and concern Sending lots of good wishes Zoe 💛
@sumbunny2009
Жыл бұрын
Honestly, the sad girl aesthetic and sad (girl) art used to make me feel like I could only ever be an artist if I continued to feel miserable in life. This led to me not wanting to feel better even though I hated my life. It's a long time ago. I don't want to an artist anymore and I do feel better and think differently now. But all this romanization of suffering can be really dangerous
@sprigganpanda
Жыл бұрын
I create my art from joy, but really you can use any emotion or you can just focus on a cool idea. It's an outlet, and if you're sad a lot with art as your outlet you get a lot of practice which makes your art better.
@sumbunny2009
Жыл бұрын
@@sprigganpanda now i also create from joy. But back than I always heard about pain being the best inspiration and what not
@emmathereb
Жыл бұрын
The trend hits me hardest when I catch how I look in the mirror after an episode. And I get these bitter intrusive thoughts about sad girl aesthetic and what it really looks like. “This makeup isn’t hot it’s just caked from the sweat and tears” “sad isn’t cool when you’re depression outfit is stained to hell” “I bet their sadness smells like flowers mine smells like a locker room” “am I sad bc social media or bc my brain needs an excuse for my emotions” “how do they stand in front of a camera when they feel like that” mad mad mad
@ki2348
Жыл бұрын
This is pretty relatable. I remember a few years ago when I was a very young teenager following along with this aesthetic and after crying and going to the bathroom i remember feeling disgust in the way i looked because it wasn’t pretty. Now natural crying is kinda beautiful to me? i hope you get what i mean
@jsndakjfn
Жыл бұрын
I wish that Lana del Rey was known more for her dark feminine vibe instead of her sad girl vibe
@nirvana3795
Жыл бұрын
As a person with a chronic mental illness that has to take pills daily to keep me stable, I find this to be so dishearting that they treat this like a joke. Mental illness is no joke, its a long hard battle that constantly requires you to keep fighting because it doesn't just go away.
@freecookiesplease
Жыл бұрын
This is offensive and ridiculous for people who has clinical depression or another disorder, there's nothing cool in this. Yes, I am talking for me.
@Ameliatopham3
Жыл бұрын
Agreed
@Ameliatopham3
Жыл бұрын
It's horrible that people think it's a trend when we have people struggling and getting told it's for attention because people online doing it for followers it makes me well angry
@freecookiesplease
Жыл бұрын
Lol, no, really I am pissed watching this.
@Ameliatopham3
Жыл бұрын
@@freecookiesplease so am i
@theravenscout4569
Жыл бұрын
I agree
@WeirdlyWonderfulASMR
Жыл бұрын
*waves hello* kindly remember you don't have to force yourself to have a "happy new year" when you're not feeling it~ This reminds me of Mina Le's commentaries - I hope you two will amicably meet since you're in the same space ^^
@jenzie75
Жыл бұрын
I like your take on this, just curious where you got the 2015 from. This aesthetic for the beautiful sad girl trope has been around in movies since I was a kid in the 80s.
@kurtapika7991
Жыл бұрын
probably because of tumblr. The sad girl trope became popular on tumblr during 2015, and quickly spread to other apps and websites.
@cansueceklc7745
Жыл бұрын
I believe it goes way back to ancient times. A crying woman is often used as a beauty symbol in many myths. I've even once read a story about a woman who would do and say extremely sad, weird things just to appear mysterious and interesting. It was after she died that her love interest discovered who she really was and I found the irony hilarious. It was written in the 19th century by the russian writer Turgenyev. The sad girl aesthetic was probably always in ever since the beginning of time.
@lunassyren
Жыл бұрын
As someone who had MAJOR depressive episodes and been at the lowest one can be, I don't really care. The sad girl aesthetic or even romanticizing mental illness doesn't bother me one bit. But then again, I'm the kind of individual that doesn't get affected at all with what others do with their life. When you're in hell in your mind, you don't care about the sad girl aesthetic or whatever, you don't care about aesthetics at all. Or at least that's how I felt, which is the complete opposite of what I am when I'm doing good mentally. I love aesthetics(I am a photographer) and if the pictures are beautiful, I like them. There is something beautiful in sadness sometimes and some people might cope with it by making art out of it. I sometimes do too, when I'm a little low but not completely.
@avabellag13
Жыл бұрын
Don't get me wrong I love Lana Del Rey but I think that the 'sad girl' aesthetic is disrespectful to people who have serious problems (depression).
@Patience2dream
Жыл бұрын
That one girl that literally added running boogers to her makeup 💀
@iii.5
Жыл бұрын
Hi I love your videos! Also with the topics in the video, at school there are a few girls who are a little into the 'sad girl' aesthetic and they think its 'cool' when it isn't. I actually do struggle with that stuff and its not really super nice, sorry if this sounds gross but sometimes I can't bother to get up and brush my teeth/hair, shower etc, and those same 'sad girls' would make fun of me for it because I would walk into school a mess with eye bags and messy hair and I would kinda stumble around, one of the girls even would call me a literal zombie at times and I just think its weird that they think it's cool but they make fun of people who actually have their lives affected by it..
@yakvlutaddict13
Жыл бұрын
honestly this needs to be talked about more. Thanks for spreading awareness.
@libaaleksandravitola9239
Жыл бұрын
I feel like the "sad girl aestetic" puts pressure on crying- if you are not crying you are not sad... Me and my "friends" were talking about their problems and how they feel, and I just mentioned the fact I am also not 100% mantally ok, but just bc I had not cried for months they told me to shut up...
@theravenscout4569
Жыл бұрын
That's okay not to cry. It shows you're strong to keep going
@daisyinmydays
Жыл бұрын
This aesthetic of "mental problems" makes me really angry. People spend a huge amount of money, time and effort to become normal and help themselves.
@snugglyduck6534
Жыл бұрын
It's ingrained in our being for throughout history, it was always a goddess or a supernatural female tears that were responsible for beauty or life or even precious gems. In Ancient Greek mythology Aphrodite was the goddess of love and beauty. According to her myth when she wept in sorrow and grief her tears were transformed into flowers and as they fell to the ground they blossomed into anemones. This world was often referred to as a sea of sorrows. idk about you, but weeping is a recoverable state of sadness, a release, for when fully depress you miss the tears for you're too disconnected from emotions and full on in apathy, my assumption of why cutting is a thing. Whenever I was in a morbidly dangerous state of depression, I was more careful to cover up my emotional state so others wouldn't get in the way if I did act upon it. There's a song called No Surprises by Radiohead that speaks to that, it's like okay no alarm bells, no surprises, I'm done. I guess it can be a bit disingenuous for others to play upon emotional states for empathy or even profit, but for people desperate to hear others speak to a pain they cannot share with anyone in their lives due to alarm bells and people trying to cheer you up or fix you, I feel it can help many get through it or at least recognize they're not alone in it. The last thing I want when I'm down is a happy song, but the last thing I want when I'm happy is a sad song - so I feel it's acceptable in the contribution of media and art to always have the availability of all emotions for those in different states in their journey called life - something to match their expression. But the downside of making it just aesthetic and not substantive is it can also enable others who are truly enduring to indulge in the feelings for a more dangerous length, so it's always good to expose it with videos like this to make others aware of the bigger picture. And sometimes you just have to call it what it is, like we all came into this world crying and screaming so perhaps it's sort of a default state that should let us become more tolerant of our mood swings and not dwell on this persistence that we should be happy since happiness is a pursuit for a reason. What I hate is knowing these MLM type trends spawn channels that generate viral trends, and then others who are suffering actually try to post their emotional health state and I just don't want to think how further heartbreaking it must be for them to see 1 or 2 or 5 views with potentially some bot comment like "Great vid - I like it" to feel invisible again.
@am32074
Жыл бұрын
Ohh that's explain a lot about my up mental health, it makes me hold into my sad state for longer than necessary cuz i want the aesthetic. its funny how after a mental breakdown in the bathroom i would stare at the mirror and wonder if i look pretty (ㅠ_ㅠ) if i think i do look pretty i then force myself to cry some more cuz i liked the delicate look i have. In a way it makes me distracted from what im even sad about and feel a bit better if that makes sense. But I sometimes look at the mirror but my eyes were so red with snot everywhere and I think "ew i look ugly" this thought makes me a little more sad... yeh its doesn't feel as good as it looks.
@machinegworl
Жыл бұрын
people be glorifying depression like as if you don’t wake up and not have any energy at all to live for the day or take care of yourself in anything. And I mean in everything. 😐 fortunately I was able to come over my depression with therapy and medication but it has taken a big toll on me for how it ruined me mentally and physically. these girls who do these trends are the worst lol
@himadrisharma6877
Жыл бұрын
I'm someone who just gets sad like too much ig? There have been times when I just say rotting in my bed , loosing all the motivation to do a certain. Still I do feel that I DO NOT SUFFER FROM DEPRESSION because I think it is much worse. I'm sad rn but the next moment I'm happy so that doesn't makes me depressed. However,My uncle actually suffers from depression and lemme tell you ITS THE WORST THING in THE WORLD. He attempted Suc*de so yeah it can't be more heartbreaking. My blood just boils everytime when I see these WANNABE INFLUENCERS glorifying this shit. I just hope and pray to God that no one just suffers from this
@ohlookadandelion
Жыл бұрын
i feel like this is the trend that made me feel like an attention seeker whenever I'm sad or crying
@greendino5422
Жыл бұрын
Another thing is that these aesthetics never show a diverse amount problems, like drug addiction or oversexulization. They only show problems like a breakup. And I’m not saying that breakups aren’t hard, I’m just saying that these aesthetics only show a very specific group of problems.
@zhenpov
Жыл бұрын
I used to be like this too. I used to indulge in the sad girl trope just because social media glamorized the "uniqueness" of it and passed it as being "relatable" yet exclusive. It felt good to feel like I was being myself naturally and that so many people found it cool or pretty. But when my actual disorders started worsening, did it help? No. It didn't. It didn't do anything to help me in the slightest and being actually sad while trying to be a sad girl to everyone else just made me feel like an imposter. It felt so invalidating. Now I'm mature enough to understand how tiring it is. I actually want to get better and it's so exhausting trying to be and failing at what social media portrays. It created this toxic stubbornness in me, telling me that I didn't want to get better because the world around me has this expectation and idea of what I should be, as an actual sad girl.
@the_cheeky_geek6278
Жыл бұрын
Thank you for discussing this. Those of us with debilitating mental illnesses are so tired of being glamorized and vilified at the same time. Trust me, when I'm "sad" it's anything but attractive. I don't really want to see people pretend to suffer for an aesthetic while I'm struggling to brush my hair for the first time in a week, as these same individuals look down on for my reality.
@Abligurition
Жыл бұрын
Although I understand that glamourising certain behaviours is not ethically correct, I also believe that romanticising sadness is not the same as telling people that hurting themselves is okay. I feel like in your video there is no real distinction between "harmful sadness" (as in cutting, drugging or starving yourself) and "physiological sadness". This is something that I've learnt in my mid-twenties when I was seeing a therapist. I asked if I was clinically depressed and the therapist answered that no, I was sad because sadness was my predominant emotion. Sadness is my main line. I like it and I leared to love it after I was taught by the therapist how to control it. After that, I never became a happy person, but I was happily accepting my sadness as part of myself. I don't want to say that I gave myself up to depression - because I didn't - but I accepted the fact that sadness is part of who I am. And one more thing: I think that the greatest power of sadness is its cathartic action on our minds. Nothing is as effective as a good cry to shove anxiety and fear out of our bodies. Also, the soothing feeling of nostalgia that comes with pain. It makes people feel alive. Please, take this comment as a personal opinion. I'm not talking about clinical depression. People with mental illness already know that they have a problem and they probably don't think much of a random photo of a random person crying on the internet.
@Ilovefairlifemilk
Жыл бұрын
Attention seeking behavior and the romantization of mental illness or pain can also used as a cry for help by teen girls. The reaching for help and chase for acceptance runs the grief of typical adolecence. They want help. They want to be understood. Unfortunatly, the greed of the world loves to profit off of this.
@asscretin3158
Жыл бұрын
Teenage girls don't usually get taken seriously.
@xiaoramyun
Жыл бұрын
Mental health isnt aesthetic its smth we deal with with gr8 challenges and difficulty that many ppl without these problems at least nt to the severe lv will understand and will prolly downplay what we feel and what we are experiencing and every attack as smth small that can juz be overcome juz by saying "oh youre gon be fine" and shit and sometimes i or we are gon be fine and we know that despite having one of my anxiety atk but most o the time we are nt and sometimes we have to say that we are ok cuz if nt ppl ard me or us except for some will prolly eat us up like im a prey to be eaten and thats hw the world is to me and nt only me, to some others as well, juz cuz our mental health aint good and we are dealing with shits that many nowadays juz uses as a trend...
@jadziawynter9241
Жыл бұрын
I notice that a part of the sadness is from break ups, lost love, and tragic romance but what if ur aromantic? Or romance is not a priority Can the sad girl aesthetic still hold up if the tragic romance is taken away?
@eugeniaagnesrombelayuk1789
Жыл бұрын
“Emotions are not luxury, they are a complex aid in the fight for existence.” -Antonio R. Damasio
@hyelimchoi_
Жыл бұрын
if i could bottle all of my depression and put it in an aesthetic i would be fucken unstoppable lmfao
@dreamy_teaparty_princess
Жыл бұрын
The "crying girl makeup" trend is not healthy at all. It's giving "depression, but make it pretty" it's not pretty, it hurts so bad mentally and physically and it's not an astetic. And it's not pretty, when you cry for 1 hour your eyes are gonna be red and puffy and not perfect for the camera Sorry if this made no sense I tried to write my thoughts
@lillefis32
Жыл бұрын
People going thru trauma, then there's these people, making make up videos about it cause its being traumatized is cool and aesthethic✨️
@LotusesGalaxyOcean
Жыл бұрын
Are we really saying the sad girl trope isn't cross cultural? It has existed across cultures and time periods. The aesthetics just vary, but the archetype is the same. They have vulnerability and fragility combined with beauty which is an attention getter because those who are beautiful are usually high status and thus hard to reach. It's like finding treasure in the sewer. Also, being able to drive your mind and body to the edge and still look beautiful indicates a very strong level of health and endurance. It's akin to a gauntlet of self destruction that is also a proving ground. I don't recommend it, but there is a reason why certain patterns reoccur across time and space.
@Lera-nv1lq
Жыл бұрын
It's really great that you put pictures of Lana Del Rey here, because once she gained some weight, she's no longer 'sad girl' and no one really cares about her feelengs in the internet. It's literally just stupid priveleged aestetic here.
@xxxcccc7452
Жыл бұрын
Thanks for covering this topic Zoe . Mental illness were being treated like a trend on social media.The things i have gone through, everyone has through isn't just a asthetic. I couldn't help but feel so traumatized see those things taken this way it was frustrating.i am glad we are talking about this..
@freshstrawberry
Жыл бұрын
As a young girl growing up surrounded by this, I think that this crying girl aesthetic has made me invalidate some emotions. If somebody's crying every night due to loss or their state of mental health, I think communication with another person should be sought (specifically a therapist). But seeing all these people always crying and it being branded and monetized has made me dehumanize emotions and experiences that come with sadness, rather believe that it was only for "beauty" and "attention". It's made the lining between sadness as a trend, and sadness as in raw pain blurry to me, and when I feel these emotions whether it's worth talking to somebody about, or I'm just faking it for attention. Also as a young girl of color, you talking about how this aesthetic specifically is portrayed with white girls made me think of "white women tears" -- how media has been curated to sympathize with white girls crying, thus leading to the silencing women of color.
@rebeccascacchetti
Жыл бұрын
One question that it's in my mind for a very long time... Who takes pictures of themselves while crying? Why- What's the point? I-
@MissMoontree
Жыл бұрын
Victoria Frances art is really like the Aesthetic. White women in long gowns with heavy running eye make up. Symbols of autumn and death. Each pretty, pale and petite. Never ugly crying
@Blaykat
Жыл бұрын
Honestly, i have nothing to say. "emotions are not a trend." that was beautifully said. This is just such a great video that might help many people. ☺❤
@krakenkrispykremelivinthedream
Жыл бұрын
Suffering is beautiful apparently? Romanticization of depression most likely... :(
@saffyesperas2278
Жыл бұрын
I have anxiety issues and my chest hurts now because I had an anxiety attack. I did not realize I always had them, but it got worse last night. It was hard to control and no one should want it now. They did not want it then when I was labeled "retarded", "stupid", and "nuts" in elementary school by teachers, one principle, and students near my age. I was even called "devil child" and "problem child" by a student and a few vice principals in elementary and middle school. No one would see me as a person hurting. They saw me as lower than an animal. In High School, I was slowly hiding it until I got to an BSC (Behavior Specialist Counselor) and I hid it well over the rest of my years at Leeward except my first year at Leeward. I did not hide it at UH West Oahu because I just exploded and everything came out, it still came out. That is why I believe no one truly wants this and why it is hard to breathe right now.
@cynder6596
Жыл бұрын
Sadness is like a warm, comforting blanket. Its a constant, its trustable, its romanticize-able. Its addictive. It may be unhealthy but its all a person has. Happiness is too hard, sadness is basically just giving up. Giving in to the ocean of apathy.
@Abligurition
Жыл бұрын
Sadness is comfortable, I agree, but I disagree with saying that it is the equivalent of giving up. The fact about sadness is that it must be embraced and understood in order to control it. When you let your sadness take control, it is easy for other people to see your discomfort and empathize with you. Sadness becomes a way to get closer to others, a sort of language.
@cynder6596
Жыл бұрын
@@Abligurition for me it is (giving up). Feeling okay is something i have to spend energy for. Feeling good is something that just randomly happens around once a week when i get a burst of energy. Sadness is my baseline emotion, when i stop trying to feel okay - giving up - i fall back into that sadness.
@Abligurition
Жыл бұрын
@@cynder6596 I understand want you were saying now - I went through it and I was lucky enough to overcome it through therapy and time. I also understand that this path is not always successful for everyone in the same way. I just wanted to ask if you feel hurt or mocked by that kind of content online, or is just something that you know is just a trend, "it doesn't matter".
@cynder6596
Жыл бұрын
@@Abligurition people who make it a trend are normalizing having a bad mental health and mental disorders. They make other people downplay their own mental issues and others mental issues, treating it as if "its normal to feel this way, everyone goes through it. Its just a phase and ill get over it with due time. Im being overdramatic and attention seeking". But time doesnt fix everything. I went a long time trying to wait out this "phase" but it didnt go away, it got even worse. But this is all my opinion so idk.
@cynder6596
Жыл бұрын
So yes. I do feel mocked by it in a way but i can easily understand the other side of it.
@68739
Жыл бұрын
I hate TikTok
@irinakermong1217
Жыл бұрын
It's interesting that the "sad" aesthetic also gets associated with the emo trend of the mid-2000s, but looking back at it, it feels somewhat angrier than the sad girl trope and less passive. The sad girl attracts some kind of misplaced admiration while not getting helped, the emo teen will probably get punched, bite back, and yell at you. And then sulk about it.
@afreeye
Жыл бұрын
i really appreciate this because it lets me know that I'm not the only one who thinks that something that's upsetting should be an 'aesthetic' and people actually agree with me. in my opinion, the 'sad people' try so hard to find something wrong about themselves or try to stay sad by digging the hole deeper than it has to be to get attention or feel 'special', and most of the time they just cried over dropping a sandwich. and I experienced people thinking and telling me that I was telling them that I was depressed for attention when I was just seeking help and wanted to communicate my feelings as a person of color it made me feel so bad but the fact that people who barely have mental illness can get an "awe are you okay" just isn't fair to the people who actually go through lots of stuff in my opinion
@jaaanai
Жыл бұрын
The ambulance breaks need its own series at this point lol. Great video! I was thinking about this. Rachel Bloom's Sexy French Depression does a good satire on the "beautiful sad girls".
@BadAthisOMG
Жыл бұрын
Like as someone with clinical depression, it sucks to see it be turned into some sort of aesthetic bc I was so convinced I would take my own life that I made no plans, saved no money, and basically let my life go to shit, and now I have to fix everything I broke. I basically sabotaged my life. Mental illnesses do more than just make u cry at night lmao
@baileymoran8585
Жыл бұрын
When we wanted people to be more accepting of mental health issues, this is not what we wanted. We wanted to be able to bring it up to a friend when we couldn’t wear the mask anymore, without judgment. We didn’t want want to wear diagnoses on our sleeve and make it our whole identity. We didn’t want to announce every suffering to a mass audience. Attention seeking and over sharing used to be considered a bad thing. All this does is makes people who are going through shit scared to talk about it because we don’t want to be accused of doing it for fashion.
@Tokiiorie21
Жыл бұрын
I really fell like being sad angry or feeling any emotion should not be considered as an aesthetic like it makes not sense to be sad and call it an aesthetic but the world we leave in people just come up with anything really
@hannahkwan4548
Жыл бұрын
I think what I find disturbing about "sad girl" art or makeup is that originally, artists expressed their sadness through art to move on. That was healthy. However, modern "sad girl" makeup and art on the other hand encourages sadness, and rather than expressing it and trying to move on, it is embracing it and imitating it even when unnecessary. It encourages people to find sadness in their life because it is "aesthetic" and "pretty", making this not only an unhealthy, but also a dangerous trend.
@korneliapochec2379
Жыл бұрын
I think Zendaya in Euphoria trying to open a candy was something new, she did not look pretty, I could say she was little disgusting
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